Jump to content

National Coming Out Day!


Recommended Posts

4 minutes ago, Hunter Thomson said:

It’s been a little less than 15 years since my parents forced my closet door open. Good times, bad times, unforgettably hilarious times... I’d have missed them all if I hadn’t learned to embrace myself. I only wish I had done so earlier.

Were you even a teenager yet? How much younger could you have been? (I only realized I might be Gay when I was 13, but that was back in the Jurassic Period of LGBTQ history!) I write that, then I realize I’ve watched documentaries about Trans kids in elementary school (yes, I know that’s not the same, but there are parallels).

Link to comment
12 minutes ago, BlindAmbition said:

I screamed it to the world 26 years ago. My closet is dark and empty.

We LGBTQ people are continually Coming Out to new people that we meet. Sometimes it’s verbal, sometimes there are other clues – I found out my postal carrier is a Lesbian because she was wearing rainbow-striped socks! I’m wearing my NCOD t-shirt today – it’s ancient and even has the original NCOD date printed on it: October 11, 1989! Some of you weren’t even born yet!  ;-)

Link to comment
2 minutes ago, droughtquake said:

Were you even a teenager yet? How much younger could you have been? (I only realized I might be Gay when I was 13, but that was back in the Jurassic Period of LGBTQ history!) I write that, then I realize I’ve watched documentaries about Trans kids in elementary school (yes, I know that’s not the same, but there are parallels).

I didn’t know until teens. However; I can now identify crush on boy as early as 8.

  • Like 2
  • Love 1
Link to comment
26 minutes ago, droughtquake said:

Today is National Coming Out Day in the US! It’s a day to commemorate by Outing yourself to someone – even (especially?) if it’s only to yourself! We have more power when we are more visible!

I hope that those of us outside the US are invited to join in.

21 minutes ago, BlindAmbition said:

I screamed it to the world 26 years ago. My closet is dark and empty.

What a wonderful statement JP. My closet is empty too.

17 minutes ago, Hunter Thomson said:

It’s been a little less than 15 years since my parents forced my closet door open. Good times, bad times, unforgettably hilarious times... I’d have missed them all if I hadn’t learned to embrace myself. I only wish I had done so earlier.

Yeah, I think that you were young enough. I was a teenager too and although it wasn't my choice at the time to come out, I've never regretted it and would never have wanted it to be any different. I'm happy and comfortable with who I am.

  • Like 2
  • Love 2
Link to comment
24 minutes ago, Dodger said:

I hope that those of us outside the US are invited to join in.

What a wonderful statement JP. My closet is empty too.

Yeah, I think that you were young enough. I was a teenager too and although it wasn't my choice at the time to come out, I've never regretted it and would never have wanted it to be any different. I'm happy and comfortable with who I am.

No matter by choice or not... Most probably dreaded the actual moment. Then realization of liberation and self-acceptance. Free to love yourself and someone else.

  • Like 3
Link to comment

I don’t advocate that NCOD be mandatory especially for the more vulnerable (those dependent on others, those who live in dangerous countries, those who could be prosecuted or killed, etc). That’s why I mentioned Coming Out to yourself. Be smart, stay safe.

Link to comment
13 minutes ago, JackBinimbul said:

Ya know...I know it's supposed to be about visibility and all, but I have such strong objections to NCO. 

 

I have watched people peer-pressured in to coming out to friends and/or family when they aren't ready or are at risk for doing so.  I've watched people berate, ridicule and even out "friends" who have refused to participate.  I've watched anti-LGBT groups trolling NCO hashtags for fresh, vulnerable victims. The most at risk are minors who may not take into account the nuance, intricacies and far-reaching impact of jumping on the bandwagon. 

 

While I fully support someone's choice to come out and applaud any effort for solidarity, NCO has just become a shit-show and needs some serious rebranding.

 

Here is an article about some of the problems, for those interested.  

A good point and a very good article. I can only speak for myself and people who I know. I am fortunate to live in a fairly liberal-minded society but I am aware there are still serious issues to be addressed and I certainly wouldn't encourage everyone to out themselves, especially if they are young or vulnerable. Like many, I didn't choose to come out but I was lucky to have people around me who supported and encouraged me. My experience was fairly tame but still scary enough for a 15-year-old. It should always be a personal choice and each case is different. I would never advise anyone to come out unless I knew them well enough to be sure that they weren't putting themselves at risk by doing so.      

  • Like 2
Link to comment
44 minutes ago, Dodger said:

I hope that those of us outside the US are invited to join in.

The whole point of NCOD is to be more visible! Of course you’re invited! It’s just that it was started by the US-based Human Rights Campaign…  ;-)

 

Logo_ncod_lg.png

This logo was designed by Keith Haring!

 

national-coming-out-day.jpg&f=1

This one clearly wasn’t!

 

national-coming-out-day.jpg&f=1

(Keith didn’t do this one either.)

Edited by Former Member
Link to comment
2 hours ago, droughtquake said:

Were you even a teenager yet? How much younger could you have been? (I only realized I might be Gay when I was 13, but that was back in the Jurassic Period of LGBTQ history!) I write that, then I realize I’ve watched documentaries about Trans kids in elementary school (yes, I know that’s not the same, but there are parallels).

Lol no I was 12. Still act 12 sometimes too 😛

 

2 hours ago, Dodger said:

I hope that those of us outside the US are invited to join in.

What a wonderful statement JP. My closet is empty too.

Yeah, I think that you were young enough. I was a teenager too and although it wasn't my choice at the time to come out, I've never regretted it and would never have wanted it to be any different. I'm happy and comfortable with who I am.

I got caught sexting. Enough said. Zero regrets now though.

 

 

  • Like 4
  • Haha 1
Link to comment

I know it's very well intentioned - but this makes me feel uneasy.  Every time someone 'comes out' it also feels (to me) as though attention is just as drawn to the 'in' thus perpetuating the heteronormative view, and I'd much rather that everyone could just 'be'.  Greater visibility is most likely a very positive thing, and whilst I'm sure that it does happen, I'm equally sure that NCOD wasn't conceived with the intention of pushing people into making a decision the weren't ready for.  But still, it makes me feel unsettled.  Sorry, this is now just mildly ranty and I'm not sure what I want to say any more.  The Keith Haring logo is very cool too.

  • Like 4
Link to comment
2 minutes ago, Sam Wyer said:

I know it's very well intentioned - but this makes me feel uneasy.  Every time someone 'comes out' it also feels (to me) as though attention is just as drawn to the 'in' thus perpetuating the heteronormative view, and I'd much rather that everyone could just 'be'.  Greater visibility is most likely a very positive thing, and whilst I'm sure that it does happen, I'm equally sure that NCOD wasn't conceived with the intention of pushing people into making a decision the weren't ready for.  But still, it makes me feel unsettled.  Sorry, this is now just mildly ranty and I'm not sure what I want to say any more.  The Keith Haring logo is very cool too.

For me... Coming out should ALWAYS be the decision of one coming out. It should never be a statement, just acceptance and loving yourself.

  • Like 5
Link to comment

I don’t think I’m particularly obvious. I’m not flamboyant and my speech isn’t affected (not that I believe there’s anything wrong with anyone who fits that description), but I don’t like sports and I’m not obsessed with huge breasts (or chests, for that matter). But I’ve Come Out to several people who have told me they’d already figured it out.  ;-)

 

But being Out is much more comfortable for me. No one is trying to set me up with their single female friend. I’m not expected to laugh at their sexist ‘jokes.’ I don’t have to pretend.

Link to comment

I always enjoyed the fact that coming out actually did shock most of the people I've told. Sure, there were always the jokes and gossip that I was gay that I fought back against before I accepted myself, but when I told those same people that I was gay it threw them for quite the loop. There's something very satisfying about being called a gay slur, acknowledging it as true and breaking that person's brain because they thought they were just being a tease and now they realize they used a slur against someone they cared about in a way that could actually be construed as hurtful. 

Life gets better. It gets better to get older and to come out and escape the stress of it all. I won't trade those memories for anything, except a chance to repeat those memories, because some of those coming out moments were glorious.

  • Like 2
  • Love 2
Link to comment
49 minutes ago, BlindAmbition said:

No shame in that. 

If only you'd seen the things I'd written and he'd written. You'd be embarrassed for us both, but only because of how bad our writing was. Worst quality sexting ever. :P

  • Like 1
  • Haha 3
Link to comment
1 minute ago, Hunter Thomson said:

If only you'd seen the things I'd written and he'd written. You'd be embarrassed for us both, but only because of how bad our writing was. Worst quality sexting ever. :P

I’m sure you were distracted…  ;-)

Link to comment
Just now, droughtquake said:

I’m sure you were distracted…  ;-)

I'm not even going to pretend to deny this.

 

1 minute ago, droughtquake said:

@Hunter Thomson it sounds like you’re in a better place than when you first moved a few weeks ago!  ;-)

Yes, thank you. This was my first time moving out and living semi-independently, so there was a measure of stress involved. But I've settled into my new environment quite well, and I'm less stressed now that I've talked to my professors about how I'm doing in class so far.

  • Like 2
  • Love 1
Link to comment
15 minutes ago, Hunter Thomson said:

If only you'd seen the things I'd written and he'd written. You'd be embarrassed for us both, but only because of how bad our writing was. Worst quality sexting ever. :P

I'll give you a pass. Hard to hold your pecker and text at same time.

  • Like 1
  • Haha 3
Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Our Privacy Policy can be found here: Privacy Policy. We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue..