One of the first things that struck me when I read this was the honesty.

It is easy to blame others for our problems. To accept the victim role and use that to fire our anger.

But the narrator didn't do that. He acknowledges that there were those who supported him during his struggles. He acknowledges that while the past has hurt him, his issues are now within himself and not with those around him.

Everyone is the sum of their past. It is what they do with that history, and how they move forward that is important. The narrator seems to recognise this, but he also points out that the past can bind -- a set of manacles that are not easily released. He is searching for how to undo those manacles because he knows that the answer isn't just inside himself. He knows he needs someone -- a shoulder to cry on -- as if he feels that sharing the painful past can help set him free.

There are so many snippets I could quote from this short piece -- phrases that speak to me, that tug at my heart. However, I'll keep myself down to a handful.



I thought this was very striking. There's not a lot of imagery in this piece, but this is one that jumped out at me. One of things I noticed was that it was both cruelty and sorrow. The later is the interesting one -- what is the sorrow? The sorrow of the narrator for a childhood lost, or the sorrow of those around him that were unable, or unwilling, to stop the cruelty?



The goal is good. The optimism at the end is great, but I'm worried by the sword and balm. The narrator said earlier that he hides inside a dispassionate exterior. He needs to be able to open up, even if it is selectively. He needs to make sure he only uses the sword of dispassion against those he doesn't care for -- it is too easy to use it against those that would like to help, those that would like to get closer to him. The same applies for the balm of cynicism.

I'm hopeful for the narrator. The honesty in which this is written bodes well for his future. His intellect is strong and I'm keeping my fingers crossed that he finds that shoulder to cry on -- the one who'll help release him from those manacle.

A very strong and thought-provoking piece. Thanks, Menzo! Based on the comments at the end, I suspect the narrator is Menzo himself, but I won't assume that. I'll just wish whoever it is all the best.

Definitely a very poignant writing! Amazing.

I felt like discovering the narrator from exterior, then going outside.

First, it starts with the house, then it says about the narrator- this coldness, confidence. Shortly we learn that all this is just a mask, a facade. The real him, which is hidden deeper inside, isn't like that. And he does tell why.

It's rather sad. The bitterness, despair, lack of love is very visible.

Ieshwar

I don't know what I should say, except thank you.

Camy