Jump to content
    AC Benus
  • Author
  • 157 Words
  • 820 Views
  • 8 Comments
Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

Twenty-Two Early Poems - 6. Ashes

.

Poem No. 16

 

Ashes

 

I looked down into my tea

And what do you think I happened to see?

Ashes, ashes in my tea.

They sit, they bob, they float and stare

They prance about and put on airs

Those ashes

Ashes in my tea.

The renewal of life, the hatred of death

Everyone sighs in deep regret

Except those ashes

Ashes in my tea.

 

 

Poem No. 17

 

I sloshed through the slush looking for a Raison

A perfectly plum, sweet, Raison

Smooth and tender, to warm against the cold

I struggle through, seeking the Raison of gold.

 

 

Poem No. 18

 

I wish I could fall into a sleep so deep

As to relinquish life's belief –

For mediocrity haunts me so.

 

I into a gentle spiral fall

Downward, as a leaf to Autumn's call –

Like my heartbeat, methodically slow.

 

 

_

Copyright © 2017 AC Benus; All Rights Reserved.
  • Like 7
Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 
You are not currently following this story. Be sure to follow to keep up to date with new chapters.

Recommended Comments

Chapter Comments


AC, more great poetry, though the last two speak to me more than the first.
And again I had to look up raison... but i'm glad i did... 17 is wonderful!
No. 18, is sad ... quite suicidal, at least that's what it says to me. And mediocrity, I think is why a lot of people choose that option.
Having had the opportunity to get to know you a little bit AC, I'd say mediocrity is something you dislike in yourself - it shows in your writing.
I like these older works of yours.. flashes of the writer you will become....

tim

  • Like 1
Link to comment
On 10/05/2015 07:25 AM, Mikiesboy said:

AC, more great poetry, though the last two speak to me more than the first.

And again I had to look up raison... but i'm glad i did... 17 is wonderful!

No. 18, is sad ... quite suicidal, at least that's what it says to me. And mediocrity, I think is why a lot of people choose that option.

Having had the opportunity to get to know you a little bit AC, I'd say mediocrity is something you dislike in yourself - it shows in your writing.

I like these older works of yours.. flashes of the writer you will become....

tim

Thank you, Tim. First year of college I was truly lonely and felt isolated. For some reason that feeling would come on the strongest during breakfast. I had 4 days a week where my first classes started at 8:30, and the café would be abandoned at that time.

 

Nos. 16 and 17 were both written while I sat alone, still half-sleep and very depressed in the empty cafeteria in the morning.

 

Your interpretation on what no. 18 is about is spot on….

 

Thanks for the insightful review, Tim….appreciate it

Link to comment

A bit sad these, but lovely to read nevertheless. I did think depression and loneliness, and you and Tim confirmed that.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
On 10/05/2015 08:03 AM, Defiance19 said:

A bit sad these, but lovely to read nevertheless. I did think depression and loneliness, and you and Tim confirmed that.

Thank you, Defiance19! I appreciate your review and ongoing support!

Link to comment

#18 resonates... it is sad and quite beautiful... a moment of melancholy and introspection is what I got from it... cheers... Gary...

  • Like 1
Link to comment

When reading No. 16 for the first time, the phrase "ashes to ashes, dust to dust" bubbles up, giving a mindset for grieve and sadness. But ashes have positive aspects as well. The foundation for new growth and even the harbinger of sustained life - be it six weeks later. So the mindset changes to one of happy survival.

 

I loved the first line of no. 17. Pronounced it and discovered gymnastics for the tongue !
The Raison of gold is like the pot with the same precious metal, we seek, but will not find. The seeking itself is the Raison.

 

I'll let no. 18 sleep, as I cannot add anything that isn't said yet. A beauty.

 

Thanks again, AC.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
On 10/05/2015 03:56 PM, Headstall said:

#18 resonates... it is sad and quite beautiful... a moment of melancholy and introspection is what I got from it... cheers... Gary...

Thank you, Gary. I like your experience with No. 18, it's lovely. Thanks for the review, I appreciate it!

Link to comment
On 10/06/2015 05:43 AM, J.HunterDunn said:

When reading No. 16 for the first time, the phrase "ashes to ashes, dust to dust" bubbles up, giving a mindset for grieve and sadness. But ashes have positive aspects as well. The foundation for new growth and even the harbinger of sustained life - be it six weeks later. So the mindset changes to one of happy survival.

 

I loved the first line of no. 17. Pronounced it and discovered gymnastics for the tongue !

The Raison of gold is like the pot with the same precious metal, we seek, but will not find. The seeking itself is the Raison.

 

I'll let no. 18 sleep, as I cannot add anything that isn't said yet. A beauty.

 

Thanks again, AC.

Thank you, Peter, for a beautiful review. You make me smile to think about your gymnastics for the tongue, and I loved the pot of gold analogy.

 

As for the experiences you had with the poems, I really appreciate you sharing. Your take on No. 16 is particularly engaging; thank you!

Link to comment
View Guidelines

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Newsletter

    Sign Up and get an occasional Newsletter.  Fill out your profile with favorite genres and say yes to genre news to get the monthly update for your favorite genres.

    Sign Up
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Our Privacy Policy can be found here: Privacy Policy. We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue..