[Lugh] It Was a Holy Day

[Lugh]

It Was a Holy Day

 

Prince Anarix is finally Bound. However, much to his father’s displeasure he cannot recall who that might be. Therefore, the King has given his only son until the moon turns to locate his mate or join the priesthood and forfeit the crown.

 

 

So... what did you all think?

[Renee Stevens]

I really enjoyed this story, just as much as I have everything else that I've read by you. I especially like how this story focus's on Rix and though it continues the storyline of "It Was A Monday" it is entirely readable on it's own. The background that a reader gets from reading "It Was A Monday" is helpful, but not necessary. I was giddy with excitement when Elmera discovered the deception and brought the truth to the attention of her father. You spin an interesting tale and I am still trying to figure out how you come out with such stories!

[Lugh]

whoot someone actually read it!

 

thank you!

 

I tried really hard to make this one fun to read and action packed. I really hope I succeeded. There is another one coming for the "Walk on the Wild Side" Summer 2011 Anthology. I'm not quite ready to release details, but it will be... similar... in style.

 

again...

 

thank you!

[Renee Stevens]

Anybody who doesn't read it is missing out! I would recommend it to anyone who asks! Looking forward to the one for the "Walk on the Wild Side" anthology! And yes, you succeed in what you set out to do!

[Cia]

Do we have practice with hidden cameras much Lugh? Darn teenagers! I really do like how you can spin a fantasy story. I love our modern fiction shorts but I think your true talent lies in making up whole new worlds for your readers. Rix's family, his society, his whole universe is so fascinating. Besides, who wouldn't want a huge lavendar haired muscle man or a guy with a naughty naughty tail (from Monday). I know readers will be just as thrilled with the next installment. Can't wait!

 

 

[Lugh]

I do not have practice with HIDDEN cameras!

 

and all teenagers are naughty, at least to some degree.

 

so for every one who comes after... (and those before)... what did you like best?

 

POSSIBLE SPOILERS BELOW

 

 

 

 

 

personally I liked the fact I wrote it with so little sex

 

and the fact that through the whole thing, Puck was the focus but he was not in any scene at all... I had told people I was gonna do it and they said it was not possible... do you think I pulled it off?

[Renee Stevens]

I do not have practice with HIDDEN cameras!

 

and all teenagers are naughty, at least to some degree.

 

so for every one who comes after... (and those before)... what did you like best?

 

POSSIBLE SPOILERS BELOW

 

 

 

 

 

personally I liked the fact I wrote it with so little sex

 

and the fact that through the whole thing, Puck was the focus but he was not in any scene at all... I had told people I was gonna do it and they said it was not possible... do you think I pulled it off?

 

Yes, you did pull it off, and amazingly well. There are so many awesome parts in this story that it's hard to pick one... Just a couple are when Rix asks his sister if he can borrow her husband, Amberly falling into Rix's lap, and the scene where Rix was not allowed entry for the Ritual of the Sunrise.

[Lugh]

LOL I used two of those for teasers.

 

I'm terrible, but yes they were funny. Got to make you laugh to keep you reading. Honestly I liked the part where Torzet couldn't get through the barrier. He is such a spoiled brat.

[Marzipan]

I do not have practice with HIDDEN cameras!

 

and all teenagers are naughty, at least to some degree.

 

so for every one who comes after... (and those before)... what did you like best?

 

POSSIBLE SPOILERS BELOW

 

 

 

 

 

personally I liked the fact I wrote it with so little sex

 

and the fact that through the whole thing, Puck was the focus but he was not in any scene at all... I had told people I was gonna do it and they said it was not possible... do you think I pulled it off?

 

 

But there were scenes with Puck in them, though he was totally silenced in this story. That was just such coy trick from you! I loved it. Made me a bit (a lot) grazy too. So nice not to satisfy all the expectations a reader might have. In my mind close to geniousness. Not quite... I need more, soon, to determinate just how close you'll get!

[Nephylim]

Of course you pulled it off, you always do. This story is such an epic. It's fab how you can read bits taken out of context and still love them even if you don't know the rest of the story. It's quite poignant though, when you do know the rest of the story which, I thnk I should mention, could do with some addition

 

This is a very delicately written vignette and I loved the interaction between the boys and Uncle Prude always makes me smile.

 

I particularly like the fact that you keep the incredibly complex relationships so much in hand and understandable.

 

Fab as aways Lugh

 

 

[Dark]

I got lost a bit with all the character names and trying to remember who was related to whom and where they all were, especially as the action started to heat up. That being said, I definitely don't think I needed to read the preceding story to understand what was going on. I do think that if the chapters (episodes?) are all going to be separate like this, though, that a little more time be given to reminding us who all the characters are.

 

I loved how the action started getting faster and faster, and I enjoyed learning about Puck from everyone else. But is he alive??? Was he the sick one or the one they tortured? I have so many questions for those characters!! Damn you, Lugh -- cliffhangers!

 

Oh! Forgot to say that my favorite bits were the interactions between Rix and his brother-in-law. They felt real to me and were absolutely delightful, too.

[Lugh]

I got lost a bit with all the character names and trying to remember who was related to whom and where they all were, especially as the action started to heat up.

Yes someone else has asked for a character map, like you find in the back of a fantasy novel.

 

That being said, I definitely don't think I needed to read the preceding story to understand what was going on.

Most excellent, that was one major goal. Whew. However, it's really better if you do!

 

I do think that if the chapters (episodes?) are all going to be separate like this, though, that a little more time be given to reminding us who all the characters are.

I will keep that in mind for the future pieces cause that may be rather important soon.

 

I loved how the action started getting faster and faster, and I enjoyed learning about Puck from everyone else. But is he alive??? Was he the sick one or the one they tortured? I have so many questions for those characters!! Damn you, Lugh -- cliffhangers!

Are cliffhangers even possible in short stories? Really? Nah I don't think so. I can't tell you if he's alive, cause then I'd have to kill ya, but if you read it very very very carefully the story tells you if he's alive -- or not. You can ask your questions, I might be able to clear up some things and it will tell me what I might need to include -- answer wise in a future installment.

 

Oh! Forgot to say that my favorite bits were the interactions between Rix and his brother-in-law. They felt real to me and were absolutely delightful, too.

 

Heh.. they were funny weren't they. I can't wait for Bri and Elmera to come face to face on equal footing.

[Lugh]

Of course you pulled it off, you always do. This story is such an epic. It's fab how you can read bits taken out of context and still love them even if you don't know the rest of the story.

 

Awww thanks.

 

It's quite poignant though, when you do know the rest of the story which, I thnk I should mention, could do with some addition

 

Maybe we should talk....

 

This is a very delicately written vignette and I loved the interaction between the boys and Uncle Prude always makes me smile.

 

delicate? who you callin' delicate?

 

I particularly like the fact that you keep the incredibly complex relationships so much in hand and understandable.

 

Snickers -- you so do not want to see the timeline on this thing... it all happens in such a short period of time and sooo much happens. Think about it. Now imagine -- Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter -- one timeline. Yeah.

 

Fab as aways Lugh

 

Thanks baby! So you ready for "It Was a Work Day" coming soon to a beta reader near you....

[Lugh]

But there were scenes with Puck in them, though he was totally silenced in this story. That was just such coy trick from you! I loved it. Made me a bit (a lot) grazy too. So nice not to satisfy all the expectations a reader might have. In my mind close to geniousness. Not quite... I need more, soon, to determinate just how close you'll get!

 

I guess what I meant to say was Puck never said/did anything. He did have any active parts.

[rlmarc]

Very well written. Well done Lugh!

[Lugh]

Very well written. Well done Lugh!

 

Thanks Marc

 

Glad you enjoyed it.

 

So what did you like the best?

[Andrew Q Gordon]

Let me say I know this is going to sound SO bizarre when said about your writing but - this was too short. Sorry it was.

 

I touched on it in the review but there was too much going on for the time you spent. Either cut down the number of characters - not my first choice, or add another 10K words.

 

 

I say add because despite the confusion I think it has in it, the core, the make the reader care about the character is there. The world leaps off at us, but then we move away confused. This is not a dig at the story - I guess I just wanted to know more. You tossed out so much but explained so little.

 

Anyway, that is what you do, isn't it? This way people will come to your forum, even if it is just to bitch [not that you venture onto other peoples forums so this is where you lavish your wit and humor I see. ]

[Lugh]

Let me say I know this is going to sound SO bizarre when said about your writing but - this was too short. Sorry it was.

 

omg

too short?

please tell me you joke!

 

you do realize I cut out so much that I had to make "It Was a Work Day" right? (which is currently sitting at 13k words)

 

rolls over and dies.

 

I touched on it in the review but there was too much going on for the time you spent. Either cut down the number of characters - not my first choice, or add another 10K words.

 

add another 10k words -- hear that Cia -- ADD WORDS!

 

I say add because despite the confusion I think it has in it, the core, the make the reader care about the character is there. The world leaps off at us, but then we move away confused. This is not a dig at the story - I guess I just wanted to know more. You tossed out so much but explained so little.

 

totally get it, but I'm getting better... I am practicing. I think I'm getting better. tell me I'm getting better. please.

 

Anyway, that is what you do, isn't it? This way people will come to your forum, even if it is just to bitch [not that you venture onto other peoples forums so this is where you lavish your wit and humor I see. ]

 

not too many people's forums that i'm welcome in... been flat out told to keep out of a few... so I just hang out here most the time. it's all good. and if you notice, not too many people come in here either.

[Andrew Q Gordon]

not too many people's forums that i'm welcome in... been flat out told to keep out of a few... so I just hang out here most the time. it's all good. and if you notice, not too many people come in here either.

 

 

You're always welcome in my forum - just obey Rule 3 and we will get along fine.

[Lugh]

You're always welcome in my forum - just obey Rule 3 and we will get along fine.

 

I'm afraid to ask and afraid to look.

 

[Andrew Q Gordon]

 

Off topic? Okay, fine, I won't come back.

[Lugh]

Off topic? Okay, fine, I won't come back.

 

Damn I didn't mean it like that.

 

[Sara Alva]

Oookay, I read it, without reading the first which is against my better instinct, so I hope I didn't miss anything important. I'll get to that one, in my long list of to-reads, someday

 

It did take me a little while to let all the character names sink in . . . but that may be because I'm out of practice in reading fantasy. I read over the first bit a few times to get the hang of some of the main characters. Once I got a handle on them, I did get wrapped up in the story, which I found intriguing and highly creative. The world you have created is very complete, and I have to say I agree with Andy-- it has the makings of a novel (or series of novels), which would perhaps allow an even deeper and/or more subtle immersion into the world.

 

Oh, and I'm annoyed at the cliffy at the end, though I'm glad some characters seem to be getting what they deserved

 

Nice work.

[Lugh]

hum... novel.... me? I can't write a novel... I suck at writing novels... anything more than 25k... suck suck suck

[Sara Alva]

hum... novel.... me? I can't write a novel... I suck at writing novels... anything more than 25k... suck suck suck

 

Somehow I find that hard to believe, what with the length of your "short" story