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    Mark Arbour
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Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

Flux - 43. Chapter 43

This one is out a day early. :boy:

August 6, 2002

Claremont, OH

 

Will

 

I’d been glancing between Zach and his Jesus pamphlet, but I stopped and just zeroed in on him. If I were to visualize something twisted for Zach to do, it sure as fuck wasn’t religious proselytizing. It shook me to my core because it was so unexpected, and that made me question whether I knew him at all. Was everything we’d been just a sham? Did he even love me?

I was learning, though, that it was a smart idea to keep my cool. Grand did that, maintained his composure, and that way when he finally reacted, he did it with all the facts. And in some stunning coincidence, I managed to do just that, to force my outrage inside, and as I did, and as I mellowed, instead of glaring at Zach and throwing rage at him, I read his expression. And just as I’d let my rage go, he’d let go of his shock and horror. Now we were locked on and communicating non-verbally. He was telling me, pleading with me, not to lose it, and to listen to his explanation. I gave him a weak smile to tell him I understood.

He was with two other people, both of them older, so I didn’t know if he could talk to me or not. I walked in their direction, angling toward him, but staying out of their earshot.

“This will change your life,” he said to me, handing me a pamphlet.

“Thanks,” I said loudly, then dropped my voice to barely a whisper. “I’m at the condo.”

“Jesus loves you,” he said, but winked at me, then I turned around and walked away. I went back to the condo, and thumbed through the pamphlet. It wasn’t full of vitriol; rather it was a standard appeal to people to see the true word of God. To distract myself, I forced myself to analyze it, and that actually made me laugh. The whole thing was designed to convince someone of limited intelligence. They’d taken a brochure that may work at a tractor pull and were using it to try to convince educated white-collar workers. Idiots.

My instincts were to reach out to someone, to help me get some clarity, but I was so embarrassed that I didn’t want to tell anyone. I wasn’t embarrassed because Zach found Jesus; if he did, and that made him happy, that was fine. I was embarrassed because of what my initial reaction had been, and how that would look when my family found out. It would make me look like a terrible judge of character. I’d argued for Zach, defended him against Gathan, JJ, John, and the rest of them, claiming that I knew the person that he was. But did I?

I had worked myself into a really deep funk, and it was getting worse, when I heard a knock on the door. I got up and answered it to find Zach still in his church clothes. I gave him a dour look, and held the door open to let him in. “Did I miss the big revival?” I asked snidely.

He put his hand on my arm. “Please, just hear me out.” Even though I was pissed off at him, something clicked, telling me that I at least needed to hear his reasoning. And I remembered that I’d promised that no matter what, I’d always be his friend.

I led him into the main area, a huge open space that contained the kitchen, living room, and dining room. I sat in a chair, my way of keeping distance between us. He sat on the couch, but had slid over as close to the chair as he could. “Talk.”

“You came out early,” he said. I couldn’t believe he was wasting my limited patience talking about my travel itinerary.

“I’ve got about five minutes of patience to hear what the fuck you’re doing,” I snarled. “If you want to talk about the fucking weather, go right ahead.”

He looked at me and blinked, causing tears to fall out of his beautiful violet eyes. “Will, this is the only way I can stay in the closet.”

It wasn’t his statement that impacted me; it was those tears, and the desperation in his voice. My mind flashed back to my post 9-11 nightmare, about how fucked up I’d been, and I remembered how he’d been my rock, and he’d stood behind me, propping me up. I’d been flagellating him in my mind for all this shit I thought he’d done, but here in front of me was the guy I loved, and he was really upset. I got up and moved over to sit next to him, and put my arm around him. “What does that mean?”

“Do you remember our meeting with Barry?”

“In Malibu?”

“Yeah. He said there were three ways I could hide our relationship. One was to get a girlfriend, another was to fuck a bunch of women, and the third one was to become a religious freak.”

“So you decided to become a religious freak?”

“I can’t do the first two,” he said, and another tear fell out of his eye.

“What happened?” I asked.

He looked at me, completely relieved. “You don’t hate me?”

“Not yet,” I said, smiling at him. “Tell me what happened.”

“I went out with Brent and his girlfriend, and this chick they fixed me up with,” he said. I tried not to let him see me get jealous. “She was nice, and really hot. And she was totally into me. We ended up back at Brent’s girlfriend’s apartment, and they went off to fuck, leaving us to watch television or whatever.”

“Or whatever?”

“You want to hear all of this?” he asked, his tone telling me that if I agreed, I couldn’t be all judgmental.

“I want to hear all of this.”

He nodded. “It was pretty obvious we were supposed to fuck. She sat next to me, she was really pretty, and I hadn’t fucked anyone since I’d been with you. So I went for it. We started making out, and she ended up sucking my dick. She wasn’t even close to being as good at that as you are.”

I chuckled at that. “That’s me. Will the extraordinary cocksucker.” He laughed, not because it was funny, but because I wasn’t busting his balls.

“I kept thinking that if I could just cum, it would end the whole thing, but I couldn’t. Not even when I thought of you.”

“Right,” I said skeptically, even though he was probably telling the truth.

“She basically took off her clothes and sat in my lap.”

“Did you use a condom?”

“Yeah, and that’s the problem, because I can’t fuck women with condoms on. But I didn’t want to not be safe, because...you know.” He blushed, grinned shyly, and looked down. God, he was adorable.

“Because cum is your favorite food?”

“Maybe,” he said, and then got back to his story. “So I put it on, started fucking her, and then lost it.”

“Lost what?”

“I got soft.” I could see the agony in his eyes, and then he looked away, ashamed and embarrassed. That must have been awful for him, to go limp mid-fuck. He’d be wondering what kind of 17-year-old dude went limp during sex. The answer would be a gay one.

“No way I’m believing that,” I said. “You weren’t an Ironman for nothing.” He’d played football for Don Bosco High, and their mascot was the Ironman.

“When I’m around you, I’m usually hard,” he said in his sexy voice, and then got nervous. It was really upsetting to see him this stressed out.

“Zach,” I said, making him look at me. “It’s going to be OK. I still love you.”

He all but lunged forward and grabbed me, pulling me into a big hug, and I could feel how tortured he was. I hugged him back just as strongly, and rubbed his back as I did, until he calmed down and started talking again. “I can’t do it, Will. I can’t do it.”

“So you decided that the only way you’d be able to stay in the closet and still play football was to be a religious freak?” He nodded, and I felt myself getting pissed again, but not at him. Fuck the NFL and their bigoted attitudes that tortured talented young gay guys like Zach. And fuck the NCAA too. They were no better.

“That’s my only way,” he said. “Trent has gotten all involved in this church. They’re a non-denominational Christian church. They’re nice people, but not real smart.”

“Kind of like your parents,” I joked.

“Right,” he said dubiously, even though we both knew it was true. “He asked me to go to a meeting with him, and it seemed like a good opportunity.”

“When did this happen?”

“A couple of days after I got here,” he said.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I demanded. “That’s the only thing I’m upset with you about.”

“Because I wanted to talk to you about this face to face. Because I was pretty embarrassed about it,” he said.

“Dude, if you want to find Jesus and you feel good about that, it’s nothing to be embarrassed about.”

“I’m embarrassed because I can’t keep it up long enough to fuck a hot chick, I can’t fake being a straight dude; so instead I have to fake being all religious.”

“Baby, this is the price to make it big playing football,” I said.

“I’ve thought about quitting so many times,” he said. “You probably think I’m a fucking idiot. It’s hard to describe the rush I get from playing, from breaking through that line, from breaking that tackle, from outthinking the other dude.”

“I think you just described it really well,” I said. “Some guys play sports for the money. They don’t enjoy it, they just want to win and cash in. That was the culture I didn’t want to deal with, and that’s why I didn’t try to go pro with surfing.”

“It’s more than just the money,” he said.

“If it were just the money, I’d be really pissed off at you, because I have plenty of that.”

“Dude, I am not going to sponge off of you,” he said.

“You wouldn’t be sponging,” I said, and leaned forward so I was whispering in his ear. “I’d make you earn every fucking dollar.”

“Then I’d be a whore,” he grumbled.

“Better than handing out Jesus pamphlets in the Mills,” I teased. “You are so fucking smart, there’s almost nothing you can’t do. You won’t be my bitch no matter what you do.”

He gave me a really nice kiss. “Thanks for propping me up.”

“I’ll get you up anytime,” I said, making him chuckle. “So why did you decide to convert while you were here?”

“Because when I go back to Concord, I can talk about my church back here, and maybe I won’t have to go so much when I’m out there.”

“That’s pretty fucking clever,” I said. “Can you spend the night?”

“No one knows you’re in town?” he asked.

“Only the staff at the pub I ate at,” I said.

He pulled out his phone, called his parents, and told them he was spending the night with some dude I’d never heard of. He hung up and grinned. “I’m all yours.”

“You’re like a present,” I said, smiling. “First thing I’m doing is unwrapping you.”

 

August 7, 2002

Escorial

 

Matt

 

I was walking toward my room when Alex’s door opened. He peeked out and smiled at me. “I need your help with something.”

“Sure,” I said, walking into his room, while he closed the door behind me.

He was wearing just his boxers, and he slid them down, and then pushed me onto my knees. “Suck me.”

“Fuck yeah,” I said, licking my lips. His cock throbbed when I said that, and I inhaled it to keep from giggling. I got him pretty worked up and then stood up. He looked at me, wondering what I was doing, when I pushed him backward. It was funny to see him get a little pissed off, since he was used to being in charge, but he really couldn’t do much about it. He was no match for me physically. I kept pushing him back toward the bed.

“What are you doing?” he finally demanded, not a little annoyed.

“I’m gonna make you feel so good,” I cooed, and leaned in to give him an aggressive kiss. I pushed him back onto the bed and fell almost on top of him. “Just relax, let me take care of you.”

He smiled and put his hand on my head, guiding me back down to his dick. I sucked on it for a bit longer, then pulled off of him, knelt up, and in one fluid motion, I grabbed his legs, and flipped him onto his stomach. He tried to turn over, but I was on top of him, with my face staring at his beautiful little ass. He struggled, trying to turn back around, and I heard him bitch about it, but I ignored him, even as I squeezed his soft cheeks. “What are you doing?” he demanded, all pissed off.

“I’m gonna kiss your ass,” I said, and before he could complain, I spread his cheeks and ran my tongue up his crack, flicking his hole with the tip. I’d tried to play with his ass before, and he’d always stopped me, but knowing how he had some pretty weird hang-ups, I decided to push the envelope. He resisted, keeping his pucker tightly closed, but I didn’t let that stop me. I worked it with my tongue. “You taste so good. God, you taste good,” I murmured, then almost growled as I dove back in again, letting him hear the vibration from my words resonate into his hole.

And with those words, something clicked, and he was with me. “Oh yes,” he said. “Oh yes. God, that’s good.” I worked him and worked him, getting him really relaxed, and then I gently pushed my index finger in. He clenched his ass closed, as if to keep me out, but I was already far enough in to finger him enough to get him to relax.

“Hand me the lube,” I ordered. I was surprised that he did what I said. I poured some on his ass, and now my finger could really work him. I fucked him with one finger, then two, and when the second finger went in and started brushing against his prostate, he damn near lost his mind.

I was really focused on him, so focused I was surprised to see him handing me a condom. “Do it,” he said. I gently pulled my fingers out, smiling as he sighed sadly that they were gone, then took off my pants, slipped the condom on, and lubed up my cock. I didn’t just drive into him, I went back with my fingers, spending a minute getting him fired up again, and then I pulled them out, lined up my dick, and gently pushed in.

I watched his face, and when he cringed, I’d pull back. “You have the sweetest ass,” I said.

“Hurts a bit,” he said, but he was being stoic, and handling it well.

“You’re such a man,” I said, as I sank the last inch of my dick into him, and draped my body over him so I could kiss his neck. “You handle it so well. And your reward for being so brave is that now I’m going to make you feel fucking amazing.”

I gently started to piston in and out of him, and he wasn’t enjoying it, but that didn’t surprise me. I’d gotten a shitload of boy cherries; I knew what I was doing. I put my hands under him and wrapped them back up around his shoulders to give me leverage, and let my body read his. I almost went into a trance, like I was merging myself with him, even as I adjusted my angle and my speed, waiting for him to click with me. “I’m not sure about this,” he said.

“I am,” I told him confidently, then adjusted myself up just a bit more, and that did it. It was almost funny how I could feel his body relax, and feel him move back into me. Now he was with me, and now I picked up my pace, fucking him with long, smooth strokes. “You want me to stop?”

“Not a chance,” he said, smiling at me. “God, that’s good.” I fucked him for a while, but I was getting pretty close, and he hadn’t blown yet, so I pulled out and made him turn over. He did, and pulled his ankles back, all but begging me to enter him again. I did, and this time I got to see his expression of ecstasy as I plunged in and out of him. I reached down and stroked his cock, getting it back to its full hardness in no time, and then he came.

I let my own body go, and followed him into the orgasm, stroking his cock as I blasted my own load into the condom. When we were done, I pulled out gently, pausing to reach down and gently rub his hole so my withdrawal didn’t hurt, then pulled the condom off. He lay there, looking a little freaked out, but I had expected that. I leaned over him and took his dick in my mouth and sucked the remaining cum out of it, then licked his load off his abs and his chest, making sure I looked at him the entire time. “You taste really good.”

But like all of our encounters, once it was over, he wanted me to leave. I was fine with that. I slipped on my shorts, gave him a gentle kiss, and then walked back to my room. I went in and took a shower, slipped on some fresh boxers, then collapsed back onto my bed, totally spent.

I was fucking exhausted. I’d never had a problem where I’d had so much sex that I was worn out, but I had that problem now. I honestly didn’t know if Alex and Wade were fucking each other, but they sure as hell were fucking me. I lay in my room, my arms behind my head, staring up at the ceiling, pondering how incredibly weird this situation was. I was really enjoying Wade, and I was really enjoying Alex. Things had been really good, with one exception. Alex had this way of making me seem kind of like, well, a whore, which I guess went along with his hang-up. After Wade had figured that out, it actually made it easier to be with Alex, because I knew what he needed, and it was fun to give it to him. He was just so fucking sexy, and so attractive, he’d just sucked me in.

Being with Alex had actually helped me understand what had happened to Wade in England. There was something about him that just made him irresistible. I wondered if that worked better with Americans, because we would appreciate his unique accent and manners more. Alex had gone through the various paintings in the Great Hall and talked about them, commenting on their various attributes and styles, and left all of us, even JP, impressed. He knew all about the suits of armor, and pointed out stuff on the old walls Ben had refinished that none of us knew. I found myself lusting after him whenever I was around him, because the attraction was just that strong. Those feelings I felt would have been even more pronounced in Wade, because the qualities that Alex exhibited were either qualities that Wade had himself that he appreciated, or qualities that Wade wished he had. I could understand what happened to Wade in England. I didn’t think I’d ever be quite that into Alex that I’d lose it like that, but I got close enough to figure out why Wade did.

Wade had spent the night with Alex last night, and that had bothered me, but not as much as it could have. I guess I knew that the intimacy they shared was probably not that much more advanced than what friends would share, since sex was so bland. Wade had told me this morning that it had been no better. I grinned when I thought about what a little wild man Alex was with me. And if he was crazed, Wade was even worse.

And all of that was wonderful except for one thing. When the three of us were together, Alex was really possessive with Wade. He’d give off these really strong signs that Wade was his, and made it seem like when Wade was with me, he was letting me borrow Wade. They’d been planning to go for a drive yesterday, and Alex had told me that they were going; emphasizing that it was just the two of them, and making me feel like an appendage. I’d rationalized that, getting that if I was the whore, he’d probably treat me like that, and he did. For things like spending time in public, he’d squire Wade around. For a good fuck, he’d find me.

That would have probably worked if he and I were in a relationship with anyone else but Wade. It was what I’d told Wade before; he made me feel like I was an interloper in their relationship, and his manner implied that I was lucky that he deigned to let me even have a piece of Wade. I felt my temper rising at that, just like it had since Alex had gotten here and first done it. Only this time, it was much stronger, and my eyes shot open when I finally realized that my brain was trying to tell me something. It was sending me some pretty strong warning signs that while things were good right now, and while everyone was currently happy, if I had to deal with this much longer, I’d probably lose it.

I sighed, and with the stress of the situation, and my sexual exhaustion, I drifted off to sleep, and didn’t wake up again until after lunchtime. I looked at the clock and grimaced. I’d crashed for three hours. I got up and got dressed, then went up to eat. No one was in the kitchen except Carmen. She gave me some fruit to snack on even as she fried up a couple of cheeseburgers for me.

I was just finishing up my last cheeseburger when Wade and Alex came strolling into the kitchen, both of them looking flushed. “Good afternoon,” Wade said cheerfully. “We went for a ride.”

“It was splendid,” Alex said.

“I’m glad you enjoyed it,” I said. “It’s a great way to see the area.”

“Did you need to get ready?” Alex asked Wade.

“Give me an hour,” he said. His morning routine normally took 37 minutes, so I wondered what he was going to do with the other 23 minutes.

“We are going to go see the campus and surrounding environs,” Alex said, pointedly excluding me. I felt the anger boiling up inside me, but I controlled it. Only this time it was more pronounced than it had been in the morning. I was losing my ability to deal with him pretty fucking fast.

“That sounds like a blast,” I said enthusiastically. I stood up and got ready to leave, knowing that I had to get the fuck out of the kitchen, and I had to get the fuck away from Alex and Escorial. “I got a call a bit ago, and I have to go to Chicago.”

Wade looked at me, wondering what reason would possibly require me to rush back to Chicago, and then I saw him get a little jealous, because he probably assumed I was planning to be with Cam. “That’s really a shame,” Alex said sincerely. “I have so enjoyed your company.”

“And I have really enjoyed yours,” I said, winking at him. He looked irritated. I guess his whore wasn’t supposed to make suggestive remarks in front of his princess. “I’ll come visit you guys in Boston.” If I did, I thought, it would be a really short visit.

“I will miss you,” Wade said to me, and even a moron would have been able to hear the love in his words, and Alex was no moron. He looked even more annoyed, and I got that not only had Wade said the words to me in a loving way, he’d said ‘I’, not ‘we’. Alex would have expected his princess to say ‘we’.

“How about if we get ready, and meet in the Foyer in an hour and a half,” Wade suggested. He’d tacked on some time to talk to me.

“I will see you there,” Alex said pleasantly, and headed back to his room. We both watched him leave, waiting for him to make it at least partly back to his room.

“Keep me company,” Wade said to me. I followed him back to his room, which was basically our room.

“Did you have a nice ride?” I asked.

“We did.”

“Did you ride side-saddle?” I teased.

“I feel like I’m some chick you two alpha males are fighting over,” he groused.

“That’s because you have an amazing pussy,” I said, grabbing his ass.

He turned and put his hands on my shoulders, then wrapped them around my neck, pulling me in for a nice kiss. “Want to take a shower with me?”

“I’m already clean,” I said.

“Then get dirty with me,” he said suggestively. And as drained as I was, for Wade, I was fully recharged. This time, he fucked me, and it was really brief, really intense, and really good.

I finished getting ready, and then looked at the clock on the wall, as I watched him go through his routine. “You still have seventeen minutes until you’re done.” It was just another sign of how well I knew him.

“Why are you going to Chicago?” he asked. I had a feeling that he already knew.

“I’m running away,” I admitted. “I’m not good at this.”

“Not good at what?”

“I’m not good at sharing you,” I said. He gave me an unpleasant look. “I said that wrong. I’m not good at competing for your attention. I get too jealous. When we’re together, I need us to be together.”

“How is that going to work when you come to Boston?”

“I don’t know,” I said, then got a little frustrated. “Come on Wade, you see how he is around you. All of his physical gestures, everything that he does is designed to tell me and everyone else that you’re his. He never talks about himself; he talks about the two of you as a couple.”

“At least he wants to fuck you,” he grumbled.

“And a couple of hours ago, I fucked him,” I said. His eyes shot open.

“What?”

“I fucked him. He shot off like a fucking Roman candle.”

“He won’t even let me touch his ass.”

“You’re too pure and clean to mess with that part of the body,” I said, teasing him.

“Whatever,” he said grumpily.

“Look, he’s our guest, and I’ve done everything I can to show him a good time. And I do mean everything.” He rolled his eyes, and I chuckled at him.

“Then why are you leaving?”

“Because I can feel the anger building,” I said. “If I stay here, I’ll ultimately loose it, and say shit to him I don’t want to say. It will upset you, JP, and the rest of the family. And I’ll be upset with myself.”

“Matt the volcano,” he said, and turned away from the mirror to smile at me, and wrap his arms around me. “You can figure out when you’re going to blow before you do. That’s progress.”

“Dude, I always know when I’m about to blow,” I joked.

“I’m sorry this has been hard on you,” he said.

“It’s hard on you too,” I pointed out.

“No shit,” Wade said. “I went from being totally into Alex, to finding out that he was awesome as long as I didn’t want to have a meaningful orgasm, to figuring out that he’s only sexless around me because I’m a fucking China doll.”

“You know, being with him like this, I can understand why you did what you did in England,” I said.

“You can?”

I nodded. “He’s really attractive, and despite the fact that he’s seriously pissing me off right now, he’s an interesting guy. But his qualities are way more important to you than to me.”

“I’m not so sure about that,” Wade said. “You’re the whore.”

I laughed at that. “Baby, nothing I did with him comes close to what I have with you.”

“I’m sorry that you’re on this roller coaster ride.”

“You’re riding the roller coaster too,” I said, to validate him.

“But it’s my fault. So before I take you on any more big drops, let me get my shit together,” he said, almost pleading.

“Good luck with that,” I said, teasing him. He pretended to be annoyed, and then smiled. He pulled me into another kiss, and molded his body to mine, not in an erotic way, but in an intimate way.

“I learned a lot about myself over these past couple of weeks,” he said.

“What did you learn?”

“Let me put it all together, and I’ll come and explain it to you. And I promise I’ll come alone.”

“Something to look forward to.” I gave him a really nice kiss, and walked him up to the foyer. We had our arms around each other, and when Alex saw us, he had a brief flash of annoyance before his cool demeanor reasserted itself. It was exactly how Wade would have reacted. “Enjoy Stanford,” I said to them. We said goodbye, and then I watched them leave. When they walked out the door, Alex had his arm around Wade, but Wade didn’t have his arm around Alex.

I went into the kitchen to grab a snack to take back to my room, and found JP and Stef there, nibbling on some fruit.

“Good afternoon,” Stef said. “What are you doing today?”

“I need to get back to Chicago,” I said. “When are you planning to fly out?”

He looked at me, surprised that I was leaving. “It is a shame that you have to go so soon.”

“I think it is better for me to not be here, than to be here and cause problems,” I said, then waited for him to answer my question.

“I was planning to leave on the 10th,” he said. “I thought Will may want to join me.”

“Zach will be in Concord by then,” I said knowingly. “He’ll probably need a distraction.”

“That was on my mind,” Stef said.

“I’ve got to make some reservations,” I said. “I’ll come see you before I leave.”

“Do that,” JP said, smiling at me.

Armed with a plan, I went to my room and started to pack when Brad came in. “I hear you’re leaving.”

I nodded. “I have to get out of here. I’m going to kill him if I don’t.”

“Wade or Alex?”

“Alex,” I said.

“You were doing so well last night,” he said.

I sighed, then sat down in a chair, and motioned him to do the same. “Alex has this deal where he has Wade up on a pedestal as some pure and chaste dude, and he will barely have sex with him, and when he does, it’s awful.”

“Then why are you leaving?” The implication was that Wade wouldn’t be happy with that.

“Then he has to have a slut on the side. Someone who will get all wild with him. That’s me.”

“I’ll bet you’re good at that,” he said with a grin.

“I’d probably be able to deal with it, but when we’re not in bed; Alex is really condescending to me, and very possessive of Wade.”

Brad eyed me, considering my words, and nodded. He’d be losing it too, so he understood my situation. “Where are you going?”

“Chicago,” I said. I had no idea why I picked that place, but it seemed to be the best option.

“Pack up your stuff. I’ll have my plane take you,” he said, pulling out his phone.

“Dude, you do not have to do that,” I insisted. I didn’t want him to use his private plane to facilitate my escape.

“You’re my son,” he said. “It’s a shitty job, but the perks are nice. This is one of them.”

I chuckled. “Thanks.”

“Did you tell Stef and JP why you’re leaving?”

“Not really,” I said. “You can explain it to them if you want.”

I went through my stuff, taking what I needed and leaving the rest. I’d be back here. This was my home. I ended up with a small suitcase and my backpack. I opened my jewelry box to take out my watch, and saw the rings there that Wade and I had exchanged. I picked his up and looked at it, pondering how badly I’d fucked up the most important relationship in my life. I’d given him this ring on New Year’s Day, 2001, and we’d promised to be partners forever.

I put my backpack down, walked over to my desk, and wrote a quick note:

Wade,

I won’t truly be happy until this ring is on your finger again.

Love,

Matt.

I put it in an envelope with the ring, wrote his name on it, and left it on the bed. Then I left.

Copyright © 2014 Mark Arbour; All Rights Reserved.
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Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
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Where do I begin? I want to comment but am speechless!

Zach and Will...can this end well? I don't think so. Zach might have to stay in the closet for the next 10 yrs or so. I feel sorry for Zach because he's so torn between his love for football and his love for Will.

I feel hope for Matt as the gilt on the royal crown is beginning to tarnish. I like the way Matt handled it. A quiet strength. Hopefully through the note, Matt, the handsome Prince will awake sleeping beauty from his sleep.

Awesome chapter as always. Can't wait to see how the book ends.

Jinty

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Interesting turn of events, Mark. Will and Matt both have done some maturing, but seeing how their romantic lives are going, I'm wondering if the effort they are putting in is worth the reward. Zach has yet to show any real backbone, and Wade is too 'flighty', though he has the most potential that I can see so far. Zach's problems are all his own choosing--with his 'supposed' brain, he should be able to get a degree which will earn him money, and yet play amateur football to his heart's content--it is still the same thrill, just not the glamour, which isn't his reason for doing it, or so he says.

Brad needs to get Barry on that plane to Afghanistan pretty quick!

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Zach actually sounds like this may be a well thought out plan, but I can see a few problems with it down the road. I was really impressed with how Will handled himself during this situation.

 

Loved the scenes with Matt and Alex and Matt and Wade but no so much when they are all together, I am glad that Matt understands his limits and has decided to remove himself before his patience is gone. I do worry that with where Matt left the letter that Wade will not be the one that gets it...

 

Can't wait for the next one.

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I don't know for whom to feel more sorry, Matt or Zach. No, I take that back...it's definitely Zach. As sad and angry as Matt is feeling right now, his happy ending is in sight (for the reader, at any rate). Whereas Zach has just traded living one lie for another (albeit a somewhat more palatable one, at least to him), with years of the same to look forward to. :no:The distinct voices of your narrators came through really strongly in this chapter, as did their emotional turmoil.

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Ok...I concede...maybe Wade isn't such a dick. I think Matt has handled this whole situation very well and leaving might just be the best thing for all concerned.

 

Will and Zach...interesting...will it last? Remains to be seen.

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I was so proud of Will and how he reacted during his whole exchanged with Zack. All that will needed was a little bit more time as seasoning. The big question now is what will Zach do, and for how long?

 

The whole Wade, Matt, and Alex thing will work its way through to a resolution by itself. I can't see Wade not being able to recognize the truth of what Matt told him and we already know that he is unhappy with his physical relationship with Alex. The clock is ticking… True it may take a semester or quarter, whatever system the college is on before the formal end of Wade and Alex. I think Wade has too much class to simply chop off Alex at the knees and toss him out of the Boston house. The question is this – will Alex and his oh so good British manners, allow him to realize that there is not going to be a long-term relationship and leave before Wade makes it clear through his behavior that there is no future for them in the current behavior mode? I do not see Alex changing the way he is – that would be way beneath him - in his own mind…

 

It was truly good of Brad to have that discussion with Matt and tell him that he's going to fly him to Chicago as that was one of the perks of the being his son...

 

Thank you Mark and team Arbour!

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On 07/30/2014 09:29 AM, damejintymcginty said:
Where do I begin? I want to comment but am speechless!

Zach and Will...can this end well? I don't think so. Zach might have to stay in the closet for the next 10 yrs or so. I feel sorry for Zach because he's so torn between his love for football and his love for Will.

I feel hope for Matt as the gilt on the royal crown is beginning to tarnish. I like the way Matt handled it. A quiet strength. Hopefully through the note, Matt, the handsome Prince will awake sleeping beauty from his sleep.

Awesome chapter as always. Can't wait to see how the book ends.

Jinty

Thanks Jinty. I like your observation about Matt: A quiet strength. Both he and Will showed some amazing maturity (for them) and strength in this chapter. Our little boys are growing up!
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On 07/30/2014 09:34 AM, ColumbusGuy said:
Interesting turn of events, Mark. Will and Matt both have done some maturing, but seeing how their romantic lives are going, I'm wondering if the effort they are putting in is worth the reward. Zach has yet to show any real backbone, and Wade is too 'flighty', though he has the most potential that I can see so far. Zach's problems are all his own choosing--with his 'supposed' brain, he should be able to get a degree which will earn him money, and yet play amateur football to his heart's content--it is still the same thrill, just not the glamour, which isn't his reason for doing it, or so he says.

Brad needs to get Barry on that plane to Afghanistan pretty quick!

With Will, it's not really an investment in Zach, it's payback for how awesome he was after 9-11. As far as Zach and football, I think you're missing the point. If you're that good, playing in a rec league would suck. It's like telling Dali or Monet they can only use crayons, or telling a concert violinist he'll have to make due with a ukelele. Zach's not in this game for the money, and he's not in it for the short term fame. He's in it because he knows he can kick some serious ass on the field, and probably break some records.
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On 07/30/2014 11:06 AM, centexhairysub said:
Zach actually sounds like this may be a well thought out plan, but I can see a few problems with it down the road. I was really impressed with how Will handled himself during this situation.

 

Loved the scenes with Matt and Alex and Matt and Wade but no so much when they are all together, I am glad that Matt understands his limits and has decided to remove himself before his patience is gone. I do worry that with where Matt left the letter that Wade will not be the one that gets it...

 

Can't wait for the next one.

I think Zach planned this out pretty well. I'll bet people think of him as a somewhat dumb football player, and that's a mistake. He probably sits there in team meetings, laughing his ass off at how stupid the other guys are. If he has an Achilles Heel, it's his over confidence.

 

I thought it was cool the way Matt read his emotions and took action before the explosion. I don't think the letter is in any real danger, since Matt left it on the bed in their room. Escorial is pretty secure, and these guys would have to have confidence that they had a degree of privacy. Unless they're having sex. :-)

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On 07/30/2014 11:26 AM, impunity said:
I don't know for whom to feel more sorry, Matt or Zach. No, I take that back...it's definitely Zach. As sad and angry as Matt is feeling right now, his happy ending is in sight (for the reader, at any rate). Whereas Zach has just traded living one lie for another (albeit a somewhat more palatable one, at least to him), with years of the same to look forward to. :no:The distinct voices of your narrators came through really strongly in this chapter, as did their emotional turmoil.
Thanks for the review. I'm glad the characters were alive on the page...that's my goal. I agree with you about Zach; he's going to have some major choices to make, some major trade-offs, and what would be particularly grueling is that he'll probably have to make them continuously. At each step of his career, he can opt out, or opt back in.
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On 07/30/2014 11:26 AM, Gene63 said:
Ok...I concede...maybe Wade isn't such a dick. I think Matt has handled this whole situation very well and leaving might just be the best thing for all concerned.

 

Will and Zach...interesting...will it last? Remains to be seen.

LOL. I think Wade is an honorable guy with some dickish moments.

 

I think to answer the Will and Zach question, you would first have to define the term "last". Even then, I don't have the answer.

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On 07/30/2014 12:02 PM, KevinD said:
I was so proud of Will and how he reacted during his whole exchanged with Zack. All that will needed was a little bit more time as seasoning. The big question now is what will Zach do, and for how long?

 

The whole Wade, Matt, and Alex thing will work its way through to a resolution by itself. I can't see Wade not being able to recognize the truth of what Matt told him and we already know that he is unhappy with his physical relationship with Alex. The clock is ticking… True it may take a semester or quarter, whatever system the college is on before the formal end of Wade and Alex. I think Wade has too much class to simply chop off Alex at the knees and toss him out of the Boston house. The question is this – will Alex and his oh so good British manners, allow him to realize that there is not going to be a long-term relationship and leave before Wade makes it clear through his behavior that there is no future for them in the current behavior mode? I do not see Alex changing the way he is – that would be way beneath him - in his own mind…

 

It was truly good of Brad to have that discussion with Matt and tell him that he's going to fly him to Chicago as that was one of the perks of the being his son...

 

Thank you Mark and team Arbour!

Thanks for the review!

 

I think there are a number of ways the situation with Wade, Alex, and Matt can work itself out. Wade may be willing to work with Alex on the physical aspect of their relationship, if that's possible. Matt could move to Boston and blow everything up. Or they could all part as enemies. But I think that in the end, Wade and Alex are both classy enough to handle this without a lot of bad feelings, no matter what happens.

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Once again, the chapter is great.

Will and Zach are both young and will both be okay no matter what.

With Matt and Wade, I am getting frustrated with how Matt is treated. I saw a review that you commented on that Alex and Wade are classy enough to handle anything. Don't agree and hate to see Matt being the one who is going to create discord.

I believe that Matt and Wade are more Stef and JP, but see a Brad, Robbie and Neil story line. I guess I have an affinity to Matt as I share his name. He has been there for Wade for so much and I don't think that Alex would be there for Wade as Matt has been.

Alex will not take the Tiffany baby well no matter who is the father.

I hope that Wade gets the letter, but wouldn't put it past Alex to get it and hide it.

I dot't really dislike Alex as I did before, but his holier than thou doesn't sit well. I still think he is after a free room and board.

Again, love the chapter.

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:blink: The CAP world as we know it ends: Will and Matt actually use their brains to control their emotions and act sensibly:

Will the Volcano controls himself and doesn't erupt but has a rational conversation with Zach.

Matt the Volcano recognizes he's going to erupt and goes away to do it in private or simmer down. He manages to talk to Wade and Brad and get them on his side.

:huh: I'm so stunned I don't know what to say.

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Phew! While I hate that Zach has to hide, at least I can see his point of view and bravo to Will for holding it together and showing a beautiful amount of maturity. Speaking of maturity, Matt pulling himself out of a volatile situation to avoid the blow up that will come if he stays? It's like a baby taking his first steps I'm so proud. Great work, thanks.

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On 07/30/2014 12:52 PM, Mardi614 said:
Once again, the chapter is great.

Will and Zach are both young and will both be okay no matter what.

With Matt and Wade, I am getting frustrated with how Matt is treated. I saw a review that you commented on that Alex and Wade are classy enough to handle anything. Don't agree and hate to see Matt being the one who is going to create discord.

I believe that Matt and Wade are more Stef and JP, but see a Brad, Robbie and Neil story line. I guess I have an affinity to Matt as I share his name. He has been there for Wade for so much and I don't think that Alex would be there for Wade as Matt has been.

Alex will not take the Tiffany baby well no matter who is the father.

I hope that Wade gets the letter, but wouldn't put it past Alex to get it and hide it.

I dot't really dislike Alex as I did before, but his holier than thou doesn't sit well. I still think he is after a free room and board.

Again, love the chapter.

Thanks for the review!

 

We're seeing a lot of personal growth in Matt, and he's not the college jock he once was. That guy let Wade down badly after 9-11, this guy seems to be more stalwart. I don't think Matt deserves a lot of sympathy, because he's the one who brought their relationship to an end, but he also gets props for trying to fix things. IMHO

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On 07/30/2014 02:28 PM, Timothy M. said:
:blink: The CAP world as we know it ends: Will and Matt actually use their brains to control their emotions and act sensibly:

Will the Volcano controls himself and doesn't erupt but has a rational conversation with Zach.

Matt the Volcano recognizes he's going to erupt and goes away to do it in private or simmer down. He manages to talk to Wade and Brad and get them on his side.

:huh: I'm so stunned I don't know what to say.

That's hilarious! And true.

 

Both of them were remarkably restrained. I wouldn't plan for that to be a normal state of affairs. :-)

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On 07/30/2014 02:31 PM, Miles Long said:
Phew! While I hate that Zach has to hide, at least I can see his point of view and bravo to Will for holding it together and showing a beautiful amount of maturity. Speaking of maturity, Matt pulling himself out of a volatile situation to avoid the blow up that will come if he stays? It's like a baby taking his first steps I'm so proud. Great work, thanks.
LOL Miles! Babies taking their first steps. I think that both Matt and Will did well, but for the best performance, I think the nod goes to Will. That had to be a really tough conversation for both of them, and the way he got his act together and helped out Zach was deserving of kudos, IMHO.
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Zach has obviously thought this through (definitely not a dumb jock) and while he has chosen a difficult path for himself it could be least unpleasant option. I would give him full marks (and am being very very picky here) but he should have warned Will. I fully understand the need to do it face to face and given that is so important to them both, that's what he should have done but a brief phone call or text to say he has made some choices and wants talk about it would have got him 100%. Minor minor quibble on what must have been a very difficult thing to work out on his own. Full marks to Will, I did like the reference to what Grand would do.

And full marks to Matt. It was time.

It was nice to hear Zach talk about his love of football rather than the career. He doesn't want to be a footballer, he wants to play the best football he can. There was real passion there.

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On 07/30/2014 03:09 PM, Bucket1 said:
Zach has obviously thought this through (definitely not a dumb jock) and while he has chosen a difficult path for himself it could be least unpleasant option. I would give him full marks (and am being very very picky here) but he should have warned Will. I fully understand the need to do it face to face and given that is so important to them both, that's what he should have done but a brief phone call or text to say he has made some choices and wants talk about it would have got him 100%. Minor minor quibble on what must have been a very difficult thing to work out on his own. Full marks to Will, I did like the reference to what Grand would do.

And full marks to Matt. It was time.

It was nice to hear Zach talk about his love of football rather than the career. He doesn't want to be a footballer, he wants to play the best football he can. There was real passion there.

I get what you're saying about Zach, and how he should have dropped a hint to Will. I'm wondering, though, how that would have gone. It was driving Will nuts not being in Claremont with Zach, so if Zach had said something that mysterious to Will, he probably wouldn't have taken it too well. I think the other thing to factor in here is Zach's embarrassment. It doesn't surprise Will that Zach can't stay hard for a woman, but it surprised Zach. That's a huge ego blow, especially for a guy who's immersed in the macho culture of football. So I see your point, but I'm still undecided if it would have been better for Zach to drop a cautionary hint on Will.
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Hi Mark,

 

Thanks for the next chapter of Flux.

 

You had hinted at the possibility of Will surprising us in response to my review of the previous chapter, but I can't help but feel it's you yourself as a writer that surprised us. Will hasn't shown this kind of maturity in this kind of situation before and I find it very incredible that he'd allow Zach to explain himself. Usually you include some kind of explanation for emotional growth of your characters, but I missed it here.

 

Loved the way Matt felt an eruption coming, but I'm not sure the note with the ring was the right thing to do.

 

Lots of loving cuddles.

Maarten

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On 07/30/2014 03:59 PM, shyboy85 said:
Hi Mark,

 

Thanks for the next chapter of Flux.

 

You had hinted at the possibility of Will surprising us in response to my review of the previous chapter, but I can't help but feel it's you yourself as a writer that surprised us. Will hasn't shown this kind of maturity in this kind of situation before and I find it very incredible that he'd allow Zach to explain himself. Usually you include some kind of explanation for emotional growth of your characters, but I missed it here.

 

Loved the way Matt felt an eruption coming, but I'm not sure the note with the ring was the right thing to do.

 

Lots of loving cuddles.

Maarten

Thanks for the review, Maarten.

 

I think that Matt took a pretty big gamble with the ring. He and Wade have been working it out so they weren't partners, and Matt has been playing along with that. By giving Wade the ring, he's laying his cards on the table. If Wade isn't ready to go there (as partners), Matt may just lose him.

 

I think that I did allude to the reason for Will's growth: it was JP's influence on him. He's modeling his relatives (besides his father) and learning from them.

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Why can't Princess of Danfield do something about their lousy sex issue? or perhaps in the next chapter, you are planning to take us, the readers, into the bedroom and witness their conversation about why Earl of Bridgemont give him a lousy sex?

 

 

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Hi Mark,

 

Thank you for another terrific chapter. As many of the other reviewers stated, I really enjoyed the way that Will and Zach handled their situation. It showed that Zach had a bit more brain power than I thought as he came up with his unique solution for his problems. Will is growing and I love to see that growth and maturity in your characters.

 

You know, you are excellent at developing your characters and growing and developing them. As someone with a technical background, I am very good at technical writing but the one time I thought that I would try and develop a fictional story, it was a disaster. I worked at it and worked at it and still, it read more like a technical "how-to" manual than a good story. That made me realize how difficult it is to write stories that capture readers the way that you do really made me appreciate people, like you, who are good at writing.

 

I still despise Alex and you really scared me with this reply to another reviewer:

 

"I think there are a number of ways the situation with Wade, Alex, and Matt can work itself out. Wade may be willing to work with Alex on the physical aspect of their relationship, if that's possible. Matt could move to Boston and blow everything up. Or they could all part as enemies. But I think that in the end, Wade and Alex are both classy enough to handle this without a lot of bad feelings, no matter what happens."

 

I so hope that you don't take the approach to have Wade and Alex work it out. I still hope that Wade and Matt are both classy enough to embrace the good part of their history together, forgive each other for the bad part of their history and move forward together. Many couples, like my wonderful partner and I, have had to do just that. When I read the part of the chapter about the note and ring, I thought that finally Wade is going to get it together and get back with Matt and I thought that I could wait with a feeling of hope for your next chapter. Then I read your reply to the review that I quoted above with warnings or hints about how you may resolve it and now it is with more with a feeling of trepidation that I await your next wonderful chapter.

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On 07/30/2014 08:14 PM, SupermanSavesYou said:
Why can't Princess of Danfield do something about their lousy sex issue? or perhaps in the next chapter, you are planning to take us, the readers, into the bedroom and witness their conversation about why Earl of Bridgemont give him a lousy sex?

 

Wade mentioned in his chapter (I think it was 38) that he tried to pick up the action, but Alex shot him down. Wade got more aggressive in bed, and that turned Alex off.

 

Now, in a perfect world, Wade would have had a conversation about it with Alex, but this isn't a perfect world, and I can't see either one of them willingly discussing their sexual problems.

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