I've been asked out on a date with Perez. Perez just isn't normally the type of guy i date. I mean, I don't really have a type, but he is a bit different than even every other guy I've dated. I just don't get him.
Alright, I’ll admit it; I went out with Perez because he had hounded me for weeks. I mean it wasn’t like I had anyone else who was asking. But I mean it was Perez, for Christ’s sake.
Look I know I am not a prize, but it was nice to have someone actually come after me to go out. I usually say I don’t have a type but Perez stretched that to its breaking point. We had to look like Mutt and Jeff walking out together.
Face it; I’m six foot and nearly two hundred pounds. When you add in my age, well I don’t exactly measure up to most of the guys at the bars. Then there was Perez. You have to realize I’ve never dated anyone that small. He was five foot four, with dark skin, brown eyes, and he was smooth shaven. His body was tight and he had a cute little butt. Hell even his hair was cut short and tight. I wasn’t immune to his charms, that is for sure. He had perfect white teeth against his deep pink lips. I could almost taste them. He might have been short but he knew he was hot and walked like a giant.
He told me he was an artist. I know it should have set off alarm bells. I mean hell I was barely making ends meet with my job as a consultant, never mind a starving artist. How could he make ends meet? Well I guess you could say I was going to find out soon enough.
When he finally got me to agree to go out on a date with him, he told me a few things I didn’t know what to make of.
“Here is my address,” he stated pushing a piece of paper into my hand. “Be there at five, Papi. I want to show you my art.” His eyes were wide and he kept licking his lips. I felt like I had just handed him the sweetest dessert in a pastry shop. It was sort of scary.
I got to the address on time. I wasn’t sure what to wear cause Perez hadn’t said what we were going to be doing all on our date. I knocked but the door was open.
“Hey Perez, I’m here.”
I wasn’t sure what was going on but I walked in. There were pictures on the wall of some woman in sexy poses. I thought it was odd for a gay man, but then again what did I know. I mean I had pictures horses so who was I to judge?
There were some incredible pieces of statuary in his living room made out of metal. I was impressed as hell. The one had his name scorched into the metal. The man had talent I had to say that for him. I walked over to the couch and sat down. I could hear water turning off, and figured he might have been running a little late. I didn’t want to cause him problems so I sat down. He had two glasses sitting on his coffee table and a bottle of wine chilling. I couldn’t help but smile.
“Oh, you’re here already.”
I turned and had to do a double take. There stood this short little woman, with long dark hair. She wore a dress that looked like it had been painted on her body. I wondered for a moment if I had wandered into the wrong apartment.
She seemed to float toward me. Her dress clung to every curve and there was a scent of Irish Spring in the air, but no perfume. Her dark brown eyes were lined and really seemed to stand out. Her lips were a soft red. I couldn’t do more than stare open mouthed as she bent over before me, showcasing her plump round derriere. Then she lifted the wine bottle, winked at me, and proceeded to pour it into the waiting wine glasses.
“Um, I ... ah, am waiting for Pez … I mean Perez. Is he,” I squeaked, “um here?”
She laughed low and throaty. If I had been into women I’m sure I would have creamed myself, but instead I was feeling a wave of panic and kept looking for the guy I was supposed to be having a date with.
“Papi,” she said seductively, “I’ve been here the whole time.”
Holy Shit! Perez was a Drag Artist. Sure as hell didn’t expect that!
So this was the original prompt - This wasn’t what you expected when you finally agreed to go out. You figured maybe a movie and dinner but that isn’t you got. Who could have expected this on a date? So what did happen?
So what do you think of the date? Did do what the prompt asked? Where you surprised? Comments are welcomed and if you enjoyed it feel free to click like.