.After 'giving' the present to CJ he suggested that I post it here as well. So that's what I've done. So here is CJ's Christmas present for the entire Herd of Capricans to enjoy. Hopefully you like it as much as I did creating it.
Steve
Just Kidding
An unusual cool breeze was blowing from the South today, a bit of salt in the air which meant that the winds off the Victorian coast by Melbourne must be strong. Not often did the coastal breezes make it far enough in land to the town of Tooboroc. But the wind was the least of the worries of a farmer who had a goat in labour for the last six hours.
Usually a nanny in labour was only an hour or so, at most a two hour event. But this poor mother was having a struggle with getting the unborn kidd to come into the world. The farmer contemplated ringing up the vet after the second hour, and once again in the third hour. Unfortunately the vet was in Melbourne at some conference and he only received voice mail. All the farmer could do was to make the mother comfortable and be ready for the kidd when it finally arrived, still born or not. What concerned the farmer even more was that this goat was about a month overdue from the usual gestational period of goats.
Finally after a sudden increase of bleating from the mother, the farmer noticed the rump of a kidd starting to make its way out. No wonder the mother was struggling so much, it was in breach. Realizing it was now or never, the farmer was able to manoeuvre a hand inside to grasp both of the hind legs and gently ease the kidd away from the mother. Finally with the head out, the farmer was amazed at the size of the goat being just born. Its black coat was still covered in afterbirth and the little bugger had horns already growing from his head.
The kid took its first breath and kicked and bolted into an upright position. Looking down at his mom still on the ground, he immediately went over and started nursing on one of her teats. The farmer was concerned about the condition of the mother, and pulled the kidd away and decided that bottle feeding would have to be the most appropriate way to save both of them. Sure, there would be ramifications later in life for this goat for not getting the opportunity to feed off his mother, but he was so well developed the farmer was sure he would survive without it.
After ensuring the mother was comfortable the farmer carried the kidd into the stable to clean him up. The farmer was amazed at the nearly half grown size of the goat. After washing him down he was shocked again. Since the farmer usually made his male kidds into wethers (castrated males) because they would have a better grade and quantity of meat, he was taken aback by not only the development, but also the size of this kidd’s endowment. Figuring that he could sell this goat as a stud, he decided on forgoing the castration.
About a month later, the farmer started getting concerned with the new kidd; CJ was his name from the initials from his nanny and billy. CJ was showing all the signs of being ready to mate, but it wasn’t even rutting season. Furthermore, he seemed to be more interested in the other billies and wethers in the herd than the females. The farmer just wrote it off as him being too immature to distinguish the difference. Finally after watching another month of CJ trying to mate with other males, the farmer decided it was time to sell the kidd while he could still make a good dollar off of him.
Overall, CJ was a happy-go-lucky kidd. He loved to frolic with the other goats and had a pretty easy time. When a truck pulled into the farmyard one day, and he saw the farmer pointing him out to the man who was opening the trailer he was towing, CJ grew concerned. He knew something was up, and it involved him. He knew that this new man with the truck and trailer was coming to take him away. What CJ didn’t know was that the man, named Graeme, was an international livestock broker and Australia would soon be his former home. CJ tried to hide amongst the other goats, but was easily pulled out by the farmer. Bleating and kicking, the farmer finally had to hog tie him to get him into the trailer. The last thing the farmer saw of CJ was the look of death in CJ’s eyes towards him as the trailer door was closed, leaving him alone in the dark, smelly trailer. The next time he saw daylight was when the trailer was opened and he was roughly thrown into a crate and then finally had the ropes cut from binding his legs.
As far as CJ could tell, he was now in a cargo hold of a ship heading away from his birthplace. Everyday a man appeared and fed him and some other farm animals some slop in a bucket, but CJ was yearning to run in a field with some other goats like in the past. He missed grazing on the fresh grass that he had grown to love.
Finally after a couple of weeks, CJ’s crate was off loaded where another farmer took his crate and loaded into the back of a truck. Luckily since the crate was somewhat open, CJ could breathe the fresh air and see the scenery as it passed by. He was intrigued with the canals that lined the roads as they made their way through the city. Finally, after leaving the city, he noticed lush mountains with what appeared to be grapes growing up and down the slopes. Everywhere he looked, everything was green.
After a few hours of driving, the farmer slowed down and stopped to open a gate. CJ”s ears perked up a bit when he heard some bleating in the distance. This must be his new home. For the first time in what seemed forever, CJ was looking forward to the future. Finally when the farmer had driven the truck through the gate, and stopped and closed it, he drove up to a barn. The farmer backed up the truck to a paddock and opened the end of the crate. CJ immediately bolted from the crate and ran as fast and as far from the farmer as he could get.
At the back end of the paddock, CJ saw a small herd of goats grazing in the grass. He slowly approached the herd as they were all unfamiliar. Most of the other goats noticed CJ immediately and began checking him out. CJ reciprocated, and came to the realization that he was in a herd of nannies, with no other males with him. Disappointed for the moment, he decided that it was much better than being boxed up in a crate and began grazing himself.
Life pretty well continued on as normal for CJ over the next year. He enjoyed having his freedom again, enjoyed playing with the other goats, and enjoyed eating whenever he felt like it. He also began to distrust the farmer, as he seemed to be getting more and more upset with CJ as the weeks passed on. At times the farmer would segregate him from all the nannies except for one. As long as CJ could still graze, he really didn’t care.
At one point, the farmer began to wonder if it was such a good investment in purchasing this stud goat from Australia. Yes he was of good stature, and yes he had all the equipment to do the job, but he just didn’t seem interested in mating at any time with the nannies. The farmer even went so far as to consult with a veterinarian about what could be causing this. The vet gave him two possibilities. First was that the goat was lacking male competition, therefore was not generating the hormones needed to begin the rutting season. Another male goat would be the only way he could find out if this was true. The other solution, much to the farmer’s dismay, was that he had bought a gay goat. Barely getting by on the milk the nannies produced, he used his savings to purchase this stud. Since it appeared that he wouldn’t be making any offspring for the farmer, he considered getting rid of CJ, since he could not afford another male goat to just find out if he was gay or not.
One day in town for an espresso, the farmer was chatting with some of his fellow farmers in the area. Needless to say the farmer was not thrilled to be teased for buying a gay goat; he however got a couple of ideas from them. One was that quite often local goats were sold from Italy to Mauritius. The Mauritian consumed a lot of goat meat, and found Italian goat meat to be some of the best in the world. Unfortunately the idea was quashed when it was mentioned that he would have to prove to have been born and raised in Italy.
The second was to just sell CJ, the same way that he had purchased him a year earlier. Sell him to some unsuspecting livestock broker, and get some of his savings back. On the drive back to the farm the farmer decided this is what would be done with CJ.
About a week later, a Frenchman by the name of Francois came out to the farm. After he checked CJ over, he decided that he was worth the money that the farmer was asking. Money exchanged hands and Francois informed the farmer to have the goat crated up at the docks for shipping to America the next day. CJ was not oblivious to what was going on and vowed that he was not going to be shipped away again.
The next morning, as the dew was still fresh in the paddock, the farmer appeared in the paddock with a crate. CJ had not slept all night and was awaiting the farmer when he arrived. With all his might, CJ lowered his head and charged at the farmer when he was bent over, not facing him, with the intention of butting his sorry ass into the crate himself.
Unsuspecting CJ’s plan, the farmer had arisen early to hopefully catch CJ still half asleep. He was totally shocked when he bent over to open the crate, to feel goat horns being driven into his buttocks. Yelling in pain, the farmer leaped up and started chasing CJ around the paddock. This continued for several minutes until finally the farmer cornered him against the fence. CJ lowered his head to prepare for the duel but before he could make a run at the farmer, the man lunged himself upon CJ, flattening him to the ground. After much struggling, cursing, and bleating, the farmer finally began to drag CJ by his hind legs to the crate. Securing the crate quickly, he loaded him up into the back of the truck. The farmer was so enraged with the goat that he was about to spit in its face, when he noticed CJ’s eyes. They were aflame with a red glow, a glow which seethed of hatred, a hatred that the farmer had never seen before.
It seemed all too soon that CJ found that he was leaving the countryside and mountains and was back at the docks in the city. He was loaded into another cargo ship, and finally became resigned that he was off to a new land once again.
The next month was a blur for CJ again, as he spent most of the day in a dark hold, only receiving a bucket of slop once every two days. It gave time for CJ to reflect back on the two farmers, the one in Tooboroc, and the one in Italy, and only fuelled his desire for revenge some day.
Finally reaching the port of Houston, CJ was offloaded and then put in a trailer with a bunch of other goats heading to Dallas. Once again, CJ was just relieved that he got to inhale the fresh air, feel the breeze and see the sunlight. Although the sunlight was blinding to his sensitive eyes, he did enjoy it. He wondered about the shaded spectacles that the workers wore over their eyes, and wished he had a pair for himself.
Later that day, CJ arrived at his new home on the outskirts of Dallas. He was tired from his ordeal and immediately went over to a corner in the field where he decided to lay down and fall asleep from exhaustion.
When he woke up the next morning, he groggily noticed a very cute young blond guy by the name of Kevin. Kevin had some warmed milk for him, and gently stroked his back and belly, and told him to relax. For the first time in his life, CJ actually trusted a human. He wasn’t exactly sure what it was that let him trust him, but he imagined his always bright smile, and his sweet voice was the foremost things.
After a few days, CJ was invigorated with a new attitude. Everyday Kevin came and played with CJ and made him feel better. One day after they had been having a shoving match, CJ with his horns, and Kevin with both palms, Kevin sat down against the fence and CJ came over to be with him.
“CJ” Kevin started out. “I don’t know what it is about you, but you are someone very special to me. If my friends could see me talking to a goat, they would think I’m crazy. I do have to tell you something though, and it really saddens me for a couple of reasons.”
Kevin sighed, but then turned on his grin. “It turns out that as of tomorrow, I’m going to be unemployed. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing as I can now concentrate more on my schooling now. The reason I’m going to be unemployed is that this farm has been declared bankrupt. What that means is that you have been sold in an auction and will be moving out to California tomorrow.”
Kevin noticed CJ tensing up, and his eyes beginning to change to a bright red. Shocked at the change in CJ, Kevin smiled and said “But don’t worry, I checked out the farm your going to, and it looks like a great place. They had an email address and I got a reply from a guy who is the farmers’ son named Steve. He is little older than me, but sounds like he is a great guy. There are acres upon acres of grass fields to play in, and I told him a little about you. He’ll be waiting for you, and I’m sure your going to have a good friend in him.”
CJ was a little more relaxed hearing this, and actually began to nuzzle up against Kevin. Kevin hugged CJ and started to say his goodbyes. As he was walking away from the dejected looking CJ, he turned back and his face lit up with one of his award winning smiles. He came back to CJ and took off his sunglasses and put them on him. “Keep smiling CJ, the glasses will help Steve pick you out in a crowd.” With that and a final wave Kevin was gone.
The next day CJ was loaded up with the other goats onto what appeared to be a cattle liner. There were two drivers so surprisingly enough; CJ was at his new home in little over 24 hours. What shocked CJ was the amount of people in cars everywhere. He also seemed to have some trouble with breathing the air. His throat seemed very dry and irritated, and he wondered if it was from the haze that made it impossible to clearly see the sun in the day or the moon at night.
When they arrived at the new farm, he was being offloaded when he noticed a really attractive guy smiling at him. This great looking man walked up to CJ and said “Hey. You must be CJ. Kevin told me about you in an email, and from his description, and your designer Armani sunglasses, you must be him!”
CJ was instantly stunned by the looks of this human, and knew right away that he had a friend here. At first CJ didn’t want to leave Steve’s side, but eventually realized he had other work to tend to, so he went to play in the lush green fields.
One of the first things he noticed on this farm was that he was mixed with nannies and billies and there was no separation of the two. Finally CJ could be with male goats, and not just be isolated with the females. This made him leap around the field in endless joy.
Over the next while CJ became friends with Steve. He really liked the way that Steve joked and teased him, and CJ would return the favour by seeing what mischief that he could cause for Steve. Steve took a personal liking to CJ, and made sure to visit with him every day.
CJ also began to learn things on the farm. One thing that shocked him was how the male goats seemed to be totally enthralled with challenging each others in head butting. When one was eventually the winner, he would go over and find him a nanny, and then would mount her from behind. This was all new to CJ, but he just didn’t understand the reasoning for all this to just go over to climb on top of a female. CJ would much prefer to not even have a female around. They seemed to be just missing something.
Eventually CJ began to butt heads with the other goats. Steve watched this with interest, as CJ never appeared to lose a competition, but once he won, he would always try to mount the losing goat. Unfortunately for CJ, Steve’s dad also noticed this as well.
Late one night, Steve came out into the field and located CJ. He went down on his knees and CJ could tell he was upset. Steve took off CJ’s sunglasses and looked him in the eyes. “CJ, I just overheard my dad, and he isn’t too happy with you right now. He has noticed that you don’t seem to be too interested in mating with the nannies, and since that is what he bought you for, he has decided that he might as well get some of his money back from the slaughter house.”
“Now if you don’t like females, I can tell you that I more than understand CJ” Steve explained.
“But I don’t want you to become some ones dinner either. I see a potential in you that I have never seen in any other goat in my life. Therefore, we are going to walk over to the back fence, and I’m going to lift you over the fence, and let you be free” Steve said with misty eyes.
Steve continued “But don’t hang around here. Run as far and fast as you can. Go somewhere where you can be yourself and do what you want. Be proud of yourself, and most of all, I will never forget you.”
Steve was now sobbing lightly as he led CJ to the back fence of the farm. With what seemed more of a hug, Steve lifted CJ up in his arms and placed him down on the other side of the fence. Lastly, he put the sunglasses back on CJ, just above the eyes so he could see.
“Run CJ. Run to be free. I will always miss you, and I’ll never forget you.” Steve exclaimed
Trusting Steve whole heartedly, CJ turned and began to run for his life. He entered a sparse forest and continued to run until he saw the sun coming up. He stopped by a stream to drink some water, and ate a bit of grass and lay down to sleep.
This was CJ’s existence for the next couple of months. Running everyday, and never looking back. He traveled across some sparse deserts, where water and food was not for days upon days.
Finally he reached an area that had some vegetation and trees, and appeared to be rugged mountains as well. Realizing the isolation of this location, CJ decided this was his new home.
Standing upon a cliff, looking across the vast horizon, CJ began to remember all the people that had a hand in bringing him here today. He still seethed anger for the farmers in Australia, Italy, and Dallas. He also realized that he had met some people that he would always be indebted to, Kevin and Steve. He reflected on how, if he would have just mated with the nannies how life would be much simpler? CJ had an idea on how he would exact his revenge, but it was just now a matter of implementing it. With a kick of a rock off the high cliff, an evil smile began to grow across his face.
‘Someday this world will be mine’ he thought.
that was great! 
Other Steve!
Sorry Ive been under the weather and attacking finals. If I interpret the story correctly are you blaming me for setting CJ loose on the world? 
Of course, some people would call it a mixed blessing. The goat does have his good points (and I'm not talking about his horns), even if you sometimes have to dig a bit to find them....
. The way I read it was you were faced with a choice of freeing CJ to the world or to make him somebody's dinner. You being the better human being showed compassion, understanding, and did the right thing instead of what may have been the popular thing 
.
Who? Me? 
.