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    September's Classic Author Feature: The Sons of Memory by Stefan Schmidt

    By Cia

    A classic tale with a twist by a Classic GA author? How about that?! Check out this month's Classic Author feature, The Son's of Memory by Stefan Schmidt, a nearly 24k story all about sacrifice, monsters, misunderstandings, and maybe some mischief. Okay, we're talking about the Greek Gods, so there's going to be a whole lot of mischief!      Length: 23,966   Description: This is the ancient tale of Theseus, prince of Athens, who tries to stop Athens' tribute to Crete. He will not only meet a monster in a labyrinth but perhaps the love of his life. But the Gods are not always friendly. Being a plaything to the moods of the Gods, Theseus and Arian are stranded on the isle of Naxos where they will meet their fate and a God's private competition.   If you want to spread the word about Stefan Schmidt's story, download the graphic below and add it to your signature! Make sure you come back on Wednesday to see the excerpt I chose to share!
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  1. A classic tale with a twist by a Classic GA author? How about that?! Check out this month's Classic Author feature, The Son's of Memory by Stefan Schmidt, a nearly 24k story all about sacrifice, monsters, misunderstandings, and maybe some mischief. Okay, we're talking about the Greek Gods, so there's going to be a whole lot of mischief! 

     

    the sons of memory banner featuring minotaur statue

     

    Length: 23,966

     

    Description: This is the ancient tale of Theseus, prince of Athens, who tries to stop Athens' tribute to Crete. He will not only meet a monster in a labyrinth but perhaps the love of his life. But the Gods are not always friendly. Being a plaything to the moods of the Gods, Theseus and Arian are stranded on the isle of Naxos where they will meet their fate and a God's private competition.

     

    If you want to spread the word about Stefan Schmidt's story, download the graphic below and add it to your signature!

    Make sure you come back on Wednesday to see the excerpt I chose to share!

    Stefan Schmidt Sons of Memory Md.jpg

  2. As I had stated to Page and a couple others on Cott... we need to be aware and pay attention to our teens and how badgering and "Just kidding" remarks bring issues and tragedies... how we just don't know how much weight and burden it can produce...!!! Sadly... Dennis 191 is that example... we knew him as the crazy Hun that would go into fits at Cott Say and do CRAZY things...Not knowing the deeper issues and horrors he had and lived... Dennis191 had a mindset, but there were reasons for those mindsets... I knew Dennis had deeper rooted problems, dealing with teens for 27 years you tend to pick up on things, especially the boys, they will blow things off to their peers but in their alone time and internally it eventually peaks... Dennis peaked on GA before he left, became spiteful and rebellious to moderators and others as well... he was crying out the best way he knew how, and the only way he knew... Dennis and I remained in contact after he left we became very close as he had begun to allow me into his world... A very cruel and difficult world I might add... being a loaner not for fear... but of the penalty of letting anyone too close in his space. But I was very persistent every day to connect and encourage edify, and even hug from 5000 miles away. Christmas last year he was all alone and I could tell as it approached it bothered him even though he would never say it... because Dennis through a series of events always had to suck things up and cope with life as it was dealt to him... this all began at a very early time in his young life, his parents blamed him for being  born, continually calling him a worthless piece of crap... only to send him away After his Grandparents died ( his one and only outlet, he Loved his Grandparents) Dennis was sent to a boys Military school at the age of thirteen so his dad wouldn't have to look at him, the military School was located at the site of an old Anthrax testing ground. it was said to be safe, but it was just a story. Dennis had contracted Anthrax while there its effects were somehow  not life-threatening to him as with others 2 youth died... he was at the firing range when the staff person monitoring them became aggressive with Dennis and Dennis shot  and killed him they ended up out of fear of being found out to kick Dennis out of the School and send him back home to "Dad". Dennis went back to School at the Public Schools where he met His soul mate Jon who was the only thing keeping him going and giving him the love he lacked for the next two years. Then Jon because of his home and school Situations of bullies and an abusive stepfather... ended up Killing himself, leaving Dennis alone and angry again until last November when he was asked by his cousin who lived in Serbia to come and  spend the Holidays with them and if he liked it he could stay which was good for him to be around people who did care, and know what he had gone through. But we remained in contact and drew closer and I could even tell when he was getting ready to have one of his fits and divert it into something more positive... he did get better and even found work for a while... I had sent him funds on many occasions to help out as they don't make much there... we had talked about my Eye surgery and well he was the very First person I was able to see with my eye after surgery and he was proud of that, but there were many things still Haunting Dennis he had 3-4 times talked about committing suicide when he would return from the store or back from venturing out... he was Teased and ridiculed for being Hungarian and had gotten to the point he would fight back when he went out. We began talking about me going to Serbia and then we would tour his Native Hungarian land and he was excited as I was... I began to make all the arrangements and set stuff in order, then my eye needed surgery again and he thought our Visit would not happen, had quit his job there and was going to go to London to work...He said he could make more money there... I asked about my trip and he said we were still on when my eye situation was finished. Then he became irritated again but wouldn't share, And I did finally find out he was having complications with getting his ID? passport renewed, but I knew it was more... had started to revert back not sleeping and Nightmares all the time, I knew I needed to get there ASAP. I remember his birthday on may 5th he turned 19... although I could not be there I was bound to make it memorable for him, I had bought my New computer and decided I would have my Old lap top refurbished( he was using an old hp D760 we called it the Dino) I had  upgraded everything on it and sent it with Cables and Speakers and Even a new LG4 phone, his screen was so cracked I just imagined him with Bandaids on his fingersThe box weighed about 21 lbs full of converters and every thing needed for him .... it was very expensive to ship and even cost  a lot to have it delivered there, but to me it was worth it to give him a grand 19th birthday, I played his Native birthday music and sent him some songs we had enjoyed for hours together... when He said it was just another day I knew no one had spent time to show him his value and worth with "No strings attached" Dennis was a good kid and would give his very last to a stranger... he often thought of others and said he was not important... So untrue I got to know the real Dennis not the one he would try and show... Yes he was a little off but anyone of us would have been Dead already if we were in his shoes....So When a kid is acting up or out maybe  we need to step closer, ask those questions we are afraid to ask help edify and encourage before it's to late....!!!  my Heart is truly broken and heavy The pain will linger at His Death, yes he couldn't take it any longer the screams the agony and terror the teasing  and the disrespect for his culture... he laid down  boldly in front of a train leaving the station to end his alredy numb and disembodied life... I lost a Brother, Friend a child still in the heart but a very very confused one... I am just in tears I could not get to him in time... but then was there ever any time, or was he just biding time... That We will never know... So those who knew Dennis 191 please take a moment in remembering him and now you know more than ever before, I am so glad to have taken the time and spent what was a bonding moment, I am glad to have spent the hundreds of hours on the net  and even video chatted with him, the eyes  don't lie and well they told his life story, and his connection with me ... the challenges we both faced... take a moment to remember him and then think is there someone in my own life I should be more aware, spend more time with, and just love them for who they are... not who we want them to be...!!! Here's to you... you Dennis are not or ever was a mistake you are Loved an always will be loved and now maybe you can truly Rest in Peace...???:heart::kiss::heart::heart:

  3. Drew Espinosa
    Latest Entry

    Howdy y'all! Time for another College Week!

     

    PHYS 2425: This week, my teacher taught us about forces, specifically friction. However, this was also the week that my class had our first exam. And well... I got a C. :,( To be honest, I'm one of the lucky ones, half my class actually failed it.

    MATH 2414: But not everything is doom and gloom. Where last week we learned how to differentiate inverse trigonometric functions, this week, we learned how to integrate them. Again... super fun! :D SPCH 1321: In Speech, I gave my second speech, and I got an A on it! 

    ENGR 1201: In Engineering, we got assigned reading for the weekend. Woohoo. :rolleyes: In all seriousness though, it's only 35 pages, so it ain't a big deal, lol.

     

    Anyways, I have a question for y'all, have you ever done poorly on an exam?

    Well, that's it for this week! 

  4. Comicality
    Latest Entry

    By Comicality,

    Now, while many readers that get truly involved with the stories we write online are mostly involved in the sometimes exaggerated drama of the situations we put our main characters through...I feel that it is often the tension delivered in a few key scenes, sprinkled here and there throughout, that truly captivates a reader's attention and brings them to the edge of their seats. It's this grinding on the nerves, along with a few tugs on the heart strings, that can really allow your audience to lose themselves in your writing and become fully engaged in every word of text in front of them, craving to read more as soon as possible.

     

    If you can pull this off as a writer, then you have developed a very persuasive gift that you can use to carry you through many more stories in the future. Writing is a gift, but the stories you create and the way you build them up have a specific 'science' to them. It's just a matter of learning to apply an instinctual formula to fit the context of your story in a variety of different ways. Tension in a story can make your work unbelievably addictive if done right! Once you learn the literary 'mathematics' of it all, you can write hundreds of new and amazing chapters and change things up enough to avoid becoming repetitive or predictable.

     

    That being said, hehehe...my apologies to any of you who ever lost sleep trying to burn through any of my previously available chapters when you had other, more productive, things that you could have been doing with your evenings instead. It's flattering, believe me. But I hope it's not keeping you from work or school or family or anything else meaningful. That wouldn't be a good thing.

    Before I jump right into it all, let me start by sharing this particular scene with you guys. This is from the 1996 movie, "The Rock". To this day, I still regard this particular few minutes of film to be some of the most intense moments in any movie that I've ever seen before. (There are others, sure. But I didn't want to post anything that might have spoilers involved. If you haven't seen 'Seven' with Brad Pitt and Morgan Freeman? Yeah, the end of that movie is INSANE as well! WATCH IT!!!) When viewing this scene, the tension starts off being pretty 'action movie accurate' from the get go, simply because of the ordeal itself. But notice how, minute by minute, things are elevated to some serious 'Holy SHIT' levels while watching everything unfold! The flawless acting, the motion of the camera angles, the swell of the music in tone and volume, the heated dialogue...soon being shouted at full volume, in what seems to be a no-win situation. To me, this is the perfect example of what creating and escalating tension is all about! Give it a look!

     

     

     

    One thing that I really love about this scene is the fact that the tension is being pulled SO damned tight before a single bullet is fired! It's not the action that creates the tension, but the build up to it. By the time the actual fighting begins, your audience is already wound up and ready to explode! Giving your scene the kind of power that you need it to have to set off the bomb that you've got planned to go off at any moment. Like..."JESUS! Where is this going??? This can't be good!" This is what I like to call 'punchline tension'. It's designed to build up to a major turning point in your story, and the tension created is all about the 'payoff'. VERY effective, because your readers can see it coming, but they hold on, regardless. Listen to the dialogue. It's a chess game, basically. Both the General and the team leader begin by trying to reason with one another and inject a few logical points to get their opponent to consider changing their mind. When that doesn't work, the team leader (Played by Michael Biehn) attempts a different approach by talking to the other soldiers in the room instead. However, the general (Played by Ed Harris), counters by reminding them all of their elevated and advantageous position. This is when people start yelling to force their point home. However, neither side is willing to back down, and once things have reached their most volatile moment...it doesn't take much at all to set acts of extreme violence into motion! When the scene finally drops the hammer on the audience, the impact of it is crazy!!! You almost want to cringe and shout, "NO NO NO!!!! Ahhhh!!! Shit! This is BAD!!! SO BAD!!!" Congrats! You now have yourself a captive audience! Just keep in mind that the build up to a major moment in your story is just as important, if not MORE important, than the moment itself. This is how you lock your readers in. Think of it this way...

     

    If your readers are sleepy and need to get up for work or school the next morning? If they have to go to the bathroom? If they're due to perform open heart surgery in a few minutes...but they choose to finish your recent chapter instead? Then...SUCCESS!!! As it should be!

     

    (By the way...don't EVER delay open heart surgery for a story! LOL! That's IMPORTANT! Jesus, what kind of monster are you? ::Giggles::)

     

    To visualize...tension in your fiction is the ability to place two opposing forces at an equal distance of a line drawn in the sand. At first...they're far enough away to possibly solve their conflict without losing control of the situation. However, as each side takes another step forward, pressure is applied, and things get more intense. They eventually end up in one another's faces, and they keep inching forward until one side or the other eventually crosses the line. And that's when all hell breaks loose.

     

    This particular building tension is all about the eventual payoff. That's the focus. Draw your readers in and keep 'tightening the screws' until they're ready to snap. And then...Boom!

    There are other slight variations on the idea of creating high tension, however. So, while I have your attention, let's touch on the majors.

     

    Another scene that I would like to share with you all is from the 1989 movie, "Aliens"! I wish I had a clip that includes more of the build up to this moment, as I have always felt that it was truly brilliant. But, you know...Youtube! To this day, the sound of that 'Aliens' motion detector thingy creeps me the fuck out! GAH!!! Hehehe! Basically, there are alien creatures that are overrunning this deep space facility, and even though an entire team of well trained, heavily armed, soldiers, have been deployed to handle the situation...it is immediately clear that their enemy has been underestimated, and they find themselves completely overwhelmed by what's going on! The tension, like every other part of the story, has an arc to it. It builds, it reaches its peak, and then shit hits the fan and it's all a roller coaster ride downhill from there. Take a look...

     

    Now, unlike the scene in "The Rock", where all of the tension comes before the big action set piece...THIS scene takes the action and places it, center stage. When writing a hardcore action scene like this, the tension is built through pure chaos, instead of suspense. There's a difference.

     

    What begins as a very quiet, anticipatory, moment...suddenly gets boosted up to level 100 once they realize what's really going on! Figuring out that the 'animals' they expected to outwit are smarter than they seem? That escalates tension. Having a young child now put in harm's way? Escalated even more. Having a 'traitor' in their midst that they can't trust with Burke? Another level of tension. And then, (R.I.P. Bill Paxton) when one of the main characters actually DIES during one of his most heroic, and totally badass, moments in the entire film...well that just shoots the tension through the ROOF! Because it lets the audience know that the stakes are so high that not everybody is guaranteed to make it out of this alive. Beloved main character or not!

     

    Increasing tension rule? Take the plot armor off! TV shows like "Game Of Thrones", "24", and "The Walking Dead", have used this technique to perfection. Yeah...that favorite character that you loved so much? They might not survive this episode! So keep biting your nails until you know they're safe for sure! Give your characters multiple problems to handle all at once! HARD problems! And put a timer on them as an added bonus! They've only got a few seconds to do...'whatever'! Hehehe! It'll be awesome, trust me!

     

    Action scenes like this one demonstrate the value and serious 'gut punch' that tension can deliver to your audience when you need to give your story a powerful boost, and let your readers know that outcomes can be a bit more unpredictable than they think. For heavy action scenes, I find that creating many different levels of uncontrolled chaos works wonders.

     

    There is a scene in "Gone From Daylight", where the main character has gone to save a friend of his from a drug induced stupor on the edge of town...and he finds him, barely conscious, with the love of his life helping him out. As well as two of his friends, who are experts at fighting off enemies. The scene begins with people trying to stop the main character from taking his friend home, and a giant battle ensues. But it's not just that one fight that is the focus of the scene. There's an overwhelming series of events that all begin to take place at once. A dangerous fall, a rickety fire escape, a deadly battle between his best friends and an enemy of great strength, the need to protect his love interest...all of these things are going on simultaneously. With the focus, rapidly, shifting back and forth from one major emergency to another to keep the readers as wild and frantic as the characters in the scene. Putting your readers into the same panic that your main character is going through can also make an exciting scene so tense that they won't be able to look away until they see how it ends! Watch the "Aliens" clip again! See how they bounce and back and forth from one big problem to another. Quickly! Zoom, zoom, zoom! So, for action scenes, use a flurry of different dilemmas in unison, and switch between them to keep the tension party going strong!

     

    So...what if you're not writing some kind of 'punch in the face' action scene in your story?

     

    Well, I believe that all conflict, whether argumentative or displayed through a physical confrontation, is simply a harsh dispute and an even more harsh defense of differing ideologies. That always makes for the BEST conflicts, and the greatest moments of tension in whatever story it is that you're trying to tell. (More on 'Conflict' in a future post, and how it differs from tension, as I explain it here.)

     

    This type of tension is created mostly through dialogue, and may not result in some massive shootout or hand to hand combat scenario...but biting and well delivered dialogue can have the exact same effect if done correctly. As we all know, words can hurt more than any kick or punch delivered physically. Again, the same rules apply. You have two people approaching a line that's been drawn in the sand, and one of them is eventually going to CROSS that line in an attempt to bully their opponent out of their opinion, and give up. This can be accomplished by giving some real thought to how both sides of an argument feel that they're in the right, and are desperately trying to convince someone else to see the light. These kind of conflicts start off as an attempt to reason with the person standing in their way, and tension rises as the different ideologies begin to clash in a frustrating manner. The idea of "WHY can't you see my point of view???" Builds to a crescendo, and...of course...a line is crossed. A writer can do amazing things when their readers can see and possibly sympathize with both points of view. By creating tension in this way, you force readers to tackle the conflict within themselves, and they may not know who to root for right away. Which can only make your story and it's main conflict all the more engaging in the long run.

     

    This scene is taken from season 2 of the Netflix show, "Daredevil"! It displays the clash of ideologies perfectly, in my opinion. You have two men that are, basically, vigilantes. They both work outside of the law in order to bring justice to their city. However, has one of them gone too far in killing the 'scum' that he sees no redemption in? Or is the main character deluded by the 'good' he thinks he's doing, while allowing the crime and the murder to continue? Listen to the conversation they have, how it builds, and see if you can see the point in both sides of the equation?

     

    Now...99% of that entire scene is just a conversation on a rooftop. With two determined characters trying hard to make their point. There's a desire to feel vindicated. They feel that there is something to 'win' by shouting it out. But when neither side seems to be making any leeway with the other, tension builds, and drastic measures have to be taken to end the argument. Because logic and reason isn't working anymore, and the line was crossed when one of the parties has given up on a diplomatic solution. They'll never see eye-to-eye, and attempts to reach any common ground are over and done with. A slight variation of escalating tension, but it still works wonders, depending on the story you want to tell.

     

    Now...ONE more, before I stop blabbing! Hehehe!

     

    This method involves two sides that seem to be equally matched, but when pressure is applied and the heat gets turned up...a great truth is revealed. Creation of tension in this way comes from your audience siding with your protagonist, and truly ENJOYING the badgering and bulldozing of another character until they get the answers they're looking for. This can range from beating a criminal suspect up for information, to a heated courtroom confession...as is brilliantly displayed in the infamous scene below...

     

     

    Now, this might sound a bit weird to you, but it's true. Words in a story have a 'speed' to them! Weird, right? If you want to have a calm, romantic, moment between characters after sex...where they're just laying in bed and enjoying the afterglow? Then make your sentences long, and poetic, and highly descriptive. Draw the out, and capture the nuance and detail of the moment. But...when it comes to tense situations, heated arguments, or immediate threats? Keep it short! The shorter the sentence, the faster your audience will read it. Keep them dodging back and forth from one hyped up scene to another. Like ducking to dodge a bullet fired in their direction. It may sound silly, but it's true. A 'period' in a sentence during a tense scene is like an editor's cut during an action scene in a movie. When action happens, the cuts become quicker. More frantic. They create 'energy'. That's what you want to do with your words.

     

    So shorten your sentences. It helps in creating a feeling of tension. It seems like such a small thing, but it works. People who argue interrupt one another. They SHOUT! They make insults and offensive comments. They say things to regain the upper hand at any cost. The 'back and forth' between characters is a weapon that you have at your disposal when trying to bring the stress and fury that your readers are looking for in the most crucial of moments. Shorter sentences, description, dialogue, creates a faster feeling of momentum in your writing. This is you, turning the volume up on the stereo and making this scene stand out as something to pay attention to.

     

    Just don't drag it out for TOO long! Anxiety can be exhausting. And it gets tiresome if you wait too long to give the audience what it's looking for.

    Anyway, that's my take on creating and escalating tension in your work. As with everything else, it takes time and practice and a lot of 'trial and error'. But once you get it down...it's going to add some spice and flavor to everything you write from that point forward! So consider it a skill that you want to study and keep close to the hip for later use! Cool?

    As always, I hope these little self-learned lessons over the years will help you guys out in some way! Good luck! And I'll seezya soon!

     

  5. Cia
    Latest Entry

    By Cia,

    TGIF! Yes, yes, it's Friday! Prompt Day! Thanks to Comicfan, we have many more for you to enjoy. What sort of selections do we have for you this week? Well, it's nothing so interesting as what's for dinner. Oh man, do I hate getting that question at the end of a long day when I have NO idea so sometimes my answers can be a tad... interesting, lol. Did you write a flash piece with some interesting answers as well? 


    Prompt 700 – Creative

    Tag – School

    You’ve just taken a class at the local university as a way to better yourself and get ahead in  your career. However, when the professor walks in you realize you might have taken the wrong class. Who is the professor and what are they teaching?

     

    Prompt 701 – Creative

    Tag – Curse

    Before you born, your mother pissed off the local witch. The witch went beyond a normal spell and a curse was laid upon her unborn child, which is you. The curse keeps you silent, ugly, obedient, and can only be broken if the meanest person in the town kisses you, and begs you to speak. If it happens you will regain your speech, the looks you should have had, and be free to make up your own mind and follow others demands.


     

    Did you flash for us? *gasp* Post it below! 

  6. Graeme
    Latest Entry

    By Graeme,

    Thank you to everyone who has suggested themes for next year's anthologies. We're now able to start the process of voting for which themes we'll be using. This will be a two step process, with the first step being to reduce the number of selections to a managable number for the final round of voting.

     

    Step 1

    I have created a thread (see link below) in the Private Anthology forum for all authors and poets to vote on which of the suggested themes they believe they could write something. Feel free to pick as many themes as you like, as what we're doing to trying to identify the themes that will inspire the most people.

     

    Step 2

    Once we have a short list of themes that members have indicated they could write to, we'll have a second round of voting to narrow that short list down to the final four themes.

     

    Dates

    The first round of voting is now open. The poll will automatically close on 29th September. That gives everyone just over a couple of weeks to vote for what themes they find inspiring.

     

    Once we have the short list of themes, the second round of voting will commence shortly afterwards, with the voting closing (and the anthology themes for next year being identified) in the second half of October.

     

    Okay, that's it for now. Please review the list of anthology theme suggestions and let us know which ones you think you could use. Don't worry too much just yet about which ones you like -- we'll do that in the second round of voting.

  7. wildone
    Latest Entry

    By wildone,

    Well I'm currently freezing to death with close to 0 C or 32 F weather in mid September :( . But that is nothing to what our members in the Carolina's and Georgia as well as our many members in the Philippines are going through. Here's hoping you are all safe and secure through these trying times :hug:

     

    Shall we take a look at what happened over the past week?

     

    Monday, Cia brought us a Story Review. i even heard that the author, K.C. is lurking around the site again :)

     

    Tuesday was big, as in a very detailed update from Myr on Tech Tuesday about Series and the new option; Worlds:

     

    Wednesday we had a Birthday Party 🎂! Who's you ask? GA is 16 years old :yes: I shall apply for a drivers license for GA this week.

     

    Thursday, Graeme brought us the next step in voting for next years Anthology Themes. If you are an Poet or Author, make sure you get your vote in today!

     

    Friday, Cia launched another round of Writing Prompts from Comicfan:

     

    Saturday we had another great Gay Author Article from Comicality. This one has left me feeling... tense :gikkle:

     

     

    Anthologies

    • 2018 Fall Anthology: Fight Back - Due Nov 15th
    • 2018 Fall Anthology: Good Intentions - Due Nov 15th

     

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    ***Check out this GA Classic***

     

    Sorry Mom

    by Duncan Ryder

     

    When you find your future, you shouldn’t have to give up your past.

     

     

    Don't forget.... Read, Write, and REVIEW!!!

  8. Needless to say, my life is one big fuck up right now. Everything seems to be going to the shits. Well, not everything. Two significant parts of my life remain on track. My reading is prodigious right now. I am actively reading: Call Me By Your Name by André Aciman, Lords and Ladies by Terry Pratchett, The Seventh Cross by Anna Seghers, Hiroshima by John Hersey, Blood’s a Rover by Harlan Ellison, and most of The New Yorker when it comes to the house most weeks. Yeah, you’re asking how do I keep track of it all. Well, I do, somehow. The other thing going on correctly right now is my next story. It had a working title of The Reluctant Father up until yesterday when I changed it to Canes. I working on Chapter 8 right now. It is a psycho-sexual family drama about a sixty-something gay widower and a young gay teen who has an unhealthy relationship with railroad locomotives. It’s not so much that they go fast, but exactly what happens if you’re standing in front of one when it’s going 50 mph.

     

    So, what’s going on with the rest of my live? Well, you see we have this thirteen week old German Shepherd puppy that—although she belongs to my son—is my responsibility during the day because he works swing shift, comes home and stays up until three or four in the morning, doesn’t get up until one or one-thirty in the afternoon, and he leaves for work at two-fifteen so he can get to work an hour early so he can read the newspaper.

     

    Then yesterday afternoon when he got up to eat his breakfast, his regular bowl was dirty because he’d used it for a snack the previous night, so, he got a bowl out of the cupboard. Now, these bowls are not cereal bowls; they’re more dessert sized, which means he has to keep the box of cereal and the jug of milk on the table so he can have a sizeable breakfast.

     

    “Why didn’t you wash your bowl?” I asked foolishly.

     

    “Oh, you know, I don’t do service work anymore. The house nigger should’ve cleaned it before I got up.”

     

    Yeah, that’s his nickname for me.

     

    The house nigger does the dishes, sweeps the floors, does the grocery shopping, and raises his mastuh’s dogs.

     

    Plus, my knees are giving out on me, but the VA orthopedic surgeons won’t send me outside to get artificial knees because I weigh too much. I think I need to lose about another ten pounds. My bad knees are forcing me to decide whether I’m going to give up the idea of leaning how to play the guitar because I have to drive 27 miles to my lessons every Saturday. I know you’re thinking, “Oh, the poor old man has to drive TWENTY-SEVEN MILES and back for his guitar lessons. Well, if it’s all that far, maybe, he should give up his dream. Poor old man.”

     

    Well, fuck, I drive down there and back and not surprisingly it takes me six days to recover (yeah, six days means I miss that day’s lesson) because unlike most people, I don’t have any cartilage in my knees. It’s all melted away and has been replaced with arthritis, but my orthopedic surgeon says I gotta walk to keep that synovial fluid sloshing around in there to cushion what I have left of my knees. If I don’t, then just maybe I won’t be able to walk at all. I’ll be lucky if they issue me one of those walkers with handle bars, a seat, and hand brakes. Worse? Well, I don’t want to think of worse because when the surgeon told me about what worse entails, I figured I’d better get out there and walk some more even if it makes my knees feel like dried dog shit on a hardwood floor.

     

    And, of course, there’s the head or, rather, its contents, that collection of gray and white matter which is supposed to keep me on an even keel, but doesn’t. Sure, I take meds, I’ve been taking meds since April, 2008. But, now, I’ve been released by my local VA shrink and sent out to a vendor. An example of this vendor’s expertise in mental health meds is she prescribed Amantadine for my Essential Tremor. It’s a mild Parkinson’s drug given for tremor from that disorder, but one of its rather insidious side effects is narcolepsy. If I take that, I’ll be subjecting myself to my personal “My Own Private Idaho.” Just think of it, no more tremors, but going to sleep in a school zone and wiping out a street crossing full of first graders. Not my idea of fun. They do recommend not driving or operating heavy equipment if you take it. So, I’m not going to be taking that med. When she asks how I doing on it, I’ll let her know about the narcolepsy side effect. Probably, the worst thing about that side effect is that not only can it occur when you first start taking the med, but it can crop up years away. I wonder how many old people who’ve been given that drug and fall asleep while driving down the street and take out a sidewalk full of kids on their way to get Slurpees. It certainly won’t be me.

     

    But, speaking of mental health, I’m in a general funk right now. Yesterday, I was ready to pack my bags and books and take a powder. I don’t know where I would’ve gone. Probably, a city where there is a VA Med Center where I could get treatment for my various ailments. And, of course, although I would’ve left a note, I wouldn’t say where I was going and I certainly would never come back. No, this house nigger was going to be a runaway and I wouldn’t give a fuck about whether my son could remember how to wash dishes.

     

    Today? Well, today I listened to all of my Vangelis CDs and typed this blog, which dumped a whole lot of shit on you guys. I apologize, but you see I don’t have anyone else to dump on because my VA shrink won’t talk to me and my vendor shrink only speaks to veterans on Thursday’s. So, thank you for listening and sorry for the “N” word, but when you’re called it, it kind of sticks to you in not a very nice way.

     

    Better go, time to feed the dogs or mastuh be mad.

     

  9. This week I'd like to talk about two of the new features coming to the site soon.  I've shared this a bit with the authors, but I wanted to share them a little wider.  This is a more focused view for readers.

    We currently have one way for authors to group their stories: Series links.  They work, but I've wanted them to be more obvious.  So, with the new version, we're giving a bit more depth to our Series.

    image.png

    Series now has a description.  We can also add a series banner and special enhanced displays for series that have special circumstances.  Authors should take note of the red Xs on the side.  We can now very easily remove stories from a series (and yes, it asks to confirm the delete, so no accidents) or reorder the stories by simply pressing the up and down arrows.

     

    But a series of stories isn't the only way to group stories in the next update.  As anyone who has ever read Tom Clancy, Mercedes Lackey, J.K. Rowling, or Rick Riodan knows, you can have a whole bunch of different series featuring different aspects or couples that all take place, along with stand-alone stories, in the same world.  And hence, the next new feature: Worlds.

     

    image.png

     

    Worlds function almost exactly like Series, except that there is no order like in a series and you can add Series to your world.  For the sharp-eyed readers here, you will spot "Contributors".  For the purpose of this demonstration, I added dkstories' Dreams of Humanity Series to my Psionic Corp world.  Series listing also allows contributors, though I didn't show it in the example above.   Also in the picture, you can see that Series has one highlight color (black currently) and Worlds another (Violet, currently).  Also, Dreams is tagged with Premium, so that is also listed.  I see this feature getting used for authors who share the same writing world or for authors like @Comicalityand I who write stand-alone stories that share the same area.   In the example, you see two of my Anthology entries which are stand-alone entries in my Psionic Corp world. 

     

    Good news too, current existing stories in a series will import in as is.  The Author or staff members will just need to go and add a description to the series page, and it'll be good.  (if one isn't added, it'll just look as it does now)

    image.png

     

    The browse menu will now have a "Browse by Series" and "Browse by Worlds", as you can see in the right-side menu in the above image.

     

    image.png

    There are other things coming as well.  But as you can see from the screenshots, the test server already has these features working :D

  10.  

     Dear Alzheimer’s, 

     

    You’re just a dirty sneak thief.  You sneak in and steal from people. You don’t even have the courage to announce yourself.  Your nasty cousin, cancer, at least starts with a cough or a pain. But not you, oh no.  

     

    You waltzed in, and started taking things. Little things. Things you didn’t think would be noticed; like where the car keys had gone, or the reading glasses. “Everybody remember where we parked!” became a family joke. 

     

    You started taking bigger things.  Like conversation. Gone were the days when we talked about so many things over coffee.  Now there were questions asked, and answered, and asked again. Trains of thought, derailed before they even left the station.   

     

    But now, everyone notices.  Stolen glances behind backs, eyes rolling like teenagers at hearing the question, again. And, occasionally, “Oh wait, I asked that already, didn’t I?” "You know, I'm just not worth a damn some days." She knows now, that something is missing. But you’re sneaky, she’s not quite sure what’s going on.  

     

    And while this is cruel, what is worse is that the past is now crystal clear.  Phone calls and emails to grandchildren to apologize for things that happened 13 years ago.  Knowing for certain, with absolute clarity, what she wore to that Halloween party 40 years ago.  

     

    You’re getting bolder now.  Walking, moving, becomes difficult.  You’ve stolen our walks. When we would wander the neighborhood, the park, even the mall.  The shuffling gait leads to trips, trips to falls, falls to fear, and fear, to inaction. 

     

    We ask, “What’s next?” There’s a caregiver now.  You’ve taken her ability to feed herself, and care for herself.  She’s like a small child again needing help with daily activities like brushing her teeth, and even going to the bathroom.  Unmarked boxes, full of “incontinence supplies” start showing up with the mail. Like a small child, she lashes out in anger, and frustration.  She knows things are missing. 

     

    If that wasn’t enough, you’ve taken her spirit, the very thing that made her, who she is, or was.  She lays on the bed, not knowing anyone, or anything.  There isn’t even any fighting. We know she’s gone, only her body doesn’t realize it yet.  We mourn, but we can’t fully, as we try to care for what you’ve left behind. 

     

    You’ve taken so much.  Will you ever be satisfied? 

     

    Sincerely, 

     

    molly

     

     

    We all have fears.  When i was a teen, and into my early twenties i lived in a part of the US that has high rates for MS, Multiple Sclerosis.  It was my boogeyman. Now, three people i know, two of which i went to high school with, are battling it. It doesn’t frighten me anymore. 

     

    The area i grew up in has been labeled a “cancer cluster."  Talking with classmates from high school, we’re losing parents and each other to cancer and other chronic illnesses.  i deal with this daily, it’s no longer a fear. 

     

    But Alzheimer’s.  That’s fecking scary.  My Grandmother had it; her sister had it; my mother has it; my sister's mother in law has it.  My aunt lost her husband to it last year. We’d been saying goodbye to him for three or four years 

     

    Losing ME, that’s scary. So scary that it can make me cry.   

     

    This month in the US starts a series of "Walk to End Alzheimer's" events.  You'll see commercials for it, hear stories on the news programs, they'll say that "the first survivor of Alzheimer's is out there." If you are so inclined, get a team together, volunteer at one of the events, or find a way to sponsor someone who's walking.  For more information on the Walks check here
     

     

     

    As always, my thanks to tim, @Mikiesboy, for helping me find the courage to do this in the first place xoxo

    And tonight, to AC, @AC Benus, thank you for looking at this for me xoxo

  11. This morning I woke up, pretended to eat the imaginary ice cream (green flavour!) that Goblinboy pretended to feed me, got up and fetched Baby Wolfeater from his cot, gave them milk, and went back to bed to snuggle my husband. Dashi joined us, because the best place for a lurcher to be is cuddled on our duvet, and after a little while we were invaded by our small and not so small sons. Then I got up.

     

    It's Sunday, so I abandoned my husband with the small boys, and Dashi and I went to the farm. Many people have told me I'm a lucky bastard, and trust me when I say that I believe them. Our great friends Clare and Christian have rented us (back in April) a little scrap of unused woodland with a pond in it (about an acre all in all, but not all useable) in return for one pig per year - ready for the freezer. So we built a fence (cue swearing, shouting, bleeding) and now we have pigs, six chickens in a run we got for free (score!), a greenhouses we have yet to rebuild (secondhand for nothing), a shed containing the very beginnings of a rabbit tree (meat rabbits, don't get all sappy on me), and a raised bed growing potatoes.

     

    I fed the animals, walked to Copper's field and gave him breakfast, and went for a walk with Dashi and the farm spaniels. It was a good morning.

     

    Then I came home to be greeted by all my boys.

     

    Goblinboy will be three (THREE? where did the time go?) at the end of October, and Wolfeater has just turned one. Goblinboy is all about the talking, playing pretend, the questions (Why is rain?), the learning about hammers and anvils (he's learning from his Daddy. I'm proud), and the helping with absolutely everything (anyone need a tiny gardener?). Wolfeater is walking (properly walking) and has been able to climb the stairs since six months (yeah, we've had no rest), and is busy eating whatever he can lay his hands on and trying out new word-sounds.

     

    And.... now neither of them are napping anymore, and I gotta go.

     

    Oh, and I wrote something. Kitt's been great at keeping my secrets as always. Bye y'all!

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    Recent Entries

    Superpride
    Latest Entry

    Listed below are the story cards and the ending card that you will use to create ideas for a story that you will then write down as a response to this entry.  More details are in the description of the blog.  Enjoy!

     

    Story Cards

    Child (Character)

    This Can Fly (Aspect)

    Cave (Place)

    Fire (Thing)

    Ring (Thing)

     

    Ending Card

    So the rightful ruler was placed on the throne once more.

  12. Dear G A

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    quokka
    Latest Entry

    Dear GA

    I know it has been a while, I have been in a state of nothingness this past week.

    i have just started writing again, and although I am still taking it easy, I have managed to complete another two chapters of an un finished story, which I am sure my followers will be pleased about.

    life seems to be sliding by at a rate that I can sometimes not keep track of, with me having to check my mobile phone, to see what day it is.

    i sometimes wonder what the hell have I done during my life, and the truth is stuff all really, which doesn't help with my moods.

    well that is all for now.

    Preston

  13. quokka
    Latest Entry

    More chapters coming...

    sorry about the delay..

    Q

  14. Carlos Hazday
    Latest Entry

    By Carlos Hazday,

    My thanks to the two members who sent in multiple questions for a variety of authors following my last appeal. I’ve been pestering the authors since and I’ll be sharing their responses over the next couple of blog entries. This month we have a couple of returning ones and a couple of rookies. In alphabetical order…

     

    Gay Author’s Poetry Sensei, @AC Benus, returns with a short question and answer.

    You’ve been posting lots of older work which is great.  Will we see something ‘now’ from you?

    • • •

    I am working through and posting my old poems, but I also post new stuff all the time, like the Sonnets for Tony. Mojo is also rolling out, and that's entirely new :)

    • • • • •

     

    @lmoline is a sophisticated, intelligent woman with outstanding literary taste. How do I know this? Simple, she’s a fan of my stories and I look forward to seeing her react to each chapter I post in the CJ series. Fine, that was a plug, so sue me. What some of you may not know is she’s also a poet. I Started Thinkingher initial post a little over a year agois a moving exploration of how our life doesn’t always follow the path we thought it would.

    You’ve written a few poems. They seem very personal. Does poetry help you deal with situations in your life?

    • • •

    To answer your question, yes when I write it is my form of therapy. It allows me to release all of my pent up emotions. I can say that each poem I have written or have posted has been personal to me in some way, whether it is from early experiences in my life to current situations. I do hope to post a few more soon and I appreciate the encouragement I have received.

    • • • • •

     

    Can an author produce both complex and simple writings? @Mikiesboy can. In prose and poetry. His work can be delightful in its flights of fancy; it can also be moving, rooted in personal experience. Based on my interactions with him, his writing reflects his personality: a serious individual who has a surprising child-like playfulness at times.

    Your book about a couple dealing with disability suddenly introduced into their lives was highly successful. What inspired you to begin writing the sequel to "Changes"? Did you just feel the timing was right? 

    • • •

    What inspired the character Don, who is a doer, an athlete, a marathoner, a sports writer, very alpha, a top, who, in an instant, has all he thought he was taken from him, came from a line in a story I read when I was around 13 or 14.

     

    I cannot remember the name of the book or the exact quote but it was something akin to, "And mountain goats fall too." That stuck with me. Mountain goats we think of as sure-footed, sturdy, yet even they can slip and fall.

     

    The book was about a man who wanted to kill himself after finding himself in a wheelchair because he couldn't bear to live that way. I always wondered about that.

     

    I wondered why some people cannot find what they need to continue to live in the face of huge change. Where do they find the strength to give up the only life they have?  Also, what is it within us that keeps us fighting in the face of huge change or issues. Why not just give up?

     

    So, I wrote Changes. It's really Don and Louis' story, and all the others in their lives. Because when a family member has a life altering accident, it affects everyone.

     

    And so, with that bit of background, the answer to the question is twofold. Usually, when I write characters and finish a story, I am done with them, but that didn't happen in this case. These two still had more to offer to me as a storyteller.

     

    The second part of the answer is, it is droughtquake's fault. He said something to me about writing more about Don and Louis, and what he thought that might look like. I let his idea stew awhile. So after a couple of false starts, I am writing Changes Again.

     

    Thanks for the question.

    • • • • •

     

    The final author highlighted this month is also the newest addition to the GA stable in this group. @Superpride posted for the first time a few months ago; his six storiesfive of them still in processhave supernatural and romance themes. If those topics appeal to you, make sure to check out his work.

    You seem to have a fascination for more other-worldly type stories. Where does this come from?

    • • •

    First, I want to say that I'm very grateful that you're asking me this question since I love interacting with people who are interested in my stories.  With that said, I think my fascination for more other-worldly type stories comes from my other fascination with mythologies and folklores from different cultures, especially from the Philippines where my parents have come from and is a major influence to a couple of my stories published on this site.  There is so much that we can learn about these stories, and that is one reason why I write my type of stories, to share my own fascination with these old stories by adding my own twist to them.  This includes Filipino mythology that has fairies called diwata who can change ginger into gold and vampire-like creatures called the aswang who can separate their bodies into two, independent segments while they hunt during the night.  I think another reason why I write these types of stories is because I love exploring certain concepts like people having superhuman abilities to defend humanity from an other-worldly threat and use them as analogies for today's real-world problems.  In today's world that is very divided in many aspects, I want to tell stories that can be used to help us to better understand these issues while entertaining us as well by using these futuristic and fantastical themes that is my form of escapism.  There is something about telling stories about superheroes, fairies and mermaids and having them relate to the past, present and even future that is very fascinating to me as well.  I hope this answers your question, and I'm looking forward to interacting with anybody else in the future.

    • • • • •

     

    That’s it for this edition, my friends. Tune in next month for more insight into authors you love and those you have yet to discover. In the meantime, remember to send me any questions you may be dying to ask but may feel too shy to do in person. I promise to protect your identity. :P

  15. A few years ago I was fat and out of shape. I got tired of it and decided to do something about it. 

     

    Over several years I went to the gym 3 or 4 times a week. I didn't do anybody's insanity workout. I studied and talked to some people and came up with plans that would work for me. 

     

    Sometimes I missed. Sometimes things came up and just didn't have time. I was sick on occasion but, more often than not, I went. 

     

    I went down from 300 to 240- over time. I haven't looked or felt this good in years.

     

    Fast forward to February of this year- I discovered that my older brother has bone marrow cancer and needs a stem cell transplant to have any chance at remission or a cure. 

     

    The hospital he went to, SCCA(1), immediatly began screening me as a donor. They didn't like my age. People over 40 don't produce as many stem cells. They tested me and found me to be a 10 point match.

     

    Earlier this month I flew out to Seattle and underwent the physical from hell where I discovered: 1) I'm healthy  2) I'm not just healthy but in the top 10% for men my age bracket healthy 3) My cardiovascular health was such that I could be a donor.

     

    I know WHY I decided to get in shape. It was something I did for myself. It turned out to be about more than just me. 

     

    That fat guy from 3 years ago- he wouldn't have made the cut. 

     

     

    _________________________

    1- Seattle Cancer Care Alliance

  16.  

    Greetings acolytes!

     

    Sorry, sorry. I was rereading a Mercedes Lackey book and saw the add for her fan club. And yeah, excuse the brief moment of imagining I have one of those and needed something to call my fans. I blanked on how to start this post after I wrote the title. Mid-afternoon caffeine on an empty stomach. 

     

    Ahem.

     

    Since March, I've been striving to post chapters monthly for my story Predators: 2-14-9X

     

    March saw chapter 1 (Imagine Magazine March 2018) GA thereafter) April 2 , May 3, June 4, and then, well...

     

    Life.

     

    We've all got one, and I don't think I need go on.

     

    If that sounds like an excuse, (it does), let it slide, please. Things will go better for everybody. Hehe.

     

    Believe me, I know the feeling upon reachING the end of a chapter or book. That craving for more. The  almost frustration that there's not more, NOW. Sure, nobody is posting comments on my work about it, nobody is emailing me about it. Doesn't matter. I am more bothered than anyone that I'm behind schedule. Nobody wants the rest of the story posted more than I do.

     

    Which is exactly why the aberration.

     

    Back in one of the original binge writing sessions I was blazing a trail through the jungle of creativity through chapter 4 with chapter 5 in sight. Everything was going so well a problem was inevitable. And the final scene of chapter 4 proved it be it.

     

    I knew exactly what would happen. I had the vivid anime in my head. But it's one thing to watch an anime of TV. You're on the outside looking in. Suddenly zooming in on a character and hearing an f internal monologue isn't jarring. But suddenly trying that after 3 4/5 chapters of filtering everything from Aiden's point of view? *Buzzer* No. Fail. You shall not pass. *Stadium crowd boo*

    And yet, without the author's benefit of seeing Peter's train of thought as the game goes on how was it to make sense? How do I smoothly relate something to the reader that the actual narrator in doesn't notice? How does Peter's behavior look specifically through the lens of Aiden? How does the carnival game? The lessons? The practice?

     

    If you have read through Chapter 4.5, you know that I figured something out.

     

    But back in the beginning, I was totally lost. Rather than kill all my momentum and become bogged down in the puzzle I simply roughed out a bullet list of what would happen with no point of view or context to it. I moved on. Chapter after chapter the story moved forward. I remembered the problem, came back to it. But I stayed stuck.

     

    Life happened and writing slowed down. Time marched on and suddenly it was coming up on the deadline for chapter 4. I looked hard at pacing and word count. I missed my deadline, but I was making progress. I decided that Chapter 4 could end on a good place without the final scene. Polished it  Posted it. Escaped the pressure (of my own making) and got back to work.

    Hard work, no small inspiration, and even one writing session at work on a slow day, and I finished the missing piece.

     

    Yay! Awesome! *stadium crowd cheer*

     

    When the typeface settled, it was long enough, good enough, to be a chapter by itself. But I wasn't willing to give up on the chapter number road map in my head or gloss over what happened.

    And so, Chapter 4.5.

     

    And now you know the .5 of it all.

     

    (Incidentally, any editors like the story and willing to help out?  My listed editor is on hiatus. And the more I try to balance moving forward and cleaning up behind me with life, the further I'm falling behind.)

     

    Thank you for reading.

     

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    Me: Hey! Hi ! Hello ! How are you ? Can we be friends ? 

               I am so like that! it is so funny that I am so hopeful that I can find my true love. True love that I can’t see , it’s like I am blind or that “true love” is so far to see . I am now 18 ! and that existence I didn’t have a relationship yet! I have so many crushes and sadly none of them like me? Am I ugly? “ looking at the mirror” Me: No , my friends and other says I’m cute . 

    Am I super girly? 

    Me: No

    Am I sweet ? 

    Me: sometimes 

               Maybe months have passed, I started chatting on many guys online, I found out that I am inlove to guys who is older than me, like some of my batch mates are for crush and for day dreaming  only. I am a joker in class, I make the whole class laugh ! What’s wrong with me? Why like there are no guys wants me? “urghhhh” . 

    Everyday and night I didn’t stop to add guys , text them , or call them if I am so upset that no one really want me. Maybe some says they have their “bf” “hubby” “honey “ “mine” or “my boo” etc. Some says they are not yet ready. Some says they want to see me real and meet me. And like “ hooooo” you know what is the reason why ? I look for that ideal man! “No” I mean the man who can love me truly, accept me, care for me, and willing to visit me here in country. The main reason why I don’t have any bf right now because I am looking for a foreign guy or some guys from other country. Look how many guys I added on Facebook, followed on Instagram, and etc. Like maybe there are only 4-5 persons last for a month in chat. They say that love is hard when you are in different country , “ yeah , I know “ but we can be if we will do something which will make us strong.  

    One time I said to myself I should wait, until one time,  I was about to sleep and I am still scrolling who is onlins, and I saw a message request coming from  a guy in London, not so cute but he has that look. Like he is so sweet and weeks after  chatting, he is now saying that he loves me! OMG! and I really don’t that he is 25 !!! but then I should say that I am so lucky ! I expect so much , and this is it, I said my “YES” and we are both so happy after. After 2 weeks he said that he has plans for me, so sometimes he is busy on his work and he is hardly working. Before our monthsary maybe 4 days before , I was like waiting to him to get online, and then my text is became like an essay! he is not replying or even say 

    Good morning, or even a thumbs up”  . 🙄 Is this real? like at first he really loves me , and he always say those excuse that he is so busy. So after 4 days is our Monthsary, like I am the one who greet him and made a long sweet message. Then the only reply he said was “ thank you”  Whaaaatttt??? I am a kind person so I understand him. 

                2nd Month , like sometimes we do video call and we are like laughing while he is walking to go to his work, then he’s like making me happy.  After  weeks, is our second Monthsary and like he greet me, then I said “ I love you” and like I am so blushing all day when I think of him. I suggested to him that he must have an haircut because he has long hair , then he said that soon! After all these days, he was like a smoke like gone for a week, then he is calling me like he is drunk, like his face was so haggard and stressed, so I really worry about him, you know what’s worse that he said to me that “ You may leave” like I don’t understand him that night.  So we ended the video call incompletely and I am worried . Early in the morning I open my inbox from Messenger he was apologizing , and like I forgive him. That’s me easy to forgive and very kind.  

                                      To be Continued.

  17. Valkyrie
    Latest Entry

    On August 9, 2013 I decided to take the plunge and join GA as a member instead of reading stories as a lurker.  While I'd dabbled a bit with writing poetry and some creative fiction, I'd never actually finished anything I started writing.  The closest I came was a vampire novel I started writing in the early '90s (which I may yet finish ;) )  The atmosphere on GA was so welcoming.  It felt like a place where I wanted to interact with others, and one of my favorite things was reading the weekly prompts.  There was more participation in the prompts back then, and I felt like they were a good way to ease back into writing.  Bolstered by the positive and encouraging responses to those early scribblings, I expanded one of them into my first novella. I then decided to tackle the anthologies, which helped me develop my writing skills even more.  I was beyond thrilled to be promoted to Promising Author, and then Signature.  I still feel a flash of pride whenever I see the maroon rectangle next to my name.  :) 

     

    Writing and GA has opened so many doors for me.  I love writing and sharing my work with like-minded people.  My editing/beta team have become dear, dear friends. @Cole Matthews, @Lisa, @aditus... I can't imagine a life without you all in it :hug:  There are too many to name, but know everyone on this site holds a special place in my heart.  It's hard to believe it's been five years since I de-cloaked and became a member.  Yes, I'm a Star Trek nerd :gikkle: 

     

    Many of you know I have been spending the summer re-doing my house.  I bought new appliances, a new recliner, a giant cat tree, and a boatload of other new things for the house.  My mom and I moved every piece of furniture, scrubbed the walls and floors, and went through every box downstairs.  I threw out a ton of stuff, donated a ton of stuff, and now have a manageable living space.  There are a few reasons we did all this.  One, it needed to be done.  I've done a lot of travelling in the ten years I've lived here, so I let a lot of house stuff go.  Two, I had my BFF planning to visit for a week and I wanted a house that didn't look like it was inhabited by trolls. And three... I am having major surgery this week.  

     

    This has been a summer of reflection for me.  I found a lot of things from my past when going through all those boxes.  Mostly good memories, but some bittersweet.  I don't want to get into all the details of my surgery, since it's rather personal, but I will say I have a pre-cancerous condition which requires the removal of some parts.  The risk of cancer is relatively low, but still there.  I've had two prior surgeries, and admit to being most nervous about this one.  So I will be away from the site briefly while I recover.  I'm hoping my absence will be less than a week, but it all depends on how I feel and what they find.  I won't have my laptop with me until I'm back home, but I will have my cell phone and will keep Cole updated.  He has my permission to post updates here.  

     

    I am hoping to do a lot of writing while I recover.  I'd like to finish "The Hollow Hills" and start my next novel.  I have some editing to do, and something exciting in the works for GA.  I also hope to be able to do some reading... something I've been neglecting lately.  

     

    So that's what going on in my life right now.  Thank you to all my readers, followers, and friends. You guys are awesome :hug: :kiss: 

  18. MrM
    Latest Entry

    5Xi6DfT.jpg

     

     

    Track List

    1. Closed Doors (Message To Bears) - Overture: Taryn Inside Looking Out
    2. For Adrian (Many Years Ago) (Mark Tulk) - Taryn’s Song
    3. Darkest Dreaming (David Sylvian) - Taryn’s Dreams of Escape
    4. Shattered Dreams (Johnny Hates Jazz) - The Last Straw
    5. Shake Dog Shake (The Cure) - A Fateful Decision
    6. Leave In Silence (Depeche Mode) - Stealing Away Into The Night
    7. Dirty Blvd. (Lou Reed) - Taryn and Alec on the Cold Streets of Chicago
    8. To The Ends Of The Earth (The Unfinished) - Homeless and Hungry
    9. If Only Tonight We Could Sleep (The Cure) - Survival: Failing
    10. Letting Go (Wild Nothing) - Realities and Realizations
    11. You Found Me (The Fray) - When Comes The Beautiful Stranger
    12. Indigo Eyes (Peter Murphy) - Trevor
    13. Cry Little Sister (Marilyn Manson) - Discovering The Sleeping Undead
    14. The Hopeless (Velvet Acid Christ) - Alec Is Sick
    15. After The Fall (Chelsea Wolfe) - From Bad To Worse
    16. Lost Little Boys (Fatherson) - It Just Isn’t Working
    17. God Bless The Child (Annie Lennox) - Taryn’s Choice
    18. Abandoned (Antarctic Wastelands) - A Promise Never Kept
    19. Age Of Consent (Arcade Fire) - Taryn Consents
    20. Darkness (Disturbed) - Taryn’s Last Day
    21. When Love And Death Embrace (HIM) - Taryn: Gone From Daylight
    22. Dark Shores - The Anchor By The Lake
    23. Forever Young (OneDirection) - A Light In The Darkness
    24. Ocean Eyes (American Avenue) - Justin Time
    25. A Time For Us (André Rieu) - Love Found In The Darkness

    ————————————

    Closed Doors (Message To Bears) - Taryn Inside Looking Out

     

    Instrumental Overture

     

    For Adrian (Many Years Ago) (Mark Tulk) - Taryn’s Song

     

    Many years ago

    When only boy

    So many years ago

     

    Many years ago

    At the age of eight

    So many years ago

     

    Many years ago

    You took me aside

    To a darkened room

    Closed the door

     

    On a moonless night

    The curtains were drawn

    I wanted to run

    But I didn’t know why

     

    Many years ago

    When only boy

    So many years ago

     

    Many years ago

    At the age of eight

    So many years ago

     

    You took my hand

    As you loosened your belt

    I started to shake

    I didn’t know why

     

    You held me down

    With your Policeman’s hands

    And ordered me not

    To make any sound

     

    Many years ago (X4)

     

    Many years ago

    You took me aside

    To a darkened room

    And closed the door

     

    On a moonless night

    The curtains were drawn

    I wanted to run

    But I didn’t know why

     

    Many years ago

    As I was starting to gag

    So many years ago

     

    Many years ago

    At the age of eight

    So many years ago

     

    You let go of my hand

    And tightened your belt

    I fumbled for the door

    I tried not to cry

     

    The light of the hall

    It blinded my eyes

    I swallowed the words

    You planted inside

     

    “Tell Mommy or Daddy and I’ll take them away.” (X)

     

    Darkest Dreaming (David Sylvian) - Taryn’s Dreams of Escape

     

    Stay tonight

    We'll watch the full moon rising

    Hold on tight

    The sky is breaking

     

    I don't ever want to be alone

    With all my darkest dreaming

     

    Hold me close

    The sky is breaking

     

    I don't ever want to be alone

    With all my darkest dreaming

     

    Hold me close

    The sky is breaking

     

    Shattered Dreams (Johnny Hates Jazz) - The Last Straw

     

    So much for your promises

    They died the day you let me go

    Caught up in a web of lies

    But it was just too late to know

     

    I thought it was you

    Who would stand by my side

    And now you've given me, given me

    Nothing but shattered dreams, shattered dreams

    Feel like I could run away, run away

    From this empty heart

     

    You said you'd die for me,

    Woke up to reality

    And found the future not so bright

    I dreamt the impossible

    That maybe things could work out right

     

    I thought it was you

    Who would do me no wrong

    But now you've given me, given me

    Nothing but shattered dreams, shattered dreams

    Feel like I could run away, run away

    From this empty heart

     

    You've given me, given me

    Nothing but shattered dreams, shattered dreams

    Feel like I could run away, run away

     

    From this empty heart

    From this empty heart

     

    I thought it was you who said they'd die for love

     

    And now you've given me, given me

    Nothing but shattered dreams, shattered dreams

    Feel like I could run away, run away

    From this empty heart

     

    You've given me, given me

    Nothing but shattered dreams, shattered dreams

    Feel like I could run away, run away

    From this empty heart

     

    Oh no no no you said you'd die for me

    Oh oh die for me

    So much for your promises

     

    Shake Dog Shake (The Cure) - A Fateful Decision

     

    Ha ha ha

    Wake up in the dark

    The after-taste of anger in the back of my mouth

    Spit it on the wall

    And cough some more

    And scrape my skin with razor blades

    And make up in the new blood

    And try to look so good

    Follow me

    Make up in the new blood

    And follow me to where the real fun is

     

    Ha ha ha

    As stale and selfish as a sick dog

    Spurning sex like an animal of god

    I'll tear your red hair by the roots

    And hold you blazing

    Hold you cherished in the dead electric light

    Your face

    I'll never see you this way again

    I captured it so perfectly

    As if I knew you'd disappear away

     

    Shake shake shake shake

    Shake shake shake shake

    Shake dog shake

    Shake shake shake shake

    Shake shake shake shake

    Shake dog shake

     

    You hit me again

    You howl and hit me again

    The same sharp pain

    Wakes me in the dark

    And cuts me from my throat to my pounding heart

     

    My heart

    My shaking heart

    My howl my shake dog

    Oh shake dog shake

    Shake shake

    Shake dog shake

     

    But we slept all night in the virgin's bed

    And dreamed of death

    And breathed like sick dogs

    We slept all night in the virgin's bed

    And breathed like death

    And dreamed of sick dogs

     

    Shake shake

    Shake dog shake

    Wake up wake up wake up

    Shake dog shake

    Wake up wake up wake up

     

    Shake dog shake

    Wake up in the new blood

    Make up in the new blood

    Shake up in the new blood

    And follow me to where the real fun is

    Shake dog shake

     

    Leave In Silence (Depeche Mode) - Stealing Away Into The Night

     

    I've told myself so many times before

    But this time I think I mean it for sure

    We have reached a full stop

    Nothing's gonna save us from the big drop

    Reached our natural conclusion

    Outlived the illusion

    I hate being in these situations

    That call for diplomatic relations

    If I only knew the answer

    Or I thought we had a chance

    Or I could stop this

     

    I would stop this thing from spreading like a cancer

    What can I say? (I don't want to play) anymore

    What can I say? I'm heading for the door

    I can't stand this emotional violence

     

    Leave in silence

     

    We've been running around in circles all year

    Doing this and that and getting nowhere

    This'll be the last time

    (I think I said that last time)

    If I only had a potion,

    Some magical lotion

    That could stop this, I would stop this

     

    I would set the wheels in motion

    What can I say? (I don't want to play) anymore

    What can I say? I'm heading for the door

    I can't stand this emotional violence

     

    Leave in silence

     

    Dirty Blvd. (Lou Reed) - Taryn and Alec on the Cold Streets of Chicago

     

    Pedro lives out of the Wilshire Hotel

    he looks out a window without glass

    The walls are made of cardboard, newspapers on his feet

    his father beats him 'cause he's too tired to beg

     

    He's got 9 brothers and sisters

    they're brought up on their knees

    it's hard to run when a coat hanger beats you on the thighs

    Pedro dreams of being older and killing the old man

    but that's a slim chance he's going to the boulevard

     

    He's going to end up, on the dirty boulevard

    he's going out, to the dirty boulevard

    He's going down, to the dirty boulevard

     

    This room cost 2, 000 dollars a month

    you can believe it man it's true

    somewhere a landlord's laughing till he wets his pants

    No one here dreams of being a doctor or a lawyer or anything

    they dream of dealing on the dirty boulevard

     

    Give me your hungry, your tired your poor I'll piss on 'em

    that's what the Statue of Bigotry says

    Your poor huddled masses, let's club 'em to death

    and get it over with and just dump 'em on the boulevard

     

    Get to end up, on the dirty boulevard

    going out, to the dirty boulevard

    He's going down, on the dirty boulevard

    going out

     

    Outside it's a bright night

    there's an opera at Lincoln Center

    movie stars arrive by limousine

    The klieg lights shoot up over the skyline of Manhattan

    but the lights are out on the Mean Streets

     

    A small kid stands by the Lincoln Tunnel

    he's selling plastic roses for a buck

    The traffic's backed up to 39th street

    the TV whores are calling the cops out for a suck

     

    And back at the Wilshire, Pedro sits there dreaming

    he's found a book on magic in a garbage can

    He looks at the pictures and stares at the cracked ceiling

    "At the count of 3" he says, "I hope I can disappear”

     

    And fly fly away, from this dirty boulevard

    I want to fly, from dirty boulevard

    I want to fly, from dirty boulevard

    I want to fly-fly-fly-fly, from dirty boulevard

    I want to fly away

    I want to fly

    Fly, fly away

    I want to fly

    Fly-fly away (Fly a-)

    fly-fly-fly (-way, ooohhh...)

    Fly-fly away (I want to fly-fly away)

    fly away (I want to fly, wow-woh, no, fly away)

     

    To The Ends Of The Earth (The Unfinished) - Homeless and Hungry

     

    A Desperate Instrumental

     

    If Only Tonight We Could Sleep (The Cure) - Survival: Failing

     

    If only tonight we could sleep

    In a bed made of flowers

    If only tonight we could fall

    In a deathless spell

    If only tonight we could slide

    Into deep black water

     

    And breathe

    And breathe

     

    Then an angel would come

    With burning eyes like stars

    And bury us deep

    In his velvet arms

    And the rain would cry

    As our faces slipped away

    And the rain would cry

     

    Don't let it end

     

    Letting Go (Wild Nothing) - Realities and Realizations

     

    [Verse 1]

    It's getting hard for me to reframe all those shifting memories

    Like a music box that never starts dancing by itself

    What a broken world, what a broken world

    It is my only wish to see you, to see through you

    I step inside

     

    [Chorus]

    Letting go

    I want to be happier now

    I want to be more than closed

    Surreal, the way you made me out

    The way you crashed me down

     

    [Verse 2]

    It's getting hard for me to remember all of the names from my life

    You've been so many different kinds of people in my mind

     

    [Chorus]

    Letting go

    I want to be happier now

    I want to be more than closed

    Surreal, the way you made me out

    Letting go

    I want to be happier now

    I want to be more than closed

    Surreal, the way you made me out

    The way you crashed me down

     

    [Instrumental Bridge]

     

    [Chorus]

    Letting go

    I want to be happier now

    I want to be more than closed

    Surreal, the way you made me out

    Letting go

    I want to be happier now

    I want to be more than closed

    Surreal, the way you made me out

    The way you crashed me down

     

    You Found Me (The Fray) - When Comes The Beautiful Stranger

     

    I found God on the corner of First in Amistad

    Where the west was all but won

    All alone

    Smoking his last cigarette

    I said where you been?

    He said, ask anything

     

    Where were you

    When everything was falling apart?

    All my days

    Spent by the telephone

    That never rang

    And all I needed was a call

    That never came

    From the corner of First and Amistad

     

    Lost and insecure

    You found me, you found me

    Lying on the floor

    Surrounded, surrounded

    Why'd you have to wait?

    Where were you, where were you?

     

    Just a little late

    You found me, you found me

    In the end

    Everyone ends up alone

    Losing her

    The only one who's ever known

    Who I am, who I'm not, and who I wanna be

    No way to know

    How long she will be next to me

     

    Lost and insecure

    You found me, you found me

    Lying on the floor

    Surrounded, surrounded

    Why'd you have to wait?

    Where were you, where were you?

     

    Just a little late

    You found me, you found me

    Early morning

    City breaks

    I've been calling

    For years and years and years and years

    And you never left me no messages

    You never send me no letters

    You got some kind of nerve

    Taking all I want

     

    Lost and insecure

    You found me, you found me

    Lying on the floor

    Where were you? Where were you?

    Lost and insecure

    You found me, you found me

    Lying on the floor

    Surrounded, surrounded

    Why'd you have to wait?

    Where were you, where were you?

     

    Just a little late

    You found me, you found me

    Why'd you have to wait

    To find me?

    To find me?

     

    Indigo Eyes (Peter Murphy) - Trevor

     

    Fire burning in a hill

    The lines are rocky rough

    Red angels wait to pick remains

    The cindered shoulder

    Of confused men

    Separate from their awe

    With grey desire

    He looks out mad

    His soft grey indigo eyes

    Indigo eyes...

    Asking

     

    His heaven is uncovered not

    A black tree blocks his way

    His way is skating round a dome

    (His way is in dismay)

    The playmate sings

    Like Orpheus in some thunder world

    Asking to be bathed in light

    To be exemplified

     

    With grey desire he looks out mad

    His soft grey indigo eyes

     

    Saw his past

    He had dug for trust

    With blind infected hands

    And wondered as the hurt bit hard

    Why the sacred weren't at hand

    Only when his ears were deaf

    To the angels light burst waves

    Only when his ears were deaf

    Did life turn from fog to fog

    But not evil but estranged

    But not evil but estranged

     

    Indigo eyes, Indigo eyes

    Indigo eyes, Indigo eyes

     

    With grey desire

    He looks out mad

    His soft grey

    Indigo eyes

    Indigo eyes

     

    Cry Little Sister (Marilyn Manson) - Discovering The Sleeping Undead

     

    [Verse 1]

    Last fire will rise behind those eyes

    Black house will rock, blind boys don't lie

    Immortal fear, that voice so clear

    Through broken walls, that scream I hear

     

    [Chorus]

    Cry, little sister (Thou shall not fall)

    Come, come to your brother (Thou shall not die)

    Unchain me, sister (Thou shall not fear)

    Love is with your brother (Thou shall not kill)

     

    [Verse 2]

    Blue masquerade, strangers look on

    When will they learn this loneliness?

    Temptation heat beats like a drum

    Deep in your veins, I will not lie

     

    [Chorus]

    Little sister (Thou shall not fall)

    Come, come to your brother (Thou shall not die)

    Unchain me, sister (Thou shall not fear)

    Love is with your brother (Thou shall not kill)

     

    [Bridge]

    My Shangri-La, I can't forget

    Why you were mine, I need you now

     

    Cry, little sister

    Come, come to your brother

    Unchain me, sister

    Love is with your brother

     

    [Chorus]

    Cry, little sister (Thou shall not fall)

    Love is with your brother (Thou shall not die)

    Unchain me, sister (Thou shall not fear)

    Love, love is with your brother (Thou shall not kill)

     

    Cry, little sister (Thou shall not fall)

    Love is with your brother (Thou shall not die)

    Unchain me, sister (Thou shall not fear)

    Love is with your brother (Thou shall not kill)

     

    The Hopeless (Velvet Acid Christ) - Alec Is Sick

     

    A force fed lie, our dead dream

    Awake upon a staircase

    Start looking downward into Hell

     

    Where the last life screamed and we screeched

    "We're always, always a bloody mess, a bloody mess"

    Lying hole, tired eyes, you're screeching

    You're scraping the bone with your life

     

    Into a dream, we will fade

    Hopeless, the hopeless, the hopeless, the hopeless

    The hopeless, the hopeless, the hopeless

    They're calling of the dead, calling of the dead

     

    You liars, and your face

    And your eyes separate the fear, the lies, the fate

    Set into eyes, the calling of the dead

    Image in the light, they calling you dead

     

    They won't believe signs, they don't believe your cries

    They always open eyes, and the light all over your head, your head

    Time distortion, crawling onto your knees

    Crawl onto the floor, get off your feet

     

    A lie in the wake, spiralling down

    Glass feeling moments all over your arms, over your arms

    Condemned, force fed, force fed, you're calling dead

     

    Feeling your flesh ripped apart with Heaven and Hell

    The conflict of everything was sent from Heaven and Hell

    The conflict of disease, the life-long breeding season

     

    For your lips, you'll take away the life that was given so easily

    Now all becomes the entity of hate, shows you hate

    Shows you light, shows you everything. everything

    The fading light, a broken dream

    You're everything, your everything

     

    Kneel to the floor, get off your knees

    Raise up to the light, you won't feel a thing

    Inject the needle, inject the time

    Kill all the light with forces of the night

     

    Always a lost day, always a hopeless brain

    Always everything, always force fed

    Into your head, into head, into your life

    Where you dream, that's where you go

     

    That's how it lives, that's how you know pain

    No choice, no life, no choice, no freedom

    Just separation, segregation, the annihilation

    Annihilation, annihilation, annihilation

     

    After The Fall (Chelsea Wolfe) - From Bad To Worse

     

    Nothing will keep us apart

    I said nothing will keep us apart

    I know that you'll find me there

     

    I know that you'll find me

    After the fall

    I know that you're waiting

    I know that you'll find me there

     

    After the fall

    I know that you're waiting

    Ready to run

     

    Chasing the sun

    I can't wake up

    Scream and run

    Don't let them win

     

    Nothing will keep us apart

     

    I know that you'll find me

    After the fall

    I know that you're waiting

    I know that you'll find me there

     

    After the fall

    I know that you're waiting

    Ready to run

     

    Chasing the sun

    I can't wake up

    Scream and run

    Don't let them win

     

    Nothing will keep us apart

     

    Go on, drive into the morning

    Never give up

    Never give in

     

    Lost Little Boys (Fatherson) - It Just Isn’t Working

     

    [Verse 1]

    It's a cold summers night

    Are you beside me? I can't tell

    I need your help

    I need it honestly

    I can't stand up right these days

    But you owe me that

    Yeah, you owe me that

     

    [Chorus 1]

    Cause we're just lost little boys

    Making a name for ourselves

     

    [Verse 2]

    It's a cold summers night

    Are you beside me, in good health?

    I need your help

    I need it honestly

    I can't stand up right these days

    But you owe me that

    Yeah, you owe me that

     

    [Chorus 2]

    Cause we're just lost little boys

    Making a name for ourselves

    And we're just lost little boys

    Making such fools of ourselves

     

    [Bridge]

    I'm not one for second chances, I'm just lost

    If I'd stopped then I really would be giving up now

    But I'm not one for second chances

    I've never been one for second chances

    And I'm not one for second chances

    I've never been one for second chances

     

    [Chorus 3]

    Cause we're just lost little boys

    Making a name for ourselves

    And we're just lost litle boys

    Making a name for ourselves

    And we're just lost little boys

    Making such fools of ourselves

     

    God Bless The Child (Annie Lennox) - Taryn’s Choice

     

    Them that's got shall have

    Them that's not shall lose

    So the Bible said and it still is news

    Mama may have, Papa may have

    But God bless the child that's got his own, that's got his own

     

    Yes, the strong gets more

    While the weak ones fade

    Empty pockets don't ever make the grade

    Mama may have, Papa may have

    But God bless the child that's got his own, that's got his own

     

    Money, you've got lots of friends

    They're crowding around your door

    But when you're gone and spending ends

    They don't come no more

    Rich relations give crust of bread and such

    You can help yourself, but don't take too much

    Mama may have, Papa may have

    But God bless the child that's got his own, that's got his own

     

    Money you've got lots of friends

    They're crowding around your door

    But when you're gone and spending ends

    They don't come no more

    Rich relations give crust of bread and such

    You can help yourself, but don't take too much

    Mama may have, Papa may have

    But God bless the child that's got his own, that's got his own

     

    Here just don't worry about nothing cause he's got his own

    Yes, he's got his own

     

    Abandoned (Antarctic Wastelands) - A Promise Never Kept

     

    A cold adagio for the lost.

     

    Age Of Consent (Arcade Fire) - Taryn Consents

     

    Won't you please let me go

    These words lie inside they hurt me so

    And I'm not the kind that likes to tell you

    Just what I want to do

    I'm not the kind that needs to tell you

    Just what you want me to

     

    I saw you this morning

    I thought that you might like to know

    I received your message in full a few days ago

    I understood every word that it said

    And now that I've actually heard it

    You're going to regret

     

    And I'm not the kind that likes to tell you

    Just what you want me to

    You're not the kind that needs to tell me

    About the birds and the bees

     

    Do you find this happens all the time

    Crucial point one day becomes a crime

    And I'm not the kind that likes to tell you

    Just what I want to do

    I'm not the kind that needs to tell you

     

    I've lost you [x5]

    I've lost you [x5]

    I've lost you [x5]

     

    Darkness (Disturbed) - Taryn’s Last Day

     

    Don't turn away

    I pray you've heard

    The words I've spoken

    Dare to believe

    Over one last time

    Then I'll let the

     

    Darkness cover me

    Deny everything

    Slowly walk away

    To breathe again

    On my own

     

    Carry me away

    I need your strength

    To get me through this

    Dare to believe

    Over one last time

    Then I'll let the

     

    Darkness cover me

    Deny everything

    Slowly walk away

    To breathe again

    On my own

    On my own

    On my own

    On my own

    On my own

     

    Dare to believe

    Over one last time

    Then I'll let the

     

    Darkness cover me

    Deny everything

    Slowly walk away

    To breathe again

    On my own

    On my own

     

    When Love And Death Embrace (HIM) - Taryn: Gone From Daylight

     

    I'm in love with you

    And it's crushing my heart

    All I want is you

    To take me into your arms

    When love and death embrace

     

    I love you

    And you're crushing my heart

    I need you

    Please take me into your arms

     

    When love and death embrace

    When love and death embrace

    When love and death embrace

     

    Oh oh ohhh

    When love and death embrace

    Oh oh when love and death embrace

     

    Oh oh

    When love and death embrace

     

    When love and death

    When love and death

    When love and death embrace

     

    Oh When love and death embrace

    Oh When love and death embrace

    Oh When love and death embrace

    Oh When love and death embrace

     

    Dark Shores (Stand Of Oaks) - The Anchor By The Lake

     

    Minerals formed by the rain

    Whispers echo deep inside the cave

    On an ice moon where all our fathers’ live

    We’ll go there to find some rest

    I spent most of my life

    Wandering in the wasted hours

    I spent most of my life

    Wandering in the wasted hours

    Storm clouds gather around our heads

    Black birds circle waiting to be fed

    I’ll build a house on these dark shores

    Past lives won’t bother anymore

    They won’t find me here

    (I spent most of my life, wandering in the wasted hours)

     

    Forever Young (OneDirection) - A Light In The Darkness

     

    Let's dance in style, let's dance for a while

    Heaven can wait, we're only watching the skies

    Hoping for the best but expecting the worst

    Are you gonna drop the bomb or not?

     

    Let us die young or let us live forever

    We don't have the power but we never say never

    Sitting in a sandpit, life is a short trip

    The music's for the sad men

     

    Can you imagine when this race is won

    Turn our golden faces into the sun

    Praising our leaders, we're getting in tune

    The music's played by the mad men

     

    Forever young, I want to be forever young

    Do you really want to live forever, forever and ever?

    Forever young, I want to be forever young

    Do you really want to live forever? Forever young

     

    Some are like water, some are like the heat

    Some are a melody and some are the beat

    Sooner or later, they all will be gone

    Why don't they stay young?

     

    It's so hard to get old without a cause

    I don't want to perish like a fading horse

    Youth's like diamonds in the sun

    And diamonds are forever

     

    So many adventures couldn't happen today

    So many songs we forgot to play

    So many dreams swinging out of the blue

    We let them come true

     

    Forever young, I want to be forever young

    Do you really want to live forever, forever and ever?

    Forever young, I want to be forever young

    Do you really want to live forever, forever and ever?

     

    Forever young, I want to be forever young

    Do you really want to live forever?

     

    Ocean Eyes (American Avenue) - Justin Time

     

    (Reprise from ‘Gone From Daylight’)

     

    Time For Us (André Rieu) - Love Found In The Darkness

     

    Instrumental Reprise of Taryn and Justin’s Love Theme

  19. This has been on my mind off and on for a while. There are writers of all stripes and there is an entire spectrum of ways to offer criticism and a matching spectrum of ways to deal with receiving criticism. Probably the first one many writers get has to do with punctuation. I remember well the first time someone said 'neat story, but you need an editor.' My first thought? Screw you! Which I guess brings me to my first point - being polite.

     

    Every single work of mine has issues and I know it. Every time I re-read something, I find something new. I'm often amazed at the number of eyes that go over a story and something still slips by. I'm convinced there are typo gremlins that adjust files before posting. Being told 'You need an editor' may be very true, but kind of rotten to say on its own. As time has passed I may ask if the author has thought of using beta readers or editors because I find my work improves so much with the extra input.

     

    Next, though more subjective, is the substance of a story. Given I write gay fiction there is a good chance that the characters I write about most will get together. This doesn't surprise folks. As someone I just exchanged messages with pointed out, it's more about the journey. That journey can have a lot of things happen between the first and last page and, for me, this is where beta readers come in. For me a good beta reader points out things (hey, he was Steve three lines ago, now you're calling him Simon) that you may have missed or changed by accident. I write along, looking at my keyboard as I go (don't judge!) and I have the scene playing out in my head and try to transfer it to the screen before I forget something. Like having another person in the room I didn't name or something that sort of ruins the whole thing.

     

    So with a beta reader, I try to knock down some of the criticism that would occur when reading something, especially items an alert reader might read and have them get jerked right out of the story. That also brings me to editors, which fill that role in my head of telling you where that comma ought to go instead of where you put it. No, not there.

     

    I had an editor who I shall not mention here because I'm going to try and get her to edit for me again, one day. But in my earlier work I'd write something like: "Says something," He coughed. If you're scratching your head, it's been pounded into me since that action, like the cough, is punctuated differently than 'he said'. To whit: "Says something." He coughed vs. "Said something," he said, and coughed. If your editor is pointing out the same mistake over and over, you may lose your editor if you don't at least make an effort to get better at fixing your own work. As a reader, especially with the lessons I've gotten from my editors, bad spelling or grammar will take away from my enjoying the story.

     

    That brings me to 'Look past that and just see the great story in there!' No. I'm sorry, it really doesn't (normally) work that way. Think of the last great movie you saw. Do you have any idea how much it could have been mangled by a poor editor? Or better still, the credit that film editor deserves for getting that great movie experience to you? It works very similarly in writing. If things are poorly punctuated it can change the meaning of sentences or paragraphs, leave you wondering who was speaking or acting in a given situation as a couple of for instances. This also brings me to the idea of listening to others. Not to the point you change who you are or your style, perhaps, but one of the great things that comes from a large writing community is the ideas people present. If you, as a writer, say 'I took a writing class and they said what you're saying is wrong' then you're kind of locking yourself in. There are tons of writing styles and no one, single right way exists for all people (except spelling and punctuation, folks) so be open to the ideas even if, ultimately, you don't use them.

     

    So that kind of brings us to - when do I critique something? That's a toughie. If I offer my thoughts, I choose to do it privately. Not because I know better, but because they are impressions. Recently someone said something to me that I can agree with, and I paraphrase - if you post online, you're asking for feedback. Good, bad or in-between. I love reading comments - especially speculation, but one comment sticks out for me:

     

    Well, I knew this was coming. I knew deep down Sean was just an asshole that was using Asher. Say what u will, but that's the truth. I think that Sean deserves way worse than just an STD. The fact that Asher forgave him was heartbreaking. To think that Asher thinks a lowlife piece of shit like Sean is all he can get. He deserves so much more. The end with he and Asher back together was pretty disappointing.

     

    As a writer, I loved the passion. Also as the writer, I was disappointed with myself because I didn't get the message across of who the character was and hadn't made him someone the reader could identify with. Not all readers can identify with a character, it's just not possible, yet that's the goal, isn't it?

     

    So, when do we critique? I think errors, feedback about confusing paragraphs should be done in private. If you're going to critique the whole thing, might be good to have some sort of rapport with the author (I break this one and never learn). If you see a spot where the story could have gone two ways, get on the message board. Start a discussion. No matter how many roads an author has envisioned, he can't see every possibility. Maybe what you say gets stored and used at a later date. A critique is like a good chat, a nice discussion over tea or coffee or beer. It's not personal.

  20. I wrote this article for Reddit just for the hell of it.

    ***

    Someone posted earlier about the annoying amount of over-development and suburban sprawl in Delaware. I thought it would be interesting to go a little bit over the reasons why the system is set up like the way it is, and how the forces of suburbanization have made Delaware into the bedroom community it is today.

     

    Wilmington developed at a steady pace throughout the 1800's- especially during the Civil War, which the du Pont Company really flourished as at the time they were known for gun powder. In 1864, a horse railcar line was developed around Delaware Avenue, which allowed for Wilmington residential development to expand out towards the "country", and leafy residential neighborhoods began to sprout. Note that this would be a continuing pattern for Wilmington's elite- building pretty "country" houses and pushing north of Wilmington.

     

    Soon, the railroad came, as well as the trolley car. This allowed for Wilmington's first official suburb, Elsmere, which was developed in 1886 by Joshua Heald for working middle-class families. Though there were talks for Wilmington annexing Elsmere into their city boundaries, Elsmere had incorporated as its own town by 1909. Wilmington couldn't really do much about it, because they had a weak city charter and New Castle County government would thwart them time after time whenever they tried to expand their borders.

     

    World War I and World War II brought continued prosperity to Wilmington, which reached 112k in population by 1940. Again, given that Wilmington had a weak city charter that made it hard for them to annex surrounding land into their city, a lot of residential development began to spill out of the borders of Wilmington, which was made even easier by the car. It was around this time that the prosperous North Wilmington suburbs were developed, originally for the du Pont company chemists and their families. (Think Alapocas, Greenville, Talleyville, etc.)

    Meanwhile, the more solidly middle-class suburban development continued out from Elsemere along the newly built Kirkwood Highway. Newark, which had been a relatively small town throughout most of its history, also exploded in population, going from just 6k people in 1950 to over 20k by 1970. The first wave of suburban sprawl began to hit the Newark area as areas such as Brookside were developed.

     

    As the 1950's continued and gave way to the 1960's, suburban development and flight from Wilmington continued. There are a couple of factors for this. The first is that the building of I-95 required demolition of several city neighborhoods, which destabilized the entire area and also made it even easier for people who worked in Wilmington to commute from the suburbs. The second is that the G.I. Bill, which returning WWII vets were using to buy homes, strongly favored new construction in the suburbs as opposed to the older housing stock. Third, the returning G.I.'s and their wives would give birth to what is known as the Baby Boomer Generation. This cohort was so large that entire children-consumer industries sprang up. These G.I.'s preferred to raise their kids in their suburbs, continuing the suburban flight from Wilmington. Finally, the perception of Wilmington being unsafe stemmed from the Wilmington riots of 1968, which led to most of suburban Delaware turning their backs on Wilmington and never looking back. From the 1950's through the 1980's, Wilmington's population would drop from 95k in 1950, down to about 70k by 1990, which is more or less where the population has stabilized.

     

    In the late 1970's, Christiana Mall began to be developed, which drove more development. The success of that mall meant that developers have clamored to build retail in the areas surrounding the mall since, hoping to capture that success as well- you see that today with the new Christiana Fashion Center. The building of nearby Christiana Hospital in 1984-1985 would also be a major driver of development in that region. Another biggie would be MBNA, which was founded in 1982 and became a massive behomoth of a suburban office complex in Ogletown.

     

    Ah, yes, we can't forget about banks, which began a boom in Delaware in the 1980's due to laws passed in 1981 that were favorable to banks. This did in fact led to a lot of office development in Wilmington, but the Baby Boomer bankers preferred living in the suburbs to living in the city. I mean, there were some city neighborhoods that got revived (think 40 Acres/Trolley Square) but by and large the affluence that was being driven by the banking boom of the 80's/90's was going out into the suburbs instead of being invested into the city. At least, beyond the gleaming office towers.

    The next round of suburban development (the 1980's-1990's) would take place around the Bear/Glasgow area. Originally cheap farmland (this area was big on horses), it became known for townhomes and cookie cutter housing developments. On the more upscale side, the affluent developments around Hockessin began to pop up as well. Both of these areas were not incorporated, which meant that developers did not need to go through city laws/city councils in order to get their developments approved- just having to deal with the city. I grew up in Bear during the 2000's, and I remember my jaw dropping when someone told me that Bear had largely been the "country" back in the 80's. You can still see some remnants of its past (I remember seeing some horse farms close to Old Porter Road) but man.

     

    Anyway, another really, really huge factor in the suburban sprawl deal in Delaware comes up in the 1990's. That would be the construction of Route 1. Originally built to bypass Route 13 and create a faster route to the beach, this would help the MOT area (Middletown, Odessa, Townsend) explode in population, as it was now a more convenient area to commute from. Middletown had 3k people in 1990, now it's up to over 20k, and that's just within the city limits. One difference in the suburban sprawl story of Middletown is that the mayor of the 1990's actually set this in motion on purpose, because Middletown was a dying farming town. The town began to aggressively annex surrounding areas so they would benefit from the building of the housing developments and strip malls. This would led to Middletown's population growing by 206 percent between 2000 to 2010. Not that there hasn't been some pushback- in 1999 Middletown residents rejected a school referendum purely as an attempt to stop the suburban development, but of course, it didn't really work.

     

    Route 1 has been a major driver of suburban development all across the state for the past 20 years. I lived in Dover from 2005-2006, and I remember there was a lot of suburbs getting built around the former farmland. Downstate also saw a lot of this growth, particularly with the beach areas, although that growth hasn't extended out to the western part of Sussex County.

    One thing that began to happen, especially during that 2000's real estate boom, is that developers in New Castle County started talking about "re-developing" golf courses, nature preserves, and former office complexes, particularly in the more crowded part above the canal. One particularly nasty fight occurred when the Stoltz Company wanted to build a 13-story tower in Greenville at the former Barley Mill Office complex, and basically the residents banded together to sue them 'til kingdom come until those plans were dropped. Another really controversial move has been talk abut re-developing the Newark Country Club, which has been bandied about for at least the past 15 years but it keeps getting thwarted. I also remember there were some whispers about developing in Bellevue Park around this area, although I don't know if that came to fruition.

     

    The Great Recession did put a damper for a while for suburban development in Delaware. Development has come back, but if you notice, a lot of what's getting built currently are townhomes aimed at seniors as well as apartment buildings. (Notably, the Newark student apartment buildings that everyone likes to bitch about.) You're not seeing as many plans for McMansion developments the way you would have back in the 90's and the 2000's.

     

    Anyways...

    1.) Delaware has always been a really convenient place to travel through when it comes to go to Philly, D.C./Baltimore, or New York City. This convenience has only increased with the building of roads like I-95 and Route 1. (Probably the new 301 is really going to jumpstart some new suburban sprawl as well.)

    2.) Delaware has historically stayed away from compact urban development. Newark was originally a sleepy town that had a small college. Dover was small town until the 1970's. A lot of Delaware was rural for most of our history. (Still shocked at the thought of Bear being a sleepy little farming community as recently as the 80's.) Our only "big" city is Wilmington, and even when they had 100k residents, they weren't building tall apartment buildings- note the row-homes and townhomes.

    3.) Developers like building on flat, open spaces, which Delaware had/has a lot of because we had so many farms. And we are largely on the Atlantic Coastal plain.

    4.) Wilmington lost 40k people in the course of about 50 years, and been unable to entice people to come back. One interesting fact- in 1940, Wilmington had 112k people. Delaware itself only had 266k people. That means that over 40 percent of the entire state of Delaware lived in Wilmington in 1940. Now that percentage is down to about 7 percent!

    5.) Government, especially in New Castle County, has a really, really hard time saying no to developers. There's also this mindset of not thinking ahead. I've learned in the Memories of Newark group that in the 1960's, the Newark City Council was floating the idea of building a by-pass that would have gone around the Main Street area. Sort of similar to what's going on right now with the 301, which is going to by-pass the current 301 that goes through Middletown. It was floated because at the time, Newark was booming, and the traffic problems we see today started to appear. However, the city council voted it down because they thought it was unnecessary. Today, the proposed bypass would be impossible because most of that land got developed, so Newarkers today basically have to pay for the mistakes that were made 50 years ago. And you see similar stories to that again and again- developers getting their way and our government not making them put in the infrastructure needed because they don't want to lose the development deals.

     

    So yeah, there you have it. It's basically almost inevitable that Delaware basically is the way it is. We're basically just reaping what Elsmere sowed back in the early 1900's when they refused to become part of Wilmington because they didn't want to pay city taxes.

    TL;DR: Delaware's life as a suburban bedroom community is the result of forces that were set in motion as early as the 19th century.

    Edited...looks like people want some sources so here's a couple:

    "Corporate Capital- Wilmington in the 20th Century" by Carol Hoffecker, Temple University Press, 1983.

    Wilmington DE population

    Newark DE Population

    Dover DE Historical Population

    Delaware population figures

    Middletown DE Wikpedia Page

    Save Our County- Website for the group that fought the Stoltz Company tooth and nail over the proposed Greenville development

    Push for country park on former orphanage site remains strong, Newark Post Online 2017

    West Main Street Residents Want By-pass, Newark Post Achives September 2,1994

    Christiana Fashion Center's first phase on target, Delaware Business Times March 2015

    Northern Delaware's Christiana Mall remains resistant to retail's rough patch, BisNow 2018

    Banking Haven- Washington Post 1983

    Middletown, Delaware Annexing Farmland- New York Times 1990

    Market Street Renaissance- Out & About, October 2015

    Developers Target Delaware Golf Courses January 2016

    ***

    Growing up as suburban kid...I wouldn't have it any other way. I fucking LOVED hanging out at the mall growing up. I don't know if I would have liked being a city kid, or being in some small cow town or something.

  21. DQDk556.jpg

     

     

    TRACK LISTING

    1. Computer Game (Yellow Magic Orchestra) - The Arcade
    2. High Score Summer (Arcade High) - Matt Meets Sam
    3. Digital Love (Daft Punk) - “Why Don’t You Play The Game?”
    4. Ready To Start (Arcade Fire) - Matt Levels Up
    5. Slow (Kylie Minogue) - The Body Game, No Batteries Required
    6. Boom, Boom (Let’s Go Back To My Room) (Paul Lekakis) -  Scoring Tyler
    7. No ‘I’ In Threesome (Interpol) - Matt + Sam + Tyler = Mamler
    8. Moments In Love (Art Of Noise) - Manage A Toir
    9. Behind The Mask (Yellow Magic Orchestra) - Taking On ‘The Green Monster’ Game Boss
    10. Goodbye (FM-84) - The Threesome Breaks Up
    11. Innocence (Electric Youth) - Suddenly Becoming Too Old For Games
    12. Send Me An Angel (Groovecatcher Cover Of Real Life) - Tyler Meets Ariel
    13. Young & Unafraid - Robert DeLong Mix (The Moth & The Flame) - The Courage True Love Brings
    14. 21st Century Digital Boy (Bad Religion) - Matt Gets His Game Back On
    15. Why Did I Say Goodbye (Tommy ‘86) - Sam Comes Back To Play
    16. Look Into My Eyes (Arcade High) - Sam Meets Matt Again For The First Time
    17. Put Your Money On Me (Arcade Fire) - Matt Learns To Bet And Win
    18. The Comeback Kid (The Midnight) - Matt Comes Back
    19. Running To You (Arcade High) - Sam and Matt, Playmates Forever
    20. Arcade Summer (FM-84) - ‘The Sun Still Shines Bright On Our Arcade Summer’

    ————————————

    Computer Game (Yellow Magic Orchestra) - The Arcade

     

    Electronic Overture

     

    High Score Summer (Arcade High) - Matt Meets Sam

     

    Electronic Tenderness

     

    Digital Love (Daft Punk) - “Why Don’t You Play The Game?”

     

    [Verse 1]

    Last night I had a dream about you

    In this dream, I'm dancing right beside you

    And it looked like everyone was having fun

    The kind of feeling I've waited so long

     

    [Verse 2]

    Don't stop, come a little closer
    As we jam, the rhythm gets stronger
    There's nothing wrong with just a little little fun
    We were dancing all night long

    The time is right to put my arms around you
    You're feeling right, you wrap your arms around too
    But suddenly I feel the shining sun
    Before I knew it, this dream was all gone

     

    [Verse 3]

    Ooh, I don't know what to do

    About this dream and you

    I wish this dream comes true

    Ooh, I don't know what to do
    About this dream and you
    We'll make this dream come true

     

    [Interlude]

     

    [Outro]

    Why don't you play the game?
    Why don't you play the game?

     

    Ready To Start (Arcade Fire) - Matt Levels Up

     

    Businessmen drink my blood

    Like the kids in art school said they would

    And I guess I'll just begin again

    You say you, can we still be friends

     

    If I was scared

    I would

    And if I was bored

    You know I would

    And if I was yours

    Well I'm not

     

    All the kids have always known

    That the emperor wears no clothes

    But to bow to down to them anyway

    Is better than being alone

     

    If I was scared

    I would

    And if I was bored

    You know I would

    And if I was yours

    But I'm not

     

    Now you're knocking at my door

    Saying please come out against tonight

    But I would rather be alone

    Than pretend I feel alright

     

    If the businessmen drink my blood

    Like the kids in art school said they would

    Then I guess I'll just begin again

    You say you can still be friends

     

    If I was scared

    I would

    And if I was pure

    You know I would

    And if I was yours

    But I'm not

    Now I'm ready to start

    If I was scared

    I would

     

    And if I was pure

    You know I would

    And if I was yours

    But I'm not

     

    Now I'm ready to start

    Now I'm ready to start

     

    I would rather be wrong

    Than live in the shadows of your song

    My mind is open wide

     

    And now I'm ready to start

    Now I'm ready to start

     

    My mind is open wide

    And now I'm ready to start

    Your mind surely opened the door

    To step out into the dark

     

    Now I'm ready

     

    Slow (Kylie Minogue) - The Body Game, No Batteries Required

        

    Knew you'd be here tonight

    So I put my best dress on

    Boy I was so right

    Our eyes connected

    Now nothin's how it used to be

    No second guesses

    Trackin' on this feelin'

    Pull focus close up you and me

    Nobody's leavin'

     

    Got me affected

    Spun me one eighty degrees

    So electric

     

    Slow down and dance with me, yeah, slow

    Skip a beat and move with my body, yeah, slow

    Come on and dance with me, yeah, slow

    Skip a beat and move with my body, yeah, slow

     

    Don't wanna rush it

    Let the rhythm pull you in

    It's here so touch it

    You know what I'm sayin'

    And I haven't said a thin'

    Keep the record playin'

     

    Slow down and dance with me, yeah, slow

    Skip a beat and move with my body, yeah, slow

    Come on and dance with me, yeah, slow

    Skip a beat and move with my body, yeah, slow

     

    Oh, oh, read my body language

    Take it down, down

     

    Slow down and dance with me, yeah, slow

    Skip a beat and move with my body, yeah, slow

    Come on and dance with me, yeah, slow

    (Slow down and dance with me)

    Skip a beat and move with my body, yeah, slow

     

    (Slow down and dance with me)

    Skip a beat and move with my body

    Skip a beat and move with my body

    Skip a beat and move with my body

    Slow

     

    Boom, Boom (Let’s Go Back To My Room) (Paul Lekakis) -  Scoring Tyler

     

    Hey baby I'd like to talk to you 

    How about coming back to my room for a little boom boom

     

    You keep coming to me 

    I can dig your dynamite 

    Know the way you move 

    Get in the groove 

    You're driving me crazy, crazy for you

     

    Second time you moved me 

    It's time for us to Boom Boom 

    You can come right close to me 

    And feel the burning fire 

     

    All the time you got me 

    It's fine for us to boom boom 

    If you see the spark in me 

    And feel my strong desire

     

    Boom Boom Boom 

    Let's go back to my room 

    So we can do it all night 

    And you can make me feel right

    Boom Boom Boom 

    Let's go back to my room 

    So we can do it all night 

    And you can make me feel right

     

    Do the honor to me 

    Don't you know I like to bite 

    Get to the view 

    Closer to you 

     

    You're driving me crazy, crazy for you

    Second time you moved me 

    It's time for us to Boom Boom 

    You can come right close to me 

     

    And feel the burning fire 

    All the time you got me 

    It's fine for us to boom boom 

    If you see the spark in me 

    And feel my strong desire

     

    Boom Boom Boom 

    Let's go back to my room 

    So we can do it all night 

    And you can make me feel right

    Boom Boom Boom 

    Let's go back to my room 

    So we can do it all night 

    And you can make me feel right

     

    No ‘I’ In Threesome (Interpol) - Matt + Sam + Tyler = Mamler

     

    Through the storms and the lie

    Baby, you stood by my side

    And life is wine

    But there are days in this life

    When you see the teeth marks of time

     

    Two lovers divide

    Sound meets sound, babe

    Her echoes, they surround

    And all that we need is one thing

    Now what is there to allow?

     

    Babe, it's time we gave something new a try

    All alone we may fight, so just let us be free

    And, baby, tonight

    I see your lips are on fire

     

    And life is wine

    Now the windows are open, the moon is so bright

    There's no one who can tell us

    What love brings for you and I

    Sound meets sound, babe

    The echoes, they surround

     

    And all that we need is one thing

    Now what is there to allow?

    Babe, it's time we give something new a try

    All alone we may fight, so just let us be free tonight

    Through the storms and the lie

    Baby, you stood by my side

     

    And life is wine

    You feel the sweet breath of time

    It's whispering its truth, not mine

    There's no "I" in threesome

    And I am all for it!

     

    Babe, it's time we give something new a try

    All alone we may fight, and feathers bend like trees in the moonlight

    Babe, it's time we give something new a try

    All alone we may fight, so just let us be free tonight

     

    Moments In Love (Art Of Noise) - Manage A Toir

     

            Moments In Love - Now!

     

    Behind The Mask (Yellow Magic Orchestra) - 

    Taking On ‘The Green Monster’ Game Boss

     

    [Verse 1]

    Now the mask you're wearing

    Is stoney and staring

    Lines and tears, age and fears

    Growing old, passions cold

     

    Now the mask you're wearing

    Is stoney and staring

    Lines and tears, age and fears

    Growing old, passions cold

     

    [Verse 2]

    There's nothing in your eyes

    That marks where you cried

    All is blank, all is blind

    Dead inside, the inner mind

     

    There's nothing in your eyes

    That marks where you cried

    All is blank, all is blind

    Dead inside, the inner mind

     

    [Outro]

    Is it me

    Is it you

    Behind this mask, I ask

     

    Goodbye (FM-84) - The Threesome Breaks Up

     

    As summer fades away 

    Lost in a cloudless haze 

    Just hold me and touch a wave 

    There’s no more we need to say 

     

    Yet I don’t want to say goodbye 

    And I don’t want to see you cry 

     

    And now it’s too late to say goodbye 

    Now I love you 

    And now it’s too late to say goodbye 

    It’s not over 

     

    We’re caught in a moment 

    Lost in a summer breeze 

    Moving in circles 

    As light flickers on the sea 

     

    Now I don’t want to say goodbye 

    And I don’t want to see you cry 

     

    And now it’s too late to say goodbye 

    Now I love you 

    And now it’s too late to say goodbye 

    It’s not over 

    And now it’s too late to say goodbye 

    Ohh na na ohh 

    I know it’s too late to say goodbye 

    Now we’re forever

     

    Innocence (Electric Youth) - Suddenly Becoming Too Old For Games

     

    You catch a shooting star

    You tell me make a wish

    Your word is all I know

    But if the plane is moving fast

    Please secure your mask

    Before you put mine on

     

    And now the rain is falling 

    The truth is bittersweet

    A different voice is calling

    Where have you gone sweet innocence?

    Where have you gone sweet innocence?

     

    Now you ask me what to say

    It used to be your way

    Was the only way I'd known

    But when the table starts to turn

    The teacher starts to learn

    The child starts to grow

     

    And now the rain is falling

    The truth is bittersweet

    A different voice is calling

    Where have you gone sweet innocence?

    Where have you gone sweet innocence?

    I Wonder

     

    Send Me An Angel (Groovecatcher Cover Of Real Life) - Tyler Meets Ariel

     

    Reprise from ‘new kid in school’

     

    Young & Unafraid - Robert DeLong Mix (The Moth & The Flame) - 

    The Courage True Love Brings

     

    Reprise from ‘Kiss Of An Angel’

     

    21st Century Digital Boy (Bad Religion) - Matt Gets His Game Back On

     

    I can't believe it

    The way you look sometimes

    Like a trampled flag on a city street

    Oh yeah

     

    And I don't want it

    The things you're offering me

    Symbolized barcode, quick I.D

    Oh yeah

     

    'Cause I'm a twenty-first century digital boy

    I don't know how to live but I got a lot of toys

    My daddy's a lazy middle-class intellectual

    My mommy's on Valium, so ineffectual

    Ain't life a mystery, yeah?

     

    I can't explain it

    The things you're're saying to me

    It's going yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

    Oh yeah

     

    'Cause I'm a twenty-first century digital boy

    I don't know how to read but I got a lot of toys

    My daddy's a lazy middle-class intellectual

    My mommy's on Valium, so ineffectual, oh

    Ain't life a mystery, yeah?

     

    Tried to tell you about no control

    But now I really don't know

    And then you told me how bad you had to suffer

    Is that really all you have to offer?

     

    'Cause I'm a twenty-first century digital boy

    I don't know how to live but I got a lot of toys

    My daddy's a lazy middle-class intellectual

    My mommy's on Valium, so ineffectual, yeah

    cats, sports, iron claw

     

    (Twenty-first century digital boy) neurosurgeon screams for more

    (Twenty-first century digital boy) innocents raped with napalm fire

    (Twenty-first century digital boy) everything I want, I really need

    Ain't life a mystery, yeah?

     

     

    Why Did I Say Goodbye (Tommy ‘86) - Sam Comes Back To Play

     

    My telephone is playing dead

    I'm hearing voices in my head

     

    I'm going through the words I said

    They replay

     

    I sit on benches in the park

     

    I'm lighting candles in the dark

    I came alone cuz you're too far

    gone away

     

    I did something wrong and I'm

    wondering why

    Why did I let go

    Why did I say goodbye?

     

    I have a void I try to fill

    I was your soulmate although still

    I didn't realize until It was over

    I wish I could slip back in time

    When we were one and all was fine

    But it's too late to make us chime

     

    Love is over

     

    I did something wrong and I'm

    wondering why

    Why did I let go

    Why did I say goodbye?

     

    I did something wrong and I'm

    wondering why

    Why did I let go

    Why did I say goodbye?

    Why did I let go?

    I did something wrong and I'm

    wondering why

    Why did I let go

    Why did I say goodbye?

     

    Look Into My Eyes (Arcade High) - Sam Meets Matt Again For The First Time

     

    Tenderer Electronic Tenderness

     

    Put Your Money On Me (Arcade Fire) - Matt Learns To Bet And Win

     

    Put your money on me

    'Cause I can barely breathe

    Put your money on me

    Put your money on me

    If you think I'm losing you, you must be crazy

    All your money on me

     

    I'm never gonna let you go, even when it's easy

    Put your money on me

    Go tuck me into bed, and wake me when I'm dead

    I know that you gotta be free

    But I'm never gonna let it go

     

    If there was a race

    A race for your heart

    It started before you were born

    Above the chloroform sky

    Clouds made of Ambien

    Sitting on carpets in the basement of heaven

     

    We were born innocent, but it lies today

    And baby you can give all the money away

    But if there's a race, a race for your heart

    It's over, before it starts

    Singing put your money on me

    If you think I'm losing you, you must be crazy

    All your money on me

    I'm never gonna let you go, even when it's easy

     

    Put your money on me

    Go tuck me into bed, and wake me when I'm dead

    I know that you gotta be free

    But I'm never gonna let it go

     

    All my presents are broken, before they're open

    And the promises, the second they're spoken

    I know I've been different

    My skin keeps shedding

     

    My mother was crying on the day of our wedding

    Trumpets of angels call for my head

    But I fight through the ether and I quit when I'm dead

    If you want to know who'll be there in the end

    When you bury me baby, I'll still be your friend

    Singing put your money on me

     

    If you think I'm losing you, you must be crazy

    All your money on me

    I'm never gonna let you go, even when it's easy

    Put your money on me

    Go tuck me into bed, and wake me when I'm dead

    I know that you gotta be free

     

    But I'm never gonna let it go

    Singing put your money on all your money on me

    I know it's not the last time

    Put your money on all your money on me

    (Put your money on me) I know it's not easy

    The Silicon Valleys melted back into silicon

    We'll find a way to survive

     

    Singing put your money on me

    If you think I'm losing you, you must be crazy

    All your money on me (All your money on me)

    I'm never gonna let you go, even when it's easy

    Put your money on me (Put your money on me)

    Go tuck me into bed, then wake me when I'm dead

    I know that you gotta be free (I know that you gotta be free)

    But I'm never gonna let it go

     

    Singing put your money on all your money on me

    (Put your money on me) I know it's not the last time

    Put your money on all your money on me (put your money on)

    I know it's not easy

     

    Put your money on all your money on me

    (Put your money on) I know it's not the last time

    Put your money on all your money on me

    I know it's not easy

     

    The Comeback Kid (The Midnight) - Matt Comes Back

     

    i been so low 

    felt the wind blow 

    like i was a screen door 

    in a thunderstorm 

     

    yeah i've been down 

    i've been laid out 

    but you always were 

    what I came here for 

     

    waiting all day 

    waiting all day 

    just for my say 

    for a bell to ring 

    for the first sting 

     

    Yeah I been blue 

    that ain’t nothing new 

    it’s you my friend 

    you’re why I get up again 

     

    I’ve make mistakes 

    I’ve been hard hit 

    I say so what 

    so what if I did 

    I’m the clear eyed 

    I’m the 

    comeback kid 

    start it over 

    start it over again 

    I'm the clear eyed 

    I'm the comeback kid 

     

    it’s been a rough year 

    been some tough tears 

    I’ve lost so fast 

    all that I had 

     

    but when it’s time to 

    i will fight for you 

    cause you know you are 

    why i’ve come so far 

     

    I’ve make mistakes 

    I’ve been hard hit 

    I say so what 

    so what if I did 

    I’m the clear eyed 

    I’m the 

    comeback kid 

    start it over 

    start it over again 

    I'm the clear eyed 

    I'm the comeback kid

     

    Running To You (Arcade High) - Sam and Matt, Playmates Forever

     

    You’re still the one

    I Run To

    You’re still the *One*!

    (X)

     

     Arcade Summer (FM-84 & MrM) - 

    ‘The Sun Still Shines Bright On Our Arcade Summer’

     

    Do you remember

    When we were young

    A certain shopping center

    Where we could have so such fun . . .

     

    In our 

    Arcade Summer!

    In an 

    Arcade Summer!

    In our

    Arcade Summer!

     

    We were alive there (In our Arcade Summer)

    We were in love there (In our Arcade Summer)

    Life was so simple there (In an Arcade Summer)

    Love was so perfect there (In an Arcade Summer)

     

    And the cruel school year was so far away

    And all our best friends would come down to play

    And the Arcade was open every day

    And the Summer of love was here to stay in our

     

    Arcade Summer!

    In an 

    Arcade Summer!

    In our

    Arcade Summer!

    In an

    Arcade Summer!

     

    We were alive there (In our Arcade Summer)

    We were in love there (In our Arcade Summer)

    Life was so simple there (In an Arcade Summer)

    Love was so perfect there (In an Arcade Summer)

     

    You were standing

    Right beside me

    While I was playing

    Then I was falling

     

    And I thought that

    It was passed time

    That we ought to

    Get in some Funtime

     

    And We were so alive there

    And We were so in love there

    And Life was so simple there

    And Our love was perfect there

     

    And so I kissed you hard then

    And so you smiled at me then

    And so you kissed me hard then

    And so I smiled at you then

     

    In our 

    Arcade Summer!

    In an 

    Arcade Summer!

    In our

    Arcade Summer!

    In an

    Arcade Summer!

     

    We were alive there (In our Arcade Summer)

    We were in love there (In our Arcade Summer)

    Life was so simple there (In an Arcade Summer)

    Love was so perfect there (In an Arcade Summer)

     

    We were ALIVE there (In our Arcade Summer)!

    We were in LOVE there (In our Arcade Summer)!

    Life was so SIMPLE there (In an Arcade Summer)!

    Love was so PERFECT there (In an Arcade Summer)!

    Love was so very PURE there (In our Arcade Summer)!

     

    The sun still shines bright on

    Our Arcade Summer . . .

     
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