September 21, 1991
It was 1am when we got back to the condo. I dragged Lou through the lobby and told the concierge it was OK that he was there this time, and then we were upstairs, through the door, and in my room.
“I looked all over the bar for you Marcel,” he cooed into my ear. “I want you so bad. Let me make love to you.” His lips were on mine, and his hands groped my body. Some top I am, I thought cynically, as I got ready to bottom again.
We pulled off our clothes and here he was, naked, in front of me. Of all the men I've known, Lou is still the most magnificent. It's not that he's more muscular than other guys, because he's not. It's not that he has a big dick. He does, a little bigger than mine, but it's not huge. It's not that he has the perfect ass or legs, he doesn't. The thing about Lou is that he's perfectly proportioned. He inherited and fostered that look that managed to bring together a bunch of really nice male features into the perfect male package. He was like a modern day David.
I pushed him back onto the bed and began to lick and suck on his body, but he was feeling playful and energetic, so he pushed me back and did the same thing, until we were wrestling, only instead of rough holds, there were passionate kisses.
I pulled him into a 69 position and moved up to his taint to inhale his smell. Like the rest of him, it was totally perfect; the ultimate blend of pheromones, and it just fueled my lust. He finally pulled off of me and took control just like Bruno had, rolling me over onto my stomach and rimming me like a pro. He was about to fuck me without a condom but I had enough sense to make him wear one. No way was I going to let a slut like him bareback me. Thinking of that reminded me of Max, and that threatened to make me sad enough to ruin my mood.
It didn't last though, as Lou penetrated me carefully. He was smaller than Bruno, so he slid in relatively easily. Still, I made it seem tougher than it was, squeezing my ass just a little bit and groaning in simulated pain, just to make him think I was still pure as the driven snow, so to speak.
Then he began to work his magic. As gorgeous as Lou was, in bed he was an animal. Once again, it wasn't any huge physical feature that did it, it was the natural way he moved his body, the way he pumped his hips, and his smooth way that combined to make him the perfect lover. I relaxed into him and let him cast his magic spell over me with his magic wand, allowing my mind, and all of my control, to leave my body and fly away, leaving only the pleasure center to enjoy Lou's ministrations.
When I came, it was a surprise; I was so detached from the whole thing. But I blasted my load across the bed, so intense was the orgasm and I felt Lou convulse along with me. We collapsed next to each other in the bed, both panting heavily. I lay on my back and Lou lay next to me, kissing the area behind my ear, one of my erogenous zones. He knew them all.
“Marcel, you must not get so mad at me. We are so good together. We make such beautiful music together.” He kissed me gently, and then stroked my chest with his right hand.
“I get mad at you Lou because you take advantage of me. It did not used to be this way. Remember when we first came over here from France?” My mind went back to those days, two horny teenagers who spent the entire night in bed fucking; only breaking for food.
“Those were good days,” he said with a smile. “I wanted to spend tonight with you. I am leaving tomorrow.”
“I thought you were here for the whole weekend?”
“My friends want to go to St. Louis. Skip has a friend there with a big house near the bars where we can crash for a few days, or weeks.” In other words, he was leaving and it was my fault because I wouldn't let his friends stay with us. Well so be it. No fucking way Teddie was staying in my condo.
“You will have a good time there. When are you getting off the circuit?”
He grinned. “I just got back on it baby. I just got back on it.”
“I guess a sexy man like you needs to share his body,” I teased.
“I am not the only sexy man in this room. I'm glad you are not joining us. The competition would be too tough. Jason, who is so picky it is obscene, was ready to have your baby.”
“He's a bottom?” I asked.
“Yes, can you believe it? He's the butchest bottom I've ever met.”
I smiled. “So why are you not chasing after him?”
“Because he is smart like you, and he knows how I am. We were together for a while, but I hurt him, like I hurt everyone around me.” He seemed so sad.
“You do not have to live this way Lou. This is a choice you make.”
“You are always trying to save me Marcel, to reel me back into the respectable world. You do not understand that I am wild, an untamed beast, that must hunt new men to fuck.” He was teasing, but telling the truth at the same time. Then his hand moved down to my dick and talking ceased, while lovemaking began.
I woke up in the morning to find Lou gone. I swallowed nervously and grabbed for my wallet. The credit cards were all there, but all of my money was gone. I shook my head sadly. So typical. I glanced over to my nightstand and noticed that my watch was gone too. I giggled a little bit at that. It was a Rolex; a fake one. I'd locked my real one up in my safe last night. When Lou tried to pawn that one he'd be in for a big surprise. Ironic that getting ripped off for about $700 made me happy. I got up and checked my safe just to be sure that he hadn't broken into that too. He hadn’t.
I spent the day just bumming around the condo, and then that night I decided to head back down to J-Bar. I liked the place, I had a VIP card, and I had no friends in town. I drove this time, pulling up to the special VIP entrance with valet parking.
“You're back!” Boyd said excitedly when he saw me. I let him give me a big hug and cop a feel. He was harmless.
“I am. I had too much fun to stay away.”
“You're probably looking for that hot guy you left with last night,” he said, letting me know he kept an eye on me.
“Not likely. He was only in town for one night. He is an old friend.” Besides, I'd bottomed enough for the weekend, I thought. “I'm going to go down and grab some dinner,” I said, and decided to check out the restaurant. The cute waiter took my order, some chicken bullshit thing, and I sat there taking in the sights as people walked by on the street. It was interesting to watch the guys. Some went by and snarled in, as if they were disgusted by a gay bar, while some just looked in curiously. The most interesting were the guys who were definitely interested but who tried to look like they weren't. The chicken was pretty good, and I was just finishing up when Bruno came up to the table.
“Mind if I join you?” he asked.
“I would love that,” I replied, beaming my smile at him.
“Thanks for pulling me out of my shell last night. I did a lot of thinking after that, and you're right. It's time for me to move on. All this time I thought that if I dated someone else, or let myself have fun, I'd be betraying him.”
I put my hand on his. “I'm glad I could help Bruno. It really makes me feel good to know that you're happier. Seriously though, you are a great dancer. Amazing. You planning to be around tonight?”
“Maybe,” he said, flirting. He was so cute.
“Good. Save me a dance or two.” He nodded. “You going to stick with the '70s garb?”
“Until the bar gets on its feet financially, I think so,” he said. “It's been pretty expensive lately.”
“What's the problem?” It was packed last night. They had to be pulling in a fortune.
“The landlord doesn't like gay bars, and he's raising the rent to try to get us to move out.” He looked pissed off.
“You mean you put all of this money into this place without a long-term lease?” I asked. Maybe I'd been around Stef too long, but this seemed like second nature to me.
“I have a clause that lets me buy the building for $800,000. I figured that would be enough of a guarantee. Unfortunately, no one wants to give me that big of a loan on a place in this gayborhood. So the landlord keeps jacking up the rent. I think the bastard wants to force me out. The building is worth more than that anyway.”
“So you need $800,000?” I asked. He nodded. “You want a partner?”
“You mean like a husband?” he asked nervously.
“No Bruno. You are cute, and a great lover, but I do not think I'd be able to walk if I let you fuck me like that on a regular basis.” He blushed and chuckled. “I meant a business partner.”
“You got that much money?” he asked, incredulous.
“Yep. Young, pretty and rich. And I cannot seem to find a steady boyfriend. What the fuck is that all about?” I joked.
“Wow Marcel. I felt something, a connection, when we first met last night, but I didn't know how much you'd change my life.”
I laughed. “I will tell you what. I'm going to go back upstairs and try to fuck one of those twinks on the dance floor. Give me a proposal, write something up, and we will go for it.” I gave him all of my contact info, and then headed back up into the club and up to the VIP section. I picked a seat next to the windows and studied the dance floor upstairs, and down.
A familiar face attracted my attention. Jason, the guy with Lou, was on the dance floor, rubbing up against some leather guy. I smiled, pulled off my shirt, and headed downstairs.
I stood on the edge of the floor, nursing a rum and coke, watching Jason move with this guy. He looked like he was having fun, but that he wasn't too into it. The leather guy was pretty big, with bulging muscles and lots of chains on his outfit. When the song was over he pulled Jason in and tried to kiss him, but Jason dodged him. Time to save my damsel in distress.
“Hey baby, I've been looking for you,” I said, walking up to him and kissing him on the lips. A little shock flew between us, and he smiled at me. “Hi,” I said, smiling at the leather guy. “I'm Marcel.”
“Butch,” he said, looking irritated. “I gotta go.” I smiled back at Jason.
“Butch? You were dancing with a guy named Butch?” He laughed with me, then the music picked up and we started dancing. “Why are you not in St. Louis?”
“That's not my scene,” he said.
“Oh yeah? Why not?” He got my curiosity up.
“Too many drugs, plus I know the guy they're staying with. Used to date him. He's a fucking sleazeball.”
“So you staying in Chicago?” I asked.
“You want me to?” he shot back, teasing. I just shook my head. “I'm here until tomorrow, and then I fly back to Dallas. School is starting up again.”
“So this is your last night in Chicago?” I asked.
“Yeah. Wanna make it memorable?” he said with a slutty leer. He turned to face away from me and ground his ass into my swelling groin. “Lou says you're a top.”
“And I hear you're a bottom.”
“Fuck yeah,” he said. “Give me a hard dick up my ass and I'm a happy boy.” For the first time since we'd started talking, I noticed a slight Texas drawl in his voice.
“I can do that. Come on,” I said, and led him to the cordoned area. “You got two choices. We can go back to my place and fuck in private, or go upstairs and have an audience.”
He got a huge grin. “I'm for upstairs.” We headed up and snagged one of the rooms with cushions and left the barriers down and the door open. I stripped off my pants and he did too. Damn he was handsome. Dark hair, a studly body, and long, long legs. I grabbed a condom and some lube and tossed them to the side of the cushion, and pushed him down onto his back and climbed onto him.
I began grinding away, rubbing our raw cocks together as if they were wrestling, just like our tongues as we kissed. I rolled off of him and got him onto all fours and dove into his ass. Most guys, I love the way they smell, the way they taste, but he was a little nasty, so I didn't spend too much time there. I wrapped my cock with a condom and lubed up his ass, then drove into him slowly but firmly.
We had drawn quite the crowd. The twinks from the dance floor came in and one of them bent over in front of Jason, begging him to lick his asshole. Jason dived right in. The other twink leaned underneath him and started blowing him. He was moaning now, right into that kid's ass. That should drive him nuts, I thought. I felt a hand playing with my ass and looked back to see Boyd touching me nervously.
“Is this OK?” he asked. I nodded and gave him a smile. His hands ran all over my ass, and soon I felt more hands on my torso as the middle aged guys moved in to cop a feel. I looked up to see one guy, probably in his late 40's, jacking a big dick over me while he squeezed my nipples. The twink getting rimmed looked back and saw him and moved his ass away from Jason and lined it up with this guy, and then they were going at it now. We'd started a veritable orgy.
All this time I was plowing into Jason's hot ass. He was nice, a good fuck, but I thought sadly that he was nothing like JP, and certainly nothing like Max. He started really moaning, getting closer and closer. One of the guys watching us and stroking his cock started to shoot and blasted his load all over Jason's back. Another guy followed him and another guy after that. That sent Jason over the edge, and he came into the hot mouth of the twink that was still blowing him. He pulled away from me, finished, which kind of disappointed me. I mean, if a guy was fucking me and I came, I'd let him finish.
As soon as he pulled away, cum dripping down his back, the twink that was blowing him lay down in front of me and pulled his legs up, offering me his hole. I drove into him now, and started pounding away with a desire to blow my wad. Other guys were jerking off, watching us, and started blowing on him. He must be a little cum slut, because he scooped some of it off and licked it up. An older guy stuck his head in and started blowing the twink, and the visual stimulation was finally too much for me. I started blasting my load into the condom, smashing into his ass as I did.
As soon as I was done I pulled out and pulled the condom off, and dropped it into the cum slut's mouth. He slurped it up contentedly, while another guy moved up to fuck him some more. I looked around for Jason but he was gone, so I put my shirt on and headed home.
I felt dirty, sleazy. It was a pretty kinky scene. When I got back to my condo I took a shower and climbed into bed, thinking about how much I'd rather be here with a guy I liked, than there, with a hundred guys I didn't.
October 4, 1991
Normally when I worked out I went to the SPAC, the newest and nicest place on campus. Unless I was in a hurry, in which case I'd hit up the gym closest to the history department, Blomquist. But today I decided to head over to Patten. It was the oldest on campus, but it had a special attraction for me. It was the only gym that would have been around when my father went here, so it was kind of cool, doing bench presses, imagining that he might have been doing the same thing at the same place almost 30 years ago. That, and it was the closest to the Physics building, and that meant I might have a chance at running into Max.
School had been going really well. The classes seemed easy to me, probably because I'd gotten so much of the reading out of the way before the semester started. I knew that would change when papers and tests came due, but right now I was gliding.
On the weekends, I headed down to the J-Bar. I'd pumped the $800,000 into it as I promised, and I'd made some friends down there. $800,000 was a lot of money, so I'd consulted with Stef. He suggested that I buy out the building itself and not invest directly in the bar. Stef thought that bars were a pretty risky business, and he was right. So this way, I got a good deal on the real estate and cut Bruno a hell of a deal on the lease too. J-Bar was a good place to go and get off, but that was about it. The loud music, the focus on sex, seemed to make it a bad place to meet a boyfriend. So I just fucked everyone I could instead. That made me smile.
I talked to JP on the phone once or twice a week, nice calls, but our relationship had evolved into a friendship and I no longer pined away for him. In fact, I didn't usually think about him when I jacked off. There was really only one star in those fantasies, and I was hoping he'd be here in the gym today.
I started at 2:00pm and stretched my routine out for as long as I could, but by 4:00pm I was worn out, and he hadn't shown up. I sighed. It had been a long shot anyway. I took a shower and headed home, got changed, and went down to the bar. I drove up to the valet section but none of the valets were around, so I impatiently parked on the side street instead.
The first guy I ran into was Sparky, the little blond twink that I'd fucked after Jason. “Hey Marcel. You up for some fun later?” he asked with a leer.
“We will see Spark,” I said.
“Hey, you want an E?” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a little white pill. “Try this. You'll love everyone.” Then he bounded off. I stared at it, wondering whether to take it or not. I'd seen guys on ecstasy and they looked like they were having a blast. I avoided drugs, well, except pot, but I didn't really consider that a drug. I put it on the same level as alcohol. Drugs always scared me. I'd been down to the main sports complex a couple of times to gaze at my father's picture on the wall. He'd let drugs destroy him, and hurt the people around him. If it happened to him, maybe it could happen to me. Maybe addiction was a genetic thing.
Still, trying it once couldn't hurt, could it? Besides, I was in a safe place, a place where people knew and liked me. I stood there watching the action for about half an hour, weighing my options, until I finally popped the pill in my mouth and washed it down with a swig of my beer. I grabbed a seat at my normal table, where I could look down at the dance floor and see the action.
Fifteen minutes later and I still felt nothing. What a complete let down. I finally decide to try exotic drugs, and they don't work. This was a good lesson, a lesson not to put shit like that in my body. It would only fuck me up, and leave me feeling no different. I glanced at my watch. Thirty minutes. Still nothing. I got up and headed downstairs.
Then it hit. A feeling of euphoria like I'd never experienced before. It was like the rush of an orgasm, only it was constant. I touched my arm and felt the skin tingle. I ran my hand over my nipples and felt them harden, and felt my dick harden too. Suddenly life was good, everyone was good, and I loved everyone. I went out onto the dance floor and just started dancing like a crazy man. Someone would touch me and it would feel awesome. I suddenly needed to be naked, to fuck someone, so I bailed on the dance floor and headed up to the VIP lounge.
I got up there and stripped off all of my clothes, my rock hard cock sticking straight out like a lance. I got some stares; that wasn't like me. I headed to the small dance floor and started dancing. The twinks were there, and so was another hot guy I hadn't seen before. He reminded me of Pete, only taller and much bigger. I danced with him, rubbing against him, feeling his hand on my ass, and my cock. But he was a top, so that wasn't going to work.
I moved on to the next guy I found, another new guy, only this guy was shorter. He was Asian, from which country I had no idea, with almost no body hair. I ran my hands over his smooth body and could tell by the way he was touching me that he was on E too. We danced together sensually, kissing and caressing, moving slow even when the music was fast. I dragged him off to the room with the mats and we made out for what seemed like forever. Every touch, every connection, was magnified.
He sucked me, then I sucked him, then he sucked me, then I sucked him. Something about this E stuff made me want to suck on things. I was finally so keyed up I couldn't take it anymore. I pushed him over onto his knees and knelt behind him, running my cockhead up and down his crack, making both of us moan. I put a condom on in a flash, slipped some lube in his hole, and pushed into him.
I felt him cringe a little bit, but in no time at all he was totally into it. His tight, sweet ass wrapped around my cock as I fucked him. Still, I needed something to suck. I looked up to see the first guy there, the guy that looked like Pete, his huge cock dangling in front of me. I didn't even hesitate a minute. I dove down on that monster and sucked it for all I was worth, fucking my Asian friend the whole time. Time seemed to stand still, this vignette, with my cock experiencing all kinds of stimulation from my Asian friend while I inhaled the redhead's cock.
Then suddenly I tasted something salty and realized that he was blasting down my throat. As soon as he was done, another guy was there, asking me to blow him. No problem. This guy was older, probably in his mid-30's, with a nice sized cock and dark blond pubes. I sucked him too, and when he was done, another guy replaced him. I blew four guys before I finally shot my wad into the condom, oblivious as to whether my Asian friend came or not.
Normally after acting like such a slut I'd have gone back home and showered, then felt like shit. Not tonight. Tonight I loved everyone. Tonight I was everyone's friend. I went back down to the dance floor wearing only my boxers, and danced like a freak.
Bruno was there and danced with me a bunch of times, probably more to keep me out of trouble than anything. I kept going and going, like a whirling Dervish, until the lights came up. I looked at my watch and noticed that it was 2am. I was still wide awake, but there wasn't anything to do but go home. I got my pants, but once again my shirt was long gone. I headed to my car, deciding that I was in good enough shape to drive. I hadn't been drinking alcohol, and the effects of the E seemed to be wearing off.
I walked up to my car and had just hit the remote control to open the doors when I felt something hit my head really hard. I tried to turn around and look, but my body was on a different trajectory. I fell to the ground, conscious of considerable pain in my jaw when I landed. I tried to look up but couldn't, and when I did, the only thing I could see was my car driving away. Fuck. I crawled over to the curb and sat there. I figured I'd hail a cab but I had no wallet. I had no keys. I had no watch.
I stared up at the street sign and realized that I was only a few blocks from Max's apartment. I sighed. Not exactly the best of circumstances, but I knew he'd help me out. I forced myself to get up and walk, or stagger as it were, down a few blocks to his street, and then down about four more blocks to his apartment. I don't know how long it took me to shuffle down there at what must be 3am, but I made it. I walked into the foyer and rang his bell and got no answer. I rang it again, and again, and again.
I was about to ring it again when the door flew open and there was Lark, standing there in boxers, pissed as hell. “What the fuck do you want? It's three o'clock in the fucking morning.” I saw Max appear behind him.
“Jesus Marcel, what happened to you?” he said, pushing past Lark and guiding me in.
“You're inviting him in? At three in the fucking morning?” Lark screamed.
“Shut the fuck up Lark. Look at him. He's hurt. Get me a washcloth,” Max said.
“Fucking get it yourself,” he said, and stormed off to the bedroom. Max patted my shoulder and headed off and came back with a washcloth. He wiped my nose and jaw, and I looked down and saw my blood on it.
I swallowed hard. “I was at a bar and it closed, so I was walking back to my car. As soon as I hit the remote to open it, someone hit me on the head and knocked me down. I must have been out for a minute, because when I came to they had stolen my watch, my wallet, and my car.”
“Shit. That's fucking wrong,” he said. “We have to call the cops.” I nodded.
“I'm really sorry to barge in on you like this Max. I'm sorry if I woke you guys up. I did not really know where else to go.” I felt bad for that, and felt bad for letting him see me like this.
“Fuck that. You did the right thing. Now come on in here and lie down. I'm going to call the cops.” And he was wonderful. He helped me to the couch and got me an ice pack for my jaw. He lent me a shirt so I didn't look like a tweaked out raver. And when the cops got there, he sat with me the whole time while they took down my information.
I traveled light when it came to credit cards. A Visa, a MasterCard, and an American Express. After the cops left, Max helped me call all three of the companies and report the cards stolen. One of them, the AMEX, had been used to buy gas somewhere in the south side.
I guess taking the E was good in one sense. It gave me lots of energy. I looked at the clock and it was pushing 6am by the time I'd gotten all of that shit done. Max was sitting next to me, holding my hand. Despite all of the shit that happened, just being here with him was like heaven.
“Think you can give me a ride home?” I asked. “Or if you do not want to go out, can you spot me some money for a cab?”
“I don't have any money,” he said, and looked in the direction of the bedroom where Lark was sleeping soundly. “Come on, I'll drive you home.”
“Should you not leave Lark a note?” I asked, trying to be courteous.
He looked at me and seemed to have some sort of epiphany. “Fuck him,” he said, and smiled. We headed out to his roached out Honda and he drove slowly up the drive. I smiled at the contrast, this law-abiding physics professor driving a tweaked out grad student home.
He got to the condo and entered the code that I gave him, and parked in the same spot he had last time he came here. I wondered if he remembered, or if it wasn't as big of a deal to him as it was to me. “Here you are,” he said.
“You want to come up?” I asked. He hesitated, but I didn't want to lose him now. “I could use the help if you do not mind.”
“Sure,” he said, smiling. He put his arm around me to steady me as we walked to the elevator and headed up to the concierge. I had to explain the whole disaster to that guy, and he reluctantly went upstairs with us and let me into my own unit. I made a mental note to bitch like hell to the management about how rude the little bastard was. And then finally, I was home.
Max helped me to the couch and then made to leave. “Do you have to go right away?” I asked.
“I should get back,” he said.
“You that afraid of pissing him off?” I teased.
He shook his head in frustration and sat down next to me. “Good point. Let him worry about where I went for a change.”
“Does he do that to you? Just vanish?” He nodded. “Where does he go?”
“I don't know. If I ask, he gets pissed and reminds me that we're not a couple. Until he needs money. Then mysteriously enough, we are a couple.” He was different this time.
“I think you're almost ready to cut him loose,” I said.
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” he asked angrily, and made to get up to leave.
I held him down. “It means that it seems you're getting to the point where you've put up with his shit long enough and you're finally going to be free of the emotions that tie you to him.” I said it so sincerely that he got what I meant and took it the right way.
“Maybe you're right.”
“I missed you Max. Run away if you want to, but I missed you.” I felt tears well up in my eyes and tried to stop them, but too much had happened, and I was down from my trip.
“It's OK Marcel. I missed you too. And it was a real shitty thing that I did to you, the way I just blew you off like that.”
“It was,” I agreed. “You owe me.”
“Didn't I make it up to you by helping you tonight?” he asked, teasing.
“Nope. Not even close. You promised to take me out to dinner.”
He got nervous and uncomfortable. “I can't do that for a few weeks. I don't have the money for it.”
“I do not give a shit about the money. I will pay. I just want you to be there.”
“Just me huh? And do I have to let you fuck me again too?” He was flirting now.
“Look at you, pretending like you do not want me to. You tell me you had a shitty time when I fucked you and that you never want me to fuck you again, and I will stop hitting on you.”
“How about if I pick you up tonight at 7pm?” he asked. I grinned, a huge grin, and I couldn't stop.
“How about if you just stay here and spend the whole day with me?” I asked.“I'll be back at 7pm. Wear some clothes this time,” he teased. Then he leaned in and gave me a kiss, a nice kiss. And then he left. Only this time, he told me he'd be back.