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D.K. Daniels

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About D.K. Daniels

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  1. Entry 39: All Our Little Quirks

    Awha; I guess everyone has a juggling act at one point in time. I do that on a daily basis. I thought that Ross should have an odd hidden talent, and I choose juggling lol. I believe you are right with Emma. She has a hump with Adam and that is going to take a little more than a simple apology for Adam. I always find that the people you consider to be in the background end up becoming your most trusted allies. Even more so than your best friends; I assume this show's up Eli's character for the real person he is; even though he may be a little rough about it. I know it sad to contemplate the ending in sight but it is the memories that the boys will have that will be forever treasured. The story won't be coming to an end; only the younger years of the boys. I do plan to revisit the story int he future as Adam tracks down Ross after twenty years. I can only wonder what the memories will do when they come face to face after all those years. Thanks for the comment and sticking with me
  2. Entry 39: All Our Little Quirks

    Thank you; I am glad that you are enjoying each new addition far superior to the last. Thanks for your comment.
  3. Entry 39: All Our Little Quirks

    Its all about growing together in a short timeframe now. I finding it a challenge to piece all the things together since there is only a couple of days left and I wish to make them as memorable as possible. I am delighted and truly grateful that everyone has enjoyed and stuck with the story. I guess only time will tell what Ross will return to when he has to go back home. It could be something I'll address in the future; as for now, I'm unsure because I haven't thought ahead that far lol. As for Emma, I think it is something that I will leave open with conflict; sometimes in life, not everything is sorted.
  4. Entry 39: All Our Little Quirks

    A message from Adam; "I am not a drama queen. It's just she is being really stupid and I have tried saying sorry and... well yeah, she is all bitchy about it. Is it really true that only girls get that way? I know some boys from my school and they are worse than the girls. I know this guy called Paul and he is the biggest wuss in the entire world. He is afraid of bees and spiders and... just before school gave out he tripped and moaned about it for the entire day. Glad I'm not that big of a drama queen." Awha yes perhaps I feel that Adam is a drama queen. Either that or I was really feeling the annoyance with Emma during writing. I know people like this and they are certainly not worth the time and energy. It is best to turn negative energy into some product because nothing is achieved from negative... unless it is used in a positive way. I am sorry that a sadness has bestowed you. I do feel a contentment in writing this story and when it ends I'll be at a loss as to what to do without it. I do intend to write another two additions to the story so perhaps that will fill the mystery as to what happened to the boys and give you some more time immersed in the world. I have many ideas for new stories so perhaps with As They Say coming to a close you'll find another one of my future stories to your liking. I intend to release a large-scale serial in the coming months so that might be up your alley. As for the physical contact of another, it is true; once passion works it way in its an entirely different ball game. The simple things become a ritual habit with no real amusement. When I sat out to write I wanted memorable scenes and I hope I have done that in some shape or form; I hope that when my readers leave they will remember the most important bits; as much as the boys would remember the fond memory.
  5. Entry 39: All Our Little Quirks

    14th July 1991 As expected I haven't budged all that much today. My legs have been confined to an assortment of spaghetti. I never thought that yesterday would've been so physically enduring. I imagined that when I came down yesterday. This would be it, and everything would be okay. Evidently when I woke up this morning the pain in the back of my legs was unreal. I suppose I am a little out of shape, though then again when you compare a straightforward climb or running up the mountain, I surmise that's not a fair comparison. I did, nevertheless, manage to crawl out of bed groggy and sore all over. I needed to take Ross to see the Sunday market. I don't believe he was ever to it and I doubt his grandparents had taken him previously. Therefore, I made it my business to get up and take him. The Sunday market is a spring up venue that happens once a month on the last Sunday of the month. In all fairness, it had been years since I'd been there. The fair is not my thing. Still, they do make some homemade candy, and they often hand out freebies, so when sweets are concerned you can count me in no matter how dreadfully, painfully dull the experience might be. Furthermore, if the liveliness was boring then at least, I had Ross by my side to make everything that more durable. Following yesterday I have this uncontrollable excitability to everything I'm doing. It's like I'm crazy in love or something. I'm so god damn happy when I'm making toast, sitting on the toilet, and talking to Ross... Not that Ross in any way is impartial to sitting on the toilet. But argh…. I exhibited crazy. Not a bad crazy, it's like an electricity inside of me. No matter what I had to do for the day, everything was spontaneously made great by reflecting my meeting with Ross. I have no idea how he does it; he is not even around sometimes, and he manages to make my day run efficiently and smoothly. Plus anytime he does cross my mind I can't help but smile. I guarantee shortly after dinner when I was washing the dishes that I resembled maniacal. I must've been grinning so hard that my mother asked me while she was cleaning and I was drying, "are you, okay honey?" And all I could do was nod… aw… sigh. Oh yeah regarding the market; I believe Ross liked it. On the contrary, I enjoyed it too. I wasn't sure what I was expecting when I said let's go to the fair. Admittedly, I could've considered a more equivalent enjoyable pastime to take up. Only it was nice getting out. It was pleasing seeing all the familiar faces, the atmosphere, and experiencing the friendly vibe of the entire town folk. Having Ross right beside me for the whole of the day gave a superb feeling. Ross chose to browse because it took us a full hour just to get through the food stalls. Not that I had any problem with this, but he stopped up every single booth. Something about how he observed all the offerings and inhaled the sweet heavenly smell of chocolate and whatnot made me realise honestly what a wonderful human being Ross is. The funny ideal of it all is that Ross does not try to be anything he is not. Ross remains himself, and that's how I love him. I would never ask him to change; if he did, I'd be distraught. On a few of occasions, he urged me if I wanted to try the candied preservative's and of course being the blubbering idiot I am considering I can't say no when Ross is about. I blatantly agreed to eat Liquorice. Mind you the red candied Liquorice is tasty. Ross wanted me to try the black and god I will never understand why people would eat the black. Thank god when the two of us ate the black the two of us didn't like it. We quickly excused ourselves and spat out the remains into a nearby been. The both of us immediately chuckled at the show of no fucks given. If there is one thing, I've come to notice it is that the both of us have grown extremely comfortable with each other. I would've in the past, spat out the entire mouthful worth of anything. I would've been a little sceptical as even to do that in the first place, considering I was trying to make an impression. Only it didn't appear that way when I did it today with Ross. It seemed harmless and relaxed. Everything that we did today was laid-back, and I savoured that. When we got back from town Ross left it until the very last minute to tell me that his granddad had asked him to paint the inside of the shed. Now I would've postponed my plans if I had known that Ross had chores to do. I thought it was cute all the same that he put all that on the back burner just to spend time with me. That has got to mean something right? Anyway, as I was saying... stuff kind of happened again. And by stuff, I mean we… Fooled around again. I mean I didn't see it coming… No that's not a pun. Seriously Ross is spontaneous like this. I offered to help him figuring that four hands and two people are better than one person and two hands. That by the time we'd finished we would still be able to hang out for a little bit. We did get finished; only it took quite a long to wash in the shower afterwards because I was covered in paint. I mean there was a good proportion of colour all over my body. I think the worst of the tar-like substance was coated all over my hair. And I'm not in the mood to recount that particular scenario because I was scrubbing in the shower for a long time I will tell you that much. Ross and I got changed into a pair of old clothes and then the both for set out to decorate. At first, it was all serious. I was set about trying to finish the task at hand as quick as possible and as sufficiently. When I glanced across at Ross, he seemed to be rooted in thought though he was still carried away with the brushing. Eventually, it got to the point that the two of us started cracking some jokes to break the monotony of the silence. Someplace between us breaking jokes Ross made a sexual joke and display with the stroke of a brush. He sensually let his knees waver and give way, and it gave a sexual kind of aura as he brushed up and down with each stroke of the paintbrush. Of course, it wouldn't take a genius to amount what happened to me. The site in front of me most undoubtedly captivating. It didn't take much to arouse me when Ross is concerned. Only I assume Ross has come to notice this little minuscule detail. Therefore perhaps he did it in a way to tease me and the teasing of the entire moment made me horny. I mean would you blame me if he was making a sexually submissive show. Though, I'm still not sure if it was implied as a joke. There is a possibility that what was employed as a joke and what led on after was our own doing. Because trying to be as playfully enticing as Ross was like; I dipped the edge of my brush in the paint and smeared it across his nose. Ross immediately grew volatile; you should've seen the cheeky leer and grin he had to his character. It was like he was waiting for me to act on something and I guess I pressed all the right buttons. The two of us ended up in some paint war. Mind you we didn't waste a whole lot of paint, but still, his granddad was a little annoyed the with us afterwards. The two of us began swiping each other with the tip or painting devices and then eventually we dropped the brushes and started using our hands. I'd dipped my fingers into the vat of paint and then smear it across his face and into his clothes, and he was doing the same to me. Ultimately, we started the cling out of one another and then that's when I initiated a kiss. Everything that had occurred momentarily merely came to a complete, abrupt standstill. Ross stood there, peeped down at his clothes and then reverted his attention up to me. That gorgeous smile bestowed on his face, and then a hearty chuckle followed. All I could do was sigh at how beautiful his smile is/was and that laughter of his turned into a giggle. I felt entrapped in another world. And even if I wanted to escape and run away for fear of being recaptured I don't think I would have also moved if I wanted to. I'd be like a seal laying on a rock not budging because everything is so subtly perfect. Inevitably his radiant chuckle trickled to a stop and then the both of us reverted to a stillness. It was so still that the both of us could hear each other's erratic breeding from the boisterous behaviour seconds before. "You're a mess...," I brazenly said. Ross's face was covered in white paint. The only thing I could make out was his two eyes and clumps of his chalked hair. Ross locked eyes with me and intensely observed me. I was petrified to move considering he had such a chokehold on me without actually having to touch me. Then like that Ross pivoted his head back toward one of the empty stable areas and then back to me. He interlocked his hand with mine and started to lead me to where he wanted me to go. Like that, I was powerless to resist. All I could do was follow. Let's say that what I had thought would have never happened today, happened. Ironically Ross held me down there. As did I, although it was a whole new approach to what we had already done. And of all places, I don't think I'll ever figure out why we decided to stay in the garage to do it. I recall a part of the experience was due to the fear of getting caught. I will not lie there was an airy mystic coolness to the atmosphere. It was as if what if someone walked by right now and they are only a brick wall between our naughty deed as to their subconscious stroll. Squeezing my hand gently Ross guided me to the same stable that I had been in a while back. From their, Ross pulled me into the darkness and shut the door behind him. Right... there wasn't much light, but the bar of the crepuscular sun coming through the slip in the frame gave us enough light to make out where the both of us where. I could see his face; it was shrouded in darkness. Only the softness of his cheeks came through and the glassiness of his eyes. Everything fell silent until eventually, I felt the same process of elimination from Ross's behalf. He rubbed the front of me as he did in the room the other day and I immediately got harder in an instance. I have no idea what changed so quickly as to amount to us hiding in the horse stable doing what we were doing. Except I didn't care what brought us to that conclusion; because I was enjoying the sensation of Ross's palm rubbing my crotch. Ironically the two of us couldn't contain ourselves, so we re-enacted the entire process. Everything got hot and heavy rather quickly till the both of us were holding our dicks in our hands. The both of us became bashful at how quickly it had all amounted and the both of us reverted to gazing at each other and masturbating at the sight in front of us. The exposure was erotic; how Ross would let a slight whimper of excitement come from his securely sealed lips; or the faint sigh of pleasure. The intensified seclusion blanketed us in a warm embrace. With the stroking and steamy visage in front of me, I felt like I got a tingle that shot from my dick to my brain and suddenly I had the overwhelming urge to kiss Ross. Like that I dove in; like a bomber would freefall and pressed our lips together. A sinking feeling presented itself in my chest and made me internally happy. Not realising what I was doing exactly I reached out subconsciously and took Ross's penis in my hand. Its soft velvet cover was a gratifying sensation in my hand. I enclosed my palm around it and began to apply a deliberate and sensual up-and-down motion. The moment was reappreciated when Ross worked his way to my hardness and began to fondle me with a light grasp. His touch was electric and ambiguously delightful. There were so many wild and raw sensations and emotions running rampant in my head at that point that I had wholly dropped whatever reality remained on its head. All I could focus on was his breathing and the euphoria exhilaration between my legs. It was at that moment that the two of us began to get a little more hands-on. Something shifted in the air about what we were doing, and it was more intimate. Before I knew what was what, the two of us were holding each other up. I let my left hand draped loosely on Ross's shoulder; likewise, Ross hung his left arm over mine. I masturbated with my right, and when the two of us reached the point of no return, we both bow our heads toward each other. Everything about the time was perfect, the sound, the texture of his hardness, the hot, ragged escapes of air, then finally the finale. I don't believe I've ever cum so hard. For a moment afterwards I was lightheaded, and whatever energy I did have left, it was zapped out of me. The two of us stood there giggling for a second as we regained our composure and cleaned away any of the evidence of what had happened. As with the time before Ross and I, we reverted to our usual ways and spoke nothing of what had happened to each other. Although secretly the both of us would give sly glances indicating what we had just done didn't go unnoticed, though to say something directly about it, it hasn't happened yet. Anyhow, I think that's all that is what noting for today. I said I'd help my dad around the house for a little bit tomorrow before heading out with Ross. I know I would love to spend every waking moment with him, but I can't precisely ditch my house chores at the moment. Plus it's not fair seeing my dad struggling to do a two-man job when there is only himself around to do it. So, night – Adam. 15th July 1991 I still can't believe Emma is ignoring me; that bitch needs to sort herself out… okay well, that came out of nowhere… I'm sorry… She's so personal, and I can't help but take it to heart when she doesn't even hear me out for an honest mistake. I have attempted three times to mend the wound with her, and she won't have any of it. Anytime I turn up at Eli's she scampers off and doesn't return for my duration. What I did: was it that bad for to warrant such an ignorant response from her. She could at least try and hear me out instead she's stubborn about the whole thing. I think my patience now at this point is bearing then. Any energy I did have to try and fix the problem is now turning into aloof energy that doesn't appear to care about the issue anymore. I mean why should I fix a bickering that is never going to be set when the other party won't even hear you out. At this point, my tolerance level for any niggling that should be sorted is testing my self-control. Mind you know I thought I did have a reasonable amount of control over my emotional support mainframe. Nevertheless, with all the shit that's going on here, I feel like I want to explode and that whatever heated exchange of words leaks out leaks. I mean I have been honest with Emma; I have apologised numerous times, and all I get for my effort is a grunt and a fluttering of the eye or maybe a little face of disgust. I tell you this much it's not precisely exhilarating from my end. I presumed I would've been able to trust her to be mature. I mean she didn't just let me down by not turning up for Ross's birthday, plus not hearing me out, and furthermore I thought she would have understood what I said at the lake, but apparently, it went in one ear and out the other. The reason I'm mentioning this now of all days is that I ended up stopping by Eli's with Ross around lunch to see if he wanted to meet up or do anything. Of course, while I was there, I ran into Miss Fucking Bonanza. She believes she's more superior than everybody else. When you realistically think about it, she's a farm girl. I know it's mean when I put it like that but I'm getting grouchy at this point because it's ridiculous that in this day and age since we've known each other for so long that she won't accept a fucking apology. Anyway, I promised myself before I'd sit down to write this that I wouldn't harbour on about her and ironically that's what I've done. Never mind let's move on from this I guess she doesn't want to know me anymore so I should attempt to get on with it. But that is going to be a little bit of a predicament considering I'm still friends with her brother. Anyhow as I was saying when I got up this morning, I did the chores that I said I'd do with my dad and then I knocked in for Ross. It was like he was waiting for me again to show up. I remember when we first started becoming friends that he would be already dressed and fully alert when I knocked early in the morning. Then again this was around 11 AM, so I suppose most of the country would've been awake. I guess I operate in a different functioning time zone like most other humans. I mean there can be days that I do nothing but sleep all the way up to lunch, and then another day I wake up at 6 AM. What's up with that? It's funny how no day is ever the same. I’m either groggy the one and an exuberant the next, but hey that's me. We decided that we'd head over to Eli, of course, like I mentioned and see if he wanted to hang out with us. I ran into Emma at the bottom of their drive, and she entirely acted all stubborn and sarcastic toward me, the worst part was it was in front of Ross. All he could do was stand there like a dull tool and observe because he didn't exactly know how to handle it himself. I was more annoyed at the fact that she treated me that way in the presence of Ross. I mean I would've been able to handle it if Ross wasn't with me, I don't imagine I would have cared regardless of the matter if he wasn't there. Though as one of the unlikeliest of scenarios, Ross was there for the showdown between Emma and I. I suppose from afar it looked a little bit cold and detached. I'm not trying to be unfriendly or callous or anything like that. It's just Emma is a hard person to talk to at the moment. Perhaps she will be this way for the rest of eternity, which I don't care all that much for because from the very start she has been a pain in my balls. We said a couple of heated words, and then the two of us brushed past each other and carried on with what we had set out to do. She left her house, and I marched up the driveway with Ross in toe to knock for Eli. The first thing out of Eli's mouth was, "did you bump into my sister?" With a nod, I confirmed his question. Eli said, "yeah I hope it wasn't too bad. She's in a real cranky mood today." Unlike that, he invited us in. We sat in the small nook under the stairs, and Eli brought us drinks. Only this time he wasn't as nearly as long as he was the first time that he did this for me. Eli said that his sister had had her period. At the time he said it I did not need to know that sort of information because it's disgusting. He could've just left it at yeah... No problem she is just cranky. But no, it got much worse than that because now all I can think of when Emma's name comes to mind is that all she is offering to the world today is blood and sarcastic one-liners. I'm not trying to be derogatory or anything here. I mean that's my observation of her today. Mind you I have heard that the experience is supposed to be very painful for women. I'm not that accustomed to the process, but all I know is that when my mam used to get them, she'd go nuts. Thankfully boys don't have to endure that amount of pain. I don't know what I'd do if I had this uncontrollable pain in the base of my nuts; and once a month at that too. So, when we finished talking about the menstruation process, which I have no idea how or why it was needed. We decided to go down to the GAA grounds and play some football. It was a refreshing day away from all the drama. I can already tell that I'm going to miss the soft mutual feeling. I can't explain it all that much, but it lingers in the air when everyone is together. Possibly it stays when Ross is around; it gives a sense of sunny nostalgia to our meetings. It adds warmth, texture and colour to our conversations. It's like a security blanket; only it's not needed for protection, it's beneficial. I assume when Ross leaves that unique perception that presents itself anytime he is around will be gone. For the most part, we kicked the football around and enjoyed ourselves. The last week or so I haven't had as much one-on-one time Ross. In some shape or way, everyone has wanted to be in his company including me. Anyway, as I was saying, we played kick about for nearly an hour in the afternoon sun. There was a time when all three of us was each man of our own; then we'd change it up and alter the progression of the game. At one point it was Eli and me against Ross, and you know what Ross is a pretty good tackler. Although from what I seem to notice his aim is not very good. But that's not something I would class as a bad thing because I still love him all the same. I don't know how quite to explain what Ross means to me. I know I love him; you know like your best friend, and you have that particular vibe you only get from a good friend. Yeah well… that vibe, except it, seems to be stronger. Everything I want to do with Ross makes me feel wonderful, adventurous and that I could take on any ridiculous scenario in a video game. Eventually, all three of us grew tired, and we sat for a little bit on the grass to catch our breath and regain stamina. While we were seated, we chatted amongst ourselves. The conversation shifted from topic to topic. However, I increasingly liked one discussion when Eli asked, "if your life had a team song, what would it be? and why?" When Ross came back and said, “The Simpsons song…" all three of us took a moment of silence to recall how the theme went and then we began to snicker. When Eli asked me I stated, “I don’t know…” The funny part of the situation is that Eli blurted out, “yours is the Murder She Wrote theme.” All I could do was smirk at the joke; though I took it personally I don’t know why and I sternly rebuked… “fuck off…” and then started laughing. There were no foul and stale disputes. Everything appeared fresh and in good humour. I found it funny that Eli called me boring by using a song from a tv show later in the day. After about an hour or so of discussing various topics, we concluded that we were a little peckish. Of course, when it comes to real food for boys our age what is considered normal and acceptable food by our parents turns into a trip to the sweetshop when we are hungry. Eli had some money on him, and we each bought something that we'd all like to have and then left the shop. We decided that we'd head back towards Eli's house and when we were about halfway there the idea loomed that we could go to the hill in the O'Neill's field. The concept was made clear, and everyone agreed, firstly Eli wanted to get rid of his ball. So we decided to take the quickest optimum route back to Eli's house. The walk along the deserted backroads never seemed so short in all my years. The pleasant conversation, playful antics and banter kept life in the gathering. It was great to see that no hard feelings were lagging with Eli and I and that Ross was laughing so much that I don't think he could get any happier. Dropping his football off Eli tossed it over his garden wall, and we all turned off at the next switchback road and walked the dusty gravel drive. We snailed down the gravelled path past many gates that led into numerous fields, of which were separated by a gully and mound of earth each side of the trail. After a bit of a stroll we turned back out onto the main road, and the O'Neill's field was on our right. Momentarily we stopped at the gate and observed to make sure that there were no bulls in the area and proceeded to hop the fence. The was cattle a ways off the two fields over what the distance but we didn't see any cause for alarm. From there we trudged the distance to the hill and clambered up. After all of that we were slightly spent, so we plopped down harshly, and like that I let myself drop abruptly, and my tailbone hit the hard earth, and a surge of pain surged in my body. Eli immediately started laughing, and Ross looked over at me in alarm. I gave him the signal that I was okay, and then I recalled that day when Ross was here alone, and I had sat down violently, and he came to my aid. Maybe Ross does not like to see me get hurt, aw... that is sweet. Everything was fine, and the ambience was brilliant. I was worry free and relishing the sun. I even lay down to take in the rays and listen to the gentle wisp of the wind, the faint rustle of the trees and a nearby bird communicating with its fellow companions. The stillness was delightful. We all did our own thing; Ross remained sitting up with an arm on his knee, staring off into the field, and Eli resorted to making a musical instrument with his hands, from a large blade of grass and his mouth. Eli has done it on more than one occasion. You know where you place a large thick piece of grass between your two thumbs, yeah that. Anyhow so he resorted to making that sound occasionally when it would work with him, others not so much. I began to drift off from the peacefulness of the entire experience. I was immersed in the visceral solitude, not even the nearby rook that was crowing was enough to rouse me. That was until Eli began talking again. I wasn't paying attention at first. I was trying to zone out to the conversation, but eventually, it seemed that it was something worth hearing. Like that, I used my arm as a sun shield, opened my eyes partially to make out Ross sitting beside me. The exposure to the bright radiation made my vision obscured with an opaque green tint. Though all the same I could still make it Ross who was intently listening to what Eli had to say. I remained in my reclined position and alerted the boys that I was joining in on the conversation. And just like that, the discussion continued. Eli said, "you know Ross it was nice getting to know you... You're sound man." Although I couldn't see Eli I could hear him all that perfectly clear. He took a second before continuing and then mumbled out, "Em… Adam's lucky... I mean both of you guys are lucky... To have found each other." The topic of discussion dwindled and trickled to a halt, and I set up from my reclined position and shot my attention over at Eli in disbelief. I was nervous about the conclusion he was trying to draw. Did Eli finally make out what was going on between me and Ross. My heart was running rampant in my chest, and all I could think of was oh god. If I was sweating at the time it was beginning to turn to a cold sweat from fear. I don't think I was quite ready to hear such a statement coming from one of my friends. Though given that I had told Eli that I was interested in someone else he must've put two and two together because I don't think Eli stupid. It's even more worrisome that he actually does know now. I mean what happens if we ever have a fight in the future and I'm still in the closet and he outs me. I wouldn't say that that would be Eli's primary motivation. On the off chance that it could happen I'd say it would be a small chance of it ever happening considering he has never divulged any secrets I have ever told him before. Any time we've ever been in an argument he has never said anything that I have shared with him in secret. The three of us persisted quietly, and the seclusion was pulled in around us. It was like as if time had entirely come to a standstill and Ross and I was the centre of the attention. I looked across at Eli hoping that whatever he was going to say next wouldn't destroy my reputation or work me into a frenzy. He seemed to be having trouble trying to find the right words because he stopped and then started, likewise, he began again and then halted. "I just want to say…," He nervously ushered. “It’s… It's okay to be not like the rest... Normal... What's normal," he chuckled. The relief I felt after that had left his mouth brought comfort to me that I'll never truly understand. Whatever the source of such material originated from I'll never know. Only it sounded poetic to my ears at the time, deep even because Eli does not want to speak consciously out of turn on something like that. It is a little worrisome contemplating all the different aspects and the difficulty ratio of what would happen if anyone else found out but for the most part, I'm unusually calm about such a situation. I just returned my attention to the visage of the village in the distance. Ross was as quiet as a mouse. Then when the silence had grown on me, I just shifted my attention back to Eli and gave him a smirk. That was all that was mentioned. It's admirable that he took such a daringly leap without me having to get all awkward about it. When we decided to leave, all three of us got up and ambled down the hill toward the gate. The cattle that were in the field had gotten substantially closer. That was when I noticed a bull. Now you'd think I'd be scared shitless considering a beast was in proximity. Except I was more calm and rational than the boys. Ross was the one that noticed it, he said, "that does not look like a cow." When I asked him to point out what he was talking about, I looked around to my side, and sure enough, it was a big black bull. Now the animal was minding its own business, and it would occasionally glance up at us. But if we didn't panic and walked at a leisurely pace toward the gate, it wouldn't alert it. I distinctively told Ross not to run; however, he did just that. I've never been so petrified in all my life. I mean Eli could follow that simple demonstration, only the second I told Ross not to run he took off for his life. Then of course when I peered back around at the bull, the bull was beginning to charge. All I knew was that I didn't want to be gorged to death so in a panic I started sprinting as hard as I could. Eli was right next to me, of course, he wasn't stupid he wasn't waiting around for a bull to kill him. We made it to the gate, and all three of us hopped over it without any real problems or getting trampled. It appeared like a reasonable thing to do at the time, but after that near-death encounter, everyone started laughing and giggling. I don't think it was funny in any way shape or form. It was more or less the fact that we hopped the fence before the bull could even get near us. Then again, I haven't seen a beast in that field for years, so I'm not going back in there for a while. Later that evening we parted ways, and Eli seemed to be genuine in his approach. Ross and I were somehow comforted by the fact that Eli had accepted us no questions asked. It's rather bizarre because I thought it would have been an exemplary notion to learn about coming out. Perhaps my ideals are wrong; considering that any time someone comes out, they are always scolded for being that way. Oddly Eli reacted the opposite, and I'm not sure of what I'm supposed to make of it. It's lovely of course but the most prominent hurdle, of course, is going to be my parents if I ever have to tell them, but if I can get away with it I don't think I'll ever tell them. Ross and I didn't want to split up just yet considering we only had a limited amount of time left in each other’s company we decide to make most of it. We ended up back at my house in the garage. I resorted to continuing my railcar model while Ross yapped on about other matters. I even found out that Ross can juggle. I know it seems like an odd talent now that I think of it but I found it amusing at the time. When he stated that he could, I challenged him. So, I intentionally left him in the shed, and I went to get apples. When I came back, I handed them to him and asked him to perform the trick. Of course, he got all bashful and shy about it and said that he shouldn't. I, however, insisted that he had to show me how he juggled. Eventually, I got Ross to relent which was cute to see that he has a pressure point. If you keep nagging and nagging and nagging, he will finally give in. The first time he started juggling he tried it with two apples so that he could get into the swing of things. Ross said that he hadn't done this in a long time, so he said he needed the practice. I was like yeah right… you said you could juggle you've got to juggle. It took him a couple of tries to get three apples going at the same time, and then eventually he got four operating, and then I threw in the fifth apple. It was funny to see him struggle trying to watch all the apples going at the same time. I, of course, had to be evil, and I tossed in a sixth apple and then he lost it. All the momentum that he had built up plummeted to the ground, and Ross let out a sigh of relief. He was trying hard to keep all the apples going one time. Anyhow, I think today turned out pretty well. Ross seems happy, and I found out a new thing that he can do. And on the contrary, I feel lighter about the whole situation with Eli. The sudden notion of Ross leaving has hit me again. I think I'm going to leave it at this for the night. I'm going to crawl up into bed and practice what it feels like to be lonely. Night – Adam. The End Of Entry 39
  6. Prologue

    Why thank you. I am delighted that the feedback is encouraging you to keep on writing. It's good to see that I possibly noted the snake thing along with the murky water at the end of the prologue. It was a nice but sad compassion to make. Of course, I would totally use the snake bit again. I am glad that you are enjoying my story, As They Say, it is my first major story for GayAuthors. I have quite a few others on Nifty and so forth. I am sure I will enjoy your tale; I hope you are still enjoying mine. I on that last push of finishing it but finding the determination is meh...
  7. Prologue

    You have certainly gotten my attention. The imagery in the prologue is quite special. As I was reading along I was secretly admiring the wording, the constant flow and how you painted the picture of innocence. I loved the concept of the snake in the story; I hope you use that as an inkling in the future for the story. Keep up the great work I'll be following along when I get my chance to read in-between my own writing lol.
  8. Entry 38: Loving Him

    I glad that you enjoyed the trading of the stone. I enjoyed writing that part of myself. I have been waiting for a couple of entries to write it lol. Now that I wrote it I'm unsure of what to do now that I wrote it lol. Yeah, I guess you could feel sorry for Thomas seeing how Adam and Ross may be. I guess that would hurt anyone but true "as they say..." that's life.
  9. Entry 38: Loving Him

    Thank you so much @frigidjason; the most integral part of the chapter was the idea of keeping a memory. I hope it sank in. I guarantee if I was in love and someone gave me something that had value for the both of us on top of a mountain with striking views would make me go weak at the knees.
  10. Entry 38: Loving Him

    I know I felt a little bad interrupting the boys with what sounded like a good day out. Though I couldn't help it; I felt morally evil, however, I think in the long run the climb turned into something that Ross and Adam will never forget. I am sure they will find some personal time to sit down and talk things out a little before they part ways.
  11. Entry 38: Loving Him

    Hopefully, when I am finished I will be able to go back and correct the majority of the mistakes before adapting it into an ebook with a collection of letters after the boys parted ways and a novella of the present day Adam trying to track down Ross. That's great to here I love venturing outdoors when I get the chance to do so; my story Even If We Tried is set in Spokane; that's a funny notion lol. I am imagining some things that can transpire before Ross leaves; the big hurdle is them remaining in contact of course.
  12. Entry 38: Loving Him

    As They Say - Entry 38 11th July 1991 Reality has set in about yesterday. I can’t believe I jerked off in front of Ross. I even rubbed my eyes raw today to make sure I had correctly got out of bed. I've no notion as to why I'd imagine this to have been a dream for some bizarre reason. Although when I met Ross today, it was apparent that what had happened yesterday did in fact transpire. That didn't stop me from contemplating about it all day; making reruns of the entire scenario in my head. Not because it was totally hot and the significance was exceptionally well-timed when I think of it now. The other was something in the mutual exhibit that has alerted me to the plausible fact. I'm sincerely in love. I mean it wasn't just a quick jerk off stanza and then nothing else, I exhibited an emotional connection with Ross when I was doing it. I'm not sure if Ross underwent the same thing, though I hope he does because it meant more to me than only having fun. Don't get me wrong I did like the fun bit of what we did, except there was something deep-rooted that was more meaningful to me anyway. I whole gang assembled today. Everyone was in high spirits; Ross was there too. The way he displayed his affections towards me has become increasingly alarming. Perhaps with what occurred yesterday then I'm genuinely not going stir crazy from being cooped up too long. In all truth, today Ross secretly persisted glancing over at me and then anytime I'd make eye contact with him he would get all bashful and cute. Suddenly I'd get these little fuzzy feelings inside my stomach and then it was all game over. I attempted to maintain my focus and listen to what the boys were saying, only anytime I glanced over at Ross he just made my emotions run wild. It was like one of those moments where you want to do something, and the only thing you can do is chase after it with all you've got. It's hard to explain how my emotions appear; all I know is that they want to leap out of my body and guide me, or at least that's how it suggests. Each time I looked over at him, I'd get all shy and bashful too. Ultimately, Eli picked up on it, and he questioned us about it. He inquired, "are you going to let us in on the inside joke?" I was anxious, petrified more like at the assumption of everyone discovering what Ross and I had today in the group. When I saw the irony in Eli's inquiry; given the fact that we were giggling like a couple of little schoolgirls, then obviously something was inherently funny. I grasp it's a little bit selfless and stupid to display my feelings like that, however, I couldn't help it, all I wanted to do was get shy. Solely I told Eli that there was nothing to it actually; all we were doing was laughing. It was one of those times when you look across at another person, and that person is beaming. Then giggling becomes contagious, and you start reverting into a hyena too. Eli, of course, understood this, but he gave me sceptical eyes as if he wasn't that stupid. I'm still not too sure whether Eli realises the full extent of Ross and I. Reasonably he does, I don't feel comfortable discussing that sort of information with him. Can you imagine it, trying to explain that Ross and I are hot for each other and that I pulled at myself while I was looking at him? Of course, you wouldn't tell him any of that... you'd brush over the details. And give him the bigger picture except leave out the tiny details or at least that's how I'd picture it to be. We all went into town around noon, and we had a late brunch then decided to play some pool. At first, it was Carl and I. The two of us were playing pool. Moreover, I was winning for the first time in god knows how long. Next Eli came over with Ross and said that the two of them would like the join in as well. So, inevitably we ended up playing doubles. Connor and Thomas were too busy stuffing their faces with food to care; therefore they simply sat out and watched us. From the corner of my eye, I could get a vibe coming off Thomas. It's extra visible now that I took the time actually to regard it. Anytime I peeped across at him he came across a little girly to me. I don't think it was intentional it just materialised out of thin air. And it's not obnoxious either it's not like I'm totally a girl like' type of deal. The way Thomas was presenting himself, it was more like I know I'm cute kind of deal. Which in retrospect Thomas is cute. I don't want to exactly commit to that because I'll probably end up plaguing myself over it in the future. Not that I didn't want to show some interest in him. I figured that it would be hard to show him that sort of affection considering he's been one of my friends for a couple of years. Then after Ross arrived, Thomas suddenly changed the anticipation to a point where I feel like I'm almost drowning in it. I know I shouldn't complain at the fact that I had three people chasing after me all at the same time is comforting. I'm not sure why it makes me feel confident in a way that I don't think I could be in any other. That leaves me to defer the question. How many people are chasing after Thomas and Ross? Exactly how many people are hunting for anybody, how many people stay unnoticed, silent and dare to dream? I'd imagine the numbers and statistics are a lot higher than the people who evidently acted and took what they want. Only now do I see what action does and how beneficial taking action is. Words are the mindless jumble of unassorted emotions; doing something worthwhile to get you ahead is everyone's ideal goal when only a fraction are willing to do it. I can't believe how lucky I got with Ross. I mean he's perfect in every sense of the word, and I love him. I promised myself that I'd take up any summer jobs I can get my hands on and save all my allowance so that I will have enough to see him. I'll take my action so I can be with the one I want to be with. That sounds like a pretty good plan, and I promise it's not going to be plain words directly written in here. I'm going to get up off my ass and work so that I can get to see Ross again. To make the matter worse while we were playing pool the conversations shifted to the topic of Ross's departure. I mean why did everyone have to talk about that. Again, they don't know how I'm feeling about the entire situation. As far as everyone else is concerned Ross is just another friend who's coming and going in my life, except to me he's much more than that. Ross is something I can't explain. It feels like the inside of my chest is hollow, it seems full when Ross is around. At the same time, I'm still happy, and I can't understand why. If I'm feeling this way shouldn't I be sad? Anyway, the exchange carried on for the entire pool game, and everyone was slightly disappointed that Ross had to go back home. Which surprised me; here I thought that Ross didn't mean all that much to my friends. Sure they like him but not as much as to warrant an emotional response to his departure. I assumed I was the only one that was going to be in that boat but it made it comforting to know that Ross had a supplementary cause and effect on everyone in the group. Thomas even showed signs of anguish. It's funny to think that one person has the power to change and alter everyone else's universes. Only a month and 1/2 ago when Ross arrived clean and fresh, I had no idea what I was getting myself into. Now one look at him and its evidence to see that he has made everyone's life so much warmer by his presence. Regardless after a bit, the talk died out about Ross leaving everyone returned to standard conversation tactics. After the pool, we decided to get more food because why not we were hungry. And Ross said that he had run out of money so he couldn't buy any food. So I bought him a burger and chips, and he seemed genuinely content with that. Once I glanced across at Thomas and saw the hurt in his eyes. I couldn't figure out for the life of me what I had done to him to dispense this hurt, though I felt guilty after a little bit; therefore I got up and ordered him a burger and chips too. And his mood slightly shifted. Ross looked funny as if to say ' okay... I’m not sure what that was for.’ I don't think Ross was jealous or anything or if he was I didn't get a hint of it. I hope I didn't offend anybody by doing it. I just that I felt sorry for Thomas and I'm still trying to make it up to him although I'm not too sure if I'm doing it correctly. Perhaps it was the fact that Thomas knows that I am gay without me having to state the obvious. I hope I'm not displaying my gayness out in the open and everyone understands that, and no one is saying anything. That would be embarrassing, anyway I think it was the fact that I turned Thomas down and that I bought Ross food. Isn't that what the boy-girl relationship has to do? The boy has to buy the girls food because it's customary. Maybe that's why he was a little bit hurt, and I'm still sorry about it. I never even given a chance to explain himself and well I suppose I can't now anyway. Oh, and before forget; Carl asked us if we could help him on his farm tomorrow. His dad is harvesting turf, and Ross has been given a rather large section of land to cultivate and dig up. So, all the boys offered to help him tomorrow so that should be fun. I'll come home tomorrow covered in turf and mud. I happened to be surprised when Ross said that he'd help out too; therefore I guess that will be fun to see. Right… I should be off; I'll talk to you later… Yep, I'm doing it again. Talking to a fricking book… Any-who - night Adam. 12th July 1991 Well, I am beat… I'm only out of the shower and let me tell you this… turf is superbly messy. I agreed to help out Carl today because his father wanted all the dead vegetation in the field uprooted. Not only was the experience painfully uncomfortable considering my hands are still red and slightly blistered from the wooden handle of the shovel that I was using for the majority of the day. But also, from the sweltering sun that was beaming down on me. I considered at one point I was going to pass out from the heat because I was working pretty goddamn hard at that too. No matter how many times I've run cold water on my hands to cool them down, it's not working. It's irritating. Even holding this pencil in my hand is a challenge. Anytime I grip the shaft a little bit tighter it does a slight twinge with the loose skin at the top of my palm. Now mind you it's not painful it's durable it's just... Ah nevermind. I woke early this morning to get a few things done before I went over to Carl's to do hard manual labour. Once I finished breakfast, I knocked into Ross, and the two us hiked to Carl's. When we got there we were the first two to arrive, funnily enough, Carl wasn't even out of bed. I guess me and Ross have a thing at rising early. Though he didn't complain he just got dressed, and we waited around for the other boys to show up. As we sat out on the front porch, the conversation dabbled in a bit of all areas. At one time we were talking about what was in the media before changing to Ross and Carl's display each other's cuts and scars. I don't know how the conversation got started. Although I didn't think Ross would have a wound. I never honestly noticed it when I was looking at him. It's well confined that if you weren't studying him intently, you wouldn't see it. Of course, stating the obvious Carl has more cuts and scrapes than anybody else in the gang. Ross lifted his fringe out of the way, and where his hairline meets the top of his forehead, sure enough, there was a small scar. When I asked him how he got it, Ross said that when he was a kid, he liked to climb. All I could do was smirk at him because I don't think climbing has ever left him. So, as I continued to listen Ross eventually got to the point. He said that he had ascended over the safety gate at the bottom of the stairs in his parents’ house hundreds of times. Then all of a sudden one morning Ross clambered up an over it and fell off the other side and hit his head on a chair at the bottom of the stairs. Resulting in him needing to get five stitches and a lot of crying as he recalled. I would be lying if I said that that didn't bother me in the slightest bit, I mean I strive to find out every single detail about Ross; however, I missed this one. The most obvious of places it could be, then again, his hairline was covering it so... Yeah. Most importantly he is okay. Thomas was next to arrive and then not long after that Eli and Connor strolled up the driveway. It wasn't far of a stroll away from the house; we went to the left of the residence and jumped the fence before strolling down a small bit of a hill, and eventually voilà we found the bogland. We all got to work remarkably without asking any questions. We knew what we had to do and the trailer was already set up in the field from the night before. All we had to do was hurl it into the back of the container. Around noon we stopped for lunch when his mother came down to was with a load of drinks and freshly baked cookies with a side of sandwiches. Carl's mam is friendly; as she was heading on back up to the house, she was saying, "growing boys need their grub." And subconsciously we all just agreed and practically tore away at the contents that were on the plates between all of us. Nobody was left out of course, but the way we all dove in for the food would suggest that we were like cannibals or hadn't eaten in a very long time. It was amusing to see the expression on Ross's face after he saw everyone snapping for food, to be honest, I even found it funny. Subsequently, a hard day’s work came to an end and because Carl’s dad asked us to do one last thing and that was to move the trailer up into the garden. Carl disappeared for about five minutes and came back with a tractor; he had to drive all the way around the long way into the field. Before we knew it, we had the container hooked up, and we had carted it all the way back to the turf shed as Carl calls it and left it there. We were all offered a dinner: something just to fill the gap but not enough to put us off our meals our mothers would cook. When he came back out Carl’s dad had tipped the entire cart into a barn shaped structure right next to the peat shed. All the construction had was a roof and all four walls around it were completely missing; inevitability us boys with some playful energy to burn off we started sloping all over the small mountain of sod. It was quite fun I didn't think I'd get amusement out of climbing a hill worth of fuel for the fire. Of course, after a bit, we grew tired because after all, we had such a labour-intensive day that we resorted to talking. The topic of discussion about going to the mountains came up when Ross let it slip out a little more enthusiastically than expected. The way he did it to made me feel all gooey inside. Ross sat at the peak of the hill glancing down at me. The way he casually let the conversation slip and slide into each other made me all that more appreciative of his diverse social skills. One second Ross is reserved and then the next he is exuberant in the amount of energy he wants to display. Following the news, he let drop: of what we intended to do on Saturday, everyone seemed to have been given the notion that it would be a good outing for everybody. Don't get me wrong; I don't mind people tagging along with us, except I was rather hoping that the outing would've been just for Ross and me only. I guess I'm going for the hopeless romantic sort of type deal. And now though it seems apparent that everyone would like to go considering we've lived here our entire life and not once have, we decided to climb that mountain range. Then all of a sudden when Ross comes along and then lets everyone knows that that's what we intend to do; suddenly entire gang wants to do it. Consequently, I caved in and relented. I figured what's the worst that could happen if I let every else go. I mean it would be sorta selfish to exclude everyone else just for the sake of having some alone time with Ross before he is to leave. Eli asked, "are you sure?" Following the idea of the boys tagging along for the day. At first, I was hesitant even to consider it, but now that I think about it I suppose it would be a nice day out. Or if I can get all the boys to lay off then perhaps that could be an excellent way to go about it too. Is it selfish of me that I want to go here on my own with Ross? If so how do I get rid of the boys, I've never wanted to get discard of people so much, but I can't help but imagine that this is incredibly important. So, I said, "well... Yeah, it'd be great if you could come along." I determined the best course of action at the time was to stop thinking of my foolish desires. Maybe this could be the last day that any of us will have a memorable moment. Perhaps it will be the pinnacle of Ross's time spent here, and if Ross wants everyone to go which apparently it seems so, then I want what's best for Ross. Subsequently, Eli didn't know if I was genuine or not so he just gave me a sheepish expression and then reverted to compose stature. He appeared to be thinking now. Eli gave me no indication that he liked the idea. He mumbled, "hmmm…" And that was it he didn't say anything else for a couple of seconds until Carl broke the silence. Carl who sat up at the top of the heap with Ross was cradling a piece of turf between his two hands, playing with it. Carl appeared to be rooted in thought and then he broke a joke, "why? You afraid of heights…” The lads in the group immediately began to start sniggering, and I guess I even cut a bit of a smile. The meagre amount of stick that was generated was apparently aimed at Eli who didn't give much of an indication. Of course, knowing Eli, he didn't wait very long to back up his front. Eli gave a bemused grin, and sarcastically stated, "psh… nawh… more like Adam.” I have no idea why I was dragged into the topic of discussion. Then again when I realistically study it, considering I was petrified of climbing a radio tower, I wonder how I'll hold up climbing the highest mountain range in Ireland. Surely it can't be that high, can it? It will be like never leaving the ground only; you're a couple of thousand feet in the sky. Inevitably would that place me in the air or am I still on the ground. I'm not sure, but all I can think about is how steep the sheer drop of the cliff might look like on one side. I'm not sure why I got myself into this now, but I'm starting to panic slightly. What if I can't complete the entire trial for the sake of Ross. That would make me a pussy; if I can't make it to the top of a mountain range then what would Ross think. I guess I'm slightly a little bit more determined to see this exact the only the notion of climbing the side of the mountain for hours is a little bit scarier. Do I necessarily have to climb the mountain because does it still account if I attach a camera to someone's head and let them document it for me and then when they come back down I can watch the video? Yeah, perhaps that's a stupid idea. Alternatively of finding something incentive to say I just leaned over and gave Eli a playful shove and he shouldered back. And then Eli said something that I didn't expect him to say at all. Considering he knows about my secret the way he tried to persuade the boys to take a step down today was admirable. Eli has grown so much over the last month or two, and I believe I like it. He doesn't seem to be as harsh with people, and god knows Jonathan didn't deserve to be bullied by Eli. Though since Ross's arrival Eli has backed down on his sometimes-domineering antics. Eli said, "besides I think Adam and Ross should go. Climbing mountains, trees and radio towers from what I hear are hobbies of theirs." I glanced across at him in part alarm. I was wondering what he was trying to get out. Sceptically I quizzed my brain as to how he knew about the radio tower. I don't recall telling him, and he seems to have picked up on this weird idea that Ross and I have an obsession with climbing things. I don't inherently have an obsession scaling things; it's Ross who likes mounting massive structures. That sounded wrong... you know what I mean. Perhaps that's something I need to look into because I don't remember letting him in on that sort of gossip. Anyhow as the day drew to a close, we all decided the entire team would accompany us up the side of the mountain. Eli said that he could get his mam to drive the rest of the stragglers along for the ride. I suppose now that what had been initially intended as a romantic get-away on my behalf for Ross on Sunday has turned into an extravaganza for the entire crew. In all I think today went pretty well actually, I enjoyed the simplicity of it all. The weather was perfect, the conversation was awesome, and I got to spend it with the most amazing people in the world. Anyway, I should be off the bed it's been a long day, and I'm spent. Tomorrow should be good, and a lot is going to happen tomorrow. Night – Adam. 13th July 1991 My legs are killing me; I don’t think I’ll ever walk again. Every part of my body is in agony; not because I fell or was in a fight. All that uphill walking was intense; my ankles keep cracking every time I rotate them. The sound emanating from them every time I do it sounds like cement mixers lopping with every rotational turn. I'm not sure if that is okay or not but they're not pain, so that's something. Though I think I will be out of action tomorrow from walking for a little bit. Either that or I'll probably spend most of the day sitting down. Today was terrific a matter of fact. I don't think I could've asked for a more incredible day. The best part of it all was that everyone was in high spirits and the sun was high in the sky, and Ross smiled so goddamn much that I thought, an impermanent smile would be embedded into his face. There's nothing more pleasing and aesthetic than watching that cutie smile. When I woke this morning, I made sure I had everything packed up for the journey ahead. I made sure I had some extra water, and some appropriate clothes in case of rain started to fall during our descent up. I even went as far as to check the weather forecast on RTE; I didn't want a shower to sweep over the lands and put a damper on anything. Thankfully there was no rainfall in sight, and our whole race to the finish point at the top of the mountain was done in under seven hours. When I started this morning, I didn't conclude that it would take that long to walk the range. Seven hours seems like a prominent number now when you're only halfway up the mountain, and I'll get to that in a minute. First thing I did when I got up this morning was I had a shower, followed by a phone call to Eli to make sure that he was still coming along. Everything seemed to be in working order, and everyone was going to be picked up. It was arranged that my dad would take me, Ross and Carl. While Eli's Mother Would drive, Eli, Thomas, Conor. Everything was set, and all we had to do was make it to the base of the mountain around 9 AM. As I sat down to breakfast at 8 AM, I had this tingle of excitement erupting in my stomach. I was about to start eating my meal when Ross came in exuberant, full of life and raring to go. It was adorable to watch as I was scarfing down my breakfast with him directly sitting across from me rambling on animatedly. I'm glad to see that I could have that sort of effect on Ross, that he is looking forward to something that I planned and that made my heart feel full. When we loaded into the car the drive over to Carl’s is legendary. I've never seen Ross talkative so, soo… urgh… Perfect. Everything about him this morning was radiant. How the light shone through his window, the way, he'd tilt his head to glance out the window, the sparkle in his eye. I so badly wanted to lean in and kiss him, and though I didn't because of course, my dad was in the car. I don't think I was smiling I was just transfixed. When we pulled up aside Carl's house, Ross glanced across at me as my dad honked the horn and I think he saw something in me that I wasn't even aware that I was giving off. Being truthful right about now seems to be the most logical aspect of what is essential. I'm going to miss that quirky, foolish excitement coming from Ross. I love that about him how he seems to take everything in his stride and makes the best of an unfortunate situation. Being able to sit there next to him and admire all he is made time slow for me. I wouldn't change a thing, not even the little scar that he has on his forehead… It adds authenticity and makes him real and exciting to be around. The quiet boy act was alluring for a time the now since I see past the shy boy premise all I can conclude is everything that I'm going to miss. On the drive to the drop off point, all I could imagine was everything that made Ross's existence extraordinary. How I love the sound of his voice, the way it fluctuates when he's happy and how it falls to faint whisper when he is sad; the sheer audacity of the silence would be enough that you would be able to hear a deadened dried leaf crackle. How his eyelashes waver seductively without him realising it. Or when one corner of his mount always seems to smirk up when he's grinning higher than the other. The little shimmer of light in his eyes or the little shy bow of the head he does. Every time Ross enthusiastically scales the side of the tree or radio tower, the confidence and the insurance he adds to such dangerous matters always at a comfortable level of confidentiality. It's as if it's okay to be afraid and he won't judge you regardless of whether you're scared or not. At at the same time, Ross seems to have dismissed it, or somewhere along the line without him having to ask he makes you do something without you having any obligation to say no. His dress sense, I'll miss the way he dresses everything about his fashion trend is not a carbon copy. He likes to wear what he's comfortable in; his clothing attire is always cute and artsy in some sense or way. Some of it may be loud and bold, but it doesn't represent all of his personality. I will miss his smell, I know it sounds weird when I phrase it like this, but it's an aroma I have gotten so comfortable with. Anytime I catch a whiff of it sends me into the land of crazy and floaty. Lastly, there's something about his touch, gentle and caring. His soft nature but adventurous whim is to be desired, sought-after and never changed. Oh, how I’m going to miss Ross… Anyway, I should get back to what is talking about. When we arrived at the base of the mountain, we all huddled together. Everyone seemed to be excited about the big climb. The adults wanted to make sure that we took the safest route possible. Eli's mam said that she'd do the mountain with us and my dad was going to climb the beast. We decided to take the slightly longer route rather than Devils Ladder because it is such a steep incline going up the hill that if one of us fell... well... the adult would not be chasing the kids tumbling down a couple of hundred feet onto a narrow ledge. When I looked up at the obscuring monster a gastric pull of tension gripped me in the lowest pits of my stomach. My first rational thought was what had I gotten myself into, more importantly how the fuck was I going to climb this. Now that I've done it I can proudly say that I rose it. But my god I tell you-you need to have your head tested if you're scaling it. Not because it's dangerous or anything but because the backs of my legs are done for. When we took off everybody was pacing up the hill at an alarming rate. Everybody had that remarkable, enthusiastic energy and drive just to get to the top. Eventually after about two hours of struggling up-hill that carried energy that once presented itself on the backs of those who are fortunate vanished with each step we grew higher. All I could do was watch the boys in front of me. Ross, however, was at the front of the pack, he was leaving everybody up the mountain trail. Not once did he tire, he drove forward and about three hours into the journey there was a small soft spot where we decided to stop for about 10 minutes to catch our breath. It even warranted a response from me and a couple of the other boys. We had the shout after Ross who apparently was on his own planet as he walked a reasonable distance before he heard shouting. When Ross turned around he became bashful and coy; though he finally came back down the small stretch that he had climbed all on his own and sat down beside me. There was a refreshing breeze coming from the south, and there was a bit of a cloud coming from the southwest. It appeared to be the only cloud in the sky, but it was quite monstrous; that alarmed the adults. Though it didn't look like a rain cloud or anything, so we decided to push on. Given that the altitude we were at I suppose it was common to see some clouds. I must say even though we were not at the top, the view from where we were was breathtaking. All I could see was a pale green painted against a blue background. It was like a nostalgic haze, and everything that was below us was unimportant and static. Just the magnificent landscape was domineering everything that humanity had built. When we decided to take off again, we walked for at least another 2 1/2 hours and then the cloud that had been seen way off in the distance rolled over us. We were blanketed in an entire mist. It was awesome; dangerous but awesome. It's not what I thought it would've been like. All it felt like was cold. It brushed against my cheeks the. We, of course, covered up to protect ourselves from the elements, I recall my cheeks becoming a little damp from the condensation, and at that time I was beginning to sweat something terrible. I couldn't decide which was worst my intensive breeding, the cool brooding air that loomed with the cloud or the backs of my calves. The illusion of the cloud, however, wore off after about 1/2 an hour of walking and eventually we were clambering up the final descent toward the top. I was a bit disappointed that all I could see was white either side of me. We now were on a more extended small treacherous trail. To the left of me was a subtle but sharp decline, to the right was a sheer drop of death. I didn't dare look down; I just kept marching forward hoping that I'd reach a small bit of land at the very top that I could sit down for a minute and get my bearings. The air felt a slight bit different too, the sensation, clean and crisp on the lungs. I don't think it was from the cloud however because when we got to the point that the trail began to widen out again, we cross the barrier between the cloud in the sky. We were back in the daylight again. I could see the mountaintop and surrounding hills for miles around. The sun was still shining, and all it appeared to be a was that cloud passing over. The delight that was once present floated back, and all I could think about was making it to the summit. When I did, I couldn't be more proud and alive. I was petrified of the height that I was at, but at the same time, I still felt a blanket of security being surrounded by the people I love. Even though my legs felt like jelly and my balance felt off, I took a breeder at the top of Carrauntoohil. You could see everything that was not in hidden; I considered I could see the faint contortion of what Killarney is often the distance. As odd as it may sound I think I'd do it again but then again, I said that when I was at the top of the mountain. However, when I got to the bottom Carrauntoohil, the attitude changed and I thought that that would not happen again. You should've seen the look on Ross's face it was indescribable, although it appeared to be much more to him than anybody else. All of us were looking off into the distance enjoying the aerial views; then ultimately most people started to retreat over behind the wall for lunch. That left Ross and I standing by the edge glancing out over the sheer beauty of untouched nature of man's deceptive greed. It was at this point that I thought that giving something to Ross that would memorable was a good idea. Like that, I dropped my backpack beside my feet and rummaged through it for the rock from the castle. I had plopped it in earlier, and I figured that if I found the right time, I'd give it to him. I presumed that this would be an ideal place to do it, so I got it out. I glanced down at it in my hand does Ross still kept his attention drawn to the world beneath us. “I want to give you something," I nervously said. Ross broke his attention and looked across at me; he waited for me to continue, so I did. I reverted my attention to the stone that was in my hand and lifted it up into view so that he could see it. It was special to me, so I wanted it to be unique to him, and if the timing were right then, this would be a memorable time of when I gave it to him. "I want you to have this so that you will remember me." Ross pivoted his head toward the rock brushed his hand into mine. We traded the small offering between the two of us, and he glued his eyes to it. He ran his thumb over the edge of the rock and then asked, "what is it?" "It's a stone…" I joked, and Ross gave a bit of a chuckle. "it's from the castle. I wanted you to take home a piece of the castle." Ross didn't speak he just kept his attention on the rock, and then after about 10 seconds he closed his fingers and on top of the memento and held it dearly. Ross shifted his focus back to me and beamed that beautiful smile. I took out my piece of the castle and said, “I have a piece to…" He smirked, let his concentration wander back out to the landscape, and the sound of gentle laughter and conversation filled the solitude. All of us sat around a human-made rock wall which was supposedly built to shelter people for when they reached the peak. We all huddled in close and ate lunch there. We stead at the tip for about another forty minutes taking pictures and resting before decided to head on back down. I thought that when I began to get back up from my sitting position that I wouldn't be able to move, my legs had seized up from all the walking. When we reached the bottom, I was glad to be on solid ground again. Even though the experience was joyful, I'll never trade it. Everything turned out swell, and everyone enjoyed themselves which is the main thing. I'll remember this day until the end of time. I don't believe I could've done a more memorable moment for Ross. The castle has been present in almost every day of our special friendship. Therefore, it only seemed fitting that Ross takes a piece of it home with him… Anyhow, I guess I'm going to turn in early tonight because I'm exhausted. So, with that, I'm going to sign off now and say good night. Good night Ross… Night – Adam.
  13. Hey guys for the readers of As They Say; I'm sorry to inform those following the story that I have been hit with writer's block since Tuesday. However, I finally got my Friday's addition done; only I'm mentally drained to edit it. I'm going to take the evening off and start fresh editing it in the morning; I hope to have the next entry up by 3 pm Greenwich Mean Time. Apologies.

    1. SolarMaxx

      SolarMaxx

      You’ve done a terrific job with this story @D.K. Daniels. I’m still in awe at how quickly you’ve posted your chapters! No apologies necessary as far as I’m concerned.

    2. D.K. Daniels

      D.K. Daniels

      Thanks, @SolarMaxx; I like consistency; only sometimes the routine is disturbed occasionally when the momentum comes tumbling down. :) Though not to worry the new entry is up lol.

  14. Entry 37: Found

    Thank you @SolarMaxx; I am delighted that you consider some of my writing poetry; honest I'm not even trying lol. The biggest try for me is figuring out how to end the entire book. I have quite a few storylines all coming to a close and I'm trying my best to plug them up, answer them and leave some open as not everything in life gets a resolution. I wanted it to be light and I guess it came through in this chapter. I always try to keep it realistic where I can. I believed the innocence and curiosity of what happened in this chapter had to outway pretty much everything else. So I decided to go with a simple approach and make it as clear as possible. It's always at times like this that I regret bringing the story to a close. For one yes I miss the characters, but the absurd amount of pressure that is linked with an ending is insane lol. Thanks for continuing to read my story and I hope in the future that you will read a couple others I might have to offer.
  15. Entry 37: Found

    True the clock is ticking. Though I think it made it special that everything happened to fall into place. Even though time is short they still have that bond with I assume will last long after they part ways. I think the lads got to where they needed to be; the wall of sexual intimacy is gone now so that leaves both the characters exposed.
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