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Comicality

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Everything posted by Comicality

  1. Just a question...

    <p> Now...this was a comment made about the "Billy Chase" series last night, and I'm not taking any offense to it. I just want to know what you guys think as readers and fans of the series. It has been a long long time, and you guys know how hard I work to keep Billy's life, his attitudes, and his approach to problems that he's never dealt with before as a 15 year old boy, as realistic as possible. He's not an idiot, but he's not a super genius either. Billy is supposed to be your average teenager, trying to navigate life as best as he can. Period. Now, I only have one life experience to draw from, personally. I was a shy kid. Insecure. Boy crazy at times, but I'd like to think that I had some heart in the way that I dealt with things. And I'm constantly trying to instill those values in the characters that I create. But...when I'm busy or exhausted, it does take me a really long time to get new chapters out. And in this 'Netflix Binge' era...I can't ever hope to keep up with the demand of folks looking for an 'ending'. Imagine if someone had bought the first <I>Superman</I> comic book nearly 80 YEARS ago, saying, "When is this story going to be OVER already???" Yikes! Sucks to be that guy! LOL! Anyway, this was the comment: <b>"You know I love your writing, however, are these people intellectually challenged? Can they not make rational decisions or work through anything logically. I know even adults cannot do that a lot of the time. But really, both Billy and Brandon are smart-- why do they make things so hard? I'm getting tired of this dragging out. The whole Jimmy thing is just an irritation that will never end, he lost all credibility. Why do they all use the phone so much when trying solve problems. The face-to-face is so that they cannot just hang-up on you. The short chapters are a killer-- nothing gets done. I'm about willing to pay to get to the end of the story quickly. There are too many stories in progress. How about a schedule of which story get a new chapter next. I really do appreciate you."</b> I doubt this was meant to be mean. It brings up some points that I want to know about. I want to hear from you guys. Everything doesn't have to be positive 100% of the time. Let me know. Is this story going in the wrong direction? Are you aggravated by the pacing? Are things not moving fast enough. I mean, every chapter is just one 24 hour period. One day in the life of a teenage boy. He's 15. Please keep that in mind. Still...it's a fictional story, and it's meant to be entertaining. Not frustrating. So if there's something that <I>truly</I> bothers you to the point of tearing your heart out from week to week, please let me know. Either here or in a private email. I want to hear what you have to say. That does not mean that I'll feel insulted by anything you have to say. Nor does it mean that I'll cave and do things your way instead of mine. Because if you guys knew how to write the perfect story...you'd be writing it yourself. But I'm always interested in what you all have to say. K? You guys KNOW that I always write every word from the heart. These stories are a direct and honest reflection of who I really am as a person. I don't expect to please everybody, but I also don't want my emotions to get in the way of writing a competent story for others to enjoy. Anyway, let me know what you think down below, or send me a private email at Comicality@webtv.net if you don't want your comments to be made public. K? Also, this is JUST about the "Billy Chase" story itself! K? Don't go into attack mode! Hehehe, it's ok. This is someone who's been a faithful reader, and I welcome his input. Just as I do yours. So let's stay focused, k?
  2. Just a question...

    No worries. I had to leave my job and all my friends in Chicago to move down here to Georgia. So no Winter Christmas for me. I'll buy a few beers tomorrow and celebrate just the same. K? ::Missing Home::
  3. Just a question...

    I guess... I'll try harder. ::Shrugs:: People want more. The new stuff I'll be posting this week and next week will just have to be wasted. Who cares, right?
  4. Just a question...

    I always feel like I sound angry and oversensitive about stuff like this. I'm really not. I swear! I just want you guys to understand my side of things. I might write a full section on this for 'Imagine' for April or May of next year (I've been pouring a LOT of new material into that thing! Hehehe!) so folks can get a glimpse of why I do things the way I do. I mean... Ok...think about the clothes in your closet right now. How many shirts do you have? One? Two? If you had to guess...how many shirts would you say you have in there to wear? It's not just one or two, is it? You don't want to wear the same clothes every single day of your life. You don't want somebody constantly telling you, "Why don't you wear the white T-shirt again? And again? And AGAIN?" Because I don't feel like it today. Is that ok with you? Well, the number of stories that I have going on all at once works the same way. Maybe you wake up tomorrow and you decide to wear a red shirt. Maybe you feel like wearing blue. Maybe you decide to wear all black. It depends on how you feel on that particular day. You fill your closet up with a variety of clothes so that you have an open 'choice' depending on how you feel and what you want to wear. The stories are no different. I write what I feel. It's honest. I don't fake it for the sake of pleasing an impatient audience. I please the audience by giving them the truth about who I am and what I'm feeling. I tell stories that relate to what I went through growing up and my understanding of life in general. When I wake up in the morning, depending on my feelings, or the day I've had, or the problems I'm dealing with, or just a horny itch that I want to scratch, hehehe...I have different stories that I can pour those emotions into. I don't write 'happy' stories when I feel like shit. I don't write depressing chapters when I'm feeling goofy and fun. That would be fake, and you guys would be able to tell immediately. I'd much rather have people wait a while longer than post something fake and rushed and written under pressure so everybody can get online and tell everybody how much it sucked. I worked too hard to get the stories where they are to screw it all up now. I don't think that people realize that the very REASON they read my stories and want more is because I'm sooooo emotionally connected to every word that I write. Mistakes and all. But in order to maintain that emotional connection, I have to write the stories *MY* way. I mean...ugh...does that make sense to you all? I can't *DO* this YOUR way! Your way is not what made these stories what they are. And it may be frustrating for you guys to wait, I get that. But this is what it takes for the stories to come out the way they do. This is why you bother to read or care about the stories at all. So, are you going to cheer me on and enjoy the new offerings, or are you going to slow down the process by attempting to control something that you simply CAN'T control. I can't control it either. You can only hurt or anger me by trying to push harder or ask more of me than what is humanly possible. I write every night. Seven days a week. There is no 'eighth' day! This is all I have to give you. I'm sorry, but it's true. I'm not a soulless computer. There's an actual human being on the other side of your laptop screen. I'm not going to force myself to ruin the reputation I spent nearly 20 years building from the ground up just for the sake of rushing to put something lame out there. I just won't. Please stick with me, k? I've written a TON of new stuff! I JUST started posting new chapters every few days. Three in the past week. "Waiting Outside The Lines" is up. "Billy Chase" is up. A new short story called "Photos Lately" is up. ENJOY them! More to come! Check back tomorrow! And Wednesday! And Friday! And Sunday! Give me a chance. I just re-balanced my whole life in the real world to come back and resume my dedication to you guys. I was hoping you'd all be EXCITED about the new stuff getting posted! Not upset. Anyway, thanks again. I hope you guys can understand me on this. All I hear is what people 'want' from me. But they can't enjoy or appreciate what I've just done. I just want people to be fair to me. Remember...if you think this is easy, my chapters usually clock in around 3500 words. (Billy Chase chapters are usually half that) Come up with an idea, and try writing one yourself. Then continue, every week, for a month. See how well you do. Who knows? Maybe you can do it better than I can. Which would be awesome!
  5. Just a question...

    Thanks, you guys, for your input. I can't do any better. I can't expel any more energy, I can't exhaust myself any further, I don't have any more hours in the day. All I can do is keep writing and have you guys choose to come by at your leisure to see what's new. Nobody can FORCE me to write for the site any more than I can force them to comment and review the chapters I put out there for free. So...'give something, get something'. You'dbe surprised how many people forget their half of that very SIMPLE equation. I appreciate the feedback. I just want to make sure that I'm not CRAZY and pissing everybody off with what I do online? I have feelings too. I'm just trying to entertain you...
  6. Chapter 33

    Hehehe, too late. I really do want to hear more about this, though. I didn't include a name though. I just...I don't get it. I'm desperate to understand the frustration. Maybe I'm out of the loop on this one.
  7. This is a question that I've asked from time to time whenever the issue came up in conversation, but I'd like to get a bigger answer from you guys who might not have replied n the past. Might as well add it to the magazine! So here goes: Imagine that someone that you don't have any real feelings for or any relationship...maybe even someone you barely know at all...decided they had the hots for you. They could have picked anybody, but they chose you. And their crush exists whether you return it or not. How does that make you feel? Now don't bother saying, "I'm old and ugly and stupid and no one will ever want me," because that's just not true. Everybody is somebody's dream boy! And pessimism is unattractive, so...focus! Hehehe! If you knew that someone was seriously interested in you, how would you react to that? Does it make you uncomfortable? Do you feel the need to return those feelings? Maybe you like it! It makes for one hell of an ego stroke, doesn't it? Are you shy about it? Do you find a sense of humor about it? Do you rush to tell them you're not interested so they can stop? Or maybe you think it's harmless and keep from mentioning it. Some people are truly <I>flattered</I> by the idea of having someone else find the beauty in who they are. Then again, some people are creeped out by the fact that some stranger might be stroking himself silly to thoughts of you naked every night before bed! There's a wide spectrum of feelings there. I was just interested in your thoughts on this. And remember, we're not talking 'sexual harassment' here. No inappropriate touches or dirty comments, nothing like that. This is just someone that thinks you're really cute, and a good person, and they chose you to be the object of their affections. Let us know what goes through your heart and mind in these situations! Inquiring minds want to know!
  8. Chapter 33

    Well, I'm not sure what the answer would be. Hehehe, if you were writing this series, what would your solution be? Would you mind if I quoted this on the Comicality Café so some other folks could chime in on this? I'm sure they're just as frustrated and angry as you are. But...if you add up every single "Billy" chapter from the very beginning, you're talking about a 14 year old boy who has been dealing with his sexuality for a year and a half. To me, Billy has come a LONG way and matured a lot since that first chapter. But I can't promise to rush and hurry and have him reach adulthood in a three chapter arc. I mean...what part of the story is it that you're looking to hurry up and reach? That happily ever after? I can do that on Wednesday. "Everything turned out great, they talked, made love, and they lived happily ever after." Done. There ya go. You can move on to the next story now. Anyway, let me know if I can quote this post. I'd like to hear some more opinions on this. Just for perspective's sake. K? Thanks for the comments!
  9. A brief moment of adult content in this one. So...buyer beware. Nothing pornographic or anything, but, a little naughty. K?
  10. Imagine Magazine Question For 12/8

    There have been a few times in my life where this has happened, and I wasn't freaked out by it. But it did me feel as though I was on display for that particular person. And sometimes I felt awkward about being too friendly for fear of having it misinterpreted as something else. But I found it flattering. Why feel awkward about it? I had a best friend from when I was younger that I had sex with on a few occasions, which was fun and all...but it ended up being the only thing he wanted to do whenever I came over. It may sound silly now, but I kind of wanted my best friend back. I wanted to play Nintendo and read comic books and watch slasher flicks on VHS. So that infatuation eventually led to the end of our friendship. Not in a bad way, we just grew apart. But that would be the extent of me feeling weird about someone having a crush on me. I guess it falls somewhere between the possibility of hurting them and the possibility of leading them on when I don't mean to. Other than that...you can stare at my ass all you want! Hehehe! I'm proud to have a positive effect on people, even though I might be shy about a lot of things, you never know. I might develop a crush myself. Hehehe! In which case...you should run away! Trust me, I'm no good for you!
  11. Billy 433 is ready!

    Enjoy, folks! Let me know what you think! https://www.gayauthors.org/story/comicality/thesecretlifeofbillychase9/
  12. Chapter 33

    Tuesday - Nothing makes a teenage boy more uncomfortable, more insecure, than yet another red blotch on his face! I sear to GOD, it wasn't there last night! This one is on my forehead, just above left eyebrow. But it's too far over for me to, like...effectively comb my hair over it. What the hell is going on? It doesn't hurt yet, but I saw it in the mirror this morning and I can feel the emerging 'bump' of this newborn zit as it proudly stuck out against the normal color and tone of my skin. Ugh, what the fuck? I BARELY got rid of the last one I had! Where did this one come from? They just come one or two at a time, right? I mean, I was hoping that I could put a screeching halt on this situation getting any worse than it already was. But I just...I don't know HOW! Come ON, puberty! Don't do this to me! I've got a job now. A boyfriend. I've gotta go back to SCHOOL soon! I can't deal with this level of humiliation right now! Not on top of everything else I've got going on. I wanted to CRY! I don't think I ever felt so ugly. I'd rather have a temporary battle with the Chicken Pox than an extended outbreak of zits. I've been using the special stuff that I got to wash my face and keep it clean. Almost every DAY! I swear! So why is this still happening to me? My mom said it would work. Sighhhh...no wonder Brandon wants to go back to Stevie. He's still smooth and cute and super pretty. Me? I feel like some kind of yucky, deformed, monster that crawled out of the swamp and dared to ask him for a date. This whole thing is so stupid. Surprisingly, I didn't hear anything from Jimmy LaPlane this morning. If nothing else, I sort of expected him to hit me up and gloat about his big revelation concerning my boyfriend and his ex. I'm almost sorry that he didn't wallow in it. I wish he would have messaged me so I could tell him to fuck off. Because, innocent or guilty, there was a burning fire growing inside of me and I didn't want to toss that fury in Brandon's direction. I won't allow Jimmy to manipulate me the way he had manipulated Brandon in the past, always trying to keep us from being together. Always trying to keep us from talking. Anybody who has to work THAT hard to destroy somebody else's relationship is a sad and lonely individual. Sick in the head. Someone who could actually ACHIEVE some level of personal satisfaction if he stopped running around destroying the joy and good fortune of the other people around him. But, like I said, Jimmy was a no show today. Lucky for him...believe me. However, while mentally rehearsing what I was going to say to Brandon tonight when I called, I found myself in a gloomy mood for most of the day. One that seemed to be further aggravated by the thought that I would have to call Brandon at all and ask what he's been doing on his Mondays all Summer. Or why he's seeing Stevie behind my back and not mentioning it. It's just...it's something that I shouldn't have to worry about anymore, right? I'm not like Bobby Jinette. I love my boyfriend, and I know my boyfriend loves me, and I'm not going to abuse him simply because I'm feeling a little doubtful bout being the sexiest guy in the room at all times. I refuse to go down that path. But...I'd be lying if I said that it didn't bother me. Immensely. I knew that I should have just casually called him up early in the day so we could talk about it and he could put my emotions at ease. I knew that it would be easier to just get it over with. But every time I built up the energy to dial his number...this anxiety would wash over me. What if it's not as innocent as I'm expecting it to be? What do I do if Brandon tells me something that I don't want to hear? It seems silly, and it took me a few hours to repeatedly push those thoughts aside so I could talk to him with an open mind. But every time I went for my phone...those jittery feelings of anger and resentment would bubble up again and I'd feel the need to calm down again. Don't worry. I did what I had to do. It just took me some time, that's all. In the meantime, however, my sour mood kinda spilled over into other parts of my waking life. Primarily concerning my mom...who was walking around the house like she was about to break out into song at any moment. Was I imagining that? Was she...'happier' than normal? Why? What's going on there? I even asked her, "What are you so happy about?" And she kinda told me something about it being a lovely day outside and she pulled me in for a hug and kissed me on the forehead. She even went grocery shopping to make something special for dinner. She hasn't had that much energy in a long while. Not since before my dad moved away. Maybe I was just upset about the Brandon thing, but that bothered me too. Seriously...what the fuck has her feeling so happy all of a sudden? I wanted to know! She didn't give me an actual answer. Maybe I was being a bit too subtle to force her to tell me what was going on that she didn't feel the need to tell me about. It was like a whole other representation of the Brandon/Stevie thing! Why can't she just say that she's been hanging out with Mr. Franks? Why can't she tell me that? What is it about them going to lunch that is so secret that she feels the need to deceive me about it instead of randomly mentioning it over dinner? You mean to tell me that you haven't been having private lunches with another man between tacos??? Anyway, all that aside...I pushed myself really really hard and FORCED myself to call Brandon tonight. Even if it led to a deep trauma that I might not be ready for...I guess I HAVE to do it. Right? I'd be expected to fucking HATE myself if I didn't rush into this without a plan, right? So...fine. Whatever. FUCK!!! I pushed myself into doing it, and I was shaking so badly that I thought I was going to fucking throw up because of it. I really did. Sorry. I'm just a kid. I'm trying to be an adult about this...but I'm NOT an adult! I'm still learning stuff. Don't fucking HATE me, ok? It hurts... Anyway...I called him. I was trembling so badly that I had to sit on my bedroom floor to keep from shaking myself to pieces. Hearing his voice...it used to bring me such joy. Tonight it brought me nothing but dread. I think Brandon knew that something was wrong. Maybe he could hear it in my voice. Perhaps I hadn't shaken out all the anger and bullshit out of my attitude before calling. Shit...I knew that I should have waited a bit longer instead of feeling so forced into this. Please don't let me fuck this up by being in such a hurry for a bullshit resolution... It's special to me. It's important, you know? Our conversation started off normal enough. Brandon even remembered about us getting together, and he's like, "I was trying HARD to get my dad to friggin' GO somewhere instead of sitting at home and watching TV all day, but he's so damn stubborn. He's got to have a life that exists outside of this house, right? Ugh!" I listened closely. I even joked around a bit, but I don't know if that made things better or worse. "I know you think Brandon is so perfect, but he's not. Don't say I didn't try to tell you so." ​ That's how Jimmy said it. And it was strange how it took so few words to rile me up inside beyond my control, but I worked to choke up on the accusations so I could give Brandon a chance to come clean on his own. Come on, baby...I'm counting on you. I was trying to find a subtle way to guide the conversation towards his Monday activities, but he kept squirming out of it with a joke or a flirtatious comment. So the anxiety kept building, and eventually, I was just like, "Say, I was thinking of going out to the lake this coming Monday. Just to enjoy my day off. It would be cool to have my favorite boy by my side when I go. What do you say?" Expectedly, Brandon says, "Awww, that sounds so sweet. Maybe we can do it on another day? What are you doing on Sunday?" Frustrated, I was like, "I want to go on Monday. That's my day off. Do you want to come with me or not?" Pull it back, Billy. We're giving him a fair chance, remember? He's all like, "Hehehe, Billy...? It's not that I don't want to go, I'm just gonna be a little busy on Monday. That's all." I'm like, "Busy doing what, exactly?" Brandon says, "It's nothing important or anything. I'm just...I've got plans." I'm trying to keep my voice calm, but I immediately answer with, "Plans? What kind of plans? Can I come? Maybe I can help you out." Brandon gave me a fake chuckle, and he's like, "Dude...there are other day in the week. How about I come see you at work and we can have lunch or something?" I said, "I don't want to have lunch on another day. I kinda want to see you on Monday." Then I directly asked him, "Why can't I see you on Monday, Brandon?" He's like, "What is this attitude all about?" I'm like, "No attitude. I just want to know what you're doing on Monday that's so important." Brandon says, "I just told you, it's not important..." Adrenaline pumping. Teeth grinding. I'm starting to pace back and forth in my room now. "Just like yesterday wasn't important?" I say to him. Brandon's like, "I was just taking care of a few things yesterday. That's all." I said, "I thought you said that you were just hanging out doing nothing for most of the day yesterday. Which one was it?" Brandon paused for a moment, and he says, "Billy...I don't like this. What's wrong?" The pressure had been building up for long enough. I gave him the opportunity to come clean, but he didn't take the hint. So...with an aggravated sigh, I asked him, "Brandon...why are you lying to me?" He's like, "Lying? Lying about what? I don't understand what this is about..." Ok, so he didn't want to say what needed to be said? He couldn't just tell me the truth? Fine. Ok. I'll ask. I'll just come right out and ask him. "Did you spend the day with Stevie yesterday?" Misty eyed, more from anger than sadness, I waited for his response. That response came with a long delay. He's like, "You've been spying on me now?" I'm totally like, "That's SO not the issue right now, Brandon. Answer the question." Brandon said, "Billy...there's really no need to get all charged up about this..." I'm like, "So it's true then? You went to spend the day with Stevie yesterday?" It hurt. Oh God, I thought I was prepared to feel what I was feeling, but I really wasn't. It felt like he was taking a power drill to my heart, and I had to stop pacing and sit down on my bed as my legs went weak. He tells me, "It's not what you think, Billy. I went to see Stevie because he needed me. Ok?" I said, "I'll bet." Brandon's like, "Don't do that. Billy, what the hell...?" I asked, "Have you been doing this every Monday? All Summer long? Is this why you and I can't get together as often as we promised we would?" He's just like, "See? I knew you wouldn't be able to handle this. That's why I didn't want to say anything." Shocked, I'm like, "Handle what? You running over to your ex-boyfriend's house to hang out without telling me?" Brandon said, "You would have freaked out about the whole thing if I even mentioned it. You would have gotten all bent out of shape and angry, just like you are now. You don't trust me as much as you pretend to." I'm like, "I'm not bent out of shape because you went to see Stevie, Brandon. I'm bent out of shape because you LIED to me about it. Right to my face. How am I supposed to believe that there's nothing going on when you could have just told me the truth from the very beginning?" Brandon, now starting to get agitated as well, said, "You know what? You have no idea what you're talking about, and we need to let this go before one of us ends up saying something that we regret." That only made my fury burn hotter. So I decided to give him his wish. I said, "You know what? You're right. I'm gonna let this go. You want me to stop talking, I'll stop talking. Lord knows I don't want to say something I'll 'regret' later. Right?" His voice trembling, Brandon said, "Billy...babe, let's not do this. Let's talk, ok?" But I was already shaking with rage. I gave him every opportunity to be honest with me, and he FAILED. So I told him, "We just did. We talked. And you can't tell me the truth, so maybe I should just go before we make things even worse." Brandon sniffled, "Are you gonna at least let me explain..." I hesitated...but only briefly. "Sorry..." I said softly, a sickening nausea rising up in the pit of my stomach. "...Later..." I hung up the phone. Brandon tried to call back twice, and texted me once...trying to get me to talk. But I couldn't. I felt so damaged inside. I thought that I could just call him up and deal with this like an adult. But my emotions can be so involuntary sometimes. If I had continued with that conversation for much longer, it was going to end in a massive fight and possibly another break up. And I don't WANT to break up with Brandon! I want him to be my soul mate! We love each other soooo much! This was supposed to be easy. I shouldn't have hung up on him. That was dumb. I should have talked it out. But...my heart was pounding and my teeth were clenched, and my thoughts were running wild with stupid images and false accusations and Jimmy's pictures of the two of them together. I just felt that conversation quickly going a different way. I would have fucked everything up if I kept talking. I'll get to the bottom of this somehow. I know I will. I just... I love Brandon too much to talk to him when I'm like this. Does that make any sense at all? My dad was trying to warn me about always running away from my problems but...I tried to face this head on, and I couldn't do it. I was failing and falling apart at the seams the second the issue was brought up. I guess I still have some growing up to do, huh? I don't know. I feel so weird about this. I want my Brandon back. I don't want him to think he can get away with lying to my face about stuff like this...but, sighhhh... I miss him already. I'll try again tomorrow. I'll be more calm. This is such a strange game to play. I just want to hug him again and maybe...talk about what this whole thing means. We'll get there. I'm sure of it. I'm just trying to steer my life in the right direction right now. And 'life' seems to be fighting to derail my every attempt to just be HAPPY for a little while. But...I'm ok. I swear. I'm going to work this out. Maybe not tonight...but I'm sure that I can keep my head long enough to solve this problem. I'm not going to let Jimmy LaPlane warp my mind. And I'm not going to let that weasel, Stevie, stick his nose back into our relationship either. Even if it's just as a 'buddy' who lingers around just long enough for a few 'accidents' to happen. Neither one of those ideas sounds good to me. Anyway, I've got a headache. To be honest, I'm feeling a little down at the moment. Brandon is the most amazing boy that I've ever known...and I hurt him. I don't mean to, but I did. I deserve to have that bother me for the rest of the night while I try to go to sleep. I just...do. Gotta run. Later.
  13. LOL! Ahhhh...boyish memories... :P

    Thanks! And no worries. That laptop issue was at the beginning of the year. And donations from the fans fixed it almost immediately! So the last six months have been a true blessing! And that's kept me going! The "Too Cute" post? Did I miss one? Hehehe! I'll check later on tonight! Cool?
  14. First few minutes...takes me back to being that age, and dealing with...ummm...'that'. LOL!
  15. Photos Lately

    Imagine Magazine is still accepting short stories for aspiring authors looking to have their work promoted and showcased for the masses! It's something I truly believe in, and if you're looking to gain a larger fanbase, I want to help! Cool? BIG thanks to those of you who have sent stuff in for the January issue! We've got some really cool stories that surprised me! MasterM is our featured author for January, so interview questions are coming your way soon! And we are always accepting more exclusives from you guys! Add your sites, stories, social media info...and let's make superstars out of you all! As for Imagine Magazine's short stories, I've written a BUNCH of them, to be released once a month, for the rest of 2018! These are the kind of stories that we're looking for: https://www.voy.com/17262/25522.html Cool? Enjoy! Let me know what you think! And if you're interested of adding your two cents in, whenever the muse moves ya...drop me a line at Comicality@webtv.net! This has been MONTHS in the making, so jump in as soon as you can! Now then, the new story! Hehehe, and let me get back to work! https://www.voy.com/15900/1/88874.html
  16. Chapter 30

    THANKS, Lamps! And don't worry! I didn't abandon "Savage Moon", promise! Hehehe! I've been turning the chapters into ebooks and practically rewriting them from scratch to make a better version out of the chapters I have written so far! So I'm just waiting for the rewrites to catch up to the current new material so everything matches up in a decent way! I'm also doing the same with "Gone From Daylight" (Which, if you haven't checked it out yet, it might get you through your "Savage Moon" withdrawal for a while. Hehehe) Anyway, thanks again! The compliments make me giggle and dance and work even FASTER! So look for something new soon. K?
  17. Thank you guys SO much for giving me some breathing room while spending the last 6 weeks or so getting familiar and straightened out with a brand new job, as well as setting up stuff Imagine Magazine in 2018! I sincerely appreciate your patience! Now then, let the festivities begin again! A new "Waiting Outside The Lines" chapter brings Evan back to his sweetheart, Greyson Chance! Check it out, and let me know what you think!!! https://www.gayauthors.org/story/comicality/waitingoutsidethelines/ Enjoy!
  18. Chapter 23

    "Waiting Outside The Lines 23" There's a comfort that you experience in the arms of someone you have feelings of true love for that you can't quite explain, but you recognize it when it surrounds you. It's the kind of safety a small child feels in the arms of his own mother, but more intense. More direct. It goes beyond just the sexual feelings that I felt for Greyson. This was a much deeper connection, a perfect tangle of two kindred spirits finding one another after a long search that we didn't even know was going on until we found our better halves. As our intimate tongue kissing did all it could to keep our youthful trembling down to a minimum, our arms and legs wrapped around one another in an attempt to keep a single pocket of air from existing between our heated bodies in that hotel bed...I allowed that joyful vibration of complete satisfaction cover me from head to toe. I smiled to myself, holding Greyson close and marveling at the erotic feel of his ultra smooth skin. Every inch of him was so unfathomably soft to the touch. It was as if he had no bones at all. Hehehe, I had to struggle to keep from squeezing the breath right out of him sometimes. I loved every sensual minute of our intimate contact. Kisses and whispers and palms gliding over parts of his body that I had only ever touched on myself before now. All while the pounding of my excited heart bounced off of his, our naked chests pressed together, and gentle giggles passing between us as our bodies tried to keep up with our emotions. Not an easy task, but...I couldn't ask for anything more. Greyson was so perfect. Soft moans were traded between us. Involuntary cries of overwhelming affection, muffled by an expressive liplock that nearly left us breathless. But...as I got a mischievous spark in the back of my mind, I held back a bit of a grin...hoping that Greyson wouldn't be able to taste the trick of it on my lips ahead of time. Then, while still kissing, I gently rolled Greyson further on his side, then almost onto his back...using my kiss to distract him for the time being. And as soon as his shoulder touched the mattress again...Greyson suddenly gasped, and his body jerked forward! "Omigod! Cold!" He said. It was too much. I couldn't hold the laughter back as he had rolled right back into the icy wet spot that he had left on the sheets. "Hehehe...Ahem, sorry....hahahaha!!!" Greyson's eyes widened, and he gave me a slap on the shoulder. "You did that on purpose!" He grinned, and it nearly broke my heart in the most playful way when he gave me a pouty look and began to blush furiously at the idea of my minor prank. "Ewwwww! Hehehe, you're wicked. You know that?" "It's your mess." I giggled. "Well, technically, it's housekeeping's mess..." He replied with a wink. "...I'm going to have to explain that somehow." "Just tell them that you spilled one of your many pastry treats on the bed or something." "Hahaha! It's a hotel, Evan. I'm pretty sure they know a big splattering of 'baby-batter' when they see it on their bed sheets." He laughed. "I've got a few quarters if you want to do laundry..." "Oh shut up!" He said, giving my nipple a pinch and making me cringe from the pain of it. But then, he looked into my eyes again, and our smiles softened as he caressed the side of my cheek. "I love everything about you, Evan. You know that, right?" "I feel the same way about you." I told him. "This is...so wild to me, dude. I'm, like...reeling from this whole situation right now." That's when he told me, just above a whisper, "I really mean it when I say that I love you, Evan. Nobody has ever made me feel this way before. It's like I can't breathe." He kissed me on the lips, "I can't help but feel that this is what I've been looking for all along. That this is what love was meant to be like. If I could capture this feeling in the words of a song, it would live on forever. It'd be the greatest song ever written." With my emotions swelling up inside of me, starting in my heart...crushing the air out of my lungs, and then rising up to pulse persistently at the back of my throat...I whimpered, "You have no idea what you're doing to me right now, Greyson..." I kissed him hungrily for a moment, and said, "I love you too. With everything I have to give. Promise." I didn't realize how rock hard I was again until Greyson pulled me on top of him and wrapped his limber legs around my waist again, this time rolling over into the small puddle in the middle of the bed with no problem. I don't think he minded the mess at all anymore. He just wanted me. Just me. It makes me so DIZZY to think that I could be loved so completely by a boy that I could only view on YouTube a few short months ago! "Can you?" He whispered aggressively as I humped my hips on top of him. "Huh...?" "Are you ready? Can we...?" Oh! Hell yes! "I'm ready if you are." I whispered back, and he tongue kissed me with a fever to show his appreciation for the good news. Ok...if my baby wants more...my baby gets more! Hehehe, oh WOW, I love saying that to myself! Just sounds crazy to me! I'd like to say that I had easily gotten hard again at a moment's notice, but to be totally honest, I don't think I ever went limp to begin with. I definitely had a full on, super wet, orgasm inside of my new boyfriend...and while it was a huge relief from the building crescendo that began the moment my mother dropped me off in front of Greyson's hotel, our passionate kisses, our soft touches, our sensual confessions and soft-spoken declarations, kept my hormone driven momentum going strong the entire time we shared our mind-blowing embrace. I doubt that I could have gone limp if I tried. I remember our tongues colliding in this really sexy way... It was so wet...but not in a nasty way. More like a 'pleasingly naughty' way. I could feel y baby's breath on my cheek. I could feel his lithe frame wiggling beneath me, his heels applying pressure on the small of my back as he urged me to hump my hardness urgently against the leaking cradle of his splayed legs. I can just imagine his eager hole tightening and yearning for another penetration. I was almost scared that I'd explode again before I got another shot at it. My emotions were already out of control...but my body was at the mercy of the lustful sensations that Greyson's teen body could provide. He had ways of manipulating my most involuntary sex muscles that I didn't really have any practice with yet. I'm learning fast, believe me! But...even though I hate to admit it...I'm still kind of new at this. Making Greyson happy and leaving him totally satisfied was all that mattered to me. Sure, I was definitely getting my share of good 'feels' out of it too, but...I'd be lying if I said that some of my deepest insecurities didn't worry about being...I don't know...the best that Greyson's ever had. You know? Well, I'm the ONLY boy that Greyson's ever had. But still...I guess it's important for me to have some sort of positive impact here. Something that he can enjoy and be proud of. I want to love him soooooo much! I want him to feel the way that I do right now. And the biggest, most terrifying, series of thoughts in my head right now...are the ones trying to convince me that I might be even slightly 'inadequate'. That would be SO embarrassing! Especially, after getting such a lucky gift from this amazing boy celebrity that basically dropped out of the sky for no other reason than fate decided to give me a shot and wanted to see if I'd make a go for it. "Mmmmm, ok..." Greyson said with a smirk. "...I'm ready." "Now?" "Oh God, yes. Like...right now. Just, stick it back in me. I'm so ready." He sighed. "Ummm...ok!" I said. I think my brain locked up on me for a moment, because my thoughts went blank, and I found myself unable to think of what comes next. "Do you, ummm...wait, ok...do you want to roll over on your stomach again, or...?" Greyson blushed. "Actually, hold on...I mean, if I raise my hips up a bit more, do you think we can do it this way? With me on my back this time?" He bashfully looked way from me with a grin. "I just...I kinda wanna see your face this time. I want to see your eyes. Your eyes are beautiful." Greyson definitely knew how to add about 50 pounds of extra 'weight' to my already overworked heart. But the moment his sexy brown eyes looked up into mine, their honey covered almond glow inviting me with a craving that refused to be denied for a moment longer...I was helpless to keep my paranoid idea of 'sanity' for a moment longer. I can't believe that ANYTHING this amazing hasn't been made illegal yet! "Ok..." I replied. "Ummm...do you want me to put some more 'stuff' on, or...?" Replying to the lubricant Greyson had applied earlier. "Oh. I don't know." He said. He grabbed the bottle and asked, "Do you want to?" "Do I need to?" "I don't know. It did say, 'long lasting'." He told me. "Yeah, but...how long is long lasting?" He thought about it for a second, and then said, "Well, I can always buy more if I need to. Let's put some more on. Just in case." "Ok!" I smiled, and got up on my knees so I could put more of the slippery liquid on my erection. It still feels a little weird, being naked in front of another boy like this. I know that he's my boyfriend and stuff, but...being naked around other people hasn't been a thing for me since my mom was still giving me baths as a kid. And being HARD around another boy is something new entirely. I'm warming up to it, little by little, but...it's a little freaky right now. Greyson put some lube in his hand and then giggled, "You want me to...ummm...?" "I can do it. Or...wait..." "Well, it's no problem if you want me to..." "No. It's ok. Unless...you want to, like...I mean, I won't say no if.." We both found ourselves stuck in the mode of trying to be overly polite and considerate to a fault when addressing the issue. But we looked into each other's eyes and began cracking up. Yeah, we were being a little bit silly about it all, but in a 'fun' way. Just like with everything else. Hahaha! I took the initiative, and said, "I'll put it on myself. K?" Greyson laid back on the mattress, legs spread, and he said, "I'll put some on too." And I watched as he put a healthy dollop of the liquid on his index and middle finger, and then his eyes looked up at the ceiling, his lips pressed together in a moment of concentration as they wandered down to his rose colored pucker...rubbing the gel around the outer ring for a moment before dipping inside. Tentatively at first. Then sinking in with more passion. The way Greyson tilted his head back, closed his eyes, opened his kissable lips, and gasped gently from the stimulation...I was almost jealous that I wasn't a part of his sudden involvement. I watched him finger himself with the lubed up digits and watched Greyson, basically start without me. I can't have that! "Hehehe, having fun?" I said with a raised eyebrow. "Well, to be honest..." He grinned, but welcomed me with open arms when I scooted forward on my knees and leaned over to kiss him on the lips. Then, with his hands clasped around my neck, he stared up at me lovingly for a brief moment. "You're like magic to me, Evan. I love you." He moaned. "I love you too..." I whispered. It was then that Greyson began to reach blindly for my hardness...finding me throbbing and ready as he guided it back to his slickened hole. My tip bumped the wrinkled pucker gently, and with a little less work than it took the first time, the tight ring 'gasped' to allow me inside. The sight of Greyson's strained expression was just about the cutest thing that I had ever seen in my life. He was sighing as I carefully slid into him, half inch by sexy half inch, as he bit his bottom lip and relaxed as much as he could to invite me in to the hilt. As half of my length disappeared into his warmth, his hand released my shaft, his long fingers now tenderly cradling my hanging balls and creating a ticklish sensation that caused me to smile. I sank a little bit deeper. More confident this time. More capable of giving my new boyfriend the intense pleasure that he had earned through his love for me. I think Greyson was right. Having him on his back like this...hearing his soft whimpers, being able to see his eyes, feeling his heated breath on my face...this was a different experience entirely. I might like it this way even better. Greyson's eyes sprung open as I felt his spongy cheeks touch the front of my lap. He wasn't hurt or anything, but he seemed a bit surprised. Almost as if I had opened a door or turned a specific corner within him that he wasn't expect me to reach. I felt his body quivering all around my shaft. I was soooo deep. Already, I found myself trying to hold back from an inevitable orgasm. Feelings that intensified as Greyson took two handfuls of my ass and pulled me even tighter against him. I felt my erection jump inside of him, swelling and pulsing within his fevered tunnel. Greyson's feet were in the air, trying to keep his hips raised up high enough to keep me from slipping out of him. But I didn't want him to tire himself out, so I leaned forward to let him rest his legs on my shoulders. I remember how Asa did it to Chandler, and how it just seemed to make everything look like it would work easier once we got in motion. I even made a few circles with my hips before I got going. Hehehe, Greyson's eyes got even wider as he gave me a huge smile. "Hey there!" He giggled. "What does it feel like?" I asked. "I don't think I have anything to compare it to. It's like...OOF!!! Whoah! Yeah, hehehe, feels like that." He said as I pushed even further in. I slowly withdrew from his clutching hole, and then pushed myself back into him again. Holding still to gauge his reaction. It was priceless. So very priceless. "Keep going..." He said, breathlessly. My humping motions took on a rhythm all their own. There's something evolutionary that just takes over when it comes to sex. The humping and hugging and grinding into a warm spot that feels so good? That's the easy part. I'm glad it came so automatically the way it did. It's the emotional part that makes things scary. Not in a bad way. I just...I got so wrapped up in being in my sweetheart's embrace that I couldn't have concentrated much on the physical act at all. I just wanted him to feel beautiful. To feel loved and cared for. It was that beautiful exchange that made the sex so unbelievably erotic to me. That's what made our time together seem like...as he would put it...magic. There was a sensual friction between Greyson's snuggling hole and the length penetrating him in the most intimate way. A friction that surprised me, considering how slippery he was in there. I nearly lost myself to the very feel of him. Hooking my elbows around the back of his knees as I thrust into him with increasing urgency. Were those his high pitched cries of passion, or mine? It was getting hard to distinguish the two. I was breathing so hard, and yet never got dizzy. Greyson's body was folded in half beneath me and he only held me tighter, silently pleading for more. He surprised me by craning his neck up to kiss me on the lips. Omigod! That's right! Kissing him would be much easier while I was on top of him this way! Why didn't I think of that? I could feel his hardness poking at my underbelly as I put more of my weight on him and smashed my lips against his. Our tongues were immediately reunited, and I continued to hump myself deep inside of him as or kissing flooded us both with an even deeper craving to reach that hidden finish line. I even began to suck on the side of his neck while he crossed his arms across my back and wrapped his legs around me to dig his heels into the small of my back. "Unh...unhh....unhhhh..." His whimpers aroused me to the point where I wasn't sure I'd be able to hold on for much longer. His chute was squeezing me for everything that it was worth, and after a few particularly deep jabs at his special little 'excite button', he began to speak. "Oh God! Right there! Yes! Don't stop! Just keep doing it...just like that...oh wow...mmmm..." I began to push myself into him even harder. I don't know what made me feel so aggressive at that particular moment, but the fact that Greyson got so turned on by it kept me going. He was doing all he could to thrust his hips up in time with my rapid downstrokes...pulling me further into his love. We were too breathless for kisses now. Something else was happening here. Somewhere between a cuddle and a wrestling match...my high pitched moans joined his in the symphony bouncing off the hotel room walls. I couldn't hold that boy tightly enough, my chin over his shoulder as I raced towards a climax...my muscles tightening up involuntarily, waiting for a major blast. Greyson's fingers raked the back of my shoulders, as I continued to press against that magic spot, again and again and again, with every rapid thrust. "Keep going! Omigod...PLEASE keep going! Oh, OH...!!!" I don't think I've ever heard Greyson hit a higher note than the one that he did just a split second before his heated seed began to shoot out of his rose colored tip like the blast from a shotgun! MY wild humping frenzy caused his hardness to bounce and wave all over the place, his boyish nectar splashing in every direction, sloppily being dashed against his constricted stomach muscles and puddling in his shallow navel as he gripped me tightly with both his arms and his legs. I could feel it on my tummy. Greyson's excitement showering me from below while his helpless body writhed and wriggled in my embrace. Inside, his body had suddenly become a chaotic mess of biological panic. One that pulsed and contracted and milked me for a powerful eruption of my own. Greyson's sexy squirming just made me want him even more, and with a few final pushes of my hips, I felt my balls drawing up tight against me, finally firing thick, creamy, shots into Greyson's hole, a fiery retaliation for the release he created. My body wasn't still, and yet it felt frozen in place. The turbulent convulsions in my shaft left me powerless to do much more than to hang on to my lover and ride out the intensity of the situation at hand. Then...calming down after what must have been a massive fire to ten shots of hot semen into his spasming hole...my body attempted to return to normal. My heart pounding, my breath short, a slick sheen of perspiration on my skin...our lips connected again, and I held on to the tingling vibrations for as long as I could before they were gone. This time...I actually did go soft. My wiry frame was shuddering with such a sensual breakdown that my body almost seemed to lose all of its energy at once. Not even Greyson's satisfied tongue kisses could keep me from sliding out of him, and lazily rolling over to the side to recover. Wow...sex is fuckin' AWESOME! I don't know how long we lay there, huffing and puffing, just anchored enough to reality to keep from having an out-of-body experience...but we were totally comfortable with the near silence. Even when we rolled towards one another to stare into each others' eyes for a moment. Everything about this night felt perfect. So very perfect. As Greyson softly caressed my cheek, he said, "I never dreamed that things could be like this." "Like what?" I asked. "I dunno...like...this. You and me. Just...laying here. Close. Affectionate." "Really? I used to dream about this kinda thing all the time." I said. "I mean, more than just having a super cute boyfriend and LOTS of hot, naughty, sex marathons every chance we get. Hehehe! But...you know, the quiet moments too. Just like now." Greyson smiled warmly as he kissed my lips and threaded his fingers through my hair. "I'll be honest, I didn't think I'd ever have any sweet moments like this. I thought that maybe I'd have to settle for something a little less romantic. Then I found you. And you're more than I ever dreamed you'd be." I blushed. "Me? Even more than, you know...whatshisname?" He seemed puzzled. "You know, that Rodney guy?" Greyson's forehead wrinkled up a bit, as if that was the strangest question I could have possibly asked him. Who knows? Maybe it was. "Rodney? From back home? Hehehe, no. Trust me, as big a crush as I had on him at the time, my whole idea of him didn't go too far beyond getting him naked and on top of me. Nothing more significant than that." That's was the topic I was trying to ease myself in to without being too obvious. I probably just said it wrong. "'Back home', huh...?" I mumbled, taking a peek into his eyes before looking away. Again, Greyson wasn't sure what I was getting at. "Evan...?" "Forget it. It's nothing." But he persisted, "Go ahead. Tell me what's on your mind." He kissed me on the cheek and scooted closer. "Whatever it is, it'll be ok." I hesitated for a moment, then said, "I wasn't really eavesdropping or anything, but...did you mean what you said over the phone? To your sister?" Our eyes met again. "Are you really wrapping up your video shoot in a couple of weeks? Are you...ummm...going home to Oklahoma soon?" His expression was genuine. I could tell that he hadn't thought about it much. Maybe not at all. "Oh..." He said softly. "Ummm...yeah. I mean, I have to go home eventually. All my family is there. My friends." It was if my heart was slowly being torn apart, with only a thin layer of denial to keep it from being ripped in two. "Yeah. I get it." I wondered if that meant we only had a short time left to explore this 'thing' we had both fallen into so blindly, causing us to figure it would simply last forever without conflicts or complications. I didn't want to drain all of the love and energy out of the moment, so tried to be hopeful by asking him, "But...you'll go back on tour and stuff though, right? You've got to come to a town near me some time, right?" Greyson gave me a halfhearted smirk. "Sure. I mean, I might. The new album is almost finished, so once I'm done recording, I'll probably tour again." "See?" I grinned. "As soon as you're anywhere near me, I'll be sure to come looking for 'Chance LeGrey' at the closest swanky hotel I can find. I'll make sure you get yourself a good night's rest. Hehehe!" "Yeah..." He said, blankly. "Well, except...I mean do a lot of my touring overseas. My fanbase is bigger over there. I spend a lot of time in Malaysia...and stuff..." "Oh." I replied. "So, how long do your tours usually go on for?" Sadly, he said, "Eight...maybe nine months. It depends." Silence. This one, much less comfortable than the last one. "Oh..." I mumbled under my breath. I didn't say anything else about it. I was barely sure how to begin that conversation, much less end it. But as I interlocked my fingers with Greyson's, rubbing the tip of my nose against his...I just tried to push these hurt feelings and worried thoughts right out of my heart and mind. I'm happy. This is a happy time right now. But I will admit to dreading the possible outcome of falling in love so quickly without knowing more of the details involved. I don't know how to get to friggin' Malaysia! I can't even point that country out on a map if I had to. Not to mention that my beginner's salary for the 'Walking Dead' can barely buy me a bus ticket to Chicago...much less anywhere overseas. But...like I said...this is supposed to be a happy time. For my baby and me. I just hope that the stars above didn't give me the greatest loves of my entire life...only to snatch it away from me just as I was learning to appreciate it. I don't think my heart could take that. Worse...I don't think Greyson's could either.
  19. LOL! Ahhhh...boyish memories... :P

    Lockie Leonard is hard to find. I DID find it once a few years back, but it was on my hard drive, and my laptop broke. So I don't know if I'll ever find it again. Another funny coming of age series that you might wanna check out, though, is Hank Zipzer! I enjoyed that one too!
  20. Imagine Magazine Question #10

    Times change! It's inevitable. And technology changes the way we do things in the world, especially when it comes to interacting with one another. But, narrowing the topic down to one specific subject this time around, let's talk about dating in the 'left swipe/right swipe' age! What are your thoughts on that? I understand that some of you are young and haven't really experienced dating before the cell phone era, and that some of you are older and aren't into that kind of dating now, but we'd love to hear what you think about this as well. Has dating become too 'easy' in this day and age? And does easy mean that it's more superficial? Instead of meeting someone pleasing and funny and trustworthy to go out with, has then been reduced to a series of photos, and someone scrolling through them thinking, 'nope, nope, not cute enough, not tall enough, nope, ooh! He's beautiful!'? What happens to the folks who <I>don't</I> have the rock hard abs, or the 9 inch penis, or the wavy blond hair? And can this substitute for getting to know the people you ask out for a date be dangerous? Does it promote overtly sexual behavior? I mean...sure, you might pick somebody and talk to him first to make sure that he's not a serial killer...but what made you pick that person in the first place? Was it his personality and his charm? Or was it just a hot profile pic and a close proximity to where you live? Dating in the digital can be a brand new place for people to be open and honest about who they are and what they want. Or...it can be a virtual glory hole at your local truck stop, inviting relationships that might be fleeting, or even unsafe. So what do you think about the nature of dating online and with digital apps and the like! Give us your feedback for Imagine Magazine below!
  21. "Love Is All You Need?" Movie

    Sweet! Thanks, Jeff! And yes, it can be heartbreaking in places, but this is what happens. And one of the reasons that the world is like this is because other people think they're NEVER going to be in the same position. They NEVER think they're going to be the odd man out. And it's disgusting. Why do we have to suffer ourselves before we can sympathize with someone else? That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard of. Anyway, I definitely suggest that everyone watch it. Share it. If you get a chance, let the folks that put this movie together know that you liked it. Because we need more films like this. It might just make a difference. Thanks for the link, dude!
  22. "Love Is All You Need?" Movie

    I won't lie, but this movie can be hard to watch in its last 30 to 45 minutes. But I truly think it's worth the discomfort, as it really hammers home the gritty reality of what it is like for a lot of people to be gay in certain parts of this country, and indeed, the world. This movie takes place in what you might call an alternate universe. Where being gay is the standard, and being heterosexual is actually seen as a sin and a disease amongst 'normal' people. This is also a world where religion is SUPER involved in this particular community, and there will be some heavy religion bashing in this movie as well. Just letting our religious Shackers know ahead of time. It surrounds two or three different stories. One is about a female football star (Yes, gender roles have been switched around in this new world, as well), who discovers that she's heterosexual and begins to have a secret love affair with a boy she meets in school. The second story is about a girl in middle school who develops feelings for a boy in her class, and suffers bullying at the hands of his older sister. The third story is about a teacher who is putting on a play of 'Romeo and Julio', but dares to change it to Romeo and Juliette...with a heterosexual couple being the focus of the story. The whole movie, when you watch it, seems really bizarre at first. But I LIKE that! Because it really shows us all how brainwashed we are to believe that life is supposed to work one way and not another. It shouldn't be uncomfortable to think that a girl could play football, or that two people could love one another without it being dirty and wrong, or that people could have two dads and two moms. Why is that so weird? It causes you to ask yourself just how 'programmed' you are. So, very cool. However, as I said, the third act of this movie goes to a very dark and brutal place, but it's realistic. I mean...'truth' right? Anyway, I think it's important for people to see this. Gay and straight and everywhere in between. It's a movie that might shake some people out of their comfort zones and put some deeper thought into what gay teens go through on a day to day basis. The dangers they face, and the prejudices working against them. Check it out! I loved it!
  23. Imagine Magazine Question #10

    My thoughts...I don't think there's anything wrong with it at all, but I'm conflicted, nonetheless... ...I only say this because I am certain that it would drive me crazy on a personal level. Even if I was had over heels in love, I don't think I'd ever be able to truly consider myself 'comfortable' with someone that I met that way. So I'm not sure if it's just me being weird, or if there's a flaw in the culture itself. A close friend of mine once started fooling around with a girl that he knew was somebody else's fiancé. Which...I didn't agree with, but she was into it, and they enjoyed sneaking around, so...not my business, right? Well, the wedding never happened, and they decided to become a couple. Less than a year later, he was heartbroken because she was cheating on him. And all I could think was, "Well...yeah. What did you expect?" As Bobby Jinette says in "Billy Chase"...there is ALWAYS somebody more beautiful, more convenient, or in closer proximity, to the person you're willing to promise your heart and soul to. ALWAYS! I can't tell you how many tears I've shed over the years, simply because some cutie was 'available' when I wasn't. So I have a serious bias. How can I trust someone who can just as easily 'right swipe' somebody to find a quick night of intimacy as they did when they first found me? And vice versa. Growing up, there were people who I absolutely despised for everything they were...but DAMN, were they cute!!! I would have jumped on them in a heartbeat! LOL! In the same respect, there were people that I wasn't originally attracted to at all, but after spending time with them and getting to know them better, I felt like "Why am I not chasing HIM around a dating site? My life would be SO much better if we could date and laugh ourselves silly on a daily basis!" But these are lessons that I learned out of necessity. Over time and through trial and error. And I feel better for it. But...would I have learned about inner beauty and compromise and shared interests...if I could just go to a gallery of hot boys and pick the first one that made me horny? If I could meet up with a guy and have sex...no dinner, no drinks, no movie, no build up? What would be the point? I think I understand now why so many people sometimes get frustrated with the stories I write. Why angst and patience is such a sin. I enjoyed the awkward conversation with a cute boy that I just happened to meet on accident. I enjoyed the flirty suggestions, and the warm blushes, and fidgety hands, and the 'is he or isn't he?' guesses about his sexual preferences. That was always a huge part of the thrill of dating to me. If it was just a matter of picking a hot boy and saying, "Let's meet up and fuck. See you at eight!", it would be hot, and it might even turn into something more if the stars align just right...but it wouldn't make for much of a story later on. "How did you guys meet?" "I clicked on an app, said hello, and his dick look nice, so I went to his house and we traded fluids. The end." I don't know. I'm a hopeless romantic at heart. And a chronic masturbator! LOL! So I don't need to bring other people into my obsessive need to get off. I can do that on my own. But...touch my heart? Consider me sold! Just be gentle with me. I've been hurt before. Anyway, I've been writing a story about this, and I'd love to hear more of your ideas on this topic! Loving what I read so far! And I'm not against this kind of dating at all. I'm JEALOUS that I didn't have this kind of interaction when I was a teenager! If you had told a 14 year old Comsie that I could get a boy from my gym class to jack off for me on his cell phone, I would have fainted and never woken up again! If you wanted to see another guys penis, yo had to be brave enough to peek at them in the boy's shower! LOL! But that little bit of challenge and difficulty made it worthwhile. It wasn't so easy. But when has 'easy' ever really built character? You know?
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