The Wild Imagination of Childhood

[Cynus]

I was remembering some of the weird things I used to believe as a kid, and I ended up laughing in public.
 

For example, I remember that I used to believe that movies were always real, and that the camera crews happened to be there to catch the events as they happened. The specific movie where I finally started to question that logic was "The Great Escape" with Steve McQueen. At first I thought it was awesome that the German soldiers had allowed the cameras in to record the prisoners, and that the prisoners had trusted them and let them film their escape plans. I kept believing that this was true until my mother told me the year that Steve McQueen died and I did the math and realized how old he must have been if he had also been in the war in Germany(My grandpa was a war buff so I learned the dates of World War II at an early age). When I told my mother that he must have been really old she told me that he had actually died pretty young and then gave me his age. 

That's when I learned that Steve McQueen was never in a prisoner of war camp. The cameras had fooled me. Sadly, that also meant that some of the magic died for me(Like when I thought The Princess Bride had actually happened and they had recorded the events as they unfolded) but I guess it's better to live in reality, right? 

What things did you believe in your childhood that you now realize are completely ridiculous?

[methodwriter85]

When I was a little kid, I thought sex meant rolling around under your bed covers naked, because of the episodes of Melrose Place that I watched as a 7-year old. I  didn't realize what sex actually was until I was 9 and saw The Miracle of Life on PBS. I NEVER got the sex talk from my parents.

 

I also thought that if I could spin around fast enough, I could time-travel.

Edited April 20, 2015 by methodwriter85

[JamesSavik]

When I was a little kid, I thought sex meant rolling around under your bed covers naked...

 

You mean it's NOT!?

 

But seriously folks- I call it spawning because it involves lots of flopping around gasping for breath.

 

HEhehehe- I'm here all week folks. The 7 o'clock and the 9 o'clock shows are completely different!

[Cia]

Being a parent means you get all sorts of funny stories, especially about private parts because it makes so many people uncomfortable or anxious. Plus you have to consider discretion and what is and isn't appropriate and understandable for different ages. Still, it can result in hilarious concepts in their minds. My son had the oddest one about testicles at the age of 3-4.

 

 

Son asked his dad one day, in the shower, "What are testicles for?"

 

Dad said, "They're for helping mommies having babies when you're a grown up."

 

Son bent over and eyeballed his testicle (he only has one from a birth defect issue) and said, "I hope mine's a boy!"    

 

Dad snorted and said, "They're not eggs or anything! You can have more than one kid, boys or girls."

 

Son makes an 'Oh, okay' face and drops the subject.

 

 

Yes. Sex ed talks with the very young--always amusing! Of course, a teenage friend of the family, my oldest stepsister, and I convinced my (18 months older than me) sister that when she hit puberty she'd stop growing completely the day she started her first cycle. Considering she hadn't even hit five feet yet--she was devastated.   So gullible, and she was 10!!

[DynoReads]

When I was little, maybe 4 or 5, a new bathroom cleaning product was advertised with animated scrubbing bubbles. I finally convinced my dad to buy a can, and wasted the whole thing looking for the scrubbing bubbles.

 

Around the same time my younger sister, who might have been 2 and I got in a fight over my dolls. She got mad and bit me so hard it drew blood. I was convinced she was a vampire, and couldn't sleep in the same room with her without a red nightlight until I was about 12 or 13. Dad told me the red light would trick her vampire into thinking the sun hadn't set yet, so it wouldn't come out.

 

When my son was 5, he didn't want to sleep in his own room because of monsters under his bed. I told him he didn't need to worry about any monsters under the bed because the cat had eaten all of them. To this day, he's fine if we have a cat, when we don't he's afraid of the monsters in the dark or under the bed.

Edited April 24, 2015 by DynoReads

[Drew Espinosa]

When I was a kid, I believe babies were born out of the belly-button When my mom told me this, I thought: Whoa! How did I come out of that?!

[Valkyrie]

When I was a kid, we drove by the portion of the Niagara River that has the rapids.  I thought my parents were saying 'rabbits' and had no idea why rabbits would cause the water to look like that.  I still think of rabbits whenever I hear people talk about rapids. lol

[Cynus]

When I was a kid, we drove by the portion of the Niagara River that has the rapids.  I thought my parents were saying 'rabbits' and had no idea why rabbits would cause the water to look like that.  I still think of rabbits whenever I hear people talk about rapids. lol

Riding the rabbits.

 

[echophase]

I used to think that space camp was where they actually sent you up to space, I thought my mum was such a monster for not letting me go ... I'd have been a great astronaut ...