Corrupt A Wish

[drpaladin]

1 minute ago, Valkyrie said:

  

 

Granted.  I call you and invite you over for grilled pickled herring steak.  With mushroom sauce.  

 

I wish I had a grill so I could grill Dr. P's steak.   

Granted. Now your neighbors drive you crazy wanting to use it. They never seem compelled to share anything they cook.

 

I wish I had never told Val about the mushrooms.

[Valkyrie]

Just now, drpaladin said:

Granted. Now your neighbors drive you crazy wanting to use it. They never seem compelled to share anything they cook.

 

I wish I had never told Val about the mushrooms.

   

 

Granted.  I now think you like mushrooms, so put it on all your food since I'm trying to be nice.  

 

I wish I had a Jacuzzi tub.  

[drpaladin]

1 minute ago, Valkyrie said:

   

 

Granted.  I now think you like mushrooms, so put it on all your food since I'm trying to be nice.  

 

I wish I had a Jacuzzi tub.  

Granted. Now you have naked neighbors using it. Ever notice only ugly people like being naked?

 

I wish I could stop thinking about Val's mushrooms. Ick...

[Valkyrie]

11 minutes ago, drpaladin said:

Granted. Now you have naked neighbors using it. Ever notice only ugly people like being naked?

 

I wish I could stop thinking about Val's mushrooms. Ick...

Granted.  You're thinking of my ugly naked neighbors instead.  

 

I wish I had hot neighbors.  

[drpaladin]

1 minute ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  You're thinking of my ugly naked neighbors instead.  

 

I wish I had hot neighbors.  

Granted. They're hot. That's why they're naked. Still ugly though.

 

I wish something was on TV tonight I wanted to see. Jillions of channels and nothing to watch.

[Valkyrie]

Just now, drpaladin said:

Granted. They're hot. That's why they're naked. Still ugly though.

 

I wish something was on TV tonight I wanted to see. Jillions of channels and nothing to watch.

Granted.  There's a cat sitting on your tv.  Staring at you.  

 

I wish I had good looking neighbors.   

[Wesley8890]

Just now, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  There's a cat sitting on your tv.  Staring at you.  

 

I wish I had good looking neighbors.   

Granted but now they're no longer naked

 

I wish I had a better job

[Valkyrie]

1 minute ago, Wesley8890 said:

Granted but now they're no longer naked

 

I wish I had a better job

Granted.  You make one cent per hour more than your old job. 

 

I wish it wasn't so dark out. 

[drpaladin]

1 minute ago, Wesley8890 said:

Granted but now they're no longer naked

 

I wish I had a better job

Granted. You have the best job in the world, but you get laid off.

 

I wish I still had cats.

[drpaladin]

Just now, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  You make one cent per hour more than your old job. 

 

I wish it wasn't so dark out. 

Granted. It's bright day and night.

 

I still wish I had cats.

[Valkyrie]

5 minutes ago, drpaladin said:

Granted. It's bright day and night.

 

I still wish I had cats.

Granted.  You now have 1000 zombie cats as pets.  

 

I wish I had better teeth. 

[drpaladin]

35 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  You now have 1000 zombie cats as pets.  

 

I wish I had better teeth. 

Granted. The best teeth fifteen bucks can buy.

 

I wish those thousand zombie cats would stop staring at me.

[Cynus]

37 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  You now have 1000 zombie cats as pets.  

 

I wish I had better teeth. 

Granted. You have the best teeth in the world, but they've been made into a necklace for you by some psychotic dentist.

 

I wish I didn't have to go back into work tonight.

[Cynus]

Just now, drpaladin said:

Granted. The best teeth fifteen bucks can buy.

 

I wish those thousand zombie cats would stop staring at me.

Granted. Those zombie cats are eyeless now, but their heads are still inclined in your direction,

I wish I didn't have to go back into work tonight.

[Valkyrie]

Just now, drpaladin said:

Granted. The best teeth fifteen bucks can buy.

 

I wish those thousand zombie cats would stop staring at me.

Granted.  They're now gnawing on your brains.  

Just now, Cynus said:

Granted. You have the best teeth in the world, but they've been made into a necklace for you by some psychotic dentist.

 

I wish I didn't have to go back into work tonight.

Granted.  You don't have to go back to work ever and waste away from boredom. 

 

I wish that the cats cleaned their own litterboxes. 

[drpaladin]

2 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  They're now gnawing on your brains.  

Granted.  You don't have to go back to work ever and waste away from boredom. 

 

I wish that the cats cleaned their own litterboxes. 

Granted. You are now absolutely useless to them.

 

I wish I had already fixed dinner.

[Valkyrie]

Just now, drpaladin said:

Granted. You are now absolutely useless to them.

 

I wish I had already fixed dinner.

Not totally useless.  I still need to feed them  

 

Granted.  Portobello mushroom burgers with cippolini mushroom sauce and a side of hen of the woods mushrooms.  (you had to have seen that coming...   LOL)

 

I wish Candy Crush had unlimited lives. 

[drpaladin]

6 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

Not totally useless.  I still need to feed them  

 

Granted.  Portobello mushroom burgers with cippolini mushroom sauce and a side of hen of the woods mushrooms.  (you had to have seen that coming...   LOL)

 

I wish Candy Crush had unlimited lives. 

Cmon. If they can clean a litterbox, they can feed themselves.

 

Granted. Now it's too boring to play.

 

I wish it was winter already.

[Daddydavek]

Granted!  (Which wasn't hard since you live on the south side of the equator and just enjoyed the winter solstice.) However, it's warmer and dryer than usual....

 

I wish I had a better handle on how to structure my RMD's on my 401k when I turn 70 and one/half next year...

[Cynus]

23 hours ago, Daddydavek said:

Granted!  (Which wasn't hard since you live on the south side of the equator and just enjoyed the winter solstice.) However, it's warmer and dryer than usual....

 

I wish I had a better handle on how to structure my RMD's on my 401k when I turn 70 and one/half next year...

Granted. You manage to attach a better handle to the structure, but then you realize this isn't woodshop and you still have no idea how to approach the issue.

 

I wish this boy I'm flirting with was easier to read.

[Valkyrie]

3 minutes ago, Cynus said:

Granted. You manage to attach a better handle to the structure, but then you realize this isn't woodshop and you still have no idea how to approach the issue.

 

I wish this boy I'm flirting with was easier to read.

Granted.  You can read him like a book.  He's straight and not into you.  

 

I wish that I had done laundry today. 

[Cynus]

3 hours ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  You can read him like a book.  He's straight and not into you.  

 

I wish that I had done laundry today. 

Hah! He is DEFINITELY not straight. And he is into me, thankfully.

Granted. You did so many loads of laundry today that you realize you've been washing clothes for the whole neighborhood, and you wonder when you became such a kleptomaniac.

I wish I could tell him how I feel, but it's too early... *sigh*

[Freerider]

On 6/25/2017 at 6:02 AM, Cynus said:

Hah! He is DEFINITELY not straight. And he is into me, thankfully.

Granted. You did so many loads of laundry today that you realize you've been washing clothes for the whole neighborhood, and you wonder when you became such a kleptomaniac.

I wish I could tell him how I feel, but it's too early... *sigh*

Granted, but now it is too late...

 

I wish my bf would not annoy me so much...

[Valkyrie]

27 minutes ago, Freerider said:

Granted, but now it is too late...

 

I wish my bf would not annoy me so much...

Granted.  He dumped you so now he doesn't annoy you at all. 

 

I wish my tummy wasn't rumbling.  

[Cynus]

4 hours ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  He dumped you so now he doesn't annoy you at all. 

 

I wish my tummy wasn't rumbling.  

Granted. It's not your tummy, but a magnitude 8 earthquake.

 

I wish my date hadn't been canceled today.