comicfan Posted February 16, 2012 Posted February 16, 2012 The Haiku is a Japanese poetry form. In English we usually use a 5, 7, 5 syllable line. The Haiku usually focuses on some aspect of nature and ends with a surprise. With that in mind try writing at least one of your own. Here is one of mine as an example. I hear the screaming And run to find him pointing At a spider. Squish. Modern American Haiku's have taken the poetry form and converted it keeping the syllable line but now taking the idea and using it to tell long stories in a series of Haiku. Take this opportunity to write at least one of your own.
Former Member Posted February 17, 2012 Posted February 17, 2012 I waken to rain pattering on my window, long drive to nowhere.
Site Administrator Cia Posted February 17, 2012 Site Administrator Posted February 17, 2012 I waken to rain pattering on my window, long drive to nowhere. Then scream . . . as you run off the road and slam into a storm whipped tree! LOL. Don't ask me why, I got this image of a sleepy person driving in a storm late at night and dozing off, then running off the road in the middle of the sticks. Great job!
Site Administrator Cia Posted February 17, 2012 Site Administrator Posted February 17, 2012 Her path decided Journey of preservation She hides inside us Gaze at crystal eyes Travel the opaque surface Hiding the soul safe She waits without hope So sad waiting for our love To once again appear It is lonely there Left with the path incomplete Surface etched in pain Blight spreads through neglect Barren she stays until then Tears all she has left *** I don't know if that is what Comic meant by a story, but that is what came to me. I don't do poetry for a reason, but I figured, it's a prompt and supposed to stretch my mental skills, right? It is so much easier to write a story than hint at it through poetical prose. Feel free to let me know what you think, because honestly I have no clue if readers will get it.
Dolores Esteban Posted February 17, 2012 Posted February 17, 2012 I love both answers to the prompt. Very beautiful lines.
Former Member Posted February 18, 2012 Posted February 18, 2012 Her path decided Journey of preservation She hides inside us Gaze at crystal eyes Travel the opaque surface Hiding the soul safe She waits without hope So sad waiting for our love To once again appear It is lonely there Left with the path incomplete Surface etched in pain Blight spreads through neglect Barren she stays until then Tears all she has left *** I don't know if that is what Comic meant by a story, but that is what came to me. I don't do poetry for a reason, but I figured, it's a prompt and supposed to stretch my mental skills, right? It is so much easier to write a story than hint at it through poetical prose. Feel free to let me know what you think, because honestly I have no clue if readers will get it. I really like the structure of this: it seems like every two stanzas are related, but only through "twist-logic" to the following two stanzas, and the last one stands alone. It seems to magnify the effect of a shorter haiku, which definitely makes things easier. As for subject matter... Didn't want to ruin other people's guesses, but it seems like a young woman with health complications navigating a serious relationship. As far as story haiku though, I much prefer the Renga format (several sources online) than linked haiku; renga gives more wiggle room to finish ideas before the next one comes up. Also thank you for the kind words. :-D
comicfan Posted February 19, 2012 Author Posted February 19, 2012 I waken to rain pattering on my window, long drive to nowhere. a night of insomnia where the drive helps to relax you? Anyway I enjoyed the images. Her path decided Journey of preservation She hides inside us Gaze at crystal eyes Travel the opaque surface Hiding the soul safe She waits without hope So sad waiting for our love To once again appear It is lonely there Left with the path incomplete Surface etched in pain Blight spreads through neglect Barren she stays until then Tears all she has left *** I don't know if that is what Comic meant by a story, but that is what came to me. I don't do poetry for a reason, but I figured, it's a prompt and supposed to stretch my mental skills, right? It is so much easier to write a story than hint at it through poetical prose. Feel free to let me know what you think, because honestly I have no clue if readers will get it. Cia, that is the one nice thing about the prompts, you can take them however you wish. lol. As for your haiku it is open to interpretation. Personally I see it as someone abused who hides herself away while she recovers.
comicfan Posted February 19, 2012 Author Posted February 19, 2012 Okay, I did this as well. Be warned it is dark. https://www.gayauthors.org/story/comicfan/thepromptyousay/4
Dolores Esteban Posted February 19, 2012 Posted February 19, 2012 (edited) I liked this one also. This is what I like about poetry, you can tell a whole story with only few words. You can leave out all that is redundant, can come straight to the core and yet touch on the whole range of emotions. Edited February 19, 2012 by Dolores Esteban 1
JOeKEool Posted February 21, 2012 Posted February 21, 2012 Here's mine. This was totally different. Thanks,Wayne. Another good one. PROMPT # 112_HAIKU
EmDee Posted February 24, 2012 Posted February 24, 2012 I've never been much good at writing poetry, the only time I ever attempted to was for school assignments. But I decided to give this prompt a chance, so here it is... https://www.gayauthors.org/story/EmDee/emsgapromptstories/2
JamesSavik Posted February 24, 2012 Posted February 24, 2012 Civilization is transitory There is a beast inside man Released it destroys
comicfan Posted February 25, 2012 Author Posted February 25, 2012 Hmm. Civilization is transitory There is a beast inside man Released it destroys James, you always seem to find the darkness. That was powerful.
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