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Terry's Ballade

AC Benus

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Ballade:

 

Shadows creep up my wall to say

The time is ticking fast on me

And though I wait, it's long in the day

To have so many doubts about me –

To weigh me down, and not be free.

Questions crawl up my heart inside

Where no one sees, not even me

The shadow's pace that I long to hide.

 

Then sometimes it seems I should pray

Humbly upon a bended knee

To hurry up the long Judgment Day

That from my mind will clear the debris –

That will rend my heart most holy.

So until that time, I'll just betide

And pretend that I can flee

The shadow's pace that I long to hide.

 

But it's hard to feel so astray

And in every face only see

Lingering mistrust; ideas run away,

Where no truth that no one can see –

Where every soul's a refugee.

What they can spy on the outside

Only confirms that they can see

The shadow's pace that I long to hide.

 

I seek the light shining its ray

From top of sky in apogee

When no shade is cast that's not at bay

And no one looking can disagree –

And they must themselves oversee.

If such a place exists flip-side

It's only there that I will free

The shadow's pace that I long to hide.

 

Envoi:

 

But you, tyrant that ever be

Your only demand is suicide –

To your hallow gift all decree

The shadow's pace that I long to hide.

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3 Comments


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Terry is a teenage boy having trouble dealing with his queerness. He finds comfort in lyric poetry and dirty limericks.

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13 minutes ago, Parker Owens said:

And you write this brilliantly. 

Thank you for the kind comment, my friend :) 

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