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Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

The Secret Life of Billy Chase 6 - 43. Chapter 43

Wednesday



- You know....I jacked off this morning while thinking about Sam's dick in my mouth. I have to admit, I kinda miss the taste of him. It's only been a few days, but God...I'm horny for him all over again. I wish he'd stop being such a jackass and CALL me already! I need some lovin'. He's gonna screw around and miss out if he keeps being so stubborn about this.

And to think, he's the one who practically flipped out when Joanna stopped showing him the proper affection.

We had a fire drill today. Dumbest thing ever. They make each and every kid in the whole school get up and walk out to the front lawn...wait for, like, ten minutes, and then go back inside. It's just this total disruption in my day, you know? Like...'great, now I have to go back and think about math for the last six minutes of class after being pulled away from the equations I was working on'. Wonderful.

But I did hear someone calling my name from behind as we were standing out there, and I saw Ian giving me a wave. I went over to say hi, and he basically feels the same way that I do about the fire drill disaster. A real fire might be more entertaining.

I was like, "I wonder what they would do if all the students just left. Hehehe, like if we all just got frustrated and walked away. What would they do? They can't suspend everybody. And there isn't a detention hall big enough to hold us all at once."

Ian said, "Nah, they'd probably haul us all into the gym and detain us on the bleachers. They'd find a way. Good idea though."

I saw him holding a notebook, and it looked like he had a ton of notes scribbled out on the page, along with some stick figure drawings in little boxes. I asked him, "What class is that for?"

He's like, "What? This? Oh...this isn't for a class. It's for the little movie that I wanna make once I get enough money to buy my camera this Summer." The cutest little smile came to his face, and he showed it to me. "Check it out! I'm only about half way through, but I'll be finished soon. I guess you could say that I had a burst of inspiration in the middle of my Spanish class."

I saw guns and explosions and fight scenes on the page and in the descriptions. I said, "Hehehe, it's a little 'ambitious' for a home video, don't ya think?"

He's like, "Hey...gotta think big, right? The details of how to pull it off will come later. Besides, there are a few computer programs that make just about anything possible." Ian paused for a second, then he's like..."Say, I wrote the whole storyline out. Do you wanna read it? I'd love to know what you think of it."

He seemed so anxious about it. I said, "Well...yeah, sure. I'll look at it."

He said, "AWESOME! I need an objective eye." He was already digging around in his backpack for it.

I asked, "Why don't you let Bobby read it?"

He said, "I gave him a copy of it."

I'm like, "What did he say?"

Ian's all like, "He said what he always says whenever I give him something I worked on. Nothing." Arrrgh! That Bobby's getting a punch in the gut the next time I see him! Ian said, "I don't know if he even reads my stuff. But, Billy, if you could just let me know what you think, it would mean the WORLD to me, dude! I kinda live for feedback. Hehehe, what can I say? I'm an artist. I'd rather be deprived of oxygen than feedback."

I smiled, and I think Ian blushed a little bit. You know, I've been trying not to notice for Bobby's sake...but Ian is...really cool. I felt a little bit of a flutter in my stomach. It went away, but his smile is...'pretty'.

Don't worry. I've been down that road before. I know a passing infatuation when I feel one. But....if Bobby and Ian don't work out, which...it looks like they won't...it might be nice to spend a few nights together. Hehehe, just saying. I'd give him a good slobber-sucking! Bobby's too scared to have a boyfriend right now. He should have a few mindless hook ups or something first. Something without any emotional commitment. He can't handle someone like Ian. He's too cute and sweet and Bobby's just wrecking everything. Until he grows a pair and goes for it...I say that Ian's free game. So why not?

We were getting ready to go back inside, and Ian was saying goodbye to me, but I stopped him and asked, "Say...why don't you give me your phone number? I've got a lot of homework tonight, but...I can call you tomorrow and let you know what I think."

He seemed surprised. He's like, "Tomorrow? Hehehe, that'll be quick. I don't think I've ever had someone who wanted to give me their comments on my writing before."

I gave him a flirtatious grin and said, "Well, maybe you're just special then. Hehehe, here. Here's a pen." He wrote down his number for me and we shared another smile before parting ways. That boy looks like such a mouthful. Seriously. It just shows in his build. He's got these broad shoulders and strong legs. You can kinda tell. I think I'm actually salivating right now just thinking about it. I'm not gonna pounce on him or anything. His personality and good looks just...ake me kinda curious. That's all. Hehehe! No harm in that.

Speaking of curious...I saw something in the hallway that intrigued me. Evidently, Stevie's little run-in with the bullies on the stairs the other day was a bit worse off than I could have expected. His face was bashed up pretty badly. He had one hell of a shiner over his left eye, a busted lip, and a bruised cheek. Not so 'pretty' NOW, are you, Stevie? Hey, don't blame me. Blame karma. He had this coming the first time he tried to turn Brandon against me.

I saw Brandon trying to talk to him, but Stevie wouldn't even look him in the eye. I think Brandon was just trying to be nice and comfort him in some weird way. Can't understand why. They're broken up? Why should he care if Stevie took a dive down a flight of steps or not? I don't.

Anyway, at one point, Brandon tried to put a hand on Stevie's shoulder, and Stevie swatted it away. He said, "Don't touch me. Please, don't touch me. Ok?"

And Brandon was like, "Let me help you. Come on, I'm not that heartless."

Stevie's like, "I don't need you to feel any pity for me. Don't waste your energy on me to keep from feeling guilty..."

Brandon told him, "This is NOT about me. Jesus, at least let me take you by the nurse's office or something."

But Stevie kept resisting him, and when he saw me in the hall, he rolled his eyes and walked away in the other direction. Was that supposed to make me feel bad? I certainly hope not. I couldn't give a fuck if he PAID me. Then Brandon came walking towards me, and I really didn't to hear it. So I did exactly what Stevie did. I rolled my eyes, and I walked away. That whole situation has nothing to do with me. I've got better things to worry about. Stevie obviously doesn't want help, and Brandon is obviously still 'attached' to him in some way. So being around either one of them is not going to benefit me in any way. And I'm done dealing with things that don't benefit me. Let them work things out on their own. I always had to do it alone. Now it's their turn. Grow up.

Before leaving for the day, you know what Simon said to me? He actually caught up to me at my locker, and he started by asking me if I had seen Trace. I was like, "No. Trace doesn't feel like talking to me anymore for some reason."

Simon was a bit shocked by my answer, I think. He was like, "It's just...he hasn't shown up for his tutoring sessions the last few days. I was wondering what happened. I can't really keep checking him off on my sheet if he doesn't show up..."

I shrugged my shoulders and said, "I don't know what to tell you, Simon. Like I said, he doesn't talk to me. So he's not my problem."

Simon squinted his eyes a bit, and he's like, "What's going on with you? What's happening here?"

I said, "Nothing. You asked me a question, I answered it. What else do you want?"

He's like, "You can stop with the 'force field', Billy. You know that doesn't work with me. Come on, talk to me. This isn't like you at all."

I was frustrated. I just wanted to leave and go home already. AGAIN...none of this was to my benefit. Simon has a problem, Trace has a problem...I don't. So why am I being dragged into this? I said, "I've got an idea...why don't you leave me alone, and go find him yourself. He's got a phone number, you know? How hard is it to call him and find out what's going on with him instead of bugging me about it?"

Simon was slightly appalled by the comment, but he just adjusted his glasses, and said, "Sorry if I 'bothered' you. Listen, when you're done being an asshole, maybe you can talk to me like a normal person."

I said, "Yeah. Great. Fuck you too." Everybody's got an opinion. Like I owe Simon anything. The second he got himself a girlfriend, he vanished on me. It's not like we were hanging out every few days like we used to. If he never talked to me again, how much would I really miss out on? I swear, I need to start my whole circle of friends over from scratch. The ones I had before just aren't doing it for me anymore.

Anyway...I'm gonna go. I'm horny. I'm gonna write Lee an email and see if he can hang out just in case Randall doesn't write me back in time for this weekend. I need some sex. Ugh! Hell, since Jimmy was so self righteous about telling me that I'm basically becoming a slut, I wonder what he would say if I went over to his house and made him an offer. Would he say no? Somehow, I doubt that.

As a species, we're all damaged goods. Why pretend not to be? It's exhausting.

I think I'm more interested in reading Ian's story for his big Summer movie than I am in doing my homework. I think I'm gonna lay back and check that out instead. (While picturing him naked! Hehehe!)

Gotta run! I'll write more later....

-Billy

Copyright © 2012 Comicality; All Rights Reserved.
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Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

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I hope Billy goes back to his normal self soon before he loses all his friends. I really hate selfish Billy!

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Oh no! I know you've already heard this out but I don't like the new Billy too much. Hope he gets out of this phase soon....but I will keep reading.

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I'm starting to dislike this for the same reason I hated "Catcher in the Rye": an annoyingly self-righteous cynical narrator. I still love your stories though.

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I don't think I could ever find it in me to dislike Billy but I'll sure be glad to see his usual, lovable and likeable self return.

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i totally disagree with the below. i think its great that Billy has turned this way...hopefully it wont last and he will turn back into the sweet Billy we all know and love, but come on he's what 14/15 and no kid is THAT nice all the time. We all go throught / went through stages of being complete pricks so give Comsie a break and let him ecxplore this horrible selfish side of Billy, until something bad happens to him and Im sure the sweet Billy will be back.

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I like the Billy-turns-to-selfishness story arc as well. However, I never liked him much to begin with. I don't see how everybody keeps saying he was so nice all the time. He did do some good things now and then, but... he did a bunch of bad things too. I certainly don't think he's too good to believe. At some point, I almost went the opposite way. However, I find the current stage he's going through very believable. I never went through quite the same thing, but I remember there was some time where I went through life fantasizing that all girls and women were part of some evil conspiracy, for example. And there was a time where I suddenly realized that there is a logic and constancy to the world that I had apparently forgotten about—or maybe it just felt that way when I came out of it, like when you come out of a dream or something. My point is, people go through weird phases sometimes, and I find Billy's current one very believable. Likeable or otherwise.

Another thing I like about is that this is giving some of the other main characters a chance to really shine by showing concern (Jimmy, last chapter), or annoyance (Simon, this chapter) or hurt feelings (Sam, recently). I already liked all of these characters, but they've grown on me even more, now.

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Billy's gone to the gay dark side of the force!!!!

 

The author needs to rewrite a lot of Billy's ramblings, because some things he has Billy say is just out of character.  Billy's not dumb based on everything and the author has him say some of the stupid things.  It really screws with the credibility of the character, and turns people off to reading.

 

Edited by emirikol
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Billy has done things that infuriated me. I struggled a lot more with his believability as a character before than I do now. Not in this arc. I remember his interactions with other people and he doesn't particularly seem unreasonable, at least on the surface. When he told Sam and Jimmy what he thought about their actions versus how they expected him to act, and when he mentioned how Simon went away after he got a girlfriend, all I could think about was, “Where's the lie?”

I mean, we all know this is short-sighted and this new persona will crash and burn, and I hope when he stops with the bullshit he'll be horrified by what he's been doing. Not the casual sex part, the hurting people and not caring part.

We should keep in mind that this is his journal. He's the one writing it. We don't get to read about what really happened, only how Billy understood what happened. If he is lying to himself, if this not caring thing is just an act, it makes sense that he wouldn't suddenly come clean and become objective every night while writing in his journal.

My problem with him was never that he didn't care. It was more that he didn't seem to be able not to do the wrong things despite knowing and worrying that he shouldn't be doing them. So I don't buy it for a second that he was able to just turn that off in an instant. He is lying to himself, and we don't have an objective third-person narrator to tell us that, so we have to infer that for ourselves.

I don't see this as the actual arc. This is the setup. I think the “meat” of the arc is Billy dealing with the consequences of this selfish phase, and rebuilding his relationships, and gaining understanding as to why he may have misread some situations (and considering where we are now it could end up being an important part of the next book). Of course, we can't get to that part without going through him doing the bad things and damaging the relationships and misreading the situations first, and that's where we're at. Or I'm totally wrong and this is the main part and once he goes back to normal people will forgive him over a couple of chapters.

The thing I do worry about is that despite my belief that it's an act, it's still how he's acting, and his actions, towards these particular people, aren't something I'd want to take a lot of time reading about. I'm not saying it's a good thing or a bad thing, but sometimes things in this series take a while to happen. I guess that's the sometimes advantage, sometimes disadvantage of the premise of having a chapter for each and every day of in-universe time.

Here's an extreme analogy: I have read a lot of stories with kids being abused. But if I came across a story like that, with abuse going on, in detail, for several chapters straight, and it were told from the point of view of the abuser, I'm pretty sure I would drop it. Even if I had reason to believe that the abuser would get his due (which is the payoff that motivates me to read such stories in the first place), there's only so much I'm willing to stomach (and/or time I'm willing to spend) reading through until it gets to that part.

There is an example of that in this very series: when Billy was cheating on Brandon with Bobby. I just skimmed over Billy and Bobby's interactions in that arc. I didn't have the stomach (or rather the calmness) to read them in full. Of course, there's only so much skimming I am willing to do before dropping a story altogether, but for me it didn't quite get to that point (obviously, since I'm still here).

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