Love in a Chair by Altimexis

1. Confusion

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Disclaimer: This story is a personal exploration of the challenges and triumphs experienced by gay teens with disabilities. Some of the descriptions of sex may be graphic but, hopefully, in good taste. This story is under copyright. It is purely a work of fiction and any resemblance of characters to real people is completely coincidental. In most areas, one needs to be at least eighteen to read it and in some areas it may be illegal to read stories involving sex between minors, no matter how well intentioned they may be.

This story contains considerably more sex than is typical of my other stories, and descriptions of sexual acts are definitely a lot more graphic. Although at times the sex may seem to be gratuitous, all sexual content is presented with a purpose in mind and it is by no means intended to condone frequent sexual activity between minors. On the contrary, the author believes that the emotions of love, sexual energy and teenage angst are things that are better explored gradually over time and not simultaneously. Still, few of us can choose when we fall in love, and occasionally some of us are lucky to meet the “love of our life” at half the age that others do.

READERS SHOULD NOTE that this is not a story about eroticism gained through urination or scat. In fact, descriptions throughout the following chapters related to bowel and bladder movements, are described for the purpose of giving the reader an insight into the complications, embarrassments, and adjustments required in the everyday life of a paraplegic.

Dedication: This story is dedicated to the memory of Dyllain “Dylls” “Dylly” Czaac -Taylor, who succumbed to a lengthy illness and his injuries on August 28, 2007. Although only sixteen, he faced more challenges than most of us will face in a lifetime. More importantly, he found true love. I am touched that he found something special in my writing, and that I touched his short life. May we all find inspiration in the way he lived his life.

Chapter 1 - Confusion

Aaron sat on his bed looking pensively at his room. It was a very gloomy day outside with a mixture of heavy rain and sleet that cast a pall over the whole room. The icy late November weather merely mirrored the mood he felt inside. In all his 15 years, he’d never really doubted himself. Sure, middle school had been hell and the teasing was relentless, but he’d come through it and even felt he was somewhat popular. But he never doubted who he was. Thinking back, though, he realized that he always thought of himself as an outsider - someone who just never seemed to belong.

High school had been a real eye-opener. What worked in middle school only made him feel out of place now that he was a “real” teenager. Yeah, he was growing up and his friends were too. He could get away with making friends in middle school by acting goofy and playing along, but now things were much more serious. Sure, getting along was largely an act, but there were expectations that just didn’t sit well with Aaron. Most of his friends were dating and many had girlfriends. A few guys he knew were openly gay, and although they had to put up with a lot of teasing and even more serious abuse, most people accepted them for who they were. Aaron liked girls, but he just didn’t feel comfortable with them. His mom told him that this was normal - he was just shy - but he felt otherwise. Oh, he got excited thinking about having sex with girls, but he just didn’t think about girls much. He never really paid much attention to them. Some of his friends told him that girls thought he was cute, but he sure didn’t see what they saw in him. In ninth grade he always seemed to be surrounded by girls and only later did he realize that they were probably trying to hit on him. By the time he was a sophomore, they just seemed to have given up on him. 'Funny', he thought to himself, 'I didn’t miss all that attention until it wasn’t there.'

But the troubling thing is though he thought he liked girls, his dick kept telling him otherwise. Sometimes he found himself just staring at a really cute guy and suddenly turning away and blushing when the guy looked back at him. Aaron just didn’t feel gay. The thought of sucking someone’s dick actually seemed repulsive and he couldn’t imagine sticking his dick up someone’s ass or taking it in the ass. But, when he jacked off, he wasn’t thinking about girls. He wasn’t thinking about boys in particular either. Mostly he thought of generic nudist fantasies, but increasingly there were other boys who were also nude in his fantasies. This troubled him greatly. Let’s face it, he didn’t want to be gay, but deep inside he was coming to the conclusion that he probably was. But then, if he was gay, why didn’t the openly gay kids in school turn him on? The boys he really liked couldn’t possibly be gay - he was certain of that - and that made him very depressed.


“Yeah, Mom,” he replied.

“We’re going out to a movie tonight. Would you like to go with us?”

Aaron really didn’t feel like going out. It was a cold, bleak day and it would be a cold, bleak night. He was depressed and he really didn’t want to leave his room. Besides which, teenage boys just shouldn’t be seen in public with their parents. Going to the movies with his parents would almost be an admission that he had no friends to hang out with. But what good was it to just mope in his room? And he really liked his parents - they were cool and treated him more like an adult than a kid.

“What movie are you going to?” he asked.

“War of the Worlds.”

Hmm, Tom Cruise was in that one and he really liked looking at Tom Cruise. “OK, Mom, I’ll go.”

“Dinner’s almost ready - you’d better wash up if you’re going with us.”

“OK, Mom,” he replied. He didn’t want to get up. He didn’t feel like getting up, but finally he got the willpower to move and made his way across the hall to the bathroom.

Aaron looked at himself in the bathroom mirror. What made people think he was cute? His hair was a very basic brown, and it was wavy - neither curly nor straight. Hmm, he thought with some amusement - bisexual hair. His nose seemed too narrow and long, and a little bit crooked, and his mouth was too wide for his face. And scattered around his face were a few zits - nothing major, but no matter how hard he washed and how much stuff he put on them, they were always there. He took off his shirt and looked at his body. His chest was completely devoid of hair - God, some kids in his class had thick bushes on their chest. His pecs weren’t well defined and his abdomen didn’t exactly sport a six-pack. His nipples were dark and in the chill of the cold bathroom, very firm. In fact, feeling of the cold air on his chest was making him aroused. He opened his zipper, pulled his dick out and watched it grow. Even fully erect, he was only 5 inches - nothing to write home about. It wasn’t very thick, but it was cut and at least his head was well defined.

He wrapped his hand around his member and started to stroke. As he did, he imagined that the air on his chest was cold because he was running naked through a lush green forest. The cold air felt good against his chest and his dick slapped freely on his thighs as he ran. He ran out into a clearing and the sun shone down upon his body. He came to a stream and walked into it, enjoying the feel of cold water running across his bare feet, sending shivers up and down his spine. But then he spotted another boy just a little farther downstream. The boy was beautiful - there was no other word to describe him. He was blond, smooth and young - perhaps only thirteen or fourteen. And on top of it all, he was naked! Aaron didn’t know why the boy was naked, but then it didn’t make any sense why he was naked either - this was fantasy, after all.

Aaron was afraid the boy would spot him, so he slowly made his way back into the forest, crouching down slowly as he tried not to make a sound, but he never took his eyes off the boy. The boy stood with his feet in the stream and he had his hands on his hips, thrusting his chest and pelvis forward just enjoying the feel of the sunshine on his bare skin. And he had a gorgeous light tan and his dick was hard! Aaron marveled at the beauty of his penis. It was sticking up at a 45-degree angle and throbbing with each beat of the boy’s heart, just as Aaron’s was.

Suddenly the boy turned his face toward Aaron and he smiled slyly. They didn’t make eye contact at all - it was more as if the boy was saying, ‘I know you’re out there and this show is for you.’ The boy took his right hand off his hip, grasped his dick and slowly and sensually started to stroke it. He started stroking faster and faster as Aaron watched with excitement. Suddenly the boy’s dick exploded, sending jet after jet of thick white cum out into the stream. Aaron felt his own orgasm building. His balls drew up tight and his dick pulsed, spewing thick ropes of cum into the bathroom sink before trailing off to a few dribbles. Slowly Aaron returned to reality. He rinsed his cum down the drain - he liked doing it at the sink - no muss, no fuss. Yeah, he was a bit of a neat freak, too.

He felt his chin and it was still pretty smooth. He’d only recently started shaving and was a bit disappointed there wasn’t more stubble there since his shave yesterday morning. He quickly washed his face, combed his hair and put on a clean shirt. He bounded down the stairs and practically leapt into his chair, ruffling his younger brother’s hair on the way.

“Don’t be such a dork, Aaron.”

“Takes one to know one, squirt.”

Adam was a couple years younger than Aaron, but he looked nearly as old. They were nearly the same height, both being about five-foot, ten-inches tall, and Adam was perhaps even heavier and definitely more muscular. At thirteen, he was already dating and had a close circle of friends - something Aaron desperately wished he had.

“You going to the movies, too, squirt?”

“Yeah I am, but not with you, shitface!”

“Adam!” their father said with emphasis.

“Sorry, Dad.” Adam never liked it when Aaron called him ‘squirt’. He turned back to face his brother and said, “I’m meeting up with some of my friends when we get there.”

Aaron should have known. It bothered him terribly that he didn’t have the kinds of friends he liked to hang with. He had friends, but they never seemed to invite him to anything. So he was going with his parents to the movies - a fate almost worse than death. Aaron realized that his brother made him jealous. But it wasn’t just that. His brother was so “normal.” His brother was a great athlete, he was self-assured and he wasn’t at all shy. And Aaron had to admit that his brother was hot as hell. He had beautiful, piercing green eyes that could melt your heart. Aaron loved his brother and even had to admit that he was just a little bit turned on by him. This really repulsed him - it made him feel like such a pervert - but he sometimes just couldn’t help staring at him.

Earlier that day, Adam had caught him at it. Aaron was lying on his bed reading an assignment, when Adam ran out of his own room and in to the bathroom they shared, which was directly across the hall from both of their bedrooms. Adam had whipped out his dick and started to piss without shutting the door. It was only the two of them up there, so what was the harm? But Aaron just had to look and he kept looking as Adam let his stream loose, shook his dick, zipped up his pants and turned back toward him.

“Watcha staring at, you perv?” Adam shouted at him, but then their eyes met and Adam just stared back at him and started to smile. At that moment Aaron knew that his brother knew. Adam knew that his brother liked to look at dicks, and he could have said something about it, but he didn’t, and that was even more chilling to Aaron. His brother knew his darkest secret!

“We better get going,” his dad said as he grabbed the car keys, snapping Aaron out of his melancholy. They all grabbed their winter coats and piled into their VW Jetta - his parents were such environmentalists. Aaron cared about the environment very much, but he and his brother were way too tall to sit comfortably in the back seat. Usually they each sat diagonally with their legs crossing over each other’s, but not tonight. Adam sat straight with his knees practically against his chest. When Aaron started to stretch out, Adam gave him a piercing look that said, ‘Don’t even think it, you perv.’ That really hurt Aaron deeply, even more than if he’d said it aloud.

When they got to the movies, they all scampered inside to get warm while Aaron’s dad stood in line to pay. As soon as they had their tickets, Adam ran ahead and joined up with his friends, who were already there. Aaron watched Adam join the crowd, reach out and put his arms around a girl from behind. She turned and a broad smile took over her face as Adam tilted his head and they gave each other a brief kiss on the lips. Aaron blushed and his mother said, “Isn’t that sweet?”

He just looked around aimlessly at the typical suburban multiplex with its concession stands, food court and video arcade. Something caught his eye, however, as he scanned the lobby and it made him do a double take. Perched at one of the pinball machines was a blond kid - it was difficult to make out the details under his winter coat - but he was a dead ringer for the boy in his recent jerk-off fantasy! He couldn’t help but stare. Then one of the kids in the group Adam was with called out, “Hey Brian, better give it up, man. The movie’s gonna start.” The kid at the pinball machine shrugged his shoulders, turned away and ran to catch up.

The movie itself wasn’t all that great. The special effects were cool and Tom Cruise was cute, as always, but the plot didn’t hold together very well. And Aaron’s mind was elsewhere during the whole movie. He just couldn’t stop thinking about that kid! Every time he thought about his long, blond hair and his hips seductively swaying back and forth as he played pinball, Aaron couldn’t help but get a raging hard-on. When he and his parents walked out of the theater, his brother and his friends were already out in the lobby. They’d seen a different movie and were already sitting at tables in the food court, laughing and appearing to have a good time. And the boy was there! Aaron’s mom called out, “Adam, we’re ready to go home now,” as they approached the group.

Adam turned around to face his mother and asked, “Can’t I just stay a while with my friends? Jenny’s parents’ll give me a ride home.” Of course Aaron heard none of this. As soon as his mom called out, the kid turned around to look at them. He was absolutely perfect! Truly he was the boy of Aaron’s dreams. His face was tall and thin with a perfectly proportioned nose. His skin was lightly tanned, apparently showing the last traces of what must have been a deep summer tan. His eyes were an absolutely piercing, beautiful blue, and he had a captivating smile.

Then it hit him - not only was he staring at the kid, but the kid was staring back! They both seemed to realize it at the same time as they turned their faces quickly away - too quickly. Aaron could feel his face on fire, but with his gaze averted, he didn’t see that the other kid was also blushing. He felt so embarrassed - he knew the other kids must have seen him staring. And his parents! But if they did, they didn’t say anything on the way home. His brother didn’t go with them, so he assumed he must have talked his parents into letting him get a ride with someone else.

When he got home, he just flopped onto his bed and lay there for a long time. The rain had changed over to snow, but the wind outside was still howling, sending a chill through his young body. His mind was elsewhere, however. He just couldn’t get his mind off that kid! He kept seeing his face, his gorgeous face. Those beautiful eyes. That sweet smile. Those lips that he wanted to kiss. But why would he want to kiss his lips? Maybe he really was gay, after all. No boy had ever turned him on before - at least not that way - but neither had any girl. He felt so confused, but still he felt captivated, and his dick just wouldn’t go down.

“He goes to your school, you know.”

Aaron looked up, completely startled. He hadn’t heard his brother come home. He hadn’t even heard him come up the stairs. His mind was just elsewhere, and now he finally saw his brother standing outside his bedroom door with his head peering in.

“Huh?” was all Aaron could muster.

“Brian’s a freshman at your school. We were both in band together last year.” Then Adam looked around the corner behind him, turned back to Aaron and said very quietly, “And he’s gay, too. But like you, he just doesn’t know it yet.” Adam smiled broadly and walked away.

Aaron’s jaw dropped. What was his brother saying? Was his younger brother actually trying to fix him up?


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

2. Awakenings

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 2 - Awakenings

A couple weeks of had passed since Aaron and Brian’s fateful encounter. Just about every night Aaron found himself jerking off while thinking about him, and some mornings, too. He just couldn’t keep his mind off him. He imagined seeing Brian naked, just like in his fantasy. He imagined seeing his dick, touching his dick, and he even imagined doing something he never thought he’d do - he imagined sucking his dick. Sucking cock had never turned him on before - he thought of it as filthy, as gross - but for some reason he really, really wanted to suck the blond kid’s dick. Although he’d never seen Brian’s dick, he imagined what it must be like. Probably cut, like his own, but much better proportioned. Certainly longer than his, and thicker. And so soft, silky soft, yet hard. As he thought these thoughts he had some of the most powerful orgasms he’d ever had in his young life.

Thanksgiving came and went and Aaron kept looking around the school, trying to catch another glimpse of the kid. It was a huge high school with nearly a thousand students in each class, so it wasn’t surprising that they never crossed paths. Aaron didn’t know what he’d do if he ever actually saw Brian again. He’d probably just stare at him again and then look away. He sighed heavily, resigning himself to just jerking off to his fantasies. But there was no denying it now, he was sure he was gay. His fantasies were no longer generic - now he had a face he saw - a real person he wanted to get to know. He knew he’d have to tell his parents he was gay, and he thought they’d probably take it OK - he knew they even had gay friends - he just wasn’t ready yet. He was just coming to accept it himself.

Tuesday morning started out just like any other morning. Aaron got up, showered and shaved, and then stood looking at himself in the mirror. His dick started to get hard and he started to stroke it. In the mirror, he imagined seeing Brian sneak up from behind him and grab him around the waist. He turned his head and their lips met in a deep, passionate, lingering kiss. Aaron felt Brian’s dick, hard and poking him in the ass. Brian moved his hands lower and his right hand grasped Aaron’s hard-on and started to stroke it while cupping his balls with his left hand. It was driving Aaron crazy! His dick erupted with shot after shot of cum - it got all over the faucet, some of it even reached the mirror - almost none of it landed in the sink. Aaron groaned. Brian had vanished and he was left alone to clean up the mess. He didn’t have time for breakfast now, so he quickly dressed and ran to catch the school bus.

When Aaron got to school, he looked around carefully as he went to his locker and then to his first class. Second period was study hall - a really stupid time to have a study hall - and his thoughts wandered aimlessly as he tried to work on his assignments. His thoughts just kept coming back to Brian - he just couldn’t help it - but then there was a knock on the door and in walked Brian! Aaron was absolutely beside himself. He couldn’t help but stare. Right in the front of the classroom was Brian!

Brian walked up to the teacher and handed her a note. She read the note and then turned to the class and told them, “If I could have your attention please, this young man has an announcement.”

Brian jerked his head slightly to get his hair out of his eyes, cleared his throat, and started to speak.

“My name is Brian Sandler, and I’m here to talk to you about a group called Students for Peace. I know many of you have mothers or fathers in Iraq , or maybe even a brother or sister there. Believe me, we support our troops and this isn’t just about the Iraq War. It’s about violence in the streets, it’s about the mindless conflicts all over the globe, and it’s about hunger and starvation. As Christmas, or Chanukah, or Kwanzaa or whatever holiday you celebrate approaches, please keep in mind the message of peace that goes with the season.”

Aaron was absolutely mesmerized watching Brian. He heard his speech - in fact, he hung on every word - but he couldn’t help but stare at him and his beautiful lips as they moved. The best part was he could stare without fear of being caught! This was the first time he had seen Brian without a coat and he liked what he saw. Brian was wearing a brown plaid flannel shirt that was unbuttoned to the third button. He was wearing a gold chain that was just barely visible. He wore loose-fitting cargo pants that hung down over his sneakers, leaving much to the imagination as to what was underneath. As he spoke, his nearly shoulder-length blond hair swayed slightly as his head and eyes scanned the room, seeking to make eye contact with each and every student.

And then, Brian made eye contact with Aaron. Suddenly, they were staring at each other. Brian’s voice faltered for just a second, and then he resumed his speech and his scanning of the room, but every few moments his gaze returned to Aaron. It was clear to Aaron that Brian was staring back! He couldn’t believe the sensations that were going through his body. His dick was as hard as he’d ever felt it - straining for release from the tight confines of his jeans. And every time they made eye contact, he felt a jolt of electricity running through his body. He was on fire!

“So again, the rally is this Saturday night. We’ll meet at the UnitarianChurch on

Jefferson Road

at 6 PM and begin our march from there. Now an event like this takes a lot of work and we’re going to need some extra help to get things set up. We’re asking for one or two volunteers from each class we visit to come at 2PM to help make posters and stuff. Now please don’t feel coerced or anything, but we really could use the help.”

Aaron didn’t need to be coerced. He cared deeply about the cause, but he just wanted to be near Brian. His hand went up like lightening - almost too fast. He looked around the room and his was the only hand raised. Brian approached him and asked, “What’s your name?”

Aaron could barely speak. He just kind of sat there looking almost dumbfounded. Finally, he barely managed to eke out, “Aaron. I’m Aaron Johnson.”

Brian reached out his hand and said, “Nice to meet you, Aaron.” As they made physical contact, a quivering sensation passed through his body. He could swear that Brian felt it too from the reaction on his face. He couldn’t believe how soft Brian’s hand was. The feeling of simple skin-on-skin contact was amazing. He’d shaken many hands before, but never felt something like this. “We’re really glad to have you on board,” Brian seemed to barely be able to say. “Could you give me your phone number, in case we need to reach you?”

Aaron continued to hold Brian’s hand, far longer than he should have. Finally, he released it and gave Brian his number. Brian wrote it down and took a card out of his pocket, handing it to Aaron as he said, “Here’s my number, just in case you need to call me or anything. Please call if you can’t make it for any reason.” Brian smiled at him and then he looked down. Aaron swore he was looking at his crotch. They made eye contact again and Brian continued, “Just call me, ’K?” With that Brian turned around and walked out of the room.

Aaron couldn’t breathe. He just sat there, unable to study or even think. He started to feel confined - in more ways than one! When he couldn’t stand it any longer, he got up and asked the teacher if he could use the boys’ room. He hoped she didn’t see his erection. He entered the restroom and went into an empty stall. Even though there wasn’t anyone else in the restroom, he still felt nervous as hell.

He couldn’t help himself - he lowered his jeans, sat down and started to stroke himself. He didn’t need to fantasize this time. He thought of Brian standing in front of him, looking down at him as he sat at his desk. He thought about Brian’s long, golden hair hanging down in front of him as he leaned forward. He thought of Brian’s smooth chest as it slowly came into view in front of his face - he couldn’t see his nipples, but he imagined them in all their beauty. He thought about the electrifying feeling when their hands made contact, and those piercing blue eyes.

It didn’t take long - Aaron’s load shot straight up and hit him on his nose, and then several spurts landed on his shirt before his balls were spent. He quickly came down from his high and looked in horror as his cum started working its way into the fabric. This was a disaster.

There was just no way he could have cum so strong! He’d jerked off last night and again this morning. What was he going to do? Aaron quickly used toilet paper to wipe off the cum on his face and his hand, and the then wiped as much of it as he could off his shirt. He pulled up his pants and went to the sink - the trail of cum was unmistakable.

Aaron took some paper towels, wet them, and rubbed furiously, trying to get his semen out of the shirt. However, it only seemed to make things more apparent as the paper shed telltale bits all over his shirt. He worked on it and worked on it until the shirt looked more wet than anything, but he couldn’t be seen like this. He had to get out of there. He needed a fresh shirt and he was just going to have to cut school. He knew guys who did it all the time, but he’d never cut school before.

Aaron sneaked out of the restroom and tried sneaking down the hall, planning his escape route. Suddenly a door opened behind him and he heard a familiar, beautiful voice call his name. “Aaron?” He turned around and as he did so, they both froze in their tracks. Neither one of them could move. They just stood there, staring at each other, neither one knowing what to say. Finally, Brian approached and looked down at Aaron’s shirt and said, “Had a little accident?”

Aaron’s face turned deep red and he replied, “Well, uh, I spilled something . . .”

Brian looked back up at Aaron’s eyes and somehow he knew. With the cutest smirk on his face, he said, “Yeah, right. I bet you spilled something, and I bet I know where it came from, too.” He hesitated for a moment and then said. “If that’s what I think it is, I’m actually kinda’ flattered.” Brian looked down at his shoes and continued very softly, “If I didn’t have so many classrooms to visit, I would have done it too.” Now it was Brian who was blushing a deep shade of red. He was so cute!

He continued, “You know . . . I’ve been thinking a lot lately about who I am and what I like. Until the other night when I saw you at the movies . . . I just wasn’t sure. I mean . . . well . . . I thought I liked girls and all, and I never even thought I might be gay, but I guess down deep I never really considered myself straight either. Seeing you like that changed everything . . . and then I knew, and I’ve been able to think of little else since. Aaron, I hope I’m not being too forward, but I’ve never been one to beat around the bush.”

Aaron didn’t know what to say. “I, uh . . . I . . .”

Brian put his finger to his mouth. “Shh, don’t say anything.” Brian looked around, grabbed Aaron’s hand and pulled him back into the boy’s room. He threw his arms around Aaron’s waist and stared longingly into his eyes. Aaron could feel their bodies make contact and Brian was shaking. He himself was trembling - they were both nervous as hell. He couldn’t believe what was happening.

Brian started to tilt his head as he moved his lips slowly and steadily toward Aaron. Their lips made contact and waves of the most unbelievable sensations coursed through their bodies. At first, their kiss was tentative, but then they both let go and their lips formed a seal. Aaron wanted to stick his tongue into Brian’s mouth and he secretly wished Brian would do the same, but he was too scared, too nervous and frightened someone would come in and see them. He felt his dick straining once again against his jeans and he swore he felt Brian’s erection poking him in the thigh.

Suddenly, the bell rang loudly, scaring the shit out of the both of them. They broke their kiss and separated to a more respectable distance. Brian looked at Aaron and said, “I know what you’re thinking, but don’t. Really, your shirt’s almost dry and no one’s gonna’ notice.” Aaron actually had forgotten about the shirt. Brian suddenly seemed more hesitant. “I, I hope you feel about me the way that I feel about you.” Tears started to form in his eyes. “I hope I didn’t make too much out of it, man. If I did, I’m sorry.”

Finally, Aaron got the courage to say something as he gently, but discretely put his hand on Brian’s shoulder. “You didn’t make too much of anything, Brian. I, I, I didn’t think I was gay either, but whenever I see you, I know that I am.” There, he’d actually said it.

The most beautiful smile spread over Brian’s face as Aaron continued, “I never believed in love at first sight, but this sure feels close.”

Brian said, “I know, I feel the same way.” He looked off to the side and continued, “I’ve got to hit some more classrooms - I’m only excused for another period and you’ve got to get to class. Aaron, I meant what I said - you’ve got my card. Call me, ’K?”

“’K, I will,” was all Aaron could muster as they went their separate ways. Aaron suddenly remembered he’d left his book bag in his study hall and he quickly ran back to retrieve it. He was a few minutes late for his next class and the teacher gave him a stern look as he took his seat. He might as well have cut the rest of the school day; he couldn’t concentrate on anything other than Brian.

During the ride home on the school bus, Aaron sat alone as always. Oh, there was a kid sitting next to him who was engaged in an animated conversation with the kids in the row behind him, but Aaron didn’t even notice them. His mind was elsewhere. He stared blankly out the window at the bleak December landscape, but he didn’t really see what was out there. His mind was elsewhere. He was so zoned out with thoughts of Brian that he missed his bus stop and had to walk back several blocks through snow and slush to get back to his house.

Aaron opened the door, stepped inside, removed his now snow-covered sneakers, and walked into the kitchen. He was shivering from the cold and his lips were blue. Adam was sitting at the kitchen table, drinking chocolate milk and eating some Oreos. Adam looked up at his brother and said, “What the fuck happened to you?”

“None of your fucking business squirt. How’d you get home so fast anyway? I thought you had a meeting or something.” The two brothers usually took the same bus to their respective schools, which were only a block apart.

“Yeah, but I still beat you home. Didn’t you take the bus?”

“Yeah, well, I did, but I wasn’t paying attention and missed the stop. I missed it by a lot.”

Adam knew his brother could be pensive, but it wasn’t like him to just zone out like that. He looked at Aaron and realized that under the shaking exterior and blue lips was something else. His eyes were distant and there was a weak smile on his face. He knew that look - he’d seen in on Jamie’s face when he fell hard for Stacy. Adam’s big brother was in love. He couldn’t help but break out in a big grin. It was funny, but while Adam was nearly two years younger than his brother, he was much more socially adept and couldn’t help but slip into the “big brother” role when it came to matters of love. Annoying as he found Aaron to be, he could sympathize with what he was going through, and could only imagine what the added burden of being gay was doing to him.

Aaron finally began to come out of his fog and noticed that his brother was smiling and staring at him. “What are you looking at, you little twerp?”

“Who is he?”

“I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about,” Aaron replied as he shifted his gaze to the floor.

“C’mon, don’t deny it. Who is he? Is he cute?”

Aaron couldn’t even talk. He just kept staring at the floor and started to blush.

“Let me guess, is it Brian?”

Aaron started blushing deeply on hearing Brian’s name.

“It’s Brian, isn’t it? You saw Brian at school today.”

Aaron slowly and barely started to nod.

“C’mon, bro. Have a seat.”

Aaron seemed to float into the closest chair and sat across from his brother at the kitchen table. Even without his brother’s assistance, Aaron’s legs just couldn’t have continued to support him if he’d tried. But even as he sat there across from Adam, his mind was still elsewhere. He just stared off into space.

“Hello! Earth to Aaron.” Adam snapped his fingers in front of Aaron’s face. Suddenly, Aaron snapped out of it and looked back at his brother. Adam continued, “So, tell me about it already.”

At first, Aaron couldn’t seem to talk, but this was all new to him and in a certain way, he enjoyed talking to his more experienced younger brother. “Well, there’s going to be a rally this Saturday by a group called Students for Peace.”

“Yeah, some kid came to our science class to tell us about it. So, go on.”

“Well, it was Brian who came to tell us about it.” Aaron blushed a deep shade of crimson. “I popped a boner almost the second he entered the room. I couldn’t help it.”

“And let me guess, you volunteered to help with the rally?”

“Yeah . . .” Aaron cocked his head and smiled a bit. “And he shook my hand and I gave him my number and he gave me his.”

“Hey, the guy in our class did the same thing when Kenny volunteered. It’s not quite the real thing, you know.”

“Yeah, but I ran into him again in the hall.”


“And we talked.”


“And we kissed,” Aaron said, barely in a whisper.

“Really! You sly dog! Did you kiss on the lips?”

Aaron nodded his head yes.

“You kissed, right out in the open?”

“Well, we ducked into a restroom, but, yeah, I guess. But it was before the bell rang.”

“Not like you to be out in the hall during class.”

“It was just study hall.”

“Yeah, but you never do that ordinarily.”

“Well, I was a bit, ah, uncomfortable.”

“You didn’t!”

“I did, and I got it all over my shirt and I tried to wash it out and my shirt ended up being all wet and I decided to just ditch school and I forgot that my book bag was back in the study hall and I was just walking down the hall, trying to escape, when out popped Brian.”

“Whoa. Slow down a bit. So you ran into him in the hall and you, like, just smooched up?”

“Well, we talked a bit. And we came out to each other. I mean, I don’t know how I had the courage to do that. Hell, I haven’t even come out to myself really, but somehow I just knew that this was right. I couldn’t take my eyes off him. And it’s weird, but he couldn’t seem to take his eyes off me.”

“So you got his number. Are you going to call him?”

“Well, he asked me to, but I don’t know. I mean he only gave it to me because of the rally, but he asked me to call him anyway, so I guess, yeah. . . .”

“You got it bad, bro.”


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Please be sure to visit my forum, or e-mail me your comments. I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

3. Breaking the Ice

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 3 - Breaking the Ice

Aaron kept staring at Brian’s card. Then he’d stare at the phone, and then back at the card. He’d never done this before. He so badly wanted to talk to Brian. He so badly wanted it. But picking up the damn phone and calling him was another matter. What if Brian wasn’t home? What if someone else answered it? His mother or father, or maybe a nosey sister or brother or, gulp, another friend? What would he say? How would he handle it? Could they tell he was gay? Did Brian’s parents even know? Aaron was so confused. He didn’t know how to start and so he kept staring at the card, and then the phone and then the card.

This was pathetic. He could do this. He had to. He wanted to. He very tentatively reached for the phone, but then it suddenly rang. Aaron was startled and nearly fell out of his chair. He just stared at the ringing phone and then the ringing stopped. He heard his brother downstairs talking on the phone and just assumed it must be one of his friends.

Damn! Now that he’d finally gotten the courage to make the call, the phone would be tied up for God knows how long. Could he even get the courage again to make that call? Well, he could use his cell phone, but his parents kept a tight leash on his precious minutes. Double-Damn! He looked down at the card again and noticed that there was also an e-mail address, but he wasn’t sure if it was Brian’s personal e-mail or one for Students for Peace, which was the name on the card. Aaron chuckled as he thought of someone else reading his torrid e-mail to Brian. Nope, he’d have to wait.

He heard Adam bounding up the stairs as he continued to talk on the phone. Adam ran into Aaron’s room and said, “Aaron, it’s for you - it’s Brian,” as he winked at him.

Aaron’s eyes lit up as he took the cordless phone from his brother. “But why did you talk so long on the phone with him?”

“Have you forgotten that he’s my friend, too?

“Yeah, I actually did. Did you, uh, did you talk about me to him?”

Adam smiled and said, “Whadaya think?”

“You’re toast, shit-head.”

“Takes one to know one. Uh, do you think you might actually like to say hello to the guy or something?”

Aaron looked down at the phone, then put it up to his ear as he simultaneously shoved his brother out the door while he closed and locked it. He knew it was overkill, but he didn’t want to be interrupted.


“So you’re a total basket case, I hear.”

“N-n-not really?”

“Yeah, I bet. To tell you the truth, I’m not much better myself.”


“Yeah . . . You know, I was going to wait for you to call me, but I kept thinking about the sound of your voice and I decided, oh, what the fuck!”

Aaron giggled a bit. “Sorry, but I’m . . . well, I kept looking at the phone and, well . . .”

“So you’re a little shy. That’s cute.”

Aaron was blushing furiously. “I’m . . . I don’t know . . . Brian, I’m sorry, but I’ve never done this and . . . I’m nervous as hell.”

“Tell you the truth, bud, I’m nervous, too.”

“But Brian, you have so many friends. And the way you stood up in front of the class like that. I would’ve freaked out.”

“Aaron, I’m not as popular as you may think, and I’ve never had a friend that I wanted to feel up before.”

This made Aaron laugh. There was a long period of silence. It was obvious that both boys were trying to figure out the next step, and very nervous about the whole thing. Finally, Brian suggested, “So, should we, like . . . get together?”

“Yeah, I’ll see you at the rally.”

“No, silly. . . . I meant tonight.”

Aaron’s heart was already pounding, but when he heard this he thought it would explode out of his chest. “Where, when . . . how?”

“Well, I could come over to your place, or you could come here. I just want to be with you tonight. Just for a little while. I want to see your face. I want to get to know you and . . . I’d like to finish . . . what we started earlier.”

Aaron knew exactly what he was talking about. The last thing he wanted was his brother kidding him about all the smooching noises coming from the next bedroom, so he asked, “Who’s at home with you now?”

“Just my dad. My mom’s at her book group and will be out all evening. And my dad brought a lot of work home with him, so we’ll pretty much be alone.”

“No brothers or sisters?”

“Nope, I’m an only child.”

“Do you think it’ll be OK with your dad?”

“Let me go ask him.”

Aaron waited for what seemed an eternity, when Brian finally came back on the line. “He says it’s OK as long as we don’t make a lot of noise, and if I finish my homework first. I guess I’d better get to work on that.”

“I’ll have to ask my parents . . . where exactly do you live?”

Aaron took down the address - it was only about a mile-and-a-half away, but it was way too cold out to walk or ride his bike over. “Let me see if my mom can drive me.”

Now it was Brian’s turn to wait, listening to silence. Finally, he heard Aaron come back on the line. “She said it’s OK, but I have to be back home by ten. ‘It’s a school night, after all,’” Aaron said, lowering his voice as he quoted his father. “What time should I come over?”

Brian thought about how much homework he had to do. He had a report due at the end of the week, but that could wait. His math homework was the only thing that was due tomorrow, and that wouldn’t take too long. “Can you make it here by eight?”

“I’ve got a chemistry test tomorrow, but I think I know the stuff pretty well and I’m not going to be able to concentrate if I try to study any way. Yeah, I’ll be there at eight.”

Brian was excited as he hung up the phone. He couldn’t believe it. Aaron was coming over! His mind had been a whirlwind of lust and desire since he first saw Aaron at the movies, and he’d jacked off to fantasies of seeing him naked almost every day since. When he finally saw Aaron in that classroom, his heart nearly stopped beating entirely. It took a supreme effort to keep on giving his speech after that.

When he saw Aaron’s hand go up, he was excited. When they first made contact, he was ecstatic. And that kiss. He’d never thought about kissing a boy before, but with Aaron, it was just so right. He could still taste him on his lips. Feel his closeness on his skin. He knew he had it bad.

As he worked on his math homework, his thoughts kept drifting back to Aaron. He was finding it extremely difficult to concentrate. He finally completed it a few minutes before eight and he knew it was not his best effort. He went into his bathroom and looked in the mirror. Shit, there was a zit forming on his chin. There wasn’t much he could do about it, but why’d these things always happen at the worst times. He combed his hair, used some mouthwash and went back to his room and started pacing. Then finally the doorbell rang.

Brian raced out of his room and ran to the door. Not even stopping to look through the peephole, he flung the door open and standing right in front of him was a vision of beauty. He could have taken him right there, but that could have caused ‘problems’, and it was really, really cold outside. He invited Aaron in and the two of them stood, just inside the doorway, staring at each other for the longest time. Their faces started to move closer and closer together when Brian suddenly realized where he was and what could happen.

“Aaron, we can’t do this here,” he whispered. “My dad might see us.”

Aaron looked around at his surroundings and realized Brian was right. He found himself standing inside a large atrium with a white ceramic tile floor. Directly ahead was a great room with a vaulted ceiling and directly off of that was a large, open kitchen and off to the side, a small formal dining room. Off in a corner to the right was a small room that appeared to be a library or office. Aaron could see through the open door that seated at a desk was a handsome man with short, blond hair. The man, who appeared to be about forty, was intently studying his computer screen and periodically jotting things down on a notepad. The man didn’t even seem to be aware that the boys were in the house, let alone paying attention to what they were doing, but Brian was obviously right - there would be a lot of explaining to do if Brian’s dad saw them kissing.

Brian led Aaron to the left, down a short hallway and into what was obviously his room. Brian shut the door behind them and locked it. They looked at each other and before either could speak a word, their lips came together in a passionate embrace. A little tentatively at first, Brian pushed his tongue against Aaron’s lips and Aaron finally opened his mouth and eagerly sucked Brian’s tongue inside. They stood there in their embrace for the longest time, exploring each other’s mouths and tongues when Aaron finally broke the kiss and pushed Brian away.

“Can I at least take my coat off?”

“Oh, sorry.”

Aaron took off his coat and threw it on the bed, and they returned to yet another mind-blowing kiss - at least in their young minds, it was mind-blowing. Everything was new to them, and fresh, and wonderful, and exciting. Brian reached down and pulled Aaron’s shirt out from his pants and slipped his hands underneath, gently stroking his back as they continued their kiss. This was uncharted territory - a little dangerous, a little exciting, and too tempting to both of them.

When they finally came up for air, Aaron just stood, looking at Brian’s face. Looking at those beautiful blue eyes. His face became flushed as he looked down at the buttons of that same flannel shirt he’d seen in class that very day. Tentatively, he reached up and started to unbutton the buttons. If Brian could un-tuck Aaron’s shirt, surely Aaron could could unbutton a few of Brian’s buttons, couldn’t he? He pulled the shirt hem out and slowly opened the shirt up and pushed it back and off of Brian’s arms.

Aaron gasped at what he saw. It was better than he’d imagined - even better than in his fantasies. Brian’s skin was hairless and smooth. His nipples were large, erect and sensual - his skin still retained that light tan he’d noted earlier. Brian was still wearing that gold chain around his neck, which made him look so sexy. Aaron couldn’t get over the visual feast his eyes were taking in.

Brian reached out and grabbed the bottom of Aaron’s t-shirt and lifted it up. Aaron complied by lifting his arms up so that Brian could lift his shirt up and over his head and then off. Brian threw the shirt onto his bed. The two boys now stood, shirtless, in front of each other. Again they embraced, kissing passionately.

Aaron couldn’t believe the sensations he was feeling. The warm wetness of Brian’s mouth. The feeling of Brian’s skin against his own chest and its softness as his hands roamed Brian’s back. The feeling of Brian’s pounding heartbeat, barely discernible against the pounding of his own. The unmistakable feel of Brian’s erect member rubbing against his own, even with the layers of fabric in between. Aaron felt like he was going to pass out. This couldn’t be real.

They kissed for what seemed an eternity and then finally their lips parted. Once again they stared into each others eyes and slowly their gaze drifted downward. They looked at each other’s chests, drinking in the sensual sight of their nipples. They parted slightly more and looked at each others abs, and below.

Brian tentatively reached for Aaron’s belt, but Aaron just backed away. It was a very awkward moment and even Aaron wasn’t sure why he did it. He wanted to have sex with Brian more than anything, but this was a big step. A very big step. He had just begun to accept his sexuality - both boys had - but going beyond first base was crossing a very scary line. It was going from the theoretical to the real, and Aaron wasn’t sure he was ready yet. Truth be told, he was scared shitless.

They looked back at each other’s faces. Both boys had the look of fear in their eyes, bordering on terror. Then Brian spoke. “I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.” Tears started to form in his eyes. He stepped backwards and sat down on his bed, burying his face in his hands. “Aaron, I thought . . . I didn’t mean to . . . You know . . .”

Aaron sat down on the bed next to Brian and put his arm around his bare shoulder. He turned and looked at Brian, whose face was still buried in his hands. “Brian, it’s not your fault. You didn’t do anything wrong. You didn’t do anything I didn’t want. It’s me. This is all so new. I’ve never done this before.”

“You think I have?”

“No. I know. It’s just . . . I don’t know. I think I love you, and I’m scared. Really, really scared. I would love nothing more than to have my lips around your dick right now.” Brian looked up at Aaron and both boys blushed. “But I don’t want to screw this up, no pun intended. I don’t want to lose you in a moment of passion.”

“I know what you mean. I think I love you, too. I couldn’t stand it if I lost you, Aaron. I guess I just want you so bad.” Again, both boys blushed. “But you mean so much to me. Maybe we should take it slow, but that won’t stop me from wanting to rip your clothes off.”

Aaron laughed out loud and then said, “I’d really like to get to know you. I know you’re interested in the peace movement, but what else do you like?”

“Right now the peace movement is the most important thing in my life. Well next to you that is. I’m passionate about it. The world cannot go on this way. Do you realize how many trillions of dollars go into people killing each other, worldwide? People are starving in Africa, not because there isn’t enough food, but because of war. Genocide has become acceptable as the world looks the other way. Yes, one of my best friends’ father was killed in Iraq, but that was just the catalyst that got me to thinking.”

“I don’t like the war in Iraq, either,” Aaron said, “but I never looked at it that way before.”

“That’s OK, Aaron. Most people don’t see it that way either. I’m not saying we shouldn’t fight terrorism, but there wouldn’t be terrorists in the first place if we could learn to live together. If we could learn to ‘beat our swords into plowshares’, all that money could be used to feed the world and eliminate poverty. I know I’m an idealist, but we have to start somewhere.”

“That was so beautiful.” Aaron couldn’t help himself. He reached back across and soon both boys were locked in a passionate kiss. After another minute, their lips parted and Aaron asked, “So, what else do you like?”

“I guess I do tend to get carried away.” They both laughed. The boys started talking animatedly about their favorite bands, movies, video games and the like. They discovered they had remarkably similar tastes in music, especially when it came to some of the alternative bands, and jazz. Both were serious students with a particular interest in math.

Neither one had a major interest in sports, but Brian was much more social than Aaron and more involved in all sorts of activities. He found that being involved in band gave him a chance to make friends and to appear to be interested in sports without having to be a jock. Aaron was much more interested in computers - Brian liked computers, too, but his parents had filters installed that kept him from getting to the good stuff.

They exchanged each other’s e-mail and chat addresses. The time flew by and when they heard Aaron’s mom’s car, they were both surprised that it was already nearly ten.

They then realized that they were both still shirtless and giggled as they rushed to put their shirts back on. Brian said, “Aaron, thanks for coming over. I’ve never had a better time.”

“Me too. Sorry, but I gotta go. If I’m lucky, my mom’ll let me drive the car back home. She doesn’t like me driving when it’s this dark and slippery out, but at least she let me drive here.”

“You got you’re learner’s permit?”

“You bet. I took Driver’s Ed last summer.”

“Cool. I can’t wait to take it this summer. With you driving, we won’t need our parents to shuttle us around. When’s your birthday?”

“March 8. I can’t wait! I gotta go now, though.”

“I know. Please call me or chat, ’K?


When Aaron got home, he turned on his computer and immediately went on-line. He fired up his instant messenger and, sure enough, Brian was on line, too:

Aaron030890: Hey

Brian060991: Hey yourself

Aaron030890: I had a great time tonight

Brian060991: Me 2

Aaron030890: I luv u

Brian060991: I luv u 2

Aaron030890: Can we get together at school?

Brian060991: luv 2

Aaron030890: When do u have lunch?

Brian060991: Second

Aaron030890: Damn - I have first lunch

Brian060991: That sucks

Aaron030890: I take the early bus. How bout u

Brian060991: Late bus. Oh man

Aaron030890: Maybe we can meet just b4 class?

Brian060991: Yeah, that’s kewl. Where?

Aaron030890: In front of the library

Brian060991: K, c u there

Aaron030890: Yeah, c u. GTG to bed now

Brian060991: Me 2. Bye

Aaron030890: Bye

Aaron shut down his computer and got ready for bed. He took off all his clothes and slipped under the covers. He’d occasionally slept in the nude before, but fear of getting caught kept him from doing it regularly. He decided he’d do it tonight. He turned out the lights and lay on his back, under the covers, with his raging hard-on tenting the sheets.

With thoughts of Brian in his head, he started to stroke himself. He threw the covers off and started jerking himself off in earnest. He fondled his balls and picked up the pace. He didn’t need to fantasize tonight - he just kept thinking of the feel of Brian’s skin against his and the electric sensation of their kisses. Soon - far too quickly - waves of pleasure overtook him as his semen covered his face, his neck and his chest before it started to dribble onto his abdomen.

Aaron hated dealing with a messy aftermath, but somehow this was different. It was absolutely the most intense orgasm he’d ever had. Some of his cum landed on his lips and he tentatively licked them with his tongue. He’d never tasted his own stuff before, but now he had a newfound interest. ‘Not bad,’ he thought. ‘A little bitter, but kind of nice.’ He reached over and grabbed some tissues from his night-stand and started to clean up. He must have used about a dozen of them before he was dry. He rolled them into a ball and dropped it under the bed, reminding himself as he drifted off to sleep that he needed to throw them out in the morning before his mom could vacuum his bedroom.


Discuss the Story

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Love in a Chair Index

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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

4. Falling in Love

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 4 - Falling in Love

Aaron woke with a start when the alarm went off the next morning and then remembered the events of the last night. With energy he never knew he had, he showered and dressed in record time and bounded down the stairs. This was the first time he could remember when he was the first down for breakfast. He and his brother took the same bus in the morning to school and usually had breakfast together. The automatic coffee maker was already brewing coffee for his parents, so he knew it wouldn’t be long before his mom came down. Sure enough, as he got his cereal, his mom walked in.

“What’s up with you?” she asked. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you down here this early.”

“Nothing special. I just spent less time in the shower today.” He smiled to himself as he said it, as he’d seriously considered jerking off in the shower, but his excitement got the better of him - he just couldn’t wait to see Brian again.

“Well you sure seem to have a lot of extra energy this morning.”

Just then Adam walked in. “Hey goofball, what’s up? You’re up awfully early.”

“So what’s it to you?”

Adam looked at his brother and then smiled broadly. He whispered, “This about last night?”

Aaron’s face turned a deep shade of red. He wasn’t sure if his mother heard Adam’s question, but if she did, she could easily put two and two together. The last thing he wanted was for his parents to know he was gay - at least not yet. He leaned over and whispered back, “Can we talk about this later?”

Adam looked back at his mom, who was busily preparing her breakfast. “I see your point, bro. We’ll talk later.”

Once they were on the bus, they continued. Adam asked, “So?”

“So what?”

“Tell me what happened.”

“Nothing happened. We just talked.”

“Yeah, right. You spent the entire time talking. Sure.”

“OK, we kissed.”

“You kissed?”

“We kissed a lot. Actually, we kissed about as much as we talked.”

“You mean like serious making out? Some real tongue action.”

Again Aaron blushed. “Yeah.”

“So did you get each other naked?”

“Such a dirty mind you have, little brother. I don’t go around asking you what you do with Jenny, do I?”

“Little brother my ass. I have ten times the experience you do.”

“Not for much longer if I can help it. Besides which, you should show some respect to your older and wiser brother”

“Wiser? Let’s see. . . . Who was it who missed his bus stop because he zoned out, then had to walk back several blocks through slush and ice? I don’t think so. But I’ll give you a break anyway this time. So tell me, did you get naked?”

“No. I mean, we got our shirts off, but that was it.”

“Didn’t Brian want to go further,” Adam said this very softly so as not to bring attention to the fact they were talking about a boy rather than a girl.

“Actually he did. I guess I was just too nervous.”

“You’re such a girl.”


When Adam said nothing, Aaron continued, “Adam, have you ever had sex?”

“Actually, no, but give me a break, I’m only thirteen. It’s not that I haven’t tried, but it’s the girls who seem to get spooked. That’s what I meant.”


As the bus arrived at the middle school, Adam said, “Gotta go - talk to you later.”

Aaron stayed on the bus while it drove just up the street to the high school. When he arrived, he still had nearly an hour to kill before classes began. Usually he would do some reading in the library or sit in the cafeteria studying, but today he had too much pent-up energy. He couldn’t sit and he couldn’t stand still. He paced all over, wandering aimlessly waiting for the second buses to arrive. He was so excited, he could hear his heartbeat pounding in his ears.

When he saw the first of the students arriving, he made his way to the library and tried to stand casually in front, but not very successfully. Aaron kept scanning the crowd, but there was still no sign of Brian. The warning bell rang, and he still wasn’t there! He waited until the second bell, but still no sign of Brian. Argh! Aaron was crushed. Reluctantly, he headed to class and was five minutes late.

The day progressed at a snail’s pace and Aaron just couldn’t concentrate on his classes. One of his teachers even commented on his not paying attention, but let it slide since Aaron was usually a good student. At the end of the day, he tried waiting in front of the library until the last minute, hoping to see Brian before he had to catch his bus. Reluctantly, he boarded the bus and was joined by his brother a few minutes later.

“Hey, doofus, how’d it go?” But Aaron just stared into space. When he didn’t answer his brother’s question, Adam asked again in a more polite tone, “Aaron, is everything OK?”

“He didn’t show, Adam. I waited in front of the library for twenty minutes this morning, and he didn’t show.”

“Well, I’m sure there’s a good reason.”

“I hope so, but I’d rather not talk about it.”

They both sat silently during the rest of the bus ride. At least with his brother seated next to him, he didn’t miss his bus stop today as he otherwise might have.

As soon as he walked in the door, he ran upstairs to his room, picked up the phone and dialed. A woman answered the phone. Aaron asked, “Hello, is Brian there?”

“He’s not here right now. May I ask who’s calling?”

“It’s Aaron. Aaron Johnson.”

“Oh, yes, Aaron. Brian spoke about you this morning. He told me what great friends you’d become. You were over here last night, weren’t you?”

“Yes, I was.”

“Brian’s at band practice right now. He should be back in about an hour. Would you like me to have him call you after dinner?”

“Yes, thanks Mrs. Sandler. I’d appreciate that.”

“No problem, and I’ll look forward to meeting you.”

“Me too.”

The wait through dinner was interminable and his parents kept distracting him.

“Aaron, you seemed so perky this morning, and you’re hardly eating tonight,” his mom noted. “Is everything alright?”

“Yes, Mom, every things fine,” he answered, trying to sound upbeat.

“Are you sure?” his dad asked.

Aaron answered a bit too abruptly, “Yeah, dad, I’m fine. May I be excused? I’m finished here.”

His parents knew something was wrong, but they weren’t about to push it, so they left him alone. Aaron returned to his room and sat, moping and staring at the phone that never seemed to ring. When it did ring, it startled Aaron, practically throwing him out of his chair. He quickly answered.


“Hello, Aaron?” It was Brian! Aaron loved the sound of his voice.

“Where were you, man?”

“I zoned out this morning. I freakin’ missed the bus. My mom had to give me a ride this morning and was pretty pissed. I told her I felt a little off today. I hope she bought it.”

“Yeah, I know what you mean. I’m not sure I want my parents to know anything, yet.”

“Me neither. Maybe not ever. They’re pretty religious and not too tolerant of gays.”

“That really sucks. Do you feel it’s wrong to be gay?” Aaron asked somewhat tentatively.

“Hell no! I never went for any of that religious crap in the first place. Besides, I didn’t choose this. I didn’t ask to be gay. I didn’t really want to be gay. But this is who I am. How could a just God hate me for being born this way?”

“I know. I feel the same way . . . So you had band practice today?”

“Yeah, I love playing in the band.”

“What instrument do you play?”

“I play the trumpet. I also play sax, but not in the band.”

The two boys went on talking for more than an hour. Finally, Aaron’s mom asked to use the phone.

“Sure, mom. Just give me a few minutes.” He went back to talking to Brian. “So, do you think we could maybe get together tonight?

“Sorry, but I have a lot of homework, not that I’ll be able to concentrate on it.”

“I know what you mean. How about tomorrow night?”

“Do you think maybe our parents will get suspicious if we get together so much? I mean, it’s not like we share any classes or clubs.” Reluctantly, Aaron agreed. Brian continued, “Tell you what. Why don’t you come over tomorrow night right from school. You can stay for dinner and we can have some time together afterwards. I’ll tell my folks that we’re making plans for the peace rally.”

“That’s a great idea! Are you sure it’ll be OK with your parents?”

“I’ll go ask them. Why don’t you go ask yours?”

Within a minute, they had permission from both sets of parents and their “date” was on. They spent an hour instant messaging later that night, and Brian made sure not to miss his bus the next morning. This time they had a good fifteen minutes in the morning. They didn’t talk very much, but they couldn’t exactly spend the time making out, either. They just enjoyed being together.

They met again at the end of the day and sat together on a bench in the sun outside while waiting for nearly an hour until Brian’s bus arrived. During this time, and on the ride home, they continued to talk about their likes and dislikes, their loves and hates and about their hopes and dreams. Brian wanted to be a jazz musician, but would probably become a math teacher since he’d need a “day job”. Aaron wanted to be a computer engineer. The time passed quickly and before they knew it, they were getting off the bus and walking to Brian’s house.

“Hello Mom, this is Aaron, Brian said, gesturing in Aaron’s general direction.”

“Hello, Aaron, it’s very nice to meet you.”

“It’s nice to meet you, too, Mrs. Sandler,” Aaron replied.

“Mom, could Aaron and I get started on our project while you get dinner ready?”

“Well, your father’s running late and you do have a guest, so why don’t you two go along and I’ll let you know when dinner’s ready.”

That was all the cue they needed as they headed off to Brian’s room. Brian shut the door behind them and locked it, and within less than a second they were in each other’s embrace and sucking on each other’s tongues. Aaron pulled himself away and looked at the perfect boy standing in front of him and uttered, “I love you. Brian, I know we have only known each other a few days, but I feel like I’ve known you a lifetime. I can’t believe I found you and I’m the luckiest boy in the universe. You’re my friend. You’re my dream.”

Brian just stood there with a blank look on his face. He was speechless and a tear started to drop from his right eye. He then reached his head forward and the two of them shared the most mind-blowing kiss yet. They kissed and kissed as if the world would stop spinning if they stopped. Not missing a beat, Brian led them to his bed and they both lay down on it, still locked together by their mouths.

Aaron started rubbing his hand up and down Brian’s chest, and then he slipped his fingers between the buttons in front and started massaging Brian’s left nipple. That sent electric sensations through both boys. Brian took his own hand and rubbed it down the front of Aaron’s t-shirt until he reached his belly button. He finally broke the kiss and looked Aaron in the eyes, and let his eyes drift downward to Aaron’s crotch. He looked back up at Aaron with a hopeful expression that melted Aaron’s heart.

“It’s OK, Brian. Before, I didn’t want to ruin our love with pure lust. Not that I don’t lust for you now, but I’m more sure than ever that truly this is love. I want you - I want to feel you - more than anything in the world.”

Brian didn’t need another invitation. He slowly brought his hand lower and brought it to rest right over Aaron’s raging hard-on. He gently rubbed his hand over the love of his life’s dick, and Aaron began to do the same with Brian. They started kissing each other again as they groped each other for a long time. They then broke their lip-lock once again and Brian reached with both hands and slowly and seductively unzipped Aaron’s pants. He reached inside and felt Aaron’s dick through his boxers. He then reached through the boxer’s fly, grabbed Aaron’s member and brought it out into the open. He held onto it and started to stroke it lightly.

Aaron gasped. He couldn’t believe the sensations that were tilting his world. Never had he felt anything like it before and he knew that it wasn’t just because a cute guy was stroking him - it was because the boy he loved was touching him where no one else had touched him before. He wanted so desperately to see Brian - to feel Brian - but the overflow of emotions kept him from doing anything more than whimpering from the pleasure he felt. Brian picked up the pace of his stroking, but then they heard a car drive up. It was Brian’s dad.

“We better finish this later,” Brian said. “Dinner will be ready soon.”

“Yeah, I guess so,” Aaron said as he tried, not too successfully, to stuff his dick back inside his pants. They spent a few minutes discussing the upcoming rally while waiting for dinner. It was about the only thing they could do to try to get their boners under control. It was scarcely five minutes before Brian’s mom called out that dinner was ready. The boys joined Brian’s parents in the dining room and Brian introduced Aaron to his dad. They then sat across from each other at the table and sat down.

Brian’s father said, “Let us say Grace,” as he extended his hands toward Brian on his left and Aaron on his right. Everyone held hands as Mr. Sandler thanked the Lord for the food about to be consumed, but Aaron’s thoughts were on anything but prayer. For one thing it felt weird to be holding hands with complete strangers, and a friend’s parents no less. He couldn’t help but stare at the sweet boy sitting directly across from him. More than once during the meal, Brian had to lightly kick Aaron when he failed to respond to questions his parents were asking him. Still, in spite of the awkward moments, Aaron enjoyed the meal and getting to know how Brian lived when not at school.

After dinner the boys helped to clear the table and then retreated to Brian’s room. Brian put on Coldplay’s just released ‘XY’ CD and turned the volume up so that his parents wouldn’t hear what was going on. Within seconds, they were locked in the most intimate of embraces and passionate of kisses. After coming up for air, they shed their shirts and then Brian reached forward and flirtatiously unbuckled Aaron’s belt. “Have a seat, lover,” he said with a wink and Aaron sat on the edge of Brian’s bed. Brian untied Aaron’s sneakers and took them off, and then he slowly removed Aaron’s socks, gently caressing his feet as he did so. Aaron never felt anything sexual about his feet before, but this really aroused him. “Now, it’s time to stand up,” Brian commanded and Aaron readily complied. Brian unbuttoned Aaron’s jeans, unzipped them and slowly and seductively lowered them to the floor. Aaron stepped out of his jeans and stood in front of Brian wearing nothing but his obviously tented boxers.

Next, Brian started to unfasten his own belt, but Aaron stopped him. “Let me do that,” he said as he repeated what Brian had done, leaving both boys almost completely naked. They stood facing each other for what seemed to be forever, both a bit nervous about the next step, but neither one saying anything. Finally Aaron couldn’t stand it any more and he reached under the waistband of his own boxers, slowly lowered them to the floor and stepped out of them. His dick immediately sprang free and pointed up in the direction of Brian’s chest. Brian smiled broadly and then did the same. Aaron gasped when Brian’s 5 ½ circumcised inches came into view. It was better than anything he could have imagined. He was in awe.

After staring at each other’s erections, the boys returned to looking each other in the eye, reveling in the absolute love they saw in each other. Slowly they returned to a tight embrace and passionately kissed each other as their dicks became trapped between their bodies and against each other. As they kissed, they started to dry hump each other. Brian motioned to his bed and they both lay down without breaking their kiss. They rolled on top of each other. In the end Brian ended up on top and he pulled away slightly to feast his eyes on Aaron below him. He reached down and kissed each of Aaron’s nipples, and then ran his tongue around them, driving Aaron insane. He then kissed his way down Aaron’s chest and abdomen, tongued his navel and made his way to the base of Aaron’s cock. He nuzzled his nose in Aaron’s pubic hairs and inhaled deeply, luxuriating in the scent. He licked his way up the shaft and kissed the head of Aaron’s dick. Aaron almost lost it right there.

Brian then took his tongue and licked right at the tender underside of Aaron’s dick, just below the engorged head. He took Aaron’s cock deep into his mouth and pulled back slowly, caressing it with his tongue and sucking forcefully. Aaron flinched when Brian accidentally nicked him with his teeth. “I’m sorry, Aaron. I’m so, so sorry. I’ve never done this before and I’m trying really hard.”

“It’s OK, baby. I love what you’re doing to me. We’ve got all the time in the world to get it right.”

Brian resumed going down on Aaron, bobbing up and down. He gagged a few times but eventually got into a rhythm. Far too soon, Aaron said, “Um Brian, I’m gonna . . .” but before he could even finish his sentence, Aaron’s balls drew up close and an explosion of feelings coursed through his body. His spunk flew out his cock and jetted straight back into Brian’s unprepared throat. Brian gagged immediately, lurching backward and coughing violently, ejecting Aaron’s spunk back onto his convulsing dick, which was still spurting cum onto Brian’s face. Although a little diminished by the turn of events, Aaron experienced an orgasm that was several times more powerful than anything he’d ever experienced in his life - it was just short-lived.

Slowly, Brian regained his composure and his hacking settled to an occasional cough. Aaron returned to earth and looked up to see his own cum, streaked all over his boyfriend’s face and hair. He couldn’t help it - he started to giggle uncontrollably. Brian started laughing and pretty soon both boys were giggling hysterically, which of course started Brian’s coughing up again, eliciting another round of giggles. Never did they think that sex could be so funny.

There was a knock at the door. It was Brian’s mom. “Is everything alright in there?”

Both boys froze as they realized that they’d forgotten to lock the door. “Every thing’s fine, Mom. We were looking at a political cartoon on the Internet for the rally and it was just so funny.”

“Well if you’re sure you’re OK.”

“Yeah, we’re fine, Mom.”

They both breathed a sigh of relief when she didn’t enter, and then Brian got up and locked the door. He went to his bathroom and rinsed Aaron’s cum off his face and hair, toweling his hair dry. He returned to see Aaron sprawled naked on his bed, grinning eagerly up at him. Both boys started giggling again. And they giggled every time they thought about what had happened.

“Come here, Brian. I’d like to return the favor.” Brian leapt onto the bed and Aaron quickly flipped him onto his back. Aaron plunged down on his face and kissed him deeply. He moved down, kissed and licked each of Brian’s nipples, then worked his way down Brian’s chest and belly, kissing and tonguing him along the way.

He inhaled deeply the aroma from Brian’s light pubic bush and moved around to smell Brian’s soft and sensual balls. Tentatively he licked at Brian’s right ball, and then his left, and then he licked his way up from behind the balls, right down the middle. Brian started to moan uncontrollably while Aaron did this. He licked right up the tender underside of Brian’s cock and then lingered with his tongue at the most sensitive point, just as Brian had. “Aaron, please, OH Ah . . .”

Before Aaron could react, Brian’s cum shot straight out, landing on Aaron’s face, in his hair and even up his nose. As Brian came down from his high, Aaron couldn’t help but snicker. Both boys were giggling again as a wad of Brian’s cum dripped down Aaron’s face and into his open mouth. He sucked it in, swished it around his mouth and swallowed. It wasn’t at all what he'd expected - it tasted a bit like raw egg whites with a bit of a sweet and salty taste. All-in-all he decided he liked it and he reached down and sucked the remainder of Brian’s cum from off his dick. Once he was satisfied that he’d gotten all he could, he went to the sink in Brian’s bathroom and cleaned up.

Aaron lay back down next to Brian on the bed and said, “That was just awesome.”

“Simply amazing. I know. I mean, we didn’t quite get it right, but it was fun and it was the most incredible thing I’ve ever experienced.”

“Me too.”

After talking a little about what had just happened and kissing some more, it was starting to get late and they decided to get dressed and work a bit on the upcoming peace rally. That was, after all, the reason Aaron was supposed to be there. After a while, Aaron called his mom to come pick him up.”

“So can we see each other again tomorrow night?”

“Can’t. I have band practice. We have a big game on Sunday.”

“Oh yeah, that’s right.”

“Well should we meet again in front of the library in the morning, then?”

“Sorry, but I have to pick up my trumpet - one of the valves is sticking.”

“Well then I guess we’ll just have to wait until Saturday.”

“Saturday it is, then. At least we’ll be together the whole afternoon and evening.”

“Except we’ll both be busy and there’ll be a lot of other people around.”

“Yeah, I know. But somehow it feels great knowing that you’ll be by my side the whole time.

“Yeah, doesn’t it?”


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

5. Revelations

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 5 - Revelations

Aaron awoke early on Saturday morning and had more energy than he knew existed. He jumped out of bed and made his bed in two seconds flat (yeah, he was a neat freak). He bounded for the shower and sang loudly as he washed. He had a raging boner almost the whole time, but that was for later. No need to waste it this early in the morning.

His brother staggered into the bathroom just as Aaron was getting out of the shower.

“Aaron, please, it’s too early for this sort of thing.” He then looked down at Aaron’s still throbbing member and continued, “You better watch it with that thing. It looks like a pretty lethal weapon.”

“That it is, little bro. That it is.”

Adam walked out and closed the door behind him while Aaron continued getting ready. He put on his deodorant and splashed on a little cologne that he’d swiped from his father’s medicine cabinet. He lathered up and shaved, even though he really didn’t need a shave, but he wanted to look his best for his honey.

Aaron bounded down the stairs and into the kitchen. His mom was sitting there, drinking a cup of coffee. “Hi, Mom!” He said with more enthusiasm than was appropriate for any teenager on a Saturday morning.

“Aren’t you a bit excited for a Saturday morning? Usually I don’t see you down here until lunchtime.”

“I know, but I’m really excited about the peace rally. And I got some reading and homework to do for school, so I thought I’d better get it done first.”

“Since when do you not wait until the last second to do your homework?”

“I don’t know. I just feel like it. Besides, I’m thinking about going to the game tomorrow.”

“What game?”

“Our school’s football game.”

“Since when do you go to a football game? I didn’t think you even liked football.”

“Well, I think I’m liking it more. And I’m going to meet friends there.”

Well, this was certainly getting interesting. Mrs. Johnson knew this wasn’t her son. She’d wanted to see him make friends, but he was pretty much a loner. It was great that he seemed to have made a friend now, but this look of excitement was something more, and she had a good idea of what it was.

“Aaron, I can see you’re very excited about the peace rally and the game tomorrow, but could we take a few minutes to talk?”

Aaron suddenly felt nervous. His mother never approached him so directly unless she had something serious to say. When he just stood there with his eyes wide open, with a “deer in the headlights’ look on his face, she tried to reassure him, “Don’t worry, honey. I’m not going to bite your head off or anything. Why don’t you please sit down and relax?”

Aaron sat down, but he was far from relaxed. In fact, he was on the verge of panicking. Even before she said it, he had a good idea of what was coming. “Aaron, I know you probably don’t want to talk about this, but I want you to know that I will love you no matter what. Who your are, what you are and who you love are things we have little choice about in life. Believe me, I know this as well as anyone and, short of you choosing to do something illegal or harmful to others, you will always be my son and one of my best friends in life.” She looked directly at him. “Aaron, is your friendship with Brian something more?”

Aaron’s face turned deep red. He broke eye contact and looked down as tears started to form in his eyes. His mom knew. She knew! How in the hell could she have known? Was she angry? Would she let him see Brian again? This wasn’t how he’d planned to come out to her - it was way too soon. He wasn’t nearly ready yet.

“Aaron, you don’t have to feel ashamed about it. It may be hard for you to believe, but I’ve been in love, too.”

Aaron looked back up at his mother with fear in his eyes. “Yes, but you aren’t gay,” he said. “Are you mad at me?” Aaron asked softly as he started to cry.

“Heavens no, Aaron. I know it’s harder to be gay - I won’t lie to you or sugar-coat the way others may see it - but in my book it isn’t important to me whether you’re gay, straight or bisexual. Sure, I’m a bit disappointed that you won’t be giving me grandchildren - what mother wouldn’t be - but what matters is that you’re a good person and I love you very much. I could never be mad at you for who you are.”

Aaron walked around the table and threw his arms around his mother and began to sob uncontrollably. He wasn’t sure if they were tears of joy or tears of the pain and suffering. And he was a teenager with hormones and all of the pent up emotions that boys are expected to suppress.

As his tears started to subside, Mrs. Johnson continued. “Aaron, I want you to know that I’m here for you. This isn’t going to be easy and you probably want to be careful at school and in public. Most people still don’t accept homosexuality. If you go around school the way you went around here today, people are going to know you’re in love. If you act affectionately toward Brian in public, you both could be in for a rough time.

“One thing you probably do need to think about is what you would do if you really were outed at school. Now for all the reasons I spoke about, I recommend that you keep it quiet. I’m not saying you should lie or have sham relationships with girls or deny who you are, but keep it low.” She smiled as she continued, “I think that ‘Don’t ask, Don’t tell’ applies really well here. However, if there’s a gay-straight alliance at school, I suggest you consider joining - it would be a safe place where you could be yourselves. But if your being gay gets out and kids pick on you, you have to be strong - much stronger than straight people have to be. Don’t hesitate to hold your head up high and tell them, ‘you should be so lucky to have a love like mine.’”

Aaron laughed as he sat back down next to his mother. She continued, “Now I’m not sure if I want to know if you’ve had sex yet.” Aaron blushed and looked down. “Well, I guess it was stupid to ask. In any case, Aaron, I know you don’t want to talk about sex with me, but you have to be careful.”


“Aaron, listen to me. I’m not sure if I should tell you this, but I had my first sexual experience with a boy when I was around your age.”

Aaron was shocked. His mother was telling him she’d had sex as a kid. This was way too much information.

She reached out and lifted his chin until he was looking back at her. “It’s dangerous enough, but AIDS is still out there. There may be drugs to control HIV, but there still isn’t a cure.”

“But Mom, neither one of us has had sex before. And it was just oral sex anyway,” Aaron blurted out without really thinking about what he’d just said.

This time it was Mrs. Johnson that was blushing. “Well, although oral sex is less risky, it’s not risk-free. You can still get AIDS from oral sex. But anal sex is another matter. I don’t want to lose you. You should always use a condom any time you exchange fluids, either orally or anally, but you absolutely must use a condom if you have anal sex.”

Aaron again was looking down, and Mrs. Johnson again lifted his chin and looked into his eyes. “Aaron, I’ll make a deal with you. Whatever you do with Brian behind your closed bedroom door is your own business. I will not bother you, I will not enter and if you two feel comfortable having sex under this roof, then it’s OK by me. The one condition is that you promise me that you will practice safer sex. That means using a condom whenever you have oral sex and particularly when you have anal sex. I know I can’t exactly check up on you to enforce this, but you’re a good boy and I know that if you make this promise to me, you won’t break it.”

Aaron couldn’t believe what his mom was saying. His mom was telling him it would be OK to have sex in her house. Unlimited sex! Yes! So he’d have to use a condom - he could live with that, in more ways than one. “Mom, I absolutely promise I will use a condom every time I have oral or anal sex.” And then he had another thought. “But what about Dad?”

“Your father and I haven’t used condoms in years,” she said in a perfect deadpan. When Aaron just stared at her with a blank expression on his face, she burst out laughing and only then did he realize she was making a joke. “Well, he isn’t going to be thrilled with all of this, but I think he’ll come around. You may also want to talk to your brother - otherwise he could give you a hard time.”

“Adam’ll be cool with it. He already knows about me and Brian. He knew I was gay even before I did.”

“Do Brian’s parents know?”

“I don’t think so, and I don’t want them to. They’re really religious and Brian thinks they’d try to split us up if they knew.”

“Well, that’s between Brian and his parents, and I certainly won’t intervene. Perhaps it’s best that they not know for now - at least not until Brian’s older. You can always have him over here.”

“Mom, I couldn’t stand it if his parents took him away from me. I love him. He’s all I think about. We were made for each other.”

“I know how you feel. Right now there is nothing more important to you. I don’t want to spoil it for you, but first loves rarely last. I’m not saying this one won’t, but there will probably be others.”

“No, Mom. No way! Brian’s the one. I love him and we’re going to be together forever.”

“Well, I’m glad you feel that way. Now why don’t you go do your homework, and then you can go see him at the rally.”

“Thanks, Mom. If I haven’t told you lately, I love you. You’re the greatest!”

Concentrating on homework was difficult, but Aaron didn’t want anything in the way for the rest of the weekend. He was going to spend all his time with Brian, and he couldn’t wait! Finally it was time to leave, and his mom let him drive to the rally. She wished him luck as he entered the church. His face lit up when he saw Brian sitting behind one of the registration tables. Brian was talking to one of the other volunteers and didn’t see Aaron until he was practically on top of him. He looked up to see who was casting the shadow and he broke into a broad grin when he saw that is was his lover.

“Aaron. Thanks for coming.”

“You couldn’t keep me away if I were in chains.”

“Listen, I’m not going to be able to spend a lot of time with you until the rally itself. I have a lot to do here.” Brian made up a name badge for Aaron and handed it to him. “Here, put this on and head downstairs. Look for a guy named Larry. He’ll put you to work in the meantime.”

Aaron went down the stairs and tried to find Larry. He concentrated on looking at the older kids first, and then finally asked someone to point him out. He was surprised when he was steered to another young kid who looked to be about Brian’s age. He was about 5’5”, had sandy brown hair and hazel eyes, and he was very cute.

“Larry, I’m Aaron Johnson. My friend Brian said I should ask for you.”

“Aaron, it’s really great to meet you.” Larry said as he shook Aaron’s hand and simultaneously punched his left fist into Aaron’s right shoulder.

“What was that about?”

“Hey, it’s not every day I meet my best bud’s boyfriend.”

Aaron’s jaw just about dropped to the floor. He was speechless.

“Don’t worry about it. Your secret’s safe with me. Brian and I tell each other everything. We’ve known each other since second grade. No way he could keep something this big from me. And besides, it’s cool. Brian’s a good guy. He’s gotten me out of trouble more than a few times. His being gay doesn’t change things. He’s still my best bud, and that makes you my best bud, too.”

Aaron still didn’t know what to say. It was really cool that Brian had a good friend that he could trust with this, but it also made him feel a little less secure. He wasn’t ready to go public - that’s for sure.

“Aaron, we seem to have plenty of people working on pickets for now. We’re planning to have a candlelight vigil. We’re hoping for at least a couple hundred students to show tonight, but it could be as many as 500.

“Over there,” Larry motioned to some boxes stacked against the wall, “are some boxes of candles. It would be a big help if you could remove the candles from the boxes and set them up on those tables over there,” he nodded in the other direction. “Be sure to inspect each candle carefully and check to make sure the glass is intact. If any candles have cracks in them, put them aside. We don’t want any kids getting burned, or worse, tonight. Make sure that each candle has a decent wick. No need to make someone spend an hour trying to light their candle. We have plenty, and we can return any that are defective.

“When you’ve finished setting up the candles on the tables, grab the books of matches and place one book with each candle. It’ll save a lot of time if each kid lights their own candle.”

“Thanks, Larry, and it was nice to meet you. I’ll get right on it.”

Larry had given Aaron perhaps the most tedious task. Each candle was wrapped in cellophane and he had to unwrap each one and then carefully inspect the glass container. More than a few had cracks, and he had put them in the rejects pile. A larger number had nonexistent wicks and these had to be discarded as well. You’d never know how much work is involved in preparing 500 candles. It took him most of the afternoon, but it was just as well as it kept him occupied while he was separated from Brian.

By the time he finished, the basement was getting very crowded as kids started showing up for the rally. Even when it was time for the rally to start, kids were still arriving and almost all the candles were gone. Frantically, Aaron grabbed the remaining boxes and started handing out candles and matches, not even taking the time to unwrap them. There was just no time to inspect them now and he could only hope they were OK. There were still a few kids in line when he ran out completely and he ended up retrieving some of the discarded ones and warning each kid to be careful of them. He himself was forced to take one that had a slight chip around the rim. By now all the food that had been set up for the volunteers was gone and Aaron didn’t have time to eat anyway - he’d just have to go hungry.

Once he was finally able to get upstairs, he was confronted by a mad scene. There were kids of all ages everywhere standing outside the church and the din of them all talking at once was almost unbearable. Aaron looked everywhere but he couldn’t see Brian. He didn’t know what to do. Then someone started talking using a megaphone.

“May I have your attention please. May I please have your attention.” But the din continued. Finally, someone shot off a cap gun, and that got everyone’s attention. “Alright. Listen up everybody. First of all, I want to thank all of you for coming out today. You have exceeded our wildest imaginations. At last count, there are 793 of you signed in for this event.” A large cheer went up from the crowd. “Now this rally is about peace and it will be a peaceful rally. To keep things orderly, each of you has been assigned to a group. The groups are arranged alphabetically and each of you has a group leader who will tell you what to do. Now please line up on the sidewalk, starting at the stop sign, as I call the last letter of your name. We’re starting with A, B and C. If your last name begins with A, B or C, join Charley over by the stop sign.”

And so it went as the kids were assembled, group by group into the procession. When they got to the J’s, Aaron was pleased to see that his group leader was Brian. When Brian saw him he grabbed him and made sure he was at the front of the group - an unofficial group co-leader of sorts. Brian told everyone to light their candles and then they joined those ahead of them in the march. They marched their way through town, singing songs of peace. A lot of the music was from the ‘60’s - it reminded Aaron of the stuff he read about in school on the peace marches during the Vietnam War. There were a few instances of hecklers and he later learned that some of the marchers were pelted with eggs, but by and large it was a very successful march with a number of people along the way honking their horns and giving other signs of support.

Of course while Aaron was singing, although his heart was in the march, he couldn’t help but think of the boy walking next to him. Every chance he got he stole a glance to his side to catch a glimpse of that vision of perfection. Every now and then he noticed that Brian was looking at him, too. Both boys had a great time, but the march was a long one that lasted nearly two hours. After returning to the church and after everyone else had left, the organizers had to stay and clean up. It was close to midnight by the time the boys were ready to be picked up.

As they waited for their parents, Aaron began, “My mom knows.”


“My mom knows about us.”


“I don’t know. Out of the blue she asked me if we were more than friends. I guess I didn’t do a good job of hiding it.”

“Is she angry?”

“No, she’s actually cool with it. And get this - she says we can do whatever we want behind my closed bedroom door.”

“Get out of here. Really?!”

“She made a deal with me. No restrictions as long as we use condoms.”

“Aaron, I’ve never been with anyone else. You have nothing to worry about from me.”

“I know, babe. I trust you. I haven’t had sex with anyone else, either. Hell, we haven’t even had more than oral sex with each other. But it’s my mom. She’s worried about AIDS.”

“I can understand that. She doesn’t know me that well. Oh well, I guess using condoms is a small price to pay for a safe place to have sex. That is so cool!”

“Totally! So, when can we get together?”

“You mean getting together as in getting together?”

“You perv!” They both laughed. “I’d like to see you tomorrow.”

“You know there’s a big game tomorrow. I won’t have time beforehand, and we usually go out afterwards.”

“Actually, I’d like to see the game. I’d like to see you perform.”

“Well that’s cool. You aren’t exactly into sports, though”

“No, but you’ll be there, and I’d like to be there, too.”

“You going with anybody?”

“Nah, I’ll just go alone.”

“That sure sounds like fun. Hey, wait a minute.” He turned and shouted, “Larry!”

Larry came over. “’Sup studs?”

“You going to the game tomorrow?”

“Well I was gonna go, but Cindy had to cancel on me, so I thought I’d just stay home.”

“Would you like to go with Aaron? Don’t get any ideas, though - he’s my boy.”

“Dude, you have nothing to fear from me. I’m straight as an arrow. Sure, I’d love to go.”

Just then Larry’s dad showed up, so they made their arrangements and said their goodbyes. Soon Aaron himself was on his way home and before he went to bed, his parents made him watch the news segment they recorded from the 11:00 news that showed the rally. Sure enough, for a brief instant the camera focused on Aaron and Brian, side-by-side as they marched. It was pretty cool. He then realized he was absolutely starving, having not eaten since lunch, and his mom made a sandwich for him. As he ate in the kitchen, his father joined him.

“Aaron, your mom told me about you and Brian.”


“I just wanted you to know that I’m OK with it. You’re still the son I raised and I love you very much. What I care most about is that you’re happy and that you have someone in your life to love and be loved by.”

They embraced warmly for a long time, and then Aaron headed upstairs. Within ten minutes he was in bed and sound asleep.


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

6. Love Blossoms

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 6 - Love Blossoms

Aaron hadn’t been expecting to enjoy the football game, but was surprised when he did. It started when Larry’s dad swung by and picked him up. From the moment he stepped into the car, Larry made him feel like a friend. It amazed him how quickly Larry adopted him, treating him as if they’d always been friends. The fact that Aaron was gay didn’t even enter into the equation. Better still, Larry didn’t keep pestering him about who he thought was hot or whose skirt he wanted to get up the way his other ‘friends’ at school did. Larry accepted Aaron for who he was and for the first time since he had reached sexual awareness, he didn’t feel self-conscious.

Even more amazing was how Larry treated Aaron’s naiveté about football. Larry was patient and explained everything to him. He pointed out the different players and explained the different strategies the coach was applying. No one - not even his father - had taken the time to explain football in such detail to him and Aaron surprisingly found he was getting into the game. The first half was more than just a filler while waiting to see Brian - it was fun! Besides which, it didn’t hurt that their team was winning.

Finally it was halftime and the band came out to rally the fans. There were so many kids in the band - at first Aaron didn’t think he saw Brian, but then with a little help from Larry, he spotted him and immediately broke into a broad grin. The band didn’t seem half-bad, but Aaron was convinced that with every note, Brian’s were the loudest and clearest. To him it was Brian who was the star of the show. OK, he knew he was maybe just a little bit biased, but he was allowed to be biased, after all.

When play resumed, Larry turned to Aaron and said, “You know, Aaron, Cindy and I were thinking of joining the gay-straight alliance. Why don’t you and Brian join with us?”

Aaron just about fell off the bleacher. It was the first time Larry had mentioned the ‘g’ word all day, and it came totally from out of the blue. “Why would you and Cindy join?”

“Because it’s a gay-straight alliance. Duh! The whole idea is to give people who are gay, or who have friends who are gay, or who just feel that homophobia is wrong, a place to hang out. Now that I know my best buds are gay, I’m going to join even if you guys don’t.”

What Larry was saying made a lot of sense, but this was a big step for Aaron. He’d only recently accepted that he was gay and he sure as hell didn’t feel ready to come out of the closet. Joining a gay organization was a bigger step than he felt comfortable with right now. “I dunno. I guess it could be cool, but I’m not sure if I’m ready for that.”

“That’s cool. I think I know how you feel. It’s really something you and Brian should talk about with each other anyway. Sorry if I put on a little pressure - I just thought it might do a little good for the both of you. This has gotta’ be a tough adjustment. Wouldn’t it make a lot of sense to go through it with other kids who are going through the same thing?”

Now that did make a lot of sense to Aaron. He knew his sexual orientation probably had a lot to do with why he didn’t feel comfortable with other kids. Maybe the gay-straight alliance would be a good place to make friends. Not that he was looking for another lover - no one could come close to being Brian - but the GSA would have a lot of like-minded people, both gay and straight, and for the first time he could truly be himself without having to worry about what others thought. “You’re probably right. I’ll talk to Brian about it.”

“Cool! We could all go together. Oh, Henderson ’s coming into the game. This should be good.” And with that the conversation returned to football and Aaron’s heart rate started to return to normal.

Toward the end of the fourth quarter, Larry motioned for Aaron to get up and they started to make their way to the exit. The game was going very well and they were winning, 28-13, so there was little fear of missing anything, and Larry had an idea. Aaron just assumed that Larry’s dad must be an impatient guy, but then, rather than heading out the exit, they actually headed toward the field.

“What are we doing?”

“You’ll see.” The two boys could only go so far, but they had a decent view of part of the playing field and watched the final play of the game and, with that, the crowd erupted in a loud cheer as the band started playing the school song. It was so loud, it almost sounded as if the band were right on top of them, which it basically was.

The sound of everyone exiting the stadium was almost deafening. Soon, Larry and Aaron were practically swept out of the stadium by the band members as they exited. And then Aaron saw Brian. He looked so cute in his uniform. He almost started to run to him with the intent to wrap him in a crushing hug, but then he remembered where he was and settled for swinging his arm around his shoulder.

“Aaron, you came!”

“Wouldn’t have missed it for anything.”

“I’m glad.”

“Hey, let’s not get all mushy,” Larry said as he caught up to them. Both boys blushed as they once again remembered where they were.

“Just a minute,” Brian said as he suddenly ran off and talked to some of the other band members.

“What was that about?” Aaron asked when he returned.

“I was just telling some of my friends that I’m not going with them today. I told them I had other plans.”

“You do?

“I do now,” Brian said, giving Aaron a sly wink. He turned to Larry and asked, “Do you think your dad could give me a ride back to Aaron’s house?”

“You’re such a horn dog. Sure, you can ride back with us.”

“No, no, Larry. We just want to spend a little time together.”

“Yeah, right.”

“No seriously.” This time it was Aaron who spoke. “There’s more to life than sex. Just being with Brian means more to me than anything else in the world. Do you have sex with Cindy every time you see her?”

“Not that I wouldn’t want to. Actually, ah, you know, well, we haven’t even gotten beyond first base. Not that I wouldn’t want to do more - a lot more - but Cindy wants to take things kinda slow. Actually, I guess I do, too. I hear what you’re saying, guys. But I still think it’s cool that you can do it so easily. I mean, there’s none of that boy-girl mystery thing with you. You both know what you’ve got and you know how it feels. Somehow it just seems easier, and you don’t have to worry about getting each other pregnant.”

“Well, my mom still wants us to use condoms.”

“Aaron, your mom knows?”

“Yeah, somehow she figured it out.”

“And if she wants you to use condoms . . . I mean, does that mean she’s OK with you having sex?”

“Why do you think we’re going to Aaron’s house?” Brian grinned with his reply.

“Oh man, I’m jealous. My folks would die if they thought I was having sex. Not that I’m having sex, and I’m not sure I would want my parents to know, but not having to sneak around must be awesome.”

“True that, Larry. Oh, but my parents don’t know, and it’s best they not know. ’K?” Brian said with some concern.

“Your secret’s safe with me.”

Just then Larry’s dad drove up and they all got in, with Larry sitting in front and Aaron and Brian sitting in back.

“Brian, don’t you usually go out with the band after a game?”

“Not tonight, Mr. Epstein. I’m going to spend a little time with Aaron at his house. Would you mind giving me a ride there?”

“Of course not, Brian. But I was planning to take Larry and Aaron out for a bite first. You’re welcome to join us. Is that OK?”

“You bet!” When wouldn’t a teenage boy want to grab something to eat, after all? On the way to the “BK”, Brian whispered to Larry, “Hey, does your dad know?”

“No.” That told the boys all they needed to know. Larry’s dad didn’t know about Aaron and Brian and he didn’t need to know. They would keep it quiet when they were with him.

After eating, they headed to Aaron’s house and Larry said his goodbyes.

“Brian, what a pleasant surprise! It’s nice to see you,” Mrs. Johnson said with enthusiasm as she gave him a hug.

“Mom, don’t smother the guy.”

“Sorry about that, Brian.”

“Mrs. J, could I use your phone to call my folks. I better let them know I’m here. They think I’m out with the rest of the band.”

“That’s a very responsible thing to do, Brian. But you don’t have to ask - you can always use our phone when you’re over here.”

With that, he called his parents and got their permission to stay until just before ten. He asked Aaron’s mom if he could get a ride from her back to his house and she readily agreed. After hanging up the phone, the two boys bounded up the stairs to Aaron’s room. Although it seemed like they had been in love forever, it didn’t hit Aaron until they were up there that this was the first time Brian had seen his room.

“This is a really cool room, Aaron.” Brian continued to look around the room and at all of Aaron’s stuff. “And it’s pretty neat, like mine.”

“Actually, it looks pretty messy to me. Look at all those piles on my desk.”

“Controlled chaos. I like it. There’s no clothes on the floor. Your bed’s made. I mean, when I go over to Larry’s, it’s like there’s no place to walk. His floor’s covered with, well, everything.”

“Yeah, kinda like my brother’s room,” Aaron replied.

“”Hmm. At least you have a brother. And a damn good one at that.”

“Did I hear someone talking about me?” Adam said as he entered the room.

“Hey AdaMan. How you doin’? Haven’t seen you much since last spring.”

“Yeah, well, now that you’re in high school and I’m still in middle school. Well, it’s just not the same there without you.”

“Yeah, right. I’m sure the place is real broken up about me being gone.”

“Oh, you’re gone?” Adam said with a sly grin.

“Watch it, fuck-off.”

“Temper, temper. Speaking of fuck-offs, maybe I should let you two alone.” The whole room seemed to get a red glow from the color of Aaron’s and Brian’s skin at the moment. “And try not to be too loud. Just remember that Mom’s downstairs. And for Pete’s sake, I’ll be right in the next room. Probably jackin’ off if you make too much noise.”

“Now that’s a sight I’d really like to see,” Aaron said in response.

“Great, my brother’s a pervert.”

“Takes one to know one.”

“I’ll second that,” Brian added.

“I’m outta here.” Adam closed the door behind him and Aaron followed to lock it.

The two boys stood facing each other for what seemed like hours, each one afraid to take the next step. They both knew where this could lead and were a bit scared. Finally, Aaron couldn’t take it any more and he made the first move. Placing his hands on Brian’s shoulders, he slowly moved his face forward as Brian did likewise. Their eyes closed as their mouths started to make contact. Electricity flowed between the two as their lips opened and their tongues slid against each other. Both boys wrapped their arms around each other as they embraced tightly. Aaron could feel Brian’s heartbeat against his chest, nearly drowned out by the pounding of his own. The kiss lasted an eternity as their passion seemed to explode. Brian reached down and pulled at the hem of Aaron’s shirt, breaking their kiss only long enough to slip the shirt over Aaron’s head. Aaron unbuttoned the vest of Brian’s uniform and then removed it and the shirt underneath, and soon the boys were locked back in a serious kiss, rubbing their chests against each other and rubbing their hands against each other’s backs.

Aaron and Brian kissed and kissed again as they kept their embrace, slowly turning as they felt each other’s bodies with their hands. It was then that Aaron saw it for the first time and broke their kiss. “What is it, Aaron?” Brian asked. Rather than say anything, Aaron walked over to the night-stand next to his bed and lifted the packages. There were two gift-wrapped boxes, and there was an attached card. Aaron opened the card and started to read it. He then read it aloud to his boyfriend:

“Dear Aaron, Please don’t take this the wrong way, but I care deeply about you and want you boys to be safe. Believe me, this is not a green light for the two of you to ‘go all the way’. Love is about much more than sex. Before you go further, please ask yourself if you’re acting on love, or lust. Love is deep and lasting. Lust is strong, but burns out quickly. If you really love Brian, you owe it to yourself to take it slowly. Let your love develop as it feels right to both of you. Please accept these gifts as a token of that beautiful future you will share together. Put one or both of them away for now knowing they’ll be there when you’re ready, whether it’s next week, or next month, or next year. But above all else, remember your promise. Love, Mom.”

Aaron didn’t need to open the packages to know what was inside. His mom was saving him the embarrassment of buying his own condoms and lubricant. Without a word, he opened the drawer in his night-stand and placed the unopened long and thin gift-wrapped package inside. He turned to Brian and said, “To tell you the truth, I’m not sure I’m ready to go all the way just yet.”

“Me neither. It’s pretty scary, huh?”

“Yeah. I mean, not that I wouldn’t like to do it, but this is all so new to me. I think I know what my mom means. There’s a part of me that really wants to do nothing but have wild and passionate sex with you, but my mind is telling me I want more. What I feel for you is much more than lust. Just being with you is so special.”

“Yeah, I feel the same way.” And with that, the boys resumed passionately kissing. Slowly, the sexual energy that had left the room began to return.

Aaron timidly asked, “How about giving each other blow jobs, just like we did before, but maybe a little slower this time? We’ve still got a few hours before you have to go. Let’s take our time and enjoy it.”

“That sounds perfect.” Brian reached forward and grabbed Aaron into another crushing embrace as they mashed their mouths together and gently wrestled with each others tongues. He then broke the kiss and started to kiss and lick at Aaron’s left earlobe and then down the side of his neck. Aaron was ecstatic. Brian then continued to kiss and lick down the front of Aaron’s chest and then kissed his left nipple. Aaron moaned softly. Brian licked at Aaron’s nipple, swirling his tongue around it in circles as Aaron started to moan more loudly. He then proceeded to kiss and lick the other nipple.

Aaron pushed Brian away and said, “You’d better slow down a bit or I’ll cum in my pants.”

Both boys laughed and Brian said, “Maybe we should get rid of the pants.” Aaron reached forward and unbuckled Brian’s belt and unbuttoned, unzipped and removed his pants. He then sat Brian down and unlaced and removed each shoe, and then slipped Brian’s socks off his feet. Finally he had Brian stand up and he pulled his boxers down and had him step out of them. Brian then returned the favor, undressing Aaron the rest of the way so that both boys stood completely naked in front of each other.

The boys once again embraced, locking lips in a passionate kiss as they ground their dicks against each other. This time it was Aaron who took the initiative as he mimicked the moves Brian had made earlier, licking down Brian’s neck and chest and kissing and licking each nipple. Both boys were completely in sync with each other.

“How about a 69?” Brian said.

“That would be so cool. I’d love it!”

Aaron retrieved the flatter of the two gift-wrapped boxes from his night-stand and proceeded to open it. He tore off one condom from inside and handed it to Brian, and then tore off one for himself. He unwrapped his condom and anxiously unrolled it over the head of Brian’s dick, and then down the shaft. Brian in turn did the same with Aaron. They then lay down on Aaron’s bed, side by side and kissed each other for a few minutes before Brian started once again kissing his way down Aaron’s chest. He gently licked at Aaron’s navel and then continued his way downward, stopping when he reached the base of Aaron’s dick. He then flipped himself around, giving Aaron equal access.

Brian licked the head of Aaron’s dick and Aaron flinched at the sudden sensation. Aaron licked the tip of Brian’s dick and elicited the same reaction. Both boys were leaking precum heavily into their respective condoms. Brian went down on Aaron, taking nearly half of Aaron’s erection into his mouth and swirling his tongue around the sensitive head. Aaron mimicked Brian’s moves precisely. Both boys were in absolute heaven. They were getting close and they each seemed to sense it and backed off, allowing themselves to cool down a bit. Aaron then took the tip of his tongue and slowly licked it along the tender underside of Brian’s dick from the base to the sensitive spot just below the piss slit. Brian did the same to Aaron. Brian reached his mouth over Aaron’s dick and took one and then the other of Aaron’s balls into his mouth, gently and lovingly sucking on them. Aaron in turn did the same to Brian.

They then both went down on each other’s dicks again, this time going down all the way to the pubes. Aaron couldn’t believe he was doing this. He didn’t think he could swallow cock without gagging, but somehow this just came naturally. It felt so right. They bobbed up and down on each other’s dicks until they both felt near the edge, then again backed off and went back to sucking and licking each other’s balls. They repeated their ministrations several times, each time backing off just before they felt ready to cum.

Neither one of them talked - they just seemed to sense what the other wanted. After what seemed like more than an hour of doing this, without saying a word, they picked up their rhythm. They bobbed their heads up and down on each others’ shafts, sucking as much as they dared without ripping their condoms off. They groaned and moaned as each shot their loads into the condoms at nearly the exact same time. Neither one needed to warn the other - they both knew when they were about to blow. As they came down from their orgasms, they collapsed next to each other.

It was a while before either one could move. Finally, Brian turned himself back around so that he could look Aaron in the eyes. They both grinned at each other and Brian said, “Wow! I mean really, wow! That was unbelievable. Unbelievable. I’ve never felt anything close to that. I thought I’d had orgasms before, but nothing has ever felt anything like this one. Not one tenth as fucking good. That was just fucking amazing. Truly fucking amazing.”

“And that fucking description doesn’t even come fucking close!” The boys both giggled at that and then Aaron closed the distance between their mouths and they engaged in a passionate kiss. They kissed for what seemed like hours and then just lay together side by side talking about nothing in particular. They enjoyed each other’s company more than either one could say in words. Finally, when it was getting close to time for Brian to leave, they reluctantly got dressed and went back downstairs.

Aaron’s mom let him drive when they took Brian back to his house. They said their goodbyes and Aaron drove back home, his mother by his side.

“Sounds like you boys had a good time.”


“I’m sorry, Aaron. I didn’t mean to spoil it for you, but you were a little loud.”

“Do you mind if we not talk about this - it’s kinda embarrassing.”

They were approaching their home by then anyway and just went inside. Aaron bounded upstairs and his brother came out of his room and grinned wickedly at him. “Man, you two went at it forever. I jerked off twice - you were just so hot and I couldn’t stand it. Not that I’m gay or anything, but the thought of you having sex next door was outrageous.”

“Glad you liked it, bro.” And with that they wished each other goodnight. After brushing his teeth and getting ready for the school day ahead tomorrow, Aaron found himself lying naked on his back in bed, staring up at the ceiling. He kept replaying the events of the day in his head, from the football game to the most mind-blowing sexual experience of his life. After a while, he drifted off to the most peaceful sleep he’d ever had.


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

7. The GSA

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 7 - The GSA

In the coming weeks, Aaron and Brian settled into a routine of seeing each other every morning before school, occasionally visiting at Aaron’s house once or twice a week for a ‘quickie’ and getting together every now and then after one of Brian’s games. They couldn’t do this every time without raising suspicions, but they relished their time together when they did. Their love making was not as frequent or as deep as during their first 69, but it was something special and borne out of the love they shared. They never went any farther than they had that night, but knew that eventually their relationship would evolve and then they’d be ready for the next step.

In the meantime, Aaron became good friends with Larry. They shared the same lunch period and usually sat together. When they went to Brian’s games, it was often with Cindy and she accepted him as a friend, too. She was a sweet girl and he found he really liked her. It was at a Tuesday night game just before the Christmas break that Larry reminded Aaron about joining the GSA. Aaron hadn’t yet gotten around to discussing it with Brian, and was still a bit nervous about coming out, even though it wouldn’t be to the whole school.

“Come on, Aaron. It’ll be fun. The holiday party will be the perfect time for you and Brian to get involved. Think about it - there’ll be a lot of people there and everyone will be having a good time. You won’t be as self-conscious because everyone’ll be relaxed. It’ll be great,” Larry said, giving it his best sales pitch.

“So when is the party?”

“This Friday night.”

This Friday night? Holy Shit!”

“Don’t worry about it. We’ll be right there with you. Hey, Cindy and I are already planning to go, with our without you. Why not join us?”

“Well, let me ask Brian.”

“Of course, but I’m going to hold you to it, now. Ask him tonight. Ask him right after the game.”

As usual, they exited just as the game was ending so that they could wait for Brian. Aaron waved to Brian as he came through the gate and as always, he swung his arm around his shoulder when he approached.

“You played great tonight, as always.”

“Yeah, right. You could hear me play out of all the other members of the band.”

“I swear, I could.”

Brian laughed at the absurdity.

“So are you going to ask him?” Larry asked as he nudged Aaron.

“Ask me what?”

“Brian, . . . Larry and Cindy want us to go to a holiday party with them Friday night.”

“You mean a double date? You want us to come out?”

Aaron lowered his voice. “It’s a party of the Gay-Straight Alliance.”

“Oh, I see.” Brian stared off into space for what seemed to be a few minutes, deep in thought. “It makes sense for us to go. I mean it would really be nice to have some friends we can be comfortable around besides Larry and Cindy. Yeah, I think it’s a good idea. I’m just not sure what to tell my parents.”

“Do you think maybe they’d be OK with the truth?” Larry said.

“Are you kidding?! My dad would freak. He’d wonder why all of a sudden I’m going to a party for sinners. He’d probably figure out Aaron’s gay. Hell, he might even realize I’m gay. He’d never let me see Aaron again. No way, man. I can’t tell my parents.”

“OK, tell them I’m the one who’s gay. Tell them that I came out to you recently and that you want to help. You’ve known me forever and it would be totally in character for you to want to give me your support. After all, you’d never turn your back on your best bud. Hell, you could even tell them you’re trying to save me.”

“What about Cindy?”

“Tell them that she’s a lesbian. . . .”

“I beg your pardon?!” Cindy said.

“Honey, it would just be for Brian’s folks and no one else would have to know. As far as they’re concerned, our relationship would be just a cover - a way to stay in the closet.”

“Larry, Cindy, I can’t ask you to do that. There are too many ramifications. What if he talks to your parents or even to other people? It just wouldn’t work.”

“What if you tell them it’s just a school holiday dance. You don’t have to tell them it’s a GSA dance.”

“You didn’t say it was a dance, Larry.” Aaron said.

“I’ve never danced with a guy,” added Brian.

“Well, guys, there’s always a first time for everything, so whatdaya say?”

“That would be OK except that my parents’d wonder why I hadn’t mentioned it before. I mean it’s not like school dances happen at the last minute and all. A party at a friend’s house is one thing, but a school dance?”

“Well then, maybe you could just tell them I’m having a party at my house?”

“He’d want to talk to your folks. Do you think that you could get your parents to lie about having a party at your house as a cover for me? I think not - certainly not without their knowing why we’re doing this. . . .”

“And my father would freak out about it himself and probably ground me for even thinking about trying to be dishonest with your parents,” Larry added.

“Guys, I think you’re really over-thinking this,” Cindy interjected. “School dances happen all the time and we’re new to high school, after all - well, all of us except Aaron. Brian, why don’t you just tell your folks that Aaron mentioned that the school has a holiday dance this Friday and asked if we wanted to go. Tell them you didn’t plan to go or even mention it before because you don’t have a girlfriend and felt funny about going without a date, but Aaron told you he doesn’t have a girlfriend either and thought the two of you could go stag along with the two of us. Wouldn’t that work?”

“Yeah, I suppose that would work.”

“All right, then. It’s settled,” Larry said to keep the ball rolling. “My dad’ll pick us up this Friday night and we’ll go to the dance.”

After saying their goodbyes, Aaron found himself alone in his room that night, thinking about their conversation. This sure was going faster than he’d like. His parents and brother knew, Larry and Cindy knew. This Friday he would be meeting a bunch of people from his school who would soon know. Frankly, he was scared. He kept thinking of ways he could get out of it, but not going to the dance didn’t seem to be an option any more. Larry was a persistent little shit who would never let them back out. Deep down, he knew that Larry had his and Brian’s best interests at heart, but it didn’t make it any easier. The dance would allow him to experience his coming out in a ‘safe’ environment and he might learn from others who were going through the same thing. But boy was he nervous. More like petrified, actually.

The rest of the week went by in a blur as he tried to focus, often unsuccessfully, on end-of-year projects and exams. Finally the school week was over and he found himself getting ready for the dance. He picked out a polo shirt and some khakis, and put on a somewhat Christmassy sweater. He looked in the mirror and combed his hair, and then re-combed it just trying to get those waves to not look like ridges running down the length of his head. He wasn’t quite satisfied with the way he looked when he heard the car pull up outside, but it would have to do.

Aaron got in the car and closed the door. Cindy was sitting up front with Larry’s dad, with the three boys sitting in back. Brian was in the middle. No one really spoke on the way over and they all could feel the tension in the car. Everyone was nervous. When they arrived at the school, Larry’s father stopped the car and turned around to look directly at Brian and Aaron.

“Brian, Aaron, I want you boys to be careful. People are gonna talk.”

Brian started to open his mouth in protest, but Larry’s dad raised his hand to silence him and continued. “Brian, I’ve known you since you were seven. I had a feeling there was something going on between you and Aaron even before. Look at the way you’re sitting. Your legs and shoulders are right up against Aaron, but you’ve left a respectable gap between you and Larry. People are going to notice these things.” Both boys were blushing furiously.

He continued, “I understand why you don’t want people to know you’re gay. Hell, I’m not sure why in the world you’d choose this in the first place, but I know you well enough to know that I’m certainly not going to be able to change your mind. Frankly what you are and what you do is between you and God and it’s none of my business. However, I know your father wouldn’t see it that way and if he knew, it would be hell for you. Don’t worry - I’m not about to tell him and I’ll respect your privacy. But you need to do everything you can to keep your secret, at least until you graduate and are on your own.”

“Thanks, Mr. Epstein. I really appreciate everything you’re doing for me. I think Aaron does too.” Aaron nodded his head in agreement. “I know you think it’s a choice, but I had no more choice in this than Larry did in being left-handed. I didn’t want to be gay, but I’m glad I am. If I hadn’t been gay I would have never fallen in love with the most wonderful boy in the universe. I can’t believe how lucky I am. I know it could be rough for us and we will have to be careful. I really appreciate your support, and I know Aaron does, too.

“Don’t worry about any of that tonight. Tonight is about having a good time. Have fun, be careful and give me a call when you’re ready to be picked up.”

“We will, Dad,” Larry responded.

The two couples got out of the car and nervously entered the high school. A few other people were also starting to arrive. Inside, there was a table with some name tags and a very cute girl sitting behind the table, checking people in. “Hi, guys. I don’t think I’ve seen you at one of our functions before. Are you new to the GSA?”

“Yeah,” Aaron answered sheepishly.

“Well, first of all, welcome. I want you all to know that there is absolutely no pressure here. No one is going to ask you if you’re gay, straight or bi . We’re all friends here who share a common belief - that sexual orientation is an absolute and fundamental right and that we are all entitled to the same treatment. All that aside, we’re here to have fun tonight. You can do whatever you want and you don’t have to worry about showing affection or dancing with whomever you choose. In short, tonight you have total freedom. Now there are some things you probably won’t want to do, however. Orgies are strictly off-limits, for example.” They all burst into laughter.

They were still giggling a bit when they entered the gym. There was a small group inside - perhaps only about 15 or 20 students - but it was still early and others would probably show soon. The lights were down and there was some Green Day playing in the background. A table by the far wall contained a punch bowl, some beverages, chips, cookies and other snacks. Most everyone was milling around talking to each other in small groups. Aaron recognized a few faces, but he couldn’t really tell who among them was gay. The guys were mostly talking to guys and the girls to girls. Cindy ran off to talk to one of her friends, leaving the three boys to talk to each other.

After a few minutes, someone Aaron knew from some of his classes came over to talk to them. His name was Scott and Aaron introduced him to the other two. Scott asked, “Is this your first time at one of these?”

“Yeah,” Aaron admitted.

“I’ve been attending meetings for a few months now. The Halloween ball was a blast. A lot of the guys dressed in drag - even the straight ones. It was a great!”

“Sounds like it,” Larry added as they all laughed. “So, I know we’re not supposed to ask each other who’s gay and who’s straight or anything, but don’t people pretty much know?”

“You take it at your own pace. If you want you can just sit around and talk, experience and learn tonight. I didn’t admit I was gay until the third meeting - I was just too chicken and embarrassed by it all, and I was still a little unsure myself. But I’m glad I did. I’m not out to the rest of the school, but with this group I can be myself without fear. Some day I’ll come out to my parents. And then maybe to my friends, but for now I’m keeping it low key. It’s still very new to me.”

“Do you have a boyfriend?” Aaron asked.

“Not yet. Why, you interested?”

Aaron nearly panicked, but then realized he could answer without admitting he was gay. “Sorry, but no.”

Scott sighed and said, “Too bad. My guess is you’re either straight or you’re hitched - don’t tell me - I’ll know soon enough.”

They were soon joined by a couple of other guys, one a friend of Larry’s and one a friend of Scott’s. They talked about a bunch of things, mostly related to school, football and basketball. They were all having a good time and felt comfortable just being their selves with each other until Ben Folds’ The Luckiest started playing.

“God, I love that song,” Aaron said. “It’s one of my absolute favorites.”

“Mine too,” Brian added. Brian looked Aaron directly in the eyes and his heart melted. There was no way in hell they could not dance to it, but coming out was a huge step.

“Brian, I know we’ve avoided talking about it - I’m just not sure I’m ready.”

“I know, but this is The Luckiest. I’m not sure I want to come out either, but in a way this is our song. I really am the luckiest guy in the world.”

“Um, guys, you do realize you just came out to me, don’t you?” Scott said, bringing them back to the reality of where they were. Both boys blushed as Scott continued, “Believe me, I know it’s a big step, but you’re safe here. And if you two don’t dance together, I’m going to ask one of you to dance anyway, so you might as well do it.”

Brian mustered up all the courage he could as he grabbed Aaron by the hand and led him to the dance floor. They were both trembling as they held each other tightly, swaying to the music. They were soon joined by Larry and Cindy, and by several other couples, about half boys dancing together, a few of them girls dancing together and the rest mixed couples. By the time the song wound down, they felt as if they were the only two people in the room. Aaron and Brian looked into each other’s eyes and then closed them as they slowly moved their faces toward each other. Their lips met and their mouths quickly opened as they engaged in a passionate, deep kiss. As their lips parted, a few people around them started to clap and both boys blushed furiously, suddenly remembering where they were.

They danced to a few fast songs before they left the dance floor and returned to the small circle of boys they had been talking to. Scott said, “Boy, you two were so hot. Damn, Aaron, If I’d known you were gay, I would’ve asked you out a long time ago.”

“Too late, Scott. He’s all mine,” came Brian’s retort.

As the evening wore on, Aaron and Brian had a chance to speak to several of the other boys about being gay and dealing with parents, friends and the ignorant in general. Brian learned something very useful - that some of the lesbian girls were very much in the same situation as he was and were more than willing to go out with gay boys now and then, just to keep up appearances. He was later introduced to a girl named Sharon and the two of them hit it off right away. They exchanged phone numbers and e-mail/chat addresses, and agreed to go out sometime after the Christmas break.

Aaron and Brian danced several more times that night and had a wonderful time together. Aaron danced once with Scott - it was certainly innocent enough - and Brian even found himself in a dance with Larry. Neither one of them expected it and it was Larry who initiated it as kind of a joke, but somehow it just felt right. It didn’t make Larry gay and they were still just best buds having a good time in a way most people would never understand.

By the time the dance wound down, Aaron and Brian had made several new friends and they felt a lot better about who they were. They were no longer alone and had to admit that Larry and Cindy were right. For their part, Larry and Cindy also grew as people that evening. What started out as a commitment to help their friends out became more of a cause for the two of them.

It was nearly one A.M. by the time the car pulled up in front of Aaron’s house. After kissing Brian goodbye - something he would have never thought he could do before Larry’s father had confronted them earlier that night - he went inside. His mom was waiting up for him and she was anxious to hear how things went. By the time Aaron went upstairs, she couldn’t help but feel good - Aaron had a peer support group that he desperately needed. Upstairs, he got the third degree from his brother, who had to hear everything in detail. Adam might be a nosey, younger brother, but in many ways he was Aaron’s best friend. By the time Aaron got undressed and ready for bed, it was after two A.M.

Lying in bed, he thought about the events of the evening and the wonderful time he’d had. Tonight had been a definite turning point in his life. He was gay and he’d admitted he was gay in front of a room full of like-minded teens. He didn’t talk to the adult supervisors that evening, but thought that they could probably help him if he needed it in the future. It was kind of cool to know that a few of the teachers were OK with his being gay and were supportive. Since one of them was his history teacher, however, he also sensed that he’d have to be on guard in that class. He knew that Mr. Sampson would never betray his trust - Aaron was just a little worried that he himself might let his guard down without thinking. He’d have to be careful.

And then Aaron’s thoughts turned to the coming Christmas break, which officially had started that night. Neither he nor Brian had given it much thought, as they would have to spend Christmas itself with their families and, besides, their minds had been preoccupied by the GSA dance. Well, they’d certainly have a lot of free time during the coming weeks and he really wanted to spend as much of it with Brian as he could get away with. Finding a happy balance between being together and not raising Brian’s parents’ suspicions would be tough, and they’d have to err on the side of caution. Aaron fundamentally knew that, but his dick had other ideas.

In the nude as usual, he started to fondle himself and quickly was at full mast. Lifting the covers off his body, he slowly started to stroke himself while thinking about his first dance with Brian and the passionate kiss afterwards while everyone else was watching. It didn’t take long and he was soon squirting stream after stream of hot cum onto his chest and abdomen. He reached down and wiped his cum onto his hand and then started to lick it off. What little there was left he rubbed into his skin. There - no muss, no fuss - just the way he liked it. Aaron turned over and went to sleep.


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

8. Winter Break

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 8 - Winter Break

As much as they wanted to, Aaron and Brian couldn’t find a time to get together on Saturday, and Christmas was on Sunday. Both families had plans and in Aaron’s case, relatives were in from out of town, pretty much precluding anything from happening when it came to making love. Christmas day was a time spent with family and Aaron and Brian managed to talk to each other on the phone later in the day. Aaron received a new XBox 360 and Brian a new video iPod. They both had lots of fun with their new toys, but their minds were elsewhere. The days following Christmas weren’t much better as Aaron’s relatives didn’t leave until late on Tuesday.

Both boys were up early on Wednesday and quickly went about pestering their parents to allow Brian to spend the day at Aaron and Adam’s and sleep over that night. It was to be his first sleep-over. Brian’s parents were more than happy to get their teenaged son out of their hair for a couple of days, but Aaron’s parents were a much harder sell.

“What difference does it make whether Brian and I have sex behind my closed door during the day, or during the night?” Aaron pointed out somewhat smugly.

“It’s not just about having sex, Aaron,” Jim Johnson began. “It’s about relationships and trust. You’re just too young to spend the night with a lover, whether it’s a boy or a girl.”

“But why, dad? If I’m old enough to have sex with my boyfriend in my own bedroom, why can’t we sleep together? We love each other, you know. It’s not like we’re going to do anything with each other overnight that we haven’t already done. I made a promise to Mom, and I swear I’ll stick by that promise.”

“And what are we going to tell Adam when he asks if his girlfriend can spend the night?”

“Yeah, what are we going to tell him, Ruth?” Mr. Johnson said as he turned to his wife.

“He’s too young to be having sex anyway.”

“He’s only a year younger than Brian,” Jim replied, “and then what about next year?”

“It’s not like Jenny’s parents’ll let her spend the night with me anyway,” Adam interjected, surprising both his parents and Aaron, since no one had heard him enter the room, “but can I at least have sex with her behind my closed bedroom door?”

“Adam, like I just said, you’re still too young.”

“But Jenny and I would have already had sex by now if she’d been willing.” Adam blushed a crimson red as he suddenly realized what he’d just admitted. “I can’t believe I just said that. Don’t worry, I’m not saying I’ll defy you but, if we both want it, it’s gonna happen sooner or later. I’m not saying we’d sneak around or anything, but sometimes when we’re making out . . .” Adam’s blush returned in full force, “it’s just that it’s so hard to hold back and if she ever said, ‘yes’ and if we were alone . . . I mean . . . Damn, I don’t know what I mean!”

“I understand, Adam, I really do,” Jim said, “but you have to be responsible, even when your hormones are raging out of control.”

“So if I’m going to have sex,” Adam said with a smirk on his face as he blushed yet again, “wouldn’t you rather I be safe, too? If I promise to always use a condom, which I would anyway, will you make the same deal with me that you did with Aaron?”

“See what you got us into, Ruth?” Jim asked his wife as he raised his eyebrows.

“I just wanted our sons to be safe.”

Jim Johnson let out a big sigh. “OK, Adam, you can have the same deal that we made with Aaron.”

“YES!” Adam said as he punched his fist into the air.

“But absolutely no overnights!”

“Dad!” Aaron said in exasperation. “If we can have sex, why can’t we sleep together?”

“He does have a point, Jim,” Ruth added.

“OK, OK. I give up,” Mr. Johnson said as he threw his arms up into the air. “You and Brian can have a sleep-over but . . .”

“ALRIGHT!” Aaron shouted as he, too, fisted the air.

“BUT . . . absolutely NOT on a school night.”

Brian arrived at Aaron’s house just after ten AM.

“Hey stud.”

Aaron answered Brian with a long passionate kiss before both realized they were still standing in the doorway and potentially giving the rest of the neighborhood a show. They retreated inside to relative safety.

Aaron grabbed Brian’s hand and forcefully tugged him toward the stairway.

“Hey Brian, aren’t you gonna stop to say ‘hi’ to your friend?” Adam called out.

Brian turned around and grinned at Adam as Aaron continued to pull him up the stairs. When they got to his bedroom, Aaron closed and locked the door. Within less than a second, the two boys were locked in each other’s embrace, passionately kissing. Clothes flew off and, within moments, they were laying naked on Aaron’s bed, kissing and groping at each other. The amount of sexual energy and love in the room was extraordinary. It had been days since the dance and weeks since they’d made love. They knew they’d like to make it last, but there was a pent-up need that urgently had to be satisfied and there would, after all, be lots of opportunities for sex during the coming night.

Aaron and Brian lay together, face-to-face, kissing each other savagely and humping their dicks against each other. It didn’t take long for Aaron to feel that familiar sensation as his balls drew up tight and his dick started to throb. “Brian, I’m gonna . . .” And with that, waves of pure pleasure wracked his body as his life juice spurted out his slit and creamed the space between their two bodies. The sensation of Aaron’s hot cum coating his stomach sent Brian over the edge, causing him to add stream after stream of cum to Aaron’s load. They were both thoroughly coated from the pelvis to their nipples by the time they came down from their highs. Afterwards, they just lay there, stuck together and continuing to kiss.

“God, Aaron, that was amazing! I love you so much, I don’t know how I ever got along without you.” Brian said as his breathing calmed.

“Nor I without you!” Aaron agreed as he slowly started to come back to earth. “You’re everything to me. You’re my life, my salvation. Brian, I know this sounds corny, but you really are my soul mate. With you around, I can move mountains. Nothing else matters when you’re with me.”

“Well, now what?” Brian said with a smile, trying to lighten the mood as the sticky sensation started to become uncomfortable. “We probably should shower.”

“Hmm . . . Maybe we could shower together.” Aaron said as he reached for his discarded boxers and started to wipe the cum off Brian’s chest.

“Sounds like it could be fun, but what would your parents think? Or Adam?”

“Well . . . my mom did say she’d respect my closed door . . . and Adam would be cool with it.”

“I doubt she meant the bathroom . . . and it’d be weird with Adam. . . . He’s my friend, after all.”

“She didn’t exclude the bathroom, either . . . and it’d be no weirder for me with Adam. . . . He’s my brother, but he’s cool. . . . You know that. Besides, it’d be fun.”

Brian shrugged. “OK, I guess.”

The two boys quickly dressed and moved across the hall to the bathroom. After locking the door, they undressed and started up the shower. Once under the water, they took turns washing each other, paying particular attention to the more personal areas of each others’ bodies. When Brian reached Aaron’s butt, he slowly started to work his slippery hand into Aaron’s crack. Aaron started to groan with pleasure. When Brian rubbed his finger over Aaron’s pucker, Aaron jumped - he’d never felt anything like it. Seeing Aaron’s reaction, Brian returned to stroking Aaron’s rosebud with his finger, driving Aaron absolutely crazy.

“Oh shit, Brian. That feels incredible.”

“Mmm. Let me try something.” Brian grabbed the soap and made his index finger slippery with soap, and then he returned to Aaron’s butt crease and resumed stroking his pucker. He then gently applied pressure and slid his finger inside Aaron’s hole. Aaron’s sense of extreme pleasure quickly turned to pain.

“Shit, Brian, that burns! GET YOUR FINGER OUTTA ME!” Aaron said as quietly as he could.

Brian felt mortified. He realized too late that soap would burn. He hugged Aaron tightly and said, “I’m sorry baby. I’m so, so sorry. I never meant to hurt you.”

“I know, Brian. I mean, I really liked what you were doing. It was so hot, but then it really hurt. It was like getting soap in your eye. Maybe next time we should use some lotion, or KY.”

“Maybe we can try it later tonight?”

“I’d like that.”

The boys finished washing each other and dried each other off. When they opened the bathroom door, Adam was across the way in his room playing a game on his computer. He turned around and smiled and winked at them. Both boys blushed furiously as they returned to Aaron’s room and locked the door.

“Now whaddaya wanna do?” Brian asked. Both boys’ erections had gone down during the burning incident and they knew they had all day and all night to make love to one another.

“Would you like to play with my new XBox 360?”

“Sure, that’d be cool”

Aaron fired up the XBox and loaded one of the limited titles available for it. “The graphics don’t look that much better than the old XBox, because you really need to hook it up to an HDTV to get the full effect. You know, Brian, my sixteenth birthday is coming up in March and I really could use a nice 42-inch plasma screen to go with my new XBox.”

“Dream on. I’d do anything for you, my boy, but I don’t think they’d allow us conjugal visits once they put me behind bars for robbing the bank.”

Aaron chuckled as they unsuccessfully attempted to play the new game. After a while, he ejected the DVD and got out his old Halo 2 disk and loaded it instead. It might not be new, but it was still a great game and they had a blast playing it. They took a brief break for a lunch of PB&J sandwiches, and then went back at it for the rest of the afternoon. It wasn’t sex, but they had a great time. In truth, it was really the first time that they just spent time being together - not sex, not talking - just having fun.

After dinner, Aaron’s mother dropped the boys off at the Cineplex - the very “scene of the crime” where the boys first eyed each other. They ran into Larry and Cindy and decided to go together - a double date as Larry put it. The movie was just OK, but that didn’t really matter. They sat near the back and once the lights were down, Larry and Cindy started really going at it. Brian pointed it out to Aaron and then started moving his face toward Aaron’s.

“Are you crazy? What if someone we know sees us?” Aaron whispered.

“First of all, who’s gonna see us when it’s this dark and, second of all, there are advantages to having long hair.”

Aaron realized Brian was right and this time it was Aaron who moved in for the kill. They held hands and kissed passionately throughout most of the movie, stealing glances at the screen only once and a while.

After the movie was over, they grabbed a snack and some sodas at the food court, and talked for a while, enjoying each other’s company. They talked about the GSA dance, about Christmas with their families and about what kind of car Aaron wanted to drive once he got his license - not that he expected to get a car, but it was fun to dream.

With New Year’s Eve only a few days away, they made plans to get together for a movie. Aaron and Brian agreed that they would try to get their parents to go along with another sleep-over. After a while, they called Larry’s dad, who took them all home.

Once inside, Aaron and Brian ran up the stairs and proceeded to get ready for bed. They wished Adam and Aaron’s parents a good night and then returned to Aaron’s room, closed and locked the door. No need for pretenses - no need for a cot or a sleeping bag - the boys would be sleeping together in Aaron’s bed. It would be their first night together. They got naked, slipped under the covers and nestled up together. This more than anything - more than sex even - was the most precious thing of all. They locked lips in a passionate open-mouth kiss as they let their hands roam over each other’s bodies.

Aaron reached down and gently fondled Brian’s raging hard-on. Brian let out a soft moan of pleasure. He then reached down and returned the favor, causing Aaron to do the same. They both slowly stroked each other, sending waves of pleasure through their bodies, but keeping the pace slow - just slow enough to keep from pushing each other over the edge. They continued kissing and stroking for the longest time - they wanted to make this last.

Eventually Brian broke the kissing and reached around and nibbled on Aaron’s ear. “You ever think about getting it pierced?”

“Not really, but if you’d like it. . . .”

“Ooh, I think you’d look so sexy with a little stud in your ear. And maybe some nipple rings too?”

“I think I’ll stick to my ear,” Aaron said and both boys laughed.

Brian kissed Aaron on the neck and the shoulder, then licked his way down to Aaron’s left nipple, which he sucked into his mouth and bathed with his tongue. He moved over to the right nipple and did the same. “Yeah, nipple rings would be hot.”

“Well, maybe when we’re older, but you gotta promise me that if I do it, you’ll do it too.”

“Promise,” Brian barely eked out as he resumed tonguing his way down to Aaron’s belly button. He licked deep into Aaron’s navel, then went lower and deeply inhaled the scent of Aaron’s pubes. Aaron was leaking precum like crazy. “You ready with the condoms, babe?”

Aaron grabbed one from the pack and handed it to his lover, who carefully unrolled it over Aaron’s throbbing member. Brian then went down on Aaron’s cock and swallowed it deep into his throat, then sucked upward as he slowly withdrew. He licked the tip of his tongue along the sensitive underside of Aaron’s dick, just below the slit. He licked his way back down the underside, and took Aaron’s balls into his mouth, one at a time.

“Brian,” Aaron croaked, “would you like to maybe do a 69?”

“No babe. Right now I want to concentrate on pleasuring you. Let this be my treat to you, and then maybe later you can return the favor.” Brian went back down on Aaron’s raging hard-on, slowly sucking up and down, driving Aaron crazy. He then went back to work on Aaron’s balls, and then licked the sensitive area behind his balls. He looked up and asked, “Aaron, could you hand me the lube?”

Remembering what they had talked about in the shower, Aaron reached into his night-stand, tore off the giftwrap from the oblong box his mother had given him, and handed the tube inside to Brian, who took it and squeezed a dollop onto his index finger. He placed his finger on Aaron’s anus, causing him to gasp. He then gently pushed against his pucker until the sphincter gave way, letting the offending finger inside.

Aaron couldn’t believe the new sensation that was coursing through his body. It felt kinda like he had to shit, but it was also exciting. There was a little pain, but mostly a feeling of pleasure. Brian pushed further into Aaron, gently stroking higher and higher up into his rectum. When he reached his prostate, Aaron gasped loudly.

Brian removed his finger and asked, “Are you OK?”

“Hell yeah, I’m OK. That was awesome. What did you just do? That felt incredible. . . . I almost came just from that. Get that finger back in there!

Brian wasn’t about to let his boyfriend down. He reinserted his finger and started slowly finger-fucking his lover in the ass, making sure to rub the bump inside that caused Aaron such intense pleasure.

“Brian, I’m getting close.”

Hearing that, Brian moved his mouth back to Aaron’s dick, taking it deep inside and applying vigorous suction, nearly ripping the condom off in the process. He continued to thrust his finger in and out of Aaron’s asshole as he slid his mouth up and down on Aaron’s dick in perfect synchrony. Aaron’s balls drew up tight and his back arched as he let out a low-pitched, long and load moan. Brian felt Aaron’s dick thicken and he felt jet after jet of thick, juicy cum fill the condom. Some cum even leaked out around base of Aaron’s dick. It was by far the most cum he’d ever seen Aaron make. He couldn’t believe it.

Brian moved back up to look at Aaron’s face. His eyes were closed and Brian swore he was asleep. Was his orgasm that intense that it wiped him out? He gently kissed the tip of Aaron’s nose, Aaron’s eyes fluttered open and a smile spread across his face. Brian moved in and planted a gentle kiss on Aaron’s lips, and then the two boys began kissing passionately.

Aaron broke the kiss just long enough to say, “Man, Brian. I’ve run out of words to describe what you just did to me. Awesome doesn’t come close. Fantastically majorly incredibly insanely awesome falls far short. I’ve never, ever felt anything like that. What can I say except I love you. And even that doesn’t come close to expressing the feelings I have for you.”

Brian’s response came in a whisper, “Aaron, like you said before, I want this to last forever. I know in my heart that we were meant to be together.”

The boys then resumed kissing until Aaron broke away and started kissing his way down Brian’s neck, his nipples, his belly and then the base of his dick. Aaron inhaled deeply the scent of Brian. If someone could bottle that scent, they’d make a fortune! He rolled a condom over Brian’s dick, and then he took it into his mouth, repeating Brian’s oral and anal ministrations, nearly to the exact detail. By the time it was over, Brian was experiencing the most intense orgasm of his young life, sending load after load of his seed into the condom in Aaron’s mouth.

Afterwards, the boys lay side-by-side and talked for a little while. Mere words couldn’t begin to compare to what they had just experienced, but they loved hearing the sound of each other’s voices and listening to each other. They were truly in love and loved sharing each other’s thoughts. After perhaps an hour of speaking endearments to one another, they slowly drifted off to sleep.

Later, during the night, Aaron awoke to the sensation of something poking him in the ass. He felt Brian’s arm around his chest and felt Brian humping him from behind, the tip of Brian’s hard-on sliding up and down his crack. He wasn’t sure if Brian was awake or asleep, but it felt hot and his own dick started to spring to life. He reached for Brian’s hand and slowly moved it to touch his own dick. At first Brian seemed to just lay there, humping away, but then he felt Brian stir and Brian wrapped his hand around Aaron’s dick and slowly started to stroke him in sync with his humping.

He got into a perfect rhythm of stroking and humping and Aaron started humping on his own in sync, thrusting back as Brian thrust forward and forward as Brian’s hand stoked downward. The sensation for both boys was incredible. Soon Brian was spurting cum all over Aaron’s back and Aaron spurted his own cum into Brian’s hand and onto the sheets in front of him. He thought about the mess they’d made and he really wanted to clean it up, but he was too sated from his release and both boys fell back to sleep - Brian’s dick still sitting in Aaron’s crack and his hand cupping Aaron’s dick and balls.

The next thing Aaron knew, it was morning and his room was bathed in sunlight. He felt something touching his early morning hard-on and quickly realized that Brian was still spooned up behind him with his arm over his chest and his hand lightly cupping his dick and balls. He also realized that he needed to piss badly, but when he tried to move, he found that he was stuck to Brian. He couldn’t move Brian’s hand from his genitals without pulling out a bunch of his pubes - ouch! His back side seemed to be glued to Brian’s abdomen, but he really needed to pee! He ripped Brian’s hand from his dick, enduring a flash of pain, and pulled himself from Brian, hearing Brian growl in return.

He threw on his robe and quickly made his way across the hall to relieve himself. After he was done he opened the door to find Brian waiting right outside, still stark naked. Brian pushed Aaron back into the bathroom closed the door behind them, and locked it.

“Are you crazy, prancing around the house in the nude?” Aaron asked.

“Do you have any idea what time it is? It’s after ten! Your parents are at work and the only one here is Adam. He knocked on your door right after you got up. He’s already seen me naked and, besides which, who cares?”

“Wanna take a shower?”

“Just let me piss and then I’d love to.”

Aaron adjusted the water and stepped inside, followed by Brian. They lathered each other up and washed each other thoroughly, wiping the dried cum from each other’s bodies. Brian sensuously started to lick his way down Aaron’s chest, circling each nipple with his tongue. Aaron moaned with appreciation. Brian continued to work his way down and started circling Aaron’s glans, causing him to nearly lose it right there.

“Brian, wait! We don’t have condoms!” But Brian didn’t listen to Aaron as he took Aaron’s dick deep into his throat. Thinking he didn’t hear, Aaron tried to force Brian’s head off his dick as he repeated. “Stop, Brian. We promised! I want us to be safe!” But Brian kept on sucking, bobbing up and down as he played with Aaron’s balls. Soon Aaron was beyond the point of no return. His balls drew up tight and he let out a scream as jet after jet of his cum shot into Brian’s waiting mouth. Brian sucked down every last drop, and then he stood back up and kissed Aaron deeply, sharing the remnants of Aaron’s cum with him.

“I’m sorry, babe. I know you promised your mom to always use protection. I respect that, but I got carried away. I wanted you so bad, and I wanted to taste you more than anything in the world. I trust you, and I know that I’m your first, just as you’re my first. I have nothing to worry about, and neither do you, but I also understand that you’re going to keep your promise. That’s one thing I love about you. You don’t need to stop being safe just because I did this one time, and if it’ll make your feel better, I’ll try very hard not to do this again.

Aaron couldn’t help but cry when he heard Brian’s wonderful words. He kissed Brian deeply and the kiss became more and more passionate. He eventually broke the kiss and started kissing Brian’s neck and nibbling on his ear. He started kissing his way down Brian’s chest, sucking and licking around each nipple, causing Brian to moan loudly. He gently tongued Brian’s navel, and then teased the tip of Brian’s dick with his tongue.

“Aaron, no! You don’t have to do this!” But Aaron wasn’t taking no for an answer, he swallowed Brian in one smooth motion and started sucking and bobbing furiously as he played with Brian’s balls. Soon he was rewarded with a generous load from Brian’s spasming organ.

After recovering and kissing each other gently, Brian said, “Aaron, you shouldn’t have done that. You had nothing to prove to me. I know you love me, and I respect the promise you made to your mom. I feel awful that you broke your promise on my account.”

“Don’t feel bad. . . . It was my decision to do it. After what you did to me and after you shared your cum with me, I just had to taste you, too. I know I shouldn’t have broken my promise. . . . I’ve rarely ever broken the promises I’ve made to my parents, but I just couldn’t help myself . . . and I trust you implicitly. The fact is we were both virgins before we met and I want no one else but you.

“But I did make a promise, and I guess we’d better make this our last unsafe time . . . at least until we’re old enough to make a total commitment to each other. . . . Not that I’m not committed to you already, but I think maybe we’re too young to go to that level, yet. So let’s make today the last time, and let’s get the hell outta’ here. The water’s freezing!” They quickly dried each other off, brushed their teeth and then went downstairs to get some breakfast, still in their birthday suits. Adam was down in the kitchen, himself dressed only in boxers.

“You guys are such sex maniacs. Do you have any idea how hard it was to sleep with all that racket last night? I wouldn’t doubt that Mom and Dad are having second thoughts after last night. And then again this morning in the shower!” Both Brian and Aaron were blushing furiously as their dicks started rising to attention once again. Adam continued, “You guys are such pervs.”

“And don’t you know it?”

The three boys laughed as Aaron and Brian proceeded to grab some cereal. They sat at the kitchen table across from each other and rested their feet in each other’s naked crotches. Neither boy had much of a sexual appetite at this point, but this was a new and very sexy sensation they were feeling - one they would definitely want to repeat when they weren’t so spent. After they finished their breakfast, they went back upstairs and played another round of Halo, both of them still in the nude. They broke briefly for lunch at two o’clock, then went back to playing Halo the rest of the day, enjoying the sight and feel of each other’s skin. Finally, it was getting close to the time when Aaron’s parents would be home and they reluctantly got dressed and said their goodbyes.

By the time New Year’s Eve came around, Larry had arranged for a party at his place. Larry’s parents were going to a party at the Hyatt and then staying there for the rest of the 3-day weekend, so he suggested that both couples return to his house after going out to a movie to celebrate the New Year together. His sister and her 18-year-old boyfriend would be joining them and serving as a chaperone for the younger couples. Brian and Aaron were a bit disappointed, as that meant that they’d probably have little or no opportunity for sex, but they figured it would be fun anyway. Still, Aaron brought along a pack of condoms, just in case.

After returning from the movie, they lit all eight candles in the Epstein’s menorah in celebration of the final night of Chanukah. The three couples played a game of Monopoly and then played charades. When midnight arrived, Brian and Aaron kissed passionately as the other two couples did the same. Larry’s parents had left a bottle for them and they sipped champagne. They put on some old music from the ‘60’s and ‘70’s and danced until the wee hours of the morning.

Larry’s sister’s boyfriend surprised the hell out of everybody when he suggested that they all sleep as couples in separate bedrooms. Aaron and Brian quickly laid claim to the guest room, but were too tired to do anything and quickly fell asleep.

When they finally stirred and the sun was high in the sky, everyone took turns in the bathroom and then they all went out to a pancake place for a late brunch. They spent the afternoon seeing a couple movies at the Cineplex, having ‘dinner’ there as well. They returned home and watched another movie.

Aaron awoke with a start when the movie ended and looked around to see that everyone else had fallen asleep, too. He woke everyone up and suggested that they get ready for bed. He and Brian returned to the guest room and prepared for a night of pleasure. Before they’d even gotten started, they heard a loud moan that was the unmistakable sound of Larry’s orgasm.

Both boys laughed hysterically at that and Brian said, “A little quick on the draw, that boy. I’ll find out from him tomorrow, but I bet it was his first time.”

They then heard a knock on one of the other doors, followed by some whispering, and then a knock on their own door, followed by Larry’s sister saying, “Guys, keep it down, OK?”

“OK,” replied Brian. They snickered quietly and became serious as they gazed into each other’s eyes. They kissed passionately for a long time. They both felt elated, but a little exhausted and neither one seemed to be interested in foreplay. Aaron flipped himself over and rolled a condom onto Brian’s dick, taking it into his mouth. Brian did the same and they got into a slow, steady rhythm of humping each other’s faces. Gradually they sped up until they both shot intense loads of cum into their condoms. They returned to kissing, but soon drifted off to sleep.

After what seemed like a short while there came a knock on the door. “Guys, it’s nine o’clock and my parents will be home in less than two hours!” Grudgingly, Brian and Aaron got up and took their turns showering and getting ready. They went downstairs and were finishing up their cereal when Larry’s parents walked in the door.

“Hello everyone. Did you all have a good time?”

“We sure did,” Larry replied.

“And I’m sure you didn’t do anything we wouldn’t have,” his father stated in jest.

“Not at all,” Larry’s sister said as they all blushed.

After chatting for a while, Larry’s mother took the boys to Aaron’s house. As Aaron and Brian approached the front door, Adam came rushing out. He spoke to them very quietly, “Hey, guys. I don’t know what’s up, but Mom and Dad want to talk to the two of you, alone.” Aaron and Brian’s eyes opened as wide as saucers as they looked past Adam to see Jim Johnson, standing in the doorway.

“Hi Dad, what’s up?” Aaron asked timidly.

“Hi boys. Would the two of you come and sit in the living room for a minute. I have a few things I want to talk over with both of you.”

The tension in both Aaron and Brian rose to their throats as they followed Aaron’s dad inside and sat glumly, side by side on the sofa. Ruth Johnson sat across the room in her favorite chair and smiled pleasantly at them as they waited for her husband to sit in the chair beside her.

“First of all, what I have to say is between the two of you and the two of us,” Jim Johnson began. “I wanted to give you a chance to ask questions in confidence. What I’m about to tell you today, I’ll tell Adam separately when we’re through.

“I think it’s important for you to understand that although we’re comfortable with people who are gay, in my case the reasons are personal. When I was a boy a little younger than Adam, I had my first sexual experience, with a cousin. There was nothing serious about the incident; he more or less just showed me how to masturbate and we did it to each other a few times, and that was it. By the time I was your age, I knew I liked girls. My cousin on the other hand was gay and ended up in a pretty serious relationship with another boy. Once my uncle, his father, found out, he physically assaulted his son. Poor Benny suffered severe head trauma and remains in a group home to this day.”

Both boys shuddered at the thought of what Brian’s father might do to them if he found out about their relationship. Aaron felt his boyfriend’s particular distress and gently pulled Brian into his side. Brian’s heart melted from the warmth and love he felt in Aaron’s arms.

“Brian, I know you’re afraid of what your dad might do if he finds out you’re gay. What I want both of you to know is . . . if you are ever threatened, whether it be at school or by family, Ruth and I will always be here for you.

Aaron started to cry after hearing what his father had to say. He’d always loved and admired his father, but until that moment, he’d never appreciated what a truly remarkable man his father really was. Ruth and Jim both stood up as did the boys, and each boy took turns hugging each of Aaron’s parents.

After they had recovered from their emotional roller coaster, Aaron and Brian spent the rest of the day hanging out. They spent much of that time talking about the events of the weekend and about how much fun they’d had together - even the parts that didn’t involve any sex. They both agreed that this would be one New Year’s weekend they would never forget.

Little did they know just how true that would turn out to be.


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

9. Crappy New Year

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 9 - Crappy New Year

The first sign of trouble came when Brian's parents picked him up to take him home. They were surprisingly curt with Aaron and didn’t even wish him a happy New Year. They were silent in the car on the way home and they ate dinner in silence: complete silence. This was highly unusual. At minimum, his parents always chatted about their lives and Brian couldn’t understand why they didn’t ask him about the party. Finally, Brian couldn’t take it anymore and he asked, “Is anything wrong?”

Brian’s father answered, “We’ll talk about it after dinner.” That left Brian feeling very, very worried.

When dinner was over and the dishes had been cleared, Alan Sandler told his son, “Brian, there are some things we need to talk about. Let’s go sit down in the Great Room.” June Sandler joined them and they all sat down, Brian in a chair and his parents directly across from him on the sofa.

“Before we get started, Brian, is there anything you’d like to tell us?” Brian’s father continued.

“What do you mean?”

“Is there anything that you’d like to say about anything at all - something you may not have been truthful about.”

“I still don’t know what you’re talking about.”

June Sandler picked up the conversation. “I was talking to Karen Adams at our New Year’s Eve party and I mentioned the holiday dance you went to just before Christmas. She told me that her son, Jerry, went to the dance, too, but that it was the week before. She was very insistent about it and swore that she knew what she was talking about. Now I’ve never known you to lie about anything before, but I can’t think of why Karen would be lying either.”

“Son,” Brian’s father picked up the conversation, “I can call the school next week to find out when the holiday dance was, so I want you to be honest with us. This is your last chance to come clean.”

Brian’s heart sank down to the basement. He couldn’t believe it. His parents knew. His parents knew! He wanted to lie, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. His parents always seemed to be able to tell when he was lying. He hoped, perhaps, that they might accept a half-truth instead.

“Mom, Dad, I did go to a dance at the school that night. Larry and Cindy and Aaron and I all went, and you can check with their parents,” Brian replied, hoping that would satisfy his parents.

“Then why did Jerry or his mother lie to us?”

“They weren’t lying. There really was a holiday dance the week before the one we went to.” Brian felt sick as he realized he would have to explain. There was a brief moment when he felt as if he were teetering on the edge of a precipice. He knew that, no matter what he said, his father would find out about the dance. He could fib and say he and Aaron didn’t know what kind of dance they were going to, but the obvious next question would be as to why they stayed.

Brian took a deep breath as he looked down into the precipice and told his parents the truth. “The one we went to was run by the school's gay-straight alliance. Larry and Cindy are members and we all have gay friends, so we thought it might be nice to go.”

What? You went to a fag dance?”

Regaining his composure, Brian lashed out, “IT WASN’T A FAG DANCE! It was a dance for people who believe in accepting diversity! There were just as many straight kids there as gay kids, if not more. Who cares if you’re gay or straight? We’re all the same underneath it all. Larry and Cindy told me about it, and Aaron and I decided to go, too.”

“But homosexuality is a sin!” Brian’s father retorted. “It says so in the Bible! If a man lays down with a man as with a woman, they shall both be put to death.”

“As should the adulterer, or anyone who commits a host of sins,” Brian replied. “And what about slavery? Do you really believe that God condones slavery, even though it says so in the Bible?”

“I believe that God did at one time. Not so much condoned it as set down rules for fair treatment of slaves, but that was a different time and it set the stage for something very important - the coming of the Messiah. To a large extent, Jesus changed all that, but that doesn’t mean that adultery and homosexuality aren’t still sins.”

“I can’t speak for adultery, but what is it about homosexuality that makes it wrong? It’s not like people have a choice.”

Why the hell not? Just as you can choose not to be an adulterer, you can choose not to be a faggot.”

“Dad, it’s not like kids wake up one morning and decide, ‘Hey, I think I’ll be gay. It’ll be lots of fun to be rejected by everyone and to take a chance on being beaten to death.’ No, Dad, there’s a big difference between the act of cheating on your wife or your husband and being gay. The former is a choice. You’re not born to be an adulterer, but you are born gay. I just don’t believe that the Old Testament condemnation against homosexuality is any more valid today than is its acceptance of slavery. Like you said, Jesus changed all that.”

“What you’re saying is a perversion of God’s will, and I won’t have it. I may not be able to change your mind on queers, but I sure as Hell don’t have to condone it. From now on you’re to have no involvement with this Gay-Straight Alliance. Do I make myself clear?”

“Perfectly, Dad. You’re a bigot, so I can’t accept my friends’ diversity.”

“Don’t you talk back to me, Brian, and don’t tell me what I am. I’m a God fearing Christian, and so are you. You lied to us in going to the fag dance, and you’re not going to lie to us again. You’re grounded through the end of this month - no TV, no going out after school, no phone calls to your friends and no Internet or IM chatting. Now give me your cell phone.”

Having no choice, Brian complied. “Dad, Mom, at the time I thought I had a good reason to lie to you. You would have never let me go to that dance. But since you feel so strongly about it, I give you my word I won’t lie to you again and if the price of keeping my friends is to not be a part of the GSA, then that’s what I’ll do.”

“That’s what I wanted to hear, but we’re very concerned about the influence your friends are having on you. For one thing, we don’t want you associating with anyone who belongs to that fag alliance, and that includes Larry and Cindy.”

“But Dad! Larry and I have been friends since the second grade! I won’t stop being his friend just because you tell me to! He’s like a brother to me.”

“Son, I know Larry can't help being raised as a Jew and I have nothing against him personally that way, but when he drags you along to a fag dance . . . well, that’s just something we’re not going to tolerate. We’re willing to give him a second chance, but only if he drops that GSA crap. If you want me to, I’ll talk to his parents, but in the meantime, you’re not to have contact with him outside of school. Am I clear about that?”


“Brian!” Mrs. Sandler exclaimed just as her husband’s hand slapped loudly as it came into contact with Brian’s face. Brian burst into tears.

June Sandler turned angrily to her husband. “Alan, I will not have you hitting our son.” She turned back to Brian and said, “Brian, you owe your father an apology. It wasn’t right for him to hit you, but you absolutely cannot say things like that to him. Never, ever! Apologize to him this instant.”

“I’m sorry, Dad,” Brian replied as his crying started to subside. “I didn’t mean to call you an asshole. I just think you’re being so unfair.”

“Brian, don’t you dare ever call me that again! I’ve never hit you before, and I shouldn’t have hit you now, but you can't go around swearing at your parents. You may not agree with us, but you have to respect us. We’re you’re parents!”

June then turned to her husband and said, “And?”

“And I’m sorry. I’m sorry I hit you. I promise not to do that again.”

“OK, then,” Mrs. Sandler said as she turned to face her husband. “Alan, don’t you think you’re being a bit harsh? Larry is his best friend, and it’s not like he’s gay or anything. They’ve been friends for half their lives and you can’t expect them to stop being friends, even if we believe that one of them is making a mistake. Sure, you can talk to Bill about it, but you can’t expect them to believe as we do.

“Our son is a good boy, and we’ve raised him in a loving, Christian home. We’ve done all we can do, but he’s going to come into contact with people like Larry in this world and he’s going to have to preserve his beliefs in the face of all the temptations out there. We have to cut him a little slack on this.”

“I don’t agree with you, June,” Mr. Sandler replied. He turned back to his son and sighed, “Against my better judgment, I’m going to let you continue to be friends with Larry . . . but I’ll be watching you, and this could change if you betray our trust. Is that clear?” Brian nodded with little enthusiasm. “Now on the other hand, you also said you have gay friends, and that’s where I draw the line. I don’t want you associating with anyone you know to be a queer.”

“Does it really matter? It’s not like I can catch being gay from them.”

“Yes it does, Brian,” his mother interjected. “We don’t want you associating with kids who turn their backs on God. You can’t always know who’s a sinner, but if you know kids at school who are homosexuals, then you know that they have succumbed to Satan’s call and you have to stay away from them, lest they talk you into following the same dark path.”

She shuddered as she continued, “I hope you haven’t already, and if you have or think you might, all you have to do is tell us and we’ll get you some help. . . . we know you want to do the right thing.” Brian’s face drained of its color when he heard this, but he did his best to maintain his composure as his mother spoke. “By the way, didn’t you say that Aaron doesn’t have a girlfriend and he wanted you to go to the dance with him? Is he one of your gay friends?”

Brian wanted to shout out that he wasn’t, but as a confused, love-struck fourteen-year-old, all he could manage to do was to look down. Having said nothing, the answer was obvious to his parents.

“Brian,” Alan Sandler said as he looked at his son, “We absolutely forbid you to have any contact with Aaron Johnson. I know you’re also a friend of Adam, but you cannot go over to their house until Aaron gets some help and sees the error of his ways. Of course, you can have Adam over here any time you want, but you need to steer clear of Aaron. Am I clear about that?”

“I’m not going to turn my back on Aaron. He’s a good friend - a God-fearing Christian like you, who just happens to be gay.”

“If you were a friend, you’d try to help him turn straight.” Mr. Sandler sighed and continued, “But since you believe he was born that way and can’t turn straight, I know that’s not going to happen, is it? So we really have no choice. You’re to stay away from him, and I don’t want to hear anything about you being with him behind our backs.”

“But Dad!” Brian exclaimed as the tears started to flow again.

“Don’t you ‘But Dad’ me. I don’t want him perverting you. And that goes for anyone else at school you know or think might be gay. You’re a good Christian boy and I’ll not have you choosing to go down the path of the devil. You already agreed to take Jesus into your heart when you were baptized, but there are temptations out there and you will face them all your life. You need to learn now, while you’re still young, to resist temptation and remain true to the oath you took when you accepted Jesus as your savior.

“Besides, I think it’s high time you start dating girls. You’re a popular boy, and very handsome. There must be dozens of girls who would be thrilled to go out with you.”

“D-a-d . . .” Brian said as he blushed.

“Seriously, Brian, you’re a good looking boy. I think any girl would be thrilled to go out with you. Do you have anyone in mind?”

“Actually, there is a girl I’ve been thinking of asking out,” Brian said as he thought of ways he could use Sharon as an excuse to see Aaron.

“Then ask her out. Don’t waste time. Show Aaron that you have no interest in his destructive way of life. “Now I think we’re done here,” Mr. Sandler said to bring things to a close. “Since you’re grounded, why don’t you go up to your room.”

Later that evening, a little over a mile away, Aaron was still pondering why Brian's dad had acted so strangely, when his own father entered his room. “Well, I just had an interesting conversation with Brian’s father. It seems that he thinks you’re a filthy pervert and he doesn’t want you perverting his son.”

“What?” Aaron said with surprise.

“I’m sorry, son, but apparently the Sandlers found out about the dance you went to with Brian. It sounds like they still don’t realize that their son is gay, or perhaps they’re in denial, but the one thing that’s clear is that they want no part of you. They won’t let Brian talk to you, chat or IM with you or physically spend any time with you. He’s grounded through the end of the month for lying to them, but even after that, they don’t want the two of you having any contact with each other. That is unless you get some help and turn straight.”

Aaron was stunned. He didn’t know what to say. All he could do was to sit there as the tears began to flow.

“That’s it, son. Let it out.”

Aaron flung himself into his father’s arms and cried in earnest. He cried for what seemed like hours as his father held him tightly and rubbed his back. Finally the tears started to subside and Aaron regained his voice. “Dad, I can’t go on without Brian. I love him. We can’t be apart. We’re made for each other. I don’t know what to do.”

“Just give it time, Aaron. Brian’s parents may not understand, but if I know their son, he won’t let it drop. Give it time and they’ll eventually come around.”

“Isn’t there something you can do? You said you’d always be there for us.”

“I know I did, Aaron, and I will be, but unless Brian’s parents threaten direct harm to either of you, there isn’t a lot I can do.” He squeezed Aaron more tightly and continued, “Aaron, there are some things that just take time. When the time is right, I’ll be there for the both of you. I know it in my heart. It’s not a matter of ‘if’, but ‘when’. Just remember the old saying: “love conquers all.’”

“I wish I could believe it, Dad. I wish I could believe it.”

“Remember too Aaron, that your Mom and I love you.”

“I know that more than anything Dad. I think I have the best parents and brother in the world.”

The second week of Christmas break was torture for both boys. Aaron couldn’t stand not having any contact with Brian and he became despondent. He could only imagine what Brian was going through. Finally, the winter break was over and he returned to school. Aaron met Brian in their usual spot in front of the Library.

“I’m sorry, Aaron,” Brian started, “I didn’t mean to out you to my parents. It just happened.”

“That’s OK, Brian. I understand. You wouldn’t have told them yourself and I’m sure they just put two and two together once they knew we went to the GSA dance.”

“That’s exactly what happened. And it sucks big time.”

“Yeah, it does. Now if we could only find a way to suck.”

Brian laughed at Aaron’s double entendre as he continued. “It’s really amazing that they haven’t confronted me about being gay. I mean if you’re gay and we went to the dance together, then I guess they feel that because I’m a good ‘Christian’ boy, that I’m straight and you’re trying to pervert me, you pervert.” Aaron chuckled.

“And get this - they want me to start dating so you’ll know I have no interest in being gay,” Brian continued as Aaron started laughing hysterically. “Shhh. We don’t want anyone tipping my parents off about our meeting like this. In fact, we’d probably better find a more private place to meet in the morning. But my ‘dating’ could also provide the perfect cover for us seeing each other.”

“But how?” Aaron wondered aloud.

“Quite simple. Remember Sharon, the lesbian girl we met at the GSA?”

“Yeah, I think so. Is that the girl you spent a bit of time talking to?”

“Yeah, that’s the one. She isn’t out to her parents, either, and likes to go out with gay guys for cover. She has a girlfriend, Jackie, and maybe we could double-date - that is if you wouldn’t mind going out with a black girl.”

“You know I have nothing against African-Americans . . . it’s the ‘girl’ part I don’t like, but I guess I can do it if it’ll provide cover for our relationship.”

“Here’s what we’ll do. After I’m done being grounded, I’ll start dating Sharon and you can date Jackie. We could then arrange to meet up and swap dates. Sharon’s and my parents would never know the difference.”

“That might work.”

“And then maybe after a while, we could arrange to ‘bump’ into each other in front of my parents. You could tell me you realized you’re really straight after all and then maybe they’d feel more comfortable with the two of us spending time together. I hate lying to my folks and they’ll probably ground me till I’m eighteen if they find out, but for now it’s probably the only way.”

“Let’s go for it!” Aaron said with the first enthusiasm he’d felt in more than a week, just as the bell rang.


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

10. Deception

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 10 - Deception

February 3, 2006 - It was a day that would be deeply etched into Aaron’s mind for the rest of his life. It was the first time he would ever know the incredible joy of having the love of his life inside of him. And it was the last.

The rest of January had passed slowly and he and Brian continued to meet clandestinely before the start of classes each morning, but had little contact otherwise. Once Brian was finally allowed to go out, they wasted no time in formulating a plan to get together. Not only that, but they were anxious to finally go all the way, not knowing when they might have the opportunity again. Aaron’s parents were going out of town for the weekend and his brother was spending the night at Larry’s house. He and Brian would have complete privacy, and no one else would have to know about it. They agreed that this would be so perfect.

The trick was to come up with a believable and rock-solid ruse so that Brian’s parents wouldn’t suspect anything. Setting up a double date with Sharon and Jackie was the easy part, but finding a way to turn it into an evening in the sack with Brian was going to be more complicated.

Fortunately, Jackie was out to her parents and they were used to shuttling her so-called boyfriends around so that she could spend time with Sharon. So a plan was formulated for Brian’s parents to drop Brian and Sharon off at the mall, where they would have dinner and then supposedly go to a show at the Cineplex across the way. Jackie’s parents would do the same with Aaron and Jackie, and then go shopping while the kids got a quick bite. Rather than the kids all going to a movie, however, Jackie’s parents would then drop Brian and Aaron off at Aaron’s house before taking Sharon and Jackie back to their own place. Later, Jackie’s parents would drop Brian and Sharon back at the mall, where they would be picked up by Brian’s parents.

And so that’s what they set out to do. Brian’s parents drove Brian over to Sharon’s house, where he met her parents for the first time. They were good ‘Christian’ parents and seemed to be pleased that she was going out with such a fine and religious young man. Brian’s parents similarly had a nice chat with Sharon on the way to the mall, which was about five miles away. They seemed to take a real liking to her and thought she was a very nice Christian girl - a perfect date for Brian.

In the meantime, Jackie’s parents picked up Aaron and he had a chance to meet Jackie for the first time. He could instantly see why Sharon was attracted to her - she was large-breasted and had amazingly deep brown eyes and a smile that seemed to communicate warmth. She had a sweet personality and was very likable. Her parents were also nice and were very open about their daughter’s relationship with Sharon, just as his were about his relationship with Brian.

After a quick meal at the food court, the two couples were joined by Jackie’s parents and Aaron and Brian were soon back at Aaron’s house, alone. Once inside, they were locked in a passionate embrace before they’d even closed the door. Aaron pounced forward and sealed his lips with Brian’s, thrusting his tongue deep into his boyfriend’s loving mouth. Brian reciprocated and he aggressively slid his arms up and down . . . too many layers of clothing.

He broke their lip-lock and gazed seductively into Aaron’s eyes as he said, “I don’t know how you feel, but I think you’re wearing way too many clothes.”

Aaron stared seductively back at his lover as he reached forward and slowly unzipped Brian’s jacket. He slid it off his sweetheart’s shoulders and let it drop to the floor and then he unbuttoned the buttons on Brian’s flannel shirt, one by one, and un-tucked the hem of the shirt, sliding it too, from his shoulders to the floor.

As Aaron started to reach forward to pull Brian’s tee-shirt out from inside his pants, Brian shook his head and said, “Uh, uh, uh . . . Not so fast, lover boy.”

Brian reached forward and unzipped Aaron’s jacket and slid it down to the floor. He then pulled Aaron’s pull-over up and over his head, and then spun it around and tossed it aside. He placed his right hand on Aaron’s chest and then slid it over and cupped Aaron’s pec, slowly massaging the nipple using the palm of his hand. Aaron softly moaned his appreciation. Brian slowly moved his hand downward, stopping briefly to rest it on Aaron’s belt. Bringing his left hand up, he unbuckled Aaron’s belt and then unbuttoned and unzipped Aaron’s pants, letting them slide down to rest around Aaron’s ankles. Aaron toed off his sneakers and stepped out of his pants, kicking them to the side and out of the way.

Not wanting to miss out on the fun, Aaron reached forward and unbuckled Brian’s belt, and then unbuttoned and unzipped Brian’s jeans. Brian toed off his shoes and stepped out of his jeans, and then kicked them out of the way. Aaron reached down to the hem of Brian’s tee-shirt and Brian lifted his arms over his head, allowing Aaron to pull the shirt off. Following his lover’s lead, he spun the shirt in a circle over his head and then tossed it randomly into the living room.

“Let’s head upstairs,” he said as he grabbed Brian’s hand and led his lover up to his bedroom. Out of habit, he closed the door behind them. He reached forward and lovingly stroked Brian’s erection through the fabric of his boxers. Brian did the same to Aaron. Not wanting to wait a second more, Brian yanked Aaron’s boxers down and Aaron stepped out of them. Aaron quickly performed the same action with Brian’s boxers.

“God, you’re beautiful,” Aaron exclaimed as he gently cupped Brian’s balls in his right hand and slowly and lovingly massaged them. “What did I ever do to deserve you?”

“It’s me who’s the lucky one,” Brian responded between their passionate kisses. “You don’t know how much I love you, and God, I’ve missed this.”

“No more than I have,” Aaron replied as he slowly led Brian to the bed. He started kissing Brian’s neck as he urged him onto his back, nibbling on his ears and kissing his way down Brian’s chest. He gently sucked Brian’s left nipple into his mouth as he teased it with his tongue and nipped it slightly with his teeth. Brian moaned appreciatively. Not wanting it to feel left out, Aaron repeated his ministrations to the right nipple.

Brian pulled Aaron’s face back up to him and forced him into a tight lip-lock. Their tongues danced with each other as they slowly and sensuously moved them in and out of each other’s mouths. This time it was Brian who started licking and kissing Aarons neck, nibbling at his ears and sucking on his nipples. He continued down Aaron’s chest and abdomen, gently swirling his tongue around his navel before playfully darting inside.

Bypassing Aaron’s raging erection, he playfully licked at Aaron’s balls and then took each of them into his mouth, gently swishing his tongue around them. Finally, after unrolling a condom onto the object of his desire, he licked his tongue up Aaron’s dick and teased the head, swirling his tongue around and around it. Aaron screamed out when Brian took his dick into his mouth and swallowed it whole. Bobbing up and down, it didn’t take long. It had been more than a month since the last time they had made love to each other and he was more than ready. Spurt after spurt of Aaron’s semen streamed into the condom - how Brian wished he could have tasted it.

As Aaron came down from his high, Brian allowed Aaron’s dick to slip out of his mouth and he returned to Aaron’s face so that they could continue to kiss passionately. They kissed and they kissed and they repeatedly admitted their undying love for one another. After a short while, it was Brian’s turn to moan and scream as Aaron worked his way down Brian’s chest. He teased Brian’s balls and finally took Brian’s condom-sheathed dick into his own mouth, sucking as if his life depended on it. Now it was Brian’s turn to fill the condom with his love juice and once again, the two were kissing like there was no tomorrow.

“Wow. Wow! WOW! That was quick, but amazing,” Brian said. “You don’t know how much I’ve missed that.”

“No more than I have, my love.” After more kissing, Aaron asked, “Are you ready for more?” as he looked deeply into his lover’s eyes.

“Beyond any shadow of a doubt,” Brian replied as leaned forward and kissed Aaron yet again. “But who’s gonna be on top?”

Aaron hadn’t really given it much thought before and he made a snap decision. “Brian, I’d love nothing more than to have you inside of me tonight. I don’t know if you’d like to try it the other way around, but this time I’d like it to be you who makes love to me. If you want, we can try it the other way next time. Please make love to me, if you think you can so soon after what we just did.”

“Oh, I can easily make love to you right now . . . a thousand times over,” Brian replied as his dick sprang back to life. “I’d love nothing more than to make love to you tonight.”

Aaron retrieved another condom and the tube of lube from his night-table He unwrapped the condom and covered his love’s organ back up, then dove for Brian’s dick and quickly swallowed it yet again, priming Brian for what was yet to come. Brian in turn dove onto Aaron’s raging erection and swallowed it whole, causing Aaron to scream out in ecstasy, forgetting for the moment that he was not wearing a condom. Brian licked Aaron’s balls and then licked his way downward as he pulled Aaron’s legs up and over his shoulders. He playfully licked at Aaron’s crack and teased his ring with the tip of his tongue. Around and around he swirled his tongue, slowly getting closer and closer to the center of Aaron’s sexual universe.

Aaron couldn’t believe the sensations coursing through his body as Brian penetrated his anus with his tongue. Brian slid his tongue in and out of Aaron’s hole, building up a rhythm that was driving Aaron insane. Just as Aaron thought he might cum without even touching himself, Brian withdrew his tongue and replaced it with his index finger. Brian slid his finger in and out, gently pressing against Aaron’s prostate, causing a steady stream of precum to pour out. He withdrew his finger, added some lubricant and resumed his finger-fucking of Aaron’s ass with two fingers, and then three. The third finger hurt a little bit at first, but the fullness more than made up for the discomfort.

“Brian, I’m ready. Please don’t make me wait any longer.” With that Brian withdrew his fingers and lubed up his condom-sheathed penis. He aimed it straight for Aaron’s waiting hole and gently, but forcefully applied pressure. Brian popped in with only a momentary shock of pain.

“Are you OK?”

“Now I am. I couldn’t be better. Take it slow, but I want to feel all of you inside of me.”

Brian was surprised at how easily his dick slid into Aaron. He’d read about taking it one inch at a time, but he felt only a little resistance and Aaron didn’t grimace once as he slid home. Aaron felt a little discomfort at first, but his excitement overrode everything else and his canal readily gave way to its intruder. Sure, there was pain, but he wasn’t about to let that stand in the way of the pleasure he was feeling, and the pleasure he knew he was giving Brian.

“Go for it, Brian. Fuck me now. Fuck me hard.”

Brian slowly and tentatively at first began to pump his dick in and out of Aaron, building speed and force as he went. Aaron moaned and screamed and Brian did so, too. The sensations that overtook both boys were beyond anything they could have ever imagined. Slowly a pressure built within Aaron’s balls, although neither he nor Brian were touching his dick. His toes curled and a tingling electric sensation worked its way from his toes to his head and to the center of his being. His balls pulled up tight and a bolt of lightning drove through his dick as his semen shot its way clear up to his chin. His anus clamped down on Brian’s thrusting dick, accentuating the feelings he himself was having. Brian soon felt his own orgasm overtake him, sending wave after wave of pleasure through him as his semen filled the condom, deep within Aaron’s ass.

As the boys recovered from their sexual bliss, Aaron looked at the clock on his nightstand and sat bolt-upright when he saw the time. “Shit! We don’t have much time! Jackie’s parents will be here in five minutes!”

“Fuck, we gotta hurry!” Brian realized. He didn’t have time for a shower and could only hope his parents didn’t jump to the wrong conclusion if he smelled of sex. Running into the bathroom, he washed his face and torso off and scrubbed his genitals before scrambling down to the living room, throwing on his clothes.

Five minutes came and went, and then ten minutes, and then twenty. The boys were starting to panic when the phone suddenly rang, causing them to practically jump out of their skins.

“You’d better answer it in case it’s your parents,” Brian said. “After all, they didn’t know you were going out tonight, let alone that I’m here,” he reminded Aaron.

Aaron picked up the phone and said, “Hello?”

“Hello, Aaron? This is Ms. Washington . . . you know, Jackie’s mother. I hate to tell you this but we think my husband’s had a heart attack. We’re at the hospital right now and I obviously can’t come pick Brian up. Sharon came here with us and is on her way back to the mall. She took a bus, but I’m afraid you’ll have to find another way. Do you think maybe you could take a cab?”

“Yeah, Ms. Washington. We’ll find a way. And I hope your husband is OK!”

“Thanks, Aaron, I appreciate that.”

“What’s going on?” Brian asked as Aaron hung up the phone.

“Jackie’s dad had a heart attack and they’re at the hospital. We’re going to have to call for a taxi to take you back to the mall.”

“Shit, we don’t have time to take a taxi!”

“Shit, you’re right! Your parents are supposed to pick you up in a fifteen minutes. A taxi’ll never come in time!”

“Fuck, what are we going to do?”

Aaron thought for a minute. “You know, Brian. I’ve driven to the mall dozens of times on my learner’s permit with my parents. And I’m only a month away from getting my license. It’s not that far. I’ll drop you off.”

“Are you sure it’s OK, Aaron? What if we get pulled over? If anything happens, my parents will definitely find out about us.”

“Sure it’s OK. Your parents’ll find out about us if we don’t get you to the mall in time. We’ll just take it slow so the cops don’t have a reason to stop us, but we have to hurry!”

Aaron nervously got into his mother’s Jetta and Brian joined him as Aaron turned the key. He backed the car out their driveway and headed down the street. This was nothing he hadn’t done before and as he drove, his level of confidence increased. As Aaron continued on, he kept stealing quick glances at his handsome boyfriend, seated right next to him, the pleasant ache in his rear end a constant reminder of the love they’d shared that evening. Brian smiled back at him and placed his left hand on Aaron’s right thigh, gently sliding his hand up and down. Both boys were lost in each other and not really paying much attention to the road ahead of them, which was becoming increasingly slick from heavy snowfall.

As they approached the intersection at Lewis and Elm on a green light, it was Brian who saw it first. Aaron immediately noticed a look of horror on Brian’s face and turned just in time to see a large SUV barreling toward them.


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

11. Emergency!

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 11 - Emergency!

Aaron slammed on the brakes, but the pavement was covered by a good two inches of snow and he couldn’t get traction, even with the aide of the Jetta’s anti-lock brakes. Time seemed to stop for Aaron as he helplessly watched events unfold. The mammoth SUV slammed into the driver’s side front fender, spinning the little Jetta to the right. Aaron’s head and torso slammed hard into the window, shattering the glass. Aaron’s vision became foggy and he felt something slam into him from the right. The momentum of the SUV dragged the Jetta forward with it, but rather than slowing down, the driver of the SUV actually sped up, forcing the Jetta to careen out of control off to the side of the road and down a slight embankment, into a telephone pole. The tiny car slammed head on into the pole, causing the front airbags to inflate. Aaron felt his body lurch forward as his head and chest made contact with the air bag from the steering wheel. Having been thrown to the left by the initial impact, Brian was still leaning against Aaron, his torso completely unrestrained. His head and shoulders rammed into the driver’s front air bag, creating a shear force between the upper and lower parts of his thoracic spine. By the time the car came to rest, both boys were unconscious. Neither one saw the SUV race away from the scene.

The next thing Aaron knew, he felt something hard being placed around his neck. His eyes were closed and he couldn’t bring himself to open them. He felt himself being lifted and moved onto something very hard on the ground, and then whatever he was on was lifted up onto something else. He was moving now and he heard the sounds of a radio or walkie-talkie or something. Everything seemed to get bright as he felt himself slide head-first into what felt like a closed space. Finally, he started to open his eyes and there were a couple of people around him, crouching next to him. He would later realize that he was in an ambulance, but for now everything was hazy as he tried to remember what had happened. Suddenly he remembered he’d been with Brian and the thought shot right through him like a jolt of electricity.

He shouted out, “Brian! Where’s Brian?!” But all he could manage was a soft mumble. He tried again, this time with more effort, “Please, where’s Brian!?”

A young man next to him responded, “Don’t worry about that for now. I’m sure your friend will be OK. Right now you just need to focus on yourself. We’ll get you to the hospital soon.”

Now Aaron was really starting to panic. He didn’t care about himself. All he cared about was Brian! He started to squirm violently - or at least as violently as he could. The paramedic next to him put his hand on the boy’s shoulder and tried to comfort him.

“You need to stay still. You were both in a pretty serious accident. Your friend is being taken in a separate ambulance. But you won’t do your friend any good if you injure yourself further before you even get to the hospital. Just rest for now. I’ve got an IV going and you’re getting something for pain and we’ll be at the hospital in no time.”

Although the drive was only about twenty minutes, to Aaron, it seemed to take forever. When they finally arrived, Aaron felt himself being slid out of the ambulance and he seemed to float into the hospital emergency department as the gurney’s wheels dropped and locked into place. He was wheeled immediately into the trauma bay and the light was absolutely blinding. He was slid across to another gurney and the back board he’d been lying on was removed. A nurse applied a blood pressure cuff to his left arm and he felt it inflate. She checked his pulse and stuck something in his ear. He heard a ripping sound and felt his clothes being removed from his body. He blushed a little bit at the thought of lying naked on the gurney.

Another nurse came up to him and said, “I’m going to stick this catheter into your bladder to drain it. It’s going to feel a little funny, but we have to do it to make sure you weren’t injured down there, and you’re not going to be able to pee on your own for a bit.” She then grabbed his dick and applied something cool to the head. He then felt something sharp against his piss slit and it felt like he was peeing marbles. He heard the sound of dripping liquid and she said, “Good, your urine’s clear. That’s a good sign.”

A young man in a white coat approached Aaron and said, “Hi, I’m Dr. Langston, but you can call me Chip if you want. I’m an intern and I’m going to be checking you over. What’s your name?”

“Aaron. Aaron Johnson.”

“Hi Aaron. It’s nice to meet you. I’m going to examine you now. After that, I’ll have some questions, OK?”


Chip then proceeded to examine Aaron in detail, listening to his heart and lungs, feeling his stomach, and checking Aaron’s ability to move his arms and legs and to distinguish between the sharp and dull ends of a safety pin. This part of the exam took more than a half-hour and when Chip was satisfied that there was nothing serious enough to require emergency surgery, he asked Aaron some simple questions about the year, who the president was and so on, just to make sure there wasn’t a brain injury. Aaron answered all questions correctly.

Just then another gurney sped by and was wheeled into place right next to him. Several doctors and nurses surrounded the new arrival and the curtains were pulled tight around him.

Aaron heard someone say, “BP 60 over 40, pulse 120. His belly’s firm. Somebody else yelled, “We need a paracentesis kit. I need it now!”

Aaron instinctively knew it was Brian and he started to sob uncontrollably.

“Brian? Is that Brian?”

Chip said, “I don’t know if that’s your friend, but I’ll try to find out for you when I can. As you can see, they’re a little busy with him right now.

“We’ve got 600 cc’s of grossly bloody drainage. We need to get this boy to surgery. Get a couple of units of type O neg blood going into him and call the OR!” Aaron heard from someone behind the curtains.

Aaron again started crying. “Is he going to be OK?”

“Aaron, trust me, they’re going to do everything possible for your friend if that’s him. I’m going to go and ask now. You might be able to help us help him.” The intern went to the next bed and returned in a few seconds. “Is Brian Sandler your friend?”

Aaron’s crying intensified.

“I know this is difficult, but Brian can’t talk right now and we need some information. Do you know if he’s allergic to anything?”

“Not that he’s ever told me.”

“Do you by any chance know his blood type?”

“I don’t even know my blood type.”

“We need to reach his parents. Do you know how to contact them?”

Aaron’s heart sank at the thought of this. They were busted. Brian’s parents would know they had been together. They’d put two and two together and that would be the end. Aaron almost cared more about this than about his injuries, but Brian needed his parents now and everything else was secondary. He gave Chip Brian’s phone number and told him that Brian’s parents were probably at the mall, looking for their son. The intern relayed the info to the emergency social worker.

Chip continued, “How about your parents. How can we reach them?”

“My parents are away for the weekend. My brother’s at a friend’s house. There’s no one at home right now.”

“Do you have any other relatives in town?” When Aaron answered no, Chip continued, “Do you know how we can reach your parents?”

“They left a number for me at home, on the kitchen counter.”

“Don’t worry about it. We’ll send the police over to retrieve it. Is there anyone else you’d like us to contact?”

“Larry. Larry Epstein. He’s a good friend of Brian and me. He’d want to be here.”

Aaron gave Chip the phone number and Chip replied that they’d call him as soon as they could. He continued, “Aaron, we’re going to be sending you for a lot of x-rays shortly. You’ll be getting so many x-rays that you’ll be glowing in the dark for the rest of the year. First we’re going to get a CT scan of your head, your spine, your chest and your belly. We need to do this to make sure that nothing’s been seriously damaged. After that, we’ll get some x-rays of your arms and legs to make sure you didn’t break anything. It’s going to take more than an hour to get all of these, so please be patient. Before you go for these, I’m going to have my attending doctor come and take a look at you and talk to you. Is that OK?”

Aaron tried to nod his head, but found he couldn’t.

“You’re in a hard collar to keep you from moving your neck, just in case it’s broken. If the x-rays check out, we’ll be able to remove it and allow you to get you up.”

Just then, Aaron heard Brian being wheeled out of the trauma bay and off to surgery. Although Aaron wasn’t sure that he believed in God any more, he said a silent prayer for Brian.

After a short while, an older guy came up to Aaron and introduced himself as Dr. Samuels. He asked Aaron a lot of the same questions that Chip had and repeated much of the same physical exam, and then told him almost exactly the same things. It all seemed a waste of time to Aaron, but he reasoned that since Chip was just an intern, someone had to verify his work.

Then he was off to X-ray and - chip had been right - it took a long time. The CT scan was kind of weird and he spent a lot of time in the machine. After he thought they were done, they injected something into his veins that made him feel really hot all over and they scanned him again. They then moved him around a lot and put rectangular plates under him as they got the rest of the x-rays. Finally, Aaron was wheeled back to the trauma bay, where he seemed to wait forever just laying there.

Eventually Chip returned and reached down to Aaron’s neck. Aaron heard the distinct sound of Velcro coming undone. Chip removed the front half of Aaron’s hard collar and Aaron immediately felt more comfortable.

“Do you feel like sitting up?” Aaron nodded his head. “OK, we’re going to take this slow. I’m going to start by raising the head of the gurney.” Once Aaron was sitting partway up, Chip helped him sit up the rest of the way and swing his legs over the side of the gurney. Aaron was still covered only with a sheet and Chip handed him a hospital gown and helped him put it on. Chip then pulled up a chair and sat facing Aaron.

“You’re extremely lucky. You have a few broken ribs, but not a single other broken bone or soft tissue injury. You’re pretty bruised up and you’ll be hurting for a quite a while from those broken ribs, but I’ll give you a prescription for some Vicodin to ease the pain. You’ve probably got a mild concussion, so you’ll feel groggy for a few days, but you should be fine after that. Do you have a pediatrician or a family doctor?” Aaron gave him the name of his doctor and Chip continued, “First thing on Monday, I want you to call her office and set up an appointment with her as soon as possible next week.” Chip handed him a card and said, “I also want you to schedule an appointment with Dr. Prentice. She’s a child and adolescent psychologist. You’ve been through a lot and you’re very likely to have some serious issues for a while. I know you were driving without a license . . .”

‘How’d he know that?’ Aaron angrily thought to himself.

“. . . and I’m sure you’re going to have trouble dealing with what happened. I’m not judging you, Aaron, and I’m sure you had a good reason to be out on the road tonight. But I also know that you’re probably going to feel stressed and perhaps a little guilty, particularly with your friend being hurt. Now from what I noticed while doing your rectal exam, I’m guessing that you’re boyfriends, right?”

Aaron blushed furiously. “It was our first time.”

“Well don’t feel guilty about it. I’m happy for the two of you and my prayers are with you and your boyfriend.”

“Thanks, Chip”

“Out of curiosity, can I ask what you were driving?”

“A Volkswagen Jetta.”

“Good car - I’ve been thinking of getting one myself. Great safety record - that car probably saved your life.” Aaron smiled briefly for the first time that night. Chip continued, “I hate to be the bearer of bad news, however, but there are some cops outside who are waiting to talk to you. Technically, you don’t have to talk to them unless your parents or a guardian are present - whether or not you talk to them is strictly up to you. There are also some people here who want to see you, and you’re free to go, but you’ll have to stay here until a parent, guardian or responsible adult comes to pick you up.” He handed Aaron a packet and said, “In here are your discharge instructions. You’ll need to stop by the cashier on your way out, but don’t worry, no one’s going to make you pay this tonight if you don’t have the money on you. Oh, and because of your concussion, please make sure someone stays with you tonight. Come back here if you experience any change in your vision or memory.”

Just then, a couple of police officers entered the trauma bay. One of them was very young and appeared to be barely out of high school. The other appeared to be in his forties, and much more seasoned. The older officer spoke to Chip and asked, “Is there someplace more private where we could go to talk to the minor?”

“You can probably use one of the grief rooms,” Chip replied.

“The grief rooms?” Aaron asked.

“It’s where we take families to deliver bad news.”

“Oh,” Aaron replied, feeling self-conscious as he was led by the police officers, wearing nothing but his boxers, socks, sneakers and a hospital gown. They guided him into an empty room and asked Aaron to be seated. The room was actually rather pleasant - it had a sofa, a love seat and a few chairs, and there were coffee and end tables with real lamps on them. A few potted plants and some artwork on the walls gave the room a feeling more akin to a living room than a room in a hospital emergency department. Aaron sat on the love seat and the officers pulled up two of the chairs and sat directly across from him.

“Aaron, I’m detective Bronson and my associate here is officer Jeffries. We’re with the sheriff’s office and we’d like to ask you a few questions. Ordinarily, we’d do this with your parents present, but since they aren’t available and won’t be for a while, would it be OK with you if we talked to you now, while events are still fresh in your mind?”

“I guess it’s OK,” Aaron said, not sure if he really had an alternative.

“Good,” Detective Bronson said. “First of all, tell us in your own words exactly what happened.”

“Well, me and Brian were driving to the mall. . . .”

“We know that you don’t have a license yet, Aaron. We found your learners’ permit in your wallet at the scene of the accident. Why were you out driving on a Friday night without a license?” Aaron turned a deep shade of red and the officer continued, “Trust me, Aaron, there’s nothing we haven’t heard or seen before. Were you and your friend out to try and pick up some girls or score some drugs?”

“NO! NEVER! I’ve never used drugs! I’ve never even drunk alcohol.”

“We kinda’ figured that, Aaron, since your drug screen came up clean, but we had to ask. So were you and Brian out to pick up girls?”

Aaron blushed and opened his mouth, but nothing came out at first. Eventually, he regained his nerve and answered, “Well, I guess you’re going to find out anyway, but Brian and I are boyfriends. But please, we don’t want this getting out at school!”

“Don’t worry, we’re not interested in your sex life and nothing you say here will be public unless we determine that you’ve done something illegal.” Aaron breathed a sigh of relief, not realizing that he had, in effect, already broken the law. The detective continued, “So why were you out driving tonight?”

“Brian and I have been boyfriends for a few months. My parents know about us and are OK with it, but Brian’s parents didn’t have a clue until New Year’s, when they discovered that we had gone to a GSA dance. They grounded Brian and tried to keep us apart, but we couldn’t stand it. We love each other. So we arranged to go out on a pair of dates, each of us with girls we met through the GSA.”

“You mean your dates were lesbians?”

“Yeah, and girlfriends. We met at the mall and swapped dates, and Jackie’s parents took Brian and me back to my house. Jackie’s parents know about her and Sharon the way my parents know about me and Brian. Anyway, they were supposed to pick Brian up and take him back to the mall in time for his parents to pick up him and Sharon, but Jackie’s father had a heart attack.” Aarons eyes opened wide and he said, “Shit! He’s here. I gotta’ find out if he’s OK!”

“Don’t worry about that for now. You can check on him after we’re done here,” the detective reassured Aaron. Aaron was beginning to wonder if the younger officer would say anything at all, when Detective Bronson continued, “So I take it that when Jackie’s father had a heart attack, that left Brian without a ride to the mall?”

“Exactly. We were running out of time and there was no way we could get a cab or someone else to drive Brian to the mall without raising suspicion. We were petrified of Brian’s parents finding out, so we did the only thing I could think of. I’ll turn sixteen in a month and would have had my license then anyway. I’ve driven to the mall with my parents many times, so I saw no problem with driving Brian there tonight. Well, no problem other than not having a license. I was extra careful and drove below the speed limit - I didn’t think anything could possibly happen.”

“So what did happen?”

“A big, black SUV rammed into us. It was at the intersection of Lewis and Elm. We were driving west-bound on Lewis and the light was green.”

“I’m afraid we have a problem with that, Aaron,” the detective said, shocking Aaron to the core. “There are no witnesses who saw the actual crash, or at least who are willing to admit to it, and the only thing we have to go on is what a snow plow operator saw when he found you. All he found was your Jetta, which had crashed into a telephone pole. Your side-impact air bags didn’t deploy, so you couldn’t have been struck from the side. Frankly, it looks like you were going northbound on Elm and simply lost control of your vehicle. So tell us Aaron, what really happened?”

“I’m telling you the truth! I swear!”

“We’re not buying it, Aaron. Think about it . . . you were out joyriding in your mother’s car, distracted by your boyfriend seated next to you, and the roads were icy and covered with snow. You probably didn’t even know how fast you were going. Let me guess . . . you looked up and saw that the light was red, and panicked. You slammed on your breaks, lost control, veered off the side of the road and slammed into a telephone pole. Isn’t that what happened?”

“NO! I already told you what happened!” Aaron was in hysterics. “I told you the truth. I don’t lie! I would never lie.”

“But you lied to Brian’s parents. Isn’t that right?”

“But we had to lie to Brian’s parents. You see, they don’t think he’s gay. Now they’ll probably try to ship him off to some reorientation camp.”

“Well maybe that would be for the best.”


“I’m just saying that if you weren’t trying to get into each other’s pants, this accident would have never happened, and your Brian would have been OK.”

“NO!” Aaron burst into tears. The guilt was overwhelming. The detective tried placing a hand on the boy’s shoulder, but Aaron just shrugged if off. He was inconsolable and didn’t even hear the knock on the door.

“What the hell’s going on here?!” Bill Epstein asked.

“We’re simply trying to find out what happened to cause the accident. Are you the boy’s father?”

“No, I’m his attorney.”

“What?” Aaron asked.

Mr. Epstein walked over to Aaron and sat down next to him on the love seat. “Aaron, I was home when the hospital called Larry to tell him you were here. He filled me in on everything.” Aaron’s eyes opened wide in sudden realization. “I’m not going to discuss it with you with the police right here, but I think you need a lawyer. You also need a responsible adult to ‘claim’ you since your parents aren’t here. I’d like to fill both of those roles if you’ll let me.”

“Mr. Epstein, I can’t believe this is happening. They seem to think I caused the accident. I may have killed . . .”

“AARON, STOP!” Mr. Epstein exclaimed. “Don’t say another word with the police here!” He turned to face the detective and asked, “Did you Mirandize him?”

“No, we’re just on a fact-finding mission tonight. He’s not even a suspect, yet.” The way the detective said ‘yet’ sent a chill down both Aaron’s and Mr. Epstein’s spines.

“Aaron, don’t say another word to these men. Once again, will you let me represent you?

Aaron nodded his head.

“OK, gentlemen, we’re done here. If you’ll excuse us, I’d like to speak to my client in private.” After the officers had departed. Mr. Epstein continued, “First of all, Aaron, if I’m going to represent you, I don’t want to hear any of this Mr. Epstein crap. I appreciate your manners, but I expect all of my clients to call me by my first name, and I’m not making an exception for you. So from now on, I expect you to call me Bill. OK?”

“Sure, Mr. Epstein . . . I mean, Bill. God, it sounds so strange to call you that.”

“Well, get used to it. Second of all, Adam and Larry are waiting outside and they’re going insane wanting to know what’s going on, but we need to take care of the legal business first, so I’ll try to keep it brief. I’m sorry I couldn’t get to you before the sheriff’s office did, but no one knew where you were. It took me forever to find you, but thank God I did before you said anything else. Starting from the beginning, please tell me exactly what happened tonight, and what you told the police officers.”

Aaron took a deep breath, and then told Mr. Epstein how he and Brian had set up the ruse, why he felt he had to drive Brian to the mall, and what he had told the detective. Mr. Epstein was incredulous at how the detective had tried to corner Aaron and force him to admit to causing the accident in the absence of physical evidence.

“There’s no way they should have jumped to that conclusion, Aaron. It’s sounds like they haven’t even done a proper accident scene investigation, and I’ll make sure that one gets done. In fact, I’m going to contact a friend of mine in the city and make sure that we have a real expert do an investigation, too. With so much snow on the ground, they could have easily overlooked something.”

“There was only an inch or two on the ground when Brian and I started out.”

“There’s a good five or six inches, now, and the snow plow driver that found you probably shoved much of the evidence off to the side of the road . . . but if your car was hit by an SUV, don’t worry, we’ll find the evidence.

“It’s a shame that you told the officers as much as you did, but since they didn’t read you your rights, we can contest it if they bring anything you said up as evidence. They can always challenge that you voluntarily talked to them and waived your right to have your parents present, but they’re on shaky ground. The fact that the detective’s a homophobic prick doesn’t hurt, either; we can always use that to claim bias during the interview if we can get him to admit to his comments.”

“I still can’t believe I hurt Brian.”

“You didn’t hurt Brian! From what you told me, this wasn’t in any way, shape or form, your fault. I don’t want to hear any more of that. Now let's go find Larry and Adam, and then we’ll go back to my place.”

“No, Bill. I can’t leave Brian. I gotta’ stay here until I know he’s OK.”

“I understand that, Aaron, but there isn’t much you can do to help him here. . . . Tell you what, let’s go find Larry and Adam, and then we can check on how Brian’s doing. We’ll play it from there. How’s that sound?”


After stopping at the cashier’s office and after Mr. Epstein paid Aaron’s co-pay, which he’d later collect from Aaron’s parents, they found Adam and Larry sitting in the Emergency waiting room. As soon as Larry saw them approach, he practically jumped out of his chair and rushed up to Aaron, stopping just short of embracing him in a hug. Adam stood up behind them.”

“Aaron! My God, are you alright?” Larry practically shouted.

“I’m fine, Larry. I have some broken ribs and a concussion, but nothing serious. I’ll be OK, though I feel like I was run over by a truck!”

“Pretty close to the truth, I guess. You know, I could hear the sirens from my house. I had no idea it was you and Brian, though.” He said as he looked down. “Brian told me about your plans, and it all seemed so perfect. but what were you doing out driving with Brian? I thought that Jackie’s parents were gonna to take Brian back to the mall.”

“Jackie’s father had a heart attack. In fact, he’s probably here right now. Oh man, I feel so stupid. How could I have been so stupid?!”

“You know that if he hadn’t had a heart attack, it would have been him that was driving and it could have just as easily been him sitting here right now instead of you, so don’t go blaming yourself.”

OH MY GOD! How’s Brian?!!”

“Still in surgery. His parents are already here. I saw them and they asked why Brian wasn’t with Sharon. I didn’t tell them anything.”

“You didn’t need to, Larry. They’re not dumb.”

“I know. His dad’s blaming me, too, and he told me to stay away from his son and that I’m not welcome in their house ever again.”

“Ouch! I’m sorry about that, Larry. I can only imagine how he feels about me. He probably thinks I seduced Brian and turned him into a fag. But I can’t leave, Larry. I love Brian. I’m not leaving this place until he’s out of surgery and doing OK.”

“I’m not leaving Brian, either. I love him, too,” Larry grinned, “not the same way you do, but he’s my best friend ever.”

Mr. Epstein interjected, “Aaron, do you know what they did with your clothes?”

Aaron blushed and said, “I guess they ripped up my clothes to take them off. I have no clothes here.”

“I’ll tell you what.” Larry said as he took off his coat. “Put on my coat and we’ll sit in the emergency waiting until Brian gets out of surgery and then we can go to your house and get you some clothes. We’ll play it by ear after that.”

“Sounds like a plan.”

Aaron turned to his brother and asked him, “Why so silent?”

“How do you think I feel? I nearly lost my brother, and one of my best friends is fighting for his life? I knew about your plans, Aaron, and I did nothing. I knew better, but I knew how much you loved him and how much you wanted to be with him. I should have told you your plan was wrong.”

“It wasn’t wrong, Adam. If it hadn’t been for Mr. Washington’s heart attack, we’d have gotten away with it. I know it was wrong to lie to Brian’s parents and it was because of our attempt to keep from getting caught that the accident happened. If anything happens to Brian, I’m going to feel guilty for the rest of my life. In only one more month I’d have had my license. Nothing would have changed. The fact is, that it was that idiot in an SUV who did this to us. If we hadn’t been there, he could have just as easily hit somebody else. It might have been a van full of kids, for all we know. I made a stupid mistake, we all did, but what happened, happened. Right now Brian needs us more than ever.”

Adam thought about it for a minute. “I’m sorry, bro. I shouldn’t be feeling sorry for myself. My God . . . I can’t believe you came out of it without a scratch. I should be grateful. . . . we all should be grateful that you’re OK.”

“Adam, I’d give anything and everything to trade places with Brian right now. I don’t know how to explain it, but I care more about his life than about mine. Nothing else matters now. God, I hope he’s OK!” The two brothers embraced as the dam burst and Aaron sobbed uncontrollably. They stood there silently, Aaron with tears streaming down his face and Adam holding and comforting his older brother.

Mr. Epstein said, “I’m going to go check to see if there’s any news about Brian yet. And while I’m at it, I’ll check on Jackie’s dad, too. I’ll be back in a few.”

It was more like fifteen minutes before he returned. “Well, he’s out of surgery, but his parents won’t tell me anything more. I pleaded with them, but they told me it was none of my business and to leave them alone. I’m afraid they’ve cut us off from him.

“At least there’s good news about Jackie’s dad. They’ve just released him. It turns out it wasn’t even a heart attack . . . just bad acid reflux.”

“Thank God. . . . Shit, I wonder what happened to Sharon,” Aaron added as an afterthought. “Last I heard, she was taking the bus over to the mall where she was to meet up with Brian and his parents.”

“Damn, I bet her parents must be giving her the third degree right now.” Larry interjected.

“Fuck, I managed to out her, too, didn’t I?”

“Not necessarily, but there isn’t a lot we can do about it now, anyway.” Mr. Epstein turned to his son and asked, “Larry, is there anyone you know that Brian’s parents would trust, someone they know who would be willing to keep us informed?”

Larry thought for a minute. “Aaron, didn’t you say that one of your teachers is a faculty advisor in the GSA?”

“Yeah, my history teacher, Mr. Sampson. But Brian’s parents wouldn’t know him.”

“No, but I bet he knows some of Brian’s teachers. I mean, it’s worth a shot. He may have some advice on how to deal with this, too.”

“That sounds like an excellent idea. . . .” Mr. Epstein said to no one in particular, thinking aloud. “Aaron, do you have an e-mail address for Mr. Sampson?”

“Yeah, he gave it to all of us at the beginning of the year.”

“Tell you what, boys, lets go home. There’s nothing we can do here anyway. We can try sending Mr. Sampson an e-mail. I imagine he should be up by now.”


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Sorry this was such a long and unhappy chapter. but it helps to set the stage for the rest of the story. BTW, I was in a similar accident, which gave me the idea for using it in the story. In my case it was a driver under the influence of her cell phone, and not a hit and run. My Jetta was totaled, but I walked away without a scratch and nothing more than a mild concussion.

I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

12. Salvage

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 12 - Salvage

After spending the entire night and much of the morning at the hospital, Aaron, Adam, Larry and Larry’s father, Bill, headed home to the Epstein residence, where they wasted no time in sending an e-mail to Randall Sampson, Aaron’s history teacher and one of the faculty advisors for the school’s GSA. Mr. Sampson surprised everyone when he showed up scarcely twenty minutes later.

“Hi, Aaron. How are you doing?”

“I’m OK, Mr. Sampson. I have some broken ribs and a mild concussion, but compared to Brian, I came out of it without a scratch. It’s Brian I’m worried about. He just got out of surgery and his parents won’t tell us how he’s doing or even let us near him.”

Aaron told his teacher the whole story - how Brian’s parents thought homosexuality was a sin against God, how they found out about Aaron being gay and how he and Brian had fabricated a ruse to spend some time together.

“Well, I can understand how his parents feel, Aaron. As screwed up as it may be, they probably blame you for the whole thing, including Brian’s being gay.”

“Yeah, Mr. Sampson, I already figured that.”

“I don’t need to tell you that you really did something stupid, and they’re not likely to forgive you for your deception for a long time, but what they’re doing is just plain wrong. Perhaps I could try talking to them . . . get them to cut you boys some slack.”

“Actually, we thought that it would be better if it came from one of Brian’s teachers,” Larry said.

“Do you know the names of some of Brian’s teachers?” Mr. Sampson asked.

Since Larry and Brian were in the same grade together, they shared a few classes and he knew most of the others that Brian had, so he told Mr. Sampson those he knew about.

“Barbara Watson would be perfect!” Mr. Sampson, exclaimed. “She and my wife are good friends.”

“You mean you’re not gay?” Aaron asked.

Mr. Sampson chuckled and said, “No Aaron, I’m not, nor are most of the faculty advisors. It is, after all, a gay-straight alliance.

“Listen, I’ve seen what happens to gay teens. It’s bad enough being in high school, but the added stress of being gay and having to deal with peer pressure and ridicule is sometimes too much. A few years ago, one of my students committed suicide. I didn’t even suspect he was gay at the time. Actually, I never really thought about any of my students’ sexual orientations. When the story came out afterwards, I decided I needed to do something. Life isn’t fair for you guys. You didn’t choose to be gay . . . almost no one would . . . but you have as much right as any of us to live your lives, to fall in love and, yes, to marry. I feel very strongly about that and can’t fathom why most people have a problem with it. No one should have to choose between hiding in the closet and taking their own life.

“Well, that’s probably more than you wanted to know. In any case, let me call Mrs. Watson. Knowing her, I’m sure she’ll be willing to help.”

“One more thing . . . we’re concerned about what might have happened to Sharon when she showed up at the mall without Brian. We may have outed her, too. Could you check up on her?” Aaron asked.

“That can obviously wait until later, but I’ll see what I can find out. And thanks for contacting me! This is exactly what I’m here for. I’m glad you guys thought to contact me at your time of crisis.” Mr. Sampson took out a card and gave it to Aaron. “This card has my home and cell phone numbers on it. Feel free to call me any time, day or night.”

Just as Mr. Sampson was leaving, Mr. Epstein entered the room and approached the boys. “I just got off the phone with a Harvey Lasserman, a friend of mine who’s an accident scene investigator with the city. He’s gonna meet me at Lewis and Elm in a little while. I’ll tell you what,” he said as he faced Aaron. “Why don’t I drop you and Adam off at your house so you can get washed up and get some clothes. Your parents should be there later this afternoon and I know they’ll want to see you right away. In the meantime, I’ll meet Harvey and we’ll see what we can find.”

He turned to Adam and continued, “Adam, I need you to help your brother. He has a concussion and needs to rest more than anything else right now.” Turning back to Aaron, he said, “Aaron, I know you want to get back to the hospital to see Brian, but his parents aren’t going to let you near him just yet, and we probably don’t want to push it. I heard a bit of what Mr. Sampson said and let’s let him and Brian’s teacher implement their plan. Now I want you to rest . . . you’re going to need your strength to help Brian in the days ahead.”

Turning back to Adam, he said, “Adam, if you notice anything strange about Aaron’s behavior, or if he seems confused or if anything seems amiss, call me.” He took out his business card and gave it to Adam. “This card has my cell phone number on it. Call me if there is anything strange at all going on. OK?”

Adam nodded his head, and then he got a wicked grin on his face as he asked in a perfect deadpan, “But Aaron always acts strange. How will I know the difference?”

“Jerk!” Aaron said with a laugh as he punched his brother in the arm.

“Brothers!” Bill Epstein chuckled as he dropped Aaron and Adam off at their home.




The first thing Brian was aware of was a gurgling sound. He heard a gurgling sound and felt his chest expand each time the gurgling began. He felt his chest expand, but it felt like he couldn’t breathe. He tried, but he couldn’t do it. And there was pain. It felt like his legs were on fire! He tried to move them, but he couldn’t. He opened his eyes, but the room was dark with an eerie glow. Then he noticed a young woman standing next to him and looking up at something, writing something down on a clipboard. She put the clipboard down and looked at him and said, “Oh, you’re awake.”

She leaned over him and looked directly at his face, and she took her hand and rubbed it on his shoulder. “Hi, my name’s Nancy, and I’m your nurse for tonight. Don’t try to talk, there’s a tube in your throat and a machine is breathing for you. You can answer my questions by nodding or shaking your head. Do you know where you are?”

Brian shook his head.

“You’re in the hospital, in intensive care. You were in an accident. Do you remember the accident?”

Brian thought for a minute and a flood of emotions came rushing to him. He started flailing his arms wildly. He had to find Aaron!

“Don’t do that Brian. You could really hurt yourself.” But he only became more agitated. “Are you worried about your friend?”

Brian nodded his head and she noticed that he was starting to cry.

“Your friend is fine. He’s already been discharged. Perhaps he can visit you later today.” She knew very well what his parents thought, but she hoped that they would reconsider tomorrow and, besides, she had to give Brian some hope, particularly knowing what lay ahead of him. He settled down and she continued, “Brian, you’re seriously injured and you had some surgery last night. The doctors had to remove your spleen and they put a chest tube in because your left lung had collapsed.” Brian had no idea what a chest tube was, but he didn’t care. Aaron was alright and that was all that mattered. “I’m going to get your parents, they’ve been waiting all night to see you. After they’re gone, I’ll get a doctor to come talk to you.”

His mom and dad entered the room and came to stand on either side of his bed. “Hi darling,” his mother began. “We were so worried about you, but the doctors say you’re going to be fine. And when you’re out of here, we’ll get you some help. Everything’s going to be fine.”

“And we’ll make sure that Aaron pays for what he did to you,” his father added.

With that something snapped inside Brian. He tried to raise up off the bed, but couldn’t, and started flailing his arms wildly, swinging at his father and setting off all the alarms on his bedside monitor. Nancy reentered the room and asked his parents to leave. She checked the monitors and rubbed Brian’s shoulder, trying to settle him down. He slowly started to relax.

“Brian, I think I know what this is about. I’ve heard your father talking. Now they are your parents and they really do love you, and they’re doing what they think is best, but you are the patient. You don’t have to see them if you don’t want to. There are some other things you can do, but now is not the time. You’re in no shape to take care of yourself and you do need your parents help for now, especially with what lies ahead.” After a pause, she said, “I’m going to get one of the residents on call to come and talk to you now. She can fill you in on what’s going on, at least until morning rounds, when you’ll have a chance to talk to the attending doctor.”

Brian was just drifting back off to sleep when he heard someone say, “Hello.” He looked up and saw a petite young woman wearing a white coat. “I’m Dr. Loughton. I’m a second year surgical resident, and I have the pleasure of being on the critical care service this month. I was the on-call resident when you came in last night. Nancy just told me you’re awake and I thought I’d just drop by and chat with you for a while. At least until someone crashes or something.” Brian would have smiled if he didn’t have a tube shoved down his throat. She seemed a little quirky, but he kind of liked her mannerisms. She continued, “Brian . . . is that what you’d like me to call you?”

He nodded his head.

“Good. Well, I guess you remember that you were in a car crash from what Nancy told me, and you were injured pretty badly. You had a lot of internal bleeding in your belly and we had to take you to surgery to find out where it was coming from. It turned out you had ruptured your spleen, so we had to take it out. Now you don’t really need a spleen, so that’s not such a big deal, but you did lose more than half the blood in your body, so we had to transfuse you with five units of blood. The first two were not matched and were type ‘O negative’, which is the universal type. You didn’t have any reactions or anything, so I guess that was OK, even though it wasn’t B positive, which is your blood type.

“Now in addition to losing your spleen, your left lung collapsed and the space around it had filled with air. We put in a chest tube for that. That’s the big fat tube that’s sticking out of your side and going between your ribs, into the space around your lung. It’s connected to suction, so that the lung is kept inflated. Once the lung heals up and stops leaking air, we’ll be able to remove the chest tube and you should be fine. Also, we have you on a breathing machine, or respirator, but I guess you already know that. Starting tomorrow we’ll try to wean you off of the respirator and that tube in your throat could be gone as soon as tomorrow night if you do well.

“Finally, you had a fracture of the T6 vertebra. In other words, you broke your back, right between the shoulder blades.”

The weight of what she had just said came crashing down on Brian like a ton of bricks. He knew what that meant and he thought he knew what she was about to say.

“Brian,” she said as she took hold of his hand, “you have a spinal cord injury. Do you know what that means?”

He nodded as images of Christopher Reeves flashed through his head.

“I’m going to need to examine you now to get a better idea of how much nerve function you have left. I just want to caution you that what we see now may not be what you’ll see in the end. These injuries are always worse in the beginning and a lot of people regain some function down the road. It just takes time . . . sometimes months or even years.”

Brian started to cry silently.

“I’m going to poke you with a safety pin in a minute. What I want you to do, Brian, is to tell me when you first feel me poking you. OK?”

Brian nodded. He saw her move down to his legs, but he didn’t feel anything at all as she poked around. Finally, he felt her poking him just below his left nipple and he nodded to her. He then felt her poking just below his right nipple and he nodded again.

“Good, Brian. I’m now going to check your strength. Could you squeeze my fingers? OK, good, now a little arm wrestling. Pull me toward you. Now push me away. Very good,” she said as he complied. “I’m now going to do a rectal exam. Please nod your head if you feel anything at all.” Brian knew she was down there and surprisingly, he wasn’t embarrassed. She came back to the head of the bed and asked, “Did you feel anything?”

Brian shook his head, no.

“OK, Brian. I’ve got all the information I need for now. I know that this is overwhelming, but just hang in there. We’ll take this one step at a time. All you have to do is focus on getting well. I’ll be back with the rest of the team shortly for morning rounds. In the meantime, try to get some sleep.”

After she left, Brian just lay there, staring up at the ceiling. He really didn’t think he could sleep - there was just so much going through his head. First there was the run-in with his parents. And then he heard he had a spinal cord injury. He knew what that meant. Although Dr. Loughton hadn’t told him, the fact that he felt nothing, he instinctively knew, wasn’t a good sign. He pictured himself in a wheelchair and imagined that he would be in one for the rest of his life. He probably would never walk again. Worse still, he knew she had examined his dick, but he didn’t feel anything at all.

Somehow he knew that he would never be able to have sex again. Why would Aaron even want to be around him? Now it didn’t matter that he was gay. His sexual life was over. His father had won, and he started to cry again.

The next thing he knew he was opening his eyes to bright lights and there were several people around his bed. He must have dozed off after all. He heard Dr. Loughton start to speak to the rest of the group, almost as if he weren’t even in the room.

“The patient is a fourteen-year-old male who was involved in an MVA yesterday in which he was a restrained passenger in a vehicle that hit a telephone pole. He sustained a laceration of the spleen and loss of 6 units of blood, treated with an exploratory lap, spelenectomy and transfusion. He also had a collapsed lung, treated with a chest tube and mechanical ventilation. He likely has pulmonary contusions, but we will attempt vent weaning today.

“The major injury is a T6 burst fracture, resulting in a T6, ASIA A complete spinal cord injury. He has no touch or pinprick below the 6th intercostals bilaterally, and there is no voluntary contraction below this level. Strength in the uppers is fully five out of five throughout, and UE sensation is intact. There is no sacral sensation. Reflexes are brisk in the lowers, he has up-going toes and his bulbocavernosis reflex is already present.”

“And what is the significance of that?” Brian heard a man ask.

“Well, it means he’s already out of spinal shock so, prognostically, that’s one less reason to not see function.”

“True, but I’ve never put much faith in that anyway. Go on.”

“The family history is significant for diabetes in an aunt and his father has hypertension. His grandmother died of a stroke. He is an only child and lives with his parents in a one story house with two steps at the entrance. He is a freshman in high school and, according to his parents, doing very well academically. According to his parents, he has never smoked, does not drink and has never used recreational drugs to their knowledge. He enjoys music and is in his school’s band. Of significance is that he is gay and his parents did not know until last night.”

Brian’s heart felt like it would stop when he heard his life’s history being laid bare in front of all these strangers, but there was absolutely nothing he could do about it.

“His boyfriend was driving at the time of the MVA and fortunately was not seriously injured. However, the parents are blaming the boyfriend for the accident and for the patient’s sexual orientation. They seem to be a couple of ‘born agains’ who think they can make their son be straight, and they’ve forbidden the boyfriend or any of the patient’s friends to visit him. I see this as a significantly huge negative factor that could impact his recovery and his rehabilitation.”

“Mary, you really need to be careful using terms like, ‘born again’. I know many of us have significant problems with people’s attitudes, but whether we agree or not, there are a lot of people out there who think homosexuality is against God’s will. You’re talking about the boy’s parents and they do have the ultimate say on his healthcare so long as they don’t jeopardize his health. Now if you witness any signs of abuse, either physical or psychological, that’s another story. But you need to ask yourself if the patient’s interests would be better served by his parents or by Child Protective Services. Until and unless we feel there is abuse, we need to work with his parents.”

“I’m sorry, Dr. Farrell. In any case, Neurosurgery saw the patient in the ED and they will be by later today. He is already white-sheeted for the OR on Monday for an anterior-posterior fixation with iliac bone graft.”

With that, the entire group of people - doctors, nurses, residents and medical students, Brian surmised, walked out of his room. They didn’t even bother to talk to him. He understood that he was going to have more surgery, but no one bothered to tell him what it was for or why, and he was scared. All he could do was to stare at the ceiling.

After a short while, Nancy came in to tell him that it was the end of her shift. She introduced the day shift nurse, who’s name was Ken. It didn’t take Brian long to decide that Ken was a real hottie. He had short, sandy hair and grey-blue eyes. The skin on his face was absolutely smooth except for a little tuft of hair, just under his lower lip. And he had a diamond stud in his left ear. Yeah, Ken could really break a girl’s, or a guy’s heart. Suddenly, Ken noticed that Brian was staring at him and he winked back at Brian. It was then that Brian decided that there actually were some advantages to people knowing he was gay.

One of the first things that Ken did after taking Brian’s vital signs and familiarizing himself with Brian’s history was to give Brian a sponge bath. For some reason, although Brian couldn’t feel anything, he felt strangely aroused at the thought of Ken’s hands roaming all over his body and washing his most private parts. And when Ken washed his nipples, it was extremely erotic - perhaps even more than before - and for some strange reason it was incredibly erotic when Ken washed the lowest area where he had feeling, although a bit painful. Here he was, lying helplessly in bed, getting incredibly aroused by a male nurse washing him even though he couldn’t get an erection. This was just too weird.

Perhaps there was hope for his sex life after all, but then he remembered Aaron and realized that Aaron would never be satisfied with a ‘crippled’ boyfriend. With that thought, his mood sunk to a new low.

After Ken was done washing Brian and drying him off, he told him, “I’m going to change the settings on your ventilator. The doctors have ordered it. This is going to feel a little weird at first, but you’re going to be able to breathe on your own a bit. Instead of the ventilator giving you a breath so many times a minute, it will wait - to a point - until you take a breath. When you do, it will assist you, making it easier to take in a deep breath. The more you breathe on your own, the less the ventilator will assist you. If you do well, we may even be able to take you off of it altogether later today. Are you ready for me to make the switch?

Brian nodded his head, yes.

“Good, let’s get started.”

Ken was right, it did feel weird. When the switch was made Brian just lay there, expecting the machine to breathe for him, but nothing happened. Eventually his brain took over and made him gasp, which set things in motion with the machine giving him a deeper breath than he could have on his own. Within a minute, he was already comfortable with the new settings.

Ken leaned down next to Brian and whispered, “I know you’re not on particularly good terms with your parents right now, but they’d really like to see you. I think they learned the hard way that you didn’t want to hear what they had to say last night, so they’ll probably be on better behavior. I’ll let you give the word on when you’re ready to see them, if you want to see them. Do you feel like seeing them now?

Brian shook his head vigorously.

“OK, well you think about it and I’ll ask you again a little later. Oh, by the way, your parents brought in your iPod and external speakers. I’ve looked at your play lists and for a little guy, you have very eclectic tastes. You have some classical stuff, classical jazz, modern jazz, new age, rock and some alternative stuff. Pretty grown up tastes if you ask me. Anyway, would you like to listen to something now?”

Brian nodded. Ken handed the iPod to Brian and let him select a play list, and he put the iPod into its cradle and the room was soon bathed in the sounds of Coldplay. Somehow this suited Brian very well right now - a little edgy, but mellow. The first song was ‘Don’t Panic’, which he really needed to hear. Although he didn’t feel like it, somehow he knew it was a indeed a beautiful world and he briefly had the hope that maybe he’d find his way back to it.

The next thing he knew, the music was no longer playing and the sun was streaming through the window. He had no idea how long he’d been asleep, but something was casting a shadow across his bed. He looked up and saw his math teacher, Mrs. Watson, standing by his bedside.

“Hi Brian. I know you’re wondering how I knew you’re here and why I came to see you. I told your parents that I heard about the accident and wanted to come see how you’re doing. The reality is that Mr. Sampson called me a little while ago. You may recall that Mr. Sampson is one of the faculty advisors for the GSA, and he also happens to be Aaron’s history teacher. In other words, I’m here to serve as a liaison between you and Aaron. But for this to work, you absolutely have to keep quiet on this. Do you understand?”

Brian nodded.

“Good. Well the first thing I want to tell you is that Aaron is fine. He has a few broken ribs and a mild concussion, but he came through without any serious injuries. He’s very, very worried about you, however, and I can tell that he feels guilty, even though the accident wasn’t his fault. Now as to why you were on the road last night is another story. I imagine you’re all going to be getting hell from your parents once things settle down.”

Brian knew she was right. His parents were furious at him for being gay and even more furious at Aaron for ‘making him that way,’ but sooner or later it would all come down to his having violated their trust. They would never treat him the same again.

“One thing you can do that would really help me, Brian, is to give me a message to give to Aaron to help ease his guilt. I know you can’t talk, but perhaps you can let me know if this message sounds right to you. What I think you’d like to tell him is that you don’t blame him at all for what happened, that you miss him and wish you could be with him and that you love him very, very much. How’s that sound to you? Should I give him that message from you?”

Brian nodded yes vigorously.

“And by the way, he told me to be sure to tell you that he loves you and that he wishes he could be here with you more than anything else in the world. He also told me that he would give anything to trade places with you right now.”

A tear started to roll down Brian’s cheek.

“He also asked me to kiss you for him on the lips, but not only would that be impossible, thanks to that tube down your throat, but it would be a bit inappropriate for your teacher to kiss you, and I told Aaron that.”

If Brian could have smiled, he would have.

“I’m going to go, now, Brian. I’m going back to Aaron and Larry to give them an update on how you’re doing. OK?”

Brian nodded and, as she left, he thought, almost felt, that it was indeed a beautiful world.


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

13. Waiting

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 13 - Waiting

After making a quick stop at a local diner, where he grabbed a bite to eat, Bill Epsten headed to the intersection of Lewis and Elm, where the accident had occured. Harvey Lasserman, the private accident scene investigater, was already at the scene, taking photographs, when he got there.

“Harvey, you old goat. How are you doing?”

“Life’s a bitch, Bill, but then you already know that.”

“Anything interesting so far?”

“Yeah, it looks like the local boys haven’t put much effort into finding out what really happened. First of all, look . . . see all the small pieces of glass sticking out of the pavement in the intersection?”


“I’ll bet you it came from the front side window of your client’s Jetta. I’m photographing the area in detail, and then I’m going to collect some samples of the debris for more detailed analysis. It’s definitely from a side window . . . that much is certain. Side windows are designed to break up into fine chunks like this, so that they don’t form shards that could otherwise kill. Unlike the plastic used in the car’s headlights, side lights and grill, the glass sank into the snow and was pushed under the snow plow blade and into the pavement. We should be able to match it to your client’s Jetta if that’s where it came from.

“The most important clues, however, will be in the snowbank on the northeast corner of the intersection.” Harvey said as he pointed in the general direction. “If there was a collision, there should be plastic shards from your client’s Jetta, as well as from the headlights of the SUV that hit it, buried in that snow bank. After I finish photographing the scene, I’ll get out my shovel and start excavating. We should then know if something other than a Volkswagen contributed to the debris, and what make it might have been.”

“How will you know if the debris came from this particular accident?” Bill asked.

“We won’t, but if we can match the shape any of the fragments to matching edges on your client’s car, we’ll know beyond a shadow of a doubt that they crashed before they hit that telephone pole.”

“That’s ingenious.”

“It’s too bad there aren’t any skid marks to match to your client’s tires, but tires don’t make skid marks on snow. C’est la vie.”

“A major part of the county’s claim that there was no collision, is that my client’s side-impact and side-curtain airbags never deployed. Any thoughts on that?”

“That one’s a no brainer. From what your client said, the SUV hit his front fender, spinning his car to the right. Side airbags deploy for translational forces, not angular ones. Indeed, the torque on the sensors from the car spinning may have actually prevented the sensors from activating with linear forces that otherwise should have been sufficient.”

“Could you put that in English?”

“The side airbags didn’t deploy because the car spun rather than slid on impact. One thought that’s sobering . . . had your client been a split second earlier, he would have been fully into the intersection when the SUV hit him. If that had happened, the passenger would have probably been OK, but the driver would have at minimum had a severe brain injury, even with the side curtain airbags deployed, and more likely would have been killed.

“After I finish photographing the scene and collecting specimens, I’ll head over to the county impound lot and see if I can get a look at your client’s car. I’ll photograph it as much as I can without drawing attention, and I’ll try to surreptitiously get samples from paint scrapings. If I can find an impact zone from the first collision, I’ll grab some paint scrapings from there. It might lead us to the make and model of the other vehicle.”

“Thanks, Harvey. This is all outstanding. I certainly owe you one.”

“Oh, don’t say that until you see my bill, Bill”

Both men broke out laughing. Mr. Epstein decided to let Harvey to his work and he headed over to the Johnson residence to see how Aaron and Adam were doing.

When he got there, he found Aaron sitting on a sofa with a woman he’d never met. After he introduced himself to Ms. Watson, she said, “Why don’t you have a seat, Mr. Epstein. I just got here myself a minute ago and I was just about to tell Aaron about my encounter with Brian.”

She made it a point to sit directly next to Aaron so she could hold his hands and look into his eyes. “Well, Brian came though his surgery just fine and although he’s still in intensive care, the worst of the danger is over. He had a ruptured spleen, which they had to remove, and he lost a lot of blood. He also suffered a collapsed left lung and they have a chest tube in him to keep it inflated, and he’s on a ventilator, but will probably be able to breathe on his own by as early as tonight.”

She then turned directly to Aaron and continued, “Aaron, Brian has a fracture of his spine. He broke a vertebra in the middle of his back. The broken vertebra is compressing his spinal cord and they’re going to have to operate on Monday to remove the compression and fuse that part of his spine. The surgery should help him some, but there’s a good chance that some of the damage will be permanent.”

What she was saying, slowly began to sink into Aaron and tears started to flow down his face.

She continued, “This has to be hard on you, Aaron. I think you know what I’m saying, and of course, there’s still hope, but Brian’s going to need you. I hope and pray that his parents get some sense, but I don’t think they’re going to be able to deal with their son being gay and being a paraplegic at the same time. Aaron, I don’t know how we’re going to do this and we may have to wait them out, but somehow we’re going to find a way to get beyond this and get you back together with Brian.”

Aaron sobbed, “Why? Why? Why him and not me? He’s so alone right now. If it had been me, I’d have had Larry and Adam, and my parents and maybe even Brian. It’s so unfair!!!

Mrs. Watson threw her arms around Aaron and allowed him to bury his face on her shoulder. She consoled Aaron and gave him the personal message she had coaxed out of Brian a short while before. She added, “He’s not alone, you know. As long as I can serve as your go-between, you’ll be with him, in spirit if not in person. Believe me, he knows you’re with him in your thoughts. He’s very lucky to have you.

“Oh, and I got an update on Sharon. Mr. Sampson spoke to her earlier this afternoon and, confronted by her parents, she came out to them last night. Apparently they’re taking it a lot better than Brian’s parents did, from what she told him.”

“That’s a relief.”

Just then, the door to the garage opened and Aaron’s parents walked in. They ran to him and hugged him, causing him to wince in pain. Over the course of the next hour, Mr. Epstein, Mrs. Watson and the boys filled them in on what had happened and what was happening with Brian. His parents felt that the boys had done a terrible thing in lying to their parents, but that was secondary. The main thing was that Aaron was OK, and that Brian wasn’t. They knew that Aaron, and to a lesser extent, Adam and Larry, were suffering more than any punishment they could ever inflict on them. Now more than anything, the boys needed their support.

“Jim, Ruth, there’s something else we need to discuss,” Mr. Epstein began. “The sheriff’s office has done a very cursory evaluation of the accident and they seem to be looking to pin the entire thing on Aaron.”

“You’re kidding me,” Jim Johnson responded.

“I wish I were. They haven’t arrested Aaron or anything like that, at least not yet, but they certainly don’t seem to be interested in doing a thorough accident scene investigation, and the detective that interviewed Aaron is a homophobic jerk.”

“They interviewed Aaron without us being there?” Ruth asked.

“It seems they talked Aaron into it. When I got there, I put a stop to it, but he’s already told them a lot . . . none of it seriously incriminating, but still worrisome. I therefore took it upon myself to represent Aaron. If you agree, I’ll continue to represent both his and your interests unless you have someone else in mind.”

“Of course, we couldn’t find a better lawyer ourselves.”

“Well, thank you. You need to know that I’ve hired a private accident scene investigator, actually he’s from the city and moonlighting on our case. He won’t come cheap and unless the county clears Aaron, his charges could end up costing you thousands of dollars.”

“What?” Aaron exclaimed.

Mr. Johnson went over to Aaron to comfort his son. “Aaron, we’re going to spend a lot more than that on your college education starting in just two-and-a-half years. Do you think we’re going to skimp on something like this? If we don’t nip this in the bud, you might never even get to college. Don’t worry, son, we believe you, and we believe in you.”

“Even after what me and Brian did?”

“You may not have exercised the best judgment, but you’re still our son and we know you wouldn’t lie about a thing like this.”

“Besides,” Mr. Epstein continued, “Aaron’s story definitely fits more with the evidence we’ve gathered so far, and more than what the sheriff’s office is proposing. I wouldn’t get too worried if I were you, but we do need to gather our own evidence since the sheriff’s office didn’t do their job. One other thing . . . we’ll probably need to send some samples of the debris found at the crash scene, and possibly some paint scrapings, to a lab for analysis, That cost will be passed on to you. I might also need to hire a private investigator to track down the other vehicle. The good news is that if we find it, we may be able to sue the driver for all he’s worth, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves here. If it’s any consolation, I won’t take even a penny of your money for my time.”

The Johnsons started to protest, but Mr. Epstein held up his hand and said, “I know you’d do the same thing for me if the situation were reversed. It would be an insult for you to try to pay me.”

Saturday rolled into Sunday and Sunday into Monday and the days seemed endless. Barbara Watson tried to get to the hospital all she could, but she couldn’t go more than once or twice a day without raising Brian’s parents’ suspicion. Monday was particularly tough because she and the boys had to go back to school. She tried to talk Aaron out of going back to school so soon - he himself had been through a life-altering event and needed time to cope, but he wouldn’t hear of it - he needed to be doing something. None of them could concentrate, however, knowing that Brian was in surgery.

Mrs. Watson rushed over to the hospital after school only to find that Brian was still in surgery. She went back later that evening and found out that the procedure had gone well, but that it lasted over eight hours. When she saw him, he was still heavily sedated in the ICU and he was back on the ventilator. All she could do was to stroke his hair and wish him well before she left to fill Aaron and the others in on Brian’s progress.

The coming days dragged on endlessly and Brian clearly was making progress. Literally, the only thing that was keeping Brian going was the daily visits from Mrs. Watson. Just knowing that Aaron cared, gave him the strength to deal with his injury. His parents had stopped talking about Aaron or his being gay and at least he was getting along with them marginally.

By Friday, however, Mrs. Watson heard something from Brian’s parents that concerned her deeply. Brian didn’t know about it yet. She knew he would be devastated even more than he was already from his forced separation from Aaron and his friends. When she got to the Johnsons, she knew she would be in for a rough time.

“Hello, Mrs. Watson, how’s Brian doing?” Aaron said.

“Getting better every day, Aaron. Still no change in his legs, but he’s getting stronger and making an excellent recovery from the surgery.” She led him to the sofa and sat down, facing him. “Aaron, I spoke with Brian’s parents today and they’ve decided to send him to Atlanta for his spinal cord injury rehab.”

Atlanta! Why? We have one of the best SCI rehab programs in the country just a little over an hour away from here. Why would they send him to Atlanta?”

“I see you’ve been checking this out on-line, too. You probably already know that Atlanta’s program is also one of the best, but I think we both have our suspicions as to the real reason for the move.”

Aaron’s heart sunk to the basement. He didn’t know what to do. Brian would be gone for months. Then, what if his parents decided to just move away? He could lose Brian forever. Aaron started to cry when his mother came in and asked what was wrong. Mrs. Watson filled her in.

“Oh Aaron. I know how this must hurt,” his mother said as she leaned over and rubbed his back. “There isn’t anything you can do, but maybe I can talk to Brian’s mom. It probably won’t change anything, but at least I can try.”

Later than night, Aaron sat alone in his room. He was on his computer and was doing what he had been doing every night for the past several days - chatting online in an SCI chat room, seeking comfort for his anguish, solace for his loneliness, but mostly - hope for Brian’s future. Most of the participants were people who themselves had a spinal cord injury, some of whom had been in a wheelchair for years and were giving advice, and others who were more recently injured and had a lot of questions to ask. There were also some friends and family members who were there to learn, as was Aaron. He hadn’t been shy and everyone already knew that he had a friend who was injured just one week ago. Everyone was very helpful and understanding, but cautious as they knew that the hardest part of Brian’s recovery was yet to come.

Aaron was amazed at the wealth of information he had already gathered. He understood how people managed their bowels and bladders and he’d even read discussions related to having sex with wives, husbands, girlfriends and boyfriends. With the latest news about Brian, however, he was particularly dejected and more determined than ever not to lose him. He therefore decided to go for broke and ask what was really on his mind.

Aaron: Is anyone in here gay?

Aaron waited for a response, but there was nothing. All chatting completely stopped and no one typed anything for what seemed like several minutes, but was probably less than a minute in reality. Finally, there was a response.

Hotwheels (admin): First of all, I want to tell everyone in here that I will not tolerate any kind of gay-bashing or derogatory commentary. I think that we all recognize that it took real balls (no pun intended) for Aaron to ask this question. Now Aaron, you need to know that people with SCI are like the rest of society and there are a lot of people here who will probably take your question the wrong way. I would guess there probably are other gay people here, but you can’t expect them to out themselves on your behalf.

Hotwheels (admin): If anyone here would like to help Aaron, I suggest you contact him in a private chat or off-line. Aaron, if anyone here harasses you, let me know and I’ll yank their privileges in this chat room. If no one responds, e-mail me and I’ll see if I can find someone who can help you.

Just then, Aaron got a request for a private chat with someone named Steve. He accepted the chat.

Steve: Hi Aaron. Yes, I’m gay. What would you like to know?

Aaron: Brian isn’t just my friend. He’s my boyfriend. I’ve heard some discussion of sex in the chat room, but all of it heterosexual. What can Brian and I expect in the sex department once he finishes rehabilitation.

Steve: Well, everyone is different and it depends a lot on Brian’s level and the completeness of his injury. What did you say his level was again?

Aaron: I believe it’s a T6 level. Something like ASIA A, but I don’t know what that means.

Steve: It means that he has no sensation or muscle function below the sixth thoracic level. Basically, he has no sensation anywhere lower than about an inch or two below his nipples. It’s a complete injury, which means he doesn’t have any feeling at all in his rectum.

Aaron: Oh.

Steve: Well, first of all, there’s a saying in SCI - the primary sexual organ is the brain. What that means is that our arousal is entirely cerebral. Right now, you get hard just by thinking about seeing cute men naked. Now although Brian can’t get hard from his thoughts any more, he still can get aroused. In time, he’ll learn to enjoy sex with you and even to have something similar to an orgasm . . . it just won’t be as intense as yours and he may not be able to ejaculate.

To Aaron, that didn’t sound so bad at all. In fact, it sounded like he’d be able to continue to have a satisfying relationship no matter what - if Brian didn’t leave. He continued the chat.

Aaron: Will I be able to do anything with his dick?

Steve: Yes and no. His dick will still function and he’ll probably have reflex erections, but he won’t feel them and he won’t be able to sustain them. Now erectile drugs do work, but Brian’s erections won’t be as hard as before. You may still be able to blow him and he may even cum, but he won’t feel it normally and it may even be extremely uncomfortable to him. Also, his erections may not be stiff enough for anal penetration. Don’t feel self-conscious and you don’t have to answer this, but have you two had anal sex?

Aaron: Only once - we did it for the first time the night he was injured. I was the bottom. I still would kind of like to, but I’m not sure it will work. Maybe with me as the top?

Steve: Aaron, it’s possible, but you have to keep in mind that it’s a bit one-sided. You can pleasure yourself with his dick and anus, but he may not enjoy it and it may even cause problems. His bladder may empty on you. His bowels may empty on you. His legs may go into spasm and he might even become dysreflexic on you.

Aaron: Dysreflexic?

Steve: That’s when your blood pressure shoots sky high from any irritation below the level of injury. Dysreflexia is a big problem for me, but my lesion’s at C7, which is a lot worse than Brian’s. When I attempt to have real sex with my partner, I get a severe pounding headache. We’ve tried medications, but they have side effects and it just isn’t worth it. But keep in mind that everyone’s different. You may not have any problems at all. And Brian has so much more than I do . . . he has his nipples! God I wish I had mine. Most importantly, we all still have mouths. You two can still kiss, he can suck you and you can both pleasure each other. In time, you’ll find a way.

Aaron: Wow! I wouldn’t want Brian to get a headache, but it sounds like there’s still a lot we can do together.

Steve: You bet there is. It’s really up to you and if you two love each other, no matter what you do, you’ll enjoy it. What you do together can be every bit as satisfying as what you could do before and as young as you are, you’ll have lots of time to explore and experiment and learn together. The future truly is up to you.

Aaron: That sounds pretty cool. I mean I’d much rather that the accident never happened, but I still love Brian very much and that’s what really matters. If we can still have some kind of sex, even if it’s just fooling around, I’ll be very happy.

Steve: Oh, I think you’ll find it’s much more than just fooling around.

Aaron: Thanks so much, Steve. You’ve given me so much to think about. Now if we can just get past Brian’s homophobic parents - that’s truly the biggest obstacle right now. His parents found out about him being gay because of the accident, and you can guess who they blame.

Steve: I hear you loud and clear. Thank God both my parents and my boyfriend’s parents are OK with us, but I think that’s only because I was a quad before we met. I think my parents are glad I have anyone at all. Maybe someday, Brian’s parents will realize just how important you are to him, too. For now, perhaps you should downplay your relationship and just try to be Brian’s friend. You know, not rub it in.

Aaron: That would be great if they’d even let me see him.

Steve: Ouch! That must hurt like hell. You know, if they’d like to talk to someone, I’d be happy to talk to them. Otherwise, there isn’t much I can do.

Aaron: I know, Steve, and I appreciate everything you have done. Thanks again.

Steve: Any time, bud.

Aaron signed off and went to bed. He knew it wouldn’t be easy, but he vowed that somehow he’d win Brian back.


Discuss the Story

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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

14. Reunion

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 14 - Reunion

The call to Brian’s mother had been terse, but at least she reluctantly agreed to meet for lunch the next day. Mrs. Sandler was already seated when Mrs. Johnson arrived at the restaurant.

“Hello, June. Have you been waiting long?”

“Hello, Ruth. No, I just got here a few minutes ago. Please, sit down.”

The two women sat quietly as the waitress took their orders.

“June, I really want to thank you for meeting with me. I know how difficult this all is and I just want you to know that our hearts go out to you and Alan, and especially to Brian.”

“I appreciate your concern, Ruth. I really do, but we shouldn’t be meeting like this. We’re probably going to be suing you, you know.”

“We’ve been expecting that. But this isn’t about money and I think you know that. We’re all much more concerned about Brian than anything else. All the money in the world won’t take away what he’s going through. And Aaron has been devastated.”

“If it weren’t for your son, my Brian would still be able to walk!”

“June, what our boys did was terrible. . . . I won’t deny that, . . . but it wasn’t just Aaron. Brian was injured because they were at the wrong place at the wrong time, and they were together because they love each other.”

June Sanders snorted and said, “Love! How can two boys love each other? It’s not natural, . . . at least not in the way I was raised. Maybe . . . I guess don’t blame Aaron for the accident, but he’s still the one who made our son this way.”

“Do you really believe that, June?”

June sat silently for a minute and finally responded, “No. I guess I don’t know what to believe. I mean, I was always taught that homosexuality was wrong and that anyone who practiced it would go to Hell.”

“He’s just a boy, June. Do you really think that a loving God can hate a child?”

“But he’s old enough to choose to do this.” She sat silently for a minute and then continued, “I don’t know if he would have chosen this if it hadn’t been for Aaron, . . . but a part of me knows that he wouldn’t choose to sin at all. He’s a good boy and I guess I’m having a hard time accepting that he’s gay. My God! . . . My son is . . . My son is . . . gay. . . . He’s our only child. . . . The thought that he could be damned forever to hell is just so horrifying, but he knows this. We raised him to be a good, God-fearing human being. No, my son wouldn’t choose to be gay. No one, not even Aaron could talk him into being gay. The only explanation is just too much to swallow right now. I guess I’ve been in denial for a long time. He didn’t choose this. I don’t know what we did to deserve this punishment. . . .”

“June, Brian’s being gay isn’t a punishment. No one knows why some people are gay. I sure don’t know why Aaron’s gay, but I love him just the same.”

“I love my Brian no less. Nothing can change that. Not even . . . not even this.”

“All we can do is to raise our children the best way we know how, June, but at some point, the rest is up to them. It’s between Brian and God now, and deep down I cannot believe that God hates gays. I know you believe that the Bible is the word of God, but it was written down and interpreted by man for thousands of years. The Bible tells us that the sun moves around the earth, and we know that’s not true. It’s written in the Bible that we can’t wear red dresses, and yet we do.

“What about the shrimp in the salad you ordered? The Bible says that fish without scales are forever unclean. Eating shrimp is an abomination. What makes it right to stop keeping Kosher, but wrong to accept homosexuality? There was so much fear in biblical times. None of us really knows how God feels about gays, but since we cannot change our sons, the best that we can do is to give them a loving, caring environment. It’s not up to us to tell them what they can do, or who they can love.”

“I wish I could believe you, Ruth. . . . Perhaps in time I will. I know you’re right about one thing, though. Brian isn’t going to change, and keeping him apart from Aaron has been the worst thing we could have done. It’s affected him horribly. If it weren’t for Mrs. Watson’s visits, I don’t know what he would have done. And, yes, I know what she’s doing. . . . I’m not blind. Some day I’ll thank her for extending my son a lifeline.”

Just then their meals arrived and they started to eat. June continued, “Ruth, I know what we’ve done is wrong, and keeping the boys apart is making things a lot worse, but we still have to deal with what they did. . . .”

“Of course we do. They violated our trust,” Ruth interrupted, “but now is not the time. And we must remember that they still love us . . . but they did what they did because they love each other.”

“Deep down, I know that, and if Brian is gay, it’s not up to me to change the way he feels. If Aaron is the one my Brian loves, then I will love Aaron no less than if he were a girl. I know it sounds strange for me to say this, but I’d rather go to Hell because I loved my son, than to go to Heaven because I hated him.

“The problem is that my husband is so headstrong. I’ve always believed in the teachings of the Church, but he sees the world in absolutes. He’s the one who wants to take Brian to Atlanta. There’s no way we could afford to stay down there for all of his rehabilitation. It would be just plain cruel to leave him down there, severing his ties from everyone he knows.” She paused for a bit, and then continued. “I can’t promise anything, but I’m going to have a talk with Alan.”

“Thank you, June. I know how hard this must be for you, but we both want the same thing for our boys. I hope that when this is all behind us, we can be friends.”

“I never thought I’d say this after the accident happened, but I think I’d like that.”

After they finished their meals, Ruth Johnson insisted on paying the check. They chatted amicably as they left the restaurant.

It was later that day, at dinnertime that Mrs. Sandler confronted her husband. “Alan, we need to talk about what’s best for our son.”

“What do you mean, June. We’re sending him to the best rehab program around.”

“But there is an equally good program right here. Why should we uproot him from his family and friends to send him clear away to Atlanta?”

“After what’s happened, do you really think he’s better off here? No, he needs a clean break with this place. He’ll get his rehab in Atlanta, away from his homo friends, and then maybe we’ll move away from here.”

“What do you mean move? I’ve got a great job, and this is our home. It’s our son’s home. I’ll tell you right now that I’m not going anywhere.”

“Don’t give me that, June. You know he’ll be better off away from that faggot who seduced him.”

“Do you really think he was seduced? What makes you think he won’t be seduced by ‘faggots’ wherever he goes?”

“He just won’t be. We won’t let him.”

Taking a deep breath and choosing her words carefully so as to appease her husband, June continued. “Alan, I don’t like the thought that our son might be gay any more than you do, but we have to face reality. It hurts to think our son might be condemned to burn in Hell, but I’m not about to sacrifice his future on the altar of my beliefs. If we keep him from Aaron, Alan, we’re gonna lose him. Alan, Brian’s gay.”


“Yes, he is, Alan. He’s your son, and he’s gay.”

“No, I don’t believe that! I won’t let him be gay! God damn it, he doesn’t have to be! I know it!”

The vehemence of his reaction startled June, but she also sensed something else going on. Her husband was looking down at his food, staring at it but not eating it. Trained as a psychologist, the reality of what was going through his head suddenly dawned on her. She knew that some of the worst homophobes are often secretly gay themselves, and Alan’s behavior struck her as being way out of character. She wasn’t sure but, suddenly, everything seemed to fit. She was taking a big risk, but she wasn’t going to lose her son, no matter what.

“Alan, are you gay?”

His face flushed deep red for just a second, and then he looked up at his wife and seethed with anger. “Are you crazy? Me, gay? Are you out of your fucking mind? Don’t you know me better than that? Have I ever been unfaithful? I’m a God-fearing Christian. I could never be gay! Homosexuality is wrong. It’s a sin against God!

June wasn’t sure if her husband’s flushing was from anger, or from perhaps her hitting too close to home. She’d never seen him behave this way before, however, no matter how angry he’d become. She didn’t want to lose her husband, but she wasn’t about to sacrifice her son’s welfare to protect something she now was starting to suspect.

“Alan, I’m not accusing you of anything. You’ve been a wonderful husband and father. You’ve been a gentle lover and I love you deeply. I don’t care what thoughts you may have in your head when you make love to me, and if you do have homosexual tendencies, but don’t act on them, that’s a sign of strength. I can only imagine the turmoil you must feel and if it’s true, I just wish you’d talked to me about it sooner, but right now, this is our son we’re talking about. If you are gay, just because you’ve managed to ‘overcome’ it doesn’t mean that our son can, too.”

“June, if you think I’m gay, then we don’t really have anything to talk about. You and your fag son can stay here, and I’ll just leave.”

June was frantic now. Maybe she’d pushed it too far, but she wasn’t about to give up. “Alan, I love you and I don’t want you to leave, but I have to ask you one more thing.” June again took a deep breath as she composed herself. From her training, she knew that most men are physically attracted to their teenage daughters, although very few actually succumb to their temptation. Although not part of her training, she reasoned that gay fathers are probably just as attracted to their teenage sons. Asking Alan about that would be taking a monumental risk - a risk she was prepared to take in the interest of trying to preserve her family. Try as she might, she saw no other way. “Please don’t hold it against me, and please be honest with yourself as much as with me. Alan, are you physically attracted to Brian?”

The look on Alan Sanders’ face was not what she had expected. It wasn’t one of anger, but of pain. Now she knew she’d pushed too far, and she’d hit the bulls eye, but she’d done what she had to do.

“Honey, what you feel for Brian is no different than what most men feel for their daughters. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. I don’t know if it’s Satan planting these thoughts in your head, but the bottom line is that you are strong and you don’t act on your impulses. You’re a good man and you have a good heart, and I will always love you, but your son needs you now more than ever. I can’t remember the last time you told him that you love him. Right now, he needs that support. Please don’t leave. I think you know and feel how much Brian needs Aaron. He needs him very, very much.”

Alan found it difficult to speak. He just sat there in tears. “God will be my salvation,” he whispered.

June felt terrible. She’d broken her husband. Deep inside she knew this was a necessary step before the healing process could begin, if it could begin. Somehow she knew everything would be alright - she had faith that they were meant to be together - herself, her husband, and their son - their gay son.

Having a gay son and a gay husband wasn’t what she’d expected in life, but she loved them both more than life itself. Her own faith had been tested that day, and it came out stronger in the end. Gone was the belief that it was up to mankind to pass God’s judgment, and in its place was a belief in the ultimate sanctity of love and family.

The next morning at the Johnson household, Aaron awoke to, “Good morning. Rise and shine!”

“Mom, what the . . . What time is it?”

“It’s eight o’clock.”

“Eight? Why are you waking me so early on a Sunday morning?”

“We have to be somewhere at ten, and you know how long it takes you to get ready in the morning.”

“Where are we going?

“You’ll see,” she said with a grin.

What did his parents have in mind? Aaron didn’t have a clue. He showered and dressed, and for some reason he shaved, even though he didn’t really need it. Somehow he just felt that he should. His mom fixed pancakes for breakfast as she often did on Sundays, and he wolfed them down along with juice and oatmeal.

Finally, he and Adam were in the back seat of their father’s Jetta and the four of them were on their way, but to where? It didn’t take Aaron long to realize where they were going, however, and he felt his excitement mount as they got closer to the hospital. This could mean only one thing. He was going to see Brian! He just hoped that it wasn’t to say goodbye.

Aaron froze as they approached Brian’s room and he saw Brian’s parents inside. It took all his will power to walk through the door, but his desire to see Brian overtook all of his fears. Brian had been talking to his parents at the time and when he looked to see who it was that had come to visit, his face immediately brightened and he practically shouted, “AARON!”

“Hello, Aaron,” Brian’s mom said.

Brian’s father then started to speak. “Aaron, Brian, I want you to know that I still think that your relationship is wrong. I hope and pray that you’ll someday return to Christ and accept his teachings, but I also know that’s something only you can do. I can’t make you be straight. If you ever want help, I’ll be here for you. Someday perhaps I can explain more about why I know that you can be straight if you want to be, but for now the most important thing is your recovery. More than anything, I know now that what I did in keeping you apart was wrong. I’ll never condone the two of you having sex, but I’ll never keep you apart again. You have my promise on that.” He turned to look at his son and continued, “And I’ve decided not to send you away for your rehab. You’ll be doing it nearby.”

With that, Aaron ran to Mr. Sandler and threw his arms around him, wrapping him in a viselike hug. Brian’s dad clearly was not pleased, but he took it in stride.

Then Aaron turned to face his lover. God, even in a hospital gown, he was beautiful. He now had a bit more peach fuzz on his upper lip and it made him look even more sexy. Aaron tried his best to keep things low key, but when he looked at the love of his life, he couldn’t help himself. Aaron leaned forward and began passionately kissing Brian on the lips. Brian didn’t exactly smell fresh, but Aaron didn’t care in the least.

“Boys, I’m willing to let you see each other. Making out in front of us is another matter. You’re going to have to give us some time. . . .”

“Alan, maybe we should just leave the boys alone for a bit,” June Sandler said to her husband. He looked back at his wife and shrugged, and both sets of parents left the room and closed the door behind them.

Aaron and Brian resumed making out, but after a few minutes of this, they realized that there was another set of eyes looking at them and Brian broke the kiss. Aaron turned around to see another boy of perhaps 17 or 18 lying in the next bed.

Brian blushed a bit and then said, “Sorry Zach. I hope we didn’t freak you out or anything. Zach, this is Aaron, my boyfriend, and, yes, we’re gay.”

“’S OK with me. I mean, I’m not gay or anything. . . . You’ve met my girlfriend, but man, when you two were kissing, you were so hot.” Zach repositioned himself in bed and it was clear that he was trying to hide an erection. The boys chuckled at his comment.

“Brian, I’ve missed you so much.”

“Me too, Aaron.”

“Brian, I’m so, so sorry. It should have been me that was injured. It shouldn’t have been you.”

“That’s absolute bullshit, Aaron. It wasn’t your fault.”

“But I walked away with nothing more than a few broken ribs. It isn’t fair!”

“What, you would rather that both of us be in wheelchairs? It was a freakish accident, Aaron. I was just unlucky. From what I understand of it, when the truck hit us, it forced me almost into your lap and out of my shoulder restraint. When we hit the telephone pole, I slammed into the steering wheel and it snapped my spine. There was nothing you could have done.

“Aaron, they tell me there’s hope, but I know they’re only trying to make me feel better. I have a complete injury. I’ll probably never walk again.”

“That’s OK, Brian. I’ve been doing some research on the Internet and I’ve been chatting with people in an SCI chat room. There are some really promising things going on out there and there definitely is hope. Maybe not right away, but someday you really may walk again.”

Suddenly Brian got very serious as he looked at Aaron. “Aaron, I don’t expect you to wait for someday. It’s not just that I’ll be in a wheelchair. Aaron, I’m not going to be able to have sex with you. I don’t have any feeling down there. None at all. I won’t be able to satisfy you the way I did before.” Tears started to stream down Brian’s face. “ You have your own life to live. You need to find someone else. Someone whose equipment is still functional.” Brian started to sob uncontrollably.

Aaron leaned down and hugged Brian tightly, nestling his head on his shoulder. “First of all, Brian, after all we’ve been through during the past week, I’m never going to leave your side. Never, ever. Whether you like it or not, you’re stuck with me. As far as I’m concerned, it’s for better or for worse, man. Second of all, I love you, and I don’t mean ‘like you a lot’. I mean real love. You’re the first thing I think about in the morning when I wake up and the last thing I think about when I go to sleep at night. You’re always in my thoughts, my love. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy sex, but that’s just the icing on the cake.”

“I’ve watched you, Aaron. You always take the piece of cake with the most icing.”

Aaron couldn’t help but laugh. “Brian, seriously, I could live without sex, but I couldn’t live without you. I mean it. My life was meaningless before we met. I’m not letting go of you. And thirdly, we are going to have sex. Great sex!” Aaron thought he felt the temperature in the room increasing and he turned around to see that Brian’s roommate, Zach, was indeed blushing. All three boys laughed. “Brian, I told you I’ve been chatting on the Internet. I’ve met a gay quadriplegic named Steve. He’s given me some real ideas. It won’t be the same, but we’ll still have a lot of fun, and we’ll have a satisfying relationship.”

Aaron then reached down and tweaked Brian’s left nipple. Brian couldn’t believe the sensation. If anything it was even more sensitive than it was before.

“And, as Steve said, we still have our mouths.”

Aaron moved his head backwards a bit and looked directly into Brian’s beautiful eyes. He tilted his head and both boys closed their eyes and pressed their lips together, opening their mouths and sucking on each others’ tongues. The kiss went on for several minutes until Zach finally went, “Ahem.” Aaron barely broke the kiss long enough to reach back and pull the curtain separating the two beds, and then he resumed passionately kissing his boyfriend.

When they finally came up for air, Brian asked, “How can you kiss me when I have so many zits?”

Aaron pulled back a bit and looked at Brian’s face. For the first time he noticed it. There were only maybe six or seven, but he imagined how Brian must have felt since his skin was usually clear.

“Brian, don’t sweat it, man. Until you mentioned it, I didn’t notice it at all. And I’ve been reading about this. It’s from the drugs they gave you in the emergency room. It’s normal to have a few zits from that, and some people get a lot more than you have. They’ll eventually go away and, frankly, I don’t care. Would it bother you if I had zits?”

“Well, you do have a couple,” Brian teased, “but I see your point. I’d love you no matter what.”

“Me too. So . . . When do you start rehab?”

“They say I could be ready to go by Tuesday.”

“Wow, that soon?”

“Yeah, I guess I’m healing up OK.”

“That’s great, Brian. You a little nervous about rehab?”

“I guess. I mean, it’ll be different.”

“Brian, like I said, I’ve been reading up a lot about this. Up until now you’ve just been focusing on healing from the surgery. When rehab starts, you’re going to start to have to live with your injury. Damn right, it’ll be scary, but one thing you need to know is that I’ll be there every step of the way.”

“But it’s over an hour away.”

“I know, babe, but I’ll still be there, one way or the other, even if I have to catch a ride from . . . your parents,” he said with a gulp.

Brian looked at Aaron with such longing. Aaron knew exactly what Brian wanted and needed and he leaned back down and they were once again engaged in a major league kiss. After several more minutes of making out, Aaron broke the kiss and said, “You’re going to one of the best SCI rehab programs in the country. There’ll be a lot of kids like you going through the same thing at the same time, and I’ll be there with you. We’ll get through this together.”

Just then, there was a knock at the door. It swung open to reveal Detective Bronson and another sheriff’s deputy. The detective approached Aaron.

“Aaron Johnson, you are under arrest for criminal negligence in the operation of a motor vehicle, resulting in serious bodily harm.” The deputy then pulled Aaron’s hands behind his back and handcuffed him.

Aaron screamed out in pain as this put tension on his broken ribs.

The detective continued speaking to him as he was led out the door, “You have the right to remain silent. . . .”

Brian was in shock - too much shock to even cry as he watched his love being yanked out of his life once again.


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

15. Jail

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 15 - Jail

“You have the right to remain silent. If you choose to give up this right, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to have your parents present during questioning. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed . . .”

“Where are you taking my son!” Aaron’s mother shouted, interrupting the sheriff’s deputy as he led Aaron out of Brian’s hospital room.

“Ma’am, your son is under arrest. Please don’t interfere. You’ll be able to see him once he’s been processed. He’s being taken to central booking in the sheriff’s office, and then on to Juvenile Hall.”

Before the deputy could continue, Aaron shouted, “Mom, call Bill Epstein. Tell him what’s happened.”

The sheriff’s deputy rudely yanked Aaron away from his mother, causing Aaron to scream out in pain from his broken ribs. The deputy didn’t even seem to care as he resumed his speech, “If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed for you. Do you understand your rights?”

Aaron, nodded his head, but when he didn’t provide a verbal answer, the deputy poked him hard and repeated, “Do you understand your rights?”

Aaron again screamed out in pain before he responded somewhat angrily, “Yeah, I understand. I’m exercising my right to remain silent.”

“Don’t be a wise-ass, young man.” The deputy jerked Aaron and led him out of the hospital and to a waiting squad car. He was thrown against the side of the car, eliciting yet another scream, and the other deputy patted him down, forcing him to spread his legs in the process. The deputy even patted his crotch. It made Aaron sick. The back passenger door was opened and Aaron was forcefully shoved inside. The two deputies got in up front and drove speedily away. A wire cage separated Aaron from the deputies. There were no seatbelts for Aaron to use - not that he could grab one with his hands in handcuffs behind his back - and Aaron was thrown from side to side as the car turned. Aaron yelped in pain with each turn.

He pleaded, “Please slow down! I have broken ribs!”

“Maybe this’ll teach you to slow down once you’re finally allowed to drive,” one of the deputies spat back angrily, although they did seem to slow down a bit.

It took perhaps forty agonizing minutes for Aaron to reach the sheriff’s office. When they arrived, he was forcefully yanked from the squad car and led inside. He was taken to a room and the handcuffs were removed. The officer who arrested Aaron told him to strip in front of them. Aaron removed his overcoat and pulled off his shirt, handing them to the other deputy, who took them and started searching through his pockets. Aaron then removed his shoes and his pants, leaving him in nothing but his boxers and socks.

“When I said strip, I meant strip! Aaron complied, feeling incredibly embarrassed as he removed his boxers. “I need your watch, too,” the deputy demanded. Aaron complied. “Turn around, put your hands on the table and spread your legs.” Aaron had a sinking feeling as he did so. His fears were confirmed when he heard the distinct snap of someone putting on latex gloves. The next thing he knew, a finger was being rammed up his asshole with only a trace of lubricant being used. Aaron yelped at the assault. “You said you were going to remain silent, so be silent!

Aaron struggled to suppress the tears that were forming. The assault on his asshole continued for far longer than he imagined necessary to determine that he had nothing hidden up there. Finally, it was over and he was ‘asked’ to pee into a cup while the deputies watched. He was given a one-piece orange jumpsuit to put on. There was no belt and the garment hung loosely on his body. He was given a pair of canvas slippers to wear - there were no laces and he had to constantly be careful to keep from walking out of them. His hands were again handcuffed behind his back and he was led out of the room, down a long hall and into a large room with many metal desks arrayed in a rectangular grid. He was forced to sit down on a chair next to one of the desks. One of the deputies sat down and started to type Aaron’s personal information into a computer. The officer confirmed Aaron’s identity, address, and birth date.

After they were finished, the handcuffs were removed and Aaron’s fingerprints were obtained. The deputy got out a card and ink pad, and he forcefully took each of Aaron’s ten fingers and rolled them onto the pad, and then onto the card. After the task was completed, the deputy handed Aaron a paper towel - nothing more - to use to wipe off the residual ink from his fingers. The handcuffs were then reapplied, rather tightly, he thought, and he was led back down the long corridor, into another room and photographed in profile. He was then led out of the building and forced back into the squad car.

After what seemed like a five-minute drive, Aaron was taken into a nondescript modern building and led down a series of corridors, up an elevator, down another set of corridors and into an area guarded by a set of steel gates. The deputies showed some paperwork to an officer, who was seated at a desk, the officer signed a form and the deputies left. After sliding his name badge through a card reader, the first metal gate slid open and the officer led Aaron through the gate, which slowly closed behind them. The officer slid his card through another reader and the second gate opened in front of them, and then closed behind them with an ominous clank. He led Aaron down a long corridor that was lined with several jail cells with heavy metal doors with barred windows in them. Aaron couldn’t help but gawk at some of the occupants who were shouting obscenities at him. The worst of it was the catcalls - it made him feel like a piece of meat.

Aaron was led to an empty cell and the officer slid his badge through yet another card reader and then punched a code into a keypad on the device. The cell door slid open and Aaron was led inside. Aaron’s handcuffs were finally removed and he was left alone in the cell. The cell door closed with a sickening clunk. Aaron had never felt so violated in his life. He could still feel the sensation of the sheriff deputy’s finger up his ass and he was sure some of his shit was stuck to the jumpsuit he was forced to wear. He had no underwear, no socks and no watch.

The inside of his cell was spartan. Along one wall was a single bed, if it could be called that - it consisted only of a thin metal shelf that appeared to be bolted to the wall, and atop it was a very thin mattress - it couldn’t have been more than an inch thick. There were no sheets and there was no pillow - it was nothing more than a place to lie down. Aaron remembered reading somewhere that prisoners were left with nothing which they could use to commit suicide or injure a guard or fellow prisoner.

On the wall opposite the cell door was a stainless steel toilet that didn’t even have a toilet seat. It was built into the wall, and visible to all that might pass by and look through the window in the cell door. Aaron was mortified - there was absolutely no privacy. It slowly dawned on him that to piss, he would have to unzip the front of his jumpsuit to whip out his dick, and to shit, he’d have no choice but to strip in full view of the guards and his fellow prisoners. There was a stainless steel sink above the toilet, with a plastic mirror above that. On a shelf just under the mirror was a shelf with a cheap toothbrush, a small tube of toothpaste, and a bar of soap. There were also a couple of rolls of crappy toilet paper and he wondered what he would do if he ran out.

On the wall opposite the bed, was a table or desk that seemed to be welded into the wall. It almost floated over the floor, much as the bed seemed to do. A small stool in front of the desk was welded to the floor. Aaron was surprised to find that there was a small flat panel TV built into the wall above the desk secured behind some thick plexiglass. There were no sharp edges protruding and there were flat buttons underneath to control the TV. Aaron had never heard of TV being available in prison - perhaps this was something new, he reasoned, to help reduce prisoner agitation. Perhaps it was because this was a juvenile facility, he also thought.

Turning toward the door to his cell, he noticed some of the prisoners across the way. Directly across from him was an African American kid who looked to be no more than eleven. The kid shouted at Aaron, “Whatchu lookin’ at, you bitch!”

Not wanting to start something or to ignore the kid, either, Aaron replied, “Just checkin’ out the neighborhood, man.”

“Well don’t go checkin’ out me, fuckin’ faggot!”

At first, Aaron was flustered by this. How could the kid know he was gay? Did all the other prisoners know? Did the guards warn the other kids, or something? Then his sanity started to return and he realized that the kid probably said that to all the kids.

Aaron replied simply, “Not interested.”

Aaron went back to the TV and quickly identified the power button. He discovered three things: Firstly, programming was limited to the four major networks and PBS, secondly, the sound volume could only be turned up to a very quiet level, forcing him to strain to hear anything above all the shouting going on and, thirdly, some of the channels seemed to be blocked. After thinking it through for a minute, he realized that, this being Sunday, programs like Meet the Press would be on. He reasoned that prisoners weren’t allowed to watch news programs. That left him a choice of watching an evangelical preacher give his sermon, or watching a children’s program on PBS. Aaron settled for the kid’s program - he had no stomach for sermons right now. At least it was something to do. It also helped him to keep track of the time.

Before long, he heard a cart making its way down the corridor. He saw trays being slid on the floor, under the cell doors. Soon a tray was slid under his door, through a notch in the door that was apparently there for this purpose. The man delivering the tray told Aaron, “Slide your tray back through the door when you’re done.”

Aaron picked the tray off the floor and placed it on his table/desk. He hated to soil his desk with dirt from the floor, but there didn’t seem to be an alternative. He got up and washed his hands in the sink, and noticed there was nothing for him to use to dry himself off. He shook the excess water from his hands and wiped them on his jumper. He returned to the desk and lifted the lid off the tray, checking out his supposed lunch.

What he found was nothing much. There was a cheeseburger on a plain bun. The meat looked dry, and the burger was smothered with ketchup and mustard, the latter being something he really didn’t like. There were three soggy pickle slices on top. There was no lettuce and no tomato - things he considered essential to any decent burger. On the plate were also some soggy French fries that were loaded with salt. There was no ketchup. Completing the picture were some foul-smelling green beans, an empty cup that he supposed he was to use for water out of his own tap, and a Snickers candy bar. ‘How nutritious,’ he thought.

Aaron walked back over to the sink and filled his cup with water. He sat down and started to eat his lunch, such as it was. He had no idea if what he got for dinner would be even this good, and he wasn’t going to take a chance on going hungry. After finishing, he realized that he needed to piss badly. He unceremoniously unzipped his jumpsuit and stood in front of the toilet, trying to get his stream started. Ordinarily, he’d have no trouble doing this in front of a bunch of guys in a public restroom, but this was different. It took forever for Aaron to relax enough to let loose.

After a couple more hours of watching mindless television, a guard came to his cell and opened the door. He was led down the corridor, this time without handcuffs, and into a small room within the cell block. He immediately noticed his parents sitting inside along with Bill Epstein. Aaron leapt into his mothers waiting arms and hugged her tightly, and then did the same with his father. It was his mother who spoke first.

“Aaron, are you OK? Are they treating you alright?”

“Yeah, Mom. I mean, now they are. It’s pretty humiliating and there’s no privacy here, but I’m being treated OK. At least there’s some TV, not that there’s much to watch or anything, but it beats just sitting around.”

“What do you mean by ‘now they are’?”

“They threw me around a lot on the way here . . . it really killed my broken ribs . . . and then they did a strip search, and they made me pee into a cup.”

“That’s horrible,” Jim said.

Bill spoke up, “I’m sorry about what they did to you, Aaron, but there’s not much we can do about it . . . yet. Brutality charges are pretty hard to prove. If they continue to harass you, however, let me know when I see you tomorrow and I’ll see what I can do about it. Actually, this is pretty nice for a holding facility. It’s brand new and has more amenities than you’d usually see in a county lock-up. Not that it’s great either, but it’s a lot better than what the county has for adults. If we complain too loudly, you might end up being moved to someplace that’s not so nice. Now remember, Aaron, this place has ears. Anything you say could potentially get back to the guards, and from them to the sheriff’s office. Don’t say anything about the accident. In fact, try not to talk to any of the other kids here.”

“How long will I have to be here?” Aaron asked.

“I’m afraid there’s not much we can do today. They’re allowed to hold you at least 24 hours, up to 48 on a weekend, so it could be worse. I’ll try to get your detention hearing scheduled for first thing in the morning. The youth court judge is a former colleague. I know he’s fair.

“In a few minutes, the detective who interviewed you at the hospital is going to come in here with another detective you’ve never seen before. I’ll be here with you, as will your parents. My very strong recommendation to you is that you be very polite, but not answer any of their questions related to the case, no matter how trivial they may seem to be.

“Since we probably won’t be allowed to stay after the interrogation, I’m going to give you some good news now. I’ve spoken with Harvey Lasserman and his preliminary analysis is complete. There is overwhelming evidence supporting your story. He’s positively matched some of the debris found at the site to your car specifically. There is no doubt that your car collided with something before you hit the telephone pole. He’s also found debris that is not from your mother’s car, mixed in with yours, and has tentatively identified it as coming from a vehicle manufactured by Ford. On top of that, we obtained some blue paint scrapings from your car. I know you said that the SUV was black . . . and you shouldn’t change your story now . . . but a blue car will look the same as a black one in the orange light of the high pressure sodium lamps used at that intersection. The paint has been sent for analysis and if it turns out to be from a Ford vehicle, then we’ll virtually have our proof - not a good as having the vehicle itself, but nearly as good.”

“That’s great, Bill.”

“Now, we’re not going to bring any of this up just yet. We don’t want to tip our hand until we have enough proof to force the DA to drop all charges.

“There’s one other thing I need to bring up. Your drug screen turned up positive for opiates. You and I both know it’s because of the pain-killers you’re taking for your broken ribs. You had your prescription bottle on you when they arrested you, so they know this, but the positive drug screen will still go into your record. This is all routine and there’s nothing at all to worry about since you’re on prescribed medication, but don’t be alarmed if the cops or the judge bring up the positive test results.

“It’s still scary as Hell, though. . . . Speaking of which, can I get my medicine here in jail? My ribs are really starting to hurt and it’s been several hours since my last dose.”

“I’m afraid not, Aaron. If you had to be locked up long-term, it would be a different story, but pain isn’t considered a life-threatening medical condition that requires treatment. I know you’re going to be hurting, but you’ll have to do everything you can to get through it.”

“OK. . . . So what’s going to happen now?”

“First, you’ll be interviewed here and when you refuse to answer questions, you’ll be taken back to your cell for the night. Tomorrow morning, you’ll be brought before the juvenile court judge for the detention hearing in a small courtroom, right here in Juvenile Hall. The prosecutor will state the charges and the judge will ask you for your plea. You will, of course, enter a plea of ‘not guilty’ and the DA will ask the judge to set some interim arrangements. The prosecutor may try to switch this to adult court and have you tried as an adult, but it would be extremely unusual for that request to be made this early in the game, especially since you don’t have a prior history. The prosecutor could also request that you be held in custody until your adjudicatory hearing either here or in a state juvenile facility, which is more like a secure dorm at a boarding school than a true jail, but since your parents are far from derelict, and since you have no priors, you will almost certainly be released to them. There is no bail for juvenile cases.”

“God, I hope they don’t keep me locked up. Brian would die if he couldn’t see me.”

The three adults couldn’t help but marvel at how Aaron thought of Brian even before thinking of himself.

Aaron asked, “What’s an adjudicatory hearing?”’

“That’s a kind of pre-trial hearing, but it usually serves as a trial, too. It’s handled by a juvenile judge, without a jury, and the prosecutor will present evidence to support the allegations of the offense. After that, we’re allowed to provide any evidence in defense of the charges. The burden of proof will be on the prosecutor, of course, but the proceedings will be much less formal than in an adult court and the rules of evidence are much more relaxed and liberal, meaning just about everything gets into the record and the judge sorts it all out before making a decision. Now I’m hoping we can get the charges dropped and not even have to have an adjudicatory hearing, but if this does go that far, we’ll present our case and ask the judge to rule on your behalf. The purpose will be to determine if you are delinquent and what to do with you if you are. On rare occasions, there is a formal trial, but usually the judge will rule as to whether of not there is sufficient evidence and then determine your disposition, which could range anywhere from a specified number of hours of community service, to a term of at least several months in a juvenile facility.”

For a while, Aaron sat there trying to absorb everything that Mr. Epstein had said. Finally, the gravity of the situation sunk in and tears started to flow silently. His mother reached out and comforted him and it was at that moment that the detectives entered the room.

To say that the interrogation was acrimonious would be an understatement. The lead detective made multiple attempts to get Aaron to abrogate his right to remain silent, forcing Mr. Epstein to intercede.

“Alright, were done here! My client has exercised his right to remain silent and you have done everything possible to violate that right.”

“Don’t tell me how to do my job.” The detectives stormed out of the room, leaving Aaron and his parents bewildered.

“I’m afraid we can’t stay, Aaron,” Mr. Epstein told him as he drew closer to Aaron and whispered into his ear, “Don’t worry. The fact that the detectives were so abusive tells me how little of a case they have against you. I’m not saying it’s over, but I have a strong feeling that the charges will ultimately be dropped.”

Aaron said his goodbyes to Mr. Epstein and his parents, who each gave him a hug, and he was then led back to his cell. The night in lock-up was pure hell. The lights were dimmed a little, but never out and there were always kids shouting or making noises. Some kids even pretended to jerk off and then laughed hysterically when the guards tried to enforce the rules of conduct. The mattress, such as it was, was so firm that Aaron felt like he might as well have lain on the floor. Without the Vicodin, his ribs hurt like hell. He hardly slept all night and drifted off in the early morning hours, only to be woken up at seven AM when breakfast arrived.

After breakfast, Aaron’s cell was opened along with several of the other kids’ in his cell block and the group of eight boys was led to a shower facility at the end of the corridor. The facility consisted of a room with eight shower stalls arrayed four on each side, directly across from each other. Two guards were present, each one supervising four boys. Each boy was required to remove their shoes, strip out of their jumpsuit and throw the jumpsuit into a hamper. Aaron had plenty of experience with communal showers at school, but this was different. He was used to kids surreptitiously checking each other out, but here the kids were openly leering at each other. He’d never felt more self-conscious in his life.

He entered the shower stall he was directed to and turned on the water. The temperature was hotter than what he liked, but he couldn’t find any way to adjust it. There was a dispenser on the wall with a universal washing gel that served as both soap and shampoo. There was no curtain on the stall and a the guard was present outside his group of stalls throughout the shower, constantly shouting, “Come on, boys, let’s go, let’s go. Let’s move it. Let’s hustle.” Aaron quickly washed up and turned off the water, then grabbed a thin cloth towel that was given to him.

As he dried off and exited the stall, the kid next to him suddenly lunged at him and grabbed his dick. Aaron was startled and didn’t even have time to feel humiliated. Before he could comprehend what had happened, the guard had the kid face down on the ground with his hands behind his back. The other guard assisted in handcuffing the naked kid, who was then forcefully pulled up onto his feet.

“You think you’re cool? That was the stupidest thing you’ve ever done. That was sexual assault, my man, and it carries a sentence of mandatory time.” Aaron watched in disbelief as a third guard entered the shower room, grabbed the kid and led him back out into the main corridor. Aaron heard the catcalls and whistles from outside as the boy was led, naked to God knows where. The other kids in the shower room were laughing, but Aaron was again feeling violated.

“You think that’s funny? That’s shit. If any of you pull a stunt like that, you’ll be doing real time. There’ll be no monkey business. Is that clear?”

All of the boys mumbled some form of “Yes, sir,” in return.

Finally, Aaron was provided a fresh orange jumpsuit and a pair of canvas shoes. There was no deodorant and as he saw everyone else donning their clothing without using any, he did the same. He was led with the rest of the boys back to the main corridor and then back to his own cell, where he was locked inside. After waiting a couple of hours, a guard came to retrieve him and he was escorted out of the cell block and into a room, where he was given back his street clothes and told to get dressed while under constant guard.

Aaron was handcuffed and led through a series of corridors in Juvenile Hall until he reached a sort of waiting room outside the judge’s chambers. He was extremely nervous and sweating profusely by then, and he knew that the smell from under his arms couldn’t be pleasant. Already seated in the room were his parents and, much to his surprise, Adam. For a moment, the two brothers just stared at each other, overcome by emotion.

As soon as Aaron’s handcuffs were removed, Adam leapt into Aaron’s arms and held him tightly. Aaron yelped in pain, causing Adam to release him from his grasp. “Sorry about that, bro . . . I forgot about your broken ribs.”

“’S OK, man. I haven’t had any Vicodin since yesterday morning, so I’m really hurting pretty bad. Don’t worry . . . it’s not your fault.”

“I was so scared for you, bro. I didn’t know when I’d see you again. . . . and did you know that you stink?”

“It’s alright, squirt. I’m OK. I’m sorry about the smell, but they didn’t give me deodorant in jail.”

“Don’t sweat it, bro.” Adam suddenly laughed at his unintended pun. “I don’t care what you smell like. All that matters is you’re here. If I haven’t told you in a while, I love you, bro. You’re the greatest.”

A solitary tear worked its way down Aaron’s cheek as he said, “I love you too, Adam. I’m sorry I call you squirt all the time. Brian’s my boyfriend, but you’re my best friend.”

The two boys started to embrace tightly, but released each other when Aaron winced. Nevertheless, they savored their close bond. They were united by blood, but also by a love that only brothers could share - a love that was fortified by friendship.

“So what are you doing off from school?”

“Are you kidding me? Aaron, when Mom and Dad got home and told me you’d been arrested, I was devastated. I never thought they would actually take you away from us. I couldn’t sleep last night. . . .”

“Neither could I.”

“Oh man, I can’t imagine what it was like. So tell me about it already.”

Aaron opened his mouth, but nothing came out. How could he summarize the experience of the last 24 hours? How could he describe the humiliation of being strip-searched, or spending endless hours in a tiny cell with nothing to do but watch TV and listen to the constant shouting and cursing of the other boys in lock-up? Aaron was just about to speak, when the door to the courtroom opened and the four of them, along with Mr. Epstein, were led inside.

The detention hearing itself was a non-event. The judge looked harried and, after a conversation at the judge’s bench with Mr. Epstein and another lawyer, whom Aaron assumed to be the prosecutor, the judge simply ordered Aaron released to his parents’ custody after his plea had been entered. An adjudicatory hearing would be scheduled within thirty days.

After it was all over, the Johnson clan headed home and Aaron enjoyed a long, relaxing shower. Wanting to hear everything, Adam stayed with Aaron the entire time he showered, put on some deodorant and shaved. Although he didn’t want to talk about it at first, Adam managed to bring it all out of Aaron, asking for a blow-by-blow account of his time in jail. The catharsis was good for Aaron - although he didn’t want to relive the experience, he needed to share it with someone, in part relieving the burden of having lived the experience alone. It felt good to put on a fresh set of clothes.

At Ruth’s suggestion, they went out for a nice lunch at one of the more upscale restaurants in town before heading to the hospital to see Brian. Brian’s parents were already in the room when they arrived. The two sets of parents excused themselves, leaving the three boys alone to talk amongst themselves.

As soon as the parents left, Aaron leaned over and kissed his boyfriend on the lips. It wasn’t a passionate kiss and there was no tongue involved - it was just a way of reassuring each other that they were still OK.

Brian started to tear up as he looked into the beautiful, hazel eyes of his boyfriend. Aaron started crying softly, too, marveling at the beauty of his love with his vivid blue eyes and his strands of golden hair. Even unkempt and in a hospital gown, he was beautiful, and handsome.

“God, Aaron. When they took you away, I thought I might have lost you for good.”

“No one, not the police, nor the courts, nor the damn President of the United States himself could keep me away from you, babe. We’re meant to be together. It’s part of God’s plan, man. . . . You and me for eternity.”

Aaron reached down again and started to kiss his lover. The kiss deepened and soon their tongues were dancing against each other. After a couple minutes of this, Adam cleared his throat and said, “Just a reminder, there is a brother and friend in the room.”

“And a roommate,” Zach said from the next bed, “but don’t mind me. Feel free to go back to what you were doing.

“Sorry about that, Adam,” Brian said, looking up at his friend. “I didn’t mean to ignore you there.”

“Hey, no sweat, man. I know how I’d feel if Jenny were taken away like that. I can’t blame you for wanting to suck face with your boyfriend. If you want, I can leave . . .”

“Don’t even think of leaving,” Brian said firmly.

“Good, ’cause I want to stay and pester the two of you anyway. It’s more fun than waiting in the corridor or trying to raid the vending machines down the hall.”

The boys all laughed at Adam’s remarks.

“Aaron, you should tell Brian about what it was like being in jail.”

“God, it must have been horrible! I couldn’t sleep at all last night thinking about you.”

“I don’t think any of us got any sleep last night.” Adam added.

“Guys, you have no idea what it’s like in Juvenile Hall. It may be for kids, but they treat you just like a hardened criminal. Adam’s already heard most of this, but let me just say that I don’t ever want to be strip-searched again unless it’s by you, babe.” Aaron said looking straight into his lover’s eyes.

Aaron recounted everything that happened to him after he was taken away, with Adam often filling in details when Aaron seemed to leave something out. Brian cried when he heard about the horrible shower ordeal, which Aaron concluded by saying, “No one can touch my dick but you, babe. No one.”

Aaron felt drained when he was through. He ended up hugging Brian tightly, and Brian seemed to refuse to let go. Deciding to lighten the mood, Aaron asked, “So are you excited about starting rehab tomorrow?”

“Hell yeah!” I can’t wait to blow this joint. Before you know it, I’ll be racing my wheelchair all around the city.”

“That’ll be awesome, Brian,” Adam said as the seriousness of what Brian said slowly sunk in.

Aaron’s smile faltered only briefly as he said, “You’ll show ’em all, babe.”

“You guys are too fuckin’ much.” Zach said with a grin as he looked over from his bed. “Brian, I’m really going to miss you . . . and Aaron, just listening to what you’ve been through blows me away. Somehow, I know you guys are going to make it together no matter what. I think if any of that had happened to me, I’d have been a basket case.

“Guys, I hope we can stay in touch.”

“You can count on it, Zach,” Brian responded as he got out a piece of paper and wrote down his home and cell phone numbers as well as his e-mail and chat addresses. He handed the paper to Zach, who tore the paper in half and wrote down his own contact information before handing it back to Brian.

“Me, too,” Aaron said as he repeated the procedure with his own contact information.

Yup, tomorrow was going to be a big day.


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

16. Rehab

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 16 - Rehab

Although the ride to the rehab center was a lot less eventful than the one to the hospital a week and a half earlier, Brian was unconscious the first time, so this one seemed much worse to him. He went by ambulance on a stretcher for reasons that didn’t make any sense. After all, he’d been up in a chair for days already. And it seemed so weird to be lying on his back and moving at the same time. Every time the ambulance hit a bump, he winced in pain from the staples that were still in his back. The trip seemed to take forever. Finally, the ambulance arrived and he was wheeled inside the rehab center, up an elevator, down a hall, and into a room.

One big improvement - he was allowed to help scoot himself over onto his bed. He’d recently been fit with a brace - a hard plastic shell that extended around his body from just above his dick all the way up to his neck. Aaron said it made him look like a turtle and it was uncomfortable as anything, but it made it safe for him to sit up while waiting for his back to heal, and that made it worthwhile.

The stretcher was barely out of the room when a nurse descended on him and started giving him a thorough going over. No sooner had she finished, when another young woman entered the room and introduced herself as Dr. Lipton, the rehab resident who would be taking care of him. She told him he could call her Kathy. She also gave him a thorough examination and asked him a lot of questions he would have never thought of as being important - things such as the physical layout of his house, his parents’ work schedules, whether there were students in wheelchairs at his school and the like.

There was a brief pause in the conversation when she asked if he had any siblings, friends, or a girlfriend who would be helping to take care of him. He told her he had a boyfriend who most definitely would be involved, which clearly took her aback, but then she went on with the rest of her questions. He and Aaron had already decided that they would be out for his rehab - there was no use trying to hide their relationship - and Brian realized he would have to start getting used to Kathy’s reaction.

After Kathy finished her exam, she told him she would return in a short while with her attending physician. Sure enough, about fifteen minutes later, she walked back into the room with a tall, middle-aged, distinguished-looking gentleman who identified himself as Dr. Stevens. Dr. Stevens spent a few minutes confirming the information he had received from Kathy and then he talked to Brian about some of the things the rehab program would entail.

He explained that the catheter in his bladder would be removed later that afternoon and the nurses would be catheterizing him every four hours. They would ultimately teach him to do this himself. In addition, he would be taught the proper use of medications and suppositories to control his bowel movements. They would be injecting him with a blood thinner that he would need to use for the next two or three months to prevent blood clots, which Brian would also learn to give to himself.

He would be working at least three hours every day with a physical therapist and an occupational therapist, who would work on building his muscles and teaching him everything he would need to know. He would be seeing a neuropsychologist who would help him to deal with the emotional consequences of his injury. A recreational therapist would help him to explore the impact of his disability on his leisure activities and he would be getting daily schooling from a tutor. A social worker would help make arrangements for his discharge, which would probably be in about a month, after which he would enter an outpatient program for as long as a year.

“Do you understand everything I’ve told you, Brian?”

“Yes sir.”

“Do you have any questions for me?”

“Well, I know that my injury is complete, but what do you think my chances are for recovery?”

“That’s a very good question, and I wish I could give you a good answer, but my ‘crystal ball’ is very cloudy with these sorts of things. You see, the spinal cord and brain are very different from the rest of your body. They heal very, very slowly. If you get a bruise on your skin, it usually heals in a week or so. With the spinal cord, it can take months or even a year or more. And like a bruise on the skin, there’s a central area of damage surrounded by an area of swelling. As the swelling goes down, some function may start to return and that of course is what we hope for. In short, we’re going to do everything we can to promote recovery but, in the meantime, we’ll give you the skills you need to manage with things the way they are now.”

“Doc, I’ve been reading and I get the impression that my kind of injury has a bad prognosis. I want you to be honest with me. Of all the patients you’ve treated over . . . how long?”

“I’ve been doing this for just about twenty years.”

“How many patients with an injury like mine have been able to walk eventually?”

“Brian, everyone is unique and I don’t want you being discouraged by an answer that might not even apply to you. One thing you have is time - things could change significantly during the coming weeks.”

“Doc, I really need to know for my peace of mind. It’s important to me.”

“OK, then. I’m afraid that none of my patients with your type of injury has ever walked, but there’s always a first time for any type of injury, yours included.”

Brian was expecting this, but it still came as a bit of a shock. He recomposed his face and continued, “That’s OK, I was pretty much expecting that answer.”

“But you know, there’s a lot of promising research and the prospects of a cure are better than ever.”

“I hear you, doc, but I can’t wait for a cure. Even if it’s five years away, that’s still a long time for a fourteen-year-old like me, and I bet that a cure is a lot farther off. I have to get on with my life. I guess that’s why I’m here.”

“Brian, you’re obviously a very bright young man, but you have to understand something. You’ve sustained a life-altering injury. Different people have different styles of coping with something like this, but everyone goes through a grieving process. Some people become angry and take it out on me, which is OK; I’m used to it. Bright kids like you often rationalize their injury. You can postpone your grief, but you can’t sidestep it. It’s something you’re going to have to get through. I understand you have a supportive boyfriend and I want you to know that I think that’s a very good thing. Your combined strengths can help you both get through this. Your boyfriend is also welcome to attend your sessions with Dr. Katz, your neuropsychologist, if you want him to. And he’s also invited to attend your family meeting, which we’ll have in another two or three weeks.

“Do you have any more questions?”

“Is there any chance I can go home on the weekends during my stay here?”

“Yes, there is, but not overnight. The insurance companies figure that if you can stay home overnight, you don’t need to be here. Once you, your family and your boyfriend have learned to get you safely in and out of a car and in and out of your house, and when you can catheterize yourself, then you’ll be allowed to go out on the weekends on what we call a therapeutic leave. These leaves are a good chance for you to practice what you learn here, and we encourage them.”

“Thanks Dr. Stevens. I’m looking forward to getting started.”

After Dr. Stevens and Kathy left the room, the curtain was pulled back and he noticed he had a roommate - an African American boy who looked to be 16 or 17. Brian said, “Hey.”

“Hey yourself.”

“My name’s Brian. How about you?”


“Hi, Kalvin, nice to meet you. You been here long?”

“’Bout two weeks.”

“How were you injured?”

“I got shot.”

“Oh man!” Brian said. “How’d it happen?”

“Just in the wrong place at the wrong time.”

“Did they catch the guy who did this to you?”

“Nope, and they never will. Listen, man, I don’t wanna talk about it.”

Brian sensed there was something more to his roommate’s story, but he thought better about pushing it. Just then Aaron walked in and his face brightened. Aaron came to his side and gave him a quick peck on the lips.

“Hey, hot stuff. Happy Valentine’s Day.” Aaron handed Brian a card.

“Hey, Aaron. Watcha doin’ here so early? I thought you’d wait until after school.”

“This is a big day for you. I thought you might like to have a little company. I got permission from my teachers to take the afternoon off.”

“How’d you get here?”

“My dad took off early and drove me here. Your parents’ll take me home later.”

Aaron then leaned down and the two lovers engaged in a passionate kiss.

“Oh man! I gotta couple a fags in here with me,” Kalvin snarled.

Aaron turned around and looked right at Brian’s roommate and said, “Yeah, we’re gay. You gotta a problem with that?”

“Yeah, I do.”

“Kalvin, chill out,” Brian said. “I’m not gonna perv on you or anything. Aaron’s the love of my life and he’s going to be here with me to help me get through this. I’m sorry if you don’t like it, but that’s just the way it is.”

“I just don’t wanna share a room with a fag.”

“I’m sorry to hear that, Kalvin,” Brian said, “but I can’t change who I am because you don’t like gays. If you don’t like it, move.”

“Why should I move? I been in this room for two weeks. You’re the new dude. You move.”

“Nope, I’m not moving. This is your problem, not mine. If you’re not willing to move, you’ll just have to put up with seeing Aaron and me kiss now and then. Get used to it.”

Kalvin just turned his head and stared up at the ceiling. Brian and Aaron thought about how this wasn’t going to be easy, but they decided to let things slide for now and hope that Kalvin simmered down.

Before Aaron and Brian had a chance to spend much more time together, a guy in his thirties walked in and introduced himself to Brian as Jerry, his physical therapist. Aaron was asked to leave them alone and Jerry spent a solid hour with Brian, giving him a much more thorough assessment of muscle function than anything any of the doctors had done up to that point. Jerry talked to Brian about some of the things that would be happening in PT and the goals they would set for him to complete before discharge.

In the meantime, Aaron went down to the gift shop and bought Brian a little stuffed turtle. He wasn’t sure if Brian would like it, but he thought it would be something for Brian to remember him by when he wasn’t there, and a turtle seemed just so appropriate, given the brace Brian would be wearing for the next few months. When he gave it to Brian, Brian was obviously very touched. He hugged the little animal to his chest and then motioned for Aaron to lean forward and they kissed each other deeply until they were interrupted by a young woman.

This time, it was Jennifer, Brian’s occupational therapist, and Aaron was once again asked to leave. He ended up sitting in the family lounge, reading the latest issue of New Mobility, a magazine devoted to people with disabilities. He actually found some interesting articles and decided to take one of the subscription cards with him, reasoning that it might make a nice gift for Brian.

In the meantime, Jennifer gave Brian another thorough going over, this time focusing on assessing Brian’s self-care skills - how well he could use his hands, handle utensils, balance himself to try to dress and undress himself and so on. She also asked him to have his parents bring in some clothes for him to wear - hospital gowns weren’t going to do, obviously. He knew his parents would be there after dinner, so he immediately called home and left a message.

After she finished, Jennifer found Aaron in the lounge and told him he could go back to see Brian. Just as Aaron thought he might finally get some time with Brian, in walked Jerry again, this time bringing a wheelchair. Aaron started to get up and leave when Jerry stopped him.

“No, Aaron, please stay. Rehab is a family affair and you’re part of Brian’s family. As long as you’re here, we might as well start teaching you how to help Brian transfer.”

“OK, cool.”

“Brian, eventually you’ll learn how to do this yourself, but we need to teach you how to balance first. In the meantime the nurses and therapists will be transferring you in and out of your wheelchair. However, I bet you’ll have it down pat by the end of the week.” Both boys nodded their assent.

As Jerry got the wheelchair in position to transfer Brian out of bed, Aaron got his first good look at Brian’s first wheelchair.

“Gee, Brian, this wheelchair looks really cool.” It was indeed, having a dark purple frame, yellow accents, black alloy wheels and a black back and seat. Aaron had been expecting something like he was used to seeing old people in - a clunky steel monstrosity. This wheelchair was sleek.

Jerry chuckled. “I know its not motorized, so you won’t be able to go zipping down the halls, but motorized wheelchairs are for people who have limited or no upper body strength. In your case Brian, we want to you get a thorough workout. The exercise of pushing yourself around will contribute to your overall health and recovery. Now boys, the first thing you need to do when transferring is to lock the brakes on your wheelchair. When you get your chair in the right position, as close to the bed as possible and next to Brian’s rear end, lock the brakes. If you don’t, the chair will wheel away from you and Brian’s ass will wind up on the floor. We have to fill out a whole bunch of paperwork when that happens, and I don’t like paperwork.” Both boys laughed.

Jerry proceeded to show them how to remove the arm rests, how to sit Brian up at the side of the bed and give him time to acclimate to the resulting drop in blood pressure, how to position his feet, and how to balance him over his legs and slide him onto the chair’s seat without putting Aaron’s back at risk of injury, taking care to avoid scraping Brian’s ass on the wheels. Unfortunately, the first time he tried it, Aaron winced in pain from his healing, broken ribs. After a few more tries, Aaron learned how to better balance himself so that he avoided putting any strain on his back or trunk. Aaron and Brian had the technique down pat, and Jerry was more than satisfied. “You’re a fast learner. From now on, you’re cleared to transfer Brian in and out of his bed. Brian, do you feel up to staying in your wheelchair the rest of the evening?”

“Hell yeah,” Brian beamed.

“You ready to try taking it for a spin?”

“More than ready!”

Jerry then spent the next half-hour instructing Brian in how to push his wheelchair and to make turns without injuring his wrists or shoulders. Brian had the technique down in no time. When dinnertime rolled around, Aaron made a quick stop at the Wendy’s around the corner and he ate with Brian in his room.

Shortly after they finished, Brian’s parents arrived with his clothes in tow. They stayed with Brian and Aaron for a couple of hours, just talking and catching up on Brian’s day. They actually treated Aaron nicely and engaged him in the conversation, just as they would have before they knew that he was gay. At nine o’clock, visiting hours were over and they gave Aaron a lift home. It was strangely quiet in the car on the ride home, but Aaron decided that he preferred it that way rather than having to catch hell from the Sandlers about his sexual orientation.

Over the following days, Aaron got into a pattern of getting home from school, grabbing a quick bite to eat, riding with Brian’s parents to the rehab center, spending a little time with Brian and then returning home. Brian’s parents quickly learned to leave Aaron alone with Brian for the first half-hour of their visit, although their presence in the room didn’t seem to be much of a deterrent to the two boys making out anyway. The strange thing was that his parents seemed to be getting more comfortable having Aaron around - Brian knew they would never accept him as family, but maybe, just maybe, they were finally recognizing the positive aspect of Aaron’s and his relationship.

Over the first weekend, Aaron spent nearly all of both days at Brian’s side while Larry, Adam and a number of friends and acquaintances stopped by. Aaron and Brian tried to act casual around all the people who didn’t know they were gay, but Aaron noticed at least a few times, the surprise on kids faces when he and Brian, without thinking, held hands. Although they might have noticed, no one commented on it directly and Aaron could only hope they would keep it to themselves, at least until he and Brian decided to formally come out at school.

Brian did well with his new learned skills and was quickly able to catheterize his penis and to insert his own suppositories, giving him complete control over his bladder and bowels. He was soon giving himself his own heparin injections and was told that most patients didn’t do this until much later in their rehab. Brian was highly motivated and well-liked by the nursing staff and therapists. The other patients were starting to look up to him as well, and even his roommate had stopped pestering him about his sexual orientation.

Although Brian had never been muscular, he worked out in therapy as hard as anyone and although it took every ounce of effort he could muster, he actually was beginning to develop some real arm muscles. Indeed, Brian’s progress was so rapid that there was even talk of his being able to finish his rehab a week early. This came at a price, however, as Brian poured his anger and frustration into his physical rehabilitation at the expense of his emotional recovery. He skipped his sessions with the psychologist in order to spend even more time in the gym, putting on a happy face that fooled only himself. The emotional imbalance wasn’t going unnoticed.

One day while he was working out in the PT gym, one of the other patients he’d seen around, a very tall African-American kid of about the same age, wheeled up to him and asked if he could meet with him in private.

“Hi, Brian. I don’t think we’ve met before . . . my name’s Jamal.”

“Hi Jamal, it’s nice to meet you.”

“It’s nice to meet you too. Brian, can I ask you something?”

“Of course, Jamal. What gives?”

“Well, you know. I’ve heard rumors . . .”

“You mean that I’m gay?”


“Well, Jamal, yes, I’m gay. Why do you ask?”

Jamal was looking down at the floor as he said something that Brian couldn’t hear.

“What was that, Jamal?”

He spoke a little louder this time, but still was barely audible. “Well, you know, I think that maybe I’m that way too. Brian, how did you know you were gay?”

“Well Jamal, that’s a tough one. I guess I didn’t know it for sure until a few months ago, but I’d always been attracted to boys. I mean most boys play with boys when they’re young, and it’s only natural to check each other out when showering or changing clothes, but I guess I found myself being fascinated by what boys looked like. I couldn’t help but looking at other boys’ privates when changing to go swimming. Other boys took an interest too, but they also wanted to know what girls looked like, and I never really did.

“When I hit twelve, the emotions became almost unbearable. I started jacking off almost daily and my thoughts were always of boys. Still, I was in real denial. I just assumed it was a phase I was going through and that I’d eventually start liking girls. It just never happened. I was starting to wonder if I might be gay, but my parents are real religious and they taught me that homosexuality was wrong. So I just assumed that by being a good Christian boy, everything would work out, but it didn’t.

“Once I started high school, I began to suspect the truth and it was almost more than I could stand. I had to tell someone, but I was so afraid of being ostracized. Then one day, I was meeting up with friends to go to a movie. One of my friends was with his brother and, when I saw his brother looking so shy and cute, I knew immediately that I was gay. I wanted that boy and I couldn’t get him out of my head.

“Finally, I opened up to my best friend, Larry, about what I was feeling. Larry and I always told each other everything, but I was so afraid of telling him. I was head over heels, man, and I just had to tell someone. Larry was actually cool with it. He didn’t care that I was gay and he even suggested ways I could try to meet Aaron again and test the waters, so to speak. But then I got lucky and ran into him at school. We both instantly knew what we wanted and had our first kiss. It was so awesome.

“Well, Jamal, that’s probably more than you wanted to know. Kind of a long answer, huh?”

“No, Brian. That was a really nice story. It was actually pretty hot. I wish I could find someone like that, but you’ve really helped me a lot. After listening to you, I know that I’m gay. No maybe about it. I just don’t know where to begin. You see, there’s this kid at school, a white boy . . . He’s so adorable. He’s shy and pretty much a loner. He’s also small for his age, but he has the cutest smile, a mop of golden hair and the most amazing green eyes. It would be funny if we got together, you know? I’m black, he’s white . . . I’m tall, he’s short . . . but I just can’t stop thinking about him.”

“Do you think he might be gay?”

“That’s the rub. I don’t know.”

“Is he in any of your classes?”

“We’re in the same algebra class together, but we don’t sit near each other.”

“OK, here’s what I think you should do. Approach him about one of your homework assignments. Try to interest him in meeting with you to discuss the assignment, or just approach him at lunch and ask to sit with him. Engage him in normal conversation and ask him about what he likes to do, what subjects he likes, what he thinks about his teachers, if he has brothers or sisters . . . anything related to him. Focus the conversation on him and you’ll be bound to draw him out.”

“But how will I find out if he’s gay?”

“Well, I did some reading on this on the Internet when I was trying to figure out if Aaron was gay. Nothing is foolproof, but there are telltale signs. One of the easiest is to watch where his eyes wander; see if he checks out guys. An even more direct way is to ask if he has a girlfriend. Since even gay kids won’t admit they don’t have an interest in girls, the important thing is his reaction. Look right into his eyes when you ask the question. Gay boys’ pupils will dilate, they’ll break eye contact and often look down, and they’ll almost always blush. Now straight boys will do some of these things, too, especially if they’re unsure of their sexuality or just very shy. What they say doesn’t matter - it’s the reaction to the question that’s important.

“If you get a ‘gay-like’ discomfort reaction, you’ll need to push a little further. If he asks you if you have a girlfriend, be circumspect about it. Tell him that you’re not really interested in having one right now. That can be taken a number of ways. Then push him on who he thinks is hot. Throw out the names of some ‘hot babes’ and look at his eyes. The pupils will dilate if he’s aroused by any of the names you mention. If you don’t get a response, tell him you think any of those girls would be interested in someone as cute as he is. This will help set the stage by telling him you think he’s cute. If he calls you on it, tell him you think he’s a guy chicks would go for. Remember, though, that you have to remain absolutely cool when this happens. What ever you do, don’t freak.

“If you’re pretty sure he’s gay by now, it will be time to take a huge risk. Tell him something like, ‘you know, if you’re gay or anything, it’s OK’. Tell him you’re ‘cool with it’. Then if you’re really feeling good about the way things are going, tell him you think you might be gay, too. If he’s gay, he’ll probably have trouble maintaining eye contact. He may say anything, but an angry straight boy will look right at you. If that happens, just say you were kidding and laugh - ‘had you going there for a minute’.”

“But what if he isn’t gay and he decides to tell everyone I am?”

“The main thing, Jamal, is to stay cool. Let your head and not your dick do the talking. If you keep cool, you can talk your way out of anything. Don’t admit to him that you’re gay unless you think he’ll be comfortable with it.”

“Thanks, Brian. You’ve given me a lot to think about.” Then after a big sigh, Jamal asked, “. . . but how’s he gonna relate to me being in a wheelchair?”

“I don’t have a good answer for that one, Jamal. I mean, a lot of people just don’t see beyond the chair, but if your friend is willing to get to know you, it should still be OK. It may even be a way to get to know him better, since he’ll undoubtedly have a lot of questions. Once he gets to know you, the wheelchair won’t matter. By the way, there’s a lot of stuff on the Internet about sex in SCI, and my boyfriend has made contact with a gay quadriplegic who’s giving us pointers on gay sex. I can’t wait to try things out!”

“Do you have feeling down there?”

“No, I don’t. But I still love my boyfriend very much and we’ll work it out. As the gay guy said, my mouth still works and that’s all I need.”

“Thank God I can still feel my cock. It’s not quite the same, but I get erections and all.”

“Have you tried it out?”

“Can’t. I have a C7 level and don’t have much use of my hands. I’ve tried, but I just can’t get enough contact and I can’t get into a rhythm.”

Brian looked down and blushed as he said, “You know, It’s not like I’m a slut or anything, but if . . . you’d like to find out . . . and if my boyfriend wouldn’t object, maybe I could help you out.”

“What do you mean . . . What are you saying, that you’d jack me off? Oh man, that’s just too much to ask of anyone.”

“Well, I’m not making any promises. I wouldn’t even think of doing anything unless Aaron’s OK with it, and there’d be nothing sexual in it or anything. It would just be another part of your therapy. Oh, but wait a minute. . . . Do you get dysreflexic?”


“Yeah, you know, where your blood pressure shoots up and you get a pounding headache or sweaty. It happens when there’s something irritating your body below your injury level. Something like an overfull bladder, a skin sore or your bowel program . . . or with sex.”

“I get a headache if I wait too long to cath. myself so, yeah, I guess I do.”

“I think there are meds you can take. You should ask your doctor before we try anything.”

“You mean talk to him? . . . about sex?! I couldn’t do that!”

“Trust me, Jamal, I’m sure it wouldn’t be the first time a teenage boy has asked him about sex. I know that I certainly intend to talk to Dr. Stevens to find out all I can about having sex with Aaron. You know . . . what’s safe; what’s not. Think about it. Talk to him, and then we can talk some more and maybe . . .

“Hey, and if you ever want to talk to me, even after we get out of this joint, just give me a call or message me.”

They boys exchanged numbers and e-mail addresses and went their separate ways. Aaron was already waiting for Brian in his room.

“Hey there, gorgeous,” Aaron said as he leaned forward and kissed Brian on the lips.

After finally coming up for air, Brian said, “You’re not half bad looking yourself,” as he smiled broadly.

“What was the hold-up?”

“A fellow patient had some questions for me.” Brian lowered his voice. “He just came to realize he’s gay and has the hots for a boy at school, so I gave him some tips on how to find out if the other kid feels the same way.”

“That’s sweet of you, Brian.”

”There’s one other thing . . . He doesn’t have the use of his hands, but he can feel his dick. He’s not sure if his, er . . . equipment works. Would you be jealous if I maybe gave him a hand, so to speak? It’d only be a one time thing.”

Aaron laughed so hard that Brian thought he would choke. “Sorry, man. I just had this image of you going around here offering hand jobs to all the boys on the floor.”

“Aaron, I would never . . .”

“’S OK, man. Actually, it’s kinda sweet. I know you’d just be helping someone out who needed it. I appreciate that you asked. You’re a caring person and that’s one of the reasons I fell so hard for you. Now if you ever get the notion to pull on other people’s dicks around here, please let me know so I can get in on the action,” Aaron said as he winked at his sweetheart.

However, as Aaron continued looking at his lover, he couldn’t help but notice the dark circles under his eyes and the forced smile on his face. Aaron knew that all was not well, but he himself was doing all he could to hide the worry in his own eyes from the boy he loved.


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

17. Friends & Family

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 17 - Friends & Family

The rest of the week went by quickly and soon it was Saturday and time for Brian’s first therapeutic leave - a chance for him to get out of the rehab center and to try out his wheelchair skills in the real world and to visit his own home. Because his parents’ SUVs were too high off the ground to transfer into, Aaron’s dad agreed to pick him up. Brian transferred himself into the shotgun seat of their remaining Jetta and Aaron folded the wheelchair and placed it in the trunk.

As they drove home, the boys chatted excitedly about the things they would do together. They thought they might take in a movie and go out for lunch. First, however, they would go to Brian’s house. As much as they would have liked to go to Aaron’s house for a little solitary exploration, they realized it just wasn’t practical. Aaron’s house was an older colonial with a lot of steps at the entrance and no bathrooms on the first floor. Brian’s house, on the other hand, was nearly ideal. It was a bungalow with everything on one floor and only one step to get inside. A contractor was stopping by next week to build a small ramp and to start work on enlarging Brian’s bathroom to make it fully wheelchair accessible.

“Wow, Aaron. I was just thinking. In a couple of weeks, you’ll have your license and be able to drive me everywhere.”

“Sorry, bud, but you’ll probably have your license before I do.”


“Even if I’m cleared of the personal injury charge, I’m still guilty of driving without a license. I won’t be eligible now until I turn eighteen.”

“Oh man, that really sucks!” Brian started to cry softly.

“What’s wrong, baby?”

“It’s all my fault. If I hadn’t been so horny, none of this would have happened.”

“I was just a horny as you. Please don’t cry. You got the worse end of the deal by far. Waiting until I turn eighteen is a small price to pay.”

Just then Aaron’s dad spoke up. “Aaron, I’ve been speaking with Bill about it. If they find the guy who was driving the SUV, in addition to collecting on the insurance, he thinks we have a good chance of getting the license violation dropped, too.”

“Dad, thanks, but I don’t really want to drive after what happened.”

“And that’s exactly why we need to fight this. If you don’t get back to driving, you’ll never confront your demons. I don’t want you to be afraid of driving. You did something wrong, but all of us believe you when you say that you didn’t cause the accident. You’ve always been very responsible. In spite of what happened, your mother and I trust you. We know you won’t try to deceive us again. We’re here to help you, son. We want to help both of you boys in any way we can, but we need to work as a team and having your license will make a big difference in Brian’s quality of life.”

“Somehow I don’t think that Brian’s parents are going to let me drive him anytime soon, Dad. I know they’re a lot more accepting of me and Brian’s relationship now, but I doubt they’re ready to forgive me for what happened.”

Jim smiled as he said, “Brian, Ruth and I have had a long talk with your folks, and we’ve realized that with their professional commitments, they can’t give the full time and careful attention to you that Aaron can. Actually Aaron, they’ve already agreed to testify on your behalf.” Both Aaron and Brian had to pick their jaws off the floor. “I think you’ll find they’ve come a long way with this.”

They pulled up in front of the Sandler residence and both of Brian’s parents came outside. Aaron ran to the trunk to get Brian’s wheelchair for him, but found he couldn’t lift the chair out without experiencing excruciating pain from his broken ribs. His dad came to the rescue and lifted it out, so Aaron could set it up. Brian transferred himself into the wheelchair effortlessly, as if he’d been doing it all his life. Jim helped Aaron tip the wheelchair up the one step into the house. Brian wheeled himself inside and his parents each gave him a hug.

Aaron and his dad followed them inside and the five of them chatted for a while. They talked about their plans for the day and agreed that Aaron and Brian would take in a movie at the cineplex, and get lunch there as well. Then they would tool around the mall for a while and meet up with Larry, Cindy, Jackie, Sharon, Adam and Jenny.

Aaron’s dad would pick Brian and Aaron up and drop Brian off at his parents at four o’clock so he could spend some quality time alone with his folks for the rest of the afternoon. The two sets of parents and the boys would then go out for dinner at six, and then return Brian to the rehab center after that.

Putting these plans into actioin turned out to be another matter. Getting to the cineplex was easy enough, but when Brian tried to open the door on his own as he wanted to, he found it to be very heavy and it just wouldn’t budge. He kept trying when Aaron finally just reached around Brian and opened the door for him, wincing from the pain as the door tugged back on his broken ribs. Brian felt crestfallen.

“You should have let me do that, Aaron.”

“No, it’s not your fault that you couldn’t open it. I’m going to speak to the manager.”

Aaron asked to speak to the manager and they had to wait until it was nearly time for the movie to start for the manager to come out. Aaron didn’t waste any time when he finally did.

“Are you aware that your entry doors are not ADA-compliant?” The manager didn’t know what to say. Aaron continued, “The law stipulates that your doors must be able to be opened by someone in a wheelchair. My friend here wasn’t able to because it’s too heavy and needs a power assist. I hope this will be taken care of expeditiously or you’ll be hearing from the Center for Disability Rights. Do I make myself clear?”

The manager could do little else but mumble an apology and give the boys free movie passes.

“That was awesome, Aaron.”

“I’d walk on water for you, my boy.” Aaron smiled back.

Once inside the theater, they found that the accommodations for wheelchairs were far from ideal. They had a choice of either sitting way too close to the screen, or sitting in the very back of the theater. They chose the latter. After the movie, they found that the concession counters at the food court were too high for Brian to look over them, and the seating did not provide adequate space for Brian’s wheelchair.

Getting from the cineplex to the mall was also an ordeal. The trip across the parking lot was meant to be made by car rather than on foot, and definitely not by wheelchair. There was a gully separating the movie parking lot from the mall parking lot and while a person could walk across it, a wheelchair certainly could not cross. The boys were forced to detour a good half mile to get around it, leaving Brian in particular exhausted and with sore arms.

The entry to the mall had doors that were also too difficult to open and the boys, once again, had to find the mall manager to complain.

Once inside the mall, it was a lot easier to maneuver around, but the stores themselves were a nightmare when it came to browsing the aisles in a wheelchair. Racks were spaced way too close together and in random patterns that forced a lot of wheeling around.

People tended to glare at the boys when they dared to ask them to move so they could get through. Sadly, it was just more practical for Brian to stay put and let Aaron do the browsing for him.

The day was a real eye-opener for both boys and they realized that being gay was a lot less of a burden than being in a wheelchair. As the day progressed, Brian’s façade started to crumble and his mood became increasingly depressed.

Finally, it was time to meet up with their friends and they continued to cruise the mall with Larry, Cindy, Jackie, Sharon, Adam and Jenny chatting about Brian’s progress in the rehab center and about life in general. At one point, Brian informed them that it was time for him to cath himself. He excused himself and headed to the nearest men’s room. Aaron went with him in spite of his protests, just to be sure that everything was OK. It was a good thing he did as the ‘handicap’ stall wasn’t nearly big enough for him to maneuver his wheelchair, let alone lay out the equipment he needed. The sink area lacked any sort of space to put things down, so Brian really did need Aaron to hold things for him.

Lacking an adequate stall, Brian was forced to do everything out in the open for all to see. It was embarrassing to say the least. First he exposed the head of his dick and had Aaron open his cath kit. He donned surgical gloves and used an antiseptic sponge to wipe the head of his penis, taking particular care to cleanse the slit. He opened a package of sterile KY jelly and squeezed out a generous dollop into a tray that Aaron held for him. Brian opened the package containing a sterile catheter and he then lubed up the tip in the KY jelly. He pushed the tip of the catheter into his slit and advanced it up into his penis, causing Aaron to cringe at the sight. Soon a trickle of yellow urine was flowing through the clear catheter into the tray that Aaron held. When he finished, Brian withdrew the catheter, washed off the head of his dick and zipped up. Aaron dumped the urine in a nearby toilet and then threw the remnants of the cath kit away.

“I had no idea this was so involved,” Aaron remarked as he washed his hands.

“I do this four times a day, and sometimes six times if I drink a lot. At least when I go home, I won’t need to carry around these sterile cath kits. I’ll be able to use reusable catheters and boil them, but they don’t want me to do that yet.

“Aaron, could you do me a favor and not talk to the other guys about this?”

“Sure, Brian. No problem.”

They rejoined their friends and went for some ice cream before deciding that they’d had enough of doing the mall thing, especially when they all saw how difficult it was for Brian. They called Larry’s father, who picked them up a bit early.

As he was dropped off at his house, Brian said, “Hey, don’t feel sorry for me, guys. I’m having a blast! This beats a day at the rehab center anytime.” However it was evident to everyone but Brian that he was far from OK. There wasn’t even a smile on his face when he said his goodbyes.

Later that evening, Aaron and his parents went to pick up Brian and they all went to a fine restaurant nearby - one of Brian’s favorites. That’s when the ‘fun’ began. When they arrived, they found that there was a series of steps to get to the main dining area, which was where their reserved table was located. There was no accessible way to reach their table and Brian flat out refused to allow himself to be carried up there as the manager had suggested. Since it was a busy night, there was nothing available in the back dining area, which was the only part of the restaurant that was accessible, and so they had to wait nearly 45 minutes until something opened up. The manager treated them to complementary drinks while they waited, but that was small consolation. Finally, they were led through the kitchen to their table, as this was the only accessible route.

When the waiter took their orders, he spoke down to Brian and very loudly and slowly. Finally, Brian couldn’t stand it any longer. He practically shouted at the waiter, “Hey, I’m not stupid. The only difference between me and all the other people at this table is that my chair has wheels.” When he saw that the waiter was genuinely flustered, he became crestfallen and said, “I’m sorry, it’s just that I’ve had a really bad day. This is my first time out in public since my accident and a lot of people have treated me the way you just did.”

With that, service improved considerably and the rest of the meal was quite enjoyable, except of course for the return trip through the kitchen.

Although Brian handled himself very well throughout the day, he was visibly shaken by the time the boys got back to Brian’s house. Life would be a lot harder from now on and a lot of simple things that everyone else took for granted would require careful planning and a lot of improvising. As the gravity of this sunk in, they were very quiet on the trip back to the rehab center. They were much later getting back than planned and had to get security to let Brian back inside.

As the boys said goodbye to each other, Aaron said, “Brian, please remember one thing. You’re not alone in any of this. I know today was rough, but I’ll be with you every step of the way.”

For the first time since the accident, Brian broke down and cried. Aaron held him tightly in his arms and Brian finally started to share his grief.

Monday was a regular school day for Aaron, but Tuesday was Brian’s family conference and, as promised, Aaron was invited. He’d been given permission to take off from his afternoon classes. Alan and June Sandler picked him up at the school and they arrived at the rehab center with plenty of time to spare.

“Hi babe, you ready for the family meeting?” Brian asked as Aaron hugged him.

“You bet.”

“My parents around?”

“They went to grab some coffee. They should be here any minute now.”

And as if on cue, they both walked in, followed by Pattie, Brian’s social worker. She told everyone to move to the family lounge, which they promptly did, followed by Brian’s therapists, nurse, the resident and doctor. After a series of introductions, Brian’s resident, Kathy Lipton, began speaking.

“Dr. Stevens and I are responsible for handling Brian’s medical care while he’s here at the rehab center and for leading the team taking care of him. We will also follow Brian’s progress in outpatient therapies when he leaves here and Dr. Stevens will see Brian for his annual SCI checkups. There are several important medical issues that we need to discuss with you before Brian leaves the rehab center and I will start with these now.

“First of all, as you know, Brian has an increased risk of getting blood clots in his legs since he can’t move them. To counteract this, we’ve been giving him shots with a blood thinner - a special kind of heparin - and because he has no functioning muscles in his legs, he’ll need to continue those shots when he goes home. He’s been giving himself the shots and will need to do so for about another month. Now the reason we take this very seriously is that if a large blood clot forms in his legs and breaks away, it can go to his lungs and cause a pulmonary embolus, which is a blood clot that goes to the lungs. If that happens, it can be very serious and could even kill him. I don’t want to scare you, but you need to watch very carefully for any signs of a blood clot in Brian’s legs. The blood thinner helps, but it doesn’t eliminate the risk. If you see any swelling in either leg or if one of them is warm or feels hard, you need to get him to an emergency room right away. Do you have any questions about any of this?”

It was sobering to hear, but everyone understood and just nodded. Dr. Lipton continued, “Two of the other major medical issues Brian has to deal with are his bladder and his bowel function. I’ll start with the bladder. Now as you all know, Brian has been catheterizing himself four to six times a day to empty his bladder. Eventually, Brian’s bladder will start contracting on its own, but he won’t have any control over it. Worse yet, when his bladder contracts, the sphincter, which is the valve that opens to let him urinate, may contract at the same time, forcing much of his urine back up into the kidneys. Over time this can damage the kidneys, even to the point of needing to go on dialysis. That is why we will have Brian seeing a urologist on a regular basis. Once Brian starts to have spontaneous voiding, there are a number of options that he can consider to prevent having accidents and to prevent kidney damage.”

“How about the suprapubic tube?” Aaron asked.

Dr. Stevens chuckled. “I see you’ve been reading up on this. The suprapubic tube is an excellent option for quadriplegics who don’t have the use of their hands. I tend to avoid using it for two major reasons. First of all, they significantly reduce your fertility. I know that may not be a concern for you, but you never know what the future might bring and I strongly suspect that it will one day be possible for gay men to father children using genetic material from both partners.”

Aaron and Brian had never thought about the possibility of one day being parents. Dr. Stevens continued, “The other thing is that there is a slightly increased risk of bladder cancer. For these reasons and particularly because you have good hand function, I’d prefer to use medications to prevent accidents and to have Brian continue to catheterize himself. There are other options to consider as well and you can discuss them with your urologist. Do you have other questions regarding bladder function?”

When no one spoke, Dr. Lipton continued, “Bowel function is also an important issue. We use a combination of stool softeners and a stimulant laxative, senna, to keep Brian regular. The whole premise of keeping Brian continent is through a regular bowel program. This means fully evacuating his bowels every other day so that he is continent in between. Brian has learned to give himself his own suppositories and has been having good results. Eventually, Brian, you will likely run into some difficulties and you’ll need to be aware of them. First of all, you may find that some foods alter your pattern, particularly spicy foods, and may result in an unplanned bowel movement. Eventually, you’ll learn how your body reacts to certain foods, and what foods to avoid. You may also find that you can use diet alone to regulate your bowels without the need for medications, but you should do this cautiously. Eventually you may find you don’t need to use suppositories and that you can kick off your bowel program by digital stimulation alone by sticking your gloved finger into your anus and gently pulling forward. You should discuss this with us before trying it at home.”

“I could help with that,” Aaron joked and just about everyone else in the room turned red.

“The one thing you need to watch for is fecal impaction,” Dr. Lipton continued. “If you notice that your bowel program is producing poor results, it could be that your bowels are becoming filled with hardened stool. Paradoxically, your stool may become loose and watery, but this is because stuff is seeping down around the hardened stool. If this happens, you need to contact us immediately, as an impaction can also be a life-threatening emergency. Do you understand this?”

Everyone again nodded. Dr. Lipton continued, “The three remaining things I need to raise with you are, your skin, spasticity and autonomic dysreflexia. First of all, your skin. As you know, the nurses have been turning you from side to back to side every two hours when you’re in bed. Your skin will slowly build tolerance with time and we’ll start to spread this interval out while you’re here. When you go home, you’ll need to set your alarm clock to wake you up at night so you can turn yourself in bed. You’ll also need to continue to do your pressure reliefs when you’re up in your wheelchair.” With that, Brian used his arms to lift himself up off his butt for a few seconds and then let himself back down.

“Brian, you need to inspect your skin every single day. If you see any areas of redness that don’t blanch when you press on them, it means that you’ve already done some damage and need to stay off those areas until they go away. If you see any areas of blistering or breakdown, you need to call us immediately. Pressure ulcers are a serious matter that could land you in the hospital for months at a time. Do you understand this?”

Brian nodded his head. Dr. Lipton went on, “You have not had significant problems with spasticity since you’ve been here and you just need to know that we have medications that can control spasms if they become a problem for you. The bottom line is that it’s normal for muscle spasms to occur and usually that is a good thing, as it helps maintain muscle tone. However, if your spasms become severe enough to wake you or your partner at night, or if they interfere with your transfers or your self-care, we do have ways to deal with them. They may also be a sign of an infection or another problem that we can fix. You just need to let us know. Autonomic dysreflexia is another matter. Your level of injury is right on the border line. With lesions at T6 or above, your brain is disconnected from your sympathetic nervous system. Because of this, even a minor stimulus such as a full bladder can cause you’re blood pressure to shoot sky high. The most common symptom is a severe, pounding headache. If this happens, the first thing to do is to empty your bladder. If this doesn’t work, you need to look for another cause, such as a full bowel, a pressure sore or anything else that could be causing pain, even though you can’t feel it. If none of this works, go to Emergency. We don’t want you having a stroke. OK?”

“I’ve heard that AD can happen from having sex.” Aaron stated.

“Yes, that’s a common problem. If that happens, let us know and we’ll see if we can find strategies to avoid it. Speaking of sex, I know you boys must have a lot of questions about sex.”

“Actually, we’ve gotten a lot of information and advice online from other gay people with SCI,” Aaron said.

“Well if you have any further questions, feel free to call me,” Dr. Stevens added.

“I have a question,” Brian said, surprising even Aaron. “When Aaron and I have sex, we always use a condom. . . .”

“That’s a very wise thing to do, Brian. Everyone needs to practice safer sex, and especially people with disabilities.”

“Why especially?”

“Well, you aren’t able to feel your genitals and you wouldn’t know if you had an open sore. Also, your bowel program makes you more prone to hemorrhoids and other rectal lesions. These things could facilitate the spread of STDs during sex.”

“But before I met Aaron, I was a virgin, and Aaron was virgin, so why do we still need to use condoms?”

“Brian, there’s a whole room full of people here. I think this is a little personal to discuss in a family meeting,” Brian’s mother advised.

“I’m sorry for embarrassing you mom, but it’s not like I’m asking for details. These are all medical people here and I just want an answer to a simple question. Dr. Stevens, is there any reason for Aaron and I to use condoms if we were both virgins before we met?”

“Brian, you may not want to hear this, but I don’t think that any teenager is ready to promise complete and total fidelity. . . .”

“But that wasn’t my question! Look, I probably can’t ejaculate with sex, right? . . . And with my limited mobility, there’s no way I could sneak around and have sex without other people knowing about it. What I’m saying is that the risk of me transmitting an STD to Aaron is infinitesimal, right?”

“Brian, I think it would be a grave mistake to assume that you can’t transmit STDs.”

“OK, fine. . . . but could I at least have myself tested for HIV and STDs while I’m here?”

“Well, there should be an HIV test on file from when you were in Emergency, and we can look that up with your permission. The rest we can certainly test if you would like us to.”

“I’d like that very much. Thanks. I just want everyone to know that I’m completely faithful to my boyfriend.”

“That still doesn’t change anything, Brian.” Dr. Stevens said with exasperation. Rubbing his hands together, he continued, “Well, I know that this has all been a lot to absorb and I’m always happy to talk to any of you. Brian and I have already talked about his prognosis, but I know the rest of you are also involved. The degree and timing of recovery from SCI is highly variable, with any recovery occurring over a period of months or even years. As Brian may have already told you, dramatic improvement from his type of injury is uncommon, but not unheard of. I always like to hold out a little bit of hope, and there has been a lot of encouraging research in recent years. I’m more optimistic about this than I have ever been.”

“That would be nice, doc, but I’m dealing with the here and now. You know . . . my legs always feel like they’re on fire. Is that normal?”

“Have you told anyone about it, Brian?”

“No sir. I didn’t want to bother anyone.”

“Dr. Lipton, did you ever ask Brian about his level of pain?”

“No, Dr. Stevens. He never complained about it before and he always seemed so good-natured that it never dawned on me he could be in pain. The daily VAS has consistently been only a one or two.”

“But I’m not in pain,” Brian objected. “My legs just burn all the time.”

“Brian,” Dr. Stevens continued, “How bad is this feeling. On a scale from zero to ten, with zero being no discomfort at all and ten being the worst discomfort you could ever imagine, how bad is this burning feeling right now?”

“Brian thought for a moment and then said, “I guess I’d rate it at around a five, but at night it can sometimes be pretty intense . . . as high as an eight or nine.”

Dr. Stevens turned to Kathy Lipton and said, “Let this be an important lesson. Don’t ever take a person’s pain for granted. Some people just won’t complain about it unless you ask, and some like Brian won’t even think of it as pain.” He turned back to Brian. “Brian, it’s common to have phantom body pain, just as amputees have phantom limb pain. Although it may not be what you think of as pain, it hurts nonetheless and we call it neuropathic pain. Fortunately there are very good drugs for treating it. We’re going to start you tonight on a drug called pregabalin. It may make you sleepy or affect your equilibrium a bit, but it won’t take long to get used to it and we’ll increase the dosage until we get your pain under control. No one should have to live with that kind of pain. We’re here to help you.”

“Why didn’t you tell me about it?” Aaron asked.

“I just didn’t want to bother you.”

“Honey, you’ll never be a bother to me.”

The rest of the meeting was pretty mundane with each therapist explaining more to Aaron and Brian’s parents than to Brian what they were working on. There was some talk about ramps and home modifications, but little needed to be said since Brian’s parents already had the necessary information. There was also discussion on Brian’s upcoming outpatient program and a recommendation that he attend a satellite office of the rehab center, located just a few minutes from Brian’s home. Everyone agreed that that sounded like a good idea.

Finally, the neuropsychologist, Dr. Katz, spoke. “Well, I’d like to say that Brian is making progress, but frankly, he hasn’t spent a lot of time with me. Not that I haven’t offered my time, but Brian has managed to skip most of his sessions and hasn’t been all that interested in talking about what happened to him. The one thing that we did accomplish was to complete a battery of neurocognitive tests. We do this anytime someone has a loss of consciousness that suggests the possibility of a brain injury. I found no evidence of any brain damage whatsoever. In fact, as should probably be no surprise to anyone here, Brian tests extremely well. He is performing at or above the 95th percentile for his peers.

“This probably has a lot to do with why Brian has been avoiding me when it comes to talking about the psychological effects of his injury. He’s very intelligent and tends to rationalize things. Although this may appear to be the smart thing to do and it does help him with his rehab, it only helps him to avoid the grieving process that ultimately must come. In fact, all of you will go through a period of adjustment. For this reason I strongly recommend that you seek counseling after Brian is discharged.”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t come in,” Aaron chimed in, “but I had school and can’t come during the school day.” He turned to face Brian. “Honey, you really do need some counseling. I know I do. I got the name of someone from when we were in Emergency. Why don’t we go together once you’re home?”

“I dunno, Aaron. I think I’m fine now. I really don’t need any help.”

“But on Saturday, you were in tears. Why don’t you go with Aaron and just give it a try?” Brian’s mother suggested. Brian knew they wouldn’t drop it until he agreed, so he reluctantly did so.

At the end, Dr. Stevens informed Brian, his parents, and Aaron that they were shooting for a discharge date of Tuesday, one week away. Everyone was a bit surprised at how short the inpatient rehab program was, but Dr. Stevens explained that Brian had made such excellent progress that there really wasn’t any reason for him to stay longer, assuming there were no problems during his therapeutic leave the next weekend. As Dr. Stevens explained, home is itself a form of rehab and it was time for Brian to move on to the next phase of the process.

After everyone else had had their turn, the social worker stayed behind to talk to Brian’s parents about the resources available to Brian. Brian and Aaron went back to Brian’s room to talk about the discussion that came out of the family meeting.


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

18. Family & Friends

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 18 - Family & Friends

“Brian, what was all that about wanting to know about condom use and wanting to be tested for STD’s back in the family meeting?”

“Aaron, look. You’re all I’ve got. I know we talked about taking our time and waiting to make a commitment, and I know you made a promise to your parents. I respect that and I certainly don’t want to make you feel guilty or put you under pressure or anything, but I nearly died in that car crash and I consider every day from here on a blessing.

“Let’s face it, if I lose you, I’m not going to find another lover . . . maybe a companion, but not another lover. I trust you implicitly and I know in my heart that you won’t violate my trust. God knows, you’ve every right to find a more suitable lover . . . and if you do, I trust you’ll tell me.

“I’ve made my decision, babe. With or without you, I’ve made my commitment to you. I want you . . . all of you . . . without any barriers between us.”

“Brian . . . I’m fully committed to you, too. I’ll never leave you. After all we’ve been through together in the last weeks and months, I know you’re the only person I’ll ever need, but Brian, I can’t go against my parents wishes.”

“I know that and I respect that. The only barrier that’ll make a difference to me, however, is when you wear a condom when I suck you off. Aaron, I want to be able to taste you. I want to feel the texture of your dick on my tongue. I want to feel your hot cum sliding down my throat. Now that I have nothing else but my mouth, this will give me more pleasure than any other aspect of sex. If you want to use a condom when you fuck me or suck me, that’s fine, but when I suck you, it’ll be me who’s at risk, not you. I really do trust you, you know.”

“I trust you, too, Brian. I trust you completely.”

“If it’ll make you feel any better, have yourself checked for STD’s, too. . . .”

“I don’t have any STDs . . . you know that, but it might make our parents more comfortable with the idea of us having unprotected sex.”

“You want to talk to our parents about this?”

“God no! It was embarrassing enough when my mom talked to me about using condoms in the first place.”

“Then what are we gonna do? I know you felt terrible about the one time we didn’t use condoms in the shower, but you have to get over it, Aaron. Please, just give me this one thing. Tell your parents if you feel you have to, but don’t expect me to wait.”

Aaron was taken aback by Brian’s directness. He knew he could never talk to his parents about sex - at least not directly - but he would always feel guilty when having unprotected sex if he didn’t do something about it.

With resolve, Aaron stood up and walked out of the room, leaving a baffled Brian behind. He returned a few minutes later, with Dr. Stevens in tow.

“So what is it you boys would like to talk to me about that you couldn’t discuss in the family meeting? Something tells me it has something to do with sex.”

“Brian and I have been talking about what he can get out of sex now that he’s paraplegic. . . .” Aaron started to say. “Brian told me that the most pleasurable thing he can do now is to have oral sex with me, but it won’t be enjoyable to him if I wear a condom. That’s what he was trying to get at in the family meeting. To tell you the truth, I’d like to perform oral sex on Brian, too, but I’m not sure I could even get a condom to stay on him if he didn’t get fully hard. The problem is that I promised my parents that I’d always use a condom.”

“So what you’re both saying is that you’d like to have unprotected oral sex with each other, but you promised your parents you wouldn’t, and you want me to give you my blessing instead?”

“Not exactly,” Aaron replied. “I’d like you to talk to my parents about it. I know you don’t think it’s a good idea, but just tell them that there is no risk to either of us so long as we were virgins to begin with, and so long as we’re faithful to each other. Also tell them that the risk from unprotected oral sex is relatively small. We’re willing to get tested and we’ll wait until the test results come back clean. I don’t think they would take our word for it and it would mean a lot more if you could speak to them.”

“Aaron, I understand where you’re coming from. . . . believe me, I do. I understand how important this is to both of you, but if I talk to your parents, I’m obligated to talk to Brian’s as well. I’m not going to sugar-coat this and if they ask me for my opinion, I’m going to tell them what I already told you in the family meeting. I’m perfectly happy to talk to them, but only under these conditions.”

“Doc, I’m afraid that if you talk to my parents, they’re gonna say I can’t have sex at all,” Brian countered. “They may even say we can’t see each other any more. I wouldn’t even be in this wheelchair if it weren’t for them and the way they treated Aaron.”

“It’s your decision, boys,” Dr. Stevens interjected, “but if you feel strongly about taking risks by having unprotected oral sex, you need to be willing to take the risk that your parents will say ‘no’.”

“Brian, you’ve asked a lot of me,” Aaron added. “Your parents have come a long way in accepting me and in accepting that you’re gay. I think we have to trust them now.”

“OK, Doc, you can speak to my parents, too.”

The boys were very nervous as Dr. Stevens left the room, and they sat in silence for several minutes before either one spoke.

“Aaron, there’s one other important thing.” Brian began. “I’m not sure you’ve had a chance to think about it, but I don’t want to go back in the closet. I’ve been out here in rehab and it’s been OK. Even Kalvin seems to be cool with it. It just feels so much more natural to be able to be myself and not have to worry about people finding out about us, but I’m going to need you there by my side.”

“School’s a lot different than rehab, Brian.”

“Yeah, I know that, but we already have a lot of friends who know about us and the faculty advisors in the GSA are there. I think we can handle it.”

“Well, I was wondering how to tell you anyway, but we’re already pretty much out at school already.”

“What? Did Gary or Roger spill the beans?”

“You noticed them looking at us when they visited? Yeah, they approached me at school to ask if we’re a couple. Brian, I know I probably should have waited until we could talk to them together, but I wasn’t going to lie to them. So, yeah, I told them we were, and they were OK with it. In fact they told me that some of the other guys in the band have wondered about us for a while. But to answer to your question, no, it wasn’t them. They swore they would keep our secret until we’re ready to come out.”

“But if it wasn’t them, then who?”

“Actually, our school is a real rumor mill and while a lot of people have come up to me, wanting to know how you’re doing, more than a few clearly were trying to find out if the rumors were true. Of course I didn’t say anything, but I didn’t deny it either. So, yeah, I’d say we’re pretty much out anyway.”

“Well, everyone will know soon enough, but it’ll be cool to be able to be ourselves in public. So what if people make fun of us? The joke’ll be on them.”

The boys were kissing passionately when Brian’s parents entered the room. His mother cleared her throat and the boys pulled apart. Brian’s father said nothing, which made it evident that he had indeed come a long way. Brian started to panic when he saw his parents, however, and Aaron’s eyes flew open wide, knowing that his own parents had probably spoken with Dr. Stevens.

Seeing the looks of distress on the boys’ faces, Alan Sandler spoke to allay his son’s fears. “In case you’re wondering, we spoke with Dr. Stevens about you and Aaron. I don’t think you should be having sex at your age, but . . . Dr. Stevens made me think about what it was like for me when I was a teenager. Although I was a little bit older than you when I lost my virginity, there was no going back once I started.”

Both boys blushed furiously at Alan’s confession.

“We aren’t going to stop you from being together. . . . Believe me, I’ve learned my lesson there . . . but we have a lot to think about.”

“Don’t worry, honey,” Ruth added, speaking directly to her son. “We’re going to do what’s best for you, but we need a little more time to think about what Dr. Stevens said.”

Aaron and Brian were relieved, but still very nervous when they parted later that evening.

The following evening, Bill Epstein stopped by the Johnson home to give Aaron and his parents an update on their case.

“Aaron, it’s good to see you. So how’s Brian doing?”

“He’s doing good, Bill. I mean it’s been rough and I know he’s been putting up a brave front for all of us, but he’s made great progress at the Rehab Center. I can’t wait till he comes home next week!”

“That’s wonderful, Aaron. Speaking of which, there’s some stuff we need to talk about. I’ve got some good news and some bad. Let me start with the bad news first.

“I had a meeting with the ADA handling your case yesterday. I had hoped that, with the overwhelming evidence we’ve collected, she’d simply drop all charges against you. A more seasoned prosecutor would have taken the time to actually look at the evidence, but she only recently joined the county DA’s office and she wants to be sure proper procedure is followed. So I’m afraid we’re going to have to proceed with the adjudicatory hearing.”

“Shit! I mean, damn! I mean . . .”

“It’s OK, Aaron, I said the same thing once I was out of earshot of the ADA.”

“So when’s this hearing going to take place?

“I thought we’d have more time, but with the thirty day limitation and the judge’s schedule, they set it for the eighth.”

“The eighth? Next Wednesday? On my birthday?”

“Some birthday present, huh? But seriously, I think it will end up being a great birthday. After we present our evidence, the worst that could happen is the judge would decide to take the case to trial which, with the evidence we’ve gathered, just ain’t gonna happen.”

“So what’s the good news?”

“We’ve got the analysis back on the paint samples taken from your mother’s car, and we now have definitive proof that you were struck by a Ford vehicle, specifically a Ford Expedition or Explorer. That, coupled with the debris found at the accident scene, pretty much clinches our claim that you were first struck by another vehicle, forcing you into the telephone pole.”

“That’s great news, Bill.”

“So what happens now?” Jim Johnson asked.

“We go to the hearing and present all of our evidence. My accident scene investigator will be there in case we need him to testify as to the validity of the evidence. Brian’s parents will also testify on your behalf, as they’ve promised to do. When did you say Brian’s being released from the rehab center?”

“He’s being released next Tuesday.”

“Ah, that’s perfect timing. It’ll really bolster our case to have your victim testify on your behalf, particularly since he can testify that he saw the SUV hit your car.

“Oh, and Aaron, I really need to go over your testimony in advance of the hearing with you. Although these hearings are very informal, I still don’t want you freaking out or anything. Having you practice what you’ll say will give you confidence during the real thing. Do you think we could spend a few hours tomorrow after school?”

“Sure, Bill. It’ll beat doing homework.”

“Not that you’ll get out of homework,” Ruth Johnson added with a parental glare.

The rest of the week passed quickly and soon it was time for Brian’s second and final therapeutic leave.

Brian’s parents thought it might be nice for everyone to go to church that day, as it had been quite a while since Brian had been, and they thought it wouldn’t hurt for everyone to give thanks that he’d come through his ordeal. Neither Brian nor Aaron, nor especially Adam were crazy about the idea, but they knew how much it meant to Brian’s parents. They decided to go along with it, although they weren’t religious. Ruth and Jim picked up Brian and Aaron in the Jetta at the Sandlers. June, Aaron and Adam were delegated to the back seat, while Brian rode shotgun for the ease of entry. Alan and June went in their SUV.

The prayer service was OK, but then the minister got up to give his sermon, which was on the evils of homosexuality. Needless to say, this made the boys very uncomfortable, but it didn’t stop there.

It was a real fire and brimstone speech that was exceptionally extreme, even for the fairly conservative congregation. The minister quoted chapter and verse and used example after example to drive home the point. It became more humiliating when he kept staring at Brian and Aaron. It wasn’t that he just looked at them occasionally, but his eyes lingered on the two of them to the point that it was obvious his sermon was aimed at them.

After a while, Brian boldly took Aaron’s hand and held it tightly. Aaron squeezed back. A few people around them noticed this and looked away, but a woman nearby looked at them and smiled.

The minister, however, glared right at them and continued, “It’s sad that even in the face of God’s punishment, some choose to ignore His will.”

Suddenly, Brian’s father got up and walked to the pulpit. He turned to the minister and said, “Excuse me, reverend, but there’s something I must say to you and the rest of the congregation.” He practically shoved the minister aside and stepped up to the mike.

“My name is Alan Sandler and I’ve been a member of this congregation for more than a dozen years. As many of you know, my son, Brian, was recently involved in an accident that has left him paralyzed from the chest down. I believe this is what the reverend was just referring to as ‘God’s punishment’. You see, my son is gay. Until recently, I felt very much the way the reverend does and, undoubtedly, the way a lot of you do as well. But instead of this accident being a punishment, if anything it has brought us closer together.

“The accident tore our lives apart. It has been Hell for all of us, and yet not one of you has done anything to help me or my family. Other than a few cards, not one of you has even bothered to call us, or to visit my son in the hospital, or to offer help to us in our time of need.

“My son’s boyfriend, Aaron, on the other hand, has been there from the beginning. At first we shut him out, because of what he was, and because of what we thought he had done to our son. But he didn’t make Brian gay. Brian was born gay and I know that now. Then we continued to shut him out because he was driving the car at the time of the accident, but he did not cause the accident . . . it was a hit-and-run driver who did this to my son. Since we let Aaron into our lives, he has been an inspiration to us all. His love for my son has been selfless, and he’s helped us in immeasurable ways. I’m proud that Aaron is my son’s boyfriend. I am proud of both my boys.

“Is what they’re doing a sin? That is for God to decide . . . not us. Does God hate them because they’re gay? Look at them. . . . they’re children! But in many ways they’re more grown up than most of the people in this room. They’ve faced severe adversity, and they continue to face it every day, and they’ve risen to the occasion. They are good, decent human beings, and they’re selfless. They’re truly doing God’s work to the best of their abilities, which is more than I can say for most of the people in this room, and particularly for the reverend.” He turned to the minister and said, “No offense, Reverend, but you could learn a lot from my boys. They may not be going to Heaven, but until you stop deigning yourself to be God’s Judge and Jury, they’re a Hell of a lot closer to Heaven than you’ll ever be.”

As Brian’s father walked back to his seat, a few of the congregants rose and started to applaud including Ruth, Jim and Adam. A few more rose and then a few more. Although far from a standing ovation, it was more than a token gesture, with perhaps twenty percent of the congregation expressing their approval for Mr. Sandler’s remarks.

However, that didn’t stop him from doing what he’d already planned. He gathered up his ‘sons’ and his wife and they left the sanctuary, Brian’s wheelchair in the lead, followed by Aaron, Jim, Ruth, and Adam. Together, they exited the church for the last time.

Once outside, Brian’s dad said, “I still believe in God, but I can’t go back there. We’ll look for a more tolerant congregation.”

Aaron and Brian were in utter shock. Neither one could believe how Alan Sandler stood up for them. Brian reached out and hugged his father and when he was done, Aaron did the same, followed by his wife and the Johnsons. Nothing, however, could have prepared them for what Alan Sandler said next.

“You know boys, things were very different when I was growing up. The word ‘gay’ meant happy and people just didn’t talk about homosexuality. Kids joked about people who were ‘queer’ much as they do today, but the implications were much more harsh then, and my parents were even more fervent in their religious beliefs than we are. I firmly believed that homosexuality was the work of Satan himself, and the possibility that I might be gay never once entered my mind.

“I told you a while back that I would one day tell you how I knew that it’s possible for someone gay to become straight. Well, I realize now that’s not really a choice anyone can make. The fact that I dated girls and married had nothing to do with being straight or gay . . . it was because I didn’t even acknowledge that there was another way. I thought the feelings I had were evil and had to be suppressed, and suppress them I did until I was forced to confront them by your accident and by my June, who is a much more astute person than I’d ever realized before.

“What I guess I’m saying is that, like you, I was born gay. I forced myself to live a straight life and I guess that I’m truly bisexual now, as I really do have a strong physical attraction to June and I love her very much. Our love is much stronger than mere sex and I’ve absolutely no regrets about what I am today. If I had it to do over again, sure, I’d probably do things differently, but the fact of the matter is that I can’t do things over again, nor would I necessarily want to. I have a great life, a wonderful loving wife and two incredible ‘sons’ of whom I couldn’t be more proud. I’m glad that you two have the chance to live the life I denied myself. At times, life will be cruel to you because you’re gay, just as it was in there today, but the love you share is something special and you’re much stronger than almost anyone I’ve known, myself included.

“Brian, because of everything that’s happened, I want you both to know that Aaron is welcome in our home at anytime and that he can spend the night with you providing that Ruth and Jim approve.”

Jim and Ruth Johnson provided big smiles and nodded their heads in agreement. They, too, were overwhelmed at the words and actions of Alan Sandler this Sunday morning.

Alan continued, “Brian, although I still don’t agree with teenagers having sex, your Mom and I will honor your privacy when you’re in your room and the door is closed. We trust both of you to be responsible when you’re together. I only ask that you and Aaron consider that sex brings about powerful emotions that can be overwhelming. You may feel that you’re mature, but you have a long way to go in learning to deal with sex, and love. For these reasons, I sincerely hope that you will choose to wait until you’re adults and ready to make a full commitment to one another.”

“But what about the stuff Dr. Stevens talked to you about?” Brian asked.

“Your mother and I have talked quite a bit with Aaron’s parents about it, and we’ve decided that we trust you. If you do decide to have sex, we expect you to be honest with each other, to be completely faithful to each other and to use protection. If you feel you can’t use protection for . . . um . . . certain things, then you have to think first about the other person and tell them if you have ever been unfaithful.” Alan turned to face Aaron and said, “And that goes for you, too, Aaron.”

“Don’t worry, Mr. Sandler, I would never be unfaithful to Brian, and I would rather die than do anything to hurt him.”

“And of course you need to wait until your STD tests come back clean,” Ruth added.

“Of course we will, Mom, and the results will come back clean.”

“Now that I’ve bared my heart and a piece of my soul to you folks, I think we better get out of here before the congregation starts leaving the church. Maybe with what I said in there, the reverend may stir up a lynch mob!” Alan concluded with a smile.

On the way home, in the Jetta, Aaron pondered about a conversation he had with his mother a short time after the accident.

“Mom,” Aaron said with a big smile, “You’re a miracle worker. None of this today would have happened if you hadn’t spoken to Brian’s mom.”

“Well Aaron, after our little conversation at the restaurant, all I expected to get was a little understanding of what both you and Brian were going through. Today, I can only say that I’m happy for Alan and June.”

“I really have to look up to that man.” Jim declared. “What he did today, took a lot of courage in that he faced who he really is. Brian, you should be very proud of your Dad.”

“Believe me Mr. Johnson, I am. It’s going to take me a while to get to know my ‘new’ Dad. I never thought I’d hear him say what he did in church this morning.”

Back at the Sandler home, Brian wasted little time in ushering Aaron into his room, shutting the door behind them. They immediately started making out, savoring the taste of each other’s tongues in their mouths. Although Aaron wasn’t sure he wanted to test the waters just yet, especially with both sets of parents just down the hall in the great room, Brian wasted little time in rubbing Aaron’s dick through his jeans. Aaron felt his member swell even more as his boyfriend lovingly rubbed it up and down. Just as Brian reached for Aaron’s zipper, there was a knock at the door. Before they even had a chance to answer it, the door swung open and Larry and Adam stepped inside.

“Hey studs,” Larry said as he surveyed the situation. “Hope I wasn’t interrupting anything,” he said with a smirk.

“You know you were,” Brian responded. “So, how’s your self-control these days,” came Brian’s retort, recalling how Larry had cum almost immediately the night he lost his virginity at their New Year’s party.

Larry blushed crimson as he replied, “Not that it’s any of your business, but Cindy’s been having a real good time lately. . . . Oh, Aaron, my dad’s here. He’d like to talk to you.”

Reluctantly, Aaron left Brian’s room, leaving Brian, Adam and Larry some time to catch up with each other. He headed down the hall to the great room, where he found Bill Epstein sipping on some coffee and sitting in a chair across from his parents. Aaron sat down in the other chair, next to Larry’s father.

“Aaron, I was just telling your parents about some wonderful news.”

“What is it?” Aaron asked, noticing that his parents were positively beaming.

“We found the vehicle that hit you.”

Really?” Aaron shouted as he jumped up and pulled Bill out of his chair, enveloping him in a tight hug.

“Yes, Aaron, really,” Bill replied as he pried himself loose. “It was right under our noses, or I should say, the sheriff’s office’s noses, the whole time. How they missed making the connection, I’ll never know. It’s not like there were that many accidents that night. The Ford Expedition that hit you was involved in a second accident not long after it hit you. The driver was drunk as a skunk. He ran off the side of the road, flipped it several times, and was thrown out of the vehicle. He wasn’t wearing his seat belt and was DOA. His blood alcohol was more than twice the legal limit. The SUV has been in the impound lot all along, and we were able to positively match the debris found at your accident site to that vehicle. There’s no doubt about it. I just got word today from the investigator I hired to track it down.”

“Does this mean we can skip the hearing?” Aaron asked.

“Unfortunately, not at this late a date, and besides, there’s still that little issue of your driving without a license.”

“Oh yeah, I almost forgot about that,” Aaron said as his mood became more subdued. “I guess that means I won’t be driving until I’m eighteen.”

“Not necessarily. As I explained to your dad a few days ago, Brian’s parents aren’t going to be able to be there for him 24/7. He’s going to need you. The federal government mandates that the county provide accessible transportation to everyone, but services around here are pathetic. They’ll send a lift van alright, but it often shows up two hours after you needed to be at your appointment. We’re going to argue that you need your license to provide transportation for Brian to attend school, his doctor and therapy appointments, and to partake in any school’s extracurricular activities. That, and the fact that you have a sterling record, should give us a good shot at getting the charge waved.”

“But, I’m still not sure I want it just yet. Not after what happened.”

“Which is one of the reasons you need to drive, Aaron.” Jim Johnson added, “You need to get back out there and drive. Besides which, you heard what Bill said. Brian’s going to need you to drive him around. Remember what I said, ‘face your demons’? I think today, Alan gave us a good demonstration of that.” Jim, Ruth and June looked at Alan and smiled as Brian wheeled into the room; Adam and Larry following.

“Um, OK. I know you’re right. I guess it would be cool to be able to drive Brian around, at least until he gets his own license.”

Larry looked at Aaron. “Aaron, we were talkin’ in the bedroom, and we feel this is a lot for you to have on your shoulders. I just want you and everyone here to know that if Aaron needs a backup to help Brian, for any reason, I’ll be around to help. Who’s to say; Aaron you may have a cold or the flu one day. Count on me OK?”

Aaron stood up and hugged Larry. “If you weren’t so straight, I’d kiss you.”

“Me too!” Brian said from his chair. The room broke into laughter. The tensions of the day were suddenly relieved.

Later that evening, after they’d returned Brian to the Rehab Center, Aaron found himself lying awake in bed. He thought about the whirlwind of the day’s events and the complete change he’d witnessed in Brian’s father. Thinking about the upcoming hearing was scary, but having his honey come home far outweighed the negative emotions he might have otherwise felt.

He felt alive again - he and Brian had both their parents’ blessings! And God, Brian was so sexy! So he might be in a wheelchair. So his dick might not work. He felt sad for Brian, but somehow he knew that he could make it up to Brian. With his help, Brian would resume a satisfying sexual life. Together they would have a great life together.

As Aaron lay there, his dick began to grow hard. He thought about having sex with that beautiful boy of his and the temperature in the room seemed to rise. That beautiful face. Those piercing blue eyes. Those sensuous lips. That luscious tongue. Those firm, sensual nipples. God, he wanted him!

Aaron started to stroke his own hard-on, slowly at first and then more rapidly. As he stroked, he thought about Brian stroking him - about Brian sucking on him. And he could feel Brian’s love washing over him. He felt a tingling pleasure building in his balls and work its way up through his body. The pleasure built and shot out through the head of his dick, sending spurt after spurt of cum onto his face, his chest and his belly. It had been days since he’d jerked off and he couldn’t believe the duration of his orgasm and the amount of cum. Slowly the waves of pleasure started to subside and Aaron returned from his high.

He drifted off to a pleasant, restful sleep - the first in ages.

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As you may have guessed, there’s a bit of me in Alan Sandler’s confession - not that I’m religious, but I grew up at a time when homosexuality was considered a mental disorder - and I certainly didn’t want to have a mental illness, and I was in major denial.

I have one parting thought, however. Although Aaron and Brian have decided to dispense with the use of protection for oral sex, this was not necessarily a wise decision. Children often make bad choices and they usually lack the maturity to fully appreciate the consequences. Sadly, this is commonly the case with adults as well. Having a disability is not an excuse for dispensing with the use of condoms and, in fact, the risks often are greater than among the able-bodied population for the reasons already cited and because the types of accidents and injuries that lead to disability are commonly seen in association with other risk-taking behaviors - behaviors that may include unsafe sexual practices.

If a monogamous couple decides to dispense with safer sex practices, there are a number of steps that can and should be followed to prevent the transmission of STDs. First of all, complete testing for common STDs, including HIV, must be done no less than six months after the last sexual encounter with anyone outside of the relationship. This is essential, as HIV can have a latency of up to six months during which it is not detectable in common screening tests. The couple should either abstain from sex or practice safer sex techniques until the tests come back clean. The couple must remain faithful from then on, and even then, it’s advisable to have STD testing repeated every six months until both members are comfortable with the permanence of the relationship. If the couple is heterosexual, of course it goes without saying that they need to practice contraception.

That’s all for now, and be safe!

I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

19. Homecoming

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 19 - Homecoming

Aaron awoke with excitement the morning of Tuesday, March 7. His honey was coming home! Aaron didn’t want Brian to have to spend a second more at the rehab center than was absolutely necessary, and so he and his parents arrived at eight o’clock, although discharge wasn’t until ten. Thanks to Aaron’s exuberance in getting the ‘team’ in to see Brian first thing, he was cleared for discharge a full hour ahead of time. Brian wasn’t crazy about leaving the wheelchair he’d been using at the rehab center behind, but another would be waiting for him when he got home. They were on their way by nine. Brian rode shotgun while Aaron sat in back along with his mother. Jim drove.

They pulled up to Brian’s house at 10:15. The ramp was in place, but the bathroom modifications wouldn’t be finished for another month. In the meantime, Brian would have to settle for using a bedside commode. That, and Brian’s other equipment, were delivered to Brian’s parents earlier that morning, as was his temporary wheelchair. His parents met him with the old clunker of a wheelchair - it wasn’t much to look at - but he’d have a brand new ‘hot’ set of wheels in another couple of months. Everyone went inside. Brian and Aaron went to Brian’s room while the parents remained in the great room and chatted. Not wanting to interrupt his brother and his friend’s reunion, Adam quietly slipped away to Mr. Sandler’s study, where he went on-line and worked on his homework.

Once inside his room with the door closed behind them, Brian looked up at Aaron and smiled. Aaron reached down and allowed their lips to become reacquainted. “You don’t know how long I’ve waited for this,” Aaron said.

“Oh, I think I have an idea.” Brian replied as he rubbed Aaron’s hard-on through his pants. Aaron moaned softly as his dick strained under his pants. “Let me see if I can do something about this,” Brian said as he unzipped the zipper and reached inside. He pulled Aaron’s dick out through the fly in his boxers and took the full length into his hand and started stroking it. Aaron moaned a little louder. “I got the results of my STD tests,” Brian said as he continued to stroke Aaron. “Mine came up clean. Did you get your test results back yet?”

“I sure did. Do you even need to ask how they turned out?” Aaron replied with a broad smile.

Brian then leaned forward and went down on Aaron, sucking the full length of his beautiful dick, which was leaking precum like crazy. “I’ve really missed that taste.” Brian went to work, furiously sucking on Aaron’s manhood, bobbing up and down with a ferocity even he didn’t know he had. Aaron wanted to hold back. He desperately tried to push Brian off of him, but he was soon overwhelmed by the feelings of joy that pulsed through his dick. It had been days since Aaron had jerked off and he was more than ready. Before long, Brian was rewarded with six strong spurts of Aaron’s spunk that coated his tongue and every crevice in his mouth, before sliding down his throat. Brian and Aaron were both in heaven.

“Like you said, I still gotta mouth.”

“And what an incredible mouth it is at that,” Aaron said as he leaned down and enjoyed a passionate kiss, tasting the remnants of his cum on Brian’s tongue. “I know you enjoyed that, but is there something I could do for you in return?”

“There’s a lot of stuff I’d like to try, but right now, I just want to take all of this in. It’s good to be home, but a little scary, too.”

Aaron hadn’t thought of that. He could only imagine what Brian must be going through. His life - both their lives in a sense - had been in suspended animation while Brian was in the hospital and at the rehab center.

Now he was back in the real world, and he’d likely be in that wheelchair for the rest of his life. Aaron noticed that Brian was tearing up.

“Why?” Brian asked as he started to cry in earnest. “Why did it have to happen to me?” Aaron kneeled in front of Brian and urged him forward, letting Brian rest his head on Aaron’s shoulder. They just sat there, hugging each other for a long time.

“I’d do anything to change places with you, Brian. Nothing pains me more than to see you in this wheelchair. I was the one driving. It shoulda been me.” Aaron soothed Brian and gently stroked his beautiful long hair.

“No, Aaron. It wasn’t your fault. And what happened to me was a freak accident. Please don’t feel guilty about it, and believe me, it would kill me to think of you being the one in a wheelchair. Given the choice, I’m glad it’s me and not you, but it still stinks that it happened at all.”

Both boys were sobbing uncontrollably when they heard Aaron’s mom call out, telling them it was time for lunch. They dried each other’s tears and made themselves more presentable before rejoining their parents.

Aaron asked, “Mom, Dad, Mr. and Mrs. Sandler, would it be OK if I spend the night here with Brian? I think he needs me here tonight. I don’t want him to sleep alone.”

Ruth took a passing glance at Brian’s eyes and realized what was needed. “It’s OK with us, son, if it’s OK with the Sandlers, but you have to get up early tomorrow. Remember, your hearing’s tomorrow.”

“How could I forget? Happy birthday to me.” Aaron said sarcastically.

June followed Ruth’s glance and came to the same intuitive conclusion. “Yes, Aaron, you can spend the night here if you wish.”

“What do you say we all go out for a nice lunch.” Alan suggested, “Let’s go to that bread place by the mall. It may not be elegant, but it’s 100% accessible and the food’s great.”

“Works for me,” Jim replied.

After lunch, Ruth suddenly remembered something. “Guys, I hope you don’t mind, but I have to pick up a new dress at the mall. I picked it out last week to wear to the hearing tomorrow, but the store didn’t have it in my size. They called to say it came in on Monday, but it completely slipped my mind. It’ll only take a few minutes. I hope you don’t mind.”

Since there were no objections, they all headed across the way in their cars to the mall, and parked in front of the department store that Ruth had indicated.

Once inside the store, June said, “You know, there are some really great sales going on, and I need some new clothes for spring. Would you all mind if we stayed here a while?”

“I could definitely use some new clothes, too, June,” Ruth replied, getting groans from the men and the boys.

“Well, I think we have little choice,” Alan said. “When women decide they need to shop, there’s nothing that can stop ’em.”

“We don’t want to stay out too late with the hearing and all, however,” Jim added. “Maybe we could all meet up at the gazebo at, say, five o’clock? We can order some pizza and pick it up on the way home.”

“That’s a great idea,” Alan replied. “June and I will pick up the pizza while you guys take Brian home.”

Brian suddenly thought of something. “Dad, could I have your help? I need a new battery for my watch, and we might as well have it replaced while we’re here.”

“Why don’t you and Aaron go take care of it?”

“No!” Brian answered, surprising everyone, especially Aaron. “I, ah . . . my watch has a strange warrantee. The battery can only be replaced at certain jewelry stores, and I can’t remember which ones. For some reason, you have to pay by credit card, so I need an adult to go with me.”

“OK, Brian, I’ll be happy to go with you if you need me to.”

Just as Aaron was about to head off with Brian and Alan, Brian stopped and said, “Aaron, this could take a while and it’ll be pretty boring. Why don’t you go look at some stuff for yourself and we can meet up later. I’ll call you on your cell phone when I’m done.”

“Okay . . .” Aaron said, thinking it very strange that Brian wouldn’t want him with him.

“Aaron, there’s something I’d like to look at with you anyway,” Jim said, pulling Aaron out of his state of confusion.

“Sure Dad.”

Once Brian and Alan were out of earshot, Jim said to his son, “It’s actually very convenient for us that Brian decided to go off without you. It makes it a lot easier for me to get you away from him. We’re going to have a small ‘welcome home’ celebration when we get home . . . nothing special, just the six of us . . . and it would be nice if you had something to give him.”

“Boy, with everything going on, I never even thought about getting Brian a gift, but you’re right. I definitely would like to get him something special. I guess he won’t need a new watch,” Aaron chuckled. “What do you think, Dad? Any ideas?”

“Well, it should be something nice, but something that ‘speaks’ of being from you.”

“Maybe a bracelet?”

“Like an ID bracelet with your name on it? Aaron, I think that would be a very nice gift, but we need to find a place that can engrave it today.”

“I guess that means the jewelry stores. We’ll have to be careful that Brian doesn’t see us while he searches for a place that can fix his watch.”

“Let’s quickly head to the other end of the mall . . . Brian and his dad will probably start at this end.”

“Great idea, Dad.”

Aaron and Jim quickly headed to the far end of the mall. The first place they visited couldn’t have anything engraved in less than a day, and the next store didn’t have anything nice. The third store they visited had something even better than what Aaron was looking for, but it was over $250. That was a sizable chunk of Aaron’s savings, and he would need his parents approval to spend that much. It was a gold-framed ID bracelet with a face that was anodized with the rainbow colors that symbolized gay pride. It was perfect.

“Aaron, I think that’s a lot to spend. However, this is an important occasion. If this is what you want to give Brian, then you have our permission to buy it with your savings.”

“Thanks, Dad,” Aaron said as he hugged his father in front of all the other customers. He blushed a little when he noticed some people smiling at them.

“What would you like engraved on it?” the sales clerk asked.

“On the front side should be my name, Aaron. On the back it should read, ‘Yours always’.”

“I’m giving you 25 percent off,” the sales clerk added. “I think it’s cool that you’re brave enough to be ‘out’ in high school, and to let a boy wear your name on his wrist.”

“Then wish us luck, ’cause we only came out recently, and not everyone knows about us yet.”

“You’ve got it,” said the young man behind the counter, “and from my boyfriend, too,” he added as he winked. “The bracelet will be ready in an hour if you’d like to stop back then.”

“You can count on it,” Aaron replied.

Just then, Aaron’s cell phone went off. It was Brian saying he was ready to meet up with him.

“Go ahead, Aaron, you should be with your boy.”

“Could you do me a favor and pick up the bracelet for me, Dad? I don’t want Brian to suspect anything. I want it to be a surprise.”

“I’d be happy to, Aaron.”

Things seemed a lot easier for Aaron and Brian compared to the last time they had visited the mall together. Perhaps it was because they knew what to expect, or perhaps it was because Brian was home and they were happier, but they found themselves totally enjoying themselves as they spent the rest of the afternoon together. When Aaron’s cell phone went off, he could scarcely believe that he and Brian were nearly ten minutes late for meeting up with their parents.

When they got home, Aaron could have sworn he heard noises from inside the house as they approached the front door. Thinking it his imagination, he opened the door to Brian’s house and followed his boyfriend inside. They were greeted with a thunderous shout of, “Surprise!” from a group of their friends.

Waiting in the great room for them were, Larry and Cindy, Adam and Jenny, Scott and his new boyfriend, Jared, and Jackie and Sharon, as well as some of Brian’s friends from the school band, and some of Aaron’s friends as well. Hung over the fireplace was a banner that read, “Welcome Home Brian” on one line and “Happy 16th Aaron” on the next.

Aaron and Brian were truly speechless. Neither one had expected anything like this.

“So are you two going to kiss each other already?” Adam called out.

Seeing a room full of smiling faces, Aaron realized that everyone there obviously knew about them and he was pleased they were all OK with it. Taking his brother’s advice, he leaned down and planted a short, but passionate kiss on Brian’s lips. There were ‘oohs’ and ‘ahs’ and some whistling, and then everyone applauded. Both boys’ faces turned a deep shade of crimson.

Turning toward his parents, Aaron asked, “You knew about this, didn’t you?”

“You don’t really think I would have waited until the last minute to pick up a dress for tomorrow’s hearing, do you?”

Brian’s parents then walked in the door carrying several large pizzas. “Welcome home, son. Happy birthday, Aaron.” Mr. Sandler said as he put the pizzas down on the kitchen counter.

“All right . . . food!” Larry exclaimed.

It didn’t take long for the crowd of hungry teenagers and the four parents to finish off the pizzas, along with several two liter bottles of soft drinks. The boys and their friends had a great time, enjoying cake and ice cream, playing games and just having fun while the parents stayed in the background.

When it came to the exchange of presents, Larry and Cindy gave Aaron and Brian each a new video game, Adam and Jenny gave them a few CD’s and Scott and Jared had gotten them subscriptions to a couple of gay porn sites, obtained with the help of Jared’s older brother. Jackie and Sharon gave Aaron a stuffed bear dressed in a convict suit with a little note attached that said, ‘X-rated bear for the ex-convict.’ Everyone had a good laugh when they found out it was ‘anatomically correct’. For Brian, they had gotten a stuffed bear in a wheelchair.

“Where the Hell did you find this?”

“Brian, they make teddy bears for just about every conceivable minority these days.”

Finally, it was Aaron and Brian’s turns to exchange gifts, except that neither knew the other had gotten something. Brian quickly excused himself for just a minute and retrieved his gift for Aaron from the packages his father had brought in. He gave Aaron a small box. Aaron opened the box and inside was a solitary diamond stud earring. “This must have cost you a pretty penny!”

“Not half as pretty as you’ll be wearing that diamond in your ear, stud.”

“You know I’ll have to ask my parents about this, Brian.”

“I wouldn’t have bought this for you if I hadn’t already gotten their permission, thanks to your brother, I might add. You gotta give me some credit, ya know.”

Aaron decided to give Brian credit in the best way he knew how, with a long, passionate kiss. When he finally came up for air, he noticed that his guests were also kissing their own dates, which made him smile.

“When in the world did you have time to get this for me?” Aaron asked.

“Well, uh . . . my watch really didn’t need a new battery. I really had planned to get you an earring, but there wasn’t time while I was in rehab. Our trip to the mall provided the perfect opportunity.”

“Just a minute, Brian. I have something for you, too.”

Aaron quickly retrieved the ID bracelet from his father, and handed the flat gift-wrapped box to Brian.”

After opening it, Brian exclaimed, “Oh, Aaron, it’s beautiful.” He showed it to all their guests, who nodded with their appreciation. “I’m gonna wear this proudly. I want everyone to know that I’m lucky enough to have the best boyfriend in the world.” The boys kissed again as everyone else clapped and hooted.

Because tomorrow was a school day, the party wound down a bit early, at nine o’clock. After the guests had left, Brian and Aaron once again found themselves behind Brian’s closed door.

“You know, Aaron, things are gonna be different. For one thing, I need to cath myself before we get started with any kind of sex. Otherwise I may pee on us in the midst of our passion.”

“Well, maybe I’m into that.”


“Seriously, could I cath you? I’d like to learn how anyway, and it would be kinda sexy.”

“There’s nothing sexy about a cath but, sure, you’re welcome to do it. I’ll teach you how. Let’s go to the bathroom.”

Brian got out the supplies while Aaron filled the sink with warm water. Brian had Aaron wash his hands and then explained the procedure to him.

“The last time you saw me do this, I was using a sterile technique. That’s because every time I do it, there’s a 1-3% chance of introducing bacteria and there are some pretty nasty bugs in hospitals ’cause of all the antibiotics they use. Now that I’m home, we can get by with a clean technique. This silicone catheter,” Brian held it up to show Aaron, “can be boiled and reused. Rather than swabbing my dick head with Betadine, you can just wash it with soap and water.”

Aaron proceeded to do so. Brian held up a tube of KY jelly and Aaron raised his eyebrows.

“Not for that, silly. You need to use this to lube up the tip of the catheter. Now grab hold of my dick and pull it straight up in the air, angling it slightly upward toward my face. Yeah, that’s perfect. Now take the lubed-up catheter and slide it into my piss slit.” Aaron actually did find it erotic seeing the catheter disappear up Brian’s penis. Brian continued, “Be sure to stick the other end in the urinal, or we’ll have a major mess on our hands. You may feel some resistance when you hit the sphincter.”

Aaron couldn’t help but laugh, thinking about the other sphincter he’d like to penetrate. Just then, he popped through and a yellow stream started to fill the urinal.

Aaron removed the catheter, emptied the urinal, and washed up. He returned to Brian’s bed, lay down next to him and the two boys resumed kissing each other passionately. Aaron reached down and started playing with Brian’s nipples, tweaking them and pinching them with his hands.

“God, Aaron, that feels great.”

Aaron started nibbling on Brian’s left ear, then licked inside and started kissing his way down Brian’s neck. He licked, sucked, and gently bit at his left nipple, and then his right one while he simultaneously lightly stroked Brian’s skin, just a couple inches below the nipples, recalling that the ‘zone of injury’ is often highly erotic.

“Oh man, Aaron. That feels awesome. Keep doin’ it.”

Aaron of course wasn’t about to let his lover down, so he kept it up for several more minutes before returning to Brian’s lips and kissing him passionately. After a bit, he pulled back and looked Brian squarely in the eyes.

“May I?” was all he said.

“Of course, if you want to, but remember that I don’t have feeling down there, so it’s gonna feel different. I don’t know what will happen, so please take it slow.”

Aaron did just that, grabbing Brian’s flaccid dick and gently stroking it while he licked the head with his tongue. Before long Brian’s dick was at full attention, but Aaron quickly found that stopping his ministrations for even a second caused it to go soft again. Even licking Brian’s balls or licking at his delicate hole left Aaron looking at a flaccid, lifeless dick. It seemed that only direct stimulation worked, so Aaron went back to working on Brian’s cock-head with a little more fervor, licking it, sucking on it, and eventually swallowing his dick whole and going up and down on it.

“Aaron, it feels kinda weird.”

What do you mean, Brian?”

“Well, although I can’t feel you directly, my whole body starts tingling and my legs burn somethin’ terrible.”

“I’m sorry, honey.”

“No, no. It feels good! Keep doin’ it. I like it!”

“Any headaches?

“None so far.”

Aaron got back to work, licking and sucking at Brian’s dick. In short order, he felt Brian shiver and his legs started to spasm. Brian developed gooseflesh over his thighs and abdomen and he broke out in a profuse sweat over his torso and face.

“Are you OK?”

Brian looked back dreamily at Aaron and said, “Yeah. I had a pounding headache for just a few seconds, but it wasn’t all that bad. And something felt really good. I can’t exactly describe it. It felt like an orgasm, and yet it didn’t. I’m not sure how to describe it, but it was pretty good.”

“I bet you had a retro.”

“A retro?”

“A retrograde ejaculation. It probably went back into your bladder. Wanna check it out?”


“Got another catheter?”

Brian told Aaron where to find one and Aaron once again washed Brian’s dick-head and lubed up and passed a catheter into his bladder. Rather than using a urinal this time, he waited until he saw a milky fluid flowing and then put his mouth on the other end and sucked it out. Because they’d just catheterized him, there was only a little urine in Brian’s bladder and what Aaron sucked out of him was nearly all semen. To Aaron it was pure manna, as he tasted his lover’s sweet cum for the first time in months. Aaron withdrew the catheter, sucking the last remnants dry as he did so, and then crawled up beside his lover and started kissing him passionately. Brian tasted himself on Aaron and couldn’t help but smile.

“It’s nice to know I can still cum.”

“Yeah. Did you enjoy it?”

“Yeah, I did . . . and knowing you enjoyed it made it extra special.”

“We’ll keep working on it. Maybe eventually we’ll learn how to make it come out the front way.”

“That would be nice.” Brian looked directly at Aaron and said, “Now it’s my turn to return the favor.”

With that, Brian urgently kissed Aaron and their tongues pushed into each other. He licked at Aaron’s ears and kissed down his neck, slowly and passionately licking, sucking, and gently biting each of his nipples. As he did, he felt Aaron’s boner just rubbing against his ‘zone of injury’, which felt amazingly erotic. When Aaron felt what Brian was doing, he started humping Brian’s chest, driving both boys crazy with excitement. Brian had been intending to continue downward to suck Aaron’s cock, but this was just feeling too good. It was driving Brian crazy and the fact that he was enjoying it so much drove Aaron over the edge. Aaron shot out five powerful spurts of cum onto Brian’s chest and his own abdomen. Brian licked up what he could from Aaron and used his discarded shirt to clean himself up.

He then put his boxers on and wheeled himself across the hall to get ready for bed, thinking how nice it would be when his own bathroom was finished. Aaron followed and got himself ready as well. When they returned to Brian’s room, Brian set the alarm clock for three AM.

“Sorry I have to do this, honey, but I have to get up during the night to cath myself and to turn myself in bed.”

“It’s a small price to pay for keeping you next to me, babe.”

Brian fixed up some pillows along one side of his bed and used them to keep him on his right side, and then Aaron lay down next to him, kissed him on the lips, and draped his arm across Brian’s chest. Spooning would have to wait until Brian’s skin developed more tolerance. They slept this way until the alarm went off. Aaron again did Brian’s cath - he really enjoyed doing this one task for him. Brian reversed the pillows and lay on his left side, with Aaron now behind him and again, Aaron draped his arm across Brian’s chest. They were still laying that way when the alarm went off at seven.

The dreaded day of the hearing was upon them.


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

20. Sweet Sixteen

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 20 - Sweet Sixteen

Aaron woke up to the piercing sound of Brian’s alarm clock. This was the first time he had spent the night at Brian’s house, and at first, he was disoriented. The first thing he saw was a wall of pillows, but he could feel Brian’s chest rising and falling under his hand. Aaron slid his hand up and down Brian’s chest, bringing it to rest over his lover’s nipple. Slowly he started circling Brian’s nipple with his index finger.

“Mmm, what a beautiful way to wake up,” Brian said as he tried unsuccessfully to turn his head to face his boyfriend. Instead, Aaron got up and walked around the bed to face Brian and gave him a gentle, but passionate kiss. Brian responded in kind and then said, “Happy birthday, my sweet sixteen.” They kissed a bit longer, but then realized that they really needed to get going for their court appearance at nine AM.

Getting Brian ready was definitely more involved than it used to be, and this wasn’t even a bowel program day. Once his bathroom was finished, he’d be able to do everything by himself, but for the moment, he really needed Aaron’s help. After cathing and giving himself his blood thinner shot, he got himself onto his commode chair and Aaron wheeled him across the hall and proceeded to give him a sponge bath. Washing Brian’s hair took a lot of work and left the bathroom floor a complete mess, which he had to clean up using many, many towels. Brian put on his own deodorant and brushed his teeth while Aaron took a shower, got himself ready and even shaved - something he was needing to do a bit more frequently now than just a few months back. The boys returned to Brian’s room and got themselves dressed. By then, Brian’s mom had breakfast waiting for them.

“Good morning, boys. Happy birthday, Aaron. Are you ready for your big day?”

“I’m sorry, but I feel more like I’m ready to puke,” Aaron said. “I just can’t wait for it all to be over. I just hope I’ll be coming home tonight.”

“Of course you will, sweetheart. You know what happened, and Bill has ironclad proof that the accident wasn’t our fault. You’ll be fine.”

“I know that, Mrs. Sandler, but that doesn’t make it any easier. I’m just out of the shower and already I feel like I need another one.”

“I mean it, Aaron. You’ll do fine. Now I hope you don’t mind, but I made you a light breakfast, figuring that your stomach would be feeling jittery.” She started putting food on the table. “We have oatmeal, yogurt, bananas, whole wheat toast with jam, and some tea.”

Aaron was thankful for the food - it really did settle his stomach down. Just as he finished his breakfast, his parents arrived in their Jetta to transport Brian and Aaron to the hearing.

Aaron’s nervousness returned as they approached Juvenile Hall and the memories of the more than 24 hours he’d spent there came flooding back. Sensing this, Brian looked over the front seat and with reassurance, said, “Don’t worry, babe. Everything’ll be fine.” All Aaron could do was to weakly smile back at his lover.

The courtroom was a different one than the one he’d been in for his detention hearing. The feeling was different, too, as he approached it from the main lobby, rather than being led in handcuffs from the jail. Bill Epstein was waiting for him outside the courtroom. They all took a seat on a long bench outside the courtroom. Aaron noticed that there were a number of families, similarly situated, throughout the courtroom lobby area.

“Now Aaron,” Mr. Epstein began, “I know we rehearsed this extensively, but don’t worry if things don’t go exactly the way we rehearsed it. That doesn’t mean anything’s wrong or that things aren’t going our way. The most important thing is to be honest and to answer every question truthfully.” Aaron nodded his head as his good friend’s father, his lawyer, continued to speak. “Just as with the detention hearing, the adjudicatory hearing is informal. You’ll still be under oath, but it will only be the judge, the prosecutor and the witnesses for both sides. There’s no jury. There is a court reporter taking down everything in case we have to appeal. Besides the prosecutor, the judge may also ask questions of any of you at any time and in any order, so it’s not nearly as regimented as anything you may have seen on TV. Again, don’t be worried if the judge puts you on the spot - she’ll very likely do that, and it’s just her way of seeking clarification.”


“Yeah, your judge today is Pamela Jenkins. She and I were good friends in high school. We even dated a few times, but don’t think that she’ll go any easier on you because we’re friends. She’s a fair and honest judge, but she’s also tough as nails.”

“Okay . . . “

“Seriously, Aaron, I don’t think we have anything to worry about. Oh, and I have some good news. Brian, this affects you, too.” Brian wheeled his wheelchair over so he could be part of the conversation.

“I’ve been in contact with the insurance company for the guy who hit you. Obviously, they would like to make this whole thing go away, but they would like to get out of it if they can. I’ve therefore filed a motion in court to have the accident report amended to reflect what the evidence we’ve gathered shows actually happened. Once their insured is directly linked to your accident, they’ll have little choice but to settle or face a lengthy lawsuit. We’re actually kind of lucky in one regard. The SUV was owned by a large construction company, and under a large commercial umbrella policy. They’ve seen the evidence, however, and we have a tentative settlement offer in the low seven figures.”

Both boys’ mouths dropped open as they mentally added up the number of zeros. “Given the gravity of Brian’s injuries, however, that’s not nearly enough. The fact that they’re willing to put that much money on the table so early in the negotiations is a very good sign. I think you boys will be in very good shape when this is all over.”

“I’d rather have my legs, Mr. Epstein . . . and the use of certain . . . other equipment,” Brian said with a respectable blush.

“Of course you would, Brian, but having enough for you to go to the proper schools, to cover all of the medical expenses you’ll encounter over the years and to pay for attendant care if you need it someday, is at least a step in the right direction. Besides, you and Aaron deserve compensation for pain and suffering and all the mental anguish this has caused you and your families. No one should have to go through what you’ve gone through.”

Just then, an overweight, balding older man walked up to them. Bill turned to him and said, “ Harvey ! It’s so nice of you to join us.”

“I’m sorry, Bill, I got hung up in traffic getting out of the city. And don’t give me any of that ‘late because I’m lazy look’. They haven’t even unlocked the courtroom doors yet.”

“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean it’s OK to give me a heart attack.” Bill turned to Aaron and Brian and said, “Boys, this is Harvey Lasserman. He’s the sleuth who went out to the accident scene and gathered all the evidence for you. He’s here to testify on your behalf. He’ll also testify in our lawsuit, if it goes to trial. He’s been with the city’s accident scene investigation team for more than twenty years and is one of the most respected names around.”

The boys each shook Mr. Lasserman’s hand and thanked him for all his work, just as the courtroom doors swung open. It was another case name that was announced, and so they were left to remain outside in the lobby, waiting for Aaron’s case to be called. The wait was interminable as the boys chatted with each other, Bill chatted with Harvey , and the two sets of parents chatted with each other.

Aaron and Brian couldn’t help but wonder what their parents were talking about and if they were talking about them. The frequent glances by their parents at them seemed to confirm their worst fears.

Finally, at just after eleven o’clock, they were called into the courtroom. The judge was already seated at the bench, and the prosecutor who had been present at the detention hearing was also seated at a table to the left. The bailiff and a court reporter were also present. Just as the Sandler/Johnson/Epstein entourage entered the courtroom, Judge Jenkins called out, “Bill, it’s good to see you.”

“Hello, your honor, it’s always a pleasure.”

“And Harvey , what brings you out here?”

“A botched accident investigation, but we’ll get that cleared up in short order.”

Getting down to business, the judge swore everyone in who would be testifying in the case, including Brian and his parents in addition to Aaron, his parents and Mr. Lasserman. The charges against Aaron were then read into the record.

“Now that we’ve gotten the preliminaries out of the way, Ms. Walton, would you care to present the county’s case?”

“Certainly, your honor. First of all, I was just given a copy of Mr. Lasserman’s report and findings two days ago. After having reviewed them thoroughly, and having discussed this matter at some length with the county investigator who initially investigated this accident, the county wishes to dismiss the charge of negligent bodily harm against the defendant.”

“What?” Aaron said under his breath as Bill smiled at him.

“A motion was filed yesterday to amend the accident report, based on new evidence that has come to light since the initial investigation was completed. Although it will be some time before the motion is acted upon, our office has reviewed the evidence presented and must conclude that the defendant’s version of events is fully supported by the evidence. Our initial assessment that he was driving northbound on Elm and simply lost control of his vehicle is apparently incorrect and the result of some rather sloppy work by the investigator, who will no longer be serving in that capacity with our department. There clearly was another vehicle involved and that vehicle has been identified. The driver of that vehicle was Mr. Stanley Lancaster of Terrence Drive, and he was killed later that night when he drove his vehicle off the road. His BAC was .22 - more than twice the legal limit. In other words, the defendant’s vehicle was struck by a hit-and-run drunk driver, forcing it into a telephone pole. It is apparent that there is nothing the defendant could have done to prevent the accident.”

“I see . . .” The judge responded. “Ms. Walton, do you still intend to prosecute the charge of driving without a license?”

“We do, your honor.”

The judge turned to Aaron and asked him to step up to the bench. Bill approached with Aaron. “Aaron, I’ve read the report of the interview the sheriff’s office conducted with you after the accident. I understand that you were not properly Mirandized at the time, nor were you properly advised of the right to parental consent, and I can just as easily strike that interview from the record if you wish, but I think that the interview may help you more than hurt you in this case. What do you wish me to do?”

Bill simply nodded at Aaron and he responded, “You may use the interview. It’s an accurate reflection of what happened.”

“Aaron,” Judge Jenkins continued, “I certainly understand the pressure you were under, and what you were trying to do to try to protect Brian, but you clearly broke the law. Is there anything you have to say for yourself?”

“Yes, your honor. I know that what I did was wrong and I’d give anything to trade places with Brian. I love him more than I love life itself, but it wasn’t my driving without a license that night that caused the accident. It was a drunk driver that did this. Even if Brian’s ride had showed up, he might still have been injured that night, or even killed.

“I’m very regretful for my actions. I realize now that I should have called Brian’s parents and explained the situation, no matter what the consequences. By trying to avoid being outed to them, I put Brian and myself in danger. It was a mistake, but a mistake made because of love.”

“Mr. and Mrs. Sandler, how do you feel about what Aaron did?”

Alan spoke for the both of them as June nodded her head. “We both support Aaron in this matter. Although I don’t approve of his having driven without a license, I can’t blame him in the least bit for what he did. Aaron was right about what would have happened. We would have not only kept the boys apart, but we would likely have sent our son to a reprogramming center to have him brainwashed into not being gay . . . something we now know is impossible. Aaron did the wrong thing, but for the right reasons.”

“Mr. and Mrs. Johnson,” the judge inquired, “Do you agree with Mr. Sandler’s statement?”

“Yes your honor, we do,” Jim began. “Until this incident, we provided an upbringing for Aaron and his brother Adam, based on trust and honesty. Except for this time, neither boy has ever given us reason to think that our trust wasn’t well founded. I agree with Alan Sandler. . . . Aaron had good reason to drive that night, however wrong it may have been. I feel certain that, because of his honesty to all of us throughout this incident, Aaron will never betray our trust again.”

“Thank you for your insight Mr. Sandler and Mr. Johnson.” Judge Jenkins acknowledged. “Mr. Esptstein, have you anything to add?”

“Your honor,” Bill began, “there is another issue you might want to consider. Brian is going to need transportation to and from school activities and extracurricular events. For example, he is in the school band and would no longer be able to participate if transportation were not available. He will also need transportation for his physical therapy appointments. We both know how inadequate the county’s paratransit program is in meeting the needs of our citizens with disabilities. Inasmuch as Mr. and Mrs. Sandler are heavily involved in their professions and as they could never afford to hire private transportation, allowing Aaron to drive would make a tremendous difference in Brian’s quality of life.”

“Brian,” Pamela Jenkins said quietly, “Do you feel that Aaron Johnson has the ability to provide you with reliable transportation and any assistance that you will need to attend school and other appointments?”

“Yes your honor, I do,” Brian replied. “He’s been by my side as much as he possibly could be since the accident. He attended many of my rehabilitation therapies with me and even went out of his way to search the Internet for information I might need.” Brian blushed as he continued. “He even made contact with other gay people with spinal cord injuries to learn what it will take to maintain our relationship. Your honor, we’re in this for life and I trust him completely.”

“Very well, then,” Judge Jenkins started, “Brian, Aaron, trust and honesty is the best foundation upon which to build a relationship. I’m sure you both will need a lot of both in the coming years. Aaron, I’ve made my decision. This being your first offense, I’m willing to handle this by non-adjudication. What that means is that the charge will be held in abeyance until you turn eighteen, at which time it will be dropped. You will be able to get your license today assuming, of course, you pass the exam,” she said as she winked at him. “However, if you get so much as a speeding ticket in the next two years, the charge will come back at you in full force and your license will likely be suspended. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

“You bet, your honor,” Aaron said with a broad grin on his face.

“Very well, then, we’re done here,” the judge said as she brought the gavel down.

Once they were out of the courtroom, Bill Epstein approached Aaron and his parents and quietly said, “Aaron, if you wish, I think we may have a case for false arrest against the county, and possibly a federal action for violation of your civil rights. The ADA admitted they botched the accident scene investigation. The motion to amend the report is pretty much a formality now. The transcript of the initial interview with you, which you fortunately allowed to be entered into evidence, also demonstrates that the detective who interviewed you is a homophobic prick.”

Aaron chuckled at his attorney’s comment.

“Now I have to tell you that successful execution of a false arrest claim is as rare as hens teeth. A lawsuit against the county could take at least two years and could result in your being subjected to minor harassment. A civil rights claim might be a bit more straightforward, but it would still be a long shot and could also take years. With your permission, I’d like to look into our options, but I won’t make any promises.”

“That’s OK, Bill, I appreciate everything you’ve done for me, but I couldn’t care less if I ever set foot in a courtroom again. Just the thought of a lawsuit against the creep that did this to Brian sends shivers down my spine. No, Bill, as much as I hate what was done to me, spending any more time in court after today would only worsen the effect of what has already happened. I want justice for Brian, but I’m not out for revenge.”

Mr. Epstein turned to Aaron’s parents and said, “You have an amazing and mature young man here. He must make you proud.”

“We couldn’t be more proud of him,” Jim replied.

“And he’s all mine,” Brian chimed in.

“Anyway, happy birthday, Aaron, and congratulations!”

“Thanks, Bill, and thanks for everything you’ve done for me.”

“It’s nothing, Aaron. You’re family.”

Aaron and Bill Epstein hugged each other briefly. Mr. Lasserman got their attention to say his goodbyes, and Aaron and his parents thanked him profusely for his help in clearing Aaron.

Since everyone was already dressed, they went out for lunch at a fine restaurant nearby. Aaron was surprised when his parents ordered steak - they almost never ate red meat, let alone having steak for lunch - but today was a special day of celebration. Slowly it dawned on Aaron that it was all over. It really wasn’t all his fault. It was that damned drunk driver.

After lunch, everyone went to the downtown motor vehicles branch and made it all official. With his court order in hand, Aaron was allowed to take his “written” test, which he passed at 100%, and because he had passed his school’s driver’s ed program, the road test was waived. He whooped for joy as he was issued his very own driver’s license, although he did wince when he saw the horrible picture on it. As he was finishing up, Aaron’s dad got a call on his cell phone. Aaron heard him talk for a little bit and say, “That’s wonderful news.” He was curious, but didn’t ask what the call was about.

Aaron assumed they would be heading home from there and was surprised when they didn’t seem to be heading in the right direction. He was utterly flabbergasted, however, when they pulled up to a Honda dealership, and Brian’s parents followed them in.

“It’s high time we replaced your mother’s car, don’t ya think?” Aaron’s dad said. Once inside, his dad asked to speak to a particular salesman and it was evident that this had all been arranged. They then went outside and someone drove up with a new 2006 dark blue hybrid Accord with a beige leather interior, sun roof, alloy wheels, navigation system - the car was fully loaded.

“With Brian and his wheelchair, we thought it would be a good idea to have a car with a little more room than the Jetta. Besides, its gas mileage is nearly as good, and its safety rating is one of the best.”

Aaron was taking it all in when someone drove up another Accord - this one similarly appointed, but in white with a dark grey leather interior.

“This one’s going to be my car, honey,” June Sandler said to Brian. “We obviously need a car that isn’t an SUV, so we decided to get this car after hearing about the Johnsons’ decision. This time it was Brian who was blown away. Finally, out of nowhere a third Accord suddenly appeared. This one was a red two-door coupe with a grey cloth interior, but it still had a sunroof, alloy wheels and the navigation system.

“Happy birthday, Aaron.”

Aaron turned and looked at his father as it slowly began to dawn on him that this was his car. His car. He was absolutely beside himself. It might not have been the set of wheels he would have chosen for himself, but it was his. All he could say was, “How?”

“We’d have done this anyway, Aaron and if you were listening to Bill Epstein at all, it should be dawning on you that you’re not going to be poor. While we were in the restaurant, however, we got a call from Bill and he had some great news. The drunk driver’s insurance company has agreed to our settlement counteroffer. We can talk about the details later, and it’s not really a lot of money, considering everything, but suffice it to say that you and Brian will have enough to get a fair shake in life. And let’s face it, with Brian in a wheelchair, you’re going to need your own car. We got a two-door so that Brian can even drive it himself when he’s old enough and he can stash his wheelchair behind the seat. You probably didn’t notice it yet, but it’s also equipped with hand controls. Brian’ll need a car with hand controls when he takes driver’s ed this summer. I hope you don’t mind sharing your car with him.”

Mind? How could he mind? Aaron was absolutely speechless. Instead, he just threw his arms around his father and hugged him with all his might, even though his broken ribs still hurt a bit, and then he did the same with his mom. Brian was equally speechless and he also hugged Aaron’s parents, nearly running over their feet with his wheelchair in the process.

After all the papers were filled out, it was time to go home.

“OK boys,” Ruth said as she approached her new car. “We’ll see you later this evening. . . . I suddenly feel like a piece of birthday cake,” she said with a wicked grin. “Drive safely.”

“I will Mom. I love you.” Aaron said as he realized with trepidation that the only way to get his car home was to drive it himself. This would be his first time driving since the accident and he was more than a little nervous.

Sensing this, Brian said, “It’s OK, honey. I’ll be there, right by your side. You know you can do this.” Without even waiting, Brian opened the passenger door and transferred himself to the shotgun seat, and demonstrated just how easy it was for him to stow his own wheelchair behind his seat. “Well, what are you waiting for?” Brian yelled out to Aaron, and then in a quieter voice, he added, “I haven’t cathed sinced this morning!”

“Good God, Brian, can you do that? I mean it’s been, what, eight hours? I thought you had to do it every four hours.”

“It’s definitely not recommended. The one saving grace is that I haven’t had much to drink, either. There could be complications, however, so let’s hurry! Ah, but not too fast. . . . I don’t want you to get a speeding ticket.”

With Brian’s encouragement, Aaron sat in the driver’s seat of his new car, adjusted the mirrors, checked over the location of all the basic controls, inserted the key and started his baby up. He turned on the radio and tuned in his favorite jazz station, which met with Brian’s quick approval. The drive to Brian’s house was completely uneventful and Aaron felt a newfound confidence as he pulled into the driveway. After getting out of the car, it was first things first - the bathroom for Brian! Aaron, of course, was more than willing to lend his assistance.

After finishing their necessities, the boys returned to Brian’s room to enjoy a little quiet time together. Both sets of parents agreed to allow Aaron to spend the night again, as tonight Aaron needed Brian as much as Brian had needed Aaron. The hearing was behind them, and Brian’s first day back at school since the accident was just ahead. Not only that, but tomorrow would be both boys first day back as an ‘out’ couple.

They started out planning to have a little fun together, but they were both exhausted. The hearing had been grueling, and the excitement of getting Aaron’s car had worn them out. They started out cuddling and making out, but quickly fell asleep in each other’s arms.

June woke them up at eight o’clock so they could eat dinner. She had prepared a simple meal of baked chicken with sweet potatoes and green beans, followed by left over birthday cake for dessert. Aaron’s parents had left for home earlier, not wishing to wake their son and Brian.

After dinner, Aaron and Brian returned to Brian’s room to play video games for a while. Their game play eventually turned into foreplay.

“Did anyone ever tell you, you have the most beautiful eyes?” Aaron asked after parting from a passionate kiss. “They’re the color of the Caribbean Sea . Such a beautiful shade of blue I’ve never seen. I could get lost looking into your eyes. I’ll never tire of seeing my reflection in your eyes. I can see the love behind them, and I can see the beauty of your soul.”

“That’s beautiful, Aaron, but it’s your eyes that are so beautiful. They remind me of amber waves of grain . . . such a perfect golden shade has never been found anywhere else on earth. I will never tire of seeing myself reflected in your eyes. I love you more than words can ever say. Behind those eyes, I see the most beautiful, kind, perfect soul in the universe. I am truly blessed to know you. If I could walk again, but were the cost to have never met you, there would be no choice. I’d rather spend one millisecond with you than have a lifetime of the use of my legs.”

Aaron’s eyes teared up as he heard Brian’s words. Rather than let his boyfriend see him cry, he relieved the moment in the best way he knew how, by placing his lips firmly on Brian’s. As he kissed his love, he hugged him tightly. Eventually, he unbuttoned Brian’s shirt, pulling the hem out from his pants. Although Brian's "turtle shell" brace was largely in the way, the openings for his arms left his nipples exposed, and Aaron wasted little time stroking them with his thumbs. As Aaron stroked a bit lower, he crossed over Brian's zone of injury and felt Brian shudder under the power of his light touch.”

“Would you rather I not touch you there?” Aaron asked.

“Ordinarily it’s a little sensitive to touch, but when you touch it that way, it feels good. . . . Real good. There’s only one problem, though. . . . You’re wearing way too many clothes.”

“And I bet you know how to take care of that.”

“You bet I do,” Brian said as he proceeded to lift up the hem of Aaron’s shirt and pull his shirt off. Brian removed Aaron’s right sneaker, and then the sock underneath. He lovingly caressed Aaron’s foot, then lightly kissed the top of each toe. He similarly removed Aaron’s left sneaker and sock, and kissed each toe. He then placed the soles of Aaron’s feet against his own chest, the ball of each foot over his nipples and the toes against his neck. Brian had never felt anything so erotic in his life. Aaron’s feet were sitting on Brian’s most erogenous zones, and he was loving it. As Brian massaged Aaron’s feet, Aaron felt aroused himself. He lay back on Brian's bed, enjoying the sensations coursing through his body.

Aaron sat back up and, following Brian’s lead, removed each of Brian’s sneakers and socks, enjoying the silky feel of the soles of Brian’s feet. Recognizing there were still barriers to his enjoyment, however, he said, “We still have way too many clothes on.”

Reluctantly, Brian lowered Aaron’s feet, transferred himself to his bed and began to unbuckle his own belt. Aaron did the same and soon, with the exception of Brian’s brace, they were both naked. Brian leaned back against his headboard and Aaron lifted his feet back up to Brian, and although a bit confused, Brian took them back in his hands an placed them back on his chest, enjoying their feel against his nipples, neck and throat.

Aaron spread his legs apart and grabbed hold of Brian’s feet. Placing the soles of Brian’s feet against his dick and balls, he was amazed at how aroused this made him feel. He’d never thought he had a foot fetish, but he couldn’t deny that this felt great.

Seeing what Aaron was doing, Brian started to rub Aaron’s feet around on his chest and against his nipples, stimulating his zone of injury in the process. He Took Aaron’s toes up onto his face and kissed them. Tentatively, he stuck his tongue out and licked between Aaron’s toes. Although he never thought he would, he enjoyed the scent and the taste. Brian became progressively more aroused as he continued to stimulate his zone of injury and his nipples with Aaron’s feet.

Aaron rubbed his dick with Brian’s feet, thrusting as best he could from an awkward position. Awkward or not, it felt great. A soft moan escaped Aaron’s lips and Brian smiled.

“Go for it, babe. Cum for me,” Brian crowed. “Cum with everything you have, and I’ll have my own orgasm from what your love is doing to me.”

Aaron sped up his thrusting and rubbing and Brian did the same with the rubbing of Aaron’s feet on his chest. The feeling of Brian’s soft soles sliding along the underside of his dick as well as against his balls was too much and he soon felt his balls drawing up, tight against his body. Jet after jet of his hot cum spurted out the end of his dick, landing on Brian’s feet as well as Aaron’s groin. For his part, Brian moaned out loud as he felt waves of pleasure spread through his body. He swore he could almost feel his orgasm spread through the head of his dick. Although it wasn’t a true orgasm, it felt remarkably close.

“Good God, Aaron, that was amazing.”

“Yeah, it was . . . but how could it be amazing for you when you can’t feel anything?”

“But I did feel something, Aaron. The feeling of your feet on my nipples and across my zone of injury was amazing. It really did arouse me.”

“It aroused me, too.”

“That’s not all, Aaron. I really felt like I had an orgasm. I swear, I really felt something down below. It almost felt like it came out my dick.”

Aaron started chuckling. Soon that chuckle became a full laugh and, before long, Aaron was in hysterics.

“What’s so funny?” Brian asked.

“Well, I’ve heard of phantom sensation and phantom pain, but this is the first time I’ve ever heard of a phantom orgasm.”

Brian couldn’t help it. Soon he was laughing hysterically, too.

After they came down a bit from their laughter and from their earlier orgasmic highs, Aaron used his shirt to clean up himself, and Brian’s feet. He did his best to dry off the sheets below where their love making session had occurred.

“Brian, thanks for giving me an amazing birthday.”

“And thank you for giving me an amazing homecoming.”

“I guess we’d better get to bed. Tomorrow’s a big day.”

“You would have to remind me of that. . . .”


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

21. Back to Reality

I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 21 - Back to Reality

Thursday was another big day for Aaron and Brian. It was to be their first day back at school since Brian’s accident, and their first day at school as an ‘out’ gay couple. For Brian, however, it was also a bowel program day for Brian, which meant getting up extra early.

Although Brian was the one doing it, Aaron was a bit grossed out by the ordeal. Not that Aaron wouldn’t have minded sticking a suppository up Brian’s ass - indeed, he had his own ideas about what he’d like to stick up there - however, the ensuing bowel movement was anything but pleasant. Until Brian’s bathroom modifications were completed, they’d have to use his commode chair, which consisted of a waterproof wheelchair with a padded toilet seat and a removable bucket underneath. It took all Aaron’s willpower for to keep from throwing up as Brian's bowels slowly emptied themselves over the next 45 minutes. Once Brian’s bathroom was finished, Brian would be able to clean himself up in the shower, but for now Aaron had to deal with the clean-up.

As they finished up, Aaron realized that, were it not for the time, this would an ideal opportunity for sexual exploration. After all, there was nothing like a clean ass for good gay sex, not to mention that he’d learned from his chats on the internet that having sex after a bowel program was the best way to avoid messy complications.

“You know, Brian, it might be good if you could switch your bowel program to the evening. That way we’d be able to do stuff together afterwards.”

Brian thought about it for a minute and said, “Good idea, Aaron! I’ll take my senna tomorrow morning and take an extra dose at noon, and then we can get with the new program tomorrow night. That’d be cool.”

Aaron finished bathing the rest of Brian, then went about taking his own shower and getting himself ready for school. As he’d shaved yesterday, he wouldn’t need to again until tomorrow morning. Once dressed, the boys headed to the kitchen for breakfast. Alan Sandler had already left for work.

“Good morning boys,” June said. “I’m running a bit late, but I made some scrambled eggs and toast for your breakfast. It took a while for you guys to get ready this morning. Is everything OK?”

“Yeah, we’re fine, we had to do a bowel program this morning.” Brian explained. “I’m glad Aaron was there to help.”

“Me too!” June said as she smiled. She gave both Aaron and Brian a peck on the cheek. “Gotta go. Hope you both have a good day,” she added as she was closing the front door.

After Aaron and Brian finished their breakfast and put their dishes in the dishwasher, they grabbed their books and headed out to Aaron’s car. ‘Wow!’ Aaron thought to himself, ‘My own car!’

The drive to school was a short one and took a hell of a lot less time than taking the school bus ever had. Aaron pulled up in front of the school into one of the handicapped-accessible spaces. His parents had taken care of getting handicapped plates for his car, so he’d always be able to park there rather than in the much more distant student lot. Nevertheless, he’d still need to get a parking sticker for his car.

Now came the moment of truth. They were early, but the kids from the first bus routes were already there and the looks began as soon as Brian got his wheelchair from behind his seat. Although there were some 4000 students attending their high school, there were only a few of them who used wheelchairs, and now Brian was one of them. With his head held high, he wheeled himself up to the school entrance and went inside, with Aaron following close behind.

Once inside, the situation became much worse for Brian. Kids were blatantly staring at him - it was merciless. Both boys knew that it was only natural and they would have probably been doing the same thing in other circumstances. How long, Aaron wondered, before they would learn to politely look away instead of staring - the effect being no better in the end. Why couldn’t people see the person rather than the chair?

Then Aaron had an idea. . . . He knew he had to do something to focus everyone’s attention away from the wheelchair and he knew just what could do it, but what he had in mind would be taking a big step. He knew people pretty much knew that he and Brian were a couple, but confirming it openly was another matter. However, he was proud to be gay and even more proud to be Brian’s boyfriend, and so he took his right hand and placed it squarely on Brian’s shoulder. He could feel Brian shudder slightly as he made contact and he imagined the nervousness coursing through Brian, but with so many kids openly staring at them, he figured they had nothing to lose.

Rubbing Brian’s shoulder slightly as he walked while Brian wheeled down the hall, they were no longer looking at Brian, the kid in the wheelchair and his friend, Aaron. Now they were Brian and Aaron, an openly gay couple. The effect was almost immediate. Some of the kids continued to stare at the two of them, even more so now that it was evident they were gay, but more than a few kids actually smiled at them as if to say that they were OK with them being gay. In an instant, the wheelchair seemed to fade away and Brian was a human again. It felt good to be out. He knew the feeling wouldn’t last and that there would undoubtedly be some confrontations, but this felt so right.

They made their way to the main office, where Aaron got his parking sticker and Brian got a revised class schedule, helping to minimize distances between his classes. Brian also received an assignment to a locker that was more accessible, as well as an elevator key. Brian was thankful that he, Aaron, Larry, Cindy, Scott, Jared, Sharon and Jackie now, all shared the same lunch period.

Aaron walked Brian to his first class and got him settled in. A table had been set up in the back of the room - apparently the school’s concession to making ‘reasonable accommodation’ under the Americans with Disabilities Act. Aaron couldn’t help but think how much this sucked. Brian liked to sit up in the front with the other smart kids, rather than in the back with all the doofuses and trouble-makers. Aaron hoped Brian would be OK as he made his way to his own first class.

At lunch, Aaron asked Brian how things were going. Although Aaron had experienced his share of insults that day, Brian seemed to be devastated.

“I never knew there were so many fucking jerks in our school,” Brian said. Aaron and their friends knew how upset Brian must be, as he seldom used profanity. Brian elaborated, “Try wheeling down a corridor filled with kids more interested in getting the latest gossip than in getting to class. Yet if I stopped to talk to someone, kids glared at me for being in the way! The kids in the back of the classes kept calling me ‘fag’ and ‘queer’ and kept saying it was a good thing I’m in a wheelchair, or they’d beat the crap out of me.”

“That really sucks,” Larry added. “Why don’t we make an appointment to see Mr. Sampson. I’ll bet he’ll know how to deal with those homophobic bastards.”

“That’s a good idea,” Aaron added. They then settled into talking about school, classes and the like.

At the end of the school day, Aaron drove Brian to his first outpatient therapy session. He’d settled on a Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday schedule for his therapies. The sessions would last an hour each and, since it took fifteen minutes to get there, it didn’t make much sense for Aaron to go home, so he started on his homework while waiting for Brian to finish. Unbeknownst to the boys, however, the first time would last much longer, since both the physical and occupational therapists needed to do full evaluations, each one requiring nearly an hour. When Aaron finished with his homework and Brian still hadn’t finished, he went to the reception desk to find out what was taking so long. The receptionist was clueless, but told him he could go into the therapy area and see for himself.

Aaron quickly spotted Brian, who was using a weight machine. He couldn’t help but stare at his boyfriend’s bulging biceps as he exercised - it gave him an instant hard-on. God Brian was so sexy! Taking care to keep his bulge from being too obvious, Aaron approached Brian and the young man who was working with him. When Aaron came into view, Brian’s whole face lit up.

“Hey, sexy!” Brian said as he greeted his lover.

“You’re the sexy one.”

“Aaron, this is Tim. He’s my physical therapist. Tim, this is Aaron.”

“Hi Aaron,” Tim said as he reached out and shook Aaron’s hand. “Brian’s been talking about you non-stop since we started our session, and now I can certainly see why.” Aaron blushed as Tim seemed to look him up and down. Tim continued, “You two make a really cute couple. Like I told Brian, rehab is a family affair, so don’t hesitate to come back and participate in Brian’s rehab.”

“I just didn’t want to get in the way.”

“Believe me, I’ll tell you if you get in the way. Seriously, there’s a lot I need to teach you. From what Brian told me, you two are practically engaged, so you’ll probably be the one spending more time with him than anyone else.”

Blushing, Aaron replied, “Well it’ll still be a couple of years and then some before we can live out on our own together, but yeah, if I could marry him, I would right now.”

Brian looked up at Aaron, smiled and said, “Aaron, you never told me that before. That’s so sweet, and I’d marry you, too, in a millisecond.”

Aaron leaned down and kissed Brian on the lips.

“It’s so cool that you guys have that. I’m still looking for my soul mate, and I’m a good ten years older than you guys. Sure, I’ve met my share of cute guys along the way, but none I’d want to spend more than a few days with, let alone eternity.” Tim sighed and then continued, “I’m not sure I know what love is anymore, but you guys give me hope. Seeing the two of you together and the way your faces light up when you see each other. . . it’s just so amazing that you found each other at such a young age.”

“And nearly lost each other,” Aaron said reflectively. “I couldn’t imagine life without Brian, but thank God he’s OK. I know it sucks that this happened, but it could have been so much worse.”

“Sometimes I wish I hadn’t survived,” Brian admitted, “but the thought of what that would have done to Aaron quickly drives those thoughts away. Why he’d still want me is something I’ll never understand, but I love him more than life itself.”

“Brian, in case you didn’t know it, you are hot,” Tim said, “and you’re kind and sensitive. Why wouldn’t Aaron still want you? Just because you’re in this wheelchair doesn’t mean you’re not the same Brian you were before. Believe me, I’ve had my share of quick fucks. It’s a lot of fun, but it’s not making love. What you two have is something special. Don’t sell yourself short. You’re really quite a catch and I have a feeling, Aaron knows it!”

“Damn straight . . . er, or maybe damn gay!” Aaron said as they all broke into laughter. “I love you, Brian, and I’m not letting you go.”

Tim interrupted, “Well, our time’s running out, and I still have more testing to do before I can let you go today, so maybe we should get back to work.”

Tim proceeded to evaluate Brian’s muscle function and his endurance, and to test his ability to use his wheelchair and even how to recover from falling out of it.

“Brian, you’re doing great!” Tim complemented him when he was finished. “You’re well ahead of the game and you make my job easy! I’ll see you guys next week!”

Aaron and Brian said their goodbyes and headed home. As Aaron drove, he couldn’t help but marvel at how cool it was to be driving his own car. His own car, but then he remembered how he got it and he felt a bit diminished by it; how he’d gladly give it all up if only Brian could walk! However, there was no use thinking of what might have been - the main thing was that they were both alive and had each other. Yes, he truly was lucky - damn lucky - even now.

Aaron dropped Brian off at his home and after a prolonged make-out session, headed home to his own house. His parents had made it clear that they expected him to spend most of his school nights in his own bed. Aaron knew that his parents were unusually accepting, but they were still his parents and they weren’t quite ready to let him go. In a way, it felt good to be loved, but he really wanted to be with Brian more than anything.

The next morning, much to the chagrin of his parents, Aaron got up an hour early and after getting himself ready, went over to Brian’s so he could help him get ready for school and have time to meet with Mr. Sampson before class.

Unfortunately, Mr. Sampson didn’t have much to say except that neither Aaron nor Brian should stoop to the level of his tormentors, and to always feel proud of who they were. He talked about making their enemies into their friends, but in parting, he told the boys something that would profoundly influence them for the rest of their lives.

“You have to realize, boys, that those kids sit in the back of the class for a reason. Brian, you used to sit in front because you have confidence in yourself. Sure, you’re smart, but you also feel comfortable in the classroom and like to participate. You don’t worry about the teacher calling on you and you even volunteer. You’re always on top of your lessons.

“The kids in the back aren’t necessarily any less intelligent that you are. Their real shortcoming is that they have low self-esteem. Their bravado is nothing more than an act. Some of them may be popular and some of them are jocks, but down deep, they know that they’ll never amount to anything.

“How many major league pro ballplayers do you think have graduated from this school? Either of you care to guess?”

“I dunno,” Brian answered. “Maybe three or four.”

“It’s probably not quite that many,” Aaron added. “I’d say maybe one or two.”

“The correct answer is none. Not one of our former students has gone on to make a career in professional sports. A few of our best players get athletic scholarships every year, but at least, until now, their sports careers have ended in college or in the minor leagues. The bottom line is that the kids who have picked on you, don’t really expect to go far in life. With such a poor self-image, they expect very little of themselves. So why study when you won’t get good grades anyway? It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.

“I know it’s not a perfect solution, boys, but the best thing you can do is to treat them with respect. Let their snide remarks drop and don’t make an issue out of you being gay. Engage them in their studies. Make them feel like more a part of the class. Help them to gain an appreciation for what they do know, and make them want to learn more”

“Thanks, Mr. Sampson. You’ve given me some real food for thought.”

Brian had an opportunity to put this advice to test right away in his first period class. As he entered the classroom and took his ‘seat’ at the table in the back, a kid next to him greeted him.

“Hey fag. Have fun with your lover boy last night? Is his cock tasty?”

Rather than get angry, Brian simply said, “Nah. Aaron had to spend the night with his folks, but with the weekend coming up, I’m sure I’ll be getting plenty. So how about you? Got any big plans for the weekend?” He was about to add, ‘Is your girl’s cunt real tasty?,’ but decided against it. Before the other boy could answer, he added, “By the way, in case you didn’t already know, my name’s Brian.”

The kid seemed taken aback and all he could do was utter, “Um. . . my name’s Chad.”

“So, Chad, what do you think of Mrs. Watson?”

“I think the bitch has real poker up her ass.”

Brian flinched at hearing that about one of his favorite teachers, but went on, “Why do you think that?”

“Well, I dunno. She just seems so aloof. You know? She only calls on me when she knows I don’t know the answer, and when I do, she calls on someone else and praises them to the hilt. She really likes people like you, but she hates me. I just know it.”

“I don’t think she hates anyone, Chad. Maybe you’re right about her paying more attention to the smarter kids, but maybe you need to give her more of a chance. You know, she really came through for me when I was injured. She came to see me at the hospital almost every day and even kept me informed on things going on at school . . . and she was great about me and Aaron. Without her help, I don’t know how we’d have gotten by. I mean my parents learned about us from the accident and they were very un-cool about the whole thing . . . even worse than you,” Brian said with a bit of a sly smile. “She helped us keep in touch, even when my parents wouldn’t let us see each other.”

Soon the bell rang and Mrs. Watson began going over the previous night’s reading assignment. When she asked a question, Brian leaned over and told Chad the answer and gave him a brief explanation. With a nudge from Brian, Chad raised his hand and, sure enough, Mrs. Watson called on him. Predictably, she asked him to expand on his answer and he surprised even himself by saying a little more than Brian had told him. She was impressed by his response and didn’t hesitate to tell him so, although she suspected that Brian had helped him out, but she realized, if Brian could interest Chad in learning, more power to him. The effect on Chad’s psyche was immeasurable.

“Way to go, Chad. I wasn’t sure if you’d even read the assignment.”

“Well, I didn’t, but I read a lotta other stuff for fun and somehow it came to me all of a sudden. I didn’t think I knew it, but you kinda jogged my memory.”

“You must be pretty smart.”

“You kiddin’ me? Everyone’s always tellin’ me how dumb I am. My old man tells me I’ll never amount to nothing.”

Mrs. Watson spoke up, “Chad, Brian, could you save it until later?”

The boys were quiet the rest of the class until the bell rang. They walked and wheeled down the hall together to their next class, which they also shared. Brian broke the ice by saying, “Chad, the way you answered that question . . . you’re not at all dumb. The way you pulled that together without even reading the assignment . . . you’d have to be pretty smart to do that.”

“Nah, just lucky . . . and besides,” he lowered his voice, “I wouldn’t want to spoil my reputation.”

“Now that’s just plain dumb.”

“See, what’d I tell ya?”

“Seriously, Chad, you don’t have to act dumb to be cool. Look at me. I’m in a wheelchair, I’m gay, and I still have a lot of close friends.”

“Yeah, but you’re a braniac. I’m not like that. I’m good at sports, but I’m not a jock, so what else is there? I’m not smart enough for the geek crowd, and I’m not a stoner. My parents’d throw me out of the house if I were a goth, so what’s left? The only way I fit in is as a slacker.”

“I hear what you’re saying, but I think you’re smarter than you give yourself credit for. Maybe not enough to be a geek, but I’m not exactly a geek either. OK, my boyfriend is, but you don’t exactly see either of us hanging around with the geek crowd. Chad, everyone here is an individual. Your friends are your friends no matter what. Just be yourself. Someday you’ll finish high school and maybe go to college. Making something of your life may not sound cool, but it’s what counts in the end, and it doesn’t mean you can’t still be a cool guy.”

As they entered their next classroom, another kid shouted, “Hey Chad, what are you doin’ talking to the faggot.”

“Stop bein’ a jerk, Carl. Brian’s actually pretty cool.”

“Ya turnin’ queer on me?”

“Fuck you, Carl.”

“But don’t it freak you out that he’s queerin’ on ya?”

“Lay off, Carl.”

“Yeah, Carl,” Brian added, “no offense, but I’m not interested in either of you. Seriously, I have a steady boyfriend and, frankly, neither of you are my type. Just because I’m gay doesn’t mean I’m gonna jump every boy in sight, but I’d be willin’ to bet you that I’m getting more sex than the both of you together. More important, I love Aaron. I’m not about to ‘queer’ on anyone else.”

“Well it still ain’t right. It ain’t natural.”

“I’m not going to argue with you, Carl, but I didn’t choose to be this way. In some ways it’s easier to be a paraplegic . . . at least people accept that I had no choice about it. But I really had no choice about being gay, either. When you walk down the hallway, you see tits. I see broad shoulders and tight asses. I can’t help it . . . it’s what I am, but it’s not who I am. Who I am is a kid who’s really into music and who plays in the band, and that has nothing to do with me being gay.”

Just then the bell rang and they took their ‘seats’. The rest of the morning went by without incident and Brian headed to lunch, ready to meet up with Aaron and their friends. After the three of them were seated, Chad approached their table and asked if he could sit with them.

“Sure thing, Chad,” Brian said, “you’re more than welcome to sit with us. By the way, this is my best friend, Larry, and I think you know who Aaron is. We also have Scott, Jared, Sharon and Jackie. Guys, this is Chad. He’s in a few of my classes.” After they completed their introductions, Brian continued, “So, Chad, what brings you to sit with us today?” He lowered his voice and said, “Even if you’re cool with me, I thought you wouldn’t want to hurt your reputation.”

“Well, you gave me a lot to think about this morning, and like you said, I think I can still be cool and be friends with ya. Besides, if I’m gonna get anywhere in life, it ain’t gonna be by slackin’. But the real reason I wanted to talk to you is because you said you’re really into music. I’m passionate about music myself. It’s just about the only thing that really interests me besides girls. So I’m curious about what types of music you like and what instruments you play.”

“Well, I like just about everything . . . well, everything but rap and its derivatives. I like classical music in all forms, and classic rock, some metal, a lot of alternative stuff like Coldplay and Ben Folds, but my favorite music is jazz, especially the mellow stuff. My idols are Miles Davis, even if he was a real bastard, and Winton Marsalis. That’s why I took up playing the trumpet. I really like a lot of the old and new jazz greats. When it comes to the newer stuff, I absolutely love Norman Brown and Mark Antoine. They’re incredible guitar players. What instruments? Well besides the trumpet, I also play both alto and tenor sax, the piano, and I used to play guitar.”

“Wow! You really are into music. I do like rap. I guess that comes with the image I’m trying to portray, and of course I like grunge, but like you, I absolutely love jazz. John Coltrane is my absolute all-time favorite, but I like all the guys you mentioned, too. And no one sings like Ella Fitzgerald used to. I even like Sinatra, but don’t tell anyone else that. In terms of what I play, I grew up with piano lessons, but my dad put an end to it when I was eleven. He said playing piano is for pussies. After that I took up guitar and now I play bass guitar.”

“That’s really cool, Chad,” Aaron chimed in. “I’m in awe of the both of you. When I was in third grade, I started playing the viola. I thought the violin was for sissies and the cello and bass were too big for me, so I thought the viola would be cool. But I didn’t stick with it and I dropped it when I finished fifth grade. Brian and I like the same kinds of music. At least I did learn how to read music, so maybe some day I’ll get back into playing an instrument . . . not like you guys, but if I ever could learn to play something more practical than the viola, it could be fun to jam.”

“Well it may be for pussies, but even though I’m one of the straight guys at this table,” Larry began, “I still play piano. I have a Yamaha keyboard and playing it can be as macho as anything else. Yeah, jammin’d be cool.”

The boys chatted excitedly about music and were stunned when the bell seemed to ring so soon. Other than a few more snide comments in class, which Brian simply ignored, the rest of the afternoon was uneventful. After their last class, Aaron and Brian headed to the music room for band practice.

They got there a little early and Brian got out his trumpet and started to warm up, but when he blew into the trumpet, the sound that came out was short-lived and flat. Try as he did, he couldn’t get more than short bursts of sound to come out of it.

In fact, the harder he tried, the more light-headed he felt until he finally passed out.


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22. All That Jazz

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 22 - All That Jazz

Brian felt so embarrassed - he actually passed out during band practice. He passed out, for Christ sake! Although he came to right away, Mr. Jeffries insisted that he go to the hospital - by ambulance, no less.

While Aaron accompanied Brian to the hospital in the ambulance, the school administration office phoned Alan Sandler at work, explaining the situation to him. Not long after Brian and Aaron were settled in an Emergency room cubicle, June and Alan Sandler joined them. It was discomforting to watch Brian laying on a gurney for hours while his wheelchair remained back at the school, locked up for the weekend.

While he waited in Emergency with his parents and Aaron, Brian had an accident - his bowels evacuated while he lay there - a consequence of his attempt to switch to an evening bowel program. Brian was mortified as the odor permeated the area.

Within a minute, a male nurse and then a patient care assistant, better known to the lay public as an orderly, came to the rescue, assessed the situation, and proceeded to remedy it. After ushering the Sandlers and Aaron from the cubicle, they removed Aaron’s lower garments, washed his backside, got him into a hospital gown and much to Brian’s horror, put him in a diaper.

While this was happening, Aaron took the opportunity to call his parents. Aaron was glad that it was his dad who answered. “Hi Dad, I’m in Emergency with Brian and Mr. and Mrs. Sandler. Brian fainted at band practice this afternoon when he tried to play the trumpet. We’ve been here for more than hour, waiting for someone to see him.”

Jim Johnson recognized the anxiety in Aaron’s voice. “Aaron, is he in any distress right now?”

Aaron told his dad what had just happened with the unexpected bowel movement and ended by saying, “He seems fine dad, but I know he’s feeling a lot more stressed than he’s letting on.” Aaron’s voice cracked.

“Aaron, that’s to be expected, especially in the ER. You can imagine how your mother and I felt when you were in there the night of the accident, and I can just imagine how Alan and June are feeling right now, but it’s far worse for Brian. What you say and how you act with him can make a huge difference in how he feels. If you sound and act stressed out, it will only amplify the way Brian feels. On the other hand, if you seem to be relaxed and provide words of encouragement, it will help to alleviate Brian’s stress.

“More than anything, Brian feels embarrassed by the whole thing. I’m no doctor, but I’m sure Brian’s passing out probably had nothing to do with anything serious. It’s embarrassing to faint during band practice. Pooping in his pants was even more embarrassing. We both know there’s absolutely nothing Brian could have done about either thing. It wasn’t his fault. Just tell him that and give him reassurance and your love and he’ll feel a lot better.”

“Thanks Dad, I guess that’s just what I needed to hear.” Aaron replied, now with control in his voice.

“Aaron, you’ve accepted a huge challenge together with Brian and I’m sure you’re going to succeed. Give June, Alan, and Brian our love.”

“I will dad, and thanks. I better get back there and give them something to smile about.”

“That’s my boy! You know your mom and I are very proud of you. Goodbye son.”

As Aaron retuned to Brian’s cubicle, he noticed quite a bit of activity in some of the other cubicles and, although the curtains were drawn, he could only imagine the stress that the other families in the ER were feeling that evening. As he approached Brian’s cubicle, he smiled and peered in with a mischievous grin, giving June, Alan, and Brian a wide-eyed, happy stare.

“Sooo, how... is.... it... going? He smiled as he looked at each of them. The response was a spontaneous smile from the three of them.

“Well,” Brian said with a smile as he pointed to his groin area, “Thank God I wasn’t in school when this happened, but where‘d you go?”

“I guess I could say a lot of stupid things about going to the bathroom,” Aaron said with a grin, “but no, I just phoned my folks to let them know what was up. They send their love to for each of you.”

“Thank you Aaron,” Alan said, “Listen Brian, you seem to be pretty stable at the moment, and you’re going to need some fresh clothes when they send you home. So, I’m going to make a mad dash home and pick some up for you. In the meantime, Aaron, starting at the nurses’ station, why don’t you check around and see what we can do about getting a loan of a wheelchair ’til we get Brian’s back from school.”

“Oh shit!” Both boys said together. “I forgot all about it in the confusion.” Aaron added.

Within an hour, spent bouncing from one area to another, Aaron returned to Brian’s cubicle with nothing more than a list of agencies that collected wheelchairs from people who no longer needed them. Alan had already returned with clean clothes for Brian.

“I’m sorry, guys. I ended up going all over the place, only to be told the same thing over and over again. The hospital doesn’t loan wheel chairs to anyone for any reason. The on-duty social worker told me they used to a long time ago, but too many people never returned them. She’s the one who gave me this list. It looks like we’re going to have to get by without one tonight and maybe see if we can get one from one of these agencies in the morning.”

“That’s OK, Aaron. You did the best you could,” Brian’s father said as he gently squeezed Aaron’s shoulder.

Just then, Dr. Langston entered the cubicle, reading Brian’s file.

“Aaron! Good to see you. Looking much better than the last time you were here. . . . and you must be Brian. Good to meet you at last.” Dr. Langston greeted the patient with a steady handshake. “I’m sorry for the wait folks, but this place is swamped tonight and we’re down one resident.”

Aaron smiled feeling a new level of comfort knowing that Chip was going to examine Brian. “I’m surprised you remember me. You must see hundreds of patients every week here.”

“I sure do, Aaron, but you’re different. It’s not every day I meet a young teenager who’s so self-assured as you are. There’s more to it than that, though. I don’t generally discuss my personal life, but we three share something in common.”

“You mean you’re gay?”

“Yup. The way you cared so deeply for Brian just blew me away that night.” Chip turned nervously toward Brian’s parents, remembering some of what Aaron had said that night. “You must be Brian’s parents.”

Seeing the look of concern on Chip’s face, Alan took Chip’s hand and shook it firmly as he said, “Dr. Langston, I want you to know that my wife and I are proud of our two sons.” He nodded in Brian and Aaron’s direction. “I’ve learned a lot from them since the accident, and have come to accept that what they feel for each other is no different from what I feel for my wife. June and I couldn’t be happier that they’re together now. You’re among friends here.”

A broad grin lit up Chip’s entire face as he returned Alan’s handshake. Turning to the chart, he said, “Says here you fainted while you were playing the trumpet.” Brian nodded as the doctor took his blood pressure with him lying flat on his back. “Brian, I want you to sit up and rest your weight on your extended arms behind you.” As Brian complied, Chip put his stethoscope into his ears and listened to Brian’s chest. “OK, now lean forward against me while I recheck your blood pressure.” Chip then told Brian four times to take a deep breath, hold and exhale while he listened to his heart and lungs. After the fourth breath, he asked Brian, “After taking those deep breaths, how do you feel?”

“A little bit dizzy; light headed.” Brian replied.

“OK,” Chip said as he took Brian’s blood pressure yet again. “Now lie back down while I take your blood pressure one final time.” Once completed, Chip smiled, “Now Brian, with just that bit of exertion and those deep breaths, your blood pressure did drop a little in both the sitting and supine . . . oops, I mean lying down positions. Your sitting blood pressure is low to begin with, which isn’t at all unexpected in a paraplegic, so it doesn’t take much of a drop to make you faint. When you tried playing the trumpet this afternoon, I’m sure you just had a vago-vagal response; in layman’s terms you overexerted yourself to the point where the blood couldn’t get enough oxygen to the brain. I’d love to stay and chat, but like I said, we’re swamped. Go on home Brian, you’ll be fine.”

All that time, this whole ordeal; just to be told that he over exerted himself trying to play his trumpet. Brian sighed in disgust as he slowly shook his head.

The hospital provided a wheelchair to get Brian from the ER to the Sandler’s car, but after that, he would be on his own. They first drove to the school so Aaron could pick up his car. As Alan drove, Brian nodded off in the front seat. June took Aaron’s hand in hers. Her words were quiet, simple, and full of emotion. “Thank you Aaron.”

Aaron reflected back on the phone call to his dad and smiled. “My dad deserves most of the credit.”

The Sandlers waited at the school parking lot, while Aaron checked a few of the doors of the school. He wanted to see if anyone - a janitor or security person could let him in to retrieve Brian’s chair. The school was deserted, but he did find a notice at the front door that told him who to call in an emergency.

When they got home, it was Brian who thought of using his commode chair to transfer out of the car. It wasn’t a perfect solution by any means, but it beat the hell out of being physically carried. Still, Brian was mortified by the thought that a neighbor might see it, since it looked a bit like a toilet on wheels, but Aaron couldn’t help but laugh hysterically at the whole thing.

“I almost forgot about the commode chair,” Aaron said to his lover, once he had calmed down. “It may not look like much, but I guess it’ll do.”

“Well I’m certainly not going out in public with it. Seriously, though, my therapists told me that I should never sit on it for more than an hour at a time, or I could get pressure sores. It’s not designed to be used as a regular wheelchair and the cushion isn’t soft enough to protect my skin. So I guess I’ll be stuck in bed or on the sofa for the rest of the weekend.”

“That really sucks.”

They couldn’t get the commode chair as close to the car as a regular wheelchair, either, so Aaron and Alan had to help Brian bridge the gap. Aaron winced as they did so - his broken ribs were nearly healed, but they still hurt with sudden, jerking motions. Once inside the house, Brian was able to tend to his own needs for the most part, getting a little help from his boyfriend to remove the diaper he’d gotten in Emergency.

The worst of the day’s events, however, was when he spoke to Dr. Stevens, his physician back at the Rehab Center, later that night. Brian had called and left a message from the ER, and was surprised when Dr. Stevens called back so quickly. Dr. Stevens explained that with the loss of control over his abdominal muscles and half of his intercostals - the so-called secondary breathing muscles, he just didn’t have the expiratory force needed to play a wind instrument. He’d probably never be able to play the trumpet again, and playing the saxophone would be even more difficult, if not impossible.

Brian was devastated and cried himself to sleep in Aaron’s arms.

The last insult to an emotionally injurious day came when Aaron awoke during the night to find that Brian had again soiled himself.

“Fuck, Aaron, it’s never gonna work. I’m gonna hafta wear diapers.”

“Don’t worry about it, sweetheart. We’ll eventually get it right. I’ve been reading up on this shit - oops,” Aaron giggled realizing what he’d said, “and I think we made a mistake in thinking that the accident in the emergency room was the end of it. We should have probably gone ahead with a bowel program anyway last night. In fact, I think we probably should do a program right now, just in case. That should tide you over until Sunday night.”

“You want to give me a suppository now at, what . . .” Brian said looking at his alarm clock, “. . . three AM?”

“Better now than to have another accident over the weekend, don’tcha think? And besides, we can sleep in.”

“I guess.”

In less than an hour, the boys were back in bed, between fresh sheets, nestled in each other’s arms, asleep again.

Aaron didn’t awake again until ten - he’d obviously slept through Brian’s cathing himself at seven. Aaron quietly got out of bed and took his clothes with him into the bathroom. After a quick shower, some cereal and a few phone calls, he was on his way to school to pick up Brian’s wheelchair from security. Thank God, he thought - without it, Brian could have been a prisoner for the rest of the weekend, and would have had a Hell of a time getting to his therapy sessions. Aaron doubted that any of the agencies on the list the ER social worker gave him would be open for the weekend.

He returned to find the entire Sandler family enjoying pancakes for brunch.

“I’m back!” Aaron called from the vestibule as he quietly pushed the wheelchair. “Gotta a surprise for ya, sweetheart,” he added as he pushed the wheelchair into the dining room smiling.

“My legs! My legs!” Brian shouted from the table. All four laughed over Brian’s enthusiasm. It became a spirited beginning after the previous day’s less than enjoyable events.

Although he’d already eaten, Aaron had little difficulty finding enough room to enjoy a couple of pancakes with Brian and his parents.

After breakfast, the boys returned to Brian’s room and Brian got out his tenor sax. He started playing around and fingering the sax while trying to muster enough breath to play. He actually did manage to squawk out some notes, but nothing long enough to actually play a song and he found it exhausting.

“Maybe with some exercises and practice, you’ll be able to play it,” Aaron suggested.

“Nah, I’ll never have the stamina to play it well, but I’m not gonna give up on music. It’s my life, well, next to you.”

“How about piano?”

“Yeah, but how would I manage the foot pedals.”

“Hmm. What if you used an electronic keyboard and hooked the pedals up to a head control, or something like that?”

“That might work,” Brian thought aloud.

“How about at least trying out your piano right now?”

“Sure, why not?”

They headed back out into the great room and Aaron moved the piano bench out of the way so that Brian could sit in front of his family’s baby grand. Brian started out playing some simple tunes from memory and although it sounded stilted from the lack of pedal action, it sounded pretty good. The only problem he found was when he tried to reach the keys at both the high and low ends - he would tend to lean over and at one point nearly lost his balance.

Brian was a little discouraged by that, but Aaron reassured him. “You don’t even use those keys most of the time except for classical music. Some keyboards don’t even include the low end at all.”

“Yeah, you’re right. I’m sure I could play jazz and rock OK.”

“Hell yeah.” Aaron agreed.

Aaron thought for a moment and then asked, “Do you still have your guitar?”

“Yeah, but it’s a real cheap one and I haven’t played it in an age.”

“Seeing as two of your favorite artists are Norman Brown and Marc Antoine, do you think maybe you’d like to take it up again?”

Brian pondered this and a smile slowly spread across his face. “You have a good point there, Aaron, and you know how much I like your points . . . the one’s on your chest and the large one down below,” he added with a blush. “But seriously, so what if I can’t be the next Winton Marsalis? There’s nothing wrong with being the next Marc Antoine. I think my guitar’s up in the attic. Let’s see if Dad’ll get it out for me.”

Later in the afternoon, after getting back from Brian's Saturday therapy sessions, the boys found themselves in Brian’s room, Brian seated in his wheelchair with his freshly tuned guitar in hand. After a lot of messing around, he started playing in earnest.

“Brian, you’re really good! Why’d you ever stop playing?”

“There are no guitars in either the school orchestra or the school band, and I particularly wanted to play in the band. The trumpet just seemed like a cool instrument to play in the band, and I already admired Miles Davis since my folks are really into jazz. Afterwards, I got into the sax as my appreciation of jazz grew. I guess I lost interest in guitar as I developed my skills with wind instruments.”

“But your playing is fantastic, even after all these years.”

“You can really tell, even with this crappy guitar that needs new strings?”

“I may be biased, but I recognize talent when I hear it. You have talent, Brian. I think you could probably play almost any instrument you set your sights on.”

“Aaron, you said at school yesterday that you used to play viola. Do you still have your viola?”

“Brian, the last thing you want to do is hear me play viola! And, no, I don’t have it any more. We rented one during my brief stint as a musician.”

“But you said you can still read music.”

“Yeah, that’s easy . . . it’s the sort of thing you never forget.”

“I know what you mean.” Brian looked at his love with a sly expression and continued, “How would you like to try playing my saxophones? I mean, they’re not easy to play, but a lot easier than learning to play the trumpet, and if you can read music and all . . . I mean . . . what I’m trying to say is it’d be cool to be able to play music together, maybe with some of the guys. Larry could play keyboards, Chad would play bass guitar, I’d play the acoustic and you could play sax.”

The last thing Aaron thought he could do was to be a musician, but he did love music and if it would make Brian happy, he thought, it just might be fun. They could play music together during the day and make another kind of music together by night.

Then Aaron had another thought. “Brian, we both like jazz, and Chad likes jazz, and I guess Larry likes jazz, and I’m sure a lot of other kids at school like jazz. Maybe you could start a jazz ensemble at school.”

Brian thought about it as a wide grin took over his face. “That’d be so cool. Yeah, I really like that. Since I can’t be in the band anymore, why not a jazz ensemble? The school doesn’t have one, so why can’t we start one? Aaron, you’re a genius!”

Aaron couldn’t have been happier with Brian’s reaction. He’d gone from being upset and depressed to being truly excited about something. The transformation was magical.

They spent the rest of the day together messing around with Brian’s guitar and saxophones. It took Aaron a lot of practice, but Brian was patient and by the end of the weekend, Aaron could actually manage to maintain a steady sound and play a few simple tunes.

The next day at school, everyone got together at lunch to discuss Aaron’s idea for a jazz ensemble. Chad in particular was psyched. “Man, that would be amazing. Our own jazz band!”

“I hate to brag, but I’m a mean drummer,” Scott threw in. “I’m not as fond of jazz as Rock and Roll, but I’ve never been in a band before and I think it’d be great.”

“You know you can count me in on keyboards,” Larry added.

“You guys have got to hear Jackie sing!” Sharon chimed in and her girlfriend visibly blushed.

“I’m not that good.”

“The hell you’re not,” Sharon reiterated. “Honey, you have the voice of an angel, and the power of the devil in your vocal cords.”

Aaron quietly whispered in Sharon’s ear, “Are you guys, like, out now?”

“Of course we’re out,” Sharon said loud enough for everyone at the table to hear. “After our little mishap back in February and after my parents actually accepted me for who I am, Jackie and I figured that we might as well be out among our friends, too.

“Sharon, how was it that your parents were so cool about you and Jackie when Brian’s were such pricks back then?” Aaron blushed when he realized what he’d said and quickly turned to his boyfriend and added, “Brian, I didn’t mean to call your parents pricks . . .”

“That’s OK, babe. My parents were pricks back then. They couldn’t be better, now, but they nearly destroyed us. You have nothing to apologize for. Anyway, Sharon, how was it that your parents were OK with it from the start? They’re as religious as my parents are.”

“Well, believe it or not, the Bible’s actually rather circumspect when it comes to lesbians. Apparently, we’re not the ‘abomination’ you guys are. Ironically, it’s thanks to women’s libration that the Christian Right takes as dim a view of lesbians as of gays, but the bottom line is that my parents never did believe all the crap the preachers spew against homosexuality. They were raised religious, but they accept that not everything in the Bible could be God’s word. Unlike a good many Christians, they actually read the Bible and know what’s in it . . . all of what’s in it. They long ago concluded that God’s word in the Bible was embellished by humankind over the millennia to suit their needs at the time, particularly when it came to such things as slavery and homosexuality.”

“That’s really cool, Sharon. It’s too bad it took what happened to me to get my parents to open their eyes. Well, that and . . . something I’d better not mention,” Brian said.

“So how do we go about forming a jazz band?” Aaron asked, returning to the subject at hand.

“Why don’t I approach Mr. Jeffreys about it?” Brian suggested. “If anyone would know what to do, it would be the music director of the school, and he already knows me from band.”

“Sounds good to me,” Chad said. “Whatdaya say we get together later this week to jam.”

“Yah,” Larry added, “we might as well get started.”

“But I’m not near ready to play with you guys,” Aaron expressed with concern.

“Don’t worry about it,” Chad said. “And besides, aren’t you gay guys supposed to be musically talented?”

“I don’t think we’re any more musically talented than anyone else,” Brian said in Aaron’s defense, “but it really doesn’t matter. We’re just gonna fool around anyway. Jammin’s really the best way for you to learn how to play. Don’t worry about it, sweetheart . . . you’ll do fine.”

Aaron blushed at hearing Brian’s term of endearment in public and Chad teased him about it, but everyone knew it was in fun. They all agreed to get together on Friday after school at Chad’s house, since his parents were going to be out for the evening.

Brian met with Mr. Jeffreys later in the day and he agreed to help set up the jazz ensemble if enough students expressed an interest. He agreed to tell all his students about it and promised to ask the other music teachers to do the same.

He also told Brian how to formally apply to establish a new school club and how to post notice of it so that they could attract members. Setting it up as a club would have to suffice for the time, since there was no budget in the current school year for a formal school jazz ensemble.

By the time Friday rolled around, the group had a total of fifteen members, and that was without even posting notice. Aaron felt very self-conscious during their first jam session and although he wasn’t nearly ready for prime time, he was able to carry a tune and to an extent, play along with the others. Fortunately his skills and comfort level improved substantially in the coming weeks and by the end of the school year, he was adept at playing both of Brian’s saxophones. Although not yet able to ad lib, he did quite well playing with the band and even playing an occasional solo.

In the meantime, armed with fifteen signatures, Brian was able to formally petition the school to form a club and to post notice of it on school bulletin boards and in the school paper. Mr. Jeffreys delivered on his promise, providing musical direction, space for the band to practice after school and a place to lock up their instruments during the day. The ensemble ended the year with 23 members and a variety of instruments ranging from flute to bass.

True to Sharon’s word, Jackie indeed had an amazing voice that combined a velvety smoothness with a trace of a hard edge and a startling range. With their combined talents, the jazz ensemble could play almost any variety of jazz. They were hired to play at both the junior and senior proms and played at a year-end assembly. They even managed to attract attention outside of school and were hired for a few weddings and Bar Mitzvahs.

It was ironic that all of this happened because Brian could no longer play the trumpet.

The usual end of school year activities found Aaron and Brian to be very busy. Before this, however, there was a major peace rally planned by Students for Peace over the Easter weekend. Both boys were on the planning committee, but for Aaron, the idea of going into 25 classrooms to make a pitch for the rally had him petrified. He spent hours, locked in his room, practicing his speech. His memory of Brian’s pitch a half-year earlier gave him the courage he needed.

The first classroom he entered was a freshman math class, which meant that he needed to make his pitch quickly, so as not to interfere with the lesson. It also meant he knew almost no one in the class. The one exception was Larry, and seeing him put Aaron at ease.

Aaron handed the teacher a note, much as he remembered seeing Brian do, and then he introduced himself to the class. “Hi, my name’s Aaron Johnson, and I’m here on behalf of a group called Students for Peace. . . .”

At the end of his speech, he asked for volunteers and Larry raised his hand.

“You can’t volunteer, Larry, you’re already on the committee.” Aaron said to much laughter. After things settled down, Aaron managed to get two legitimate volunteers from the class.

Aaron’s self-confidence increased steadily as he went from classroom to classroom, making his pitch. That was until his call for volunteers in one classroom was met with, “I ain’t gonna go marchin’ with no faggots,” from one of the students.

The teacher, however, reacted quickly and swiftly. “Jeremy Fisher, you just earned yourself a week of detention.”

“But everyone knows that Johnson’s a queer. He and his gimp boyfriend, Sandler.”

“Come here, Jeremy,” the teacher ordered as she wrote out a hall pass and a quick note to the vice-principal. “I think you’re going to be doing a lot more than detention after that remark.” She turned to the rest of the class and added, “I want to make it clear that this school does not tolerate physical or verbal abuse of any student based on race, religion, ethnic origin or sexual orientation.”

Aaron thanked the teacher for her remarks and then faced the class to add, “For those of you who didn’t know, I am indeed gay, and my boyfriend is a paraplegic . . . I think most of you know or know of Brian Sandler, ’cause there aren’t all that many kids in wheelchairs around here. Students for Peace is all about accepting diversity. We can’t expect peace with other countries if we don’t have peace here at home.

“Now just to clarify, Students for Peace is not a gay organization. We do have some gay and lesbian members, but no more than you would expect for an organization of its size. The school does have a gay straight alliance, however, and if any of you are interested in joining, I would be happy to speak to you confidentially after class. The vast majority of the GSA’s members are straight, by the way, but the organization provides a safe environment for kids who are gay, lesbian or unsure of their sexuality.”

Aaron was exhausted by the end of the day, but very pleased that he’d managed to sign up nearly forty volunteers for the rally. The day of the rally itself was clear and sunny. There was no candlelight vigil this time, so there were no candles to prepare, much to Aaron’s relief. Things went off without a hitch and both boys thoroughly enjoyed the day’s activities. Brian managed to propel his wheelchair over more than half of the parade route, asking Aaron to push him only after his arms could no longer function. The day was also nostalgic for Aaron and Brian, as they remembered the last Students for Peace rally they had attended.

That night, Aaron and Brian made passionate love to each other as they reveled in the joy they shared in having each other. They woke up in the early morning hours, however, to find the bed soaked. Aaron was very understanding, but Brian was horrified.

“I can’t believe I wet the bed!”

“It wasn’t your fault, Brian. Remember how Dr. Stevens said this might happen? Tomorrow, we’ll make an appointment to see your doctor, and make sure you don’t have a bladder infection. If we have to, we’ll see the urologist at the rehab center and get some medications to keep you dry.”

It took more than a week to get an appointment with the urologist, during which Brian had to suffer the humiliation of wearing diapers in school. Learning to change his own diaper was a challenge, but it became necessary as he experienced incontinence in class several times before he saw the urologist.

The urologist conducted a test in which he filled Brian’s bladder with water and measured internal pressures and the electrical activity of Brian’s sphincter. He then explained to Brian that he had a spastic bladder and would have to take medications to relax the bladder, which would help him keep continent. Brian chuckled when he found he would be using the same medication that he’d seen advertised on TV for women with overactive bladders.

In the meantime, the boys’ easy-going nature and ever-present willingness to help gained them a following of close friends, both gay and straight, in their respective grade levels. Neither one realized how popular they had become.

It came as a complete surprise to them when Aaron was nominated to serve on the student council for the coming academic year and an even greater surprise when Brian was nominated to be the incoming sophomore class president. Not only were they nominated, but they were flabbergasted when they both won their respective elections. Neither really considered themselves to be all that popular outside of their close circle of friends and didn’t realize that they had earned the respect of their peers for being proud and confident of who they were.


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

23. Fine Fifteen

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 23 - Fine Fifteen

Shortly after the end of the school year, Brian celebrated his fifteenth birthday with a party at his house. Sadly, Larry and Cindy had had a parting of the ways, but remained close friends and they both attended Brian’s party, Cindy with her new boyfriend, Steve, and Larry by himself. It was a bittersweet time for them, but such is the nature of adolescent love.

Adam and Jenny were there, as were Scott and Jared, who had become quite an item. Several of Brian’s new friends also came, some of whom were his former tormentors, most notably Chad, who was now one of his closest friends.

As a special surprise, unbeknownst to Brian, Aaron had invited Jamal, whom Brian had befriended at the Rehab Center, and his boyfriend, Corey. It was great to see Jamal again and both he and Corey were grateful to Brian for having helped to get them together.

“You can’t imagine how happy we are, Brian,” Jamal began. If it hadn’t been for you, I don’t know if I could have ever gotten the courage to approach Corey.”

“I know a little about things from your e-mails, but I’m still curious as to how things went when you tested the waters with him,” Brian asked.

Corry blushed deeply as Jamal answered. “Well, it wasn’t easy, with Corey being so shy and all. I did as you said and started talking to him about our algebra homework. Then I asked him if he had a girlfriend. He didn’t just avert his gaze . . . he blushed as deeply as he’s doin’ right now. I was pretty sure after that, but still a bit worried, so I asked him who he thought was hot. All he could do was stammer, so I decided to take a big risk. I told him that if he was gay, it was OK by me. He just about fell off his chair, and he started to cry. It was then that I knew that he was gay, and he was really having a hard time dealin’ with it, so I told him right then and there that I was gay, too, and that I thought he was really cute, and sexy. You shoulda seen the look on his face.

“I know you said you and Aaron fell head over heals in love at first sight, but it couldn’ta been any more than what happened to Corey and me. We’ve been inseparable ever since, just like you and Aaron. Now I’d already told my parents I was gay even before I left rehab. I just figured it would be easier then and there, while they were already dealing with me being a quad, than to discover it later, and I was right. They were pretty cool with it, but Corey was scared shitless to tell his parents. I wanted to tell them outright, but Corey wanted to keep it a secret. Then when I came to his house for a visit one day and without thinking, gave him a light pat on the behind, not realizing his mother was watching, she just smiled at us.”

“I still think you did that deliberately,” Corey countered.

“As much as I might have wanted to out you to your parents, I’m not a jerk. I swear it was an accident. Anyway, when his mom smiled at us, Corey got a look of sheer terror on his face.”

“I thought my whole life was going to come to an end, but then it struck me that my mom was actually smiling. She wasn’t mad at me; she seemed to be happy. So I just said, ‘Mom?’ And she just said ‘It’s OK’ and told me that she and my dad had suspected I was gay for years. They were apparently just waiting for me to tell them.”

“Corey’s parents have been wonderful. They’ve taken me under their wing as if I were one of their own. They were actually more concerned about me being a quad than that their son was gay or that I’m black.”

“Yeah, but they’re past that now,” Corey added. “Jamal has really warmed his way into their hearts. He’s a sweet person and his strength and determination more than make up for his being in a wheelchair. Besides, he has an incredibly huge cock.”

“And don’t you love to taste it, too.” Both boys were blushing furiously now. “And would you believe that this little guy can deep throat all of it?” Everyone was blushing after Jamal made that comment.

Everyone was even more startled when Corey added, “And that’s not the only cavity that can take all of it, either.”

“Whatever happened to my shy, innocent boyfriend?”

“I’m not so innocent any more, Jamal. I had a great teacher.”

The small group of boys gathered around couldn’t help but be amused by the exchange, and got pretty hard from it, too.

Brian got a lot of gifts from all of his friends, and Aaron got him a new watch, but the gift that really blew him away was the one he got from his parents. It was a new guitar, but Brian nearly fainted when he saw the label. “Mom, Dad, do you know how much this thing cost? . . . Well, obviously you do, ’cause you bought it, but gees! This thing’s worth a fortune!”

“We were fortunate to find it at an estate sale.” Alan Sandler explained. “We could never have afforded a new one. It only was only about a fifth the cost.”

“But that’s still well over a thousand dollars!”

“Closer to two thousand, but you’re worth it, Brian. You’re more than worth it.”

Brian wheeled over and gave both of his parents a hug.

The party was a blast and it was nearly one AM when the last guest left. Of course it went without saying that Aaron would be spending the night.

When they got to Brian’s room and shut the door, they locked their lips in a passionate kiss as they embraced.

“Happy birthday, my love,” Aaron said when they finally came up for air.

“Thanks, but it’s not my birthday any more.”

Aaron chuckled, “I guess you’re right. Well, in any case, how does it feel to be the most popular kid in the sophomore class?”

Brian was about to object to Aaron’s preposterous statement, but then he thought about it for a minute and realized that Aaron was right. He was the fucking class president. What a bizarre turn of events! He didn’t go out of his way to be popular and certainly wasn’t part of any ‘clique’, but he’d obviously become well liked by just about everyone, simply by being himself.

Finally, he tempered his victory by wondering aloud, “I just hope it’s not because everyone felt sorry for the kid in the wheelchair.”

“Hell no. You should know better than that. This wasn’t a pity vote. The wheelchair may have made you more visible, but the class elected you because they like you. You’re an exceptional boy, Brian Sandler, and I’m the luckiest guy in the world to have you for my boyfriend.”

Brian blushed and then kissed Aaron aggressively. When they finally broke their kiss, he said, “You’re wrong about that. I’m the lucky one. You’re one hell of a special guy yourself, and I think your classmates respect you, too. After all, they elected you to the student council. I wouldn’t be surprised if you become the first openly gay senior class president.”

“No fuckin’ way,” Aaron replied as they laughed at the preposterousness of it all.

“I have one more birthday present for you, my boy.”

“Mmmm . . .” was all Brian could muster.

“No, not that . . . well, of course that, but this is something else . . . something that will contribute to that.” With that Aaron lifted the hem of his shirt and stripped it off, showing Brian his chest.

Brian audibly gasped as he saw two small nipple rings. “When the hell did you do that, and how the fuck did you get your parents to agree to it? I thought we were gonna wait til we’re older.”

“Well, if you don’t like it, I suppose I could have them removed.”

“No, no. I love them. They’re so sexy on you . . . even more than the ear stud, but . . . your parents!”

“When I told them that you’d mentioned wanting me to have them and that I wanted them too, they reluctantly agreed. It took a few weeks of wearing them down, though.”

“Do you think my parents would let me get my nips pierced?”

Aaron thought for a moment and then answered, “Probably not . . . at least not yet. Maybe when you’re sixteen. Maybe not until you’re eighteen. I can wait for it, but in the meantime, enjoy mine!”

And enjoy them Brian did. He reached out and gave Aaron’s right nipple ring a light tug. Aaron couldn’t believe the pleasure. He thought that having his nips sucked was great, but the ring made his nips so much more sensitive. When Brian reached forward and licked around the left nipple ring, Aaron lost it.

His already hard dick swelled, his balls lifted and he shot spurt after spurt of cum into his pants. Brian saw what had happened, reached his hand into Aaron’s pants and boxers and pulled out a large wad of Aaron’s cum which he proceeded to lick off his fingers.

“Man, Aaron, you came just from me licking your nips. I’ve never seen you do that before.”

“I didn’t think it was possible, Brian. That was fucking amazing. Hope I can make it last a little longer next time, though.”

“Yeah, longer would be nice. Man, I hope I can talk my parents into nip rings sooner rather than later.”

“Well, let’s see how they react to mine.”

“You’re gonna tell them about it?

“I’ll do better than that. I often eat breakfast in just my boxers anyway, so tomorrow might just be the perfect time to give them a peek.”

“I think it’ll freak them out.”

“Maybe. But then again, maybe not. I mean, like, we kiss in front of them all the time and your mom even thinks it’s sweet. Let’s just see what happens.”

“Um, OK. But if they freak out and disown you, don’t come crying back to me. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

“And don’t you come back to me with your ‘I told you so.’


“Man, I gotta clean this mess up. I’ll be right back.” Aaron walked over to Brian’s new accessible bathroom. It had taken a while, but the workmen did a great job. It was spacious and included an accessible toilet with grab bars, an overhanging sink that Brian could wheel up to and a large open shower with a handheld showerhead. Aaron stripped off his clothes, threw his boxers in the sink, rinsed out the wet spot in his pants and hung them over one of the grab bars to dry, and used the handheld shower to quickly rinse off.

When he returned to the bedroom, Brian lay naked on his bed, sprawled out, looking utterly cute, and very, very sexy. As he approached, Brian sat up and told Aaron, “You know, I still need to do my bowel program before going to bed. I thought maybe we could try something new tonight. It’s my birthday . . . was my birthday . . . after all.”

“Honey, are you suggesting what I think you’re suggesting?”

“Well, we never did get to do it with you on top.”

Aaron’s dick rose to full attention as he thought about the opportunity to finally fuck the love of his life.

“Are you sure, Brian? I mean it may not work, you may get dysreflexic, and you won’t feel it.”

“The only way to find out is to try it, and I’ve been wanting to try it for a very long time. And if the sensations I get when you finger fuck me and suck me are any indication, I think I might like it a lot.”

“OK, then hop in your wheelchair and get that bowel program going!”

Brian did just that, transferring himself to his toilet and inserting a suppository. Aaron was well beyond the gross-out stage by now and the two boys chatted about their summer plans while waiting for Brian’s bowel program to complete.

“So did you ask your parents about getting a summer job?” Aaron asked.

“Unfortunately, the answer is no. They think I’m too young, and I suppose they’re right. I need to concentrate on my physical therapy and on adapting to life as a paraplegic. Besides, no one wants to hire a teenage paraplegic. Maybe if I were older. . . . and I’m not about to be a greeter at Wal-Mart.”

“I know you wanted a job, babe, but maybe it’s for the best. You’ll have driver’s ed anyway, so that kinda limits your hours, and next year you’ll be able to drive yourself. That’ll really open up your chances for a job next year. Hey, how about doing some math tutoring?” Aaron added as an afterthought.

“You know, that’s a real suggestion. I doubt that my folks would object to that. If the kids could come here, I wouldn’t need to worry about transportation or accessibility issues. And I really love to teach. I’ll check with the school to see if anyone asked about getting math tutoring over the summer.”

By now Brian’s bowel program was finished and he transferred to a shower chair and took a quick shower. Aaron then cathed him - an activity he still found to be a turn-on.

With Brian all clean and fresh, the boys moved back to the bed and lay next to each other, embracing tightly and kissing passionately. Brian started fingering Aaron’s nipple rings, nearly bringing him to his second orgasm of the night.

“Brian, please, not so fast. You’re gonna make me cum before I even get started with you.”

“Sorry, my love. You’re just so hot.”

“No problem. Just save playing with my nips until I’m inside of you.”

With that, Aaron tongued Brian’s right ear, then started kissing down his neck and licked, sucked and nipped each of Brian’s nipples while gently stroking his zone of injury. Brian gasped with pleasure. Aaron then moved down to Brian’s flaccid cock and took it into his mouth and began sucking it and tonguing its most sensitive underside. Seeing that Brian was getting close to ejaculating, he stopped and watched his dick become flaccid. Aaron then took Brian’s legs and placed his ankles over his own shoulders. Aaron now had full access to Brian’s beautiful, clean pucker. Aaron reached down and gently started rimming it. Although Brian couldn’t feel it, he could sense the stimulation.

One thing about being a para - there was much less rectal tone than before his injury and Aaron felt little resistance as he pushed his tongue inside Brian’s love canal. This was new to Aaron and his mind was on overload. The taste wasn’t at all what he expected. Brian had done a very good job cleansing himself and what Aaron tasted was a combination of Brian’s fluids and the deodorant soap he had used. The combination was intoxicating. Aaron fucked Brian’s ass with his tongue for several minutes, enjoying the experience tremendously. He then inserted one finger, and then two into Brian and gently finger-fucked him before inserting a third finger, generously lubricating them with the KY.”

“Well, what are you waiting for?” Brian was obviously anxious to go all the way. He reached over and grabbed the box of condoms and tore it open, grabbing a condom, which he rapidly unwrapped and unrolled onto Aaron’s pulsating member. He covered it with a generous amount of KY and added some more KY to his own asshole. Aaron moved himself into position and lined his dick head up with Brian’s hole and gently pushed forward. He was surprised at how quickly and easily he entered Brian - he’d always heard about how difficult and tight it would be. He surmised that the repeated use of suppositories and Brian’s bowel program in general probably kept things loosened up.

“Please go slow, Aaron. I had a brief headache when you first entered me, but it’s subsided now.”

Aaron was worried. “Would you like me to pull out?”

“Fuck no! I want this as much as you do. I may not be able to feel it, but the look on your face when you entered me was absolutely priceless. Don’t worry . . . I’ll tell you if it hurts me . . . but I really, really want you to make love to me. I’ve been waiting a lifetime for this moment and I’m not gonna let my paraplegia get in the way. Just go slow.”

Aaron slowly slid his dick forward into Brian, closely watching his face for any sign of discomfort. Before long, he was completely buried and he felt his pubes touch Brian’s balls. The sensation was incredible. He looked his lover in the eyes and broke into the sweetest grin. Seeing this, Brian grinned back and then they both kissed deeply.

“Please fuck me. Fuck me now.”

“My pleasure, angel.” Aaron started to slowly pull his dick back out of Brian, and then he equally slowly thrust it back forward.

“Faster, Aaron. I’m fine. Trust me, I’ll tell you if I need you to stop.”

Aaron complied, speeding up his thrusting motions as he felt the most incredible sensations pulsing up and down his dick and his spine. He couldn’t believe how good it felt.

“That’s it, babe. I can feel that tingling in my body now. I think I’m gonna cum soon.”

Aaron sped up further and started to gently stroke Brian’s zone of injury as the boys resumed their passionate kissing. Brian reached up and started fondling Aaron’s nipple rings, tremendously amplifying the sensations Aaron was feeling. Almost before he knew what was happening, Aaron felt his balls pull up tightly and that familiar sensation took over as his semen made its way up his urethra and his dick started is rhythmic spasming. He poured jet after jet of his jism into his condom as he felt the most intense orgasm overtake him that he had ever felt.

As his dick softened, Aaron pulled out of Brian only to realize that Brian’s bowels had emptied themselves onto the bed. Brian sat up quickly and looked down in horror.

“Fuck! I’m so sorry, Aaron. I guess this isn’t going to work for us.”

“Shh, baby. You couldn’t help it. Trust me, it was wonderful. How was it for you?”

“Fantastic. I really had an orgasm. I mean, it wasn’t like it was before, but it was the most incredible sensation.”

“Brian, we’ll find a way to make it work. We’ll go on-line in the morning and see what we can find out about this. Where there’s a will, there’s a way. Now let’s get this mess cleaned up before your mattress is ruined.” Aaron chuckled, “I guess there are advantages to using a condom.” Both boys laughed hysterically.


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

24. Trials & Tribulations

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 24 - Trials and Tribulations

The summer got off to a good start. Aaron got a job delivering pizza and Brian indeed found that there was a demand for his skills in math tutoring. He quickly acquired five students ranging in age from eleven to sixteen. Brian was a natural teacher and his patience and the ease with which he explained the most difficult concepts in simple terms brought him another three students by word of mouth. The real highlight of the summer for Brian was driver’s ed. Although he got the distinct impression that the school resented having to equip one of its cars with hand controls and to certify one of its instructors, as far as Brian was concerned - fuck ’em! He had as much right to learn how to drive as anyone. It was a bit difficult learning to use his hands simultaneously to accelerate, brake and steer, but he soon got the hang of it and was able to maneuver on the obstacle course and to parallel park as well as any of the other students.

Their carefree summer wasn’t even half over when it came to an end for Aaron the evening of June 30, the Friday before the fourth of July.

Aaron was ‘enjoying’ yet another Friday night delivering pizzas. His thoughts were on Brian and how they intended to spend the Fourth together. They’d start the day with a hike to Horseshoe Falls, enjoying a picnic lunch when they got there. That would leave them just enough time to get back and join their friends for a barbecue, followed later that night by watching the fireworks display. Aaron was thinking about what else they might do that night to make their own fireworks, when he got a call to make a delivery to a house several miles away.

Someone he vaguely recognized greeted him at the door - at first he couldn’t place the face, but then he remembered the guy was one of the jocks on the school football team. Aaron could hear loud music as he noticed the distinct odor of alcohol on the guy’s breath.

Holding six large pizzas in his hands, he had a very bad feeling about this, which was confirmed when the guy at the door said, “Well, if it isn’t the school fag delivering our pizzas. The guy at the door threw open the door the rest of the way, so that Aaron could see about twenty boys and girls dancing and making out inside. He noticed that the couples were dancing were barely standing upright and were far from keeping up with the beat of the music.

A few other boys came to the door and one of them that Aaron recognized, Scott McDonald, said, “Well, whaddaya know. Aaron Johnson, queer-boy crusader for rights for faggots. Member of the queer student council . . . and all-around slut. Welcome to our little pool party.”

Aaron was about to drop the pizzas and bolt when the first boy grabbed him and bodily pulled him into the house, slamming the door behind them. The girls all looked amused at what was happening, but the boys were dead serious.

“C’mon boys, let’s have some fun,” Scott said as he grabbed the pizzas and handed them to a second boy, and then proceeded to literally rip Aaron’s shirt from his body. “Ooh, lookie here. Look at those nip rings,” he said with an evil grin. He reached down and pulled hard at Aaron’s left nipple ring, causing him to scream in pain. “Typical fag . . . can’t stand a little pain. Fellas, why don’t ya take him out to the pool and keep him busy for a while; I’ve got an idea. . . .”

One of the other boys stepped up and said, “I hear gay boys love to take it up the ass. I bet you’d really like that, wouldn’t you, Aaron boy!” Two of the boys grabbed Aaron under the armpits and pulled him through the house to the back yard pool. “Yeah, we can have some real fun tonight.”

Aaron was nearly in tears. He didn’t know what to do and was scared shitless. When he got to the back yard, Aaron found himself surrounded by six nearly naked football players. He’d had wet dreams like this before he met Brian, but in reality he was too scared to be even the least bit turned on by the sight of the six muscular boys. “Leave me alone. I need to get back to work.”

“Where’s the party spirit, faggot. Wouldn’t you at least like to take a swim?”

Aaron’s eyes opened wide with fear as one of the boys grabbed him while another pair of hands on his legs and before he knew what had happened, he was airborne. He landed in the pool with an enormous splash, surfaced sputtering and then climbed quickly out of the pool. His pants were soaked. His sneakers squished as he walked, but all he could hear was the sound of the six jocks laughing hysterically.

“You think this is fucking funny?” Aaron practically screamed at the boys. “You prolly ruined my fuckin’ watch . . . and my wallet . . . and I’m gonna lose time from my job! You think it’s fucking funny to pick on the faggots, do you? I’ll bet you a few of the people here at this party tonight are gay, and you don’t even know it. One out of ten people are gay, so you do the math. Think about that before you start playing jokes on the ‘school fag’, why don’tcha?”

But the boys weren’t done with Aaron. They quickly blocked Aaron’s way, preventing him from leaving.

“Why are you in such a hurry, Aaron? We’re just starting to have fun. We’re all horny and I bet you give great head. You know you want to, so as I see it, it’s a win-win situation.”

“Don’t you guys fuckin’ get it?” Aaron screamed back. “I’m not a slut, I’m gay! I have a boyfriend, for Christ sake. Why the fuck would I want to do anything with you? You’re dumb jocks, not gods. You don’t have anything I’d want. Now get the fuck outta my way!”

Aaron stunned the boys by pushing his way right through them. They’d never dreamed a faggot could have the balls to act like that. Aaron stormed back through the house, not even caring that he was dripping water on the hardwood floors. But his anger reached new heights when he walked through the front door and found a couple of boys spray-painting his car. They’d nearly finished when Aaron found them. Even the windshield, the windows and the tires were pink.

In fury, Aaron stormed toward his car. With his waterlogged sneakers, his approach was anything but silent. One of the boys looked up and shouted, “Shit!” The voice wasn’t one Aaron recognized. The other boy looked up and Aaron recognized it was Scott. Then both boys took off, running down the street. Aaron was too overwhelmed to pursue them. He just wanted to get the hell out of there, but how could he drive when he couldn’t see through the windshield?

Aaron heard the sound of laughter behind him, but he didn’t dare turn around. He didn’t want to give his tormentors the satisfaction of seeing him cry. Opening the door and getting inside, he sat in his car and totally lost it. He cried for several minutes, grateful that the pink windows hid him from view.

This was the first truly anti-gay incident he’d had to face since he came out and it stung him badly. He knew he had to get out of there, but that meant he’d somehow have to clear his windshield. He didn’t want to leave the security of the car, so out of desperation, he tried using the windshield washer and wipers. Much to his relief, the paint was still wet enough that the wipers were able to clear it. He turned the ignition and barreled back across town, pulling up at Brian’s house in less than ten minutes. He ran to the door and rang the bell.

Brian opened the door and a look of horror spread across his face. “What the fuck happened to you?”

All Aaron could do was to fall to his knees, collapse into Brian’s arms and cry. He cried incessantly and when his crying slowed down, Brian said, “Why don’t you change into some dry clothes we’ll talk about it.”

Aaron nodded his head as he slowly stood back up and closed the door, which he’d left open. Alan Sandler walked in just as Aaron slipped away.

“What happened to Aaron?” Alan asked.

“I don’t know, but he’s soaked. Whatever it is, he’s really upset about it.”

“I think I’d better call his parents while you find out more about what happened.”

“Good idea.”

Aaron returned a few minutes later, wearing a pair of shorts and a loose-fitting T-shirt.

“So what happened?” Brian asked with concern in his face.

“I made a routine delivery to Scott McDonald’s house,” Aaron stammered.

“Scott McDonald? The football jock from our school?”

“Yeah,” Aaron answered. “He and a bunch of his football buddies were having a pool party at his house. They ordered some pizza from you know where, and guess who delivered it?”

Alan emerged from the study as Aaron continued telling what had happened. “They called me ‘faggot’ and ‘queer’, dragged me through the house, and threw me into the pool.”

“Oh Aaron, that’s terrible,” Alan said.

“And that’s not all,” Aaron continued. “When I got outside . . .”

Just then, the doorbell rang. It was Aaron’s parents. Ruth made a beeline for her son and engulfed him in her arms.

“Oh honey, it must have been awful,” she said.

“Who did that to your car, Aaron?” Jim Johnson asked. “Are you alright?”

“What did they do to your car?” Brian asked.

“They painted it pink . . . the body, the windows, the tires . . . all pink.” Jim answered.

Aaron then proceeded to fill his parents in on what had happened.

“I’m going to make two phone calls,” Jim proclaimed. “The sheriff’s office, and Bill Epstein. After the way the sheriff’s office botched the accident investigation, I’m not taking any chances.”

“Dad! You can’t get the police involved. I have to go to school with those guys. If they get in trouble, everyone’ll know it was me, and if they can’t play football, the whole school will blame me and Brian for getting them in trouble.”

“And what if you don’t report it? Then they’ll know they can get away with it. The next time they play a prank on you, it could be even worse. You have to nip this in the bud while you can,” Jim tried to reassure his son.

“Aaron, do you have any idea how much it’ll cost to repaint your car?” Alan asked.

“I dunno. Maybe a few hundred dollars?”

“More like a few thousand dollars, Aaron. That’s a hell of a chunk of your summer earnings. If the guys who did this to you have to pay the cost of their vandalism, they’ll think twice about doing something like this again . . . to you or to anyone else.”

“But right now, the school’s pretty tolerant. If it gets around that we were responsible for getting some of the best players kicked off the football team, that could change.”

“And if you don’t do anything about it, the violence and the hatred will only escalate. Aaron, they’ll walk all over you,” Jim said to his son.

Slowly but surely, Aaron began to see the wisdom in what his father and Mr. Sandler were saying.

As he was lost in thought, Jim interrupted, “Tell you what, Aaron. Why don’t we call Bill Epstein first and ask his advice on how to handle matters with the sheriff’s office. Perhaps there’s a way we can get the boys who played their prank on you to admit to what they did, pay for the damage to your car and do some community service or something, yet keep it all quiet so that no one else needs to know. Personally, I think it would be better if everyone knew, but maybe we can get these guys to wise up in the process, for example, by doing community service at an AIDS shelter.”

“That’s a great idea,” Alan chimed in.

Bill Epstein arrived a short time later and proceeded to photograph Aaron’s car. Everyone stayed up until two AM, waiting for the sheriff’s deputy that never arrived in spite of multiple phone calls. Aaron ended up spending the night at Brian’s house, and Bill returned the next morning.

“Aaron, we’re between a rock and a hard place with this. The longer they wait, the less likely the sheriff’s office will be able to link the paint on your car to the McDonald boy. Unfortunately, the sheriff has a longstanding problem of not having the resources to pursue pranks, but the fact of the matter is that this was a hate crime. I flat out asked one of the deputies how they would have reacted if this were a case of burning a cross in front of a black kid’s house and you can imagine the reaction I got. What happened to you is no less significant.

“I ended up talking to the D.A. and the Youth Court Prosecutor, but when I made the analogy to cross burning, they quickly agreed with me. They called the sheriff and there will be an investigation. As you can imagine, the sheriff is none to happy, but my friend at the DA’s office gave him the choice of investigating this or appearing in front of a grand jury to explain why he didn’t have ‘the time’ to investigate a hate crime

“Anyway, a sheriff’s deputy will be here shortly to take your statement. Based on what you told me last night, we got a judge to sign off on a search warrant of the McDonald premises. I just hope that they’ll find something to link him and his buddies to painting your car.” Aaron and Bill chatted for a while, until they heard the doorbell ring. They opened the door to find a young deputy outside.

“Hello, I’m deputy Reynolds. Is Aaron Johnson here?”

“I’m Aaron. Please come in.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Aaron,” The officer answered as he shook Aaron’s hand. The three of them moved to the great room and joined Brian and his parents. June served everyone coffee, except for Aaron and Brian, who chose to drink orange juice instead.

“First of all,” the deputy began, “I’m sorry it damn near took and act of congress to get the sheriff to take this seriously, but that’s strictly off the record. At least the sheriff had the sensitivity to send a gay officer out to interview you,” the deputy said with a smile. “I don’t go around advertising it, especially around the more homophobic officers, but I don’t hide it, either. In any case, I think it’s horrible what was done to your car, and I can assure you that I’m going to do everything I can to see justice served.”

The deputy spent the better part of an hour interviewing Aaron, pulling out details that Aaron had forgotten when he told the story to everyone else. It was a grueling interview to say the least, and as much as he felt comforted by having a gay cop on his side, he was relieved when the deputy finally left.

The worst of it, however, was the waiting. Aaron knew that McDonald’s house and garage were being searched for evidence, but it could be days before he learned if they found anything. He was too keyed up to do anything and just ended up spending his time with Brian. Since it was a warm day, Aaron took his shirt off.

At three PM, the doorbell rang. Aaron opened it to find a cute young boy who looked to be about twelve or thirteen standing there. Brian saw Aaron looking at the kid in the doorway then realized he’d forgotten about his math tutoring appointment that afternoon. Brian wheeled over and said, “Hi Darren. We’ll get started on your lesson in a bit. I’m sorry, but I forgot about our appointment and haven’t prepared for it. Why don’t you come in and sit down with us.

“Aaron, this is Darren, one of the students I’m tutoring in math. He’s going to be a freshman at our school in the fall. Darren, this is Aaron.” Brian started blushing when he realized that Darren probably had no idea that Brian was gay. He continued, “Darren, the rest of the school knows about me and Aaron, but since you weren’t there last year, you may not know that Aaron and I are boyfriends.”

Darren looked back and forth between Aaron and Brian and started blushing and looked down. Aaron recognized the look. It wasn’t one of disbelief - it was one of shame. The boy turned to Brian and said, “But you’re the sophomore class president. They all elected you, even though you’re gay?”

“Yup. I think you’ll find that our school is pretty tolerant, with a few notable exceptions,” he said.

“And Aaron, you’re Adam Johnson’s brother, aren’t you? I mean, he seems so straight. He’s had a girlfriend, like, forever.”

“Yeah, we’re brothers, and Adam knows I’m gay and is fine with it. He’s straight, and I’m fine with that, too. Since he discovered I’m gay, if anything, it brought us closer together. He’s been very supportive of me and we love each other as much as any brothers could. Perhaps even more . . . we’re more like best friends.”

Darren looked down again. He mumbled something that was inaudible. Aaron walked up to him and stooped down at eye level with him and reached out and lifted Darren’s chin and asked, “Darren, what’s wrong?”

“I . . . I can’t be gay. My parents would never understand. I just can’t be gay. I don’t want to be gay. I mean, I like girls. I think I like girls, but . . . but. . .”

“But what, Darren?”

“But when I look at you and Brian . . . especially you, Aaron, the way you look right now without a shirt and, God, those nipple rings . . . well, it makes me feel tingly all over. I just can’t explain it.”

“Do you feel this way when you see a pretty girl?”

Darren looked flustered. Finally, he said, “Sometimes, but not often . . . truthfully, hardly ever at all.”

“Do you feel this way when you look at other guys.”

“I don’t mean to, but yeah. I’m so confused!”

This time it was Brian who spoke. “Darren, it’s normal for kids our age to be curious about sex and to feel an interest in both sexes. Although I think that a lot of boys probably do experiment with each other and that it’s normal to be a little confused about it, you probably knew who you were by the time you were twelve, and by fourteen . . .”

“You’re fourteen?” Aaron asked in disbelief.

Darren blushed again and said, “Yeah, I’m small for my age.”

Brian continued, “By the time you’re fourteen, you almost certainly know what you like. Now from what you’ve told me here, you’re at least bisexual, and more than likely gay, but that’s nothing to be ashamed of! Tell me, when you, uh, jerk off, what do you think about?”

Darren started sobbing uncontrollably. Aaron went up to him, his own problems and his own pain forgotten momentarily, and he pulled Darren to him and held him tightly as Darren buried his head into his chest and sobbed away. After a while, the sobbing lessened and he looked up at Aaron.

“I guess I’ve always known I’m attracted to boys,” he said as he wiped his eyes. “I tried ignoring it and I even tried denying it, but I always knew. My jerk-off fantasies have always been about seeing cute boys naked. And more recently, about doing things with boys. I tried to tell myself it’s just a phase really, and I do like some girls, but just not that way. I just can’t be gay.”

Brian spoke up, “Darren, it’s not a choice you can make. You know that. You just admitted it. When you fantasize, it’s with boys and no matter how hard you try, you can’t get off by thinking about girls. Am I right?”

Darren slowly nodded, but then added, “But you don’t know my parents.”

“Darren, no parents could have been worse about their son being gay than mine were. They practically disowned me, tried to get me to change, kept me from my friends, and all of this right after our accident. They nearly killed me. Believe me, if my parents could come around, anyone’s can. But there’s no need to rush into telling them. You’ll know when it’s the right time. Now as to not wanting to be gay, well, that’s not something anyone can change. I didn’t want to be gay . . . I just am . . . and I’m glad too! Otherwise I would have never met the most wonderful boyfriend a guy could ever have.”

“Darren,” Aaron began, “Brian and I belong to a group called the Gay-Straight Alliance at school. It’s a group of kids, both gay and straight, who believe in equal rights for gays and that helps gay people to deal with the unique pressures that gay, lesbian and bisexual teens feel in school, and in life. There’s no pressure or anything and you don’t have to even tell people that you’re gay. We have many straight members, so no one would know you’re gay just because you belong.”

“Oh yes they would. My parents would know. How would I explain it to them? How would I explain it to my friends who are so anti-gay?”

“Darren, it’s completely up to you, but I think you’ll find that our high school is a lot different than middle school. Why don’t you think about it? And you can always call Brian or me anytime you just want to talk.”

“Aaron,” Darren said as he started blushing, “could I maybe kiss you? I mean I’ve never kissed anyone before and certainly not a boy, and . . . and . . .”

Before Aaron knew what was happening, Darren practically pounced on him, nearly knocking him to the floor while pressing his lips firmly against Aaron’s. Aaron pushed him away abruptly and Darren suddenly realized what he was doing as a look of utter horror took over his face. He ran to the door, flung it open and ran outside.

“Darren, wait,” Aaron called out as he ran after him, but when Aaron got to the door, Darren was nowhere in sight. Aaron and Brian both feared that Darren might do something rash. Brian wheeled himself to the study and got his dad.

After explaining the situation, the three of them took off in Brian’s mother’s car. Ten minutes later, they spotted Darren running down the street. Brian rolled down the window and called out, “Hey Darren, what in the world do you think you’re doing?”

Darren stopped running and said, “You mean you’re not mad at me?”

“Why would I be mad at you?”

“Because I moved in on your boyfriend.”

Brian’s dad pulled the car up to Darren so that they could talk a bit more privately. Brian replied, “Darren, I know you didn’t mean to move in on my boyfriend. He’s cute. He’s hot and your hormones got the best of you, but I’m not mad at you. Aaron and I both want to help you deal with the gay thing. We’ve done this for a lot of other kids too. We want everyone to find what Aaron and I have found, and to be comfortable with who they are . . . now if you’d rather your father not know about it yet, then we’d better get you back to my house before he shows up.”

Darren again got a look of abject horror on his face as he realized the situation. He quickly hopped in the car and they sped back to Brian’s house. When they got there and walked inside, Brian’s dad took Darren aside and told him, “If you’d like me to talk to your dad about this, I’d be happy to. I know first-hand how stubborn parents can be when it comes to accepting their kids’ homosexuality.”

“No, don’t!” was all Darren could muster. Just then his father pulled up and he grabbed his book bag and was out the door before anyone could say anything else.

“I wonder how Darren’ll explain the pink Accord parked in the driveway?” Aaron mused as Darren and his father sped away. Aaron and Brian wanted to help Darren, but there was little they could do until Darren willingly came to them for help.

Aaron ended up spending the night with Brian again. Although he didn’t really feel like sex, it was a bowel program night and Brian had other ideas that quickly made Aaron forget his troubles. After some repeated throat clearing from Brian’s mom, they retired to Brian’s room, where they continued their make out session.

Brian lovingly stroked Aaron’s chest as they kissed, gently tugging at Aaron’s nipple rings repeatedly as they kissed. As their lips parted, Aaron reached for the hem of Brian’s shirt and pulled it up and over Brian’s head. Brian reciprocated by pulling Aaron’s shorts and boxers down in one smooth motion, letting them settle on Aaron’s feet. Aaron stepped out of them and kicked them away, leaving himself naked in front of the boy he loved.

Aaron’s dick stood at attention as Brian lovingly reached forward and kissed the head. Brian teased Aaron by furtively licking at the underside of Aaron’s dick with the tip of his tongue. He slowly engulfed Aaron’s dick and swallowed it until his nose was buried in Aaron’s pubes. Aaron started to thrust as Brian bobbed up and down, savoring the salty taste and the musky smell of Aaron’s genitals. Brian reached for Aaron’s balls and caressed them, gently rolling them around in his fingers and bringing Aaron to the brink.

Brian slowed down and let Aaron’s dick plop out of his mouth. He took Aaron’s balls into his mouth instead and sucked on them, enjoying the feeling of Aaron’s balls sliding around within Aaron’s sack. Brian wet one of his fingers and brought the tip right against Aaron’s ring. With steady pressure, he penetrated the ring and pushed forward until his finger was rubbing Aaron’s prostate. Aaron let out a soft moan as a stream of precum erupted from his dick and slid down Brian’s face. Brian returned his attention to Aaron’s dick, swallowing it down and applying vigorous suction.

Between the thrusting and the bobbing, not to mention the rubbing of his prostate, Aaron couldn’t hold back any longer. A low moan emerged from the depth of his throat as a tingling sensation worked it’s way from his toes to his chest and then from his balls, right to the tip of his dick, sending spurt after spurt of cum into Brian’s waiting mouth.

After coming down from his orgasmic high, Aaron reached down and passionately kissed his lover, sharing the taste of his own cum.

Getting ready for bed, Aaron catheterized Brian, and then Brian got onto his toilet and inserted a suppository. The boys talked about Darren and their concerns about how he was taking things while waiting for Brian to finish his bowel program. After he was done, Brian got himself on his commode chair and Aaron got out an enema kit. This was the solution they’d found on-line for handling Brian’s bowels when having anal sex - they could either deal with the clean-up before, or after, and before was certainly a lot less messy. Aaron filled the enema bag with warm tap water. He inserted a rectal tube into Brian’s rectum and allowed the water to flow into his lover by gravity. He then clamped the tube shut and waited a several minutes to give the enema time to work. He then disconnected the bag, opened the clamp and allowed the tube to drain into the shower drain. He removed the tube and cleaned himself up using his handheld showerhead. Once dried, the boys then retreated to Brian’s bed, where they lay down naked next to each other and began kissing passionately.

As he kissed him, Aaron began fondling Brian’s nipple rings. It had been much easier to get Brian’s parents to agree to letting Brian have his nipples pierced than they’d ever imagined. After accepting having a gay son, having a son with pierced nipples was nothing. Brian reciprocated by fondling Aaron’s nipple rings as well. Aaron kissed his way down Brian’s neck and gently teased Brian’s nipples with his tongue.

“Oh, man, Aaron. That feels incredible. Instant orgasm. Wow!” Aaron played some more with Brian’s nipples before he went down and started sucking on his cock, and then riming his asshole. He pushed his tongue into Brian and began fucking him with his tongue, and then with his fingers. It was time. Aaron grabbed the KY and a condom and pushed his way into the love of his life. He slowly, but rhythmically fucked Brian as he passionately kissed him, each playing with the other’s nipple rings. Even though Aaron had already cum once that evening, it didn’t take long - Aaron started pumping out spurt after spurt of his cum into the condom as Brian’s spunk flew into the space between their bodies. Slowly, they came down from their mutual highs and just lay there looking into each other’s eyes.

“That was great, Brian. I love you so much.”

“The feeling’s mutual. It is so cool that you can make me cum this way. I never thought it would be possible. I still can’t feel my dick, but I can feel your love, and that makes all the difference. What I feel when I cum is every bit as strong as what I used to feel before the accident. I wouldn't trade what I have with you for my legs or for a million of what the rest of the world calls an orgasm. I love you so much, Aaron. You’re everything to me.”

“That’s so beautiful, Brian.”

The boys fell asleep in each other’s arms, getting up once during the night for Brian to cath himself and turn over.

On Monday, Aaron received a visit from Bill Epstein, who gave him exceptionally good news. Scott McDonald had been stupid enough to throw the cans of spray paint that he used on Aaron’s car away in the trash. Confronted with hard evidence linking him to a potential hate crime, for which he could go to jail, McDonald named all of the boys who had participated in the prank. They all agreed to a plea bargain in which they would pay for the damage done to Aaron’s car and each spend 100 hours of community service working in an AIDS shelter. After they put in their time, the case would be sealed and no one else would know. Aaron couldn’t have been happier with the outcome.

Under pressure from his and Brian’s parents Aaron returned to his job the following night and eventually regained his confidence. Brian continued his tutoring and Darren continued to attend his tutoring sessions while secretly lusting after Aaron.

The Jazz Ensemble played at several gigs that summer, allowing Brian to enjoy his favorite thing in life - that is, next to making love to Aaron.

The summer got off to a rough start for Aaron and Brian, but their busy routine worked to the advantage of their relationship in the end. Before they knew it, it was time for the start of a new school year.


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

25. Coming Apart

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 25 - Coming Apart at the Seams

The start of the school year was hectic for both Aaron and Brian, but for largely different reasons. Aaron was starting to get serious about studying for the SAT’s - yeah, he knew it wasn’t supposed to make a difference - but he wanted to go to a top engineering school, and that meant he needed top scores.

Secondly, he took on a new pet project. Having seen the pain that Darren was going through, he realized that by the time kids reached high school, it was too late to introduce awareness of gay issues into students’ lives. Kids needed to know about what it means to be gay long before they reached high school, and so Aaron started on a crusade to reach middle schoolers. Although simple in principle, he met stiff resistance from just about everyone - both in school administration and with parents. All he wanted was the opportunity to talk to sixth grade students as part of their sex education course, and to reach out to seventh and eight graders as well. The GSA was all for it and a lot of the members joined in the fight, but the only way this was going to happen was to go to the school board, and that meant dealing with politics - an arena in which Aaron had no prior experience.

Brian, for his part, became much busier than he ever anticipated when he ran for sophomore class president. Along with his regular schoolwork and leading the Jazz Ensemble, he found he had new responsibilities in planning for class and school functions that took up far more of his time than he could have dreamed of. If he’d known just how much of an imposition it would be on his life, he would have never accepted the nomination, but he knew how important it was for him to be there, representing people with disabilities and gay teens in a very important and visible role.

Sadly, the boys’ new responsibilities occupied a lot of their time and opportunities for intimacy were fleeting. It had been almost a month since they’d last been intimate when Aaron and Brian finally got together in late September for a night of fun. They completed Brian’s bowel program and enema and Aaron cathed him in the usual way, but both boys were startled when Brian’s legs jumped during the enema, almost throwing him out of his shower chair.

“Man, Brian, I’ve never seen you have spasms like that before.”

“I’ve been noticing spasms a lot more often over the past few weeks, but just assumed it was because of all the pressure I’ve been under.”

After he was done cathing Brian, Aaron said, “Well, your urine is certainly clear enough, so it couldn’t be a urinary infection. Maybe we’d better talk to Dr. Stevens at the rehab center.”

“We can call him on Monday. There’s other things I’d like to do right now,” Brian said, winking at his lover as they then retired to his bedroom for a night of pleasure. They embraced and kissed passionately and Aaron reached down and started to play with one of Brian’s nipple rings.

Suddenly Brian’s eyes flew open and he looked at Aaron in obvious pain. “I . . . I . . . Aaron, I barely felt that, and it burned like crazy!”

“How about the other one?” Aaron asked as he gently touched the other nipple ring.

“Not quite as bad, but it still doesn’t feel normal. OH MY GOD . . . I’m losing my nips!” Brian started crying hysterically as Aaron thought about what he should do. Something was wrong. Something was very wrong.

“Brian, we need to get you to Emergency. I’ve read something about this on the Internet. We need to get an MRI of your spine right away, before it gets even worse.” Both boys were now crying. “C’mon, I’ll help you dress.”

Brian’s parents were out, so Aaron had to drive his boyfriend to the hospital. He made the trip in record time and barged in, pushing Brian’s wheelchair at light-speed. Aaron kept insisting that Brian needed an MRI right away, but that didn’t stop them from being seen by the triage nurse, an intern, a resident, an emergency attending physician, a neurology resident, a neurologist, a neurosurgery resident and finally a neurosurgeon before the MRI was even ordered. It would be hours before the machine would be free.

In the meantime, Brian’s and Aaron’s parents arrived and they took turns visiting with Brian as he waited and waited for his scan. It was already sunrise by the time Brian was finally taken for his MRI.

This was something completely new to Brian, and he was terrified of what the doctors might find. Sadly, his nipple rings had to be cut and removed before he could enter the scanner. The technician helped him transfer from his gurney to the MRI exam table. The technician explained the procedure to Brian, but he barely focused on what he was being told. He then found himself sliding into the maw of the machine. The tube he was inside of was so narrow, he felt he barely had room to breathe. It felt like he was inside a coffin! He underwent a series of scans, all lasting several minutes and accompanied by a deafening knocking and pounding sound. After more than a half hour of scanning, his vein was injected with something and the scanning continued. Finally, after fifty minutes, it was all over.

Brian was taken back to his cubicle in Emergency and he waited anxiously with Aaron and one or the other set of parents. Finally, another neurosurgeon appeared with a resident and medical student. He introduced himself as Dr. Michaels and started to speak slowly.

“Well, son, we’ve found the problem. You have post-traumatic syringomyelia, or rather, a syrinx for short. What this means is that the fluid that bathes the spinal cord has been accumulating inside your spinal cord, creating a small cavity that is expanding and gradually causing further damage. It’s probably been there for weeks or even maybe months, but has grown so slowly that you didn’t even notice the change until you started to lose feeling.”

“So what do we do?” Aaron asked.

“Well in spite of the way it may seem, this isn’t an emergency. It needs to be taken care of fairly soon, but the cavity is growing slowly and you have a little time. We’re talking about doing something in the next few weeks . . . not hours. Now before I explain what I’d like to do, I want to tell you that I’ve already contacted Dr. Stevens and he has suggested that you might want to get a second opinion. Syrinx surgery is controversial and while my specialty is spine surgery and I’ve done several of these procedures before, there are a handful of neurosurgeons in the U.S. who do nothing but this type of surgery.”

“What does the surgery involve?” Alan Sandler asked.

“The most conservative procedure and the one I’d like to do is to drain the syrinx and to place a small plastic catheter into the syrinx to allow it to drain, preventing further enlargement of the cavity. I have to tell you that this more than likely will not reverse the damage that has already been done.” Brian started sobbing as Dr. Michaels continued. “The reason we need to do this is to prevent any further damage. Now I know it seems like you’ve lost a lot already, but left untreated, the syrinx will continue to expand, eventually making you tetraplegic.”

“Tetraplegic?” Aaron questioned.

“I’m sorry, tetraplegia is the official international term for what most Americans call quadriplegia.”

“Oh,” Aaron said. “What is the success rate for this procedure?”

“It’s not as high as we’d like it to be. It’s successful the first time in less than half of the cases, and we can achieve satisfactory results with additional procedures in most patients, although these ‘shunting’ procedures often have to be repeated in time, regardless.”

“Is this the same procedure that the neurosurgeons Dr. Stevens recommended would be doing?”

“No. As I said, the treatment is controversial. What Dr. Stevens has in mind is much more extensive, but carries much more risk. That’s why he thinks that only neurosurgeons who’ve done hundreds of these procedures should do them. The difference between what I would do, and what they would do, is that they would try to alleviate the cause of the fluid collection in the first place. Now we really don’t know why this happens, but one of the prevailing theories is that scar tissue around the cord prevents it from sliding as you move, causing it to degenerate from the inside. The theory is that the fluid that accumulates is a symptom rather than the cause of the damage. The alternative treatment is called de-tethering, and it involves carefully removing the adhesions and freeing up the spinal cord so that it can slide freely, as it’s supposed to.”

“Will this de-tethering procedure bring back Brian’s lost function?” Aaron asked.

“Probably not, but there are some reports that a few of these patients have recovered function. The results aren’t spectacular, but they’re a lot better than anything I can offer Brian myself. The down side is that this is a very extensive procedure that takes nearly all day to perform. The surgical risks are much higher, and there is more opportunity for something to go wrong. Brian could lose even more function . . . or worse.”

June Sandler started crying hysterically, but Brian himself became eerily calm. He turned to Dr. Michaels and said, “I don’t want a half-assed, temporary fix. I know there’s more risk, but I’m willing to take it. I want to have the de-tethering procedure. Who did Dr. Steven’s say is the best person for doing this?”

Dr. Michaels gave them all the information and he obtained permission from Brian and his parents to Fed-Ex Brian’s medical record and scans to Colorado.

After Brian was discharged from Emergency and had returned to school, he could scarcely keep his mind on his studies, and he let all his extracurricular activities and responsibilities slide. The wait for word from Colorado was interminable. Finally, he received word that he was a good candidate for the procedure and that surgery was set for Tuesday, October 17. That meant even more waiting, and the level of anxiety in both the Sandler and Johnson households became increasingly palpable as the date approached.

Before leaving, Brian dropped out of the Jazz Ensemble and resigned his post as class president. Aaron and his friends had begged him not to, but Brian was adamant - he would be incapacitated by the surgery for weeks and his recovery and rehabilitation would be slow. The sophomore class needed a president and it wouldn’t be fair for the alternate to have to relinquish the post when Brian was finally able to return. After some tearful goodbyes, The Sandlers and Aaron headed to Colorado.

They arrived late on Sunday evening and settled into their hotel. On Monday, they spent a little time doing some sightseeing and the boys enjoyed visiting the Denver Mint. They joked about getting some ‘free samples’ to take home with them. Everyone went out for a nice dinner that evening, but no one really had an appetite and most of the food went untouched. They returned to the hotel early, and woke up early on Tuesday morning in anticipation of Brian’s surgery.

As instructed, they arrived by 6:00 AM - in fact, they were nearly an hour early. All of Brian’s lab results that were sent from home seemed to be in order and the surgery was a go.

At 6:15, Brian was wheeled back into the pre-surgical waiting area and his parents and Aaron were allowed to join him. Everyone was surprised by the lack of an accessible changing room and Brian was forced to go to the one accessible restroom in the area to change out of his clothes and into a hospital gown. He returned to the waiting area and gave his clothes to his parents for safekeeping.

At 6:30, he was moved to a pre-op room and an IV was placed in his left hand. A few minutes later, a nurse told him it was time and he was lifted up onto the gurney, which was too high for Brian to transfer himself to from his wheelchair. His parents and Aaron were escorted to the family waiting room.

For Brian it was déjà vu as he was wheeled on his back to the OR and transferred to the operating table. The anesthesia resident introduced himself to Brian and asked the usual questions about allergies and family history of adverse reactions to anesthesia, and then examined him. The Neurosurgeon came into the room and introduced himself for the first time to Brian, and told him he had nothing to worry about. ‘Easy for him to say’, Brian thought to himself. The anesthesia resident attached a very large syringe containing a milky-looking fluid to Brian’s IV, and wished Brian pleasant dreams as he started to push the plunger down on the syringe. Within seconds, Brian’s world went black.

Aaron paced back and forth in the waiting room as the morning wore on. It had been more than three hours since he’d last seen Brian and it was still early. He couldn’t stand it! He tried reading some of the old magazines in the waiting room, but couldn’t focus on what he read. He tried reading a favorite book he’d brought with him, but found himself reading the same paragraph over and over again. He played his PSP for a while, but kept losing miserably - he just couldn’t concentrate. He tried watching TV, but Jerry Springer was featuring yet another gay man leaving his wife and kids to start a new life with his part-time lover of the past eight years. It was just tasteless, Aaron thought to himself, exploiting the misery of others, and he knew firsthand how difficult this sort of thing could be. Brian’s dad was essentially thinking the same thing.

Finally, June Sandler got up and said, “Aaron, let’s go. There’s no point in being here and it’s going to be several more hours before we hear anything at all.”

“But what if something happens? What if something goes wrong? Brian needs me here.”

“Honey, nothing’s going to go wrong. You’re not doing Brian any good pacing back and forth, driving everyone else in the room crazy. We both have our cell phones. You know that Alan will call us immediately if there’s any news. Let’s go to the cafeteria and grab a light meal. You must be even more starved than I am. Then maybe we can come back here and check on things.”

Aaron didn’t want to leave, but his stomach was rumbling and even he had to admit he was absolutely starving, since he hadn’t had breakfast. They headed down to the cafeteria and Aaron ordered pancakes, eggs, bacon, sausage, orange juice and coffee. He didn’t ordinarily eat this kind of breakfast, but he was famished and, surgery or not, he was a very hungry teenager. Brian’s mom, on the other hand, just had a bagel and coffee.

As they ate, Mrs. Sandler started to speak, “You know, Aaron, Alan and I think the world of you. You’re like a son to us and we could never thank you enough for what you have done for Brian. What I’m saying, Aaron, is that we love you. You’re a fine, wonderful person.”

“I love you too, Mrs. Sandler. You’re like a mother to me and you and Mr. Sandler have done a fine job of raising a wonderful young man who’s the love of my life.”

“Please call me June, Aaron. I should hope you see me as more than Brian’s mother, and in just a year-and-a-half, you’ll officially be an adult. However, you’ve been acting as an adult for a while now. Your childhood ended on that terrible night in February, and I think you know exactly what I mean. You made a very childish mistake, but you rose above it and took responsibility for it. You’ve been a wonderful boyfriend to my son, and a good friend to Alan and me. Please call me June, adult to adult, and feel free to call my husband Alan.”

“Well, June, it’s gonna be hard to get used to that, but I see what you’re saying and it would be kinda silly for me to still be calling you Mrs. Sandler ten years from now. Me an adult? Well, I’m not as confident about that as you are, but I appreciate the compliment. You know how terrible I feel about the accident, but I can’t dwell on it. I still worry about Brian, though. Even before the syrinx, I was worried. I just don’t think he’s come to terms with the accident and with being paralyzed. God knows I’ve tried to get him to counseling. I know you have, too. He’s just so stubborn. Now he’s going through this again and he still hasn’t dealt with the first injury.”

“Aaron, I’m glad you told me this. I’ve been worried, too. I was going to bring it up with you, but I’ve worried a bit about whether or not you’ve fully dealt with the accident.”

Aaron thought for a moment and then said, “I do still have nightmares about it and probably will for some time. After the accident, when Brian was in rehab, I cried and screamed and threw things across the room and cursed. I think only Adam knows about it, and maybe my parents. I know there’ll still be residual guilt for some time to come, but I no longer blame myself for what happened . . . and I’ve accepted Brian as he is . . . physically and emotionally. No matter what the outcome of the surgery, I’ll still love Brian as much as I did the first time I set eyes upon him, and maybe more.

“But the recent change has shaken Brian to the core. He’s living very well with his disability, but I don’t think he fully accepts it in his mind. It’s kinda like he’s separated himself from his reality. I think he sees himself as living someone else’s life while he’s put his own on hold. Then on top of all that, this happened. I’m really worried about him.”

“Me, too, Aaron. After this is over and Brian’s back home, you and I have got to make a concerted effort to get Brian into counseling. He needs it desperately. For his sake, we all need it.”

They returned their trays and went back to the family waiting room, where Alan had dozed off. June gently shook his shoulder. “Woah - what? Oh . . .”

“No news, I suppose.” June stated more than asked.

“Not yet.”

“Why don’t you go get something to eat while Aaron and I hold down the fort?”

Alan looked around, still half asleep, and headed off without saying anything. Aaron and June continued to talk.

“Aaron, how’s the college search going?”

“Well, I dunno. I mean always wanted to go to an Ivy League school and kinda had my heart set on MIT, but I can’t leave Brian, and this just drives it home to me.”

“You’ve got to follow your dreams, Aaron. You’ll never be happy if you don’t. What’s worse is you’ll subconsciously always blame Brian for your not going to MIT and he’ll always feel guilty, wondering if he held you back. I’m not saying it wouldn’t be tough on the both of you to be apart, but you’ve still got a long way to go in getting your education. Don’t shortchange yourself. Besides if you do get into MIT, Boston’s one big college town. Brian’s bright and will probably get into whatever school he chooses, so chances are good that he could find something in Boston, too. And Boston’s a gay-friendly city.”

“It’s not all that wheelchair-friendly, though. Oh, the schools are all very accessible, but public transit is far from fully accessible and the cost of living is outrageous. Besides, look at what happened . . . Brian still needs you. He has a great house here with you and there are several highly-respected universities within commuting distance that either of us could attend.”

“Aaron, I don’t expect Brian to live with us forever. Eventually, he will need to leave the nest, and with you at his side, he’ll be fine wherever you end up. The bottom line is that I think you should do what’s best for you first, even if it means the two of you wind up at different schools in different parts of the country. I know it would be hard, but you can’t sell yourself short. At least apply, Aaron. If nothing else, it’ll be fun to turn down that acceptance letter from MIT. Promise me that much.”

Aaron laughed at that. “OK, June. I promise, and I don’t break my promises.”

Alan returned from the cafeteria and the three of them chatted for a while before Aaron decided that he felt like taking a walk. He walked for what seemed like hours. He exited the hospital and just took off in a random direction, shivering slightly in the cold autumn air. He walked and walked, but his mind was empty and he was numb. The boy he loved more than anything in the world was lying unconscious on an operating table while a man he didn’t even know was performing the most delicate microsurgery imaginable.

Then there was everything June had said. He knew that one day he would leave for college, but he’d put all thoughts of this on hold since he’d met Brian. Now he realized that a decision would soon be upon him. Should he follow his academic dreams and possibly lose the one person who meant more to him than anyone, or should he compromise slightly and stay with the one he loved? Could the two of them possibly find something that would fit both their dreams? Aaron was in such turmoil and he didn’t know what to do.

After quite some time, he realized he was hungry again and he stopped at a BK for a grilled chicken sandwich. It was OK - nothing great - but it was food and fit a need. After eating, he took out his cell phone and called the Sandlers to ask if there was any news. They told him there wasn’t any news, yet, and said they were worried about him, but he assured them he was all right. He hung up the phone and decided he probably should get back to the hospital to be sure he’d be there when Brian came out of surgery. When he got back, he couldn’t believe it was already after four o’clock. Only then did he realize that his legs were sore.

At a little after five, the neurosurgeon walked into the family waiting room and approached the Sandlers and Aaron. He told them that the surgery had gone well and that Brian would be in the recovery room for about an hour, and then taken to his own room after that. He felt that the surgery had been a success, but only time would tell. They thanked the neurosurgeon and went up to Brian’s room to wait for him.

Already in the room was a boy who looked to be about Brian’s age, along with what Aaron assumed to be his parents. The boy had half of his head shaved and there was a long surgical incision extending over a good portion of the side of his head.

Aaron walked up to the boy and introduced himself to him and his parents. He found out that the boy was recovering from surgery on an astrocytoma - a brain tumor with a fairly poor prognosis that’s common in kids and young adults. Aaron really felt bad for the boy, but his attention was quickly diverted when Brian was wheeled into the room on a gurney and transferred to his bed.

Aaron went over to see Brian, who was still very groggy, and he leaned down and gave Brian a quick kiss on the lips. Brian looked up at his boyfriend and broke out in the sweetest smile. “Please do that one more time,” he said. Aaron leaned down and this time Brian applied gentle suction and slipped his tongue into Aaron’s mouth. Aaron was somewhat aware that he heard the curtain separating the beds being drawn - obviously someone wasn’t comfortable with what they were seeing - but he didn’t really care. Everything that meant anything to him was in the bed in front of him. They continued kissing for a while until Brian’s parents stepped in.

“Sorry about that, June.”

“You called my mom June?”

“She asked me to, Brian. And somehow it just seems right.”

“Yeah, I guess,” Brian said.

Brian remained in the hospital in Colorado for just over a week. Aaron kept current with his studies as best he could through e-mail and IM chat sessions with classmates.

It quickly became apparent that Brian was actually worse following the surgery, but he had been warned to expect this. He would likely feel worse before he got better, but hearing that didn’t help when it became apparent that he now couldn’t feel his nipples at all. With this, he became despondent and sunk into a deep depression. He did his best to keep up an act for his parents and Aaron, but they weren’t buying it and he wouldn’t let them in. Everyone was worried about him, and the last thing Brian wanted, was for them to worry about him.

Finally, it was time for Brian to leave the hospital, but it was not yet safe for him to fly and so he stayed with his parents and Aaron in the hotel for another week. Halloween came and went and the boys both mused that they were missing the annual GSA Halloween ball - an event that they’d both been looking forward to. They were finally able to head home the first week in November.

Getting back to school was difficult for both boys, and Brian had an added burden of returning to a grueling outpatient physical therapy program while dealing with significant post-operative pain. Obvious to everyone but himself, Brian had sunk even deeper into depression. He still couldn’t feel his nipples and his leg spasms were much worse, requiring the use of escalating doses of medications. Aaron and his parents tried to reach him, but he effectively shut them out.

Although Aaron continued to drive Brian to and from school and therapies, Brian wouldn’t talk to Aaron and he shut him down every time he brought up the idea of counseling. Brian just kept telling him to ‘fuck off’ and mind his own business. Brian wouldn’t let Aaron spend the night with him and he wouldn’t even kiss him. When it came time for the one year anniversary of their meeting, Aaron gave Brian a card, but Brian just set it aside and didn’t even open it. He just left it in the car. Aaron was crushed, and he went home and silently cried himself to sleep.

The next day, it took Aaron all of his willpower to pick Brian up and drop him off at school. He knew that Brian needed him and he wanted to be there for him, but he knew he couldn’t quite forgive him for ignoring the most important day of their lives together. He decided that Brian had to know how he felt.

While they drove to school, Aaron took a deep breath and began, “Brian, I know that you have a lot on your mind right now, but please, hear me out. You don’t have to say anything and, frankly, I’d rather you wouldn’t. I think you know that you took things a bit too far yesterday. You crushed my heart, and maybe that’s what you wanted to do, but I want you to know that it hurt me more than anything anyone has ever done to me in my life. You know I love you more than anything. I’ve loved you for a year now and nothing you do or say can change that.

“Now you’ve been pretty shitty to me since we got back from Colorado. If there’s anything I have done to hurt you, just tell me what it is and I’ll do whatever it takes to make it up to you. If you’re angry with me for any reason, please give me the courtesy of telling me why.” Aaron gulped. “But if you just don’t love me any more, I need to hear that, too. I don’t think I could continue to see you then, but I’ll continue to drive you until you can make other arrangements. Just know that I’m here for you and I’ll do anything to regain your trust, and your love.”

After a long pause, Brian finally spoke, “Aaron, I know I haven’t exactly been fair to you, but I’m going through a lot as you said and I still haven’t gotten back to where I was before the surgery. I don’t know if I’ll ever get back what I had. Honestly, I don’t know if I love you any more. I know that must hurt like hell, but it’s the truth. Maybe I am wallowing in my own self-pity, but I have to get through this on my own.”

“You’re wrong Brian . . .”

“No, Aaron, you really don’t know me at all. I have to do this myself. I don’t expect you to wait for me and if you find someone else before I find my way, then it’ll be my loss . . . not yours. Please don’t hate me and I’ll find some other way to get to school and to my therapies. I feel badly for you, for all the guys in the Jazz Ensemble, and for the entire sophomore class. I’ve let you all down, but right now I just can’t deal with these things. I’m sorry, Aaron. I really am . . . and in my own way, I’ll miss you terribly.

“Goodbye, Aaron. Please don’t bother picking me up. And please don’t call . . . I don’t want to see or talk to you any more. Here,” Brian said as he removed the ID bracelet Aaron had given him on the day he returned from rehab. “Give this to someone more deserving of it . . . someone who’ll love you back.”

Aaron watched in silence as Brian set the bracelet down on his seat, then got his wheelchair out and wheeled himself into their school. Aaron rested his head on the steering wheel and sat there for a long time, just crying. He couldn’t bring himself to enter the school, and ended up driving himself home, throwing himself onto his bed and crying until he could cry no more.

Aaron knew his life would never be the same. His mother was right - first loves rarely last.


Discuss the Story

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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

26. Hope & Despair

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 26 - Hope and Despair

More than two months had passed since Brian’s devastating breakup with Aaron. Another meaningful anniversary had come and gone.

Aaron was barely able to get through Thanksgiving, but the anniversary of his first kiss with Brian was a day he didn’t think he could live through - but he did. Winter break was also hard on him. His parents got him a new laptop, but it was small consolation. All he really wanted was Brian. He still loved Brian very much and it embarrassed him that he still fantasized about him when he jerked off - somehow, it would have felt like cheating to imagine being with anyone else.

At first he called June and Alan nearly every day - they were like second parents to him - but eventually the conversation became more and more difficult with time as he and Brian seemed to be going their separate ways. For their part, the Sandlers were very concerned with Brian’s deepening depression - his doctor had put him on fluoxetine, but it barely seemed to make a dent in his mood.

Aaron’s lowest point came on the anniversary of the accident. He knew that this would be particularly difficult time for Brian and no matter how hard Brian had tried to push him away, he instinctively knew that Brian needed him then more that ever. February third was a Saturday and Aaron decided he would try to spend the day with Brian. He drove over, unannounced, just after lunch, certain that Brian would be up by then.

June greeted him warmly at the door. She hugged him tightly and he hugged her back.

“Aaron, it’s so good to see you. We’ve really missed you.”

“I’ve missed you too, June, more than you can know.”

“Alan’s out playing a round of golf with his buddies. Otherwise, I’m sure he’d love to see you.”

“How’s Brian holding up today?”

“He’s still in bed if you can believe it.”

“Well, he’s not exactly an early riser, but this is extreme, even for him. I can only imagine how depressed he is about today.”

“Why don’t you go wake him up? I’m sure he could use the company, even if you two aren’t boyfriends anymore.”

Aaron quietly entered Brian’s room. Brian was lying in bed with his eyes closed. To Aaron, he looked like an angel. That he couldn’t kiss Brian literally tore at his heart, but he had to put his personal feelings aside. Brian needed him today, and he would be there for him.

Quietly, Aaron approached his sleeping beauty and gently shook his shoulder. Brian’s eyes flew open and he immediately tried to bring himself to a sitting position. Because Brian had no functioning muscles below his nipples, including his trunk muscles, however, sitting up in bed was difficult for him. He’d learned to balance himself at the rehab center, but with the function he’d lost since the operation, he was having a particularly difficult time sitting up.

Aaron tried to lend Brian a hand, but Brian forcefully pushed him away as he collapsed back onto the bed in the process. He looked back up at Aaron with a livid glare of anger. Aaron would never forget the look of hatred in Brian’s eyes.

“Get the fuck away from me!” Brian shouted at Aaron in a fit of rage. “I don’t want to see your face . . . especially today!”

“Brian, I know you don’t love me any more, but we had something very special. More importantly, I care about you a great deal and I know how difficult today must be for you. I just thought you might want someone with you today . . . someone beside your parents.”

“Well you thought wrong asshole! I just want to be alone! I don’t know what I ever saw in you. I certainly don’t love you, if I ever did. The one thing I know for sure is, that if I’d never met you, I wouldn’t be in a wheelchair. Get out of my life, Aaron . . . you’ve fucked it up enough already.”

Aaron couldn’t stand it any more. He’d promised himself that no matter what Brian might say, he’d stick by him today, but he couldn’t take it - Brian had ripped out his heart again, and crushed it, shaking Aaron to the core.

Aaron raced out of Brian’s room as the tears started to pour down his face. June tried to intercept him, but he pushed her away and raced out the door and jumped in his car. He sped away, but had to pull over in less than a block - the tears clouded his vision too much for him to drive. He’d driven far enough, though. He just wanted to get away from the Sandler’s house.

When the tears ebbed, he just drove around aimlessly, but then he got up the courage to go to the scene of the accident. He pulled to the side of the road, with a clear view of Lewis and Elm, and just sat there watching the traffic go by. He sat for hours, his mind totally numb. He didn’t eat, he didn’t drink and, because he was dehydrated, he didn’t even have to go to the bathroom.

As day turned to night, a storm system moved in and it started to sleet. Aaron didn’t care - the weather outside his car very much mirrored the feeling inside his heart. What Brian said was devastating. He’d never loved Aaron. After all the wonderful times they’d had together and all the incredible sex, Brian said he’d never loved him. Aaron wept more tears than he ever thought he had in him.

Finally, Aaron threw the car into gear and drove through the intersection, shuddering as he did so. When he got home, his mother started to approach him, but when she saw the look on his face, she backed away. Ruth Johnson knew her son and knew he couldn’t be approached just yet; he would talk to her when he was ready.

Slowly, Aaron climbed the stairs, and threw himself on his bed. After a few minutes of sobbing into his bedspread, he felt someone sit down on the edge of his bed.

“You want to talk about it, bro?”

Aaron didn’t want to talk, but there was something disarming about the way Adam talked and he marveled again at what a best friend his brother was to him. Aaron turned over and lay on his back to face his brother.

“He said he never loved me,” Aaron said as he started crying again. “He said he doesn’t know what he ever saw in me.”

Adam reached down and squeezed his brother’s shoulder. “You know none of that’s true. I saw how he looked at you. There is no doubt that he was very much in love with you.”

“Adam, Brian said something else that hurt. It hurt me more than anything. He said that if he’d never met me, he wouldn’t be in a wheelchair. I know the accident wasn’t my fault, but he’s absolutely right. That’s a lot to live with.”

Adam leaned over and hugged his brother tightly. “You’re right . . . you had nothing to do with it. The accident was a random thing. You guys were in the wrong place at the wrong time. Tomorrow I could skip breakfast, and then walk into a convenience store while it’s being robbed and get shot. Would this be my fault because I skipped breakfast? Of course not! Your meeting Brian has nothing to do with the accident.”

Aaron and Adam stayed like that for a while until Aaron’s breathing slowed and became more regular. Recognizing that his brother had fallen asleep, Adam tiptoed out of the room.

When Monday came, it took Aaron all the courage he could muster to return to school. He knew he’d run into Brian sooner or later and he didn’t think he could take it, but he knew he’d have to. At lunchtime, he sat at his usual table. Since breaking up with Brian, he’d been sitting with Scott, Jared, Sharon, Jackie and some other friends from the GSA, all of whom were now out, while Brian and Larry sat alone at another table. Aaron couldn’t blame Larry for standing by his longtime friend, but Aaron missed Larry’s infectious personality. Over the past months, Aaron would often steal glances at Brian as he ate, wishing somehow they could be together again.

But this Monday was different. As Aaron ate his lunch, he looked over and saw Brian, not as the boy he loved, but as the boy who hurt him. The thought pierced his heart and sent a chill down his spine. Brian was no longer his, and he had to move on. Aaron resolved then and there to start dating again. Dating other boys was the only way he would ever get over Brian.

Looking around the cafeteria, he spotted a familiar face among the crowd. It had been a while since Aaron had spoken to Darren and, in truth, he hadn’t thought about him much at all, but seeing him laughing and having a good time with his friends, Aaron couldn’t help but notice how cute Darren really was. That evening, he decided to give Darren a call.

“Hello?” It was a man’s voice that he didn’t recognize.

“Hello, is Darren there?”

“Just a minute.”

Aaron waited a bit and then he heard Darren answer.

“Hello, Darren? Hi, it’s Aaron. Aaron Johnson.”

The line was silent for several seconds and then Darren finally answered. “Aaron? H . . . hi. H . . . how are y . . . you?”

“I’m fine, Darren. Well, not really fine, but I’m OK.”

“What’s wrong?"

“Well, you know that Brian and I have broken up.”

“I figured as much, since you don’t even sit together any more.” Aaron could hear the feeling of hope in Darren’s voice.

“Darren, I don’t want to hurt you. I won’t lie to you . . . I still love him, but it doesn’t look like there’s much hope of our getting back together. I need to move on and it’s going to be very difficult for me, and in a way, for anyone I go out with right now. I’m on the rebound, as they say.”

“Are you asking me out? Are you really asking me out?”

“Well, yeah, but I care about you and I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Aaron, I’ve been jerking off to fantasies of you ever since we met. . . . I know how much you must be hurting right now . . . I saw how much you and Brian loved each other . . . but I’m willing to take that chance. So, yeah, I’d love to go out with you!”

“How about we take in a flick this Saturday.”

“That’d be great! But please remember, I’m very much in the closet and want to keep it that way. Everyone at school knows you’re gay, so I can’t be seen with you. And I definitely don’t want my folks to know.”

“Fair enough. I’ve got a car and can drive us anywhere. Let’s say I pick you up at two and we go to a movie well away from here, where no one knows us. We’ll go out for dinner afterwards, and then maybe come back to my place.”

“I’d love that.”

Aaron was nervous as hell when Saturday rolled around. Finally, it was time to pick Darren up and it took all his willpower to keep his mind focused on his driving. When he got to Darren’s house, Darren rushed out the door and into his car before he even came to a stop. Darren was so cute! They chatted a bit as they headed out of town and headed to the Regal Theater about an hour away.

Soon, Aaron was beginning to feel more relaxed and the conversation flowed. He found that Darren had a sister who was in the seventh grade and a brother who was ten. Darren was a big soccer player, but didn’t really like spectator sports and hated football. His music tastes tended toward rap and hip hop, which Aaron really didn’t care for. Darren was a pretty average student who did OK in English, but hated math and science, Aaron’s favorite subjects.

When they got to the theater, Aaron bought a couple large buckets of popcorn and some large cokes. They sat in the back and talked a while until the lights dimmed for the previews. When the feature presentation came on and the lights dimmed all the way, Aaron soon felt a hand on his thigh. He turned and looked at Darren, who looked back and grinned at him. Darren started stroking his thigh, moving his hand closer and closer to Aaron’s crotch with each stroke. Aaron knew where this would lead, and this wasn’t the time or place for it. He took hold of Darren’s hand and held it firmly as he leaned forward and kissed Darren on the lips. Darren kissed him back and soon the two boys were engaged in a serious lip lock.

Aaron couldn’t help but feel guilty, as if he was cheating on Brian but, damn, it felt so good to be kissing a boy again. When he closed his eyes, he could almost make himself believe he was kissing Brian. Aaron never really got to see the movie and when the lights came back up, their popcorn and drinks had hardly been touched. They took their munchies out with them and got some pizza at the food court. They sat down and resumed their conversation as they ate their ‘dinner’. When they finished, Aaron suggested that they head to his house and Darren readily agreed.

When they got to Aaron’s house, he introduced Darren to his parents, who were pleased to see Aaron moving on with his life. They were deeply saddened by his and Brian’s breakup and had been worried about him, so they saw his date with Darren as a positive step.

When Aaron and Darren got upstairs, Adam was in his room playing a game on his computer. Aaron introduced Darren to his brother, but they already knew each other and just said ‘hi’. Aaron saw a look of anger and disgust on Adam’s face, but he chose to ignore it for the moment.

Aaron led Darren into his room and closed and locked the door behind them. Darren heard the click of the door lock and was ecstatic with anticipation. Aaron had intended to show Darren some of the things in his room, but Darren never gave him the chance as they were once again engaged in a passionate kiss. Aaron pushed Darren away.

“Darren, could we slow down a bit. It’s too soon for me.” However, Darren would have none of that and he practically pounced back on Aaron and pushed him down and onto the bed.

When they separated, Darren pulled off his shirt and Aaron couldn’t help but marvel at the incredibly cute fourteen-year-old boy with sandy hair, hazel eyes, a lightly freckled face and a smooth chest. Darren reached down and started to unbutton Aaron’s shirt. Aaron tried to pull Darren’s hands away, but Darren was persistent and he managed to completely unbutton and open Aaron’s shirt.

“God, you’re beautiful,” Darren said as he again attacked Aaron with his passionate kisses. Feeling Darren’s silky skin against his own chest, Aaron couldn’t help but get aroused. Before he knew what was happening, Darren had unbuckled Aaron’s belt and unzipped his jeans. Darren reached in and gently fondled Aaron’s dick through his boxers. Aaron wanted to stop him, but when Darren exposed Aaron’s dick and took it into his mouth, Aaron became completely powerless. It didn’t take long for him to send spurt after spurt into Darren’s waiting mouth.

Aaron immediately felt guilty after it was over. “We shouldn’t have done that. It was just too soon.”

“But I wanted it, Aaron. I wanted it bad.”

“Yeah, but I didn’t want it . . . at least not yet. Look, we didn’t even use condoms. You pushed it, Darren.”

Darren started to cry. “I knew it was too good to be true.”

Aaron reached over and pulled Darren into a hug as he whispered into his ear, “I’m not saying we can’t eventually be boyfriends and do things like that, Darren, but it’s too soon for me. Hell, it’s probably too soon for any relationship. Sex should grow out of love, and not the other way around. I know you just got a bit carried away and I don’t hold it against you. Someday, maybe we’ll do this again and more . . . maybe a lot more. You just need to give it some time.”

Aaron drove Darren back to his house. Before leaving, Darren leaned forward and gave Aaron a passionate kiss on the lips. Just then, the porch light came on and they separated quickly as Darren’s father opened the door. “I sure as hell hope he didn’t see us.” Aaron said.

“Me more than you . . . Well, if he did see us, I guess I’d better go face the music.”

“Would you like me to come with you?”

“Nah. That’d only make things worse. I gotta go. See ya.”

Aaron really worried about Darren on his short drive home, but he was about to find there was someone else he had to worry about. When he got to his room and started to close the door, Adam pushed it open and barged into his room, shutting the door behind them.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Adam shouted at Aaron with a vehemence he’d never seen from his brother before. “What the fuck’s gotten into you?”

“Adam, I . . .”

“Don’t give me any of that bullshit. I’m not buyin’ it. Do you have any idea what this’ll do to Brian?”

“Adam, it’s over between Brian and me.”

“The hell it’s over! I see him every day. I’ve seen him secretly watching you when you weren’t looking. He’s far from over you. He’s no more over you than you are of him!”

Aaron was stunned. The way he’d left things, Brian had made it clear that he didn’t want anything to do with him anymore. “Adam, he told me he doesn’t think he ever loved me. He told me I need to see other people. He told me he needs to work things out on his own, and he blames me for his being paralyzed.”

“And do you really believe any of that crap?”

Aaron thought for a minute and then finally said, “No . . . well, I’m not sure. Adam, do you have any idea what this is doing to me? I’ve been there for Brian all along, but he just kept pushing me away. I loved him so much . . . I still do . . . but there’s only so much pain I can take.”

“The pain you may be feeling is nothing compared to the pain Brian feels. He still wants you. He wants you bad. If he said he didn’t love you, he was lying. I see the way he still looks at you. Aaron, you can’t toss him away. It’ll devastate him. It’ll kill him!” Adam stormed out of his room leaving Aaron to ponder what he’d said.

Aaron tossed and turned all night. Deep down he knew that Adam was right, but he couldn’t bring himself to forget what Brian had said the last time they spoke to one another. He really liked Darren and thought that their relationship could blossom into something special, but at the same time he felt guilty - guilty for cheating on Brian, and guilty for possibly crushing Darren in the end. He knew he was only fooling himself - he still loved Brian very, very much. Darren was only a distraction - someone to take his mind off the fact that deep down he was hurting more than ever. Finally, he just gave up on trying to sleep and he loaded up Halo on his Xbox and played the night away.

By the time he went downstairs for breakfast, he looked like hell. His parents were concerned but, after he told them he didn’t want to talk about it, they knew that it wasn’t the time to push it.

Adam for his part was glad to see that his brother was suffering. It was a first step, as far as he was concerned, for he knew his brother and Brian better than either of them did themselves.

At just after ten o’clock, the phone rang.

“Aaron, it’s for you,” his dad said as he handed him the phone.


“Hello, is this Aaron?”

Aaron thought he recognized the voice, but he wasn’t sure from where. When he realized who it was, it sent a chill down his spine. It was Darren’s father. “Hello, Mr. Jacobs.”

“You’re pretty good at recognizing voices, Aaron. I’m impressed.”

“Well I . . .”

“You don’t need to say anything, Aaron. Just hear me out. I think you know what this is about, but it’s not what you think. I really want to thank you for kissing Darren in front of my house last night.”


“I want to thank you. You made it so much easier for us to talk to Darren about something we’d wanted to raise for some time, but just didn’t know how. I know that I wasn’t the most tolerant person when Darren was growing up, but we love our son very much. Anyway, it’s been pretty obvious the past couple of years that Darren’s gay. I mean he’s not exactly very masculine and he endured a lot of teasing in middle school, but he never wanted to talk about it. Even his sister asked us recently if he’s gay. I think Darren is the only one who really thought it wasn’t obvious.”

Aaron thought about it for a moment and realized that it was probably true.

“Anyway, thanks to you, we were finally able to talk frankly to our son and to allay his fears that we would reject him for it. I’m not saying I’m comfortable with him being gay, but after watching him grow up, I realize that he had no choice. He could no more be straight than he could win a college football scholarship. I know that he was born this way and it’s nobody’s fault.

“Aaron, I love my son, which brings me to the real reason for calling you. Darren’s told me about you and about your recent break-up with Brian. Believe me, Aaron, I’ve been there and I know what you’re going through. I also know how Darren feels about you, and I don’t want to see him hurt. Aaron, please promise me that you’ll be gentle with him. Don’t lead him on unless you feel for him the way he feels for you. All I ask is that you not use him as a substitute lover for Brian. If you did that, it would be utterly devastating to him.

“Again, don’t say anything right now, Aaron. Just please think about it.” And with that Mr. Jacobs hung up the phone.

“Who was that?” Aaron’s mom asked.

“Ah, nobody, Mom.” Aaron then ran back upstairs, plopped down onto his bed. Overwhelmed with his thoughts, he fell asleep.

Monday rolled around and Aaron went through his classes, but had a great deal of difficulty paying attention as he kept thinking about his dilemma. The boy he loved wouldn’t speak to him, and the boy he liked could be crushed by his rejection. He didn’t know what to do. When lunch period came around, he headed to the cafeteria, grabbed some food, and headed to his usual table. Aaron had been discussing his dilemma with his friends when Darren appeared out of nowhere and sat down at their table.

“Dude, do you really want to sit here?” Aaron asked.

“Why not? You’re here and were friends . . . at least I think we’re friends. And it’s a free country, isn’t it?”

“But you know this is kinda the ‘gay’ table. I mean everyone else here is gay, and we’re all out. If you sit here, people are gonna talk.”

“So? Now that my dad knows I’m gay, what’s the harm?”

“Aaron, is this the kid you were talking about?” Scott asked.

“Yeah. Scott, this is Darren. Darren, this is Scott.”

“Darren, what I think Aaron is trying to say is that just because your parents know, doesn’t mean you necessarily want the rest of the world to know. This is high school, dude. Rumors fly like wildfire around here.”

“Are you saying I’m not welcome here?”

“Of course not,” Aaron said. “But the way you talked the other night, I didn’t think you were really ready to come out just yet.”

“Aaron, after talking to my folks, I don’t really think that anyone here’s gonna be surprised that I’m gay, do you?” Aaron thought about this for a minute and when no one spoke, Darren continued. “Look, you’re out, and I like you. Perhaps if I’m out, it’ll make it easier for us to be a couple.”

“Ooh, that’s the wrong reason to come out, dude,” Jared said.

“Does it really matter what my reason is? Going back to what I just said, do you really think anyone’s gonna be surprised that I’m gay. I might as well make it official. At least then people won’t be talking behind my back.”

“No, but what they do to your face could be much, much worse than anything you’ve encountered before,” Aaron answered. “You remember when McDonald painted my car pink? You saw what can happen. Once you out yourself, there’s no going back.”

“I know that, Aaron, but I want to come out on my terms . . . not because I’m forced to. So can I please sit here?”

“Of course you can sit here,” Scott replied.

“And I’m gonna join the GSA, too. Speaking of which, Aaron, would you go with me to the GSA Valentine’s dance this Saturday?” Darren asked.

For the second time in the last ten minutes, Aaron nearly fell off his chair. Valentine’s day itself was on Wednesday, only two days away, but the student council had voted to hold the dance on Friday. The GSA chose to hold their own dance on Saturday, separately from the official school dance so that kids who didn’t want to come out could feel safe.

After staring back at Darren for a while, Aaron finally responded, “Gee, I dunno.”

“Aaron, I know you’re not over Brian yet. I know you don’t love me the way you still love Brian, and perhaps you never will, but I love you, Aaron Michael Johnson, and I’m willing to wait. Please just go with me to the dance. It’s not like a real date or anything. I’d like to go and I’d like to go with you.”

Everyone at the table was feeling a bit uncomfortable with this exchange. Finally, Aaron spoke up. “Darren, I’m going through a lot right now. I can’t promise anything, but if you’re willing to deal with the possibility that things might not work out, I’d be happy to go with you to the dance.”

“I know things might not work out . . . believe me, but I’m gonna do everything I can to change your mind about me. I’ll never be Brian, but I’m here and I love you, and I hope that someday you’ll love me, too. Until that day, let’s have fun, and if that day never comes, we’ll still have our memories, and I’ll always love you.” Darren got up and startled the hell out of Aaron when he kissed him on the lips, and then left.

“Damn,” Scott said, “I can’t believe he kissed you in front of everybody. He like went from the closet to center stage.”

“Yeah, in front of everybody,” Aaron repeated as he looked in Brian’s direction, only to find Larry, sitting alone.

Aaron couldn’t help but worry that Brian had seen Darren kiss him. After his conversation with Adam on Saturday night, he was beginning to realize just how fragile Brian was and he wondered if, deep down, Brian still loved him. Knowing that Darren loved him only made things more difficult. He really liked the guy, but he didn’t love him and the last thing he wanted was to see Darren crushed.

That evening when he got home from school, he called the Sandler home and got no answer. He tried calling Brian’s cell phone and still didn’t get an answer, and left a voice mail message. Finally, he tried Larry’s house, but Larry had no idea where Brian was.

The next day in school, Aaron’s anxiety only grew, particularly when lunch came and went and he still didn’t see Brian. Larry was beginning to become worried as well. When Aaron got home that afternoon, he called Brian’s house and there still wasn’t an answer, nor was there on Brian’s cell phone. Finally, he tried June Sandler’s cell phone and got an answer.

“Hello Aaron, it’s good to hear your voice.”

“Hi June. I’m calling because I haven’t been able to reach Brian.”

“Aaron, I think you need to sit down. Are you sitting down?”

“WHAT’S WRONG?” Aaron screamed into the phone, ignoring June’s advice.

“Aaron, last night Brian tried to take his life, and there’s a good chance he may not make it.”


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

27. Truth & Reconciliation

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 27 - Truth and Reconciliation

The events of the next 72 hours were a complete blur. Aaron collapsed to the floor and cried hysterically when he heard the news. Adam heard him fall and got his parents, who eventually coaxed the news out of Aaron. Everyone was shocked. Aaron’s mom called June back and let her know that Aaron was OK, and she found out where Brian was so they could all visit. When they arrived at the same hospital that Aaron and Brian had been in just a year before, June filled them in on the details.

“He’d been hoarding his pain pills for some time. None of us knew he was doing it. He seemed to be doing better since Dr. Stevens started him on Prozac, so we thought he was going to be OK, even though he continued to refuse counseling. He came home early from school yesterday . . . he apparently wheeled himself home . . . and he downed his entire supply of Vicodin, followed by a bottle of scotch. Thank God I’d left work early because we were supposed to go to a dinner engagement last night. If I hadn’t gotten home until my usual time, he’d have already been dead.

“As it was, he was barely breathing when I found him. We got him here right away, but it was too late to pump his stomach. They were able to reverse the effects of the narcotics and got him on a ventilator and stabilized him. He’s breathing on his own now and apparently, there’s no brain damage. The problem is his liver.

“In addition to a narcotic, Vicodin contains Tylenol. Brian consumed a toxic dose and has extensive liver damage. They tell me that there’s at best a fifty percent chance that he’ll make it. It could be days before we know for sure. They’ve put him at the top of the transplant list, but the chance of finding a match before he dies is close to zero.” June and Alan were in tears as she said this, as was everyone else. She reached out and hugged Aaron and the two of them embraced for several minutes.

“Couldn’t you or Alan donate part of your liver to Brian?” Aaron asked. “I think I read something about that recently.”

“Aaron,” June answered, “There’s no easy way to tell you this, but Brian’s adopted.”

“What? Why didn’t Brian tell me?”

“Because he doesn’t know. We’d always planned to tell him when he was ‘old enough’ to understand, but the longer we waited, the harder it became. I’m sorry, Aaron,” June said as a tears stared to escape her eyes. “I know you probably feel betrayed, but Brian was a miracle baby for us. We’d been trying to have a child for so long and when our attorney called with the news about Brian being available, we were ecstatic. We gave him all the love we would have given him if he’d been our own child.”

“I know you did, June,” Aaron said in reply. “No parents could have been more loving to Brian than you were, and I love you for it. When he comes out of this, I think you should tell him, but I forgive you.” Aaron once again hugged June with all his might, and then he did the same with Alan.

After what seemed like several minutes lost in thought, Aaron asked, “June, can I go see him?”

“Yes, Aaron, I think he’d like that. They only allow two visitors at a time into the ICU and only for fifteen minutes at a time. I’ll take you to see him in a half-hour.”

Aaron thought he’d composed himself rather well when it came time to see Brian, but he wasn’t prepared for what he saw. As they entered the room, Brian was lying there staring up at the ceiling. He seemed unemotional as his mother took his hand. His skin and the whites of his eyes were yellow.

“Brian, I’ve brought someone here to see you. Aaron’s here.”


“Because he really wants to see you.”

Brian turned his head toward Aaron and stared blankly at him. “Came to see the dead man, huh?”

Aaron nearly lost it. “Brian, don’t talk like that. You’re gonna live. You’ve gotta live!”

“Why? Why should I live? I’ve lost everything that meant anything to me. Aaron, this is what I want. I can’t live this way. I’ll be gone soon, Aaron. You need to get on with your life. You and Darren’ll make a good couple.”

“Brian, I don’t want Darren. I want you.”

“Get off it, Aaron! I’m dying! You can’t have me! So why don’t you just get the fuck out of here and leave me alone! Go back to your lover boy!”

“Brian, don’t tell me that your seeing me with Darren didn’t have something to do with this. I know you didn’t mean what you said to me the last time we saw each other. I know you still love me just as I love you. Seeing Darren and me together must have really hurt!”

“Well, it didn’t.”

“Do you take me for a fool? You went home and took the pills right after you saw Darren kiss me. I know you still love me. You can’t leave me, Brian!”

“Aaron, don’t you see? The boy you fell in love with no longer exists. He died a year ago. The boy you think you love is a good-for-nothing cripple who can’t walk, who can’t fuck and who certainly can’t give you what you need.”


“But it’s the truth. In a way, my being gone will clear the way for you. You’ll be able to get on with your life and to have someone who’s complete. Someone like Darren.”

Aaron leaned forward and pushed his lips against Brian’s. The taste was terrible - like ammonia, but he didn’t care. Slowly and sensually, Aaron sucked Brian’s lips and pressed forward with his tongue. Brian resisted, determined to have his way, but then his emotions started to melt and he let Aaron’s tongue invade his mouth. Resigned and now eager, Brian couldn’t help but kiss back as the one he truly loved, gave of himself - selflessly.

Aaron broke the kiss and said, “I’m not giving up on you, Brian Sandler. You’re a special person and no-one can replace you in my life. Darren and I don’t even like the same things. With you and me, it was love at first sight. Don’t deny it. We were made for each other. How often does that happen? Most people never have what we had. I don’t care if you’re in a wheelchair. I don’t care if you can’t feel your nipples . . .” Aaron reached down and tweaked Brian’s right nipple, “and I don’t care if we never have sex again. I just love being with you, and I’ve missed that terribly.”

“Oh God Aaron, would you do that again?”

“Do what?”

“Touch my nipples.”

Aaron reached down and tweaked both of Brian’s nipples.

“Aaron, I felt that! It wasn’t as strong as it used to be, but I definitely felt it!” Both boys were in tears now. Aaron leaned over and pressed his lips against Brian’s and slowly started to kiss him once again. The kiss became increasingly intense as they pushed their tongues into each other’s eager mouths.

“Brian, don’t leave me, man. I need you. I can’t live without you. I love you. Please don’t leave me.” Tears continued to roll down Aaron’s cheeks as he spoke.

“I’m so, so sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I love you.” Brian started crying hysterically as he said that and then both boys held each other as they sobbed.

“Aaron, I meant what I said about you having to move on. Maybe I made a mistake, but it was my mistake to make and I’m probably gonna die. I’m so sorry, but what’s done is done. Promise me, Aaron, that you’ll get on with your life. Maybe it won’t be with Darren, but for me, find someone else to be the love of your life.”

“I’ll make that promise under one condition, my love. Promise me that you’ll fight to live. I hope and pray it’s not too late, but the only way you’ll pull through is if you want to. Promise me you won’t give up . . . that you’ll fight for life until you take your last breath. Do that for me and I’ll keep my promise to you.

“You still want to be with me, even though I can’t use my dick?”

“I’d be with you, even if it fell off. I’d be with you, even if it meant mine would fall off. I love you, Brian. Remember what I said before . . . sex is just the icing on the cake. Besides, you do still have your mouth . . . and a mighty incredible cock-sucking mouth it is!” Remembering he wasn’t alone, Aaron turned his head and sheepishly added, “Sorry June.”

“That’s OK, Aaron. While I might not approve of the language, they’re words of love and wisdom.”

Brian started sobbing hysterically again. “I’m so, so sorry. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to do this. I shoulda died in the accident. I shoulda died back then. Why? Why did this have to happen to me? Why did we have to rush like that, just to have a cheap fuck?”

“It wasn’t for a cheap fuck, Brian. We’d been waiting for months. We wanted to make love . . . real love in the most intimate way possible. Yeah, we were stupid. Yes, I made a mistake, too. I know I’ve said it before, but I’d give anything to trade places with you, even now. Even with all that’s happened. This isn’t your fault, Brian. We were both at the wrong place at the wrong time and you got the raw end of the stick, but the one thing that’s made it all tolerable is that we have each other. Together we can get through this. With sheer will and my love, you’re gonna pull through this. You’re gonna make it, baby.”

“I know, Aaron. At least I’ll try.”

The boys once again embraced, and then it was time for Aaron and June to leave. Once they returned to the waiting area, June said, “Thank you Aaron. Thank you for bringing Brian out of his shell. I think his chances just got a whole lot better.”

“Oh God, I hope you’re right, June.”

“But if he doesn’t make it, I want you to stick to your promise, and from now on, please don’t be a stranger. I know you couldn’t keep in touch with us after Brian rejected you . . . that it hurt too much . . . but we’ve missed you terribly. It would be painful to lose a son, but unbearable to lose two.”

The gravity of what June Sandler was telling him slowly sunk in. He hugged her tightly and they both cried.

Aaron spent the night at the hospital, but by morning, Brian’s condition had only worsened. The doctors started talking to his parents about whether or not they would want him to go back on a ventilator if his breathing became labored, and if they would want him resuscitated if his heart stopped. Aaron didn’t want to hear any of this. He went to the hospital’s chapel and did something he hadn’t done in a long time - he prayed.

By nightfall on Wednesday, Brian was barely coherent. He didn’t recognize his parents, nor Aaron, Adam, or Larry when they came to visit him. To Aaron it was evident that his best friend, the love of his life, the one he cared about more than life itself, was dying.

In desperation he cried out, “Brian, don’t leave me! Please, Brian. Fight! Fight for me! Fight for us!” Although Brian didn’t seem to respond, Aaron clearly saw a solitary tear stream out of Brian’s right eye. He wiped the tear with his hand and reached down and kissed his beloved on the forehead. “Goodnight, my love. I’ll be here for you until you wake.”

Aaron couldn’t sleep that night and he again stayed at the hospital. He hoped against all hope that Brian would recover, but somehow knew that he wouldn’t. He needed to be there for Brian when he died, if nothing else.

At around two AM, one of the residents came out to the waiting room and headed straight for them. Aaron knew what this must mean - the perfect boy - the love of his life - was gone. Time seemed to slow down as the resident approached. He could see every feature of her face. The distant look of someone who had seen death many times before. The expressionless look of someone who hadn’t been to sleep in more than a day.

But as she approached, Aaron noticed something else - it was subtle, but she was smiling. Alan and June were asleep, so she approached Aaron first. She stooped down to his level and said quietly, “Your friend’s awake, and he wants to see you. He wants to see all of you.”

“I thought that only two of us could see him at a time.”

“I think we can make an exception tonight.”

Aaron woke the Sandlers and the resident led all three of them to Brian’s bedside. When they walked into his room, Brian looked more wan than ever, but his eyes were open and his breathing was regular.

“Hi Mom, Dad. Hey Aaron. I’m really sorry about putting you through all of this. I’m not out of the woods yet by any means, but when they check my labs in the morning, they’re gonna be better. I just know it. I can feel it. I’m not gonna give up and die. Aaron, I love you for your persistence, especially after I shut you out the way I did. I lied to you . . . I never stopped loving you . . . but I just didn’t feel it was fair for you to be stuck with me, especially after things got worse and the surgery seemed to fail.”

Aaron started to speak, but Brian shushed him.

“I know now that it was up to you . . . not me . . . to decide what was fair, but I just couldn’t see it at the time. For some reason, I thought a little hurt now would be better than a lot of hurt later. Boy was I wrong. Seeing you here showed me that there was no way to get around a lot of hurt. Most of all, however, I know now that Dr. Stevens was right. I still haven’t faced up to my loss, and then when I did, I ended up dealing with it by filling my stomach with Vicodin.”

“Brian, I’m proud of you. Yes, Dr. Stevens was right. You can’t sidestep your grief. You have to get through it . . . to live through it. Ending your life is no way to end your grief. But you have me, and you have your wonderful, loving parents, and you have Larry, and Adam, and even Darren, and the Jazz Ensemble, and the GSA to help you get through this. We’re all here to help.”

“I feel like I’m at the bottom of a deep dark hole with no way to climb out. You’ve kept trying to throw me a ladder and I just kept throwing it away. When I recover . . . and I’m gonna recover . . . I’ll get counseling. We’ll get counseling. We’ll go together. I don’t ever want to be apart again.”

“That’s it, baby. Grab the ladder, and we’ll never, ever be apart again.”

Both boys were in tears as they embraced and then kissed each other for the longest time. They finally pulled apart long enough to let Brian’s parents hug and kiss him before they all were shooed out of the ICU.

True to Brian’s word, his labs did indeed improve, but it was days before he was stable enough to move out of intensive care and it took nearly a week of intensive rehab before he was strong enough to move to the psychiatric unit.

As much as everyone wanted Brian to go home, they all agreed he needed to get past his suicide attempt before he could leave the hospital. With luck, he might be able to go home in a week, but more likely a month, given the extent to which he’d nearly succeeded.

In the initial days of Brian’s recovery, Aaron faced yet another major challenge. Although Darren was well aware of Brian’s suicide attempt and was sympathetic to what Aaron was going through, he continued to hold out hope that Aaron could still be his boyfriend. Aaron told Darren flat out that he loved Brian and that they would soon be together again, but Darren was too infatuated to hear any of it. Aaron tried to get out of going to the GSA Valentine dance with him, but Darren was steadfast - a promise was a promise, he reminded Aaron.

Aaron spoke to Brian about his dilemma, and Brian told him he should go. Brian trusted Aaron implicitly and knew nothing would happen at the dance. “Aaron, I want you to go to the dance. Just because I’m still in the hospital doesn’t mean you shouldn’t go out and have a good time. Don’t think of it as a date with Darren. You’re just going out to a party to be with your closest friends.” Against his better judgement, Aaron decided to go ahead with it.

The night of the dance, Aaron picked Darren up at his home. He had to admit that Darren looked good that night - really pretty sexy - and it annoyed him that he felt himself being aroused. During the drive over, Darren put his hand on Aaron’s thigh and slid it up and over his dick.

“And you tried to tell me you don’t love me,” Darren said.

“Darren, there’s a big difference between love and lust. I learned that lesson a while ago. Lust is short-lived and seldom lasts. Love is what matters. I may be physically aroused by you, but Brian is the love of my life and there’s nothing you can do to change that. You really need to ask yourself if you really love me, or you lust after me. You know we really don’t have a lot in common.”

Darren didn’t say anything in response to this and Aaron hoped that he was thinking about what he’d said. He hoped and prayed that Darren wasn’t taking it the wrong way. One gay teenage attempted suicide was more than enough for him to handle in this lifetime.

When they got to the school, Darren acted clingy with Aaron, not letting him out of his sight. This didn’t look good and Aaron was really getting worried. He gravitated to Scott and some of his friends in the hope of getting some relief from Darren. Everyone asked him how Brian was doing and he was pleased to tell them that he was officially out of the woods.

After a while, a young kid - a freshman that Aaron knew from his participation in other GSA functions - came up to the group and said, “Hey guys, ’sup?”

“Hey, Jeff.” Darren said. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m on the planning committee for the dance.”

“You mean you’re a member?”

“Hell yeah, I’m a member. I joined the GSA as soon as I started high school.”

“You mean you’re gay?” Darren asked.

“’Course I’m gay. I’ve been out since middle school, but we moved the summer before sixth grade, so maybe you didn’t know.”

“Jeff, I never suspected you were gay. I mean, you were always surrounded by girls, and you’re so damn cute. I just thought you were out of reach. I’ve had a major crush on you since, well, forever . . . I just never thought it could happen between us.”

Jeff laughed aloud and said, “It’s really ironic.” He turned to address the rest of the group. “I developed a major crush on Darren in fifth grade. That’s what made me realize I was gay, but I was too afraid to approach him. By the time I came to terms with who I was, my parents had told me we were moving, and that meant going to a different middle school than Darren. And then I got sick, so I kind of lost track of him.”

“What do you mean you got sick, Jeff?” Aaron asked.

“I got cancer. Osteogenic sarcoma of my right femur. That’s the thigh bone. They had to amputate my entire right leg.”

“Wow!” Darren said. “I guess that explains why you walk with a slight limp, but I would have never known.”

“I dance pretty good, too,” Jeff added. “They had to rebuild my thigh so they could even fit me with an artificial leg. I’ve got an internal prosthesis in the form of an artificial hip joint, as well as an external one in the form of an artificial leg.”

“That’s way cool, Jeff. I mean, it’s terrible you had to go through all that, but it’s cool that they were able to fix you up like that, and that you can walk and dance and everything.”

“Hey, you wanna dance right now?” Jeff asked Darren.

“Sure,” Darren answered.

As Jeff and Darren moved to the dance floor, Aaron couldn’t help but marvel at how fluidly Jeff moved, but when he started dancing, everyone was truly amazed at what Jeff was able to do. “Man, would you look at Jeff tearing up the floor? He’s fantastic! He’s better than me, and I have two good legs.”

“You’re not kidding, Aaron,” Scott added.

“Thanks for the vote of confidence.”

“I didn’t mean it that way, Aaron, but if the foo shits . . . “

Aaron punched Scott lightly in the shoulder in retaliation.

“Hey, don’t go beating up my boyfriend,” Jared interjected as the three of them laughed.

Darren and Jeff danced to one more fast song, and then Ben Folds’ The Luckiest came on. Feeling funny about dancing to a slow song just yet, they returned to the group of boys they’d been talking to, but Darren had other plans. He approached Aaron, fully intending to ask him to dance, but then he noticed that Aaron was crying.

“Aaron, are you alright?” Darren asked.

“Yes . . . I mean, no, not really. I’m sorry, Darren, I don’t want to be a downer, but this is the song Brian and I danced to when we came out. It was at the GSA Holiday dance a year ago that Brian and I first danced together. This is our song. We just swayed slowly to the music, feeling our love flow between us. We kissed at the end of the song. Boy did we kiss. I’ll never forget that night. . . . I’ll have that memory for the rest of my life. Scarcely a month later, we were in the accident. I walked away, and Brian didn’t.

“A month ago, I was in such pain. I thought I’d lost Brian for good . . . but then I found out what it would mean to really lose him. We may never be able to dance the way we danced that night, but I’m so grateful that I have Brian back. Even now, I miss him so much, my gut aches. . . . God, I wish he were here.”

Darren looked up at Aaron with tears in his own eyes. “You’ll never be mine, will you Aaron?”

“No, Darren, I won’t. I love Brian with all my heart. Don’t get me wrong . . . you’re a great kid . . . but my heart belongs to Brian. Somehow, we were made for each other.”

“I understand, Aaron . . . really, I do. I may always love you in a way, but I know now I’ll have to move on. I hope you’ll always think of me as your friend.”

“Of course you’ll always be my friend, Darren. A close friend.”

Aaron drew Darren up into his arms and they hugged each other tightly as they cried tears for a love lost, and a love regained. As they pulled apart, Aaron said, “You know, Darren, I think Jeff still has a bit of a crush on you.”

“You know, Aaron, I think you may be right . . . and I know I still have a crush on him. Did you see how he danced? He’s awesome.”

“Yeah, he is, Darren.”

On the way home, Aaron was pleased when Darren apologized for hitting on him so strongly, and actually asked for pointers on building a relationship with Jeff.

Brian ended up spending less than two weeks in the psych unit and was then discharged home and into an outpatient program.

Aaron had one great pleasure the day Brian returned from the hospital - returning the ID bracelet to Brian.

“I never could have given it to anyone else. Like it says on the back, ‘Yours Always’. I’ve been holding onto it, waiting for the day you returned to me,” Aaron said as he handed the bracelet back to Brian. “You’re stuck with me, Babe.”

“This time, you put it on me. This time, I promise it’s forever,” Brian said. “I swear, I’ll never leave you again. I can’t live without you. I’ll never again doubt your love. I’ll always be yours and you’re forever mine.”

“It’s always has been forever sweetheart,” Aaron said as he clicked the clasp shut. “Like they say, ’til death do us part, my man.” Aaron suddenly realized what he’d said and added, “Er . . . but let’s put the death thing off ’til we’re at least eighty.”

“Amen to that,” Brian said with a smile before he leaned forward, puckered his lips and closed his eyes, begging Aaron to lean down and kiss him. Aaron didn’t need to be coerced.


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

28. Recovery

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 28 - Recovery

“What do you mean I’m adopted?”

“Honey,” June continued, “When your father and I were first married, we always assumed we’d have children. To us, having children was a big part of what marriage is all about. It was part of being Christian . . . our duty to God . . . but even more, it was about sharing our love with someone who was a part of us.

“After two years of trying, we finally started to realize it wasn’t going to happen on its own. But when the doctor told us we wouldn’t be able to have children . . . that even modern medicine couldn’t give us a child, we were devastated.”

“So we turned to God,” Alan continued, “and we prayed he would deliver us a miracle baby. Plus we talked to our lawyer,” he added with a chuckle.

“We talked about adopting an unwanted child . . . a crack baby, or maybe a child of mixed race, but then fate intervened,” June added.

“Our lawyer had a client whose unmarried daughter was pregnant. His clients were Evangelist Christians,” Alan had an amused expression on his face as he said this, “and they wanted to be sure their grandchild went to a good Christian family.”

“In other words, they didn’t want their fellow ‘Christians’ to know their daughter had had sex outside of marriage,” Brian interjected.

Jim nodded. “They probably wanted their daughter to finish high school and go to college without the added burden of raising a child.”

“If that’d been the case, they would’ve raised the child themselves,” Brian insisted, but then he started laughing hysterically. Alan and June looked at each other with puzzled looks on their faces as Brian continued to laugh. Finally, Brian calmed down and continued. “It’s funny, you know. God chose to give this good ‘Christian’ family a gay kid . . . and one who ended up in a wheelchair at that!”

“You could have said the same thing about your father and me, but in the end it was you that changed us,” June said with a chuckle.

“And for the better,” Alan added, smiling.

Brian sat still for several minutes with a pensive look on his face. His parents felt increasingly uncomfortable as the silence continued.

Finally, Brian said, “You could have told me, you know.”

“We know that now, Brian,” Alan replied. “At first we kept waiting for you to grow older . . . to be old enough to understand. We thought it would get easier with time, but the longer we put it off, the harder it became.”

“This is gonna take a little getting used to . . . a bit like getting used to your being gay . . . or bi, Dad . . . but there’s a difference. I can understand why you didn’t want me or Mom to know about that . . . “

“I didn’t want even myself to know about it, Brian.”

“Yeah, I understand that, Dad, but why didn’t you want me to know I was adopted? Mom, why?”

“Because we didn’t want you to feel different. We didn’t want you to think we loved you any less. . . .”

“I know you don’t love me any less. If nothing else, what happened after the accident has proved it. The only time I doubted your love . . . was when you rejected my sexuality. But even then, I knew down deep you did what you did because you loved me. So what makes you think knowing I was adopted would have made me doubt your love?”

“There’s no good answer for that, Brian. We could make up excuses, but they’d just be excuses. Parents are human, too, and we make mistakes. . . . ”

“And even when you know you should, you sometimes don’t give your children the trust they deserve,” Alan added.

After a few more minutes of silence, Brian spoke. “I guess all I can say is I’m disappointed in you guys. You underestimated me once again. . . . “

“I know we did,” Alan interjected.

“I’m gay, I’m a paraplegic, and now I’m adopted? Just when I think I’ve begun to accept who I am, something else comes along to shake the foundation of my world . . . but I guess I’d better get used to it, huh? That’s kind of what life’s all about, isn’t it, Dad?”

“Son, that’s one of the most adult things I’ve heard from anyone, let alone a fifteen-year-old boy. I’m really very proud of you. . . . “

“Even though I tried to kill myself? I feel so ashamed about that . . . “

“That was the depression, Brian. That wasn’t you.”

“Dad, Mom, I may be disappointed, but I forgive you. And I love you. You guys and Aaron mean more to me than anyone or anything in the world. I don’t care that I’m adopted. They say that blood is thicker than water, but nothing is stronger than love.”

All three of the Sandlers had tears running down their cheeks as Brian said this. They ended up in a group hug, Brian’s wheelchair and all.

Later that evening, Aaron arrived to spend the night. They rarely had sex on a school night - nothing more than a quick jerk-off or quick suck anyway - but since it was the night before Aaron’s seventeenth birthday, and since it was Brian’s first night home since being discharged from the psych unit, and since it was a bowel program night for Brian, and since the real birthday celebration wouldn’t be until Friday night - they decided to start celebrating a day early. Aaron asked Brian if his parents had talked to him.

“You knew they were gonna talk to me about my being adopted?”

“I kinda made them promise to.”

“But how did you know about it? Why did they tell you when they didn’t tell me?”

“I asked your mom why she or your dad couldn’t be donors for a liver transplant.”

“They were gonna donate their livers to me?” Brian said with a smile on his face.

“Of course. They would’ve if they could’ve. Part of their livers, anyway. You know that.”

“Yeah,” Brian responded as his smile broadened, “beyond any doubt.”

“Do you think you’ll want to meet your birth mother?”

Brian thought for a few moments, and then answered his boyfriend. “Maybe someday, but not now. Even if she’s no longer an evangelist, if she ever really was, I think she should meet her gay son when he’s an adult. And besides, I’m not ready to deal with her rejection. Maybe I’m being paranoid, but I’m in no hurry to meet her.”

“I can understand that.”

“Aaron, does it bother you that I’m adopted?” Brian asked as a slight frown replaced his smile.

“Sweetheart, I’d love you if you were an alien from outer space whose ship crash-landed on Earth. No matter what, you’ll always be my Superman.”

“Even Superman couldn’t walk.”

“Christopher Reeves may have been a quadriplegic, but no one had more spirit . . . no one except you.”

The boys’ lips met in a passionate kiss. Aaron pulled away and said, “We’d better get you ready for bed before we go any further.”

Brian eagerly wheeled himself into his bathroom, and Aaron followed. Before long, they were both sprawled out naked, in Brian’s bed. They resumed their passionate kissing, but when Aaron kept rubbing Brian’s nipples, it excited Brian to new extremes.

Brian’s sensation had been returning rapidly and he now had nearly full sensation of his nipples, which were just within his new zone of injury. Although having some loss of feeling meant he couldn’t have nipple rings, at least according to Dr. Stevens, his nipples actually felt more sensitive than ever, even without the rings.

As Aaron kissed Brian and stroked his nipples, it brought Brian to a nearly continuous state of arousal. Brian couldn’t take it any more and he broke the kiss and started licking Aaron’s ear, sticking his tongue inside and then nibbling at his ear stud. As Aaron adjusted his position, Brian licked his way down Aaron’s neck and chest and very gently licked around Aaron’s nipple rings, sending him into a state of ecstasy. Aaron repositioned himself so that Brian could continue kissing and licking his way down Aaron’s abdomen, but Brian bypassed Aaron’s groin in favor of his left thigh.

Brian continued up the other side, but when he got to Aaron’s groin, he instead pushed Aaron’s legs into the air and over his shoulders and started rimming him. Brian pushed his tongue into Aaron’s hole, causing him to yelp with pleasure. He then lubed his fingers and stuck two fingers into Aaron, sliding them in and out and prodding his prostate. Aaron was now leaking precum furiously. Brian licked one and then the other of Aaron’s balls, and then he licked his way up the sensitive underside of Aaron’s dick, spending extra time concentrating his wiggling tongue at the inverted V just below the mushroom head, lapping up Aaron’s delicious nectar. It drove Aaron crazy.

Brian engulfed Aaron’s dick and went down on it, all the way to the base, and applied furious suction as he slowly withdrew. He bobbed up and down on Aaron for several minutes - not an easy feat, given the limited use he had of his trunk muscles - and Aaron started thrusting on his own, fucking Brian’s face as Brian finger-fucked his ass. When Aaron appeared to be close, Brian teased him by going back to work on his balls and slowing down his finger action. After a while, he went back to work on Aaron’s dick, only to taunt him once again when he appeared to be close.

“Please, Brian, I have to cum!”

Brian didn’t need any more prompting. He went furiously back to work on Aaron’s dick and prostate and soon was treated to seven strong jets of Aaron’s sweet nectar. It was a taste he could never get enough of. Brian’s emotions peaked when he thought of his happiness and that he’d nearly thrown it all away!

As he came down from his orgasm, Aaron reveled at the love they shared. To think he’d nearly lost him. He still didn’t believe in prayer, but he couldn’t help but wonder if the time he’d spent in the hospital chapel had made the difference. Thank God, or whoever - he was the luckiest boy alive.

“Man, Aaron, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you come so strong!”

“No one can do to me what you do to me, babe. I’ve been waiting a long, long time to feel your mouth on my dick once again.”

“Aaron, I’m so, so sorry for what I did to you. It breaks my heart to think of the torment I put you through.”

“But that wasn’t the real ‘you’, Brian. I’ve forgiven you more than a hundred times over. Just having you here is the best birthday present I could ever wish for.”

The boys passionately kissed each other and fell asleep in each other’s arms.

Far too soon, it was morning. Brian heard the alarm go off and when Aaron failed to respond to it, he shook him gently and said, “Happy birthday, my love.”

Aaron slowly opened his eyes, trying to adjust to the glare of sunlight coming through Brian’s bedroom window. “What time is it?”

“A little after six.”

“Oh shit! I guess we need to get ready for school. Didn’t the alarm go off?”

“Yeah, but you slept right through it. I guess the fun we had last night left you a little worn out, lover boy.”

When Aaron just seemed to stare off into space, Brian added, “C’mon, Aaron! We’re gonna be late for school.”

Brian’s shouting brought Aaron out of his reverie. Yeah, last night had been great, but he had a busy day ahead that included a test in Calculus. He knew he’d ace it, but he hadn’t had much sleep and that left him a little concerned. Reluctantly, he got himself out of bed as Brian got onto his shower chair. “Guess I better shower this morning, huh?”

“Unless you want everyone to know what we were up to last night,” Aaron said with a wink. “As it is, everyone’s gonna be staring at you today, after what happened and all.”

“You would have to bring that up.”

“Don’t worry about it, babe. I’ll be there by your side, and when I can’t be, Larry and Adam and the Jazz Ensemble and everyone in the GSA will be watching out for you.”

“You’re right, Aaron. I’m lucky to have so many friends . . . friends who care about me. How could I ever have taken them for granted?”

Aaron and Brian got into the large shower stall together and Aaron helped Brian get himself clean - something Brian was fully capable of doing himself otherwise - just to help save a little time. The boys took turns hogging the mirror as Brian had just started shaving and Aaron was now shaving every day. Aaron hated to see the cute band of peach fuzz above Brian’s lip go, but the love of his life was growing up and he wouldn’t have it any other way.”

The school day went fairly quickly and Aaron needn’t have worried about his Calculus test - he could have solved the problems in his sleep.

He met up with Brian at lunch. They sat at a large table with Larry, Chad, Sharon, Jackie, Scott and Jared, and two newer additions - Darren and Jeff. Aaron leaned down and gently kissed Brian on the lips as he prepared to sit down. He remembered a time when this used to get snickers from the nearby tables, but everyone had long ago learned that if they had a problem with Aaron and Brian’s relationship, they’d better keep it to themselves.

As he sat down, he looked over at Larry and Chad and asked, “How’s it goin’, straight men?”

“Pretty well, gay man.” Larry responded. “Having a happy birthday?”

“So far. So you and Gail coming to the party tomorrow night?”

“Wouldn’t miss it for anything.”

Aaron and Brian really treasured having a straight friend like Larry who could feel comfortable sitting at a table of gay boys and girls. Sure, there were always rumors, but Larry just brushed them off and truly didn’t seem to care. After his breakup with Cindy, Larry went through a bit of a slump, but then he met Gail while taking a summer job at the local Cineplex and they’d been inseparable ever since. Larry ate with his best friends, who just happened to be gay, because Gail had a different lunch period. Anyone who might have suspected Larry was gay, however, would have quickly realized otherwise after seeing Larry and Gail during one of their frequent make-out sessions in the school’s halls.

Chad was a bit more of a question mark. He said he was straight, but no one had ever seen him date. Adam, now himself a member of the Jazz ensemble as a trumpet player, but who had a different lunch period, swore that Chad was gay. Aaron and Brian weren’t so sure. The bottom line, as far as they were concerned, was that it was Chad’s business and if he was gay, he could come out to them if and when he was ready. Either way, they would provide any support they could as friends.

Aaron spent his birthday evening with his parents and brother. After the cake and ice cream, it was time for presents. Aaron had no idea what to expect - nothing could compare with the car his parents got him last year.

Adam went first, handing Aaron a small, flat box. Aaron tore into the wrapping paper and opened the box, finding a framed picture of him and Brian marching at the peace rally in December of 2005.

“Adam, where did you get this?” Aaron couldn’t remembering ever seeing a picture of the two of them together at the rally other than the brief spot he’d seen on the local news.

“It took a lot of doing. I figured that if the news crews were there, there were also probably some news photographers there as well. It took me weeks of phone calls to finally track down someone who still had a copy on their hard drive, but I did it.”

“Adam, that means so much more to me than any amount of money you could have spent. This . . . this . . .” Aaron started to cry. “This picture means so much to me. That was such a special time in my life. I cherish those memories . . . and . . . and I have so few pictures from before . . .” Aaron trailed off and started to cry again thinking of the accident that left Brian paraplegic. He finally continued, “Adam, you are one hell of a brother.” And with that he threw his arms around his brother and hugged him tightly.

Next it was his parents’ turn. They handed him an envelope. Aaron’s curiosity was more than a bit piqued - what could fit in a flat envelope. “Actually, this is to both you and Brian from his parents and from us.” Now Aaron was really curious. He opened the envelope and found inside a pair of airline tickets to Orlando, made out in both Aaron and Brian’s names. They were for the week of the upcoming spring break.

“What the . . .”

“Well, it’s been years since you went to Disney World, and Brian has never been. Disney is the most accessible theme park in the world and we all thought that you and Brian might like taking a vacation together . . . just the two of you. You’ll be staying at the Contemporary Resort in an accessible room and your package includes everything . . . theme park admissions, Pleasure Island . . . the works!” Jim announced with a certain pride.

“Mom, Dad, this is amazing. It musta cost you all a fortune!”

“After all you and Brian have been through, you boys deserve this. Let this be the first of many happy times together,” Ruth added, smiling.

Aaron threw his arms around his mother and then his father and gave them both a hug. “You’re the best mom and dad a guy could ever have.”

The birthday party Aaron had with his and Brian’s friends was almost anticlimactic for Aaron. He had a great time and everyone got Aaron nice gifts, but nothing could compare with the gift their parents had gotten them. That it was at Disney World was almost irrelevant - sure, they’d have fun, but they intended to have ‘fun’ as well. One full week without parental supervision, living in the lap of luxury. What could be better?

For Brian, however, the party was as much a welcome home party for him as it was a birthday party for Aaron. All of his friends were there, including the members of the Jazz Ensemble. Everyone went out of their way to talk to him and to tell him that they’d missed him. There were plenty of hugs and tears to go around.

After all of Aaron’s presents had been opened, Brian was surprised to see that there was still a small stack of presents left over.

“Welcome home, sweetheart,” Aaron said as he handed the first present to Brian. Brian was flabbergasted. All the extra presents were for him. First, there were several rare bootleg CD’s of some of his favorite jazz musicians from Sharon, Adam and Gail. Next up was a box of “Magic Bullet” suppositories, to help speed up his bowel care. This gag gift could only have come from Larry. Jared, Darren and Jeff got him an iTunes gift card.

That left a very large box, with an attached card signed by all the members of the Jazz ensemble. When Brian opened the box, he was beside himself. Tears started to stream down his face as he said, “I can’t believe you guys did this.” Brian opened the case and pulled out the electric guitar, looking at its highly polished finish. He lovingly caressed the strings as he continued. “Guys, this is . . . this is amazing. This is . . . I can’t believe you all spent this much money. You all must have kicked in fifty bucks or more a piece.”

“Well, one of us contributed a lot more than the others. A lot more. I’ll give you one guess who that was.”

Brian turned around to give his boyfriend a hug, but found that he and his brother had disappeared. They soon reemerged, carrying a brand new amplifier to use with his guitars. After a brief set-up, Brian was plugged in and ready to go. He started out playing Manhã De Carnaval, and after the first verse, started singing along as he played.

A day in the life of a fool
A sad and a long, lonely day
I walk the avenue
And hope I run into
The welcome sight of you coming my way

I'll stop just across from your door
But, you're never home anymore
So there, in my room
And there, in my gloom
I'll cry, tears of good-bye

Till you come back to me
That's the way it will be
Everyday in the life of a fool.

“Brian, that was beautiful. You have the voice of an angel tonight.” Aaron had heard Brian sing before, but never with such passion.

“I was such a fool, Aaron. I had the best, most loving boyfriend in the world, and yet I pushed you away. All that time I really was crying ‘tears of goodbye.’ Once again, you saved my life.”

Moved to tears himself, Aaron leaned over and kissed his boyfriend with renewed passion. Their kiss was interrupted when they heard the unmistakable sound of Crocodile Rock coming from the piano. They looked up to see Larry, banging on the keys. Brian started playing along on his guitar and Jackie started singing, “I remember when rock was young . . .” Soon, everyone was joining in on the chorus.

After that, everyone sang song after song, with Larry tearing up the piano keyboard and Brian smoking away at his new guitar. Before long, it was one A.M. and everyone was wondering what had happened to the time.

For Aaron, it was a memorable birthday party, but for Brian, it was particularly meaningful. He finally realized how many close friends he had and that he was truly loved. It didn’t matter that he was in a wheelchair. It didn’t matter that he was gay. To his friends he was just Brian Sandler, a remarkable young man.

After the night of the party, their activities and school work kept them very busy and, before they knew it, spring break was upon them and it was time to head to the airport.

Their parents had arranged for a limo to take them to and from the airports at both ends, making things much simpler for them. Check-in at the airport was a new experience for the boys. They had both flown many times in their short lives, but Brian had never traveled on his own before, particularly as a paraplegic. He hated to check his wheelchair, but he couldn’t exactly take it on the plane with him. The frustrating thing is that the airline insisted on transporting him in one of their wheelchairs through security and to the gate. It was a rickety old wheelchair that his great-grandparents might have used, but the real indignity was in being pushed. He was perfectly capable of propelling it himself, but regulations required that he be escorted. When it came time to board, the airline brought out a very narrow chair with small wheels that could only be pushed by an attendant. It was designed to fit down the airplane’s narrow aisles.

The boys’ parents had cashed in their frequent flier miles so that the boys could sit in first class - something they hadn’t realized until they were taken to their seats. “Wow, this can’t be right.” Aaron said as he walked behind the attendant who was pushing Brian. “But I’m not complaining!” He slid into the window seat as Brian transferred into the aisle seat next to him. “This is gonna be sooo cool!”

“The best, my boy. The best!” Brian reached over and took Aaron’s hand in his. The attendant who had brought Brian onboard smiled at them and the male attendant for the first class cabin winked at them. The flight down was smooth and the boys enjoyed the doting attention they received. Aaron attempted to order a beer, but when the flight attendant respectfully asked him if he was really twenty-one, he said, “Ah, never mind.”

“Four more fuckin’ years.” Aaron said as he turned to Brian.

“But it’s not like you haven’t had beer before.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“And you don’t even like beer.”

“Yeah, I know. But it’s the freedom. Just knowing I can get it freely if I want it.”

“There’s only one thing I want.” Brian said as he put his hand on Aaron’s.

A young boy of perhaps ten or eleven, who was sitting in the aisle seat directly next to Brian, stared at the two of them as they continued to hold hands. His mother suddenly noticed and whispered something in his ear. The boy then said, “but they’re both guys, Mom. Does that mean they’re faggots?”

“Jimmy!” his mother said.

Brian turned to the boy and said, “Yes, we’re gay. We’re also both jazz musicians, peace activists and very involved in school politics. I’m planning to be a math teacher and my boyfriend wants to be an engineer. Other than the fact that we can’t have children together, we’re no different than any other couple. I hope that someday you’ll find someone, a girlfriend or maybe a boyfriend, to love the way I love mine.”

The boy started blushing, making both Aaron and Brian wonder if they’d struck a nerve. The boy turned to them and said, “I’m sorry I called you guys faggots. The kids at school . . . we say things like that to each all the time.”

“I understand, Jimmy, but it’s not a very nice thing to say. But we’ll let it slide this once,” Brian said as he smiled. “You can tell all your friends when you get back to school that you met a couple of real live faggots on your trip”

Jimmy giggled and said, “I can’t tell them that or they’ll think I’m gay. But you guys are pretty cool.” They shook hands across the aisle.

Brian was very anxious waiting at the baggage claim until he saw someone wheel out his wheelchair. He’d had visions of having to spend his entire vacation in a rickety old wheelchair if the airline managed to lose his. Finally reunited with his chair, the boys headed out with their limo driver and were soon on the way to Disney World. When they got to their room, they were stunned to find that it was a suite with a view of the lake and the rest of the Disney complex. Waiting in the room was a wrapped basket containing fruit, exotic cheeses and crackers, and there was a bottle of champagne - yes, champagne! Aaron tried to tip the bellhop, but the bellhop informed them that their package included all gratuities. “The management’d have my hide if they found out I accepted a tip. When they say ‘all gratuities included,’ they mean it!”

As the bellhop left, Aaron slipped the ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign onto the outer door-knob and closed and locked the door.

Brian asked, “You wanna get naked?”

“Hell yeah,” Aaron said as he pulled off his shirt, ripped off his shoes, and quickly removed his pants, boxers and socks. He was naked in sixty seconds flat. Brian was close behind him. Soon the boys were laying side-by-side on the bed, kissing passionately and fondling each other - Brian groping at Aaron’s dick and balls and Aaron caressing Brian’s nipples. This didn’t last long as the boys were seriously in heat. Brian worked his way down Aaron’s neck and chest, licking each of Aaron’s nipple rings. Being in the right position for it, Aaron started thrusting his rock-hard erection against Brian, brushing the head of his dick over Brian’s zone of injury as he used his fingers to simultaneously stroke Brian’s nipples.

When Brian became flushed and started shaking, Aaron knew that he was having one hell of an intense orgasm. This put Aaron over the edge as he shot load after load of his cum onto Brian’s chest and neck. Brian took his hands and started scooping up Aaron’s nectar and swallowed it all. They then started passionately kissing, enjoying their post-coital bliss.

“That was awesome, dude, as always.”

“Short and sweet,” Aaron agreed. “God, I love you!”

“I love you too, God.” Brian quipped.

“You’re too much.”

“So are you, but I can never get enough of you.”

“Yeah, same here . . . I guess we’d better wash up and get dressed if we’re gonna do anything with the rest of the day.”

“OK, let’s try out the shower!”


“Takes one to know one!”

The bathroom was enormous - larger than many hotel rooms by itself. The walk-in shower was huge and there was even a swing-down seat that Brian could use in lieu of his shower chair. They washed each other as usual, with Brian giving Aaron a quick blow job and Aaron managing to suck Brian off to an antegrade ejaculation - God, he was glad that had come back!

They got dressed and realized they were starved. They quickly devoured the entire fruit and cheese basket, but saved the champagne for later. They then headed to the monorail and took it to the Magic Kingdom. Getting around was fairly easy in Brian’s wheelchair and a lot of the rides were indeed accessible, without them even having to wait in line. They were disappointed that Brian wasn’t allowed to ride Space Mountain without a signed release from his parents. They took a release form and hoped his parents would agree to fill it out and fax it back before the week was out.

They enjoyed a quick meal around mid-afternoon and stayed at the park until the nightly parade and fireworks. They headed over to Downtown Disney and ate at Fulton Crab House and then strolled around taking in all the shops and attractions before heading back to their suite, too tired to do anything but sleep. Besides, it wasn’t a bowel program night - that, and with it a round of passionate love-making, would be tomorrow night!


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

29. A Helping Hand

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 29 – A Helping Hand

The boys awoke late on Sunday and quickly showered and dressed, excited at the prospect of another day in paradise. They enjoyed a leisurely Sunday brunch and then decided to take the monorail over to MGM. Because they didn’t have to wait in line, they got through most of the rides that interested them fairly quickly, so they decided to head over and get started on EPCOT for the rest of the afternoon.

As they stood in line for the monorail, Aaron noticed a couple of teenaged boys standing ahead of them who appeared to be about their age. After a short wait, they were all directed to line up in a series of holding pens to board the next train. Aaron, Brian and the boys Aaron had noticed were the only ones in their pen. While they waited for the monorail to arrive, Aaron saw the two boys briefly hold hands and smile at each other when they thought no one was looking.

There was something about these boys that made Aaron feel comfortable - that he wanted to get to know them - and so he leaned over and whispered in Brian’s ear, “I saw these boys hold hands and I want to let them know we’re gay, too.” He then gave Brian a quick peck on the lips - nothing passionate, but just long enough to attract the boys’ attention without drawing the attention of the rest of the crowd.

“Wow. I mean, like, you guys are gay?” one of the boys whispered to Aaron.

“Well, aren’t you?” Aaron whispered back. “I saw you two hold hands a minute ago.”

The two boys started blushing.

“Hey, don’t sweat it,” Brian whispered comfortingly. “It’s really cool that you’re out and all, and so are we.”

“Well, we’re not actually out at all,” whispered one of the boys. “I mean, no one knows we’re gay at home, much less that we’re boyfriends, but around here amongst strangers, well, it feels safer. We’ve gotten comfortable holding hands now and then and I didn’t even realize we’d done it in until you mentioned it. But it is cool to do this in public. I’m gonna miss it when we go home.”

“By the way, I’m Brian and this dork standing next to me is my boyfriend, Aaron.”

“My name’s Billy,” replied the first boy, “And this shit-face next to me is Chuck.”

“I’m not a shit-face, asshole!” retorted Chuck.

“Oh yes you are, especially when you’ve been rimming me,” Billy whispered with a sly smile. Everyone started blushing as they all laughed.

“Speaking of home, where are you guys from?” Brian continued.

Billy answered, “Denver.”

“Oh yeah? Me and Brian were there last October. He had some surgery there,” said Aaron.

“OK, cool. What kinda surgery was it?”

Brian answered, “There was a hole in my spinal cord, so they had to fix it to keep me from becoming more paralyzed.”

“Is that why you’re in a wheelchair?” Chuck said as the monorail came to a stop.

“No, I was paralyzed just over a year ago in a car accident.”

“Oh,” the second boy said as the monorail arrived and they all boarded the train. “How’d it happen?”

“A drunk driver hit the car me and Aaron were in.”

“That sucks,” Billy said. “So how long have you guys been together?”

“About a year and a half,” Aaron replied. “A very rough year and a half. Not because of our relationship,” Aaron added in a near whisper, “but because of the accident and everything that happened after it.”

“I don’t know how I’d have made it without Aaron,” Brian added quietly. “Anyway, how long have you guys been together?”

“Me and Chuck have been best friends forever, but we realized we liked each other as more than friends almost four years ago, after I’d just turned twelve.”

“Our parents don’t know, though,” Chuck added in a hushed tone. “It’s been a challenge keeping it a secret for four years and we’ve had to do a lot of sneaking around, but we have our own room while we’re here, so we’re making up for lost time!”

“That’s really cool,” Brian said. “So your folks are letting you alone?”

“Pretty much. We have to meet up for some meals, but both our parents want to do their own thing and we definitely want to do ours.”

“How long are you here for.”

“We’ll be here all week!”

“So will we. That is so cool! Hey, you wanna spend time with us? Thanks to Brian, we don’t have to wait in any of the lines.”

“Thanks Aaron, we’d love to,” Billy responded. “By the way, how about your parents?”

“They’re not here. This trip was a seventeenth birthday present for Aaron”

“You mean your parents know?” Chuck asked incredulously.

“Yeah, they know, thanks to this wheelchair,” Brian replied as they exited the train.


“When we had the accident, I’d snuck over to Aaron’s place. His parents already knew and were cool with it, but mine were way anti-gay. Anyway, his parents were away for the weekend and I snuck over to his place to have our first try at anal sex. A drunk driver slammed into us on the way home. Of course, my parents figured out what was happening right away and tried to keep us apart, but eventually they came around. Turns out my dad’s bisexual and had been hiding it all these years.”

“Oh man.”

“Yeah, it kinda freaked me too, but it took real balls for him to admit it, and even more to openly accept that his only kid was gay. He was brought up real religious and had a hard time dealing with himself, but he started to realize he couldn’t let the same thing happen to me. So my parents are cool with us now. Aaron spends the night with me all the time, and they paid for half this trip.”

“You’re so lucky,” Billy added. “You know, we’ve done similar stuff ourselves . . . I’ve even snuck out and driven us to the movies a few times, even though I don’t have my license yet.”

“I didn’t have my license either,” Aaron mentioned. “We had to go to court to get my license when I turned sixteen.”

“God, that’s scary. I mean, we knew we were taking a risk, but I definitely wouldn’t want our parents to find out that way.”

“Do you think they’d have a problem with it?” Brian asked.

“I dunno,” Chuck answered. “I’ve heard my dad call people ‘fags’ sometimes, and I think he might freak out if he knew I was one. Like Brian, I’m an only child.”

“Same here,” Billy added, “and my dad also uses language like that.”

“I understand you being nervous. I was scared shitless, too. But you know something? I have an idea that just might help you find out if your parents would be accepting or not.”

“You do, Brian? How?”

“Well, Aaron and I are out . . . at home, at school, and even here. Maybe you could invite us to dinner with all of you. Don’t worry, we won’t be total fags around your folks, but we could make it obvious enough to get them thinking. Seeing how they react could give you at least a glimpse of what to expect if you decide to come out to them.”

“You know,” Aaron said, “that’s a pretty damn good idea. Almost as good as something I mighta come up with.” They all laughed and agreed to try to set things up for Monday night.

They boys were a bit disappointed to find out that with more than three people in their group, Brian and Aaron were made to wait while Billy and Chuck went through the line, but it was a small price to pay for friendship. They started to make their way around EPCOT, and got through Spaceship Earth and the Universe of Energy and Mission Space pavilions, and had a blast on the Test Track before Billy and Chuck announced that they needed to get going to meet their parents.

They exchanged room information and cell phone numbers and parted ways. Brian and Aaron spent a little more time exploring the shops around EPCOT before heading back to their suite to get ready for the evening. They had a reservation at the House of Blues in Downtown Disney, where Big Bad Voodoo Daddy, a well-known swing band, was performing. This would be a memorable night - in more ways than one.

The dinner consisted of authentic Louisiana cuisine and it was wonderful, and the show was superb. Neither of them had heard a big band perform live before, and while Brian liked swing and Aaron tolerated it, there was no comparison between listening to a CD and watching a live performance. The sound literally permeated their bodies and their souls. The boys returned to their suite, singing some of the tunes they’d heard that evening.

After enjoying the bottle of champagne they’d saved from their welcome package, they got undressed and talked about how they might approach Billy and Chuck’s parents the next night, while Brian completed his bowel program. Aaron hooked up the enema bag and cleaned Brian out, and cleaned up in the shower. Then he cathed his lover, and they retreated to the bedroom and settled in for a long night of pleasure, laying down naked, side by side.

They started kissing passionately as they groped each other, eliciting soft moans. They stroked each other’s hair, looked into each other’s eyes and kissed and kissed again. “God, I love this,” Brian cooed.

“Me too, baby, me too. I still can’t believe my luck in finding you.”

“No, I found you! I’m the lucky one!”

“No way. I’m way luckier than you!”

“Well if you’re luckier, then I’m the luckiest!”

Aaron started to sing Ben Folds’ The Luckiest and both boys started to laugh.

“Who’da thunk sex could be so funny,” Brian smirked.

“Truly the joy of sex - it’s all emotions rolled into one!”

“Shut the fuck up, my little queer.”

“I’m not so little, my boy.”

“Yeah, I’ve noticed,” Brian said as he closed his eyes and started kissing Aaron again. They kept at it for the longest time, savoring the texture and taste of each other’s mouths. Sometime after midnight, Brian took things further by starting to kiss Aaron on the forehead, on the neck, on his ears and on his chest. He licked delicately around Aaron’s nipple rings and ran his tongue down in a line from his chest to his belly button, which he then explored with his tongue. He lingered at Aaron’s crotch, taking in the wonderful, musky scent, and then started licking at Aaron’s balls.

“Oh man, Brian, this is incredible.”

“Nothing but the best for my boy,” he replied as he resumed licking. He then commanded, “Turn over.”

Aaron did so without hesitation. Brian started massaging Aaron’s back, working his hands lower and lower as he reached down and kissed the back of his neck. Aaron felt Brian’s long hair drape down and tickle his back as Brian massaged - it was an incredible turn-on. Brian massaged his way down to Aaron’s butt, kneading his cheeks rhythmically as he thrust Aaron’s pelvis down into the bed, causing him to hump the sheets. Just when Aaron thought he was about to cum, Brian stopped. Aaron wasn’t sure what to expect next when he suddenly felt something wet on the sole of his right foot. Brian was tonguing his foot! He felt Brian lick along the instep, and then he inserted his tongue under each toe and gently probed the space between each toe. He did the same thing with the left foot before gently licking his way back up Aaron’s calf and thigh, stopping just short of his ass.

Brian spread Aaron’s cheeks and gazed in awe at Aaron’s pink pucker. He licked Aaron and licked him again, rimming him into oblivion.

“Oh Brian, this is wonderful.”

“Mm hmm,” Brian hummed as he started to gently probe Aaron’s love canal with his tongue, pushing it deep inside. He backed off and licked the back of Aaron’s ball sack, and then ran his tongue back up Aaron’s crack and probed again inside, driving Aaron crazy. Finally he asked, “Are you ready, my love?”

“I thought you’d never ask. I’m always ready.”

“Then go to it!”

Aaron didn’t waste any time - he was horny as hell and ready to cum. He quickly unrolled a condom onto his shaft and generously lubricated it with some KY. There was no need to loosen Brian’s anus, thanks to his paraplegia and his use of suppositories. Aaron pushed Brian’s legs up over his shoulders and lined up his achingly hard dick with Brian’s hole, and pushed inside. The feeling was incredible. He reached down and started kissing Brian as he grabbed his nipples and started rubbing and pinching them furiously. Aaron could feel him quivering under him, having one of the most intense orgasms he’d ever had since his injury. Aaron thrust forward, sliding his dick in and out rhythmically.

Although Brian couldn’t clamp down on him, the thrusting elicited reflex contractions of the sphincter that were nearly as pleasurable to Aaron. Suddenly he felt Brian’s body go into intense spasms as a wetness spread across the space between their bodies. Brian’s sphincter clamped down on Aaron’s dick like a vise, sending Aaron over the edge as he pumped his life essence into his condom. Brian continued shuddering under Aaron, enjoying his own prolonged orgasm, heightened by the knowledge of the pleasure he’d brought the love of his life.

Finally, Aaron’s dick began to go limp and it plopped out of Brian. Aaron lapped up as much of Brian’s cum as he could and he then rolled the condom off his dick, allowing Brian to lick up as much of his own nectar as he could. Afterwards, they lay side by side, gazing into each other’s eyes.

“That was amazing. Simply amazing. It just gets better and better! I love you so much, Brian. I just hope that you get enough out of it.”

“Aaron, it feels great. Making you feel good makes me feel good, and on top of that, you make me feel real good, too. I know I’ll never know what anal sex feels like, but frankly, I don’t care. What we have is special, borne of love. I feel sorry for the rest of the world.” They kissed passionately with less and less intensity until they both drifted off to sleep in each other’s arms

Other than a brief wakeup call at 4 AM for Brian’s cath and to turn him to the other side, with Aaron then spooning behind him, they slept very well until they heard the phone ring. It was now bright outside and Aaron reached for the phone.


“Hello, Aaron?”

“Oh, hi Chuck. What time is it?”

“Good night, huh? We had a great night, too. Just got up a little while ago. It’s ten o’clock.”

“Oh man, Chuck, we didn’t mean to sleep so late. Let’s say we meet back at the entrance to EPCOT for lunch at noon?”

“Noon would be great! See you then.”

Aaron and Brian quickly showered and dressed, barely having enough time to get to EPCOT at the designated hour. Billy and Chuck were already waiting for them when they got there. They decided on Mexican and headed straight for the Mexican pavilion, wolfing down an enormous meal. They were all starved. The plan was to meet up with the ’rents at eight that evening at the Polynesian Village, where Billy and Chuck were staying. That left them plenty of time to see the rest of EPCOT and to stop over at Brian and Aaron’s suite to freshen up for the evening.

“Wow, this place is enormous!” Chuck exclaimed as he entered the boys’ suite.

“Yeah, well, our parents splurged a bit. It’s been a rough year for Brian and me, so I guess this was a way of thanking us for pulling through it . . . So, are you boys ready for tonight?”

“Whadaya mean?” Billy asked innocently.

“Well, not to scare you or anything, but things could get real uncomfortable, and it could happen real fast. Whatever happens, don’t freak. Brian and I can handle anything and we can deflect any suspicion off you two if we have to. But if you freak, your worst nightmare could be confirmed. If this scares you, then Brian and I can just keep quiet and we’ll all have a nice evening together.”

‘No, Aaron, we’ve wanted to do this for a long time. We may never get this kind of opportunity again.”

“OK, but be careful. We’ll be there for you 100%.”

At 7:30, they boarded the monorail and headed over to the Polynesian Village. They met the ’rents and after introductions, were seated for their dinner. Everyone looked over their menus, ordered their meals, and then the conversation turned to the two ‘strangers’ at the table.

“So you boys all met on the monorail, I understand.” Bill senior asked as much as stated.

“Yup, we were all in line together and we just got to talking. We hit it off right away,” Aaron answered.

“That’s nice to hear,” Chuck’s mom chimed in. She turned to Brian and asked, “Brian, do you mind if I ask how you ended up in a wheelchair?”

“Not at all. Aaron and me were out one night when our car was struck by a drunk driver. It was a freak accident and everything just conspired to put my body in the wrong place in an otherwise safe car, so that my spine took the full brunt of the impact. Aaron walked away with nothing more than a few broken ribs and a mild concussion. The drunk driver ran from the scene, but was killed when he rolled his SUV later that same night. That happened a little over a year ago. But everything’s OK and we’ve made adjustments.”

“It must have been hard.”

“I won’t say that it was easy, but it could have been a lot worse. At least we weren’t in some top-heavy SUV like the guy that hit us . . . we’da rolled over for sure and probably both be dead.”

Aaron and Brian could tell from the silence around the table that probably everyone else at the table drove SUV’s. Finally, Billy broke the silence. “Brian was in Denver a few months ago for some surgery.”

“Oh really?” Chuck’s mom stated more than asked.

“You have one of the best spine neurosurgeons in the world, so when I had some complications I headed to Colorado for surgery on my spine. Good thing, too . . . the best our surgeons could promise was that things might not get any worse.”

Just then the waiter brought their salads.

“Well, that’s nice to know,” Billy’s mom chimed in for the first time. “So why don’t you boys tell us a little about yourselves.” She added now that she’d spoken up.

Aaron and Brian looked at each other and knew that the moment of truth had arrived. “Well, we’re both advanced placement students in our high school. I’m a sophomore and Aaron’s a junior. We hang out with each other a lot. We’re both into music. Some day I hope to be a great jazz musician, but I’m planning to teach math as my day job. Aaron and I play in our school’s jazz ensemble.”

“Don’t be so modest, Brian.” Aaron added. “Brian actually founded the school’s jazz ensemble. He used to be a great trumpet player before the injury, but he doesn’t have the lung power now, so he plays guitar and I play sax.”

“Cool!” Billy exclaimed. “You guys didn’t tell us about that. I play tenor sax and Chuck plays drums. We belong to a small jazz quartet that we started.”

“That’s way cool, I used to play tenor and alto sax before the injury, and now Aaron plays them in the Jazz Ensemble.”

“Awesome! So are there any other things you guys are into?” Billy asked innocently enough.

Well, this was it, Aaron realized as he started to speak. “Brian and I are very active in a group called Students for Peace . . . in fact, that’s how we met. We’re also active in student government, and we’re active in our school’s GSA.”

“GSA?” Chuck asked.

“It’s our school’s gay-straight alliance.” Aaron went on to talk about how the Jazz Ensemble was their true passion, trying to diffuse attention drawn by his last remark, but it was clear that everyone else’s attention was focused on what he’d just said.

Bill senior looked at Aaron, and then at Brian, then at Chuck and finally at his own son. Both Chuck and Billy were already blushing by then, but when Bill senior’s eyes locked onto his son’s, Billy suddenly bolted, running out of the restaurant before Brian or Aaron could divert attention from Chuck and Billy. As Aaron had feared, things had gotten very bad, very fast. Aaron didn’t wait to ask, he ran after Billy as he heard his father shouting Billy’s name, almost pleading with his voice.

“I’m sure Aaron’ll find him.” Brian said to help calm things down.

“What’s going on here?” Chuck’s father asked, seemingly oblivious to what had just happened.

“Dan, I think our sons are gay.” Billy’s father proclaimed.


“Dan, I’ve suspected it for a long time, but just didn’t want to admit it to anybody . . . not even to myself . . . but you saw what happened here. I think the boys had this all planned and it was their way of trying to tell us, wasn’t it Chuck?”

When Chuck started sobbing, Brian realized that the cat was essentially out of the bag and there was no reason to deny it.

“Aaron and I have counseled many gay kids since we came out. It’s never easy telling parents. God, my parents nearly destroyed me when they unintentionally found out. Aaron and I just thought that a nice dinner would be a good way for us to explore how all of you felt before your sons made their decision on whether or not to tell you. We told them not to freak, but I guess Billy panicked.”

“My son is not gay!!” Dan screamed loudly so that nearly everyone in the restaurant had to have heard. Chuck began crying hysterically and Brian motioned for him to come over to him and he hugged and comforted the boy.

No! I will not have a faggot for a son!!”

Brian looked up at Chuck’s father and glared at him, and then he softened his look and spoke. “Last year, I felt my situation was hopeless and decided to deal with it by downing a bottle of Vicodin.” Brian knew he was taking a bit of license with this, but felt it was for a good cause. “I wanted to end it all and nearly succeeded. Even still, my liver function is not back to normal. Nearly half of all teenage suicides are among gay teens. Believe me, I didn’t choose this life. If it weren’t for Aaron and the love we share, I’d have given anything to be straight. If you’d asked me before I met Aaron if I’d rather be a straight paraplegic or gay and able to walk, there would have been no question . . . I would have stuck with the wheelchair. Your son can’t help the way he feels any more than I can. He was probably born that way and it’s no one’s fault, any more than someone could be blamed for making their kid left-handed. But if you insist on not having a gay son, you will almost certainly get your wish . . . he’ll leave you, or maybe worse than that. . . .”

The table was eerily quiet except for the sound of Chuck’s sobs when Aaron returned a short while later with Billy. It was very obvious that he’d been crying, too. Rather than talking to the adults, Billy sat down next to Chuck and peeled him off Brian, turning him to face his own boyfriend.

“I’m so sorry, Chuck. I don’t know what to say . . . I just freaked. I could tell that my dad was catching on and I freaked.”

Chuck fell into Billy’s arms and sobbed, “Your dad kinda already knew, but my dad hates me.”

“I don’t hate you, son.” Everyone was startled to hear Chuck’s father speak. “I love you and couldn’t stand it if anything happened to you. But this . . . I dunno. It’s gonna take some time to get used to it. And your mom and I are gonna have a lot of talking to do.”

Chuck stopped crying and looked silently at his father. Bill senior then asked, “So what are we going to do for the remainder of the trip?”

Everyone was surprised when Chuck’s mother answered. “We’re going to continue the trip as planned. The boys will stay together in their room as we had planned, and they’ll spend their time here as they want. They’ve probably been doing things together for years.” She then turned to her husband and added, “And if our son is gay, Dan, wouldn’t you rather he be with Billy than with some stranger who may have AIDS?” Billy’s mother nodded her head in agreement.

Bill senior turned to Brian and said, “You boys seem to be kind and compassionate kids. Good kids. Would you be willing to help our sons get through this?”

“We’ll be happy to . . . and they’re really great kids and we’ve really have enjoyed spending time with them . . . but they’re going to be fine.” Aaron said with a furrowed brow. “It’s you folks I’m more worried about. Billy and Chuck have been together all their lives and have had time to get used to being boyfriends.

“Your sons will be fine as long as you don’t push them away. They’re still the same sons you’ve loved all their lives. The only thing that changed tonight is that now you know they love each other as much as you love your spouses. That doesn’t make them bad or evil. They’re just children. But there will be some tough times ahead for them, especially if they do come out or are outed at school. They need you to be there for them.”

Brian added, “There are some excellent resources on the web and support groups for parents of gay teens. Aaron and I would be happy to get you some information if you’d like.”

“We’d like that very much,” Billy’s mom answered.

As things calmed down at the table, the young waiter came up to them and asked if they were ready for their dinner. He then added, “My parents found out about me by accident. We don’t speak to each other any more. I’m having to work my way through college. I’d give anything for someone to have had this conversation with my parents when I was your sons’ age.”

The waiter then left and returned a short while later with their main courses. The mood at the table lightened considerably as they all ate their meals and the topic of conversation turned to what everyone was doing during their stay at Disney World.

The remainder of the week went by in a flash as the four boys became inseparable, enjoying themselves fully. They returned to the Magic Kingdom and, once Brian’s parents had faxed their permission, rode Space Mountain several times. They visited the Animal Kingdom and even got wet at Typhoon Lagoon to the fullest extent possible with Brian’s limitations. They even recorded their own music video together at Pleasure Island - they were able to rent the instruments they needed and, as Brian later quipped, “didn’t sound half bad.”

When Sunday morning rolled around, they exchanged e-mail and IM addresses, emotional hugs, and said their goodbyes to new friends they had come to love, thanks to a chance encounter while waiting in line.


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

30. Pillow Talk

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis

Chapter 30 - Pillow Talk

Dr. Prentice welcomed her two patients into her office and had them sit down to begin their weekly counseling session. “So how’ve you boys been?”

“We’ve been great,” Brian replied.

“Fully recovered from that trip to Disney World?”

“That was over a month ago. Yeah, it was intense, but we’ve recovered.”

Dr. Prentice chuckled, then began, “Had any interesting dreams lately?”

Brian knew exactly where this was going. “Yeah, doc, I still walk in my dreams.”

“Brian, I’ve spoken with people who’ve been paralyzed for forty years, and they still walk in their dreams. What I mean is has there been anything unusual that brings back memories? Any nightmares lately?”

“Nah . . .”

“Brian?” Aaron prodded.

“Well, OK, I had the burning one again. You know, the one where Aaron’s in his mother’s old car and it’s on fire and I can’t get to him.”

“Yeah, and he woke up screaming again.”

“That’s OK, Brian. It just shows how much you care for Aaron, and how much you’re scared of losing him. It’s OK to express these dreams. You need to get them out. Only by talking about them can you address your fear head-on and get beyond it. Only then will these dreams lessen.”

She looked towards Aaron and asked, “How about you Aaron? Have you had any nightmares lately?”

“Thankfully, not since before we left for Disney World. I guess I’m over the accident, but that last one where I dreamt that Brian died from his suicide attempt was a real doozy.” Aaron would never forget that dream - it seemed so real at the time and he couldn’t get a good night’s sleep for more than a week afterwards - he was so afraid of having it again and waking up to find it was real.

“Well, it probably won’t be the last time you’ll have that dream, either, particularly when the two of you are apart. You may want to get some counseling when you leave for college.”

Changing the subject, she continued talking to Aaron. “Oh, and how’s your campaign for class president going?”

“It’s bitter,” Aaron answered. He’d been flabbergasted when he was nominated, but then went into the campaign with gusto, knowing he could do some real good. He’d lost his fight with the school board to enlighten middle-schoolers about gay life, but he received a lot of positive publicity from his efforts and he and the GSA had vowed to continue the fight the next time the school board was up for election. Aaron knew that he might actually stand a chance of getting some real change on the school board if he were the senior class president, and it wouldn’t look bad on his college applications, either.

Unfortunately, his chief rival was his old nemesis, Scott McDonald, the boy who’d painted Aaron’s car pink the previous summer. “McDonald keeps using expressions like ‘elect someone who represents your interests’, implying that a gay guy can’t represent straight people’s interests. It’s disgusting. The principal finally clamped down on the campaign last week, making him cool down the more blatant of his rhetoric. You’d think spending 100 hours in an AIDS shelter would have taught him a lesson.”

“Respect isn’t something that can be forced, Aaron. He won’t be able to show it until he learns how to earn it himself.”

“Speaking of which, my locker was spray-painted ‘FAG’ again last week. The school put a camera inside my locker, but whoever’s been doing this has been clever enough to cover up the ventilation slats. No one admits to seeing who did it, so nothing’s changed. This campaign has showed me the darker side of student life at my school. I’m just trying to do what’s right, but there are plenty of students who hate me for what I am.”

“I went through some of this, too,” Brian confided. “Nothing as blatant as what you’re going through, but I feel for you.”

“How do you feel about all of this, Aaron?”

“I feel like shit. I’ll admit it. It turns my stomach. But I’m stronger than they are. I’m proud of who I am and I’m not backing down. If I lose, I lose, but if I win, things are gonna change . . . not right away, but things will be better.”

“What about you, Brian?”

“I’m glad I decided to turn down the nomination for junior class president.”

“That was a wise move, Brian. You’re still going through a lot and you haven’t fully recovered yet. Now is not the time to be involved in what Aaron’s going through. We can talk a year from now if you decide to run for senior class president, but for now, it’s better that you’re on the sidelines.”

“I guess. . . but there’s a part of me that tells me I should be doing something, too. I love that my boyfriend has become so active in school politics, but it’s never been my style to sit back and watch things happen.”

“What do you mean, Brian?” Aaron jumped in. “You were the class president last year until you got sick, and you founded the Jazz Ensemble. You’re still active in Students for Peace and on the planning committee of the GSA.”

“Aaron’s right, Brian,” Dr. Prentice chimed in. “Many people would say you’re already over-extended. I think it’s remarkable that you’ve resumed so much of your life so soon after your suicide attempt, but pushing yourself only makes it harder to deal with the grieving process. You’ve come a long way in the last two months, but you have a long way to go.”

“I don’t suppose I should mention that I’ve been thinking about graduating early.”

“Brian, you know I don’t think that’s a good idea. You’ve lost too much time as it is, and you need some breathing room in your life. If you push it too far too fast, you could end up right back where you started, and then where would you be?”

“I hear you, doc, but I took the SAT and I got a 1480.”

“Damn, when did you do that? . . . You beat me! . . . by twenty points no less.” Aaron said in mock disgust. “Honey, I don’t want you to kill yourself just so we can be together during my freshman year in college. We’re only talking nine months, after all, but if it comes down to it, there are some outstanding universities within commuting distance of here.”

“No way, Aaron! You have to pursue your dreams. If you don’t, you’ll always wonder if you might have done better if you’d gone to a top school. And with a 4.0 GPA and your high SATs, you have a good shot of getting into whatever school you choose.” Brian paused for a moment, and then went on. “Didn’t you tell me that during your college visits, people talked about when you went there, rather than if?”

“All of them except MIT . . . I might have to retake my SATs to get in there,” Aaron interjected. “But what was really cool is that no one seemed to care that I’m gay. I mean, the fact that I’m gay and that I’m out if anything seemed to be a plus, and even the kids who took me around on the campus tours all seemed to be OK with it. It’s so different than in high school! Brian if I could get into MIT and if you could get into Harvard . . . don’t you think would be worth spending those nine months apart?”

Brian let out a long sigh that shook Aaron to his core. He knew his boyfriend was about to bring up something huge.

“Mr. Jeffreys thinks I might actually have a good shot at getting into one of the top-ranked music schools.”

“Oh?” Aaron asked.

“Who’s Mr. Jeffreys?” Dr. Prentice asked.

“He’s our school’s music director, and he helped us get the Jazz Ensemble going. I’d always thought music would have to be my secondary degree. I figured I’d need a day job and it only seemed natural to get a degree in education, so I could make a living as a teacher, but Mr. Jeffreys thinks that I should try to get into a top-ranked music school. With my grades, my SAT scores and, well, with my minority status as a person with a disability, he thinks my admission to a top school is almost a lock. With a degree from a top school, I could have a career in music, which is something I’d only dreamed of before.”

“Wow!” Was all Aaron could say at first. Yes, Aaron thought to himself, it would be nice to have a degree from MIT, but unless he planned to be a college professor, it would make less of a difference to his future than it would to Brian. Aaron knew then and there that his dreams would have to take a back seat to Brian’s.

“Brian, I can get an engineering degree from a well-regarded school, just about anywhere. I don’t need a degree from MIT to do what I want to do in life. I’ll be there every step of the way as your partner in life.”

“No, Aaron, I can’t do that to you. Your dreams are every bit as important as mine.”

“But my dreams mean absolutely nothing if I’m not with you.”

“Nor mine if I’m not with you.”

“Brian,” Dr. Prentice said after a pause, “you’ve thrown a bit of a monkey wrench into both Aaron’s and your college plans. You both have a lot to think about and there’ll be a lot more planning involved. You’re both young and, in addition to making your education choices, you have a whole life in front of you. You do have a little time, but before you know it, some very important decisions will be thrust upon you . . . decisions that could affect you for the rest of your lives.

“One thing that I find often helps is to make a plan for your future life. The plan should be written down on paper, so you can refer to it when you come to each fork in the road as you go through life. It should be general, in most aspects. You can format it in any way you wish, but consider this . . . a page each for what you wish to accomplish in the next six months, the next year, the next five years, and the next twenty years, with plenty of room to make changes. Keep the goals general, and even if it seems unachievable now, write it down anyway. Give your imagination some exercise. I’d also like you to prepare your life plans separately, but certainly include each other in your goals. In two weeks, at our regular session, the three of us will go over them. I think the result of this type of sharing will surprise you, and probably me as well.”

As they exited Dr. Prentice’s office, Aaron and Brian were silent, walking almost in a daze. They got into Aaron’s car together, with Aaron at the wheel, but he didn’t even insert his keys at first - he just sat there, staring directly ahead.

Finally, Brian broke the silence. “Are you as nervous as I am about making a life plan?”

“I’m scared to death that our plans will be different . . . that there’ll be no way to reconcile our goals for the future.”

“I’m scared, too, but I think that’s part of the point of what Dr. Prentice is asking us to do. If we want different things in life, then there’s little point to talking about our plans for going to college together. But that’s not gonna happen. . . . It’s all about finding common ground. I know we’re going to be together for a long time . . . not just the twenty years Dr. Prentice was talking about, but the rest of our lives.”

“I know you’re right, Brian, but I’m still nervous.”

“That’s OK, but it’s gonna be kinda exciting to work on our plans, don’tcha think?”

“I guess,” Aaron said as he started the car and drove off. . . .

When Aaron went to school the next day, he groaned as he saw that his locker had once again been spray-painted with the word “FAG”. This was getting to be old. Later in the day, he’d have to deal with it, but for now he just needed to get to his first class.

He was surprised when, late in the first period, the principal’s voice came over the loudspeaker, requesting that Scott McDonald, Jeremy Sanders and Brian Phillips come to his office immediately. What did the principal want with his chief rival for class president, and two of the bullies he tended to hang with?

Later in the morning, when he was opening his locker, a kid with a locker across from him, whom he didn’t really know that well called, out to him. “Glad I was able to help, man.”

“What are you talking about?” he asked, confusion evident in his voice.

“They caught them red-handed. I hear they’ll be expelled.”

“Caught who? I Still don’t get what you mean, man.”

The kid then opened his locker up all the way and Aaron’s jaw just about dropped to the floor when he saw a small video cam taped in place behind the slats in the locker door. “You heard the principal call them down to his office. Well, it was thanks to this baby. Again, I’m glad I could help. Looks like you’ll be the new class president.”

Aaron slowly started to absorb what the kid was saying to him. Scott McDonald, his chief rival in the race for class president, was one of the kids vandalizing his locker. Even if he wasn’t expelled, he’d never be allowed to finish his run for class president. However, because McDonald had chosen to attack Aaron directly in his campaign, he’d effectively turned it into a two person race. The attacks had boosted Aaron’s name recognition. With McDonald out of the race, there was no way the other candidates could catch up in the remaining week of the campaign. It hit him like a ton of bricks - he really was going to be the next senior class president. Brian’s prophecy from a year ago had been right.

That evening, after dinner and after talking on the phone with Brian about the day’s turn of events, Aaron pulled out a sheet of paper and started to think about his life’s dreams. Although the election wasn’t over, by the time he and Brian met with Dr. Prentice, there was a very good chance he would be the senior class president-elect. It still blew him away to think about it, but being the class president would certainly play a major part in his near future. With that in mind, he started to write.

Aaron thought that it would be difficult to write down what he wanted for himself and for Brian during the coming months and years, but it came surprisingly easy to him. First there was what he hoped to accomplish if he were elected class president, being an activist for gay students, but also respecting the needs of all of the students. That alone could have filled his four pages, so he kept this part general. Next came his plans for school and for his career. This, he found, was intimately tied to his life with Brian. His plans were flexible and could easily accommodate his boyfriend’s life goals. Finally, he wrote about his plans and goals for life with Brian. A civil union or, hopefully, marriage was a given, but there was more to it than that. Aaron wanted Brian to be an equal partner in the relationship. Wherever life took them, they would share.

Aaron could scarcely believe it when he finished his first draft and looked at his alarm clock. It was three AM!

As he hung up the phone with Aaron, Brian similarly took out a sheet of paper and started to work on his own life plan. With a boyfriend who was the senior class president, he knew their time together would be somewhat limited during the coming year. He knew this from personal experience. He therefore organized the first part of his plan around supporting his boyfriend while, at the same time, pouring himself into his studies, so that he could graduate early if the opportunity presented itself. As an entering junior, he was eligible to take summer courses at the community college for dual enrolment, and he intended to take advantage of this, starting with the coming term.

Brian realized in that instant that his desire to graduate early was related to his desire to be with Aaron only in part. It was like a light bulb being turned on in his head. His desire to study was strong because so much of his time since the accident had been spent on his rehabilitation, physical and mental. This had left him with a mental vacuum and he had an overwhelming desire to fill it. That, he felt, was reason enough to push his studies to the top of his list, second only to his desire to be with Aaron. But if he were to graduate early, he would need to start thinking about schools now, and so his six month sheet would be filled with things related to this.

After he’d mapped out his plans for school in the first six months, the next six months and the first five years, he set about thinking about his relationship with Aaron. That was a no-brainer. He saw Aaron as his partner for life. There would be a commitment ceremony and, hopefully, one day a marriage. In the short run, they’d go to school together and support each other in their fulfillment of their dreams.

Thinking about the long term made Brian’s head hurt. He could deal with planning for five years, but the next twenty years hinged so much on whether or not he gained admittance to a top music school. No longer a pessimist, Brian decided to assume he would make his career in music. He would complete a Ph.D. and find a position as a professor in a major music school. Performing professionally, however, just wouldn’t be practical - most performance venues were far from accessible, and he really wasn’t that interested in performing, anyway. He would be content to perform as a hobby, much as he did now, and to fulfill his passion for the enjoyment and study of music through teaching the next generation of professional musicians and music scholars.

His life with Aaron would involve stable doses of love and a sharing of mutual career goals. He would never consider taking a position in a place that would make Aaron unhappy, and Aaron’s career would be every bit as important as his own. They would make themselves a home in a place that met both their needs, that was accepting of who they were, and that was reasonably wheelchair accessible. The final thought Brian had before he put down his pen was the issue of children. He kind of wanted them, but recognized the difficulty of being a paraplegic and raising kids. He imagined that being gay and paraplegic would be a double-whammy against him in seeking to adopt. In the end, he decided that children would be a nice goal, but one that he could take or leave, depending on Aaron’s wishes.

Aaron and Brian worked on refining their life plans over the subsequent two weeks, interrupted only by a night of extreme celebration when Aaron won his election by a landslide. They started out with dinner with both sets of parents and Adam at one of the best restaurants in the city. With their parents’ permission, they each even had a glass of wine with their meals. They returned home late that night and the boys continued their celebration in private. It was a bowel night, and they took full advantage of the opportunity to become better acquainted with each other’s bodies. Suffice it to say, they were not particularly alert the next day in class.

Finally, the day of their next session with Dr. Prentice had arrived. She greeted her patients warmly and led them into her office. Before they got started, she asked them if they’d completed their life plans and, when they told her they had, she asked her secretary to make three sets of copies of each of them. Sitting down together, she handed both boys a full set and took one for herself. She instructed Aaron and Brian to read each other’s plan while she read both of them herself, but cautioned them not to read too much into the other’s life plan. Ten minutes had elapsed by the time they were all through.

Both boys were silent and had blank expressions on their faces as Dr. Prentice lifted her head and looked at them.

“Well, you both have invested a lot time and effort into building your life plans . . . that’s very obvious from what we have here. I must say that I’m very pleased with what you’ve come up with. I see a great deal of maturity here. . . . well beyond your years. Many of my patients who are much, much older than you are can only manage to come up with a few odds and ends. I’m impressed with how much each of you has based your plan on the other. I’m generally skeptical about teenage relationships, but yours has all the hallmarks of one that has the potential to be long-term. You’re still young and, as you’ve already seen, there are all too many ways you could still screw it up, but if you want to spend your lives with each other, there’s nothing I see in either plan that will prevent that.

“Brian, your plan is one of the most detailed I’ve ever seen. I suggested you stick to generalities, but you’ve filled your pages and left little room for changes to be made. You might want to step back a bit and be a bit less specific. The one thing I can assure you is that there will be changes. For example, consider the likelihood there will be changes in the treatment of spinal cord injuries. You have planned your life under the assumption that nothing will change over the next twenty years, whereas I know for a fact that some things have changed even within the last five years.

“When I said, make your goals general, it was for a purpose. When you make too many specific goals this early in your life, you can be setting yourself up for disappointment with each goal you fail to achieve as intended. Eventually you lose sight of your life plan and discard these papers, just because of the disappointment they represent.

“That said, I think it’s very clear you know what you want to do with your life, but that your first priority is spending that life with Aaron. You have strong scholastic aspirations, and I’m less worried about your plans for speeding up your studies, now that you’ve explained yourself. Keep in mind that if it gets to be too much for you, you need to slow down, and you need to plan for the possibility that you may need to slow down.

“Aaron, your plans are considerably more nebulous, which probably is a good thing in light of Brian’s plans. You’ve demonstrated flexibility and a willingness to compromise to make sure your plans don’t interfere with Brian’s. Your dedication to Brian is evident throughout your plan, and that again bodes well for your future together. My one concern is that you need to also be able to make a life for yourself, separate from Brian. I’m not saying you won’t be together with Brian, but that your relationship may not succeed if you aren’t able to be your own person, first.

“Don’t worry . . . we’ll have lot’s more time to discuss your life plans in some detail in future sessions, but with the little time that remains, I’d like to ask each of you to tell me how closely your partner’s life plan coincides with what you expected their plan to be.

“Why don’t you start, Aaron?”

“Wow. I’m not sure what to say. You said it all, Dr. Prentice. I’m not sure I know what I expected Brian to write for his life plan. I knew that it would contain his wanting to go to music school and I’d hoped it would contain a lot about being together with me, but I had no idea he wanted to be a university professor. Actually, I think that’s pretty cool. I can definitely see Brian doing wheelies around the campus in his wheelchair, running over students who dare to get in the way.” Brian laughed at that. “Like you said, Dr. Prentice, Brian went into a lot more detail than I could have possibly thought about. It blows me away that he thought about having children . . . the thought never even entered my mind, but I kinda think I’d like to be a daddy. That would be cool.”

“Brian, what do you think about Aaron’s plan?”

“I think it’s really sweet. I know that’s a stupid thing to say about something as serious as a life plan, but it just fits with the person Aaron is. He’s selfless and that shows through clearly. I never really thought about what he might have written, except to hope and pray he didn’t want to live some place like Calcutta, where getting around in a wheelchair is impossible.” This time it was Aaron who laughed. “My only worry is that he may be sacrificing too much to be with me.” Brian put his hands up, cutting off what he knew Dr. Prentice was about to say. “Don’t worry, Dr. P. . . . I’ve long gotten over my feelings of inadequacy. Aaron is giving up a lot to be with me because he feels I’m worth it, and I know that to him, I am. I’d hoped Aaron would have put a bit more of his own plans in there . . . things that didn’t necessarily revolve around me. It would kill me to think he’s holding back on his ambitions on my account. . . .”

“Honey, don’t worry,” Aaron interrupted. “I had always assumed I’d go to a top engineering school and start my own software development company. That hasn’t changed. What you’ve read in my life plan is exactly what I wanted to do before I met you. I didn’t give up anything to be with you.”

“You can’t imagine how wonderful that makes me feel, Aaron. God, I love you so much, I can’t believe we met . . .” Brian started to cry as he tried to get his last sentence out. Soon both boys were locked in a tight embrace, crying on each other’s shoulders.

After their tears had subsided, Dr. Prentice said, “Well, I hate to end this at such an emotional point for the two of you, but I’m afraid our time’s up. I must tell you that I’ve really enjoyed working with you two and that these are great life plans. I must add though,” Dr. Prentice smiled, “that our sessions together have done a lot to enhance my own life plan. Let’s pick this up at our next visit.”

Brian and Aaron left the office smiling, with a new confidence in their relationship, knowing that their goals for the future were goals they would share together.

The swearing in ceremony for Aaron as senior class president was held that Friday in a general assembly for all of the student body officers. It was a real point of pride for Aaron and Brian, and for both his and Brian’s parents, who were also present. It was a very nice ceremony and Aaron held his head high as he took on the reigns of responsibility. Aaron Johnson, the shy, dejected kid who’d had to go with his parents to the movies just a year and a half earlier, was now the senior class president. A lot had happened over that time and he’d found love and endured tragedy. He’d realized he was gay, but found strength in it rather than adversity. From the way he handled himself, he gained respect - respect from his teachers, respect from his peers and even respect from his detractors. He’d even taken on the school board and, although he didn’t win, he’d found something inside of himself that he didn’t know he had. He found confidence, and courage.

Shortly after the end of the school year, it was time for Brian’s sixteenth birthday party. This time they invited Larry with his new girlfriend, Gail; Larry’s ex-girlfriend, Cindy, with her boyfriend, Steve; Aaron’s brother, Adam, and his girlfriend, Jenny; as well as their friends Scott and Jared, Sharon and Jackie, and Darren and Jeff from the GSA. Also making an appearance were Jamal, Brian’s friend from the rehab center, and his boyfriend, Corey; as well as Chad and the rest of the Jazz Ensemble.

Everyone had a great time eating cake and ice cream and dancing the night away. They even drank champagne - as per Brian’s parents rules - no beer and just four bottles of champagne for everyone, including the parents. Eventually, it was time to open the presents - Larry and Gail got him an iTunes gift card, Cindy and Steve got him a couple of DVD’s, Adam and Jenny got him a video game, Scott, Jared, Darren, Jeff, Sharon and Jackie all chipped in to get him and Aaron tickets to an upcoming Ben Folds concert, and Jamal and Corey got him an autographed copy of Marc Antoine’s Universal Language CD that they’d gotten on eBay.

“I just got you a little something,” Aaron said as he handed Brian a small, flat box. Brian opened the box to find a key with the prominent Honda logo on it. Brian looked up at Aaron with tears in his eyes.

“Sorry it’s not a new one, but you’re gonna need the car more than me, and I won’t need it at all when I go away to college. We can still ride together to school, but now that you got your license, you can drive yourself to therapy and your after school stuff . . . no more waiting around for me and shit . . . and I can always take the bus.”

“But Aaron, you’re the senior class president. You need a car.”

“Don’t sweat it, man. I can always catch a ride from someone else, or from you if I hafta, but more than anything, I want you to have the car. You deserve it and it gives me great pleasure to give it to you. We’ll go to motor vehicles tomorrow to change the title.”

“Are you sure, Aaron?”

“Baby, I’ve never been more sure. Every sixteen year-old should have a car. I had mine, and now I’m giving it to you. I love you more than anything and won’t take no for an answer.”

“Um, Aaron,” a voice came from out of the blue, “you really should have discussed this with us first,” Alan Sandler said.

“You’re not going to let me give Brian my car?” Aaron asked incredulously.

“You can give it to him if you wish, but he really doesn’t need two cars, now, does he?”

“Whatdaya mean?” Brian asked with a shocked expression on his face.

“Why don’t you take a look outside?”

With a growing sense of anticipation and apprehension, Brian wheeled himself out the front door. All he saw were his guests cars, parked in his driveway and in the street in front of his house.

Alan and June came up behind Brian, followed by all his friends. June put her hand on his shoulder and said, “You see that minivan across the street?” It was dark out, but Brian could easily see under the light of a streetlight, a dark red Chrysler Town and Country minivan, parked across the street.

“I thought that was Jamal’s.”

“I wish!” Jamal called out from behind him. “My parents and I are saving up to buy a used one.”

Alan extended his hand to reveal a set of car keys. “Why don’t you push this button, and watch what happens, Brian.”

Brian nervously wheeled himself up to the side of the van and did as he was told. Suddenly, the right side door of the van swung open and a ramp inside swung downward. The floor of the van was very low to the ground, so it was easy for Brian to wheel himself inside, which he did, with Aaron and Alan following close behind. There were two seats behind where he wheeled in, and two in the front of the van.

“Usually, they remove the driver’s seat so that you can wheel right up to the steering wheel, lock your wheelchair in place and drive away,” Alan explained. “We did some research, however, and found that most wheelchairs and wheelchair mounting systems don’t fare well at all in a crash. The way this van’s set up, you can wheel right up to the driver’s seat, swivel it around, transfer into it and lock your wheelchair behind the seat in all of about thirty seconds. With you going off to college in a couple of years, we thought that a minivan would be a lot more practical for you than a conventional car. It’ll allow you to get around campus more efficiently, wherever you go.”

“But I thought the trip was your present to me.”

“It was in part, but like Aaron said, every sixteen-year-old deserves a car.” Mr. Sandler turned around and said, “Although it was very generous of you to offer yours, Aaron, as you can see, Brian doesn’t need your car . . . and I think he’s right. As senior class president, you need your own car.”

“I’m sorry, Brian, but I didn’t get you anything else for your birthday.”

“Are you kidding me? In March you got me that incredible guitar on your birthday.” Aaron started to open his mouth, but Brian silenced him. “And don’t you tell me that it was a gift from all the members of the Jazz Ensemble. . . . I know you paid for more than half of it. Your share of it had to be several hundred dollars.”

Before Aaron could answer, they heard a car drive up and some car doors slam, followed by a familiar voice asking, “Excuse me, but is this the Sandler residence?”

Brian’s head shot up like lightening. “Billy! Billy, is that you?”

“Brian? I’m sorry we’re late, man, but our flight was delayed.”

Brian practically ran everyone over with his wheelchair as he rushed out of the van, just as the taxicab sped away. He threw his arms around Billy, and then around Chuck.

“I can’t believe you guys came all the way from Colorado, just for my birthday.”

“Who said anything about your birthday? We’re here to do some sightseeing in the city, and we thought we’d freeload off of you guys for the week.”

“Asshole,” Brian said as he punched Billy in the arm, just as Aaron managed to emerge from the minivan.

“Hey Billy . . . hey Chuck. I was beginning to wonder.”

“Sorry, man, but you know how it is with flight delays and all. A storm system in the Rockies and everything comes to a halt.”

“Hey, I’m just glad you made it,” Aaron said as he gave both Billy and Chuck a hug.

“You set this up, Aaron?” Brian asked.

“Yup. I had a feeling it would put a smile on your face.”

“And you said you didn’t get me anything for my birthday. . . .”

“Hey, we weren’t about to turn down Aaron’s invitation. We’re gonna have a blast! Like Billy said, we’re staying the week you know. Gotta make sure you and Aaron don’t get into any hanky-panky . . . at least not without us!”

“Man, we’re not into any of that four-way shit.”

“Speak for yourself, Aaron,” Brian said playfully to his boyfriend, causing him to blush deeply.

“So this is your new set of wheels?” Billy asked Brian.

“Yeah, my parents got it for my birthday. Check it out.”

Jamal was already inside, looking around. “This van is so cool! It has a built-in DVD player, a JBL sound system, built-in GPS navigation, power everything. This thing’s loaded.”

“Yeah, everyone, go ahead and take a look. Billy, Chuck, why don’t you grab your stuff and we’ll take it all inside, and then I can introduce you to everyone.”

After everyone had checked out Brian’s new van, they shuffled back inside, where Brian introduced them to Billy and Chuck. Brian’s mom got the Colorado boys some cake and ice cream that she had surreptitiously put away for them. Brian’s dad brought out a fifth bottle of champagne and they all celebrated a final birthday toast to Brian.

Billy told everyone about how Brian and Aaron had helped them come out to their parents. Chuck spoke with awe about how Brian had helped his father accept him for who he was.

“So how are things between you guys and your parents?” Aaron asked.

“Good . . .” Billy answered, “but different. I mean, before, there was an element of danger when Chuck and me used to do things, you know, like we might get caught, but it was kind of exciting. I wouldn’t want to go back to those days for anything, but now it’s kinda like, ‘You’re gonna spend the night with Chuck? That’s nice, dear. Don’t forget to use condoms.’ Having my parents talk about our sex life kinda takes the fun out of it . . . well, a little bit, anyways.”

“My folks are just plain being weird,” Chuck added. “My mom, on the one hand, has joined the local PFLAG chapter, but my dad’s kinda still in denial. Sometimes we’re sitting together on the couch watching a ball game, and he’ll just suddenly look at me and shake his head. It’s like, ‘He doesn’t look gay and he doesn’t act gay, so how can my son be gay?’ I know it freaks him out, but then he’ll suddenly throw his arm around me and tell me that he loves me.”

“How are things at school?” Brian asked.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, have you joined your school’s GSA? Do you have any other gay friends? You know, that sort of thing.”

“Our school doesn’t even have a GSA,” Billy replied dejectedly, “and if there are any other gay kids, they sure aren’t wearing rainbow flags or anything, but then neither are we.”

“Oh man, that sucks,” Brian said in sympathy.

“You know it,” Chuck chimed in.

Billy added, “We’d like to get a GSA started, but we’d have to come out to do it, and that has us petrified.”

“There may be a way to get one going without having to come out,” Aaron suggested.


“Go to your guidance counselors. Anything you tell them is confidential. They could go to the principal without having to say the request came from you, and maybe even get some teachers to help volunteer.”

“You know, that could actually work. We may try that when school starts up next fall.”

“It would be so cool if you did,” Aaron responded.

“But what if the our counselors or the principal turn out to be homophobic?” Chuck asked.

“I’ll tell you what, remind me later,” Aaron said, “but I know there are some great resources out on the net on starting a GSA. I think read something about ten steps to starting a GSA, and I even remember seeing something specific to high school, maybe from the ACLU or something. If it gets to that point, though, you may have to come out. I know that’s a big step, but sometimes it’s the only way to effect change. There are undoubtedly a lot of gay boys and girls at your school who could benefit. You may even save someone’s life.”

“Wow!” was all Billy could say at first. “When you put it that way, it sounds like we have an obligation to come out.”

“Only you guys can make that decision, Billy, Chuck, but we’ll be there for you every step of the way,” Brian added. “I mean, look around this room. There are eight totally out boys and girls here whose lives are much better than they might have been, were it not for our school’s GSA. Our school is huge, with close to 4000 students, and out of the hundreds of potential gay students, we have about 60 gay students in our GSA, about 20 of whom are out to the rest of the school. There are close to a hundred straight members of the GSA. The GSA provides a safe haven for gay students to be themselves, to have role models who are out and to see that there are straight teens who are accepting.”

“But don’t you worry that the straight members of your GSA might out some of the closeted gay kids?”

“That’s one of our fundamental ground rules,” Aaron answered. “Any student who deliberately outs a GSA member will not only be banned from the GSA, but by agreement with the student council and the school administration, they will banned from all extracurricular activities, including school sports, and face a mandatory two-week suspension. We had pushed for expulsion, but the principal thought that was too harsh, and I guess he was right. The thing to remember is that you need to set the ground rules from the start and get school backing for them to have any teeth.”

“You’ve given us food for thought. Billy and I will have a lot to talk about when we get back to Colorado!”

The boys ended up spending a lot of time catching up with each other, oblivious to the rest of their friends at the party. It came as a shock when Scott and Jared approached them to say their goodbyes. It was nearly two o’clock in the morning! The others soon did likewise, leaving only Billy, Chuck, Jamal and Corey.

“Why don’t you guys stay for the night?” Brian suggested to Jamal and Corey.

“We’d really hate to put you out, man.”

“You’d be putting us out if you didn’t stay the night, Jamal. You guys live too far from here to be out driving home at two AM.”

“Well, when you put it that way. I guess we could just crash right here in the great room,” Corey said, “but Jamal needs to sleep in a regular bed. He could never manage on the floor.”

“Don’t sweat it, man,” Billy chimed in. “We’ll sleep out here for the night and you and Jamal can have the guest room.”

“Hey,” Brian said, “Why don’t we all crash here in the great room together? It’d be cool . . . sorta like camping out. The sofa pulls out to a queen-size bed, and we have a couple of queen-size air mattresses everyone else could use.”

“What’ll you and Jamal do?” Billy asked.

“Brian blushed a bit and said, well, I guess we could share the sleeper sofa. That way we could transfer in and out of our wheelchairs without worrying about having to get down to the floor.”

“But you and Aaron should be together for your birthday,” Chuck said.

“It won’t make much of a difference, anyway. It’s not a bowel night, so Aaron and I can’t have sex tonight anyway. We might as well spend the night with our friends.”

“What do you mean it’s not a ‘bowel night’?” Chuck asked.

“Brian uses suppositories every other night to make his bowels move,” Aaron explained. “and then I give him an enema to get him cleaned out. That way I don’t have to worry about him having an accident when we make love.”

“What a lovely thought,” Billy added.

“So anyway, Brian and I were never going to have sex tonight in the first place. I think it would be fun to all have a group sleep-over.”

“Yeah, I think it’d be fun . . .” Jamal said, “. . . and besides, I’ve been wanting to sleep with Brian since I first saw him at the rehab center.”

“What?” Corey exclaimed.

“I’m just messing with you, babe. You know I only have eyes for your tiny white ass.” Jamal turned to Brian and said, “Sorry, Brian. It’s not that your not good looking, but you’re not my type. I’ve never been fond of long hair. No offense . . .”

“None taken . . . and I happen to know someone who loves my long hair.”

“You said it, sweetheart. I can never get enough of running my hands through those long, golden, silk strands.”

Brian wheeled over to his parents, who were busy cleaning up in the kitchen, to ask if the boys could all sleep in the great room. After proper assurances that they wouldn’t wreck the place, Brian’s parents agreed with the plan. They helped open the sleeper-sofa and inflated the air mattresses. June got out three sets of sheets and two extra sets of towels. Aaron, Corey, Billy and Chuck all helped her make the beds while Brian and Jamal headed to the bathrooms and started getting ready.

After everything was set up in the great room, Brian’s parents said their goodnight, and Aaron joined his boyfriend in the bathroom. He leaned down and kissed Brian briefly on the lips.

“Did you have a good time tonight?”

“I had a wonderful time, Aaron. I still can’t believe you were gonna give me your car . . . and I can’t believe my parents bought me that van! I never in a million years expected to get my own van.”

“It’s a really cool van, Brian. They really went all out. You must be pretty excited about driving it. . . . Hey, I just realized you haven’t even driven it yet.”

“I know. I was thinking about that, but when Billy and Chuck arrived, I was so excited about seeing them that I forgot all about driving my new van. I still can’t believe I forgot about it.”

“Tell you what, right after we eat breakfast tomorrow, we’ll take her for a spin . . . just the two of us.”

“You’ve got a date,” Brian agreed.

“Just don’t go off in your van and forget about me, now,” Aaron added.

“Honey, I’m excited about my van all right, but it won’t mean anything to me if you’re not there with me. I’d rather be with you in your car than drive the van by myself.”

“Brian, I’ll always be by your side, whatever set of wheels we use. You know that. I may be only seventeen, and you’re only sixteen, but I want to be with you forever. I want to have a commitment ceremony as soon as we’re old enough, and if we do end up in Boston, I want to legally marry you.”

Tears started to well up in Brian’s eyes as the reality of what Aaron had just said started to sink in. “You really do want to marry me?”

“Like I said before, it’s for better or for worse, man. I love you, Brian, more than anything in the world. Seventeen’s not too young to know you want to spend the rest of your life with someone.”

“Sixteen’s not, either,” Brian said as he reached up and pulled his lover’s face down to meet his own. Their tongues slipped inside each other’s mouths as their kiss took on a fiery intensity. After what seemed like an eternity, Aaron pulled away.

“We have guests and we really should get back out there.”

“Yeah, I guess . . .”

“Are you having second thoughts about inviting them to a ‘camp out’ in the great room?”

Brian smiled and said, “No, not at all. Let’s get back out there and keep them entertained.” Brian winked at Aaron as he started to get undressed. “I guess we should wear pajamas, though.”

“Well, Jamal and Corey would need pajamas, too, and I know you don’t have anything that could fit either of them.”

Brian laughed hysterically, thinking about how Jamal was a good foot taller than Aaron and Corey was a good foot shorter than either of them or so it seemed.

“Shall we go with boxers and T-shirts, then?” Brian suggested.

“Sounds like a good solution to me,” Aaron responded.

Stripped down to nothing but their boxers and donning some T-shirts, Aaron and Brian sauntered across the bedroom hall and knocked on the guest bedroom door. Hearing no answer, Aaron tentatively opened the door and called inside. Getting no response, he and Brian entered the room and approached the guest bathroom door, which was slightly ajar. Only then did they hear the distinct sound of moans, coming from inside.

“Jamal, are you in there?” Aaron called out.

They heard sounds of rustling around from inside, followed by the sounds of giggling before Jamal replied, “ Yeah, we’re in here. You can come in.”

Aaron tentatively pushed the bathroom door open and he and Brian were greeted by quite a sight. Corey was sitting in Jamal’s lap, facing him and with their arms draped around each other. They both appeared to be naked, with a large bath towel draped across both their laps. They both looked at Aaron and Brian as they entered the room.

“Interrupting a little hanky-panky?” Brian asked.

“Nothing you and Aaron wouldn’t be doing,” Corey replied.

“You two really look great together,” Aaron said.

“You don’t think we look weird?” Jamal asked. “I mean were a real ‘odd couple’.”

“You two look perfect together. I can see the love in your eyes.”

“Yeah?” Corey asked.

“Definitely,” Brian responded.

“Anyway, we came to tell you that we’re all going to wear boxers and T’s tonight, since we don’t have any pajamas that would fit either of you.” Aaron turned to Brian and said, “Why don’t we leave these two lovebirds alone so they can get dressed.”

“That’s OK . . . you can stay,” Corey said as he threw the towel off to reveal that he and Jamal both had their boxers on. “Gotcha, didn’t we?”

“You did have us going there for a millisecond or two,” Brian said as he winked. “Besides, I’ve already seen Jamal’s equipment.”

Even with his dark skin, Aaron, Brian and Corey could see that Jamal was blushing.

“Is there something you didn’t tell me about?” Corey asked his lover.

“You remember I told you about how Brian, er, ah . . . lent me a hand when I wasn’t sure if my . . . equipment worked.”

“Oh, right, I forgot about that,” Corey said. He turned to Brian and added, “Pretty impressive equipment, isn’t it?”

This time it was Brian who was blushing.

Corey jumped down from Jamal’s lap and started reaching for his shirt when Jamal asked Brian, “You wouldn’t mind if I didn’t wear my shirt, would you? Since my injury, I have a real problem with my body temperature. In the winter I have to bundle up and in the summer, I have to watch that I don’t get overheated. I usually don’t wear anything to bed and use only a thin sheet . . . otherwise I sweat like crazy.”

“It’s no problem with me. No one needs to wear a shirt if they don’t want to, for that matter.”

Cory set his shirt back down and shrugged his shoulders. The four of them then walked and wheeled as a group back out into the great room to find that Billy and Chuck were engaged in a pillow fight.

“C’mon guys, you might break something,” Brian reminded them.

They were also wearing only boxers and no shirts. Seeming to be overdressed, Aaron removed his shirt and tossed it aside. Not wanting to be the only one with a shirt, Brian followed suit. A pillow hit him in the face, just as he got his shirt off.

“I mean it, guys, knock it off!” Brian reiterated. “I’m the one who'll get yelled at.”

“Sorry, Brian,” Chuck said apologetically.

“OK, then, let’s kill the lights. Just a warning if you get up during the night, be careful not to trip over Jamal’s or my wheelchair. Oh, and also, I’ll be setting my watch to get up in four hours. I have to cath and turn myself. Do you have to get up to cath yourself, Jamal?”

“Nah, my bladder works fine, but I usually get up to pee when it’s time to turn myself, so I’ll get up with you.”

Brian and Jamal pulled their wheelchairs up on opposite sides of the sleeper-sofa and transferred effortlessly to their bed for the night. Everyone but Corey was surprised when Jamal literally stood up to transfer himself to the bed.

“You can stand?” Brian exclaimed.

“Only for a few seconds. I can’t take more than a step or two without my knees buckling. I have an incomplete injury . . . I’m only an ASIA C. I have some muscle function in my legs, but not enough to walk . . . believe me, my therapists and I have tried.”

“Still, that must make a real difference in what you can do. Being able to move your legs, even a little, lets you do so many things I can’t do.”

“Yeah, but you have full use of your hands. My zone of injury is right through my hands. I can’t even button a shirt without using a button hook, and I have to use a cuff to hold a spoon or a fork, or even a pen or pencil. They’re talking about maybe doing some tendon transfers that would at least give me enough function in my thumb to grasp and pinch, but it’s complicated surgery and I’d have each hand in a cast for many weeks while the tendons heal. I’ve been thinking about it, but I’m kinda scared to go through the whole surgery and rehab thing again.”

“I can’t blame you one bit,” Brian said, understanding what Jamal meant better than anyone else.

Aaron killed the last of the lights, and then climbed in bed with Corey. He pulled the top sheet and blanket up and tucked them into the space between his head and his shoulder, and turned away from Corey, managing to uncover Corey in the process.

“Hey! I need some of that,” he said quietly.

“Oh, sorry,” Aaron said, apologizing as he turned back to face Corey instead. “I didn’t mean to leave you ‘exposed’, so to speak.”

“It’s no problem . . . and thanks for being so understanding about Brian’s helping Jamal out.”

“I’m glad he was able to help. . . . so, Jamal’s . . . er . . . large?”

“Yeah . . .” Aaron could almost hear Corey blushing with his answer. Corey continued, “His cock is pretty huge alright. I know there’s that stereotype about African American’s having big dicks, but Jamal’s a big guy. He’s six-nine, you know.”

“I didn’t know, but I figured he had to be pretty tall. Until he stood tonight, I never new just how tall, however. I bet he musta been pretty good at basketball.”

“You’d think so, but that’s not Jamal. Yeah, he liked to shoot hoops and he was good at it, but it wasn’t really his thing. You know what he wants to be? He want’s to be a pediatrician. He has a heart of gold and he’s kind and loving. Sure, I like it that he has a big dick, but I absolutely love him. I love who he is and how he makes me feel. I may be a foot-and-a-half shorter than him, but he makes me feel ten feet tall.”

“That’s really sweet. You know, Corey, I’ve been meaning to ask you . . . When I met Brian, it was before he was in a wheelchair. You met Jamal after he was already paralyzed. I’m not saying I wouldn’t have fallen in love with Brian if he’d already been paralyzed when I met him, but to be honest, the wheelchair would have been a major obstacle. It’s pretty hard to look past it, and yet you did.”

“Well I have to admit, Aaron, that I’d had my eyes on Jamal long before the accident, so it’s not like I didn’t know him before, too. I just didn’t think he could ever be interested in me, of all people. I knew I was gay, but I never in a million years thought he could be gay, too. When I heard about the accident, I was crushed. When he returned to school in that wheelchair, I felt sorry for him, but I also admired his courage. Of course, later he told me that there’s nothing courageous about being in a wheelchair . . . when you’re injured, you do what you have to do . . . but at the time I couldn’t help but admire him. I just couldn’t believe it when he approached me and, well, you know the rest.”

“How did Jamal injure himself, anyway?”

“It was a freak diving accident. He was swimming in gym class and he dove in too steep, and hit his head on the bottom of the pool. He’s so tall, he should have never been diving into the shallower end of the pool. The swimming coach knew just what to do, or it could have been much worse.”

“Wow. I never thought swimming could be so dangerous.”

“Neither did I, but we can’t change what’s already happened. All I know is I love him just the way he is.”

“Hey, do you think you could quiet it down a bit?” Billy from whispered across the room.

“Sorry ’bout that, Billy,” Aaron apologized.

Turning back to his lover, Billy continued the conversation he’d been quietly been having with Chuck. “I still can’t get over Jamal and Corey. I woulda never pictured them bein’ together.”

“Yeah, I know what you mean. I don’t know too many interracial couples, let alone a gay couple, but the size difference is intimidating. I wonder who’s the bottom.”

“Corey is. I overheard Jamal talking to Brian. He said that Corey is a total bottom.”

“Man, can you imagine the logistics of how they make love?” Chuck asked in wonder.

“I wonder how they do it, with Jamal being paralyzed and all.”

“Whoa, I hadn’t thought of that!” Chuck whispered. “I guess the missionary position isn’t exactly practical for them.”

“Prolly not,” Billy mused. “I’m guessing Corey must sit down on Jamal. That would give him control and he could do all the work while Jamal caresses him.”

“Yeah, I bet you’re right. Maybe we could ask them.”

“Are you crazy?”

“Nah, just curious, but I bet they wouldn’t mind us asking,” Chuck replied.

“I s’pose you’re right.”

“It’s kinda weird bein’ in the room with two guys in wheelchairs, don’cha think?”

“Maybe a little bit, but Brian’s a great guy, and Jamal seems really nice, too.”

“Would you still love me if I was in a wheelchair?” Chuck asked.

“No way, I’d dump you in a second.”


“I’m just kidding you. You know I’d still love you. I’ll be there with you, no matter what, through thick and then some, until we’re so old, our dicks fall off,” Billy added with a chuckle.

“Same here, babe. I wouldn’t care if you were paralyzed, or missing an arm or a leg, or if you weighted 300 pounds. I love you, Billy. I’ll always love you.”

“Good answer.”

“Hey guys, could you hush up? We’re trying to sleep up here,” Brian asked.

“Sorry about that, Brian. We’ll be good.”

“You’d better be,” Brian chuckled as he turned back to face Jamal.

“Thanks again for coming to my party, Jamal.”

“Hey, man, I wouldn’ta missed if for anything in the world.”

“Well Aaron and I are glad you came.”

“Brian, I know you probably don’t want to talk about it, but I got real depressed for a while after I got home from the rehab center. I never really thought about committing suicide, but if things hadn’t started to get better, I could see having gotten to that point.”

“Man, that’s a heavy topic, Jamal. I know that everyone tried to prepare me for life in the real world, but I don’t think any amount of rehab can prepare you for what happens after you go home.”

“You sure got that right. Corey was the one thing that made it all worthwhile. I don’t know what would’a happened if Corey and I had been together before the accident, like you and Aaron were. I didn’t find out until later that he’d been crushing on me for a while. But the way he accepted me in my wheelchair, right from the start, made it a lot easier. I never second-guessed his love for me. . . . he fell in love with me the way I am.”

“That Aaron and I were already together had a lot to do with my trying to kill myself. I just couldn’t accept that he could still be attracted to me . . . that he could still love me. I tried to convince myself that what we had was still the same afterwards, but there was always that nagging doubt in the back of my head. When I got the syrinx, I just lost it. At first, things actually got worse after the surgery. I just couldn’t see the positives in my life anymore and I pushed Aaron away. Here he was, this loving, caring boyfriend and all I could think was that he stuck with me out of guilt . . . guilt from being the driver, and guilt that he wasn’t the one who was paralyzed. I thought he felt sorry for me.

“When I got to that point in my life, I just couldn’t stand to be around him . . . it hurt too much . . . and so I broke up with him. Of course I never stopped loving him, and when he started dating again, I knew my life would never be the same. I’d never really come to terms with being in a wheelchair, and losing Aaron was the last straw.”

“Well thank God you didn’t succeed.”

“I have Aaron to thank for that . . . and God, I guess. I would have never pulled through without Aaron’s love. After all we’ve been through, I know we’re in it for life. We talked about it earlier, when we were getting ready for bed. We definitely intend to have a commitment ceremony when we’re old enough, prolly when I graduate high school. We even talked about getting married if we ever live somewhere where it’s legal.”

“Corey and I already have our commitment rings.”


“Yeah. For now we wear them on chains around our necks”

“So that’s what those are!”

“Yup. We’ve already set the date. The day after our high school graduation, we’re gonna tie the knot.”

“That is so cool! I’ll have to talk to Aaron about maybe getting our commitment rings to wear around our necks, too.”

“That ID bracelet you wear is way cool.”

“Yeah,” Brian said with an almost dreamy gaze. “It’s hands-down my most treasured possession. I can’t believe I gave it back to Aaron when we split, but it was too painful to look at back then. This bracelet says it all,” Brian said as he held up his right arm to show it off. “It says I’m gay, I’m out, I’m proud and I love the most wonderful boy around.”

“Shit, it’s already getting light outside.”

“Damn, that means it’s probably only a couple hours until I have to get up to cath myself.”

“Is there any reason you couldn’t cath yourself right now? That’d at least give us four uninterrupted hours of sleep.”

“Yeah, I don’t suppose there’s any reason I couldn’t. OK, let’s get up now, and then we can reset the alarm for four hours from now.”

“I might as well get up, too,” Aaron said from the floor below. “I have to piss anyway.”

“Same here,” Corey chimed in.

Brian and Jamal each transferred effortlessly to their respective wheelchairs, and their boyfriends followed them to their separate bathrooms.

Once they were alone in Brian’s bathroom, Aaron leaned over and gave Brian a passionate kiss.

“Mmm, that was nice,” Brian responded.

“I’ll never get enough of you, my love. Why don’t you get out your cath supplies and I’ll help cath you.”

“Do you still get aroused from cathing me, Aaron?”

“Yeah, I do. It may sound weird, but it’s something very personal and intimate that we can share that isn’t at all sexual. I enjoy the intimacy, and can’t help but get aroused.”

After Aaron had finished draining Brian’s bladder, Aaron cleaned up as Brian wheeled himself out into his bedroom with his dick still sticking out the fly in his boxers. By the time Aaron finished up, he exited the bathroom to find Brian sprawled out on his bed, wearing nothing but his beautiful, sweet smile. Aaron walked over to his lover and leaned over to give him a kiss.

“You know, this isn’t a bowel night,” Aaron said.

“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean we can’t have some fun. As long as we’re careful not to do anything that might kick off a bowel movement, we should be safe and, besides, I enjoy pleasuring you as much as having you pleasure me. . . . So what are you waiting for? Get those boxers off and lie next to me.”

“Yes sir,” Aaron saluted as he complied with the birthday boy’s wishes. Aaron kissed his boyfriend, opening his mouth and allowing his tongue to duel with Brian’s for supremacy. They kissed passionately for several minutes before Brian broke the kiss and started licking at the diamond stud in Aaron’s right ear - the same one he’d given Aaron for his sixteenth birthday.

Aaron took over the initiative by licking his way down Brian’s jaw line and his chest, landing his lips squarely on Brian’s right nipple as he tweaked Brian’s left nipple.

After a few minutes of this, Brian cried out, “Aaron, please. I love what you’re doing, but any more of this and I might have an accident.”

Recognizing the potential risk, Aaron backed off and returned to sucking on Brian’s mouth. After some more kissing, Brian backed off and asked, “Aaron, would you scoot up in bed a little so I can get to your nipples?”

“Sure, honey,” Aaron said as he complied. Since Brian had no use of his legs and limited use of his trunk muscles, the boys had long ago learned that it was much easier for Aaron to do most of the moving, leaving Brian more energy for the stuff that counted.

Brian started licking and nipping first one nipple and then the other, noticing for the first time the presence of a few short hairs around each nipple. He licked his way down Aaron’s chest and abdomen, swirling his tongue around and into Aaron’s navel. He licked his way down Aaron’s light treasure trail and inhaled deeply when he reached Aaron’s bush. Aaron responded by flipping himself around so that he could enjoy the smell of Brian’s own equipment as Brian went to work on pleasuring Aaron.

Aaron inhaled deeply as he nestled his face in Brian’s groin, burying his nose in the space between Brian’s thigh and his ball sack. Aaron lovingly caressed Brian’s dick, holding it against his cheek. He knew Brian couldn’t feel it, but he knew that the thought of this was a major turn-on for Brian.

Brian spread Aaron’s legs wide and licked his way from Aaron’s perineum to his crack. He rimmed Aaron and plunged his tongue deep inside. Aaron gasped. Brian thrust his tongue in and out of Aaron’s anus, nearly causing Aaron to lose it. Brian pulled back, only to insert his finger deep inside, where he rubbed it against Aaron’s prostate. Copious precum flowed from Aaron’s dick, spilling out over Brian’s zone of injury.

Brian plunged down over Aaron’s dick, taking it deep into his throat and applying vigorous suction. He slowly built up a rhythm, going up and down Aaron’s member as Aaron thrust in and out of Brian’s mouth. It didn’t take long - Aaron’s balls drew up tight against his body as his orgasm overwhelmed his senses.

After coming down from his high, Aaron flipped himself back over and kissed his lover, sharing in the taste of his seed. He snuggled up with Brian - Brian lying on his back and Aaron lying partly on top of him. They fell asleep almost instantly, and this was the position June found them in a few hours later. They’d left the door ajar without realizing it and she’d only been checking to make sure they were alright.

Seeing her two ‘sons’ lying there, sleeping peacefully, made her heart sing. That they were naked somehow seemed natural to her. She knew it was anything but innocent and, yet, it seemed to embody the very essence of innocence. She realized at that moment, that the sex they shared was nothing more than a natural expression of their love for each other, and that trying to put a stop to it had not only been naïve, but futile. She smiled at the peacefulness she saw on her son’s face - it was such a contrast to the look that had been on his face from the time of the accident until his suicide attempt. Her boy was happy, and that made her happy.

Closing the door behind her as she exited back out into the hall, she checked the guestroom door to find it closed, and decided against knocking or opening it. She continued out into the great room, where she found Billy and Chuck, fast asleep on the sofa sleeper. So much for ‘camping out’ in the great room, she thought to herself with a smile. In the end, they had ended up sleeping as couples.

Quietly getting back into bed, she attempted to settle down onto her pillow without waking her husband. She knew she had failed when Alan asked her with a smile, “So do we still have a great room, or is the place trashed?”

June recalled to Alan what she had found when she went to check on the boys. She told him about how natural Brian and Aaron looked together and how happy it made her feel to see them together.

“So they left the door open? I guess that explains why they seemed to be extra loud this morning.”

June laughed as she recalled hearing Aaron’s moans. “You’d better not tell them we can hear them, either, Alan. It would embarrass them to no end.”

“I won’t tell them. I was once sixteen myself, you know.”

“Oh, don’t I know it. Do you think our parents heard us that time?”

“God, I hope not,” Alan replied.

“Honey, I don’t doubt your love in the least, but do you ever wish you’d lived the life Brian has now?”

“Like I told the boys, I have absolutely no regrets. Back then I thought homosexuality was evil and the feelings I had were evil. If I had acted on my feelings, my parents would have killed me, and I don’t mean figuratively. I got lucky . . . I found a remarkable girl who managed to make me feel loved and who managed to arouse me, even as I found myself attracted more to boys. I think it all worked out fine in the end.”

“I do, too. If you couldn’t be gay back then and had to be straight, I’m glad I was able to provide you with the love you deserved. I got lucky, too. You have been nothing but a wonderful husband and father. I’m just glad that Brian doesn’t have to suffer the way you did. I only wish he could have avoided all the pain he’s experienced in the past couple of years.”

“I’d give anything for Brian to be able to walk again, but if the price of that were to take anything away from what he has now, it wouldn’t be worth it.”

“Yes, I know, but I wish he hadn’t had to suffer so much as he did.”

“If it weren’t for that suffering, neither Brian, nor Aaron, would be the wonderful young men they are today.”

“How so?”

“Well, if Brian had never met Aaron in the first place, the accident would have never happened, but Brian would have still been gay. Who knows how long it would have taken for him to accept himself had it not been for Aaron’s influence. Without that, our boy would have been lost.

“Had he met Aaron, but had they not gone to the GSA dance, they would have never met their good friends. He and Aaron would have probably stayed in the closet, perhaps indefinitely, sneaking around behind our backs and very likely getting into mischief.

“Had they gone to GSA dance and been found out by us, but had Jackie’s father not had his ‘heart attack’, our boys would have probably gotten away with their deception. Emboldened by this, they would have likely continued to deceive us, heaping lie upon lie to carry it off. With each lie, a small part of their honesty would have slipped away, making lying easier and easier until it became effortless. As lying became easy, other types of dishonesty would have probably followed. Our boys wouldn’t have been the same.

“Had the accident occurred, but if the timing had been different, the drunk driver might have hit the side of Aaron’s car squarely, probably sparing Brian, but leaving Aaron with a severe brain injury, or killing him outright. I shudder at the thought of what that would have done to Brian. We would have known he was gay, and so he’d have lost our support and Aaron’s at the same time. He might well have ended up committing suicide.

“Had the accident occurred as it did, but had Ruth not spoken to you or had you not been astute enough to figure out that the problem was my sexuality, we would have probably taken Brian to Atlanta for his rehab and perhaps even moved away from here. Again, Brian would have lost us and lost Aaron.

“Had everything happened as it did, but had Brian not developed the syrinx, he might never have come to terms with his disability. His depression would have festered, slowly eroding him from the inside until he ultimately couldn’t live with it any more. Again, he might well have attempted suicide, and perhaps succeeded.

“And if Brian hadn’t attempted suicide, neither he nor Aaron would have realized just how much they loved each other and needed each other.

“So in the end, Brian and Aaron are very much who they are because of the events of the last two years,” Alan concluded.

“You know, I would have never thought of it that way, but I think you’re right. I know they’re young, but I sure hope they make it.”

“We did.”

“You’re right, Alan, we did at that . . . and something tells me that our boys are going to make it, too.”


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I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.

31. Afterword

Love in a Chair

A story by Altimexis


Thanks for reading this, my first attempt at gay fiction. I hope you liked the story and that it touched you in some way. I wrote this at a time when I was just coming to terms with my own sexuality, even though I was well into middle age. There’s a bit of me in many of the characters, from Aaron’s early shy and confused nature to Dr. Stevens’ approach to helping kids with spinal cord injury. My own story most closely resembles Alan Sandler’s - although I’m not very religious, I grew up with the belief that homosexuality was a psychiatric disorder. No one wants to believe they’re sick, so I just assumed that I didn’t have to be gay if I didn’t want to be - that I could “cure” it on my own. I knew I had strong feelings for boys when I was no more than ten. The closest I ever came to a sexual encounter was when I was twelve and coerced my best friend, who was eleven, to get naked with me and feel each other up.

If I had it to do over again, would I change things? Well, it’s hard to say. The grim reality is that if I had acted on my desires, I might well have died of AIDS. In any case, what might have been is irrelevant - I can’t go back and relive my life and I couldn’t be happier with the one I live now. I love my wife deeply and we have a satisfying relationship that has lasted more than two decades and even withstood my coming out to her.

So what was the impetus for writing Love in a Chair? I’ve read a lot of gay fiction on the Internet and have been impressed by the quality and depth of the writing from several outstanding authors. Sadly, only a few stories have dealt with people with disabilities, and those that have often portray them as helpless, or fail to acknowlege the difficulties they do in fact face. Even men with complete spinal cord injuries such as Brian’s can have satisfying sexual experiences - not always as normal as what I portrayed here, but satisfying nonetheless. They can even father children, with a little help from modern medical technology.

Now there are a couple of good stories out there that I am aware of that deal with gay teens with disabilities. Neither of them deals with a disability that impairs sexual function as in Brian’s case, but they are still very good stories and I can highly recommend them. The first is Tim by Cole Parker, in which the main character’s boyfriend has brittle bone disease and is largely wheelchair-bound. The second is Just Hit Send by Grasshopper. It deals with the love between two fifteen-year-olds, one of whom was struck by a car when he was very young. The story does particularly well at dealing with the feelings of inadequacy that develop over time and how they affect the relationship. Both of these stories are must-reads.

Some may undoubtedly wonder why I wrote Love in a Chair primarily from Aaron’s point of view, rather than Brian’s. One of the reasons is that, although I’ve worked with paraplegics most of my adult life, I am not myself a paraplegic. No matter how intimately knowledgeable I may be on the subject, I cannot possibly know what it feels like to be in Brian’s shoes. Perhaps more importantly, a story written from Brian’s perspective in its entirety would have been incredibly intense. Consider Chapter Twelve, which was told from Brian’s viewpoint when he was in intensive care, multiply that by twenty times and one can see how the story might have been overwhelming.

Thanks for reading Love in a Chair. Again I would like to thank WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, Trab for his proofreading and Captain Rick for providing incomparable advice on the legal aspects of the plot. There are a number of other people I would like to thank for their feedback on the story, not the least of which are C James, Rigel and Bondwriter, as well as all the folks who have taken the time to provide feed back through my forum, or e-mail me their comments. I am thankful to Nifty and the Rainbow Community Writing Project for hosting the original version of Love in a Chair. I am also indebted to Gay Authors and Awesome Dude for hosting this and my other stories.

I hope that I have been true to my word and that you learned something from this story, and will never look at sex in quite the same way again.

A single red rose lies on the seat of a wheelchair

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My Other Stories

I would like to thank Riley James, WriteByMyself and David of Hope for their editing skills and invaluable suggestions, and Trab for his proofreading. This story can be found at Gay Authors and Awesome Dude. It was originally hosted at Nifty and at the Rainbow Community Writing Project. I am greatful to all of these sites for hosting this and my other stories.