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Did you catch Monday's blog featuring this month's Classic Author ad choice, Endings & Beginnings, selected by Valkyrie? If not, go check it out and get your copy of a small graphic that you can use for your personal signature if you want to share the love for Viv's story. We had a couple of reviews from fans on Monday's blog, but Valkyrie has her thoughts on Viv's story and also got to pick an excerpt to share. Read on to find out what she picked and why!
Valkyrie said: Viv's writing is clear, descriptive, and left me salivating for more. The story I picked, Endings and Beginnings, is the first in a five part series titled Underneath this Big Ol' Sky. I chose this excerpt because it's a good introduction to the series, and drew me in immediately when I first read it. Just a word of warning if you read all five stories... you will want more. Viv left room for the story to continue, and can only hope that one day she does.
The subtle vibrations of the paved road had given way to the bumpier terrain five minutes back as the weathered blue pick-up truck turned onto some obscure dirt road Tracey was sure he wouldn’t be able to pick out again if he had to. Somehow, as if that thought wasn’t unsettling enough, the rocky climb up the bluff had him bouncing uncomfortably against the steel door frame, and the occasional jolt that heaved him forward without warning, was starting to make him doubt their safe arrival at Kingsman Bluff. The rugged winding country road didn’t seem to bother Paulette any though, as she navigated through it in a way that told Tracey she had done it countless times over.
Paulette seemed nice enough, Tracey decided, but she sure didn’t have much to say, and when she did, it seemed more to Tracey, that her words were just part of some mental list overflowing into a place where he could hear them. Then again, it wasn’t like she was happy about this arrangement, or him being there. Truth be told, he was only half listening anyway, his thoughts were elsewhere as he recalled the scene back in the courtroom earlier and the way his old man had hung him out to dry. Bastard, he thought, his knuckles turning white as he gripped the door handle tighter, but if it was out of anger or self preservation, he didn’t know.
”You’ll stay in the bunkhouse with Will,”; Paulette said, checking off another item from her mental list.
”Yes Ma’am,”; Tracey mumbled in acknowledgment, as if he had a choice, he thought.
Tracey knew he had been out to Kingsman Bluff before, had to have been, since he caused all that damage to their property, but hell if he could remember it, or how he got there. He shrugged to himself, that didn’t concern him as much as the words that still echoed in his head. You want me to treat you like a man; well you got it, Son. You’re on your own this time.
”What are you saying Mr. Marshall?”; Judge Whitman asked as he looked down at Frank Marshall over his wire-rimmed glasses. “Reparations need to be made to the Kingsman property.”;
”Your Honor, what I am saying, is that it seems that Tracey will have to find another way to make those reparations himself, ‘cause I’m not paying for it anymore,”; Frank Marshall declared adamantly, with a stubborn tug on his jacket lapels, his suspenders showing at his plump waistline.
”Hmmm,”; Judge Whitman mumbled, weighing the remaining options. “It seems that I’m left with no other choice then, but to have this young man make the repairs himself,”; he decided out loud.
”Your Honor, there must be some other way,”; Paulette Kingsman stood insistent, plenty perturbed that things had gone in this direction.
”I’m sorry Mrs. Kingsman, but I don’t see any other way. This young man has no money, and no job, and the only resource he has to make these reparations to you, is himself,”; he concluded.
To read more, check out the rest of the story here.
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Another week, another weekly update for you to catch on the news you might have missed this week. And no, your eyes aren't deceiving you, Renee isn't doing the blog this week so hopefully I won't screw it up. By the way, did you notice it was her birthday this week? Make sure you don't miss the chance to wish her a belated birthday if you haven't already! Now, on to the highlights of the week.
And don't miss Myr's update with some info about the site on his personal blog:
Negative Splits by Cia *Premium*
Down a Darkened Path by Ronyx
Mine! by Cia
Poetry by Renee by Renee Stevens
The Hollow Hills by Valkyrie
Cards on the Table by Headstall
Choices by LitLover
Cozy Contemplations by Headstall
timmy's poetry by Mikiesboy
Hope everyone has had a great week so far and is looking forward to the weekend. What better way to start it off than with brand new prompts! If you've been feeling stuck, or maybe just want to do something a little different, maybe one of these prompts will jump start a new idea. Just remember, prompt responses under 1,000 words must be posted as part of a collection. Also, to make it so that nobody feels like their prompt response is getting overlooked, we've changed the format. Rather than us picking the prompt responses to share, authors can share their response in the comments. Provide a small excerpt and a link and help people find your prompts!
Prompt 592 - Challenge
Tag – Details
Describe your favorite object. Try to use as many senses as you can in your description, making the details come alive for your reader.
Prompt 593 – Creative
Tag – First Line
What did you promise this time?
So, did you write a prompt response last week? Share it with us!
I took time out from writing the final part of my current book, not because of lack of inspiration or knowing about how it would all end, but because it is emotional. I never thought that you might get so involved, so attached, to a story and the characters that you would shed tears writing their history.
That is exactly what has happened - and I still can't believe it. I don't know how this came about. From the start it was emotional, and a few tears, but now... as I approach the end, it is not a few tears, but buckets, as nearly every chapter appears charged with emotion. It is hard to write with tears in your eyes.
I feel ridiculous. It is after all only a story I invented, even if it is set in the real world of today, nethertheless, I created the characters - or did I? Perhaps this sounds totally crazy, but I am not at all certain about this anymore, the characters seem to have come alive all on their own. I am writing them, but then again I am writing some things without actually thinking, some words, some reactions, just happen. Notice, I am not saying all, else then I really would be crazy!
Sometimes life sends you the most beautiful gifts in an ugly wrapping.
Last Sunday our new stable had a visit from a trouble maker. Luckily no person or animal got hurt, but the damage was huge. Broken fences, so the animals got out. Broken furniture, broken windows in our trailer, he even broke the walls of it with a spade. Sprayed all over with paint. Shattered glass tables and all our careful arranged flowers pulled out.
When I got the call, I was just glad, that the N. (19 year old girl), came too late to meet this person and so was safe.
I went there, talked to the nice police officer, who was more worked up about the mess than me and asked myself, when have I got so though, seeing all our hard work from three months destroyed and even feeling „Yes, live is like this sometimes.“
We started cleaning up, made planes how to get things fixed without a lot of money, talking to the insurance, which doesn't cover anything, because it was vandalism and not stealing etc.
Then one of our neighbors came over. His car got destroyed by the same person. He is a very nice, very rich man and said, he will help us a little bit, if the insurance won't pay. That alone is very nice. But at the next day I got the notice, that the people of the village founded a donation collection on Facebook for us. Seems that our work in the last three month hasn't gone unnoticed, and we already made friends in the village. I am touched, very deep touched.
But what overwhelmed me most, were the events in the last two days.
The police got the person, who did all the damage. It is a resident of a home next to us.
We have a nice small talk communication in the last month. They play soccer in the garden and when N. happens to be in the stable, the ball flies over the fence, so the guys have a reason to talk to this pretty young girl – very nice and polite.
The recent events have up set the other residents so much, they now fear, that we would think bad of them all, which is totally not the case. The manager of the home came over, and we talked, got the back ground story about the trouble maker, but even before it was visible, that there were issues behind this, nobody causes such a havoc without having serious problems.
Nevertheless, the residents felt the need to say sorry to us. So they started their own donation collection, which is really overwhelming, cause they nearly posses nothing. We told them, that there is no need for this, and we cherish their effort. And of course we have to be careful, because we don't want to hurt their pride.
So we found a good solution, I think. On Sunday we will have a little grill out party with them. And they will help us to repair things, that still need to be tended to.
We invited them to come over with their kids before and now found out that they didn't dare to come over in the last month, because they thought they would have to make an appointment first.
Now we could explain, that we have an open gate for everyone, if we are at the stable.
That is nice.
So a bad thing happened, but brought people who barely know each other closer together, increased our understanding for each other. A gift life send to us to special notice, so that is, why I am writing it down.
Sagittarius’ Arrow of Fate
Another strange ritual I’m learning about is college football. I may have been raised around religious fanatics but in their zeal, football fans make the Prophet look like a dilatant. Jeb and I were at the Crenshaw household enjoying the South Eastern Conference Championship game. The game is interesting, if not conspicuously violent, but the real fun is watching the fans. This is a big deal for them with traditions that go back over generations. There’s never been a preacher that could stir as much real passion as an untimely fumble by Alabama. Even if you lose, the food is great. A part of that tradition involves eating really good food that's bad for you.
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I, dressed only in black denims and boots
Watch you strip down to nothing
You are always unclothed, baring all to me
For you belong to me, you are mine
You stand at room’s centre, in submission
Rising for my chair I circle you, gaze at you
When my hand caresses your back you flinch
The skin there still soft, unscarred, sweet
You utter no sound as I walk around you
I want you, desire you, control you
My own manhood, hard, wanting
And I could take you, but I too must wait
I take your hand and pass it over my hardness
No sound from you, but I see you swallow
“Control it, boy,” I whisper
As your own member betrays you
You breathe deeply in your concentration
In your scramble for control of your body
“On your knees, boy. Eyes on me.”
You gaze up at me as you comply
I retake my seat as you kneel
There is disappointment in your eyes
You will learn patience, control
And learn I know what’s best
So I was talking to some friends about food the other day, and the subject of mac and cheese came up somehow.
Well I opened my mouth and said, “I have a good recipe for mac and cheese.” So a few people wanted it. And then they said, you should put it on your blog. So, here it is.
It’s nothing fancy. And it’s really not good for you. But it is so good! So good that people I work with like the leftovers!
I started with my mother’s recipe. Adapted it with flavors we like. Took out a little of the fat.
The big secret? My kids think that it’s really hard to make. It’s really not. It’s all about the prep. Once you get started with this, you really can’t stop.
We don’t bake it, there’s no time. See, I’m short, so I need a tall person to come help me drain the noodles. When I call for help, it’s like ringing the dinner bell! The kids drain the pasta, then line up like Pavlov’s dogs.
This is a basic recipe. You can add to it, take away from it. We add cubed ham and frozen peas. I add the peas to the colander and drain the pasta over them to thaw them. I toss the ham cubes into the cheese sauce. It’d be great with some green chiles, or chopped bacon.
Please let me know if you try it.
½ onion finely diced
2 tablespoons margarine, or 1 tablespoon butter and 1 tablespoon bacon fat
2 tablespoons AP flour
2 cups milk
1 box low sodium chicken broth
½ pound box Velveeta, cubed, or in chunks about the same size
1 cup shredded cheddar, colby jack, or Mexican blend cheese
¼ to ½ cup parmesan
1-2 pounds macaroni elbows
This recipe is all about the prep, as once you get started, you really cannot stop. So have all your stuff ready.
Start by filling a pot with water and putting it to boil, have the noodles ready, and once it boils, put the noodles in, adding some salt.
Heat a deep sauce pan, and melt your fat, saute your onions until fragrant and soft.
Sprinkle the flour over this, and whisk it well for 3 or 4 minutes. This is your roux, you need to cook the flour a little but not make this dark at all.
Now add the milk, slowly, whisking the whole time, making sure to break up any lumps of flour you find. Once it starts to bubble it will thicken quickly. Switch to a spoon now. Add some chicken broth, maybe a half cup at a time, you want this thick like a gravy, not like concrete. Let it bubble and thicken for a few minutes. You’ll need to stir almost constantly so it doesn’t stick and burn.
Taste and add salt and pepper if needed.
Now add the Velveeta a little at a time stirring to get it melted, once all that is in, add the cheddar the same way. Then dump in the parm and stir until it’s all creamy.
Turn the heat way down, stirring regularly if the noodles aren’t done.
Drain the noodles and add to the cheese sauce. If it’s too thick, add some chicken broth.
At this point it’s ready to eat, or you can bake it in a 350 degree oven with some buttered bread crumbs on top until golden brown.
Welcome to my little potpourri of updates. It has been a little while again. As it happens, I get way too busy bouncing all over the place with all the stuff I'm doing. Some personal stuff first... the project I started two years ago with my mother after dad died is now pretty much done. We converted the back porch of the house into a very nice family room that is pretty much all windows. (There are 15 windows in the room). It turned into a great place for me to write and to read when I stayed there during my vacation from work. Mom is also very happy with it, which is the most important part, of course.
I can also report that the mancave I built in the barn at moms is also finished stage 1. Aside from the nice Phillips Hue lights in the room, I have some black lights mounted on the back of the projection screen. There are no windows, so this room can truly be a cave.
As for the site, we have worked out the majority of the bugs from the transition to the new software. Just in time for the next transition, it seems. Forum software 4.2 is in Beta 8 and is scheduled to be released in the first week of August or there about. We will be waiting until 126.96.36.199 or so before we upgrade if we even have our software update ready for that. Stories do work with the update already, but some new features aren't integrated yet. We hope to have that all set by the time the software is ready to upgrade. The upgrade to the new version should not cause all the issues we just went through, as the hardest parts are now behind us.
I am also in the process of writing the specifications for the next feature update to stories that focuses on adding the "Reading Lists" feature into stories. This will also replace our dodgy "Favorite Author" and "Favorite Stories" list with something much more useful and obvious.
In addition to that stuff, I have also been researching business and marketing stuff. With our business model, we need a constant flow of new people and new material and the success of eBooks has taken away a lot of our feeder streams. These means that we have to take more effort, time and resources in order to further develop our own stream. We are working on a bunch of stuff that's more long term development in nature. It is exactly what the revenues from Premium Content gets sunk into. If you don't already subscribe, doing so keeps this train moving:
In addition to all of that, we are also working on developing more writing resources for our authors. Comicality has been very kind in helping me out with articles for a new feature that will be coming later this summer. I hope to get that set up so we have regular articles and other helpful material to be released on a regular schedule.
I've also been making an effort to write something every day. None of it is worthy of you guys seeing yet, but it will be when I get back into the regular swing of things. I promise.
That's all for now. I'll try to do this more regularly, even if it is just to bs a bit.
Just thought I would let you known what my schedule is for posting chapters of my current stories.
Frontier - Every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday (Unless my editor tells me to slow down, then Saturdays postings will be dropped)
P.S The days listed above, are Western Australian Standard TIme:- UST +8 hrs
It's time for another author promo! I'm completely out of these promos, so if you'd like to promo your own work, take a look at the thread for guidelines and then PM me. For this month, our featured promo spot is for Mikiesboy. There were three questions that Mikiesboy had to answer for each story. The questions were What gave you the idea for this story? What was your favorite thing about writing this story? & Please tell us something about this story that is not already in the description.
22 stories · 4,280 comments · 193,265 total words
Description: Life after the past isn't what most of us dream of, or hope for.
What gave you the idea for this story?
The first chapter was written years ago but there was a push for dystopian stories at the time, so I’m sure I was influenced by those. Most of those stories had very evil overlords who had taken over and controlled others. I just wondered if that was how it would be. I wondered what would likely end most of the human race - war or disease. I chose disease, a virus.
What was your favorite thing about writing this story?
Creating the characters I think and then building their relationships, but most important making sure it felt real.
Please tell us something about this story that is not already in the description.
It’s a love story really. There tough times, sad ones, and ones filled with joy. It’s Dave’s story, his life, and what happens as a result of his humanity, and his choices.
Description: Levko is a rent boy who supports his roommate and pimp, but his life changes one dark night.
What gave you the idea for this story?
My life did. My experience was very much like Lev’s, but how we each ended up are much different.
What was your favorite thing about writing this story?
At the time I wrote this I’d read a few BDSM stories which seemed over-the-top and a little unreal. So I decided to draw from my experience and bring my voice, and take on the subject.
Please tell us something about this story that is not already in the description.
This is really two stories, Lev finds a second life and he also finds the strength to leave one and accept the other.
Description: Faris and James meet life head-on, together.
What gave you the idea for this story?
It was a prompt. I hadn’t been a member here long when I saw a Prompt #447 – The Gift: You haven’t been feeling well lately, but you still try to keep up with your normal routine. You’ve been asked to a party, and although you don’t feel well, you decide to go. The only request is that as a gift you give something homemade. What do you give as your gift?
What was your favorite thing about writing this story?
Oh, that has to be the two main characters, Faris and James and their dog, Larry. I laughed until I cried writing Delicious. Faris is Scottish, big and sexy and James is slim and slight, and both madly in love with each other. They get up to all sorts of adventures. I wanted to write something funny and I kind of surprised myself in that I managed it. I hope.
Please tell us something about this story that is not already in the description.
There are (so far) 9 separate short stories in this collection featuring these two and their dogs. Stories range from how they met and married, to dealing with rats, birthdays, and illness.
I like labels... self imposed labels of course. It's human nature to want to put things in little boxes, even things that don't fit. Organizing them by similar characteristics so we can better understand and define them. I like this. But I believe people can only be labeled by themselves in most cases (if you have red hair your a red head deal with it or dye it lol) so I label myself and express these labels loud. So no one can do it for me and get it wrong!
I have always known who I was, my personality has been the one thing I was always sure of (even my flaws).
I am intelligent
I am emotionally strong
I am open-minded
I am confident in my abilities
I can be a bitch
I can be judgmental (though I usually keep it to myself, and I'm working on this one)
I am wise beyond my years
I am independent
I am an introvert
I am a book-worm
These are my self-imposed labels...
but some of them are a little murky these days...
I am a ....girl? NO ...boy?both?neither? umm.... ask me later.
I am straight... umm except when I'm a boy then I guess I'm gay? so Can I be sometimes gay? ... Umm... I like cock.
Am I still MOTHER even if I'm boy?
Can I be confident and insecure at the same time?
Ugg... I'm too old to deal with this shit!
This was a message to my Patrons, which means there will be some information in here which will likely make no sense to you, but I wanted this to be known.
This last weekend was hell. The only worse weekends I've ever had involved loved ones dying, just to give you a measure of perspective. Over the course of 48 hours, my already bad mood for the week (because the week was fairly shitty, too) went full depression.
There's a lot going on, but I'm only going to tell you about the two things which are affecting me the most, because they also affect you, and make me question a lot of things.
First, we'll set the stage a bit...
On Friday night, I had to do inventory at work. This kept me there fairly late, though I was home before Midnight. I had volunteered to work the opening shift the next day, despite knowing I'd be there late on Friday, so having only a six hour window for sleep was on me. I normally can function well enough on 5 hours of sleep, so I wasn't too worried about it, but I hadn't accounted for insomnia and anxiety to keep me up well past 3:00 am...
So, I started Saturday on two hours of sleep, which has probably compounded this whole thing, but it is what it is...
When I walked out to my car on Saturday morning, I found out it had been burglarized. This is hardly a new experience for me. I live in a bad area and my back doors don't lock. There's really not much I can do about it other than try to avoid leaving anything valuable in my car.
Well, I had three copies of "From the Cup of the Worthless" in my car, and these were stolen from my trunk. Why they stole these and not the other books in my car I can only guess, since selling an unknown self-published book can't be easy for a thief, especially since it's difficult for me, the author, to do.
And so I can only speculate, and that speculation doesn't take me anywhere good. What will they do to my books once they find out they can't sell them? Throw them away? Deface them in rage? Burn them out of spite?
My art is in the possession of unsavory characters, and I think this is the closest I'll ever come to knowing what it feels like to have a child get kidnapped. I realize it's probably not even close, but my books are my children... and I feel devastated.
That set the tone for Saturday, and I did not have a good day in any sense of the word. I finally slept again on Saturday night, but it was restless, and full of dreams I'd rather not dwell on.
I tried to have a good day on Sunday. I tried to do a lot of things to take my mind off of everything, and then I finally laid down for a nap, but before I did, I decided to check my email.
Which is when I found out that someone had stolen one of my stories and put it up on Wattpad, claiming to be the original author. Thankfully a reader noticed several of this individual's posted stories did not belong to him and he decided to investigate all of them. He wasn't familiar with my work, but he managed to track it down anyway.
After investigating the matter and contacting WattPad, I was drained. I'd planned to work on chapter 6 of "The Pious Road to Perdition", but I couldn't find the energy.
I couldn't find the energy this morning, either. In fact, I seem to have even less enthusiasm than I did yesterday. I am emotionally drained, which is cancer to art. I have never felt so violated in my life. I am more depressed than I have ever been, a feat I would have thought impossible before it happened.
And I don't know what's going to happen. I don't know when or even IF I'll be able to write again, especially something as emotional as "The Pious Road to Perdition".
And this sucks, and I realize it sucks for you, too, but I don't have any other answer for you. This is breaking me.
That's all there is to say.
First Amendement to the U. S. Constitution:
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.
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Wen my niece was 3, I was in my sewing phase. Some fabric company had just come out with a set of watermelon fabrics, with one looking like the rind, and another being red with white and black watermelon seeds. I also found a pattern for preschool girls dresses that was a watermelon. I made it. It had this huge bib like collar that was half a watermelon, and the pockets were triangle watermelon slices. I even found lady bug buttons and added felt leaves and ladybugs.
It was my first zipper, and I messed it up. My niece's stepdad's mom replaced it for me. So for years my niece insisted Grandma C made it, even though everyone including Grandma C told her that's I made it.
the dress was a swing dress and my niece was a twig, very tiny. She literally wore the dress for about 4 years, two as a dress, then two more as a top?
Dress Lilly now has a watermelon dress, and my niece wants it. Odd to see I influenced her tastes as we aren't close at all.
On may 9th, 2017 British Columbians voted for change. Today, they have finally gotten it. The Legislature voted 44-42 in favour of the NDP amendment to the Throne Speech expressing no-confidence in the Clark government. Because of that vote, Premier Clark and her cabinet have resigned. Later today, after meeting with both Premier Clark and Opposition Leader Horgan of the NDP, the Leftenant-Governor has invited John Horgan to form a government and Cabinet, accepting the resignation of the Clark government.
Today is the end of a long, 16 year nightmare. Leftist, progressive citizens in British Columbia have been crying out for change from massive infrastructure projects that serve no purpose. We've cried out against the shortchanging of children in order to pursue a fossil fuel industry that won't be competitive. We've demanded an education system that's funded properly, a welfare system that provides a fair payment to our least fortunate, and a health care system that works for everyone.
The NDP-Green coalition will not be perfect. They'll fight. It will be hell to get through a Legislature that is deadlocked 43-43 on all votes, with the Speaker needing to save every piece of legislation from the abyss. But we have a chance to make life better for millions of people right here, right now. Every single thing this government does will come under attack by the media, and it's unlikely that this government will serve a second 4 year term in 2021. But in the four (possibly less if the Greens abandon us or someone gets sick) years we have to us, we're going to change this small part of the world for the better. Universal child care, a basic income pilot project, billions of dollars in education funding and the expansion of the tar sands required by federal law. We're going to protect our environment and put thousands back to work on environmentally friendly infrastructure.
Welcome back, New Democrats. You've been given a chance to govern. Follow our principles, and when you see yourself starting to waver, remember that over one million British Columbians put their hopes in you. Don't let us down.
Now, it's time to go celebrate, every bar in town is hosting an NDP victory party tonight!
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This book belongs to Cole:
Standing at the airport in New York. I watched all the other people grabbing cabs, meeting with friends, or others like me excited for what new adventures this place had to offer. It was still so crazy that after only visiting once I moved here. I really had no idea what I was getting myself into. There was no going back now. I had said good bye to my life in Portland, now ahead of me stood my next chapter. Nothing was going to hold me back. It was my time.
All those years I made sure to put others first. Yes I moved to Portland because I had wanted to, but I had stayed because others wanted me there. Now that I finally made a move I had to make sure that I always enjoyed whatever it was I got myself into. There was no telling what would happen first. Would I meet someone? Would I finally make the goals I had wanted? Maybe I would find a new desire out here. I couldn’t stop smiling I just wanted to get to my new apartment and get this life started.
“Cole,” I turned to find Molly, she had decided to meet me at the airport “this is so exciting, I’m so glad that you are finally here.”
“Me too.” I was excited, but also very nervous. I had never made such a big step in my life before. I was very proud of myself, yet I was scared of what this move was really going to be like
I had flown into JFK so now we were on our long ride to our apartment. I had never been to Brooklyn before so all this was new to me, seeing the apartments that were the projects, the random subway tracks that stood above us, and all the buildings that covered the ground. I was in such amazement at this place, fear was now leaving my body. I was so excited of all the new things I knew I would be experiencing for the first time. Molly filled me in on the neighborhood, only I could barely concentrate. I was at an awe at the new scenery. To me a place like this had only existed in movies and dreams only now it was real. This was a new life, a new start for me and I was going to make it the best that I could.
“Here we are.” I looked around at the street that I would now call home. There were projects not even a block away and a lot of acetic Jewish people walking around. The building next door had a bum sleeping on the stoop, not to mention all the graffiti covering most. “I know it looks a little bad but trust me we are okay.”
Molly showed me around the apartment it was very nice. A large living room an actual kitchen and we ironically had our own laundry room. My room was in the front which thankfully had a fire escape to go out on, which I got being a smoker and all, plus Molly didn’t want me to smoke pot in the house. Her room was on the other end good size and closed off from the rest of the apartment. Since she worked nights it made sense to give her that room. Plus the front room was the larger one so I was good. It was actually perfect for the two of us.
Once I got a little settled in it was time to hit the town and that we did. Molly took me out to the bar she was working at in Soho. It was nice a little more upscale than I was expecting, but when you know someone that works there you’re set. Here it was my first night in Manhattan and I was not having to wait in a line, I just walked right past everyone into the bar. I couldn’t lie I felt a little important even though I really wasn’t. Molly and I pretended that we were. After having a few drinks there and meeting her new work friends it was off to a new bar.
I couldn’t believe what the night life was really like here, as I stood outside having a cig watching everyone else out. People dressed up so elegant while some where dressed like trash. The people of this city were so different. I was curious at what messes I could get myself into. This night we partied as if we were on vacation and that I needed too. I didn’t have work for another week so I needed to learn my new home. It was still so hard to believe that I had actually moved here. The fact that I had done this still surprised me. It was time for me to make that change in my life.
As the next few days past I spent them settling in and walking around my block, there was so much to learn between streets and train systems. Before I really took this place by storm I needed to learn where I was. With that being said lets jump forward to a few days. I wanted to find my neighborhood gay bar, so off I went. The closest one was on Metropolitan and Lorimer, we can call it Comfort. Since I was living in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, I wanted to have places close. Now this bar wasn’t that close, but drunk Cole could still walk home.
It turned out to be an okay gay bar. It was a very mixed crowd, some nights a lot more lesbians while some nights all hipsters. Every now and then your sexy black guy came through, but their groups never stayed very long. On the slower nights you could always find some guy that kept off to himself and I knew he was under cover. During the week the bar wasn’t too busy so people came to find their little fix. I knew about men only soon I would learn that woman too had their secrets.
I had met this girl, my lesbian friend I call Scissor. One night the bar had been pretty busy to the point that if you found a spot at the bar you wouldn't move. That’s where I was, sitting at the bar. I could tell numerous people were getting annoyed with me there, but I didn't care. So I ordered another drink.
I turned to see a young girl, tall very skinny with long brown hair. She was an attractive girl and you could tell by her appearance she really didn't take too much time to get ready. None the less she seemed like a nice girl, and that she was.
“You here alone?”
She turned to me and smiled “Yep thought it would be a different crowd.”
“Me too.” we both looked around “how bout we drink alone together.”
“Yes.” and we cheered to that.
From that point on she and I went out as often as we could. Scissor too had just moved here from Philadelphia and was living not too far from the bar. Most nights we spent just hanging out back chain smoking, drinking, and talking. It was nice meeting someone so fast that I could see being a friend. She told me all about her life and about her many lady friends. I was now learning that sometimes women also hid their curious sides. Scissor told me most times they didn’t want to let men know they were bi, realizing that could open to doors to something else.
She had been dating a lot since she had moved here, a lot more than me, which now I knew I needed to step it up. Scissor was now dating this girl named Penny, they had met at some lesbian thing or a party, anyways things had been getting pretty serious for her to the point they were talking about living together. “So Penny is finally coming out here tonight.” She told me one night at the bar, fast forwarding a month or so later. Penny was an older woman from England. She had moved here for work and so far had decided to stay.
“She should be here soon.”
We sat in our normal seats at the bar had a few drinks and caught up on each other’s week. It wasn’t long till I noticed a guy standing not too far from us. He looked as if he stood a little shorter than me. He had the sweetest smile I couldn’t help but smile back. For the next few minutes we kept playing that staring and looking away real fast game. He was a very good looking man, his hair buzzed down pretty low, and from what I could see he looked to have a decent body on him, not too fit, but he did look as though he worked out some.
“You sexy bitches want a drink?”
Scissor and I turned to find Penny standing behind us “Babe,” Scissor jumped up giving her new woman a kiss “Penny this is Cole.”
We ordered more drinks as Penny told me all about herself. The two of them looked so cute together it made me want to meet someone. And that was when that guy caught my eye again, only this time he was standing all alone in a corner. I decided why not, why not go and talk to him. There was really nothing to lose.
“Hi.” I said as I walked up to him.
“Hey.” He said as his smile grew. That was when I realized how cute this guy really was.
“I’m Cole,” I couldn’t help but notice that he was looking around the place, it was as if he were making sure no one he knew was there. “everything okay?”
“Yeah but I kind of want to get out of here.”
“Oh okay.” I was a little shocked, but what can you do? Just get another drink and move on to the next.
“Hey you want to go for a walk?” he said to me as I had turned to leave.
I stopped and smiled, okay it wasn’t me it was something else that made him want to leave and now I wanted to know. “Sure.” I went over to tell Scissor I was going to head out. She and Penny were also leaving. There was some new lesbian bar opening in the city, Penny was friends with the owner so they were off to continue their night.
We walked around Williamsburg. I told him all about my move out here. How I had grown up in a small town and a little bit about my Portland life. He told me he was from Turkey, his family had moved out here when he was very young. He had been going to school in the city and had some real goals set for himself. Of course came the one thing I should have seen, no one knew he was gay. Well only two friends did, two he had met in college. His family and all his other friends had no idea, in fact he had just recently broken up with his girlfriend and had decided to venture out into being with men.
I didn’t realize how long we had been walking until I noticed we were in my neighborhood. Molly was working late so I decided to invite him in. Once inside he pulled me towards him softly kissing my neck, his tongue slowly licked up my face till our lips met. His kisses were hard and wet, it felt as if he was finally getting the one thing he had always dreamed of. I wasn’t sure if he had ever been with a guy, by his actions I felt this could be his first. We made our way into my room where he pushed me down onto my bed.
The Middle Eastern stood there, let’s call him that since he was Middle Eastern, I watched as he took his clothes off exposing his decent, but very hairy body to me. So far with all the men I had been with they had little to no body hair, not that I mind body hair, I don’t, but this guy was hairy. I had always heard most Middle Eastern men were and now I found out for myself. The good thing was luckily his back was still hairless, well not his lower back which I didn’t care. I thought he was hot and I was attracted to him. He stood there looking a little nervous so to help him relax and get back into the mood I moved down taking his dick into my mouth. I used one of my hands to push his pubic hair back, it was so long and thick plus it tickled my face every time I went down. Surprisingly he had a nice dick not very long, maybe a close five inches, but it was still pretty thick. I could work with this one.
He stood there moaning and enjoying what my mouth was doing to him, he smelled pretty sweet. I was doing a very good job sucking his dick and he was letting me know. Soon he pushed me back down onto the bed and began to take my clothes off. I reached over to gather all we would need and got him ready.
Once wrapped and lubed up he climbed on top of me throwing my legs on his shoulders. Before I could tell him to go slow he forced his way into my ass, as deep as he could. Not even a slow inch by inch push, it was a slam all the way in, making me cry out so loud in pain, but that didn’t faze him. Each time he pushed he went a little faster and harder. He watched my face the whole time he fucked me. He never slowed down just kept going the same fast pace. I tried to get him to slow down so we could really enjoy, he took that as fuck harder. I didn’t think he could go any harder than he already was. He kept me in the same position the whole time, I moaned and cried. Pain shot all over my body but the pleasure was doing its best to come through. By the way he was fucking made me feel that we were in some sort of race, a race to save the world and if he stopped for a second it could all end.
“Oh yeah, oh, oh,” he began to moan which also meant he went faster. Now I was finally getting into it, the pain was all gone, my body was starting to tingle and I could feel his body tensing. “Oh, oh.” he called out then let out a loud “Yes” I could feel him pulsing and twitching inside of me I knew that was it. He had finished, he had gotten his right as I finally got into it. He kissed me and whispered “Thanks.” Then he got up and went to shower.
I laid there rethinking our night. Yeah he was a nice guy, yes he was hiding his sexuality, but that didn’t mean he had to fuck me like that. It was odd when it came to a lover like him. Now I knew with females it wasn’t that easy to get them off so if that was how he fucked, how could any girl have gotten off? What I never understood was when it came to sex there were rules to this game, make sure that you please and satisfy the person you are with. If you worry about them and they worry about you then everyone gets what they need. What I was now seeing with some of these under cover or curious guys, it was all about that orgasm.
Right after his shower he left not really saying too much but another thank you. I sat outside on my fire escape smoking a cig. I could see him walking to the train “I don’t know, it’s all weird that even in a place so big and open to anything I still met a guy that was undercover.” I was talking to Cynthia on the phone.
“Well maybe it’s just because guys can sense something about you that makes them comfortable enough to act out on their fantasies.”
“So it’s the curse, or maybe they aren’t gay and are just Colesexual.” We both laughed at my stupid comment. I knew that most of these guys were gay only they would never admit it. If he wanted to stay in the closet and just have some fun on the side then that was his life. I knew what I wanted and needed so I would just worry about me.
A couple days had passed before I heard anything from the Middle Eastern, it was a text that he sent asking me to come over, but it would have to be after midnight. Apparently he had two roommates and they had no idea he liked men. He was going to sneak me in once they both had gone to bed, which felt so high school to me, but I was horny and decided to give him another try. Maybe all I had to do was take control and show him how to really please a man.
Since it was still early Molly and I went out to get some drinks at the bar that was around the block from our apartment, we will call it DSLR. It was a nice fancy restaurant with a great bar. We made friends with one of the bartenders there, James. He was a nice tall white dude from the south and was now living in New York. He had worked there for almost a year and was really liking it. Every time we went in he would hook us up with drinks. Maybe it was because of Molly, which he would tell me later on that he wanted to sleep with her. So instead of making things weird for them I would just drink and enjoy making new friends.
Molly had to work the late shift that night so from there she went to work. I went home to freshen up and relax. James had his break coming up and thankfully he had brought a few joints to work so he came by and smoked me out. We talked about life and goals. I learned he was living with his ex and they were still having sex, but he also had a new girlfriend that had no idea who his roommate really was. Guys had such a weird way of seeing things and how they choose to live their lives. I knew I was just as bad only I was single so I was able to live however I wanted. Now James wasn’t a bad guy he treated both girls good. Still went behind their backs meeting new girls, most men just want more pussy.
To me a relationship is where you should have complete trust in each other and never let anyone else ever get in the way. I knew when I finally met the right guy I would show him nothing but love and respect along with only letting him have me. No matter what I had gone through with these guys I still had some hope that there was a good one out there for me. That one day I too would find the one I had always dreamed of. After seeing most of my friends find love I knew I needed to branch out and find what I was really meant for. I really had no idea if it was love or maybe I was just meant to enjoy life and make crazy memories.
I sat there waiting for the Middle Eastern to text me the okay to come over. I knew there would be nothing more than just sex so I wasn’t going to try and force anything more. It was just so weird having to sneak around just to get laid. Here I had my own place, plus I was alone, but he insisted on me going there. I didn’t have any problems with the down low part. I was more worried about how to act and what to do if I’m seen. I stopped worrying about all that. I wanted to have sex with him again, he was sexy and since the first time was a little bad I felt maybe this time around we would be better. Now we knew each other’s bodies maybe he would be able to really satisfy me and make me cry his name.
He lived far from me so I had to take a car service there, which the distance and the spending money should have been the first sign for me not to go. Once I had finally gotten there I waited outside for twenty minutes. Every now and then I would call the car service to come get me, but they were busy so I waited. I was told not to ring the buzzer or call him, I had to text and he would come down and get me. This guy seemed to not care about any one, I now had no desire to stay and let him have me. When he finally came to the door he stood there in his boxers, he knew what to do to make me want him. He knew I wanted sex so he would tease me and make me want to stay.
We went straight to his room. He had two locks on his bedroom door, which he locked “Sorry my roommate just went to bed.”
“Yeah well you could have just come to my place.”
“Yeah, but I have a lot of work to do right now and really couldn’t leave, but next time,” he moved stuff off the bed and took his shorts off “come on get naked I want to fuck.” So I did as I was told.
I lay there and he climbed on top of me putting my legs on his shoulders. Again he pushed in as hard as he could I cried out and all he did was cover my mouth with his hand. No foreplay, no kissing, not a thing, he just went straight to it. He fucked with such force and speed I couldn’t help but moan. He held his hand tight as he went on doing me the exact same way he had the first time. He fucked so hard and was going so fast I had no time to let my body relax and fall into him. I tried so hard to get into it only I couldn’t.
“Haaa,” I heard someone screaming from the next room “No, no, haa.”
“What is that?” I panicked pushing him off of me.
“It’s nothing don’t worry about it,” he said as he turned me around so I was laying on my stomach “my roommate as turrets.” He pushed my head down so my mouth was covered by his mattress then he went right back to what he was doing. I tried moaning but I could barely make a sound. He was going so fast and this time my whole body was rocking back and forth.
I just gave in and laid there while he did his thing. It was sad to realize that a lot of people are just bad in bed. I felt after you got started your body tells the other what you want and their body should react to it too. Only this guy had no idea what he was doing, sex just wasn’t fuck as fast and hard as you can, making the other person scream and you’re doing it. He really had no clue what to do. Yes sometimes you just need a man to pin you down and take you hard. He never seemed to want to slow down to just move gently together. I was trying to understand how he felt, was this what he needed? I wondered if his ex-girlfriend liked this, so he figured everyone did. Then I wondered how many men he had actually been with because I was sure by now he would have known how to fuck a tight ass.
He finally made some random noise and it was all over, not a word he got up wiped himself off, threw the condom away and went back to his work. He sat there naked with our sex all over him but he worked and acted as if I wasn’t even there. I laid in his bed and waited to see if he would at least help me get off, but he didn’t even look my way. It was as if he getting off gave him more inspiration for his work, so instead of finishing I just got up and left. He did walk me to the door and all I got was a “bye” Nothing else was said only that, talk about being used.
I stood outside his apartment waiting on the cab to come pick me up so it was the perfect time to fill Cynthia in on my night.
“Yeah in all the bad ways.”
“So what are you going to do now?”
“Not see him again,” I finished the cigarette I had been smoking “if the sex were good I wouldn’t mind the sneaking but nothing about this is worth it. It’s so crazy though here I thought being in a place like New York I would meet someone, but these guys always find me.”
“Well it’s like your brother said no matter how hard you try or what you do, they will.” Cynthia was right, my brother had always made sure to remind me that these men would find their way into our lives. I would have to keep telling myself no matter what I would just live for the moment and enjoy what the world brought me, even if it were bad sex with a down low guy.
“That’s right, all these men are just for fun,” my car finally showed. I was more than ready to be home in my bed “well at least I can check a middle eastern off my list of things to do…..”
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...for a special someone...
… no rights have I to feel a certain way,
… no claim not pleading in pentameter,
… no earthly grip or hope my words will sway,
or trace the scope of their parameter.
Like a lawyer, skirting nine tenths of the law
to avoid thoughts of what I don’t possess,
my sad voice still reaches out to draw
belief in your heart for the love I confess.
… although no claim I have to your control,
… although no rights I assert to your mind,
… although mere trace publicly may extol,
no loud statements can anyone find.
But in my way, I possess you all the same,
And no judge or jury would ever lay blame.
Today, on the last day of school, we had several special visitors taking a tour of the building. The school I teach at specializes in non-native English speakers, recently arrived immigrants, refugees from war zones, and other historically under-served minorities. The amount of racial, cultural, ethnic, and linguistic diversity is staggering. This coming year, we are expanding to include a classroom strictly for kids who have just recently arrive in the US and don't have enough language and cultural knowledge to be in a mainstream classroom. Included in this group are several Syrian refugee children who had arrived in the United States several months ago and will be starting school with us in the fall in this program. They got to see the whole building and watch a few minutes of classes to see what school in like in America.When they came up to my room where I was teaching a small group, I noticed that one of the Syrian boys (maybe about 9 years old or so) couldn't stop smiling while he was looking around. He was giggling to himself and soaking in everything around him; the posters on the wall, the displayed artwork of students, the computers, everything. I heard him whisper something to the interpreter, and the interpreter translated it to the teacher leading the group as "he says, everything is so nice and pretty here". When I heard that I had to stop for a second. Our school is far from what I would consider nice. It's in a converted factory building in a industrial neighborhood with a lot of decay and blight. The inside is all unpolished concrete floors with walls that desperately need a new paint job. But to this kid, who came from hell on Earth, it was probably what he dreamed of always having. It was an opportunity he is probably overjoyed to have in a strange new country after being forced from everything he has ever known. Here we are, in our tiny little corner of this big city, about to hopefully give him, and other like him, a new opportunity in life. It's little moments like this that make all the stresses of this job worth it.I think it also sends an important message to refugees and immigrants like them that they are wanted here. Despite what our con man president and his hicks in the sticks supporters say, America will still welcome you and give you a chance to succeed. You can find peace and stability and your kids will have the opportunity to become even greater then you. We all need to take up that mantle as Americans.“Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed, to me: I lift my lamp beside the golden door.”
A quick update about what's happening in my neck of the woods.
Departures, a new chapter about my Demon will be making its appearance shortly in Hell_is.com. Chapters to this will post only as I have the time and inspiration.
My sequence of stories featuring Geoff and Tony will be extracted from my prompt collection and be posted separately so I can add other stories. This will mean I'll lose all the lovely comments but it's not the end of the world. I may take the opportunity to edit and alter the existing stories but essentially I'll be posting old stuff as new ...
My first chaptered story is getting close. Part 1 of a longer tale, I decided that I'd just about reached a point where I could stop, get it out there, and see what responses are forthcoming. Early versions of the first few chapters were posted on the GA test server. Never too late is the story of a coming out with a difference.
I've also been creeping out my long-suffering editor with the start of a supernatural tale. It came out of a prompt response but it's already much too long. It may be a stand-alone story or it might end up being my entry for the next anthology (Secret spaces).
So, all in all, I'm keeping myself out of mischief. As ever, I thank @Parker Owens for his skill, advice and patience.
Yep. I'm so frustrated at this point. I have so many writing projects on my computer at the moment, but I can't seem to make any progress on anything. I don't know if it's simply because the depression has reared its ugly head, if it's stress, or what is causing my issues. All I know is that I "want" to write, I just can't seem to make anything work the way I want it to. I don't think this is writer's block, at least not in the traditional sense of the word. Writer's block to me usually means that I have no ideas, no vision, nothing. I have the vision, just not the focus, the words, or anything that will actually allow me to write what's in my head. Right now I have:
Joined by Blood - revision
I want to publish Joined by Blood, but there are aspects of the story that need to be cleaned up and tweaked a bit. I know exactly what needs done, how to fix areas I'm not happy with, and generally I have everything in my head, but I just can't seem to get the words out.
Challenging Fate - revision
There was always more to Challenging Fate than what I allowed myself to write in the original. To be honest, it's possible I could make this into a novel instead of a novella. Just like with Joined by Blood, I know what I need to do, I just can't seem to do it.
Reece's Choice - expansion
I've always loved my story Reece's Choice and I want to expand it and publish it. I know what scenes need added. I know what needs changed, but again, I just can't focus.
Jerry & Chris: The Beginning - NEW
I really want to write a new Jerry and Chris tale. It's been a rather long time since I visited the guys and I thought it would be cool to see when they actually met, or at least got together. But I can't seem to even organize my thoughts on it.
Unnamed Story - NEW
This one would hopefully be for Dreamspinner Press' houseline, Dreamspun Desires. I know the plot, and it's one I'm actually pretty excited about, but I can't seem to get more than a scene here or there and then I falter. And what I do have, I'm not really sure I'm happy with.
Forging Trust - On Hold
Forging Trust has been on hold for a rather long time, and I'd really like to finish it. What I've already written is already up on GA, but I'm seriously considering unpublishing it and revamping a bit, clean it up, and then repost from the beginning. However I do, I'm tired of it being incomplete.
There's more. I probably have at least a dozen stories on my computer in various stages of completion, but I just can't seem to focus on anything. I've been camping a lot already this summer, and usually camping is the one place I can sit and write, regardless of whether I'm struggling to write at home. So far this summer, that hasn't been the case. Even when out camping, with the peace and quiet, and nothing else really going on, I just can't write. Then again, camping hasn't been as relaxing for me this year as it normally is. There has been so much going on, and for some reason I find myself on the verge of tears constantly. I thought, maybe, I'd found something that would help, but it didn't work out either and, in fact, it crashed and burned a fiery death.
I'm really hoping the next couple of days will help turn things around. I'm going back out camping, just until Saturday, with my best friend. Just me, her, and her little boy. I'm really hoping that spending some "sister time" together is what I need to help beat the slump into submission. *Fingers crossed*
I wrote this poem the other day after watching about five minutes of 'America's Got Talent'. Hope you can relate.
With curious gazes do we transfix
Our eyes to things bizarre;
O! how we know (or entertain)
Ideas that are so far
From things we maybe ought to think-
Or also entertain
But no heads turn, no gaze transfix
Upon me or my name-
I am the invisible; the sensible; the good;
And ev’rything opposed to it
(though nothing really should)
Is led, descending, into, the deepest depths I know,
With resounding shouts of glee:
“Watch him go! Watch it go!”
A droopy, weary figure draws
A picture in the sheen-
And though they may have followed laws
Not one can really glean
A story or a notion behind the shaky glyph;
But the who went is able to-
And does not save them from the cliff.
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Sorry About That
Well, first right off the bat, I want to apologize for the upgrade taking so long to get all the bugs worked out. I did not expect nearly 3 months to track all these bugs down. That said, there was 5 forum software updates and a server change in that same time frame. Each one of those updates caused unexpected surprises.
So where are we now?
As has been true since the first week or so, the major features work. Some of the integration features act unexpectedly on occasion. (This is especially true of the Activity Stream system).
Are there still bugs? Yes. There is nothing show-stopping left though. Now that the Author Follow is working properly you should be seeing more consistent notifications of new stuff.
Where are we going now?
I am still working with the programmer to eliminate the remaining bugs. Most of the bugs currently left are not generally visible to everyone. As I'm sure you noticed by now, some of the integration is pretty sensitive and fragile so fixing something over here, might break something over there. I think we have moved beyond the worst of it though. The next big thing on our agenda is Forum software 4.2 and Stories 2.1.
What is Forum Software 4.2?
While we have not been idol with our stories software updating, the forum software has also been going through a major overhaul. So, I'm sorry that you just got used to this set up and we're making more changes soon. The price of security and keeping software up-to-date is that we are at the mercy of the programmers and the changes they make. There are some really nice new features in the software we'll be using though, so it will be worth it. The two big ones are Clubs and Social Media Promotion. (Though I also like the new free Fluid forum where it takes all topics and shoves them into one giant list you can filter. It's pretty handy). You can see the same forum here, if you're interested: https://invisioncommunity.com/forums/
There is also a quick video flashing some stuff:
More information on Clubs:
What is in Stories 2.1?
Stories 2.1 is a vastly smaller upgrade then what we just went through. It is focusing on one core feature which I am calling Reading Lists. It will allow you to create two types of lists... people and stories. There are some default lists I'm planning... Favorite Authors (public), Favorite Stories(public), Reading History (defaults to private unless you choose to share), and To Read list (defaults to private). You'll be able to add your own lists.
Tying in with Clubs, there will also be, "recommended by club members" list. We will also have clubs like a writing circle where you can post a story like it was in the system, but be available only to the club members
The plan is to have Forums 4.2 and Stories 2.1 this summer.
Thanks everyone for the patience and understanding you've shown as we've gone through these upgrades.
Hey Everyone!... I'm a little to philosophical right now to find my creative center. This doesn't mean I can't put my mind to good use.
The question is: what does Pride mean to you? June is a month of celebration... However; what emotion does it evoke in you?
To me; Pride means celebrating and loving myself. I can say I am happy being Gay! This wasn't always the case.
Pride reminds me to thank the thousands who came before me. The ones who didn't experience the freedoms I'm allowed.