There does not appear to be a method of reviewing the entire book at once, so this review should be noted as just that, not only for the first chapter.
The first chapter is probably the best one though, as the dialogue is the most realistic and there is more action to describe as opposed to emotions. As the book progresses the dialogue becomes less age appropriate and somewhat stilted at times. Real 14 year olds don't talk like this. Or think like Trevor appears to either. Nonetheless, it's much better than most of the stories on Nifty.
The writing is done well enough that the reader quickly develops a liking and compassion for Trevor however and cares what happens to him.
The sex is quite explicit using the usual hack phrases for the oral and anal sex activities - no originality there. But while having no problem describing the acts in detail and using the words dick, pussy and hole, the author curiously has some problem with fuck and cunt. He uses them, but "sanitizes" the words using asterisks in the middle two spaces. It's odd, out of place and annoying in such a story. Better to have used euphemisms.
One very pleasing aspect was the almost complete absence of spelling, grammar or punctuation errors, despite the avowed non-use of editors or beta readers. Kudos on that.
Overall rating 3/5 for the story.  4-24-2013