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Imagine Question For This Week

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So, we briefly touched on this the last time I was in the Chatterbox Chatroom, and some of you guys had stuff to say about it and wanted to share your personal experience. So let's do it. I'm sure that many of us can relate.

 

Do you consider yourself a shy person when it comes to connecting to other people? For some, talking to strangers or even to friends and loved ones can come off as being a terrifying experience. Or at least scary enough that you'd want to avoid that kind of contact at all costs. Does this describe you? And can you explain why?

 

Now, I'm not talking about being 'introverted'. That's different. I can understand someone that just likes their private space and isn't really interested in being surrounded by people all the time. That's fine. But there are people that I talk to all the time that tell me they're shy but it makes them absolutely <I>miserable</I>. They can't talk in public, they feel disconnected from their friends, they're afraid to go to the chatroom, they're afraid to post on the forums (even <I>anonymously</I>)...they actually WANT to take a step forward...but won't.

 

Why? What is it that we're so afraid of? Tell us your story if you're feeling up to it. I spent a lot of my life being painfully shy myself, and I'm still plagued by it from time to time. But I'm a LOT better than I was, believe me. Shyness can be a serious problem for some people. There's nothing to be ashamed of when talking about it, and there's no real 'cure' for it other than self confidence and practice. So give us your 'shy guy' tales! And if you're one of the shy people who have never posted here before...now would be a great time to make an introduction. :)

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They fear that the inner voice inside is right. That:

  • I am unattractive
  • I am undesirable
  • I am unloveable
  • I am worthless
  • I should be dead

Each rejection supports these points and makes them sharper. The pain of any rejection aplifies the pain of these points to unbearable levels. Usually, for very shy people, their sensitive natures play against them in this hard world and others smell weakness so they inject these points into them like lasting venom. Done early enough, the damage becomes permanent.

 

It's too bad, really. The shy person is just the sort of person most of us are looking for: the one who feels the deepest and loves the deepest. The one where sex becomes a feast of rare delights. The one who is the cure for the lonliness we all have. The loyal one. The beloved one. The one who knows pain and wishes only to take it away from someone they love.

 

Go to the library sometime. Find him. He's sitting there toward the back, there a bashful beauty hiding from those that hate him because of his sweetness. Or the one against the wall afraid the others will 'know' the secret mantra of the Five Deadly Points in his head and expose them for all to ridicule, because the Wolves have done it before.

 

The one who is Gay and can't be because he is told that is evil which means that he was BORN evil. Thus he bears the added point:

 

  • I am damned

To the list.

 

~~~~

 

Loneliness and isolation are the fruits of shyness and eventually that shyness just turns into bitterness and what was once beautiful shrivels and dies. It becomes a black pit where once a heart was. Just because someone 'not' shy never bothered to say 'Hi!'

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6 hours ago, MrM said:

They fear that the inner voice inside is right. That:

  • I am unattractive
  • I am undesirable
  • I am unloveable
  • I am worthless
  • I should be dead

Each rejection supports these points and makes them sharper. The pain of any rejection aplifies the pain of these points to unbearable levels. Usually, for very shy people, their sensitive natures play against them in this hard world and others smell weakness so they inject these points into them like lasting venom. Done early enough, the damage becomes permanent.

 

It's too bad, really. The shy person is just the sort of person most of us are looking for: the one who feels the deepest and loves the deepest. The one where sex becomes a feast of rare delights. The one who is the cure for the lonliness we all have. The loyal one. The beloved one. The one who knows pain and wishes only to take it away from someone they love.

 

Go to the library sometime. Find him. He's sitting there toward the back, there a bashful beauty hiding from those that hate him because of his sweetness. Or the one against the wall afraid the others will 'know' the secret mantra of the Five Deadly Points in his head and expose them for all to ridicule, because the Wolves have done it before.

 

The one who is Gay and can't be because he is told that is evil which means that he was BORN evil. Thus he bears the added point:

 

  • I am damned

To the list.

 

~~~~

 

Loneliness and isolation are the fruits of shyness and eventually that shyness just turns into bitterness and what was once beautiful shrivels and dies. It becomes a black pit where once a heart was. Just because someone 'not' shy never bothered to say 'Hi!'

ya hit the nail on the head... I really appreciate your honesty, and emotion...The evilness of being Gay has been the hardest, even though times are changing... the Family is not... Sad that morals are so one sided... Thanks You know when I really ponder on it The LGBT family has shown the other side of the Morals of bigots !!! :heart: :hug:

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To begin with, I used to be a shy and insecure person. This is because I grew up with an abusive mother and an absentee father. My mother would endlessly compare me to other kids which created an inferiority complex when I was a child. No matter how good I am, I will never be enough in her eyes. Even if I was bringing medals at home, she always have something negative to say. The approval and affirmation as a human being I should have received when I was a child was never given. Thus, I was a mix of opposites. I feel like everyone is better than me. But as I grew up, I learned to be competitive that's why I had the knack of being arrogant and bragging. Something clicked inside of me and I would crave for the approval for other people.

 

To make things worse, I was exposed to early sex play when I was 8. A group of older guys molested and used me for their sexual pleasures. I was passed around like a ragdoll, thinking it was something normal things that guys would do. But when I grew up, I was wrong. Because it left me damaged in receiving love. To me back then, love is only received if you have something done for them. In reality, love should be selfless and doesn't demand anything in return. It should be freely given. Furthermore, my best friend was killed in front of me. The trauma left so much up until this day. In the end, my idea of love was twisted. That twisted mindset will show up every now and then.

 

It allowed me to be a highly competitive individual that puts excellence into a different level. I became strict and disciplined with myself. To the point that I have high expectations of others as well. The perfectionist inside of me will always scream for every unnoticed mistake that I make. And it didn't give me the freedom to be a normal human person with a dose of weaknesses.

 

This is why my stories are always themed with human weaknesses. Because we shouldn't reject those. But rather, we embrace our weakness because if we start being pretentious and display a perfect life, but a rotting one inside, it would be all useless. Change should always start from the inside. Real power begins at the confession and acceptance of our weaknesses. That's why I create scenarios that force my characters to accept their downsides. Reality doesn't always allow us to do such.

 

Right now, some people confuse me as extroverted because I easily create friends wherever I go. I have accepted my ups and downs. It allowed me to live honestly without batting an eye in regards to the opinions of others. Thankfully, God sent me to a safe community in church wherein I was protected and nourished with love. I turned from shy and insecure into someone who is transparent to people.

 

Perhaps I shared too much. I almost stood naked in this post. And if I did, someone would have loved to slap one of my butt cheeks. Although that would always be welcomed. :lol:

 

Spoiler

In case you were wondering why I was "chosen" for such acts, here is a fetus pic of me. I think that incident happened a few months after this pic was taken.59e0a93d39516_PhotoNov14113307PM.thumb.jpg.5da6652afa9208fd78ce916b83c0b5a8.jpg

Edited by Solus Magus
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2 hours ago, Solus Magus said:

To begin with, I used to be a shy and insecure person. This is because I grew up with an abusive mother and an absentee father. My mother would endlessly compare me to other kids which created an inferiority complex when I was a child. No matter how good I am, I will never be enough in her eyes. Even if I was bringing medals at home, she always have something negative to say. The approval and affirmation as a human being I should have received when I was a child was never given. Thus, I was a mix of opposites. I feel like everyone is better than me. But as I grew up, I learned to be competitive that's why I had the knack of being arrogant and bragging. Something clicked inside of me and I would crave for the approval for other people.

 

To make things worse, I was exposed to early sex play when I was 8. A group of older guys molested and used me for their sexual pleasures. I was passed around like a ragdoll, thinking it was something normal things that guys would do. But when I grew up, I was wrong. Because it left me damaged in receiving love. To me back then, love is only received if you have something done for them. In reality, love should be selfless and doesn't demand anything in return. It should be freely given. Furthermore, my best friend was killed in front of me. The trauma left so much up until this day. In the end, my idea of love was twisted. That twisted mindset will show up every now and then.

 

It allowed me to be a highly competitive individual that puts excellence into a different level. I became strict and disciplined with myself. To the point that I have high expectations of others as well. The perfectionist inside of me will always scream for every unnoticed mistake that I make. And it didn't give me the freedom to be a normal human person with a dose of weaknesses.

 

This is why my stories are always themed with human weaknesses. Because we should reject those. But rather, we embrace our weakness because if we start being pretentious and display a perfect life, but a rotting one inside, it would be all useless. Change should always start from the inside. Real power begins at the confession and acceptance of our weaknesses. That's why I create scenarios that force my characters to accept their downsides. Reality doesn't always allow us to do such.

 

Right now, some people confuse me as extroverted because I easily create friends wherever I go. I have accepted my ups and downs. It allowed me to live honestly without batting an eye in regards to the opinions of others. Thankfully, God sent me to a safe community in church wherein I was protected and nourished with love. I turned from shy and insecure into someone who is transparent to people.

 

Perhaps I shared too much. I almost stood naked in this post. And if I did, someone would have loved to slap one of my butt cheeks. Although that would always be welcomed. :lol:

 

  Reveal hidden contents

In case you were wondering why I was "chosen" for such acts, here is a fetus pic of me. I think that incident happened a few months after this pic was taken.59e0a93d39516_PhotoNov14113307PM.thumb.jpg.5da6652afa9208fd78ce916b83c0b5a8.jpg

 

Comsie is a master at getting us all to strip ourselves naked. :gikkle:

 

This is because on Imagine (his magazine) he can use the experiences we share to show how much alike we are in so many ways. That, really, the secret lives we live are no secret because there are a multitude that experience these same kinds of 'secret' lives.

 

Your journey through to transparency now shows that you have a light of wisdom to show and that you are willing to show it. You let the bad turn to good in you. You are blessed and heroic to do so. 

 

Like I said in my sad little response, some let it consume them.

 

You were (and are still I would bet) a beautiful child. You were also entrusted with a sacred duty as an alter boy. Those that did what they did to you: "Better a millstone be tied around their neck and cast into the sea than for them to cause one of these least one's to sin." Though I do not recon what happened to you as some sin you did, but it was certainly a hidious sin done against you. You rose above this and turned it into something good!

 

Shine on!

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2 minutes ago, MrM said:

Comsie is a master at getting us all to strip ourselves naked. :gikkle:

 

Beware of Comsie's shadows. You'll be naked before you realize it. :rolleyes:

 

Thank you MrM! :)

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