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964 I Make This Look Easy


About mayday

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    Cool Member

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    old world, upriver
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    reading writing friends

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  1. mayday

    An Occasional Curveball

  2. mayday

    The Acquittal

    This story had me hooked from the start. From the very first scene I wondered what could have happened to make this attorney so relentless, so unforgiving. The flashbacks promised answers and deliver them. It has been fascinating to work on the puzzle of understanding the characters. Whenever I could I reread the chapters and found details I had overlooked. This story bears reading several times. It never gets boring. I also love that it leaves gaps, jumps time and allows the readers to form their own conclusions again and again. Thank you for a great reading experience. I am looking forward to reading more of your stories.
  3. mayday

    Chapter 25

    Great relief! The way you describe her, Kyle sees her and the feelings she instigates in him point to her. Matt's reaction is just loveable. Now Kyle has a chance to quit in a way that satisfies him and lets him concentrate on his life. Thank you! Can't wait for your conclusion...
  4. mayday

    Chapter 24

    You have made everything sound so real and close as if we were in their very heads. These guys are so close and in David they have a model father, almost too wise to be real, yet war wounds cannot be healed by love, friendship and trust alone. You show that with so much empathy and - at least it seems to me - precision. I was taken aback by David's question. It never occurred to me that soldiers, whose job it is to kill, would count their victims. Suddenly each killing becomes its own. The soldiers' inner wounds gape. I have often wondered how soldiers can return to civil life. How you learn not to feel threatened and in danger. How you turn from somebody who has been trained to "concentrate on the job" to learning to live again. What vivid scenes. On a happier note, I was relieved to see that Kyle and Jacob can tease each other and can now afford to be a little less than perfect with each other. Good antidote to the latter part of the chapter. Something in your scenes reminds me of a story I had forgotten. It is quite short: When the war was over the soldier came home. But he had no bread. He saw somebody who had some. So he killed him. You must not kill people, as we all know,, said the judge. Why not asked the soldier.
  5. mayday

    Chapter 22

    This is pointing towards the ending we probably would all like to read. But what about David? Will he be content being father and grandfather to all his sons and grandchildren or have you got other things for him in store, too?
  6. mayday

    Life Redux

    You have made me weep again, with joy at the first and at the beauty of your images in the second. If words can alter the fate of those we love and hold dear yours may have all the power to do so.
  7. mayday

    Chapter 24

    I wish I was a native speaker of English...
  8. mayday

    Chapter 14

    I remember you warned us not to judge. You were only too right, but you gave us Kyle's perspective and so getting Jacob's now is like a shock. I can see his point only too well. But I wonder what can help bring them together now. I am really glad that you have promised us many more chapters.
  9. mayday

    Chapter 4

    I bet you are right about that...
  10. mayday

    Chapter 3

    you're teasing us...
  11. mayday

    Chapter 3

    Of course you are right, no one owns the truth and we do not always get all that happened or are not able to face it. Anyway, you see you have hooked us with your story and the questions it raises...
  12. mayday

    Chapter 3

    You have left me wondering what mistake Kyle's father could have made that was so unforgivable. Somehow I sense that Jacob must have died due to some error of judgement on David's side. But that is only conjecture. The bruises in the earlier chapters indicate that Jacob's father might be violent. It is also easy to blame Jacob's lack of self-worth on him. I guess that Kyle's determination to put a stop to bullying and violence in his job lie there somehow. It hurts to see such a great relationship between father and son go so horribly wrong. I am looking forward to reading how all this plays out... Thank you for sharing!
  13. mayday

    Mendelev's Periodic Table

    So impressed with your rhymes! Do not ask me to understand the ideas - too many gaps of knowledge here.. but I love the way it sounds...
  14. mayday

    The Day After Yesterday

    this hurts... somehow what is happening is so wrong - I feel for these guys
  15. mayday

    Chapter 1

    no need to apologize for flashbacks. And your gaps convince, too. There is no point in spilling all your beans in the first chapter... what would be the point of reading, after all?

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