A couple of months ago I posted a blog entry Who Are You? It was something to learn about people on GA. It did very well. I'm grateful for that.
After that I had many people tell me they enjoyed it. People like Dodger. A presence and character I enjoy seeing. Some of you may know, he is selective about what he visits. So if he pops up I think I did good. Its the selective ones that make me nervous. Am I liked enough for people to visit. This doesn't refer to Dodger. He has always showed friendship and concern when I was about to leave GA.
Not long after this blog entry I was approached by William King. He wanted me to do a blog on screen names. William was curious about the roots of my name. It was something I've considered about many names as well. William said he was busy with many things. He couldn't do it. Told me to consider doing it. I was the right person to do it with the success of first blog. This turned into What's in a Screen Name?
This started the pressure for me. Not William's fault. I've had self issues for years. Doubt, hate, the list goes on. I have very good friends on GA, but still feel somewhat isolated. When I'm not comfortable I shutdown. I also have a hard time starting conversations. This is due to me being introverted and a submissive personality.
I started posting poetry on GA. Something I've done for myself for years. Along with my journal. Recently many have been about lifestyle and things I've been dealing with. Topics which make some people uncomfortable. That's ok... However, for me I've felt an outsider on GA and Poetry Society. Nothing intentional.. Also just part of my doubt and sensitive nature.
Anyways... My blog entry Whats in a screen name? was successful. The community involvement I wanted. I thank you for that.
For the one always feeling on the outside... I'm happy you enjoyed and participated. I would love to do more to involve the community. However, the fear of rejection often appears. I've been given ideas for more. To those people, I really am considering them. I just have to build myself up again.
Right now I have some personal issues that require my time and attention. The year has continued to keep me off-center. Leaving me unsettled, without focus or control.
These entries and community interactions are what I would like to create more of.
Much Love, jp