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Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

The Trial of Jordan Colmar - 2. Chapter 2: The Victim

Peter tells the jury what happened when he met Jordan just before the assault. We learn a few things we didn't know before

"I still think you should tell someone about Colmar's threat." Dan pulled out his note pad from the trial bag his associate brought over. "People do crazy things when they’re emotional."

Martin gave Dan a stare. "Given the cases I see in our office, I think I know what people are capable of."

"Maybe, but you also might be too close to the situation to be thinking clearly." Adjusting his reading glasses, he skimmed through the files on the table. Turning, he said, "Alan, where are the medical files?"

"Right here, sir." Martin watched the young associate skim through the files on the desk; just like Mary did for him.

"Mr. Pratner, sir?" He turned to find two of the bigger deputy sheriffs standing behind him.

"Yes?"

"Sheriff Ghegahn assigned us to make sure you're okay for the rest of the trial," the one to his left said. Hicks, it said on his name plate. The brawny deputy reminded him of an ex-marine, with his 'high and tight' brown crew cut. Freeman, the other deputy; the dark brown skin of his shaved head almost shiny, nodded in agreement.

When he turned, Dan was shaking his head to tell Martin he hadn't made the call. "Wasn't me Martin."

"I called," Mary said. "Sheriff Gheghan was more than happy to assign someone to you."

He didn't want this to be a distraction. "Thanks guy, all I ask is you not be too obvious during the trial."

"Not a problem sir," Freeman assured him. "We've done this before."

Checking his watch, he sifted through his own folders, pulling Peter Gregory's from the middle. "Is Peter outside yet?"

"Yes, he and his family, along with Jason and his, are waiting in the witness room." Mary pulled her, much thicker, file from her litigation bag and led the way.

"What is it with the young ones?" Dan joked. "They all seem to think the bigger file the better."

Feeling the deputies behind him, he did his best to ignore them. His focus needed to be on getting Peter through his testimony. It was really not extensive. The bulk of the case was the officer, the co-defendant turned ‘state’s evidence’ and the doctor. Other than the hate crime element, Peter's testimony would be brief; he didn't know much.

The small room was crowded when they opened the door. Scanning the faces, he remembered to smile, to keep them all relaxed.

"Hello everyone." The guards stayed in the hall, lowering his anxiety level a notch or two. "Everyone sleep well and eat a good breakfast?"

Amidst the nervous laughter he heard a smattering of affirmative responses. "Well, I'm going to need everyone, but Peter, to step out so we can go over things one last time."

Jason turned to his boyfriend, nodding quietly. "It'll be a snap, Pete. They can't twist the truth."

"Thanks, Jase." Martin watched Peter's hand come up, noting for the first time the boys were holding hands. As many trials as he'd done, the impact on the lives of the victims always moved him.

"Martin," Royce Tellerman said, walking behind his wife. "Good to see you again. When this is over, you need to come to the house for a cook out. Been too long since you and Louise have visited."

"Deal." He shook the offered hand. Taking Barbara's hand, he asked, "You doing okay?"

"As well as I can. It's been a struggle, but we're getting through it." She smiled warmly. Definitely not the stony exterior he'd come to expect from her.

When it was only Peter and the three attorneys, Martin made sure the door was completely closed. "How you holding up?"

Adjusting his tie, he nodded twice. "Not bad. We did what Mary suggested; went home had dinner, watched a movie and went to bed early."

"Good." He still looked nervous, but at least Peter wasn't tired. "So this is going to go just as we practiced. I'll start with a couple questions about who you are, then the night of October 7th, we'll talk about your encounter with Jordan in January '09 and then the aftermath of the attack. They're going to try to get you mad, so don't let them. Remember - and I know this is hard, I've been a witness before - don't get mad. Don't worry about what they’re trying to do, we get the last word. Last ,if you don't know something, 'I don't know' is a fine answer."

"Yes, sir." Peter met his eye for an instant then lowered his eyes.

"Seeing Jordan for the first time might be a shock, just remember to take a deep breath and not stare at him. This is a conversation between you me and the jury. When it's their turn to ask questions, be polite, it'll annoy the crap out of them if they can't rattle you."

Peter gave him a smirk and a small laugh. "Got it."

Putting a hand on his shoulder, Martin waited until Peter looked up. "I'm proud of you, Peter. This isn't easy, but you've been great throughout. It's almost over."

"Thanks, Mr. Pratner. You and Mary and your whole office have been so great to me and Jase, it made it a lot easier."

"You bet." One last squeeze and he let go. "You can go sit with Jason if you like, just don't…."

"Yeah, I know." He rolled his eyes, smiling. "Don't talk about the case or my testimony."

"Smart alec kids." Martin laughed as he left the room. Jason stood just outside, talking quietly with the deputies. Martin smiled as he turned toward the courtroom and heard Mary tell Jason he could go in with Peter.

"He's a good kid," Dan said. "Ray Henry thinks the world of him."

"Yeah, he is Dan, and not because Ray said so. Peter's been through a lot, but those two seem to take it all in stride." He unbuttoned his suit jacket and was about to sit down when he heard a voice.

"What do you mean you didn't reserve seats for us upfront? That's our son on trial." Rebecca Colmar's pinched eyes and sour expression were a perfect complement to her whiny voice.

Rankin appeared next to her, clearly unhappy. "What's the meaning of this? We were told the front row would be reserved for Jordan's family."

The female deputy being harangued looked to Hicks and Freeman and, when they nodded, she shrugged.

"Sheriff Ghegahn will be here soon, you can ask him."

As if on cue, Ghegahn pulled the door open.

"This should be fun," Mary whispered.

Ghegahn's reputation for dealing with lawyers, especially defense lawyers, had everyone watching. Loyalty to his deputies and dedication to court safety would also be part of his legacy. "Is there a problem, sir?"

Rankin turned, giving Martin a quick glare. "Sheriff, before the trial began, we asked and you agreed, to keep the front row reserved for Jordan's family. Now…"

"That was before your client's father saw fit to threaten the prosecutor last night after court adjourned." Ghegahn towered over the well dressed attorney. His steel gray hair lent authority to his chiseled jaw and large frame. "Pratner wouldn't press charges, but two deputies heard him. Be glad I'm as forgiving as the D.A., or I'd have him arrested with or without Pratner's okay."

No doubt the Sheriff was itching to lock up a wealthy family member just to add to his rep. A lecture on being soft was coming when the trial was over, but that was for another time.

"I did nothing of the sort," Hank Colmar growled. "These defamatory remarks …"

"You know, sir. I'd watch how you speak about my men. Based on their statements, I can have you locked up right now. So, you can sit in the back, the row I've reserved for you and your family, or you can leave. There is no in-between, no negotiations. It's here, or leave."

Rankin and the family exchanged angry looks, and then turned back to the still glaring Sheriff before the attorney motioned for the family to take the row that was offered.

Show over, Martin readied himself for the morning's testimony.

**

"Do you swear or affirm to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?"

"I do." Peter said.

"You may be seated, sir," the judge said. "Mr. Pratner?"

"Thank you, Your Honor." Moving around the table, he positioned himself closer to his witness. "Sir, could you introduce yourself to the jury by telling them your name."

Peter leaned closer to the microphone. "Peter Gregory."

"Son." All eyes were on the Judge. "The microphones are plenty powerful and the courtroom was designed so that even without it, everyone can hear you if you speak at a normal level. Just make yourself comfortable and relax."

Martin noted more than a couple jurors smiled at the Judge's gentle handling of a clearly nervous witness. That Rankin looked about to explode made it better.

"Do you mind if I call you Peter?" They'd gone over this when they practiced, but he wanted to show Peter the proper respect in front of the jury.

"No, sir, that's fine."

"Peter, how old are you?"

"Twenty-one, sir."

"Do you work or go to school?" Dressed in a grey suit, Peter couldn't have presented better if Martin dressed him himself.

"Both, sir. I go to Graydon on an academic scholarship and I work part time."

The nods from the jury made his smile more real. "What year are you?"

"I start my senior year in a few weeks."

"Where do you live?"

"On Otis Street, a block from campus."

"Is it an apartment?"

"No, sir. We rent a house."

"Who's we?"

"Me, Jason, his younger brother, Dean and our friend, Darryl."

"How do you know your roommates?"

"We all go to school together. Jason's my boyfriend. Dean is his brother and Darryl and Jason have been best friends since they were ten. Jason, Darryl and Dean all play for the school soccer team."

"How long have you and Jason been dating?"

"It will be two years in October."

"Are Darryl and Dean a couple?"

"Objection." Rankin stood up.

"Basis."

"Relevance, Your Honor." Martin smiled. Foolish objection.

"Mr. Pratner?"

"This was charged as a hate crime. I'm laying the foundation for questions that go to an element of that crime."

"Overruled. You may answer the question, Mr. Gregory."

"Do you need me to repeat the question, Peter?"

"No, sir. Darryl and Dean are not a couple, they're both straight."

"How long have you four lived together?"

"We just moved in the first of August."

"Before that where were you?"

"I lived alone on Murdoch Street, in the Park View Apartments. That’s a couple miles west of campus."

"What about the other three?"

"Jason and Darryl were roommates for three years. They lived on campus. Dean's a freshman, but he and Jason are tight, so we invited him to live with us."

"Do you recall where you were living in October of last year?"

"Yes, sir. In Park View Apartments."

"What about Jason and Darryl."

"They lived on campus, at the University owned apartments; Foxhill Apartments."

"Turning your attention to October 7, 2009, did anything unusual happen to you?"

"Yes, sir, I was assaulted and beaten up."

"What happened prior to the assault?"

"Jason and I had a fight, a big fight. I basically tossed him out of my apartment."

"What were you fighting about?"

"His mother wanted him to go to some ex-gay classes, and I wanted him to tell her no. He was concerned about finishing school without his parents’ support, but I didn't care, I wanted him to say no anyway."

"What happened after that?"

"He left and I stewed about it for a couple hours. I called my best friend in Minnesota and, after we talked, I realized I was wrong to pressure Jason like that. All it did was make certain we'd split up. So I tried to call him, but he didn't answer."

"Then what did you do?"

"I went over to his apartment, but Darryl told me he wasn't home. I pretty much knew where he was, so I rode my motorcycle to the field house."

"Why did you go there?"

Peter smiled. "Jason has this quirk; that whenever he's upset, really upset, he goes and sits by the soccer field to think things through. Guess he spends so much time there it's like his second home."

A couple of the jurors smiled at Peter. Good, he was winning them over. "Did you find Jason there?"

"No, he wasn't there. I called his name a few times, but he didn't answer."

"What did you do when he wasn't there?"

"I figured the next most likely place was the Java Shack. That's his favorite place to go. Our current place is four blocks away, so now he can walk."

"Did you check the Java Shack?"

"No, sir. I never made it there."

"Why not?" Here was the heart of his case. Peter seemed to connect with the jury so far. Martin hoped it would continue.

"I ran into Jordan Colmar and some of his fraternity brothers."

"Did you know Jordan before October 7, 2009?"

Peter nodded, swallowing hard. "Yes, sir. He used to be friends with Jason, and we met the January before."

"Do you see Jordan in court?"

"Yes, sir." Martin watched Peter's face closely as he turned, pointing his right index finger at Jordan. "He's right there in the blue suit and yellow and blue tie."

"May the record reflect an in-court identification of the defendant Jordan Colmar?"

"The record will so reflect," The Judge answered, before Rankin could stand and object. The ruling made, Rankin sank back into his seat.

"What happened when you saw Jordan and his friends?"

"Jordan had a sneer on his face; he looked pleased with himself." He took a moment to swallow again. "He and three of his friends walked directly in my path and he started speaking."

"Do you remember what he said?"

"Yes, sir. He motioned toward me to his friends and said, 'this is the fag who turned my best friend into a butt pirate.'"

"Then what happened?"

"I told him to get out of my way, I was looking for Jason. He told me Jason didn't need to see me and in fact I should stay away and stop twisting Jason into this gay shit."

"Did he say, ‘gay shit’?"

"Yes, sir, those were his words."

"What happened when he said that?"

"I was about to push my way through them when I heard someone behind me. Jordan yelled, 'now' and that's the last thing I remember from that day."

"What do you mean, from that day?"

I woke up four days later in the hospital, feeling like crap."

He watched from the corner of his eye as jurors looked from Peter to Jordan. The testimony linked Bennett's account and the video tape, filling in the details neither could provide. So far, things were on track.

"Let's go back a bit and talk about your prior encounters with Jordan Colmar."

***

"Defense," Judge Milton peered over his glasses. Martin nodded and gave Peter a wink. He'd done a great job, but telling him would have to wait. "I assume you have more than fifteen minutes worth of cross?"

"Probably not, Your Honor," Rankin said. "Depends on how things come out."

Judge Milton looked as skeptical as Martin felt. No way Rankin would be done in an hour let alone fifteen minutes.

"Well, Mr. Rankin, I give you a choice, I can take our morning break now, or I can cut you off in mid sentence in fifteen minutes. At 10:30, I'm going to take a break. So what's your pleasure? Do you want to take the break now, or at 10:30?"

"I'd like to start now and see if I can finish before then."

"Very well, you may proceed."

Another bad move, several jurors clearly wanted to take a break straight away.

"Mr. Gregory, let's talk about the first meeting with Jordan. That was outside the student union, correct?

Yes, sir."

You, Jason, Darryl and two girls followed him there didn't you?"

"No, sir."

"In fact, you were waiting for him there so Jason could confront him, isn't that right?"

"No, sir. Jason and I needed to use the men's room. When I walked…."

"Mr. Gregory, my question was ‘yes’ or ‘no’. No explanation is needed. Are we clear?"

"Objection." Martin stood up, earning a glare from Rankin.

"Basis?"

"Argumentative."

"Sustained."

"Your Honor…" Rankin appeared surprised. "My question was a ‘yes or no’ one. His answer was not responsive. I was merely directing…."

"You were directing the witness?" The Judge leaned forward. "When did you become presiding judge of this courtroom? If you believe a witness isn't answering your question, you ask the court to direct the witness to answer. You do not presume to tell a witness how to act in my courtroom. Are we clear?"

Martin heard a snicker to his right. Expecting it to be Dan, he saw a juror shaking her head.

"Yes, sir."

"Now, did you want me to instruct the witness or did you want to ask a question?"

"I'll ask my next question, Your Honor."

"Very well."

Checking his notes, Rankin lost his momentum. Exactly what Martin intended. He gave Peter a wink and a smile. A slip of paper appeared in front of him on the table.

Don't push this too far - Milton might create reversible error if he says too much in front of the jury.

Turning to Dan, he nodded. He was right. The juror snickering could be a problem if they weren't careful.

"So, it's your testimony that you just happened upon Jordan?"

"No, sir. We were there first; he ran up to us."

"You're a black belt in Tae Kwon Do aren't you?"

"Yes, sir."

You were a state champion twice, correct?"

"Yes, sir."

"And you train others?"

"No, sir."

"No?"

"Since your client attacked me, I've had to give up teaching …"

"Objection, Your Honor." Rankin turned to the judge. "Non-responsive."

"Actually." The judge gave him an almost smirk. "By asking, 'no' as a question, you begged for an explanation. You may finish, Mr. Gregory."

"After Jordan and his friends attacked me, I couldn't teach for a while. I tried in the spring but my back hurt too much. So, for now, I'm not teaching."

Rankin glared at Peter, but he quickly caught himself. "My apologies. Back in January of '09, you were teaching martial arts, isn't that correct?"

"That is correct, sir."

"In fact you taught quite a few classes a week back then?"

"Yes, it was how I paid for school."

"As a black belt, you're required to tell people your status before you fight them, isn't that true?"

"I’ve never seen it in the law, but my teacher, Mr. Lee, taught me that it was proper to do so."

"And back in January, you didn't warn Jordan, did you?"

"No, sir."

"So, when you provoked him to swing at you, he hadn't been warned you were a martial arts expert, had he?"

"I don't what he knew, but I never had a chance to warn him; he swung at me."

"But you would agree you provoked him to swing at you?"

"No, sir, I wouldn't agree to that."

"You were taunting him, weren't you?"

"I don't believe I was taunting him."

"You insinuated he was gay, didn't you?"

"No, I insinuated he was a self-hating, closeted, gay man."

"And," Rankin ignored the answer, "you told him to go back to his fraternity house and let his fraternity brother's sodomize him."

"I believe I said something like that, after he called me a fucking faggot, yes." Peter's voice was so matter of fact, Martin couldn't hold back the smile.

"It was after that comment that you allege Jordan took a swing at you, correct."

"I'm not alleging it, he did swing at me."

"That was when you attacked him, putting him in a submission move, correct?"

"No, sir, I didn't attack him; he attacked me. I defended myself."

"You practically broke his wrist, isn't that true?"

"No,"

"Jordan screamed when you nearly broke his wrist, isn't that true?"

"Jordan screamed when I caught his fist and twisted his arm, yes."

Grabbing the pen, he wrote, 'how much longer is he going to let Peter bloody him?' Sliding the note over, he turned back to the witness stand.

"But even then, you never warned Jordan of your status, did you?"

"Actually, I did warn him. I told him if he did it again he wouldn't like what I did next."

"So you threatened him, is that correct?"

"No, sir. It was a warning that if he tried to punch me again, he'd get hurt."

"In fact, you were so worked up, your boyfriend asked you to leave, isn't that correct?"

"Yes, sir, that's true."

"Now, Mr. Gregory, after you provoked Jordan into trying to hit you, Jordan never tried to hit you again, did he?"

"Not that I can remember."

"And in fact, other than October 7, 2009, you and he hadn't spoken since that night, is that true?"

"Yes, sir. We hadn't had any contact in between those two dates."

"No further questions, Your Honor."

"Mr. Pratner, we have five minutes before the break," the Judge glanced at the jurors. "Would you care to do redirect now or after the break?"

"Whatever is more convenient for you and the jury, Your Honor."

"In that case, let's take our break and resume in twenty minutes. When we come back, we'll finish with Mr. Gregory's testimony and then be prepared with your next witness."

"Yes, Your Honor."

***

"That was an interesting morning." Dan smiled.

"You're really enjoying yourself, aren't you?" Martin found his good mood infectious.

"Of course." Gathering his note pads, he nodded to his associate. "Have lunch brought to the conference room, please."

"Yes, sir."

"You don't have to do that." He felt bad charging his lunch to Raymond Henry.

"Don't worry, this is coming from my pocket, not the firm’s or Ray." A hand on Martin's back let Dan guide him out. "My way of saying thanks for letting me do this again."

"Why so happy? I don't feel like I'm having fun." Stressing over every witness made it hard to have 'fun'.

"I'm just assisting. You're the D.A., not me. I get all the fun and none of the pressure."

"Oh, please." Martin rolled his eyes, following the 'entourage' out. "You want to win as much as I do."

Laughing, Dan let Mary and his associate led the way. "Of course. But I've been your opponent enough to know losing isn't the worst thing in the world."

Scanning to see there was no one nearby, he moved closer to Martin. "That, and we have a winning hand."

"I hope so." Martin told Peter and Jason's family go to lunch before the break. No reason to keep them confined in the small witness room. "Though, the way you handled our expert, the jury was lapping it up like puppies. That man broke things down so even a sixth grader could understand."

"Why do you think he is so ridiculously expensive? AND, he cut us a break because he wanted to be able to add being a government expert to his resume. I think you won't have made any friends among your fellow prosecutors by using him."

Martin nodded. That was something he hadn't considered. Being able to say he testified for both sides helped him shed the mantle of defense whore, or ‘quack whore’ as one of his assistants called defense doctors. Chuckling to himself, he pulled up when he had a thought.

"You didn't pick him just so the next time you use him against me I can't go after him, did you?"

"Honestly, Martin, I didn't think of it until today." Dan didn't appear to be lying. "I selected him because of how well he came across today. I knew his rep and this was vintage. I think he was inspired by the notion he was on the side of good for a change."

"Please, you mean you guys don't think you're the defenders of liberty?"

"Um, no, that is for those zealots the Public Defender service hires. Those are the true believers." Rolling his eyes, Dan laughed at his own joke. "Seriously, I take my role very seriously, but, as you know, some 'victims' are more innocent than others; some clients are more likable than others. Defending someone I truly believe is innocent is a calling. I would be every bit as passionate as I am in this case. Sadly there are so few of those cases."

That was honest. "Well said." Martin used his badge and number to enter the suite. "Let's go eat with our fellow crusaders and go over this afternoon's witnesses."

Jason is up next Chapter, let's see if he can do as well as Peter did.
Copyright © 2011 Andrew Q Gordon; All Rights Reserved.
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Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
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Is it wrong of me to say I hope the whole Colmar family goes down in flames? Peter doesn't sugar coat this does he. He lets the jury see that everything wasn't perfect in his life. The defense sure won't be able to say Peter is hiding anything. Great chapter and can't wait for more Andy.

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Great chapter, Andy!! :worship::worship:

 

Peter was perfect. Frankly, I'm a little worried about how well Jason will handle his emotions under cross. Given that Peter's injuries are still affecting him, I'm guessing Jason may still feel a great deal of anger towards Jordan. I'll just have to wait and see, I suppose.

 

I was happy to note that Jason's mom is still on-board and supporting Jason and Peter. :2thumbs:

 

Dan is cool! :D

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Wow, just wow. Best chapter of this story so far and ranks up there with the best of SS. I loved all the little "reveals", to me, this totally expanded upon Second Shot's #24 (Pick A Side).

 

"He left and I stewed about it for a couple hours. I called my best friend in Minnesota and, after we talked, I realized I was wrong to pressure Jason like that.

So this is our first indication that Pete called Bryce that night. Funny how I never would have imagined he would do that.

"I was about to push my way through them when I heard someone behind me. Jordan yelled, 'now' and that's the last thing I remember from that day."

We have to speculate that someone hit Pete on the head with the bat (or something, I mean, he did end up in a coma). If DA Pratner is smart, he will address that "now" comment on re-direct.

"Jordan screamed when you nearly broke his wrist, isn't that true?"

LMAO, you just have to love the way that defense attorneys twist the truth around. I so want to smack this guy six ways to Sunday.

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On 08/21/2011 01:04 PM, comicfan said:
Is it wrong of me to say I hope the whole Colmar family goes down in flames? Peter doesn't sugar coat this does he. He lets the jury see that everything wasn't perfect in his life. The defense sure won't be able to say Peter is hiding anything. Great chapter and can't wait for more Andy.
In my experience, if you only present one side of things, i.e. I've done nothing wrong, jurors tend to wonder. Telling the good, bad, and ugly, gives them more of a sense you are being honest and they should credit your testimony. Hopefully it all works out in the end. :P
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On 08/21/2011 01:18 PM, KevinD said:
In agree with Comicfan - the Colmars need their nose rubbed in it... :devil:
Don't forget what Dan told Martin, there is a little surprise packet of info courtesy of one Hurricane Barbara and her husband's accounting prowess waiting to be unwrapped. But yeah, the Colmar's are not the world's favorite peeps.
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On 08/21/2011 02:17 PM, Conner said:
Great chapter, Andy!! :worship::worship:

 

Peter was perfect. Frankly, I'm a little worried about how well Jason will handle his emotions under cross. Given that Peter's injuries are still affecting him, I'm guessing Jason may still feel a great deal of anger towards Jordan. I'll just have to wait and see, I suppose.

 

I was happy to note that Jason's mom is still on-board and supporting Jason and Peter. :2thumbs:

 

Dan is cool! :D

Thanks Conner, I think Jason will be fine - but what do I know 0:) - - As for his mom, well she and Amanda have become good friends, the kind that stay friends if the kids don't stay together - [not saying they won't just using it as an analogy.] That and Barbara has a new target to vent her venom on - Rebecca - the Mouth That Gossiped' Colmar - nuff said. :P
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On 08/21/2011 05:49 PM, TrevorTime said:
Wow, just wow. Best chapter of this story so far and ranks up there with the best of SS. I loved all the little "reveals", to me, this totally expanded upon Second Shot's #24 (Pick A Side).

 

"He left and I stewed about it for a couple hours. I called my best friend in Minnesota and, after we talked, I realized I was wrong to pressure Jason like that.

So this is our first indication that Pete called Bryce that night. Funny how I never would have imagined he would do that.

"I was about to push my way through them when I heard someone behind me. Jordan yelled, 'now' and that's the last thing I remember from that day."

We have to speculate that someone hit Pete on the head with the bat (or something, I mean, he did end up in a coma). If DA Pratner is smart, he will address that "now" comment on re-direct.

"Jordan screamed when you nearly broke his wrist, isn't that true?"

LMAO, you just have to love the way that defense attorneys twist the truth around. I so want to smack this guy six ways to Sunday.

Yeah, I used this to flesh out that night a bit. Bryce wouldn't be much of a best friend if he wasn't the one Peter turned to when he needed to talk, would he?? - - - Don't worry, what happened after 'Now' get's addressed. Remember, he can't take Peter down and throw up the cooperating witness, then put Peter back. It would certainly be easier to present a case like that, then have defense call them all back on cross, but that's not how it's done. -- -- -- As for twisting, um yeah, it takes a certain touch to do that with ease. One does want a certain spin on things doesn't one?? 0:)
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Colmar's threats were totally out of line and the sheriff's response regarding courtroom seating was great. Peter did outstanding. I did read the prior series and your response to my prior comment, so I remember the basics. I guess I was just expecting more drama in the first chapter. This chapter went much better in my estimation.

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On 08/22/2011 11:49 AM, Daddydavek said:
Colmar's threats were totally out of line and the sheriff's response regarding courtroom seating was great. Peter did outstanding. I did read the prior series and your response to my prior comment, so I remember the basics. I guess I was just expecting more drama in the first chapter. This chapter went much better in my estimation.
Dave, understand one thing, I very much appreciated your comments. If there are problems and no one says so I'm the naked emperor and no one's telling me the truth. So I hope you knew I wasn't be defensive. Now, with this review - I see better what you were saying was lacking in chapter 1. I think to the extent it lacked wow details, it further got bogged down in the wrangling between judge and defense counsel. Hopefully the remaining chapters are more like chapter 2 than 1 - and I will say that I am looking at 3-6 again with your other comments and these in mind. I want to make sure I keep the right balance. So thanks as always - I appreciate them. -- -- Andy
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Felt like I was going through an episode of The Good Wife lol, I really enjoyed reading this and you do an awesome job of writing a courtroom scene. I know there might probably be twists coming, but I don't see how Jordan can get off in this. I can't wait for him to take the stand and see how the defense will try to twist everything and make him look like the victim. I found this part really strange:

 

"How long have you and Jason been dating?"

 

"It will be two years in October."

 

"Are Darryl and Dean a couple?"

 

"Objection." Rankin stood up."

It was a very valid question and I really can't think of any reason why the defense chose to object except maybe to get his voice heard. Now if it was the defense asking the question and the prosecution objecting, I could understand.

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On 08/25/2011 08:36 AM, Percivial said:
Felt like I was going through an episode of The Good Wife lol, I really enjoyed reading this and you do an awesome job of writing a courtroom scene. I know there might probably be twists coming, but I don't see how Jordan can get off in this. I can't wait for him to take the stand and see how the defense will try to twist everything and make him look like the victim. I found this part really strange:

 

"How long have you and Jason been dating?"

 

"It will be two years in October."

 

"Are Darryl and Dean a couple?"

 

"Objection." Rankin stood up."

It was a very valid question and I really can't think of any reason why the defense chose to object except maybe to get his voice heard. Now if it was the defense asking the question and the prosecution objecting, I could understand.

Thanks for the review P. As for the bit you cited, I have to say, I'm not so sure it is relevant. It adds context for sure, but how does it make an element of the crime more or less clear? I think a Judge would let it in for context and that it is not being offered for the truth, but testimony has to be relevant to the elements charged. NOW if they were a couple it might be more relevant, but I had Rankin object because it was an iffy point, one where he could legitimately make an objection that even if denied, disrupted Martin's flow AND it got the Jury thinking that was an important point = or at least maybe they would, so much so they might miss something more important in the next couple questions. But you were pretty much dead on - Rankin did it to hear himself talk and to disrupt the Prosecutor. Probably way too much for what you asked - sorry.
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I have been gone for a week to the mountains - no consistent Internet, so I am just now getting to this. What a great chapter. The only thing I would say is that the direct was too short for a real trial of this magnitude, and the cross would never have been completed in such a short time frame. I know, you couldn't drag it on too long for the story, but you should have suggested that there were more questions, and over a extended time frame. The dialog was great. Peter was a great witness, and the defense had no idea what to do to him. They did keep mischaracterizing the testimony, and I was disappointed with the last one Peter let go, about him inciting the incident at the Mall in January. But, as all trials must go, I am sure that there will be twists, unexpected pitfalls, and attempts by the "weak" defense to mislead the jury with "red herring" that is not accurate or relevant. Thanks for the good chapter!! Keep them coming. GR, Esq.

 

 

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On 08/28/2011 10:14 AM, GeR said:
I have been gone for a week to the mountains - no consistent Internet, so I am just now getting to this. What a great chapter. The only thing I would say is that the direct was too short for a real trial of this magnitude, and the cross would never have been completed in such a short time frame. I know, you couldn't drag it on too long for the story, but you should have suggested that there were more questions, and over a extended time frame. The dialog was great. Peter was a great witness, and the defense had no idea what to do to him. They did keep mischaracterizing the testimony, and I was disappointed with the last one Peter let go, about him inciting the incident at the Mall in January. But, as all trials must go, I am sure that there will be twists, unexpected pitfalls, and attempts by the "weak" defense to mislead the jury with "red herring" that is not accurate or relevant. Thanks for the good chapter!! Keep them coming. GR, Esq.

 

Thanks George, hope the trip was good. The direct was much longer, I ended the scene with Martin saying, let's talk about your prior encounters. As for cross, I struggled with this. I agree and disagree with that it would be longer - though more of me agrees. I remember one trial I had - kidnapping case - where I didn't ask more than 10 questions of the defendant - and I know that is different than being the defense lawyer cross examining the victim. But after about 5 questions, I realized the defendant was very well coached and I wasn't going to get that 'ah ha' moment from him so I sat down. I think the art of cross is knowing whether or not you can get the witness to break or you have something you can use against him if you can pin him down. Sometimes you can't and you're better off stopping - which limits redirect as well. BUT you're assessment is probably right on - in real life 'Rankin' would have done more, maybe a lot more. But then again, maybe that doesn't fit his defense theory. :whistle: Not that I know what's gonna happen later mind you. 0:)
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I thought Peter's testimony was great. He really kept it together and said the right things, I felt proud :)

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On 10/20/2011 07:00 PM, intune said:
I thought Peter's testimony was great. He really kept it together and said the right things, I felt proud :)
Peter has always been a strong person, flawed perhaps, but certainly has a strength to his character. I think all his friends were proud of him for not letting the 'hired' gun of the person who tried to kill him get under his skin :)
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