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would you ever date your ex again?


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My ex has moved back and has asked me a few times to go out and catch up, and i've said no each time... so guess i'm wondering if any of you would give an ex a second chance?

Edited by mattster
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Like Zaf said, it all depends. If you broke up 'cause neither of you were that interested anymore, and it's been a while and the interest is there again, then why not? Then again, if it was because of a reason like K.C.'s, then I have to agree with 'Hell NO!!!!' :lol:

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Whether or not they get another shot depends on which one and why I dumped him in the first place.

 

For instance... the ever drunk guy that calls me drunk and horny at 2 am... not so much. Anyway... he would just fall asleep. :thumbdown:

 

The guy that got promoted and transfered to the D.C. office... getting warmer. :lmao:  Much, much warmer!

 

It's an easy game. See how it is played? ;)

Edited by jamessavik
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I have gotten together with exes over coffee to catch up on old times. The only way I would consider dating again, though, is if the relationship ended because one moved because of job, education or family issues. After all, there is a reason they are exes, but they could become friends.

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Like a lot of people said, it would depend on the reason. With one of my exes I would, not the other.  My impression is that people don't change terribly much unless they really work at it, so if there was lots of lying and cheating and fighting and yelling, then no. 

 

And if you're still in pain from whatever happened, then would you be going into it with an open mind? I think that depends on the individual also.

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I married the first guy I 'officially' dated at 16, so I don't have experience with this either. I recently had the guy I'd 'unofficially' dated before that find me on Facebook and that was weird enough. I guess, as many folks have said in this topic, it all depends on how and why you broke up.  

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I have. Most of the time the problems that broke you up in the first place, are still there. The more baggage a relationship has coming into it, the more likely it will overshadow everything else as well.

 

People do change though. If what happened during the first relationship is something that can be put aside for another try, then I don't see a problem in trying again. If it can't be easily forgotten about, then I wouldn't.

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Slightly off topic, but related, my current, long term ( 15 years) was really concerned about his exes. He was never going back there ( there were three of them) but I have met each of them which, 1) made my husband a lot more relaxed and 2) gave me some real insight into his "type". So back to the a would he date any of them? 1) over my dead body, 2) if I am a dead body highly unlikely!!! Talk about recognizing and enjoying the past but happy to leave it there, he just isn't that bloke any more. 

 

So date an ex if it is recent enough to pick things up happily where they left off, otherwise, leave the past to history, move on and enjoy!

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What do you mean, date?

 

Dinner and talk to catch up? Probably, if we parted on good terms. Meet up to enjoy a common interest? Maybe.

 

But you can't go back in time. We're no longer together for a reason, and since I just celebrated my 24th anniversary, I'm not throwing that away to chase a shadow of a memory.

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I have, repetitively (as Mann can confirm for me, since he normally picks up the pieces - sorry about that :P )

It didnt change much... it was a car crash the first time we broke up, and the second, the third, the fourth... You get the impression.

 

Eventually it got to the point that the Encyclopedia Britannica was being used as a projectile, and we realised we brought out the worst in each other. It ended and we havent been in contact since, except for the occasional bumping into each other if he is here to see friends. I did, however, get punched by his NEW girlfriend who accused me of still seeing him behind her back. Impressive, not only because he lives in Spain now and im in Wales, but also because the sight of the guy is the biggest turn off you can imagine.

 

So no - learn from my mistakes, and dont touch with a 50ft barge pole. 

Edited by Never Surrender
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The only advice I can give you, which is the same advice my best friend gave to me when I finally got out of my first real relationship is : You need to remember why you broke up in the first place and knowing that will normally help you make the right decision :)

 

I hope it works out for you whatever you decide. But remember, no matter how much advice you get given, only you know the answer deep down :)

  • Like 1
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I did, and we still get together occasionally for a booty call. :P

 

But, we aren't well suited for anything more than an evening together once in a while, because he's freaking nuts and I am the most stable, reliable, trustworthy, gorgeous and wonderful person who's ever lived, and I don't have ANY issues.

 

IT WAS ALL HIS FAULT

  • Like 5
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  • 2 weeks later...

My ex has moved back and has asked me a few times to go out and catch up, and i've said no each time... so guess i'm wondering if any of you would give an ex a second chance?

Yes -- I did it a couple of times when I was still in college. Both times it started out good -- but didn't last long. I think it depends on what caused the breakup. I hate to say it, but there's no getting around certain problems. I personally can't handle cheating! On the up side, I did manage to salvage a least one really good friendship that has lasted to this day. Some people are worth a second chance.

 

Maxx

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