Chapters 3 and 4 are posted !
No Fairytale World
Full Version: No Fairytale World
Great chapters!
Pete seems to be really struggling with something big. I can tell he's just dying to talk about it, but years of betrayal have probably forced him to be cautious. Every time he's on the verge of blurting it out, he stops himself.
And Andy seems amazingly nonjudgmental after catching Pete. Maybe that part requires a bit of suspension of disbelief, because even if Andy is not that judgmental, is it realistic to think that he'd want Pete to take that kind of thing home... to have strange men in the house? Especially when Andy knows he brings Jordan there? You'd think his protective instincts as a father would kick in, if nothing else.
The scene with Andy and his dad was really, really great. Well-written, very poignant and honest.
Keep up the story - it's a good one!
Pete seems to be really struggling with something big. I can tell he's just dying to talk about it, but years of betrayal have probably forced him to be cautious. Every time he's on the verge of blurting it out, he stops himself.
And Andy seems amazingly nonjudgmental after catching Pete. Maybe that part requires a bit of suspension of disbelief, because even if Andy is not that judgmental, is it realistic to think that he'd want Pete to take that kind of thing home... to have strange men in the house? Especially when Andy knows he brings Jordan there? You'd think his protective instincts as a father would kick in, if nothing else.
The scene with Andy and his dad was really, really great. Well-written, very poignant and honest.
Keep up the story - it's a good one!
QUOTE (Cynical Romantic @ August 2 2008, 11:54 AM) 
And Andy seems amazingly nonjudgmental after catching Pete. Maybe that part requires a bit of suspension of disbelief, because even if Andy is not that judgmental, is it realistic to think that he'd want Pete to take that kind of thing home... to have strange men in the house? Especially when Andy knows he brings Jordan there? You'd think his protective instincts as a father would kick in, if nothing else.
The scene with Andy and his dad was really, really great. Well-written, very poignant and honest.
Keep up the story - it's a good one!
The scene with Andy and his dad was really, really great. Well-written, very poignant and honest.
Keep up the story - it's a good one!
Thanks CR! I love your analysis and comments!
As for Andy's reaction to catching Pete, maybe it was the shock that made him so accepting. Or maybe he's so stressed with his own life that he doesn't have the energy to lay into Pete, especially if he knows virtually nothing about Pete.
But you're right in the sense that most people, with a clear head, would be very concerned about strange men coming in the house, especially with a young child visiting on weekends. However, since Pete isn't blatant about it, and it was a first time occurence, Andy's doesn't necessarily feel Jordan is in any danger. At least yet...
Thanks for reading and commenting.
QUOTE (Cynical Romantic @ August 2 2008, 05:54 PM)
Keep up the story - it's a good one!
I am pretty sure we will see new chapters posted on a regular basis
.
QUOTE (Cynical Romantic @ August 2 2008, 11:54 AM)
Great chapters!
Pete seems to be really struggling with something big. I can tell he's just dying to talk about it, but years of betrayal have probably forced him to be cautious. Every time he's on the verge of blurting it out, he stops himself.
And Andy seems amazingly nonjudgmental after catching Pete. Maybe that part requires a bit of suspension of disbelief, because even if Andy is not that judgmental, is it realistic to think that he'd want Pete to take that kind of thing home... to have strange men in the house? Especially when Andy knows he brings Jordan there? You'd think his protective instincts as a father would kick in, if nothing else.
The scene with Andy and his dad was really, really great. Well-written, very poignant and honest.
Keep up the story - it's a good one!
Pete seems to be really struggling with something big. I can tell he's just dying to talk about it, but years of betrayal have probably forced him to be cautious. Every time he's on the verge of blurting it out, he stops himself.
And Andy seems amazingly nonjudgmental after catching Pete. Maybe that part requires a bit of suspension of disbelief, because even if Andy is not that judgmental, is it realistic to think that he'd want Pete to take that kind of thing home... to have strange men in the house? Especially when Andy knows he brings Jordan there? You'd think his protective instincts as a father would kick in, if nothing else.
The scene with Andy and his dad was really, really great. Well-written, very poignant and honest.
Keep up the story - it's a good one!
I have to agree, wonder it's also because of his moodyness? About Pete bringing him his "clients" isn't safe for him or anyone else. wonder about pete's history, hopeflly he'll open himself up to Andy or even mark
Somehow Andy must still see something in Pete for Jordan to be around him.
QUOTE (Drewbie @ August 5 2008, 05:46 PM)
I have to agree, wonder it's also because of his moodyness? About Pete bringing him his "clients" isn't safe for him or anyone else. wonder about pete's history, hopeflly he'll open himself up to Andy or even mark
Somehow Andy must still see something in Pete for Jordan to be around him.
Somehow Andy must still see something in Pete for Jordan to be around him.
Pete bringing home clients is definitely not safe for him or anyone else. But then again, Andy didn't know what to make of it initially. I think for Andy, confrontation is not something he could handle at the moment, which is why he lets it go...at first. Plus, Pete is not bringing home guys blatantly, and definitely not when Jordan is around. Most likely, he meets up with his clients at other locations, with this time being the exception.
Thanks for reading and commenting Drewbie.
QUOTE (Tiff @ August 6 2008, 02:41 PM)
Pete bringing home clients is definitely not safe for him or anyone else. But then again, Andy didn't know what to make of it initially. I think for Andy, confrontation is not something he could handle at the moment, which is why he lets it go...at first. Plus, Pete is not bringing home guys blatantly, and definitely not when Jordan is around. Most likely, he meets up with his clients at other locations, with this time being the exception.
Thanks for reading and commenting Drewbie.
Thanks for reading and commenting Drewbie.
Right, Didn't of andy just not wanting a confrontation.
Wow! Great chapters!
I have to say the big shocker was definitely finding out about Pete's sideline. I'm really worried about him 'swallowing' with a strange man like that!
At least not yet?
What are you planning to do Jordan!?
On another note, that father/son chat in chapter 3 was awesome!
Can't wait to read the next chapter! (and as it happens I can go and do just that
)
-Kevin
I have to say the big shocker was definitely finding out about Pete's sideline. I'm really worried about him 'swallowing' with a strange man like that!
QUOTE (Tiff @ August 2 2008, 03:28 PM)
Thanks CR! I love your analysis and comments!
As for Andy's reaction to catching Pete, maybe it was the shock that made him so accepting. Or maybe he's so stressed with his own life that he doesn't have the energy to lay into Pete, especially if he knows virtually nothing about Pete.
But you're right in the sense that most people, with a clear head, would be very concerned about strange men coming in the house, especially with a young child visiting on weekends. However, since Pete isn't blatant about it, and it was a first time occurence, Andy's doesn't necessarily feel Jordan is in any danger. At least yet...
Thanks for reading and commenting.
As for Andy's reaction to catching Pete, maybe it was the shock that made him so accepting. Or maybe he's so stressed with his own life that he doesn't have the energy to lay into Pete, especially if he knows virtually nothing about Pete.
But you're right in the sense that most people, with a clear head, would be very concerned about strange men coming in the house, especially with a young child visiting on weekends. However, since Pete isn't blatant about it, and it was a first time occurence, Andy's doesn't necessarily feel Jordan is in any danger. At least yet...
Thanks for reading and commenting.
At least not yet?
What are you planning to do Jordan!?
On another note, that father/son chat in chapter 3 was awesome!
Can't wait to read the next chapter! (and as it happens I can go and do just that
)-Kevin
QUOTE (AFriendlyFace @ August 13 2008, 12:54 AM)
Wow! Great chapters!
I have to say the big shocker was definitely finding out about Pete's sideline. I'm really worried about him 'swallowing' with a strange man like that!
I have to say the big shocker was definitely finding out about Pete's sideline. I'm really worried about him 'swallowing' with a strange man like that!
I have to say that it was probably a huge shocker for Andy as well. I'm glad it was a huge shock. I wanted it to be. I didn't want to drop any hints in earlier chapters because it would spoil the effect.
Thanks for reading/commenting.
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