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Sasha Distan

Entry posted by Sasha Distan

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We might have done something insane. A suspect a lot of you might think so. We have made a mad, crazy, awesome, wonderful, expensive, fabulous, impulsive choice. Again.

Our little Goblin is currently 17 months old, gorgeous, blond, fluffy, blue-eyed, intent on digging in the dirt, playing with his brother Dashi, pointing excitedly at tractors, ‘helping’ water the garden, and getting to know the sheep and lambs at the farm.

So we thought we’d get him a sibling – a real human sibling (which in no way diminishes Dashi’s position as his only older brother).

Yes, we’re insane.

New Baby will be a blood relative of Goblin, and we will be accepting delivery of them sometime in mid August. Goblin will be 22 months old, we’ll have two in nappies, we won’t be sleeping, life will be harder, more expensive, and potentially more stressful.

Why on earth have we chosen to do this? I couldn’t tell you. We love being parents to our little man, neither of us would have life any other way now. So why not?

Sure, every now and then I have a split second desire of student life with clubs and loud music, louder outfits, and flirting with pretty boys. But then, I think the reason I look back so fondly, was because we were young, we’d just got together, and it was fun to be cute and desirable late at night in Brighton. I wouldn’t go back to that life for all the money, all the books, or all the pretty horses in the ‘verse.

I see dads and mums in the woods, by the beach, in town sometimes, with their gaggle and brood of children in different heights, chatting, squabbling, giggling, sharing ice cream, playing games – and I want that life. Our one boy is perfect and marvellous, but I want him to have siblings to fight with and play with. So here we go.

If I seem distracted, that’s why.

As last time, I am not prepared to talk, openly or privately, about the ins, outs, or specifics of how we are going about this, and we thank you in advance for your understanding.

So, anyone got any advice how to tell the Goblin he’s going to have an even smaller person in his life?

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jess30519
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Speaking from zero experience, I'd think that just telling Goblin what's happening like it's the normal course of events would be best. Without in any way letting him see that you're worried about his reaction. Of course, you might consider buying him a tractor - that is always a good idea!

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Puppilull
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Such happy news! Congratulations! 

 

Goblin is very young and truly understanding there's another little human on the way is next to impossible for grown ups, so he probably won't. Still, being very hands on, talking about babies, letting him visit the growing belly etc could prepare him. Maybe counting down with some sort of calendar? 

 

As for jealousy... Who knows? My oldest never showed any jealousy, but she's very independent. Only solution is to love and love and love, with some patience. And I think you already do that. 

Edited by Puppilull
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dughlas

Having only one child I never had this to do. And it's far too long ago for me to recall how my parents told me. I do remember I was thilled to have a baby sister.

Congrats to all of you on this next step.

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Headstall
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In my house it was 'the more the merrier.' so CONGRATULATIONS. I'm sure you know what to do for Goblin. We involved each one in the next one coming... there were no surprises, and no problems. We never had a single issue with jealousy... not even to this day. I'm happy for you and hubby and Goblin, Sasha. You warmed my heart and wetted my eyes :) 

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glitteryantlers

Congratulations! I think you will manage it just fine. We have three children and we have some sibling rivalry. Interesting is, the younger ones are more jealous than the other way around. 

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mollyhousemouse

I am so happy for you and your family!  :hug:

 

Goblin, being not quite 2, will grow into the roll of Big Brother.  Keep the conversation simple, give him a baby of his own to nurture. Whether it's a baby doll, or a stuffed bear (or dog, lamb, sheep)

With all the love in your house, y'all will do fine!

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Sasha Distan
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Thanks y'all, I am grinning madly from all the hugs. You're all so supportive - and none of you told me we are nuts (you're good liars, well done).

 

Goblin is a pretty independent, sensitive little beast (who likes drawing in the mud with sticks), about the only thing he'll watch on YouTube is cross-country horse trials, and he cries if someone falls off. We'll get him being all soft and gentle with the lambs soon enough.

 

And maybe get him another tractor.

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Kitt

We'll finally! I thought you were gonna make me bite my tongue till arrival!

 

As for telling Goblin just the facts mister. Short and sweet but dead honest answers. Let him listen to the belly any time possible. 

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Reader1810
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Congratulations!!

 

From the stories that you have shared regarding your little man Gobin,, I have know doubt that you're going to get it right when your pack grows to four. 

 

Still, I do wonder how Cris ever got his tea made without his supervisor showing him the way. I guess he will be an expert with two supervisors, eh? ;)

 

Edit: Off topic, but I just have to say the photo of the four wolves is just gorgeous. Love it! :D

Edited by Reader1810
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DynoReads
3 hours ago, mollyhousemouse said:

Keep the conversation simple, give him a baby of his own to nurture. Whether it's a baby doll, or a stuffed bear (or dog, lamb, sheep)

With all the love in your house, y'all will do fine!

Keep it in terms h'll understand, something like a baby is going to come live with us.

I 100% agree he needs his own baby to take care of, especially when his parental units are caring for the baby, he can do the same for his. We did this with my oldest nephew. Don't be surprised , or upset, if he shows jealousy or anger on his baby. At one point my sister was feeding the baby and my nephew was upset and sat on his doll. 

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glitteryantlers

What I wanted to add, babywearing is a great thing: you mentioned you carry Goblin. Maybe at 22 months sometimes he wants to be carried. Or you carry the little one and you can do all the things you use to do with Goblin and have both hands free.

My kids carried their toys in toy carriers too. Tractors and lorries too :-D

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Sasha Distan
On 17/04/2017 at 3:18 PM, glitteryantlers said:

What I wanted to add, babywearing is a great thing: you mentioned you carry Goblin. Maybe at 22 months sometimes he wants to be carried. Or you carry the little one and you can do all the things you use to do with Goblin and have both hands free.

My kids carried their toys in toy carriers too. Tractors and lorries too :-D

 

Oh yeah, we went from the wrap (0-5 months) to an ergobaby 360 (5-17 months) and now we use a big rucksack style carrier (second hand! Score!) which he likes because he gets to be REALLY tall and can see over my head. Boy's getting heavy though.

 

 

Thank you to everyone for your well wishes. We're busy over here organising the nursery so that it'll sleep two, and wondering how we're going to fit a second dresser in there for the clothes for the new one... Also, trying to stop the grandparents getting excited and buying lots of new clothes and things - after all we still have everything Goblin had, and there isn't that much storage space in our house.

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clochette

So happy for you guys! I'm sure little Goblin will be a great big brother, from what you said he seems pretty independant already. 

As for jealousy, dont worry sibling love goes with some jealousy at a moment or another (the family tale is that I loved my little brother but thought he should stay at the hospital) but he's still young so it should go smoothly. My cousins are about the same age difference as your kids will be and they've always been like twins, the age difference is starting to show as at 10 she's a girly pre teen talking about shoes, handbags and he at 8 is still pretty much a little a boy playing with his cars and running around in the garden :)

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Rndmrunner

a little late to this entry but congrats all the same. We have a singleton so no experience with being outnumbered (c Dasha) but we did have 2 dogs as well for a while but alas the elder dog was old and ...  It sounds like you are enjoying your family which is the most important thing in my book. Have children because you want them and want to share your lives.  the rest works itself out in its own messy way. 

 

All the best as you grow your family.

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