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Rebel Kitty
Posted by jamessavik , Yesterday, 08:05 PM
This is my new kitten Havoc. He plays all the time: we are his human cat toys. He runs, he jumps, he bites, he claws and climbs me causing many lacerations.
In trying to figure out how this spoiled kitty is so rough, I noticed these strange markings on his head.
Coincidence? I think not.
____________________________
PS- I'm back after a cooling off period but II'm not going anywhere NEAR the soapbox.
I'm out of here
Posted by jamessavik , 20 June 2009 - 06:44 PM
I'm tired of the bias.
I'm tired of getting penalized for disagreeing with DK.
OK he owns the place. Fine.
It's all his.
I'm tired of getting penalized for disagreeing with DK.
OK he owns the place. Fine.
It's all his.
Why I'm not in Congress
Posted by jamessavik , 11 March 2009 - 10:07 PM
I may be evil but I do have standards.
Knowing that nobody has actually bothered to read the Pork, I mean Stimilus Package, I would insert the following clause:
Amendment 301.23.451 All states and municipalaties that accept stimilius funds are required to have all of their citizens renounce their faith and begin to worship the evil goddess Globulus. In early April, 100 of the nations best basketball players must be sacrificed to Globulus to avoid a plague of boils and rats.
Amendment 301.23.452 In the event of a plague of boils and rats, the federal goverenment will send 10,000 cats and 10,000 liters of hydrogen peroxide to the afflicted region.
Amendment 301.23.452 In the event that Globulus is further angered, citizens are advised to put their heads between their legs and kiss their ass goodbye because after we've paid for all this bullshit we'll be so broke that we couldn't afford a firecracker much less fight off an evil diety.
Hail Globulus! Give her your children because they annoy the shit out of me in restaurants and on airplanes.
Ah the peace of Globulus the Child-eater. Boy are the right to lifers going to be pissed! Not only are millions of kids going to be eaten by a dusty Babylonian diety, they've got to give up Jebus too!
Just remember- it's a change. Maybe not the one you were looking for but you didn't read the fine print did you?
Bu-wah-hah-hah-hah
Knowing that nobody has actually bothered to read the Pork, I mean Stimilus Package, I would insert the following clause:
Amendment 301.23.451 All states and municipalaties that accept stimilius funds are required to have all of their citizens renounce their faith and begin to worship the evil goddess Globulus. In early April, 100 of the nations best basketball players must be sacrificed to Globulus to avoid a plague of boils and rats.
Amendment 301.23.452 In the event of a plague of boils and rats, the federal goverenment will send 10,000 cats and 10,000 liters of hydrogen peroxide to the afflicted region.
Amendment 301.23.452 In the event that Globulus is further angered, citizens are advised to put their heads between their legs and kiss their ass goodbye because after we've paid for all this bullshit we'll be so broke that we couldn't afford a firecracker much less fight off an evil diety.
Hail Globulus! Give her your children because they annoy the shit out of me in restaurants and on airplanes.
Ah the peace of Globulus the Child-eater. Boy are the right to lifers going to be pissed! Not only are millions of kids going to be eaten by a dusty Babylonian diety, they've got to give up Jebus too!
Just remember- it's a change. Maybe not the one you were looking for but you didn't read the fine print did you?
Bu-wah-hah-hah-hah
Heavy Metals
Posted by jamessavik , 01 March 2009 - 07:05 PM
Heavy Metals
Parliament
Fleet Annex
Epsilon Auriga
April 10, 2681
Ellis Dutton, Chief of the Parliament Office of Galaxy Minerals, looked at the official Request for Proposal that his office had received earlier that day. If he could secure a fraction of the order, his five percent commission would make him rich beyond the dreams of avarice.
He looked at the list and he looked at Captain Osborne of the Fleet Procurement Office and said, “The standard stuff: the Tungsten, Manganese, Magnesium, Titanium— that’s the easy part. We can easily have that for you on time. Even the rare stuff: Platinum, Osmium and Iridium we can have by June 1st. I just don’t know about the radioactives. Uranium238, Plutonium, Neptunium, Promethium: a lot of that stuff is synthetic. We’ll have to run all of our breeder reactors in triple shifts to have this quantity in the purity specified by the contract. We couldn’t even get the permits by June 1st.”
Captain Osborne said, “I have anticipated your needs. With this contract goes a Class 1 license to run breeder reactors on our behalf. It was issued directly by the Executive Committee and is effective immediately. We haven’t got time to play musical bureaucracies with this one. We just need to get the job done.”
Dutton was stunned. In the past, every time he had dealings with Alliance officials it had been like trying to seduce a virgin by proxy with someone on another planet making the decisions and authority to say yes or no was a committee populated by Nuns.
He said, “Won’t the Greens go ape shit? They hate us and they hate our breeder reactors with a purple passion.”
Dutton laughed, “Don’t worry about the Greens. They aren’t a part of the ruling coalition in this Parliament and you’ve got the Executive Committee providing political cover. So what will it be Mr. Dutton? Have we got a deal.”
Dutton’s head was spinning. He had always wanted to be a billionaire. After all these years it was happening. He stood up and extended his hand and said, “Captain Osborne, Galaxy Minerals is pleased to be of service to the Alliance.” The two shook hands and the biggest single procurement of raw strategic resources in the history of the Alliance was a done deal.
“If you will excuse me, I’ve got a lot of work to do but I have a question.”
Captain Osborne said, “I’ll do my best to answer it.”
“Why us? There are at least a dozen concerns that could have filled some or part of this contract.”
Captain Osborne paused for a moment and then replied, “Two simple reasons: One stop shopping and Galaxy Minerals is the only corporation competent and driven enough that we trust to get this done right and on time.“
“Thank you sir. We will not let you down.”
On the way back to his office, Dutton was floating three meters off the ground. What was five percent of 750 billion anyway? With follow-ons and contingencies the contract could eventually grow to over a trillion and a half.
He arrived at his office and told his secretary to set up a secure subspace call to the CEO.
The CEO of Galaxy Minerals was Art Boyle who answered the subspace call in his housecoat. Dutton said, “Good morning Boss. I hope it’s not too early to call.”
“He smiled and said, I was just having breakfast… Mr. Dutton. You are our representative on Parliament aren’t you?”
“Yes sir. A contract just fell in our laps and I wanted you to see it as soon as possible. I’m sending it in a data burst on a sub channel.”
Boyle put on a pair of old fashioned reading glasses and picked up a data pad. “OK. I’ll just have a look… Oh my God! Is this for real?”
Dutton beamed with pride, “Yes sir. I asked him why they single sourced this too us and the Contracting Officer said— because we were the only corporation competent and driven enough to get this done right and on time.”
He took off his glasses and looked at Dutton. “This is… I’m shocked. We’ve had big Alliance contracts before but that’s chump change compared to this. OK- I’m getting my wits back. Send me everything. I’ll have to talk to the board, release the reserve stock and get the guys at Red Rock to get their breeder reactors cranked up. Well done Dutton. You’ve just put this company in the Galaxy 100 with a bullet.”
Parliament
Fleet Annex
Epsilon Auriga
April 10, 2681
Ellis Dutton, Chief of the Parliament Office of Galaxy Minerals, looked at the official Request for Proposal that his office had received earlier that day. If he could secure a fraction of the order, his five percent commission would make him rich beyond the dreams of avarice.
He looked at the list and he looked at Captain Osborne of the Fleet Procurement Office and said, “The standard stuff: the Tungsten, Manganese, Magnesium, Titanium— that’s the easy part. We can easily have that for you on time. Even the rare stuff: Platinum, Osmium and Iridium we can have by June 1st. I just don’t know about the radioactives. Uranium238, Plutonium, Neptunium, Promethium: a lot of that stuff is synthetic. We’ll have to run all of our breeder reactors in triple shifts to have this quantity in the purity specified by the contract. We couldn’t even get the permits by June 1st.”
Captain Osborne said, “I have anticipated your needs. With this contract goes a Class 1 license to run breeder reactors on our behalf. It was issued directly by the Executive Committee and is effective immediately. We haven’t got time to play musical bureaucracies with this one. We just need to get the job done.”
Dutton was stunned. In the past, every time he had dealings with Alliance officials it had been like trying to seduce a virgin by proxy with someone on another planet making the decisions and authority to say yes or no was a committee populated by Nuns.
He said, “Won’t the Greens go ape shit? They hate us and they hate our breeder reactors with a purple passion.”
Dutton laughed, “Don’t worry about the Greens. They aren’t a part of the ruling coalition in this Parliament and you’ve got the Executive Committee providing political cover. So what will it be Mr. Dutton? Have we got a deal.”
Dutton’s head was spinning. He had always wanted to be a billionaire. After all these years it was happening. He stood up and extended his hand and said, “Captain Osborne, Galaxy Minerals is pleased to be of service to the Alliance.” The two shook hands and the biggest single procurement of raw strategic resources in the history of the Alliance was a done deal.
“If you will excuse me, I’ve got a lot of work to do but I have a question.”
Captain Osborne said, “I’ll do my best to answer it.”
“Why us? There are at least a dozen concerns that could have filled some or part of this contract.”
Captain Osborne paused for a moment and then replied, “Two simple reasons: One stop shopping and Galaxy Minerals is the only corporation competent and driven enough that we trust to get this done right and on time.“
“Thank you sir. We will not let you down.”
On the way back to his office, Dutton was floating three meters off the ground. What was five percent of 750 billion anyway? With follow-ons and contingencies the contract could eventually grow to over a trillion and a half.
He arrived at his office and told his secretary to set up a secure subspace call to the CEO.
The CEO of Galaxy Minerals was Art Boyle who answered the subspace call in his housecoat. Dutton said, “Good morning Boss. I hope it’s not too early to call.”
“He smiled and said, I was just having breakfast… Mr. Dutton. You are our representative on Parliament aren’t you?”
“Yes sir. A contract just fell in our laps and I wanted you to see it as soon as possible. I’m sending it in a data burst on a sub channel.”
Boyle put on a pair of old fashioned reading glasses and picked up a data pad. “OK. I’ll just have a look… Oh my God! Is this for real?”
Dutton beamed with pride, “Yes sir. I asked him why they single sourced this too us and the Contracting Officer said— because we were the only corporation competent and driven enough to get this done right and on time.”
He took off his glasses and looked at Dutton. “This is… I’m shocked. We’ve had big Alliance contracts before but that’s chump change compared to this. OK- I’m getting my wits back. Send me everything. I’ll have to talk to the board, release the reserve stock and get the guys at Red Rock to get their breeder reactors cranked up. Well done Dutton. You’ve just put this company in the Galaxy 100 with a bullet.”
Innovation
Posted by jamessavik , 28 February 2009 - 04:38 AM
Innovation
System: Sol
Saturn's moon Titan
Barlow Heavy Industries
April 10, 2681
As the Grayhound class executive transport jumped into the Titan system, Commander Rutledge felt a bit of regret. It wasn't often that he got to travel in such luxery. Grayhound series ships usually shuttled Admirals around to useless meetings but today it was taking his team to do something useful.
Rutledge and his team of five naval archictects and engineers were members of the Fleet's Design Bureau. They were assigned to develop the Fleet's next generation of ships on an impossible schedule and Barlow Industries might have just the edge that they needed.
The Grayhound's pilot activated the PA system in the passenger cabin and said, "We have arrived at Titan and will be landing momentarily. We are cleared directly to the Barlow Naval Yard. Eveyone please be seated and prepare for landing."
Rutledge looked out his window at Titan but he couldn't see very much. Everyone else was looking at Saturn- the ringed gas giant that still intrigued humans after centuries of space travel. Titan's soupy atmosphere obscured all but the most basic details of the surface. The surface of Saturn's largest moon was a key industrial facility and Titan Station in orbit was the largest Fleet installation in Earth's solar system.
The pilot skillfully landed on a waiting pad at Barlow Industries sprawling complex. An eight-wheeled utility crawler attached itself to the hook on the nose of the Grayhound and pulled her into a nearby hanger. Even through the hull they could hear the hiss as the hanger was pressurized and finally an ear rending pop and the ship equalized pressure with the hanger.
Rutledge and his team debarked the ship into a clean, brightly lite hanger and were greeted by a delegation from Barlow Heavy Industries.
A man wearing a lab coat approached Rutledge and extended his hand, "I'm Dan Barlow. Welcome to our facility. I hope you had a good trip."
Rutledge took his hand and said, "We got to fly on a Grayhound. The trip was gravy. We're looking forward to seeing your work with ceramics and advanced composites."
Barlow beamed. "Then lets get to work."
He lead them to a subway car and when everyone had piled in he programmed the car to take them to the R&D center within the complex.
Barlow began speaking as the car got underway. "Pratically every sub-system within star ships is modular these days. Engines come as pre-fabed modules. Power plants come as pre-fabed modules. So do computers, life support systems, weapons- the whole bit. With conventional ship construction, the only thing that is fabricated by hand is the hull."
"We realized in our own yards that if we could pre-fabricate the hull in modules, we would cut construction time for ships of all sizes, lower our labor costs and dramatically reduce the time it takes to build ships of all classes. What our company has been working on for several years is the right mix of technologies to make this happen."
The car came to a stop and Barlow said, follow me to the conference room and I'll show you what we've got."
Rutledge and his team followed Barlow's men up a flight of stairs to another level. He brought them into a nicely appointed conference room where he got down to brass tacks about his new process.
"To make this happen we had to get the right materials, machinery and the technology. First we looked at materials. We experimented with a number of metal alloys and they all had the same problems. Metal components require welds and that creates a structural weakness from the very start. Metals are heavy and they make bright sensor contacts. When we looked at ceramics and carbon composites and realized we had exactly what we needed."
He passed around four samples. "These are the materials that we are plan to use. Two are ceramics and the other two are carbon composites. All four are harder than any metal but have very special properties. Before they are heated, they are more or less a goo and are easily worked by our machinery."
"The second part of our process involves the casting of components.We have created a very special casting machine that is controlled by computer. We put the blueprints in, the computer programs the mold and then we put in one of our four materials and within five minutes we have a cast module that is perfect down to the millimeter and ready for installation."
Jerry Nash, Rutledge's composites expert asked, "How do you eliminate the need for welds?"
Barlow smiled and replied, "Nanotechnology. We put nanites into the material matrix in the casting machine. Once the cast is done, the nanites begin doing their work. They actually knit the material of the hull together in the strongest possible molecular configuration down to the atomic level. They even vary the density of the material to provide radiation protection for the crew that would take inches of highly dense metals like iron or lead. When we put the modules in place, we program the nanites to knit the hull modules together without welds. Its like one very strong whole without seems or welds. The nanites remain in place for the life of the vessel and can perform modifications to the hull or repair damage."
Barlow said, "For military applications I think you'll like the carbon mix. It has the same blackbody curve as carbon and would be hard as hell to pick up on sensors- very stealthy. Enough sales talk. A prototype is worth a thousand words. Let's have a look at a ship built with the carbon composite I like for your ships."
Again the delegation followed Barlow to hanger where a crew was finishing up work on a sporty looking black scout.
Barlow said, "This is my prototype for the Scout-62 contract. We cast its hull this morning, installed the systems and it's ready to fly this afternoon. My cost per unit is less than any conventional shipyard in the Alliance and I can build thousands of them."
Rutledge ran his hand over the smooth hard surface of the scout. He looked at Barlow and he looked at his team and said, "Mr. Barlow. I think we can do business. We need to talk to our superiors but we want to leave you some our designs for your consideration..."
System: Sol
Saturn's moon Titan
Barlow Heavy Industries
April 10, 2681
As the Grayhound class executive transport jumped into the Titan system, Commander Rutledge felt a bit of regret. It wasn't often that he got to travel in such luxery. Grayhound series ships usually shuttled Admirals around to useless meetings but today it was taking his team to do something useful.
Rutledge and his team of five naval archictects and engineers were members of the Fleet's Design Bureau. They were assigned to develop the Fleet's next generation of ships on an impossible schedule and Barlow Industries might have just the edge that they needed.
The Grayhound's pilot activated the PA system in the passenger cabin and said, "We have arrived at Titan and will be landing momentarily. We are cleared directly to the Barlow Naval Yard. Eveyone please be seated and prepare for landing."
Rutledge looked out his window at Titan but he couldn't see very much. Everyone else was looking at Saturn- the ringed gas giant that still intrigued humans after centuries of space travel. Titan's soupy atmosphere obscured all but the most basic details of the surface. The surface of Saturn's largest moon was a key industrial facility and Titan Station in orbit was the largest Fleet installation in Earth's solar system.
The pilot skillfully landed on a waiting pad at Barlow Industries sprawling complex. An eight-wheeled utility crawler attached itself to the hook on the nose of the Grayhound and pulled her into a nearby hanger. Even through the hull they could hear the hiss as the hanger was pressurized and finally an ear rending pop and the ship equalized pressure with the hanger.
Rutledge and his team debarked the ship into a clean, brightly lite hanger and were greeted by a delegation from Barlow Heavy Industries.
A man wearing a lab coat approached Rutledge and extended his hand, "I'm Dan Barlow. Welcome to our facility. I hope you had a good trip."
Rutledge took his hand and said, "We got to fly on a Grayhound. The trip was gravy. We're looking forward to seeing your work with ceramics and advanced composites."
Barlow beamed. "Then lets get to work."
He lead them to a subway car and when everyone had piled in he programmed the car to take them to the R&D center within the complex.
Barlow began speaking as the car got underway. "Pratically every sub-system within star ships is modular these days. Engines come as pre-fabed modules. Power plants come as pre-fabed modules. So do computers, life support systems, weapons- the whole bit. With conventional ship construction, the only thing that is fabricated by hand is the hull."
"We realized in our own yards that if we could pre-fabricate the hull in modules, we would cut construction time for ships of all sizes, lower our labor costs and dramatically reduce the time it takes to build ships of all classes. What our company has been working on for several years is the right mix of technologies to make this happen."
The car came to a stop and Barlow said, follow me to the conference room and I'll show you what we've got."
Rutledge and his team followed Barlow's men up a flight of stairs to another level. He brought them into a nicely appointed conference room where he got down to brass tacks about his new process.
"To make this happen we had to get the right materials, machinery and the technology. First we looked at materials. We experimented with a number of metal alloys and they all had the same problems. Metal components require welds and that creates a structural weakness from the very start. Metals are heavy and they make bright sensor contacts. When we looked at ceramics and carbon composites and realized we had exactly what we needed."
He passed around four samples. "These are the materials that we are plan to use. Two are ceramics and the other two are carbon composites. All four are harder than any metal but have very special properties. Before they are heated, they are more or less a goo and are easily worked by our machinery."
"The second part of our process involves the casting of components.We have created a very special casting machine that is controlled by computer. We put the blueprints in, the computer programs the mold and then we put in one of our four materials and within five minutes we have a cast module that is perfect down to the millimeter and ready for installation."
Jerry Nash, Rutledge's composites expert asked, "How do you eliminate the need for welds?"
Barlow smiled and replied, "Nanotechnology. We put nanites into the material matrix in the casting machine. Once the cast is done, the nanites begin doing their work. They actually knit the material of the hull together in the strongest possible molecular configuration down to the atomic level. They even vary the density of the material to provide radiation protection for the crew that would take inches of highly dense metals like iron or lead. When we put the modules in place, we program the nanites to knit the hull modules together without welds. Its like one very strong whole without seems or welds. The nanites remain in place for the life of the vessel and can perform modifications to the hull or repair damage."
Barlow said, "For military applications I think you'll like the carbon mix. It has the same blackbody curve as carbon and would be hard as hell to pick up on sensors- very stealthy. Enough sales talk. A prototype is worth a thousand words. Let's have a look at a ship built with the carbon composite I like for your ships."
Again the delegation followed Barlow to hanger where a crew was finishing up work on a sporty looking black scout.
Barlow said, "This is my prototype for the Scout-62 contract. We cast its hull this morning, installed the systems and it's ready to fly this afternoon. My cost per unit is less than any conventional shipyard in the Alliance and I can build thousands of them."
Rutledge ran his hand over the smooth hard surface of the scout. He looked at Barlow and he looked at his team and said, "Mr. Barlow. I think we can do business. We need to talk to our superiors but we want to leave you some our designs for your consideration..."
Galaxy Today
Posted by jamessavik , 26 February 2009 - 07:11 AM
The Galaxy Today- Your Source for Alliance News You Can Use
Perry Grant, Political Desk
April 8, 2681
Alliance Senate Takes Up a Massive Series of Bills
Conservatives optimistic, Labor Jubulent, Greens Furious and commentators bewildered
After a series of mysterious closed committe meetings earlier this week, the Alliance Senate has taken up an unprecidented series of bills.
Lead by an unlikely coalition of Senate Conservatives and Labor, a bi-partisan working group has began drafting one of the most far reaching and progressive programs in Alliance history. Tenatively named the Alliance Modernization and Expansion Act, the bill addresses a number of issues that have long been discussed but have never made it out of committe.
The Alliance Modernization and Expansion Act (AME) consists of ten distinct parts
At a cost of some 450 Trillion standard credits, AME is the most expensive single bill ever considered by the Alliance senate. It is also widely considered one of the most timely and progressive bills ever considered by that body.
It seems to offer something for everyone with enthuastic support from politicians both the core systems and the frontier and all of the various parties and factions within the senate. Even the fiscal conservatives are pleased with the bill as it includes a self funding mechanism up front and will pay for itself in economic growth within a decade.
The speed, size and far-reaching scope of AME has many insiders at Parliament stunned. Even powerful lobbists like Jason Devries were caught completely off guard. Devries said, "I had been working, no pleading, for the new jump gate construction and repeal of those awful ICC (Interstellar Commerce and Customs) regulations for twenty years and suddenly overnight it looks like it is happening. I've never seen the Senate display this kind of vision and dare I say even courage in passing a series of bills that will solve todays problems and profoundly affect the future of the Alliance."
Senator Chou yung-Li (New Canton, Conservative) said, "We are espically proud of this bill. It funds itself and does no leave a huge debt burden on future generations while it gives the Alliance the tools with which it can grow and expand."
Not everyone is pleased with AME. Senator Todd Faulks (Sirius, Green) senior member of the Greens party said, "We're making a big mistake selling off those reserved planets. Those are pristine and fragile ecosystems that still have a lot to learn about. By opening them to commerce and colonization, they will be changed forever."
AME is expected to pass the senate either late this week or early next week and will then be taken up by the Executive Committee. Any serious objections to the bill by the Executive Committee will be taken up in Conference. Pending its ratification by the Executive Committee, it could be law by the end of the month.
Economic Analyst like what they've heard so far. Galactic Markets are up 255 points and the D&K index is up a record breaking 22%. Markets appear to be in a broad based rally with blue chip industrials, technology, transport and agro stocks leading the charge.
Perry Grant, Political Desk
April 8, 2681
Alliance Senate Takes Up a Massive Series of Bills
Conservatives optimistic, Labor Jubulent, Greens Furious and commentators bewildered
After a series of mysterious closed committe meetings earlier this week, the Alliance Senate has taken up an unprecidented series of bills.
Lead by an unlikely coalition of Senate Conservatives and Labor, a bi-partisan working group has began drafting one of the most far reaching and progressive programs in Alliance history. Tenatively named the Alliance Modernization and Expansion Act, the bill addresses a number of issues that have long been discussed but have never made it out of committe.
The Alliance Modernization and Expansion Act (AME) consists of ten distinct parts
- Alliance backed low-interest loan program for industrial expansion
- Transit Improvements Including a network of new jumpgates from the core systems to the frontiers
- New R&D partnerships between the Alliance and Corporations
- A modernization and expansion of the Fleet & Marine Corps
- An Expansion of the Merchant Fleet via Low Interest Loans and tax incentives for new construction
- Reform of Commerce Laws Inhibiting Development On the Frontier
- Expansion of the Ministry of Science & Technology
- Designation of duty-free zones to encourage rapid development in economically distressed sectors
- Alliance matching funds for local defense construction
- The sale of rights to key planets for colonization or commercial use to pay for the costs of these new measures
At a cost of some 450 Trillion standard credits, AME is the most expensive single bill ever considered by the Alliance senate. It is also widely considered one of the most timely and progressive bills ever considered by that body.
It seems to offer something for everyone with enthuastic support from politicians both the core systems and the frontier and all of the various parties and factions within the senate. Even the fiscal conservatives are pleased with the bill as it includes a self funding mechanism up front and will pay for itself in economic growth within a decade.
The speed, size and far-reaching scope of AME has many insiders at Parliament stunned. Even powerful lobbists like Jason Devries were caught completely off guard. Devries said, "I had been working, no pleading, for the new jump gate construction and repeal of those awful ICC (Interstellar Commerce and Customs) regulations for twenty years and suddenly overnight it looks like it is happening. I've never seen the Senate display this kind of vision and dare I say even courage in passing a series of bills that will solve todays problems and profoundly affect the future of the Alliance."
Senator Chou yung-Li (New Canton, Conservative) said, "We are espically proud of this bill. It funds itself and does no leave a huge debt burden on future generations while it gives the Alliance the tools with which it can grow and expand."
Not everyone is pleased with AME. Senator Todd Faulks (Sirius, Green) senior member of the Greens party said, "We're making a big mistake selling off those reserved planets. Those are pristine and fragile ecosystems that still have a lot to learn about. By opening them to commerce and colonization, they will be changed forever."
AME is expected to pass the senate either late this week or early next week and will then be taken up by the Executive Committee. Any serious objections to the bill by the Executive Committee will be taken up in Conference. Pending its ratification by the Executive Committee, it could be law by the end of the month.
Economic Analyst like what they've heard so far. Galactic Markets are up 255 points and the D&K index is up a record breaking 22%. Markets appear to be in a broad based rally with blue chip industrials, technology, transport and agro stocks leading the charge.
Politics
Posted by jamessavik , 25 February 2009 - 03:43 AM
Politics
Closed Session of the Alliance Senate Armed Services Committee
Galactic Alliance Parliament
0830 April 5, 2681
The thirty-two Senators of the Alliance Senate Armed Services Committee gathered in the chamber. Some looked bored, a few looked anxious but most were blank and unreadable.
As soon as all the Senators were seated the chairman, Senator Franco Ortega of the New Columbia colony, pounded his gavel and called the meeting to order. "On this date, April 5, 2681 at 0830 Galactic Standard Time I call this Emergency Meeting of the Allianace Armed Forces Committee to order. Gentlemen, this is a closed meeting. We will be discussing matters of the highest level of classification. I remind you that the Official Secrets Act applies and parlimentry privilage does not. Any leaks will be rigorously investigated by Internal Affairs. Everything discussed here is to be consider code-word classified and may not be discussed with anyone without the proper credentials."
"I ask the members to recognize the attendence of Director Markus Jarroe of Alliance Intelligence, the Honerable Olga Sjursen of the Executive Committee and Commander Kyle Dylan of Naval Intelligence. Admiral Chris Jamison will appear via sub space link from Ironman Station. I thank them and you for appearing for this meeting on such short notice." A video screen was lowered against the wall behind the speakers podium with the image of Admiral Jamison.
"This meeting was called at the request of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, Alliance Intelligence Agency and the Executive Directorate. At this point I will turn things over to Director Markus Jarroe."
Jarroe raised his right hand and was sworn in by the Sargent at Arms, "Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth to this committee?"
Jarroe answered, "I do."
The Sargent at Arms said, "Please state your name and position for the record and proceed."
"I am Director Markus Jarroe of Alliance Intelligence Agency. I am here to give you background and reveal several of the Alliances closest held secrets."
"I have no doubt that you've all heard of ancient artifact discovered on the Cygnus Arm called Ironman. I'm about to tell you what we know that we have not released to the public.
"In 2602 on a scouting mission in the galactic halo we encountered an intelligent alien race that we have designated the Andromedans."
Almost instantly there was an outburst from the members and the Chairman pounded his gavel and called the meeting to order.
"We were able to communicate with the Andromedans and found them to be friendly and very much like ourselves. They told us that they were the remnants of a civilization that once ruled the Andromeda galaxy pretty much like we control the Milky Way. While exploring their galaxy, they found an artifact described almost exactly the same as Ironman. They studied it and watched it just like we have with Ironman but for hundreds of years it was inert. One day it gathered fuel from a gas giant which it was orbiting and began transmitting a subspace beacon signal."
"It continued to do so for almost a year and a half. Then it powered up again when the moons were in a rare alignment the artifact opened a gigantic wormhole. Several hours later an invasion fleet invaders poured through wormhole and destroyed everything in their path. The remnants of the Andromeda civilization moved to a small satellite galaxy of the Milky Way where they have been in hiding ever since."
"The Andromedans asked us to keep their existence a secret which is why we have not made the first contact public."
"So, we are confronted with two inescapable facts. First: we know that there are other intelligent, space going races in the universe and one of them is extremely hostile. Second, we may be faced with the immenent prospect of invasion and the clock is ticking."
This time there was no outburst. Politicians, people whose profession was to talk, didn't know what to say.
Chairman Ortega said, "Thank you for your testimony Director Jarroe. The Chair recognizes Admiral Christopher Jamison of the Combined Fleet of the Galactic Alliance. Can you hear me OK Admiral Jamison?"
Admiral Jamison answered, "Yes sir Senator Ortega."
"Consider yourself sworn. You may proceed."
"I am Admiral Jamison and I've been assigned to the Ironman project for the last four years. When I first heard the truth of it, it scared the hell out of me but the Fleet has been preparing for this quietly for decades. We have significant forces in system and heavy reinforcements within a few days jump. I would like to tell you that we could stop the enemy cold but we just don't know."
"Realistically what we expect to happen is that our forces at the jump gate will be overwhelmed. That is where war plan Siberia comes into play."
"We may be faced with a situation where we will have to trade space for time. We have created a series of strong points at strategic positions around the Ironman system. To slow the enemy down while the Alliance can mobilize for war."
"Do we have any questions?"
Hands went up around the table.
Ortega said, "The chair recognizes Senator Halbert of Pacifica."
"The Senator said, "I address my question to Admiral Jamison. My homeworld Pacifica is less than fifty light years away from the Ironhand system and we have over a billion people. Should we be thinking about evacuation?"
Jamison replied, "That's a political question that I just can't answer. That's why we're talking to you today."
Hands raised again. Ortaga said, "The chair recognizes Senator Keller of New Caldonia."
Senator Keller said, "I want to address my question to Director Jarroe. How real is this threat. We're talking about a race that is eons old. Maybe they died out. Maybe they've settled in Andromeda."
Director Jarroe replied, "We have high confidence that the threat is very real. We have found other artifacts within the galaxy that we know were left by the race we call the Galaxians. According to the Andromedans, they move around the local group of galaxies and destroy civilizations that could challenge them and take what they want. They had scouts in our own galaxy as late as a few hundred years ago. In fact we are sure that they abducted humans from Earth."
Ortega said, "The chair recognizes Senator Renault of Rigel."
Renault said, "I want to address my question to Admiral Jamison. What can we do to help."
Admiral Jamison said, "Thanks for the question. It's the most impotrtant one that we can ask at this point."
"We need to go to full mobilization. We need ships, fighters and ordinance. We need speed the development of new weapons and a new generation of ships. We need trained crews, officers and pilots. We need funding and a lot of it. We need to prepare. Not just the fleet but our people too. We may be in for a long, ugly war with an enemy that is thousands of years ahead of us in technology. We need everything and we've only got a year and a half to get ready."
Closed Session of the Alliance Senate Armed Services Committee
Galactic Alliance Parliament
0830 April 5, 2681
The thirty-two Senators of the Alliance Senate Armed Services Committee gathered in the chamber. Some looked bored, a few looked anxious but most were blank and unreadable.
As soon as all the Senators were seated the chairman, Senator Franco Ortega of the New Columbia colony, pounded his gavel and called the meeting to order. "On this date, April 5, 2681 at 0830 Galactic Standard Time I call this Emergency Meeting of the Allianace Armed Forces Committee to order. Gentlemen, this is a closed meeting. We will be discussing matters of the highest level of classification. I remind you that the Official Secrets Act applies and parlimentry privilage does not. Any leaks will be rigorously investigated by Internal Affairs. Everything discussed here is to be consider code-word classified and may not be discussed with anyone without the proper credentials."
"I ask the members to recognize the attendence of Director Markus Jarroe of Alliance Intelligence, the Honerable Olga Sjursen of the Executive Committee and Commander Kyle Dylan of Naval Intelligence. Admiral Chris Jamison will appear via sub space link from Ironman Station. I thank them and you for appearing for this meeting on such short notice." A video screen was lowered against the wall behind the speakers podium with the image of Admiral Jamison.
"This meeting was called at the request of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, Alliance Intelligence Agency and the Executive Directorate. At this point I will turn things over to Director Markus Jarroe."
Jarroe raised his right hand and was sworn in by the Sargent at Arms, "Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth to this committee?"
Jarroe answered, "I do."
The Sargent at Arms said, "Please state your name and position for the record and proceed."
"I am Director Markus Jarroe of Alliance Intelligence Agency. I am here to give you background and reveal several of the Alliances closest held secrets."
"I have no doubt that you've all heard of ancient artifact discovered on the Cygnus Arm called Ironman. I'm about to tell you what we know that we have not released to the public.
"In 2602 on a scouting mission in the galactic halo we encountered an intelligent alien race that we have designated the Andromedans."
Almost instantly there was an outburst from the members and the Chairman pounded his gavel and called the meeting to order.
"We were able to communicate with the Andromedans and found them to be friendly and very much like ourselves. They told us that they were the remnants of a civilization that once ruled the Andromeda galaxy pretty much like we control the Milky Way. While exploring their galaxy, they found an artifact described almost exactly the same as Ironman. They studied it and watched it just like we have with Ironman but for hundreds of years it was inert. One day it gathered fuel from a gas giant which it was orbiting and began transmitting a subspace beacon signal."
"It continued to do so for almost a year and a half. Then it powered up again when the moons were in a rare alignment the artifact opened a gigantic wormhole. Several hours later an invasion fleet invaders poured through wormhole and destroyed everything in their path. The remnants of the Andromeda civilization moved to a small satellite galaxy of the Milky Way where they have been in hiding ever since."
"The Andromedans asked us to keep their existence a secret which is why we have not made the first contact public."
"So, we are confronted with two inescapable facts. First: we know that there are other intelligent, space going races in the universe and one of them is extremely hostile. Second, we may be faced with the immenent prospect of invasion and the clock is ticking."
This time there was no outburst. Politicians, people whose profession was to talk, didn't know what to say.
Chairman Ortega said, "Thank you for your testimony Director Jarroe. The Chair recognizes Admiral Christopher Jamison of the Combined Fleet of the Galactic Alliance. Can you hear me OK Admiral Jamison?"
Admiral Jamison answered, "Yes sir Senator Ortega."
"Consider yourself sworn. You may proceed."
"I am Admiral Jamison and I've been assigned to the Ironman project for the last four years. When I first heard the truth of it, it scared the hell out of me but the Fleet has been preparing for this quietly for decades. We have significant forces in system and heavy reinforcements within a few days jump. I would like to tell you that we could stop the enemy cold but we just don't know."
"Realistically what we expect to happen is that our forces at the jump gate will be overwhelmed. That is where war plan Siberia comes into play."
"We may be faced with a situation where we will have to trade space for time. We have created a series of strong points at strategic positions around the Ironman system. To slow the enemy down while the Alliance can mobilize for war."
"Do we have any questions?"
Hands went up around the table.
Ortega said, "The chair recognizes Senator Halbert of Pacifica."
"The Senator said, "I address my question to Admiral Jamison. My homeworld Pacifica is less than fifty light years away from the Ironhand system and we have over a billion people. Should we be thinking about evacuation?"
Jamison replied, "That's a political question that I just can't answer. That's why we're talking to you today."
Hands raised again. Ortaga said, "The chair recognizes Senator Keller of New Caldonia."
Senator Keller said, "I want to address my question to Director Jarroe. How real is this threat. We're talking about a race that is eons old. Maybe they died out. Maybe they've settled in Andromeda."
Director Jarroe replied, "We have high confidence that the threat is very real. We have found other artifacts within the galaxy that we know were left by the race we call the Galaxians. According to the Andromedans, they move around the local group of galaxies and destroy civilizations that could challenge them and take what they want. They had scouts in our own galaxy as late as a few hundred years ago. In fact we are sure that they abducted humans from Earth."
Ortega said, "The chair recognizes Senator Renault of Rigel."
Renault said, "I want to address my question to Admiral Jamison. What can we do to help."
Admiral Jamison said, "Thanks for the question. It's the most impotrtant one that we can ask at this point."
"We need to go to full mobilization. We need ships, fighters and ordinance. We need speed the development of new weapons and a new generation of ships. We need trained crews, officers and pilots. We need funding and a lot of it. We need to prepare. Not just the fleet but our people too. We may be in for a long, ugly war with an enemy that is thousands of years ahead of us in technology. We need everything and we've only got a year and a half to get ready."
Ironman Stirs
Posted by jamessavik , 24 February 2009 - 05:08 AM
Ironman Stirs
In 2660 Dr. Dylan Yarlburo published a 15,000 page volume with the ponderous title Ironman: A Survey of 100 Years of Study. It was met in the academic world with deafening silence. Ironman had become junk science. Its study had occupied many careers and had banished many promising scientests to obscurity.
Ironman simply defied the best minds in in the Galactic Aliiance. Even after 100 years of constant surveillance with the best technology the dark hulk was as big a mystery as ever.
The consensus of scientific opinion was that Ironman was a very powerful alien device constructed for an unknown purpose. An artifact of an ancient race whose purpose and motives humanity could only guess about.
By 2677 the Alliance senate questioned the need to continue funding ongoing scientific and military surveillance of the object. The military was able to stave off cuts because of their considerable investment in support installations in the system.
The study of Ironman had become the academic graveyard. Only underacheiving grad students or scientests trying to resurrect flagging careers could be recruiting to man the research station that monitered the hulk.
On April 3, 2681 a graduate student named Carl Grant was dozing while sitting at the main console of the research station located on the moon simply known as 11-C. The instruments came to life starting him. Ironman's power generation went up 11,000%.
On the surface of Ironman a huge ice flat vaporized in an instant and a tight blue beam reached out to the gas giant below.
Over the next few hours Grant watched as Ironman greedily devoured several hundred billion liters of liquid hydrogen from the gas giant below.
Three hours and twenty-two minutes later, the beam ceased almost as suddenly as it began.
A thick cloud of foggy gas covered Ironman making it look even more mysterious than ever.
Nervous calls went out. The fleet base went on alert and all available ships slipped their moorings and took up position several million kilometers from Ironman. Someone on Admiral Jamison's staff orddered a news blackout after the research station had already begun transmitting data to the various institutes in the Alliance that still had research interests in Ironman.
Despite the communications blackout, the news of Ironman's awakening spread like wildfire. The military's blackout fueled rampant speculation by conspiracy theorists across the Alliance. Rumors began to spread about military leaves being cancled and ships unexpectedly moving out. Galactic News reported that the Alliance Fleet had been mobilized for wargames.
After Ironman fed on the gas giant, it began to do things that no one had seen it do over the century that it had been under close observation.
Whole regions of ice vaporized. New features began to appear on its surface. Rows of blue, green, red and white lights appeared. After spiking during those first four hours, the objects power output came down but stabilized at a much higher level than had ever been observed.
Ironman began to emit a powerful regular pulse in the subspace communications bands.
Special teams of first-contact specialists tried desperatly to communicate with Ironman. They sent prime numbers. They sent mathematical symbols. They sent everything they could think of. Ironman may have been talking but he wasn't talking to anyone human.
Alliance Fleet Intelligence identified the signal. It was a beacon.
In 2660 Dr. Dylan Yarlburo published a 15,000 page volume with the ponderous title Ironman: A Survey of 100 Years of Study. It was met in the academic world with deafening silence. Ironman had become junk science. Its study had occupied many careers and had banished many promising scientests to obscurity.
Ironman simply defied the best minds in in the Galactic Aliiance. Even after 100 years of constant surveillance with the best technology the dark hulk was as big a mystery as ever.
The consensus of scientific opinion was that Ironman was a very powerful alien device constructed for an unknown purpose. An artifact of an ancient race whose purpose and motives humanity could only guess about.
By 2677 the Alliance senate questioned the need to continue funding ongoing scientific and military surveillance of the object. The military was able to stave off cuts because of their considerable investment in support installations in the system.
The study of Ironman had become the academic graveyard. Only underacheiving grad students or scientests trying to resurrect flagging careers could be recruiting to man the research station that monitered the hulk.
On April 3, 2681 a graduate student named Carl Grant was dozing while sitting at the main console of the research station located on the moon simply known as 11-C. The instruments came to life starting him. Ironman's power generation went up 11,000%.
On the surface of Ironman a huge ice flat vaporized in an instant and a tight blue beam reached out to the gas giant below.
Over the next few hours Grant watched as Ironman greedily devoured several hundred billion liters of liquid hydrogen from the gas giant below.
Three hours and twenty-two minutes later, the beam ceased almost as suddenly as it began.
A thick cloud of foggy gas covered Ironman making it look even more mysterious than ever.
Nervous calls went out. The fleet base went on alert and all available ships slipped their moorings and took up position several million kilometers from Ironman. Someone on Admiral Jamison's staff orddered a news blackout after the research station had already begun transmitting data to the various institutes in the Alliance that still had research interests in Ironman.
Despite the communications blackout, the news of Ironman's awakening spread like wildfire. The military's blackout fueled rampant speculation by conspiracy theorists across the Alliance. Rumors began to spread about military leaves being cancled and ships unexpectedly moving out. Galactic News reported that the Alliance Fleet had been mobilized for wargames.
After Ironman fed on the gas giant, it began to do things that no one had seen it do over the century that it had been under close observation.
Whole regions of ice vaporized. New features began to appear on its surface. Rows of blue, green, red and white lights appeared. After spiking during those first four hours, the objects power output came down but stabilized at a much higher level than had ever been observed.
Ironman began to emit a powerful regular pulse in the subspace communications bands.
Special teams of first-contact specialists tried desperatly to communicate with Ironman. They sent prime numbers. They sent mathematical symbols. They sent everything they could think of. Ironman may have been talking but he wasn't talking to anyone human.
Alliance Fleet Intelligence identified the signal. It was a beacon.
Invasion
Posted by jamessavik , 21 February 2009 - 03:37 AM
Ironman
In 2531 the galactic survey cruiser Cabot entered CYG 035-4122 on a routine mapping mission. There was absolutely nothing out of the ordinary about the system. CYG 035-4122 was ordinary in all respects with a dwarf star and an average planetary system. It was merely one of thousands charted during the First Galactic Survey. What the Cabot found there would have profound implications for humanity.
The Cabot entered the system and began a routine scan of the single class K4 dwarf star, 6 terresterial planets, 5 gas giants and discovered a mysterious energy reading from one of the six moons around the last gas giant. After charting the system, the Cabot approached the "moon" to get more detailed scans. Even from millions of kilometers away, it was obviously very different from the typical icy, rocky moons usually found around gas giant planets.
On their approach the science officer first noticed the eccentricity of the orbits of the planets six major moons. He ran some calculations on the mechanics of the moons orbits. The sixty kilometer moon was massive and extremely dense effecting not only the orbits of the moons but the planets orbit around its sun.
The Cabot took up a high orbit of the mysterious moon. On the outside it was covered with several meters of hydrogen-methane ices. Just under its icy crust, it was a solid, metallic perfect sphere. It could not be a natural object.
The Cabot stayed on station studying the object for a week. Her crew could find no access or portal into what could only be described as a massive structure. The sphere gave up none of its secrets.
Frustrated by what the crew knew must be a great oppertunity for discovery, they left a long term monitering satellite and continued their survey.
Two standard Later later the sceince ships Niels Bohr arrived at CYG 035-4122 and began a long term study of the object. Eventually a research station was established on one of the other moons of the gas giant.
Papers were written, theories were forwarded but the sphere yielded none of its secrets with the exception of one: from its particle emission profile, it could only have a point singularity power source at its core. The object was a gigantic sleeping titan with a beating heart of raw, unlimited power.
The object made some people very nervous. In all of the millions of charted star systems in man-kinds ever growing databases, nothing had ever been found even remotely like it. Scientests, the military and corperations throughout the galaxy desired its secrets but no one could could unlock the enigma that the military codenamed Ironman.
By 2540 CYG 035-4122 was home to three research stations and was the Galactic Alliance's largest fleet anchorage for 400 light years in any direction. Study of the IronMan became an industry of its own.
After years of fruitless study, Ironman became something of a scientific white elephant. Its study was put on the backburner and all but one of the research stations closed. There was talk of closing IronMan Anchorage but there were those in the Admiralty who made keeping their presence in the system a priority.
Rumors and legends swirled around Ironman. For decades it was a favorite of tabloids and conspiracy theorists. Every decade or so interest in Ironman was revived in popular culture. It was the topic of numerous holo-books and movies and finally a footnote in the history of the fast growing Alliance that was quickly populating the galaxy.
In 2531 the galactic survey cruiser Cabot entered CYG 035-4122 on a routine mapping mission. There was absolutely nothing out of the ordinary about the system. CYG 035-4122 was ordinary in all respects with a dwarf star and an average planetary system. It was merely one of thousands charted during the First Galactic Survey. What the Cabot found there would have profound implications for humanity.
The Cabot entered the system and began a routine scan of the single class K4 dwarf star, 6 terresterial planets, 5 gas giants and discovered a mysterious energy reading from one of the six moons around the last gas giant. After charting the system, the Cabot approached the "moon" to get more detailed scans. Even from millions of kilometers away, it was obviously very different from the typical icy, rocky moons usually found around gas giant planets.
On their approach the science officer first noticed the eccentricity of the orbits of the planets six major moons. He ran some calculations on the mechanics of the moons orbits. The sixty kilometer moon was massive and extremely dense effecting not only the orbits of the moons but the planets orbit around its sun.
The Cabot took up a high orbit of the mysterious moon. On the outside it was covered with several meters of hydrogen-methane ices. Just under its icy crust, it was a solid, metallic perfect sphere. It could not be a natural object.
The Cabot stayed on station studying the object for a week. Her crew could find no access or portal into what could only be described as a massive structure. The sphere gave up none of its secrets.
Frustrated by what the crew knew must be a great oppertunity for discovery, they left a long term monitering satellite and continued their survey.
Two standard Later later the sceince ships Niels Bohr arrived at CYG 035-4122 and began a long term study of the object. Eventually a research station was established on one of the other moons of the gas giant.
Papers were written, theories were forwarded but the sphere yielded none of its secrets with the exception of one: from its particle emission profile, it could only have a point singularity power source at its core. The object was a gigantic sleeping titan with a beating heart of raw, unlimited power.
The object made some people very nervous. In all of the millions of charted star systems in man-kinds ever growing databases, nothing had ever been found even remotely like it. Scientests, the military and corperations throughout the galaxy desired its secrets but no one could could unlock the enigma that the military codenamed Ironman.
By 2540 CYG 035-4122 was home to three research stations and was the Galactic Alliance's largest fleet anchorage for 400 light years in any direction. Study of the IronMan became an industry of its own.
After years of fruitless study, Ironman became something of a scientific white elephant. Its study was put on the backburner and all but one of the research stations closed. There was talk of closing IronMan Anchorage but there were those in the Admiralty who made keeping their presence in the system a priority.
Rumors and legends swirled around Ironman. For decades it was a favorite of tabloids and conspiracy theorists. Every decade or so interest in Ironman was revived in popular culture. It was the topic of numerous holo-books and movies and finally a footnote in the history of the fast growing Alliance that was quickly populating the galaxy.
Part 3- Sheba Gains Fame
Posted by jamessavik , 22 January 2009 - 07:52 PM
I’m not exactly sure when Sheba became a celebrity.
It could have been when she walked into the living room when my Mom was hosting twenty of her fellow teachers and politely asked, “Wa-wa?”
All conversation came to an abrupt stop as my Mom walked into the kitchen and gave her a dish of water.
Mrs. Martin, one of her fellow teachers asked, “Excuse me Emmaline, but did that cat just ask for some water?”
My Mom said, without batting and eyelash, “Why yes, she did.”
Before their meeting was over, Sheba walked to the front door and sat down. When no one noticed, she said, “Won-out.”
My Mom calmly opened the door and let her out while her guests were choking on their crumpets.
While adults are easily amused, kids are a tougher audience to impress. Sheba followed me over to a friends house. One of the neighbors had a white Spitz that was known to be a bad dog.
My friend said, “You had better look out for you cat. Franz will kill her.”
Sure enough Franz saw Sheba and charged her. There, in front of four six and seven year olds, Sheba unleashed some cat-fu that would have impressed Bruce Lee on that poor dog, slapping his face, jumping over his head, landing on his back with her claws.
The poor beast yelped and tried to run away with Sheba attached to his back like a jockey.
From then on, whenever that dog saw Sheba, he went into his garage and sulked.
Even kids that didn’t like cats liked Sheba because she wasn’t just a cat. She had become one of the guys.
It could have been when she walked into the living room when my Mom was hosting twenty of her fellow teachers and politely asked, “Wa-wa?”
All conversation came to an abrupt stop as my Mom walked into the kitchen and gave her a dish of water.
Mrs. Martin, one of her fellow teachers asked, “Excuse me Emmaline, but did that cat just ask for some water?”
My Mom said, without batting and eyelash, “Why yes, she did.”
Before their meeting was over, Sheba walked to the front door and sat down. When no one noticed, she said, “Won-out.”
My Mom calmly opened the door and let her out while her guests were choking on their crumpets.
While adults are easily amused, kids are a tougher audience to impress. Sheba followed me over to a friends house. One of the neighbors had a white Spitz that was known to be a bad dog.
My friend said, “You had better look out for you cat. Franz will kill her.”
Sure enough Franz saw Sheba and charged her. There, in front of four six and seven year olds, Sheba unleashed some cat-fu that would have impressed Bruce Lee on that poor dog, slapping his face, jumping over his head, landing on his back with her claws.
The poor beast yelped and tried to run away with Sheba attached to his back like a jockey.
From then on, whenever that dog saw Sheba, he went into his garage and sulked.
Even kids that didn’t like cats liked Sheba because she wasn’t just a cat. She had become one of the guys.
