Tibial groaned and wound his arms around Chad’s neck as Chad pounded into him, pressing him up against the wall with each thrust. Tibial moaned Chad’s name over and over in his ear, finally climaxing with a long drawn out cry, everything tightening and burning for a long shivering moment, then he fell limp against Chad’s body. Chad lowered him slowly to the ground, cradling Tibial gently in his lap.
"You okay?" Chad asked, his voice torn between amusement and genuine concern.
"Mmm. Yeah." Tibial lifted his head, kissed Chad before sliding off his lap, wincing slightly.
"Did I hurt you?"
"In a good way," Tibial promised, stretching. "But I'll probably have bruises from the way you kept banging me up against that wall."
"Sorry," Chad said, getting to his feet and giving Tibial another kiss.
"Don't be. I loved every second I spent earning them."
Chad smiled and pulled on his jeans. "Why don't you get cleaned up and I'll start dinner."
Tibial came back from the other room a few minutes later, cleaned up and fully dressed, his color still high. He sat down at the counter separating the kitchen from the living room.
"What are you cooking?" Tibial asked.
"Chicken stir-fry,” Chad told him. “That okay?"
"Is it spicy?"
"Then it's perfect," Tibial said. He slid off the stool he had perched on and approached Chad, kissed him on his upper back. "I love your back," Tibial said, tracing his tongue over the hard edge of one shoulder blade. "I like how when you move, you can see the muscles moving and flexing underneath your skin." He wrapped his arms around Chad's midsection, ran them up his torso and chest. He could feel the way Chad's breath hitched, the way he shivered slightly when fingertips passed over his nipples. "Of course, I like your front too," he added, pressing up onto his toes a little to kiss Chad's neck. Chad turned and kissed him.
"You better get your ass on the other side of that counter if you want to eat anytime soon," Chad murmured in between kisses.
Tibial kissed him again and broke away for air. "Is that where you want my ass?" he asked, a teasing smile on his face.
"If I told you where I want your ass right now, we'll end up against the wall again." Chad kissed him again, briefly, then turned away. "Go do your homework. If your grades slip from all this time you've been spending at the "library", your parents are going to wonder what's up."
Tibial sighed. "Fine fine." He sat back down at the counter, opened his book. "But it's hard to concentrate with that delicious sight in front of me."
Chad grinned. "If you finish all your homework before I get dinner fixed, I'll reward you."
Tibial looked up. "How?"
"Hmm." Chad took a minute to consider his options. "I'll give you fabulous head before you leave tonight."
Tibial stared at him, a blush creeping up his face. "And if I don't?"
Chad leaned on the counter. "Well, then you would have to be punished."
"Oh really?" Tibial looked curious. "And what would that entail?"
Chad's eyes looked him up and down, and Tibial felt heat creep into his face. "Oh, I'm sure I could think of something evil to do to that sexy young body of yours," Chad said, his voice low and full of dark promise. Tibial blushed a deeper shade of red. Chad chuckled and leaned over to kiss him again before starting on dinner.
Tibial looked down at his books and started to work. He finished up the last assignment right as Chad took the rice off the burner and breathed a sigh of relief. "Done," he announced.
"Good," Chad said, scooping some rice out on a plate. "Come on, dinner is ready."
Tibial got up and fixed his plate. Chad poured them both a glass of wine and they sat down on the sofa in the living room. Tibial took a sip of the wine. "Is this one of ours?"
"Of course. I wouldn't dare buy another brand."
Tibial felt a small twinge of guilt. Marwhile Wines were high quality, but high price. He didn't say anything though; it wasn't his place to tell Chad how to spend his money.
"Have you heard from your sister?" Chad asked.
Tibial smiled. "You mean that tantrum she threw after she came back from coming to see you? Yeah, I think everyone in the house heard it. What exactly did you say?"
"Simple. I told her that I wouldn't couple with her anymore because I was seeing someone else. That's the truth."
"That was pretty brave of you," Tibial said, thinking of Terrasa's sharp tongue and fiery temper.
"Nah, it was purely selfish. The only person I wanted writhing in pleasure underneath me is you," Chad said.
Tibial would never admit it, but the fact that Chad had turned down Terrasa; who was beautiful, experienced and charming when she needed to be; just because of this new thing that was developing between the two of them, had moved Tibial more deeply than anything else in his life had.
Terrasa had come to Tibial after being rejected, turning up the hurt sister routine so strongly that Tibial was instantly on guard, and proceeded to carefully probe him with questions about Chad, knowing that Tibial had to be a vague acquaintance if nothing else. Tibial had feigned ignorance and Terrasa had finally given up in a fit of exasperation. Ever since then, he felt nervous and taut with tension around her, sure that she must suspect something, but if she did, she showed no further sign of it.
"She asked me about you," Tibial said, finishing off his dinner.
"Yeah." Tibial picked up the wine and switched his position on the couch so his feet were resting in Chad's lap.
Chad rolled his eyes. "Why?"
"She thought I might know something. I asked her why and she said because we were friends, because I knew you. She drew that conclusion from the painting and the time I had spent over here for the...the thing."
"Does she have any idea of the kind of ritual I had to guide you through?"
Tibial shook her head. "No. She asked and my Dad made her stop questioning me."
"Do you think she's going to be a problem?" Chad asked.
"She wants you. She's already a problem."
"Goddess, I never knew you were so jealous."
Tibial's foot traveled across Chad's lap and pressed gently against the fly of his jeans. "Is that going to be a problem?" he asked, smiling sweetly. Chad groaned, back deep in his throat.
"Not if you keep on doing that," Chad said.
"What? This?" Tibial asked, pressing more firmly, his eyes wide and falsely innocent.
"Mmm. Just like that."
Tibial continued to massage him with his foot, keeping the pressure gentle and teasing, before running his foot up Chad's chest. Chad grasped his ankle, kissed the heel and leaned forward to kiss Tibial, slid his body up against his, hand traveling from ankle, over knee, to rest on his thigh. Chad could never tell Tibial how much he wanted him, how it burned so deep in his chest that it hurt. So he just made it his business to show him...over and over and over again.
* * *
Because Tibial ended up staying much later than he had planned on, Chad drove him home, parking discreetly down the street and watched Tibial walk the rest of the distance to his house, made sure he got in safely before driving away.
Lady Eva was still up when Tibial came inside. "You were out late tonight."
"Yeah, I know. I'm going to go and take a shower before bed. G'night."
"Are you hungry?"
"Got something to eat before I headed home. Thanks."
Tibial only felt the slightest twinge of guilt at lying to Lady Eva. But it was easier to pretend he was at the library, studying diligently, then tell her the truth about where he had been, even a half true, watered down version of it.
Besides, he reasoned as he stripped down and stepped under the warm spray of water, it was the truth. Most nights he did spend at the library, working on school related projects. But on Thursday nights, classes ended early and he could afford to spend some time with Chad, even if it was a couple of hours in the evening. Even on the rare occasions when they didn’t have sex, and just ate and talked, it didn't matter. What mattered was being with Chad, being able to see him, talk to him, hear his voice and feel his touch. Just to spend time with him. Tibial sighed and tilted his head back.
As much as he was fond of Mia, he knew he would never feel this way towards her. He didn't dislike spending time with her, even though she was unusually snappish and moody now that she was pregnant. Tibial knew that some women got depressed during pregnancy, and Mia had been very unhappy about giving up her favorite vice, coffee, but the doctor said she had to for the first trimester at least.
Tibial didn't know how long he could keep this up. He couldn’t carry on juggling Chad, Mia, school and the fear of being discovered. But right now, with the memory of Chad's hands and mouth on his skin fresh in his mind, buried deep where the rushing stream of hot water couldn't touch it, he was determined to somehow manage it.
* * *
“This is amazing,” Tibial told Mia, his footsteps echoing in the large empty space. He knew that Mia’s family was affluent, with her mother owning a large chain of pharmaceutical companies, but still couldn't believe what they and his own parents had done. He walked around the spacious apartment, awed by the quiet space that was now their own, wondering how long it would take to pay them back.
"It'll only be a couple of months until I am out of school and can find a job," Tibial remarked. "They didn't have to do this."
"They wanted to," Mia insisted. "My folks more than anyone else, they don't want another kid running around the house and both our families think that we should have our own place to raise a baby." Mia glanced at him. "They said we should consider it a gift for our coupling ceremony."
"So you want to have one?" Tibial asked.
"I think we should," Mia said. "I mean, I'm not going to couple with anyone while I'm pregnant, and you're not seeing anyone else I hope."
"Nope," Tibial lied.
"So what are we waiting for?"
Tibial kissed her. "Let me just finish school, alright? Then we'll have the money to do it the way you want. And I want to buy you a ring."
"Your parents have done enough," Tibial said. "I want this to be something I can do for you. Alright?"
Mia smiled. "You're sweet. Okay, we'll wait." She hugged his arm. "Let me decorate, okay?"
"Sure thing," he said, bending down slightly to kiss her again. "I have to get going soon."
Mia groaned. "Another study session? Baby, you already make top marks. Why all this extra work?"
"To make sure I continue getting top marks." He gave her a perfunctory kiss. “I’ll see you tomorrow morning, alright? Stop by for a few minutes.”
Mia brushed him off. “Don’t bother.”
“You’ve got school. I get it.” The bite in her voice made him flinch. “Just do whatever you have to do to get done. I’m sick of spending all my days alone.”
“I know,” Tibial said softly, guilt squeezing hard, the bitterness threatening to overwhelm and choke him. “I’m sorry.”
She smiled at him, over her shoulder, but refused to uncross her arms, refused to embrace him. "I know you are. Go on, I’ll be okay.”
“Are you sure? Mia, I-”
“Go on,” she said quietly, and turned back away from him until his footsteps had crossed the room and the door slammed shut.
She sighed and pressed her hands against the wall, leaning against them. She wasn’t being fair. Here he was, working so hard to get through school, so he could take up a good job and take care of her and the baby and she was resenting him for it, being jealous and selfish because she couldn’t have all of his time. He was with her, it was their child she was carrying in her body, what right did she have to be greedy of his time? After all, he was doing this for her.
Mia groaned and clapped her hands up over her face. She was a fool. She lowered her hands and shook her head. She would just have to find some way to make it up to him, then. She didn't want to be a bad wife. She wanted to make him happy.
Tibial sighed and raked his hands through his hair in annoyance. Usually he loved Saturdays. Saturday nights meant Chad. He could sneak over to see him once during the week, but would only get a few hours before he had to go back home. Saturday nights he had all night and a little bit of the morning. Mia thought he would be going to a study group and getting home late, his parents assumed he would be spending that time with Mia. It was a risky gamble that could be easily blown but right now it was all he had. But damn, he hated the lying! The secrecy and the fear that someone would find out what he was doing.
It was a fear so deep and pervasive that he had actually dreamed of it a couple times, saw his father’s look of stunned disappointment, his mother's of horrified shock, Mia and his sister wearing identical looks of angry disgust.
He would wake from the dreams shaking and cold down his very core despite whatever the temperature happened to be and would sit there, shivering usually until morning came.
It was times like that, in the darkness of the night, with the thought of his sin being cast into the open for everyone to see that he thought of breaking off this crazy affair, this gamble that couldn’t last forever, to settle for Mia and a family, to let himself believe that would be enough.
That faded, easily enough with the bright shades of morning sunshine and would be banished completely the next time he saw Chad. He couldn’t give Chad up, no matter what.
Chad was an addiction that kept him prisoner and God help the person who tried to take the needle away.
Tibial cast a nervous glance behind him to make sure no one he knew was around as he turned towards where Chad lived.
The apartment had brought on feelings of guilt and discontent. He was happy that he and Mia were moving into a place of their own, but what was coming up next?
Having a coupling ceremonies, a baby, getting a job? It was all building up to the same kind of family life his parents had. Where did his relationship with Chad fit into all of this?
It didn't and that was the problem.
How long could they keep it up? Until they died or got caught? Would it be like this all the time, clandestine meetings, excuses for not being at home, lying about where he was going, where he had been?
The unfairness infuriated him.
He was in love and it wasn't allowed. Even though he had filled the primary tenet of the Goddess and produced a child, it still wasn't allowed. He wanted nothing more than to be with Chad whenever he wanted and it wasn't fucking allowed, and why?
He stopped and took a deep breath. He was almost at Chad's place and he didn't want to show up looking upset, sulking childishly because he felt like life was treating him unfairly. Life treated everyone unfairly. He needed to get over it.
He knocked on the door, and when Chad opened it, he couldn't keep the smile from his face as they embraced, kissed in the shadows seconds before Chad pulled him inside to shut the door.
* * *
"What's wrong?" Chad asked, later. He was on his back, Tibial lying on top of him, his slight weight comforting. Tibial rested his head on Chad's chest, hearing the gentle muted sound of his heartbeat as Chad slowly ran his hand up and down his back.
"Nothing specific. Mia got cross with me."
"For coming over here?"
"Yeah. She wants to go ahead and get coupled."
Chad's hand paused for a moment, and then continued its gentle up and down stroke. "Is that so?"
"Yeah," Tibial replied. "Mia's parents and my own set up an apartment for us. I told her to wait until I get out of school."
Tibial picked his head up, kissed Chad, and then propped his head onto crossed arms so he could see Chad’s face. "I don't want to."
"I don't know. I don't feel right, vowing to love her when I love someone else. It's just another lie."
"So are you going to tell her no?" Chad asked, watching Tibial carefully.
"I've already told her yes."
Chad's hand dropped onto Tibial’s back. When he spoke again, his voice was low and soft, vibrating with a strange tone that Tibial had never heard before. "What are you trying to tell me? That you want to break this off, that you don't want to see me anymore?"
"No! Goddess, no."
"Do you want to leave?"
"What?" Tibial looked down at him with his eyes wide. "Like run away?"
"We can't do that."
"Mia's pregnant. I don't love her. Not like the way I love you, but I don't want to leave her. I promised I wouldn't. I want to be there for her and the baby."
"So what do you want to do?"
"I don't know."
"Well, I hate to tell you this, but your options are kind of limited."
"I know." Tibial looked troubled.
"Listen," Chad said, took Tibial's face in his hands. "I will go along with you no matter what you decide to do. But it's your life that you need to consider, and it's your decision to make. I can't tell you what to do but I'll support you no matter what."
"I wish I could hate her," Tibial whispered. "It would be better if I did."
Chad kissed the top of his head, then just let his lips rest there against his hair for a moment. "But you don't," he finally said. "I don't think you could hate anybody. That's why I love you."
Tibial's lips curved up into a smile. "That's the first time you said it."
"That you love me."
"Well, I do."
Tibial thought he would never be happier.
* * *
It was early morning, the moon out and the sun still not showing her face when Tibial woke up from a deep content sleep by a commotion right outside Chad's apartment. He propped himself up on his elbow, blinking sleepily, a little confused. He felt Chad sit up next to him, his hand coming up to rest on Tibial's arm before all hell broke loose.
The door of the living room crashed inwards and from the open bedroom doorway Tibial could see a small group of people coming into the apartment.
"What the-" Chad breathed angrily before the strangers, at least five of them, were filling the room. Someone grabbed Tibial bodily from the bed and he could hear someone else barking orders.
"Get the boy out of here! Subdue the deviant!"
"Come on, kid, let's get you out of here," the person who had lifted Tibial up said.
"Get off of me!" Tibial shouted, struggling, squirming in the grasp the stranger had on him. He managed to temporarily escape and dashed towards Chad.
Tibial reached out, fingers barely brushing against Chad's skin before someone roughly grabbed his arm, yanked him back hard enough to send Tibial tumbling to the floor.
Chad's eyes flashed in furious anger and he leapt forward, shouting, only to have hands pulling him back. Tibial struggled to his feet and watched with horror as one of the men struck Chad across the back of his head.
Tibial screamed Chad's name as he saw him collapse to the ground. Even as hands grabbed him, yanked Tibial away and carried him out of the apartment, Tibial could only continue to scream Chad's name.