The Reluctant Master - 9. Chapter 9

Marc

From Marc: Brainy, active achiever, seeking a coach with insight and strength.

From Alan: My specialty: brainy, active achievers taught not to come. I strip you down, take you to the edge of orgasm, and keep you there, grinning, for several hours.

From Marc: I will be very responsive to your attention as described. (I am hard now reading your words, but will not touch my cock until you allow it.) I stay very hard and will come on command. When I shoot after edging toward orgasm over a couple of hours, I shoot long and hard.

From Alan: OK then, don’t touch your dick until tonight, when you’re ready to go to sleep. Then strip, lie on your bed comfortably in the dark, and stay hard as long as it keeps you happy. Then shoot, and enjoy yourself.

From Marc: Thank you for the guidance. I feel your invisible hand on me, with me. I have strapped my dick down with a jockstrap, but it’s still pushing at a hard 45 degree angle, bobbing up and hurting from the restraint. When I free it to piss, I have to piss in the shower because it’s pointing hard up at an angle. Do I have permission to piss on myself in the shower before I go to bed?

From Alan: Pissing on yourself is self-demeaning, but you can stand naked in the kitchen, piss into a measuring cup, and note the amount. What you do with the liquid afterward is your concern.

From Marc: That’s a much better idea. Sorry for my mistake. I have been holding it for almost 2 hours. I’ll let go now.

From Alan: You can’t make a mistake when you’re in your own house. It’s your body. But you can just do dumb, dick-driven things. But that’s what masturbation is for – to let you have a normal life. Now, no jock, keep loose pants on, keep your hands off yourself for the rest of the day, go out with friends, go to dinner, go to a movie, and come home and masturbate tonight.

From Marc: Thank you. As instructed. I have no underwear on under running sweats. I’m going to run along the river with a friend. I do have a leather snap strap that I am going to keep on my dick so that my balls are up against my dick when I run. My running partner is a tall, blond, blue-eyed fuck buddy who will understand that I can’t play today.

From Alan: Poor guy: getting all sweaty and then not being able to play with you. I know it’s your body, but when you make promises to someone else, you’ve got to keep them. Let him play. But you are following instructions, so shoot away happily. Then don’t touch your dick for another 24 hours – unless you’ve promised another of your fuck buddies to play.

From Marc: Thank you for releasing me. I shot up and out a good four feet, cock jerking and me smiling. I do have a buddy who’s expecting a good fuck tomorrow, and he’ll appreciate how much I enjoy taking your instruction. I feel the comfort of your focus and will sleep well.

From Alan: Then your fuck tomorrow is the one orgasm you’re allowed – unless you can manage more at a single go. And you’d better make it good because you’re not allowed another orgasm for another day.

From Marc: I had plans to meet up with my blond running buddy on Tuesday. But he’ll understand that I can deep throat his blond cock as long as I don’t come. And sorry to be stupid, but is it ok to drink his cum if I don’t cum?

From Alan: You can do anything you please. Remember, it’s your body. But if you don’t shoot on Tuesday, you can set someone up for Wednesday. If you don’t shoot then, you can set someone up for the next 24 hours.

From Marc: Understood. Thank you. And do you know what you’re doing? With just your words, I’m feeling pulses of desire in my chest and dick and under my balls to my hole. You’re tapping into a hunger that I didn’t know was there.

From Alan: I’m not creating anything that wasn’t there all along. Simply listening to your schedule with your friends makes it seem like you’re naked all the time. By restraining that a bit, you’ll find yourself riding a natural high. The trick is to extend that high as long as you can, and that’s based around your taking control of your body. So mess around all you want, but try to pace how often you shoot. Just don’t lose any friends in the process.

From Marc: If I weren’t feeling what you just explained, I wouldn’t believe you. And I’m just beginning to grasp this. How is it that a horny, active, spoiled brat like me could have missed this? What may I do to thank you for your attention?

From Alan: You thank me by discovering the abilities your body has given you. It’s the difference between jerking off and sensual sex. They both make you happy, but the first is over in 10 seconds and the second can get you through the day. Sometimes, guys have to be tied down at first – to keep them from grabbing their dicks. But you’ve noticed the changes almost immediately and want to keep them. So play with that high. You can increase it by being aroused without shooting, and you can end it immediately by getting off. Sometimes, both are useful.

From Marc: But I would enjoy your ropes on my body, making the decision where to cross, where to tie, where to knot. Am I too greedy?

From Alan: Maybe.

From Marc: For my next lesson, when should I resist sex and when should I have it but resist orgasm?

From Alan: Since you’re sucking off your buddy off tonight, while trying not to come, again, wait 24 hours. If you happened to come spontaneously tonight, with your friend, wait 48 hours. But, as I’ve said, you’re welcome to stay hard as often as you can, and it will just increase your control.

From Marc: Your instructions have fit my schedule like a glove. Monday was an intense session with a friend I see about 5 times a year. He’s patient and plays with each part of my mind and body. We came together after a couple of hours. Yesterday was only oral, and I was happy to bring my friend off while I pulled back. I’m proud to write you this morning, knowing you’d be happy with that. Today, I’m working hard and won’t meet up with anyone. I have a pulsing hard dick now, as I write, but feel your mind touching me and telling me to wait.

From Alan: So if you didn’t come Tuesday, and you had a busy day today, you should probably shoot now and get a good night’s sleep. Then tomorrow, let me know what you’ve planned for the weekend, and we’ll figure out a strategy.

From Marc: Good. I’ve been waiting for your word. I’ve been busy all day with work, so was barely thinking about my dick. But I spent some part of the afternoon wondering when I was going to hear from you. My hand is cradling my cock now, with welcome attention. Also, sorry to bother you with this question tonight, but I have a hike in the mountains with a man who will fuck me in a cave we use very early in the morning, at sunrise, so please advise.

From Alan: Ah, yes: to be fucked in a cave at sunrise. Who could pass that up? If you haven’t already come, I’d tell you to wait till then. But I suspect you already have, and you’ve been patiently waiting to do that, so you deserve to anyway. So I’d come tonight, sleep well, and then enjoy being fucked in the damp dawn light. Now what other natural wonders do you plan to explore this weekend?

From Marc: Thank you. I did sleep well and am looking forward to the hike. It’s still early enough now that the last of the moon’s light will guide our way, and then in just an hour, bright sun will flood the cave, with the trees offering little shade. You didn’t specify if I should come in the cave, so I will assume that I should resist. The rest of my weekend may be a bit of catch as catch can. I have a very close friend arriving to stay with me, along with his new French boyfriend. I certainly won’t want to invade that newly romantic space, but I will be as accommodating as they need me to be.

From Alan: Nah, come in the cave. Preferably naked. And, yeah, resisting the urge to get involved with young romantics this weekend, while watching and not coming, should keep you happily distracted.

From Marc: Thank you. Just got back. Did come in the cave, with my hiking boots and socks on, feeling the chill of the air while the sun warmed my butt. Very happy that you had read my mind and gave me your invisible hand of approval. Again, very grateful for your continued guidance.

From Alan: Good you came in the cave. Don’t want to waste all that nice rock. Good you were mostly naked, too. No sense messing up your hiking shorts. Now, if you want to play games with yourself all weekend while you entertain your guests, wear loose pants, don’t wear underwear, and don’t touch your dick. Just let it go where it wants. Don’t touch it to piss or shower, either. See if you can keep your hands off it till Monday morning, then come again before you try to work. Of course, if your dick just goes off spontaneously, or if some nice guy wants to have sex with you, there’s no point passing that up.

From Marc: Thank you. I will keep a sort of journal for you. You may wish that my hands were bound and mouth gagged, so that I wouldn’t talk / write so much. (I know I wish that.)

From Alan: I’ll be happy to follow your journal because it will give me useful information to guide you. And I suspect that I’d never need your hands tied or mouth stuffed unless that takes you to a place you want to reach.

From Marc: I have worked at my computer for most of the day today. But got a text from a fuck buddy that I haven’t seen in about 13 years. Colombian, now living in Florida. We shared a bed on a business trip during a small San Francisco earthquake. I remember his full playful cock, the way it was uncut and had a perfect ball shaped head, under the hood. I also remember the way he fucked me on the bed so that gradually my head dropped so that I was staring at the box springs. I was traveling a lot for business then and we met all over the world. Once, in a bar in Belgium, we promised to never drift a part. But we did. I can’t wait to see him tonight. A genuine top, he can only have grown into his gentle strength. I know that we will explore old territory with some vigor.

From Alan: Have fun with your friend tonight, and make your time together last as long as you can.

From Marc: Last night, my come spilled out onto the bed before I reached orgasm, then I shot three times with such release that I felt that I was freed at long last. You have pulled back a skin from my skin. A revelation for me, possibly old news for you. “Hands off” my cock, your simple instruction, is helping develop a new layer of sensation throughout my body. Feeling more. Thank you. Teach me more. Please.

From Alan: It’s dumb, but it’s mostly a matter of slowing down and appreciating every sensation, trying to make what you’ve been doing since you were in your teens seem unfamiliar. I don’t know how sexually adventuresome you’ve been over the years, but you sure aren’t shy now, so I suspect you’ve done a lot. That’s great because you’re not afraid of experimenting. Now, do some easy experimenting just by yourself. Lie naked, comfortably, on your back, in the dark, with no music and no other distractions. Spend on hour slowly exploring all of your body, repeatedly, with your fingertips, touching everything but your dick and balls. You can get hard, but don’t act on it. Then go to sleep.

From Marc: I have been busy with a very full house, but I finally got some time alone just now and I tried a variation on your recommendation. It was in the high 30s here this morning and my guests left early. I went outside naked, walked in the cold grass to a hot tub heated to the 90s, and then I lay half-floating in the tub, touching my body, but leaving my hard cock untouched. Alone now, writing this, I am hard again.

From Alan: Exploring your body while floating in a hot tub is as useful as doing the same thing while lying in bed. Now just keep at it, moving slowly, to see what kind of responses the various connections bring. And when did you last come? I’ve lost track. Friday night with your Columbian friend? If so, you should probably shoot tonight, so you can relax and sleep. If you had sex Saturday or Sunday, then wait till just before you go to sleep on Tuesday night. But, as always, you can take yourself to the edge as often as you please, preferably without touching your dick and balls. That still gives you plenty of skin to explore.

From Marc: Again, thank you for your continued attention. I sometimes want to think that I am your only disciple, but that cannot be true. I have not come today or yesterday but have edged very close. Looking forward to release tonight, as you have authorized.

From Alan: Actually, there are very few people who can take instruction this way, so that’s a compliment to your self-discipline. Now, tell me what your sexual plans are for this week, so we can figure out how often it would be good for you to come. I’d like to see you go a week without shooting some time soon, just to see what it does to your level of awareness. But for you, it seems that going a week without sex would disappoint a lot of other men. So for the moment, the compromise is to see how many times you can take yourself up to the edge and still back off. The goal is a kind of prolonged, rolling orgasm, the type women can have, which can keep you grinning for more than the usual time. But that’s hard to manage, and I don’t have the patience anymore.

From Marc: I am up early to work this morning and am pleased to be directed to sit down and think through this week’s sexual plans. As always when I write you, I feel the awakening in my groin that signals, little by little, that I am awakening an important part of me. Would it be too greedy to ask for a picture of you?

From Alan: I’d like to avoid sending you a picture. You need to think about yourself. And let me know when you’ve thought through your week’s plans, and I’ll see if I can enhance them. Meanwhile, keep your hands off your dick and balls and use touching the rest of your body to arouse yourself to the edge of orgasm. Do that as often as is useful. And let’s see if we can keep the times you come always connected to other guys. That should help you make your plans.

From Marc: No picture? Hmmmmm. I guess I misunderstood what you are about.

From Alan: I won’t send you a picture of me naked, if that’s what you were expecting. It would serve no purpose. You know what guys’ bodies look like, and it’s better for you to think about the ones you can touch than the ones you can’t. Beyond that, I don’t understand what you’re misunderstanding. Could you explain?

From Marc: It’s just that I have found such a mind-opening guidance from you that I thought you would trust me with your pic. Have you been burned by other guys online?

From Alan: I haven’t been burned by guys on the web because most aren’t interested in carrying on the kind of extended conversation we have. And I trust you, but I have a kind of public career, one that doesn’t easily include naked men. My job’s rather ordinary and easily guessed, and I’d like to keep doing it for a while.

From Marc: Thank you. You are giving me something that I want to develop, and I appreciate this candor. I am in a moderately high profile job, working in business. It is also important for me to be discreet because of my 13 year relationship with a great guy. While my sexual adventures are not off-limits to the relationship, I never would want to do anything to hurt my partner. As for sex this week, I am working very hard against some deadlines before things become quiet for the holidays, so will have little to report for a couple of days. I have never actually hooked up with someone from this site, but have the opportunity to do so on Wednesday. But I am unsure.

From Alan: It’s probably just as well that you haven’t met someone from this site as you seem to have a lot of friends. Trying to juggle them around your partner while also following my instructions sounds exhausting. But sex is sex, and if the guy on Wednesday seems interesting enough, then it’s obviously your call. As for your relationship with me: just be careful that you don’t accidentally turn me into another man you want to have sex with. That would make me less useful to you than I’m presently being.

From Marc: Well said.. Also, few people call me Marc – I have a nickname – but good friends do, so I’m glad I introduced myself to you that way. And I was almost hoping that you would tell me not to see the Wednesday guy. I am feeling stoic today.

From Alan: As I said, it’s your call: if you don’t want to see the guy, don’t. Or tell the guy in advance that you can’t come or be fucked, and that you can only suck him off. If he still wants to see you, then you’re kind of stuck, and you’ll have to be stoic. Otherwise, apologize that you’re suddenly busy at work, which sounds like the truth. But it seems like you’re too experienced to have sex with guys you really don’t want to, and it doesn’t sound like you want to have sex with this one. What’s his name on this site, by the way, if you’re not uncomfortable telling me? Maybe I know something about him – like “Jesus, you wouldn’t want to pass up the chance to be with him.”

From Marc: You hit the nail on the head: I really don’t want to have sex with him. Now why did I need you to tell me that? But it helped. I just landed a big contract at work, which means my mind moves away form sex, though I got hit on by a 27 year old yesterday. Very nice looking, saying all the right things, but I don’t really want that. What I want is your experience and tough guidance.

From Alan: Twenty-seven-year-old guys are cute. So are sixteen-year-old boys, and they’re fun to see naked, if only to remember what we used to look like – or wanted to – at their ages. But you see naked guys in the gym all the time, and most of the younger ones have no technique when you’re actually having sex with them. Still, it’s flattering that one gave you his attention. Also, something I’ve been thinking about since you told me: why don’t you try to only have sex with your partner for the next seven days?

From Marc: Good idea. Thanks. You have my commitment on that. Also, the first day / night, of sex with just my partner is going great. I forgot how ruff and ready he can be. I owe you some big present someday.

From Alan: Great. See if you can maintain that energy with him all week. You can do anything you want, as often as you want, as long as it’s with him.

From Marc: I am rediscovering how I can find what I need in him. He is a true dominant top and can be both rough and loving while always strong. Where you have helped me is in enjoying complete sexual feelings in ways that are not just fucking. Like most relationships that have survived more than a decade, the actual hardcore sex is less, but you are showing me that wonderful feelings come from more than orgasms.

From Alan: Now just don’t push him for sex seven nights this week, or he’ll wonder what’s happening and what’s been happening previously. And abstaining between sessions of sex with him, but taking yourself to the edge when you’re alone, should make your time with him even more intense.

From Marc: You are a needed and trusted lead, and I follow.

From Alan: I certainly don’t mean to enforce the idea of fidelity in marriage. You just didn’t tell me you were partnered until a few days ago, and that changes how I think about your approach to sex. You have a certain responsibility to your partner, especially not to mess up your relationship. But within that, there’s room for your separate desires, and that may involve keeping yourself absolutely ready for your partner or for the next man you choose to be with. It’s like having the spontaneity of being seventeen again, except this time, you’re controlling what happens rather than letting your body do it.

From Marc: That’s really the challenge, isn’t it? Keeping cock and mind in balance. There are times, like when a 27-year-old comes on to you, but your dick says “no.” And I have learned to listen to that glorious unruly cock. Then there are times when your dick is hard and needs release, but I am learning that I can make that urge into something bigger and better. Something more in touch with my tingling, feeling body and mind.

From Alan: That’s the game – playing the hard dick. Sometimes, it doesn’t even need to be hard for you to be aroused. That’s great because it makes it easier for you to function. Still, it’s good to keep yourself alert. Up to a point, it making the final release more intense. Then there’s a lull, where you sometimes feel you’re never going to need sex again. Then there’s a steady build. It’s easier to stay somewhere before the lull, but if you can ease just past it and control the build on the other side, it’s neat.

From Marc: How do you know this? You’re helping me be alert again, which feels fresh and mischievous. I can’t identify the lull you describe, but I know that sometimes the sex I have could almost be described as compulsive. Which makes it an empty punching bag.

From Alan: How to describe the lull? If you deprive yourself of sex, or are deprived of it for some time, you just want it more. But after a certain amount of time passes without release, even your arousal goes into suspension. That’s the lull. You don’t want sex, don’t miss it, and don’t expect to ever have it again. But if you gently ease yourself out that dead period – sometimes just by reconnecting with the rest of your body – then the craving can be fierce, and you’re almost high all the time. Still, you have to be careful to pace your eventual release, or it will seem too quick and disappointing. How do I know this? It’s weird, but even when I’m having sex, I’m also watching. So I’m always learning. And I’m often surprised that – for as much as guys seem to want sex – they know so little about how it makes their bodies behave. That’s why their sex is so dick centered.

From Marc: Your mind is like mine, only you’ve developed it further in this area. I’m also keen on observation, and I’m always learning. I have a very close straight friend who is my business partner. He is a tall, lean, big-dicked leader who is also a focused, ambitious researcher. He’s 8 years younger but has never an object of my sexual attention. But I have been a very close brother to him and I truly believe that “by his student, a teacher is taught.” So I have learned so much about men’s bodies from him. Not only does he talk me through each adventure, but also his moments of loneliness. And he introduced me to Brikram, the founder of Biram yoga, which is held in rooms at over 130 degrees.

From Alan: Yoga is a terrific way to learn about your body. Shock also works that way. Your walking through the high 30s chill and then jumping into the hot tub was absolutely about arousal. Now, why isn’t your friend married? What’s he looking for that’s beyond his reach? Of course, he’s only in his mid-thirties, and he may be as focused on business as you are.

From Marc: That’s it, exactly – he uses sex as a release from business, and his sex sometimes seems as intense as his negotiations. But he knows he needs to make some changes soon. As for me, I had one of the sexiest winter day sessions ever – and it was with my partner. He was surprised, and so was I! When I first met him, I had a fireplace in the bedroom. Well, we have a new house under construction, but I was able to build a fire. And we played with all the saw horses and tools in the heat/chill, with a cold rain pounding outside.

From Alan: That just makes me jealous, and I want to have been there.

From Marc: See, that’s why I wanted a picture of you. In some tiny way, you’re thinking about me.

From Alan: I guess I am. You got me.

From Marc: Good. It’s always great to get the master. It’s that student teaching teacher thing.

From Alan: Then go on teaching.

From Marc: Sorry I haven’t written for a while. I’ve been one chaste guy lately, working hard on a huge project. Attached is a glimpse of my pure white butt. My partner took it, and he knows who I’m sending it to.

From Alan: You have a nice ass. Not exactly what we want to be remembered for, but nice. Thank you and your partner.

From Marc: He says, “You’re welcome.” And I hope you don’t take this the wrong way, but after being in solo harness for a couple of weeks, I want to try it longer, maybe permanently. I’ve learned a lot, but I don’t want to keep leaning on you, worried that there’s so much more to learn.

From Alan: There’s nothing to learn that you’re not bright enough to teach yourself. In some ways, I’m amazed we’ve gone this long. You live in a fuller world than I do. And here’s that picture you’ve been wanting..

From Marc: Wow. Thanks. That’s something I never expected. We are complete.

From Alan: Maybe. Who knows? Meanwhile, take care.

From Marc: My partner and I have a trip planned when this project is finally done. A small island north of Australia, with a house mostly open to the beach. And he’s remembered that he once liked to be inside of me and then carry on a conversation. How about that?

From Alan: I like the idea of you both naked, in the sand, with your partner’s dick buried deep. And maybe him quoting Spinoza.

From Marc: He’s not that deep. I’ll settle for Stephen King.

From Alan: Again, take care.

From Marc: You, too.